Adam Ruins Everything - Why Weddings Are A Total Rip-Off

Despite your family's wishes, weddings are pointless and expensive displays of wealth.
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In Adam Ruins Everything, host Adam Conover employs a combination of comedy, history and science to dispel widespread misconceptions about everything we take for granted. A blend of entertainment and enlightenment, Adam Ruins Everything is like that friend who knows a little bit too much about everything and is going to tell you about it... whether you like it or not.
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Adam Ruins Everything - Why Weddings Are A Total Rip-Off

[@RamiroBelmaresJr]

I love how Emily tied up Adam and duct taped his mouth but invited him anyway, that's a cool friend! xD

[@keddakedda7939]

Kedda kedda I think it’s a representation that no matter how annoying your friendship is you shouldn’t abandon them just cause they may have very interesting (and an annoying yet true) concept about reality and how it can ruin your life to share with you

[@MrEricSir]

Actually, did you know the concept of having "friends" was invented in 1978 by the greeting card industry?

[@pirate6616]

MrEricSir 😂

[@pluviophileh1849]

@@MrEricSir Are you serious.🙄

[@tgwnn]

@@pluviophileh1849 No.

[@the-thought-machine]

Life lesson: When planning a wedding, say it’s a birthday party to the stores to save money.

[@lunagaia8723]

Lolz thats what I was thinking 😂

[@zacheryjequinto7259]

Just say that the theme is wedding

[@Tk-ou9ec]

Just don’t get married Whhhhhhhy

[@carlwebber4094]

Just say your wife/husband is your brother/sister or you could just get married on your birthday to your siblings

[@mythqil3696]

@@carlwebber4094 sorry what

[@WVURxMan]

I got married in 2005 at a courthouse. It literally cost me $17. Almost 15 years later, we are still married and very happy.

[@SmallSpoonBrigade]

That was a really good deal. I can't recall exactly what I spent, but it was about $150 for the ceremony.

[@matildamaher2650]

And you are still happily married, that’s true love. Most people want a grand wedding , mostly end up in divorce. We got married in 2006, since my families were in India and his are in Sydney. So hubby, close friends and church members did most of the arrangements. We had a wonderful wedding. Coming up to 15 yrs soon.

[@gabinoangelalvarez8878]

What state did you get married in? Court marriages are not cheap and $17 sounds sketchy no offense

[@WVURxMan]

@@gabinoangelalvarez8878 Parkersburg, West Virginia in 2005. Judge's name, and this sounds made up, too, was Judge Fantasia.

[@WVURxMan]

@Lefty BStube Tax benefits. Duh.

[@danielafernandez7484]

They’re not wrong about the wedding tax my friend said they charged her lesss for food and cake when she said it was for a birthday party and then her mom went and said it was for a wedding and boom the price suddenly changed

[@trigger721]

A couple I know had a christening for their child already scheduled and paid for. At the cerimony the woman whips up a white dress from underneath her clothing and suddently it's a wedding/christening. The organizers were pissed, but at the end it was all already paid for and they didn't seek to charge extra just because the priest also married the couple.

[@mollymay4846]

Demi Rodrigues totally!! We told our venue we were having a coming home party! True, we WERE coming home .... but we just happened to just get married abroad and needed a totally “not-reception” party when we got home 😜😜

[@kenshinhimura2322]

Daniela Fernandez that’s just gross. And why did mom have to go and blab

[@NODE1975]

We found out while ordering a wedding cake for one of my brothers. A wedding cake was about $300 to start add $100 for each tier. The baker told us that it was cheaper to buy three heart shaped cakes of different sizes and cake tiers to level them appropriately. We orders 3 heart shapes and tiers for less than $100. This was back in 2004 or 2005.

[@SmallSpoonBrigade]

I won't deal with one of the local bakeries any more because they refused my choice of colors for a birthday cake because it was reserved for weddings. Now, I understand why, but there's no way in hell I'm buying a cake from a baker that tells me that I can't have the colors I want on my cake because they don't think I'm good enough to have them. F that.

[@HitomiNoRyu]

My parents had a simple ceremony inside their house and invited only 10 people when they got married...they are still together after 36 years.

[@willy_th3_walrus257]

HitomiNoRyu nice

[@crawlingboy]

HitomiNoRyu that is a real and good wedding a real one where I come from that's how you need to have a wedding

[@streetbob95]

Wow, they had a house? Lucky.

[@lindseywalker8245]

HitomiNoRyu my mom and stepdad got married in our backyard and the only people there were me, my brothers, the priest, and the people who had to confirm they were them

[@georgesalisbury5996]

Although, I've heard that a long guest list actually helps marriages last longer!

[@bef9612]

"you're breaking your mother's heart" I'm so angry at how manipulative that is lol.

[@stephenking5852]

It makes me mad too

[@melelconquistador]

I answer that with "good". I love my mom, and know she understands the costs. But the point is not to let it get to you.

[@hamzaboumazouna5959]

If she wants it so badly, she should pay for it herself. This kinda controlling behavior is why I have bad familial relationships.

[@HeelerHouse]

Lol the mom is secretly a worker for the wedding company

[@DC...]

PGPlayz No. She works for the government. The government owns that company. They own every child's mind after decades of indoctrination. Even have teachers and children picking on people based on politics that assume others to be evil. It's hilarious.

[@paperclip9558]

i dont get it why so many people misunderstood the video. He criticized the wedding industry, who constantly rip off people for no reason, not the practice.

[@cruzgomes5660]

Well, until the very end that is...

[@aaronhamos5925]

Why get married to begin with?

[@Hakitosama]

@@aaronhamos5925 depends on the law in your country. In mine ? It's symbolic at best because married couples don't any additional advantages compared to co-inhabitants

[@katherinemorelle7115]

I helped a mate organise her wedding. We made absolutely sure to never mention that anything we were buying was for a wedding (except for the dress), it was for a birthday party, or some other event. Kept the costs right down.

[@Dreareoxo]

Smart.

[@jauxro]

squad goals

[@Junkmeister]

Besties forever

[@Novumic]

Genius

[@chickofmusic001]

Genius

[@forever_toaster]

"Ohh! My cake is as white as all my friends!" im dead

[@ellie-rl5ik]

she actually had an indian friend and whenever anyone was rude to him she accused them of being racist

[@smokeylebear1062]

ellie smith not true

[@scp--297]

😂😂😂

[@ellie-rl5ik]

Smokey Le Bear yes it is

[@adrielrosado6038]

forever_toaster same bro

[@katiezewe1846]

When I got married we did it at a court house. It cost a little over $100. We gave family about 2 weeks notice. We did it because my Mom's health was failing and we both knew she wanted to see us get married. It's a good thing we didn't wait because she passed away a week later. R.I.P mommy

[@LvndrHppE2]

Katie Zewe My condolences on your loss. I’m glad your mom got to see you get married. I’m sure it meant a lot to you.

[@snoppdeng2]

Condolences, but yeah, I kind of think you did it the "right" way (as if it exists). You were going to do it anyway, suddenly your timetables shifted and you made do. It's only a ceremony to make it "official", it doesn't have to be this big ballgame stuff that the vid depicts. My cousin got married at the courthouse 15 years ago, and she's still married and they're going strong, so it's just a formality for what your closest should already know about the two of you, and a small celebration on top of that.

[@frederickhoward5598]

Still the incorrect and wrong reason, although you choose

[@SmallSpoonBrigade]

I did more or less the same thing. And it was a good thing we did because a week or two later the whole state shut down. But, we were legally married by that point, and if we had waited to do a more elaborate ceremony it would have been a tremendous mess.

[@katiezewe1846]

@@frederickhoward5598 How was it incorrect or the wrong reason?

[@T1J]

These clips make this show seem cynical and pessimistic but it's actually really sweet and hopeful if you watch the full episodes.

[@iamacatperson7226]

Yea, I noticed that too

[@rosagarciaortiz3492]

Too bad i am poor

[@austinmajor3288]

Yes, but when you think about it, who really watches the full episode anyway? People are too lazy to do that and just watch these clips. For those who just couldn't afford it, that's understandable and blame the television industry for that. They used to have full episodes of these on KZbin for free, not So Much Anymore.

[@user-md8pe2xn4y]

​@@austinmajor3288 ​I'm not from USA and I don't have an American TV provider, so it's really sad for me

[@austinmajor3288]

@@user-md8pe2xn4y ouch, didn't think about that, I apologize for that

[@inakilasa4112]

A point Adam made is the reason I love my family, for my cousin's wedding, my grandmother was complaining about the small size and the amount of money they saved planing it, so my cousin told my grandmother "if you don't like it you can leave, because today is not about you"

[@kristynicole6201]

And factor in the fact that millenials make less than our parents did and that everything is costing more than it ever has. No wonder no one wants to get married or have kids.

[@RoronoaZoro-ur6hr]

Kristy Hamlin, that and the MGTOW/Incel movement is the most popular in the West.

[@candlestyx8517]

@@RoronoaZoro-ur6hr Social engineering to ensure the west is outbred and replaced

[@juliuscaesar1062]

@@RoronoaZoro-ur6hr feminism plays a more imprtant role and is much more popular

[@WhateverArtist]

@@juliuscaesar1062 How? I don't remember seeing any popular feminists videos telling people to not get married and have kids.

[@juliuscaesar1062]

@@WhateverArtist wait....u cant?

[@carlawatches8361]

the sims shopping music always make everything better

[@JD..........]

omg the nostalgia......

[@PurpleWind64]

Is it public domain or somethin'? I swear I've heard it used on Impractical Jokers too.

[@puffpuffgrande4875]

carlawatches lmao I was thinking that was the Sims music😂

[@Tarrabyte]

No it's not. The sims 3 music is composed by Steve Jablonsky. He also did a few extra things for them as well.

[@killoutx5699]

carlawatches w

[@BlueBass2]

the whole “wedding vs birthday party pricing” argument really frustrates me. as a wedding photographer, my pricing is the same regardless of the event, and i hate that this pricing strategy has really made couples sour and secretive. it’s an awful foot to start on, and i hope vendors who charge differently stop soon.

[@beetdiggingcougar]

Make it clear in your advertising/website and you'll likely have lots of referrals

[@punklover99]

You're one of the better places out there

[@cameosix7077]

"In fact the entire ceremony has been hijacked by a greedy industry looking to make a buck" Me: Isn't every thing in America hijacked by greedy industries looking to make money

[@noonehere4332]

The whole country is a greedy industry looking to make money.

[@poilboiler]

Not the things that were made by greedy industries looking to make money from the beginning.

[@land2097]

exactly

[@allysonchen4286]

PREACH!!!!!!!!

[@rachelgreer3457]

Wedding tax or stress tax, no one expects a birthday cake to be "perfect". We're skipping the cake for the best French pastries in town.

[@l.tc.5032]

TBH if I was tied up and gaged I'd have objected too.

[@Kirakoyote]

L. T C. I'd be turned on ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

[@toxify007]

+Surge The Coyote same

[@l.tc.5032]

Yes but I'm not a masochist.

[@sailordarty9032]

I OBJECT! "On what grounds?" That I'm not even getting cake after this!

[@idkman700]

Same

[@GruppeSechs2004]

I'd like to see Adam Ruins the Prom, or any other type of dog-and-pony show.

[@gavinreed7214]

His Dudeness he did ruin dogshows

[@alwashington8364]

I'd like to see adam get an old fashioned a$$ whoopin. For snitchin.

[@anonx3332]

Al Washington dude what

[@nikkoruchan]

Debutante balls please

[@gamingsherlock1879]

Yeah he ruined dogs and said that every dog breed have been so inbred that it was so unhealthy for them

[@ire1398]

I was more focused on my marriage than my wedding. When people pissed me off I suggested eloping. Never regretted it, and yes I’m a woman.

[@ire1398]

@Sabrina Belladonna when I was talking to my dad about this recently I told him that one of the things that got me thinking that way is that the money he was giving us was not for the wedding - it was starting out money. He smiled and said we were smart. 22 years in and we have no mortgage.

[@zombiedietitian]

Gasp, a WOMAN?

[@taleseylad1249]

@@zombiedietitian chill, it's a woman it can't be that big a deal

[@Fabricjunkie424]

This was so spot on! I worked at a Bridal Shop the year I got married and I couldn't believe what people were willing to spend on one day. We spent less than $400 on our wedding in 2006. We've been together for 17 years and married for 13 years. I love the static that says people who spend less are together longer because we are one of them!

[@basscanon6687]

that's technically not true. people who go in debt over their wedding are more likely to divorce, but if they had the budget to begin with that won't be the case.

[@sihyuanwu5492]

"Adam Ruins Everything" in a nutshell. Corporate greed and money has caused a lot of f*cking problems for people all over the world.

[@alexandrpetrov6812]

Yeah

[@hwllhei6554]

You know this isn’t by force right.

[@TheReal_Antrey]

@@hwllhei6554 no, It's by paying someone else to do it by force

[@werebilbyj4449]

Don't get me started on mother's day, easter, Christmas, or Valentines days. Geez!

[@aaronhamos5925]

Not to mention the environment.

[@ameliecarre4783]

I love that the bride is chill and the groom is the one pissed at having his dream-wedding interrupted 😁

[@siriousholmes]

my parents didn’t even have a wedding, they got married on my moms lunch break where they just signed some papers and then went back to work

[@Torfindra]

Love it!

[@allymadison8112]

Your parents are so real for that

[@lirrobinson8377]

Spent $400 on my wedding. We got over $1,000 in gift cards and not all the guests showed at the restaurant. So we made a little over $500 and got a free lunch the next day 😂 We're still married too(going on 8yrs).

[@GerhardMack]

Yeah, had some friends turn a profit as well. Bride's father was a pastor so he did the ceremony, it was in their back yard so no rental fees. The celebration after was in a Legion hall so cheap as well and since they were going overseas, asked for cash rather than gifts they couldn't transport.

[@dante_0962]

It’s been a year what about now?

[@sarahp6554]

Your wedding can be whatever you want it to be. It doesn't need to be expensive. I've known people who have gotten married for as little as $200. If you wanted to, you could just go to the courthouse and not do a party. Or you could have a potluck or just go to a restaurant with a few close friends and family members. My wedding and honeymoon combined was about $5,000. My husband and I didn't care about all the pomp and stuff. Just wanted to get together with friends and family, eat some yummy food, and wear clothes that made us feel good. My husband has even worn his wedding day outfit on multiple occasions since. The day is about you and your spouse. Do what makes you happy.

[@perennialistperspective]

i don't know any women or their mom's who would be ok with anything less than the extravagant, expensive, idealized, commercialized wedding, that they have been imagining since they were little girls. then again i live in utah....

[@gpalmer456]

My wife and I did the courthouse thing with just a few of our family members and a friend. Been married 7 years. Woot woot!

[@jennywinter3025]

That’s how it should be

[@CadaverQT]

@@perennialistperspective I also live in Utah, and most of my gal pals got married in a temple and had a cheap LDS churchhouse "ceremony". Not flashy ir extravagant in the least. In fact, there are visible basketball hoops

[@chuckvindaloo2230]

What about the high divorce rate and the fact that humans aren't built to be with one partner all their lives

[@AdamYJ]

I love how Murph's the one who's really into the whole wedding thing. Usually, it would be the bride who's making a big deal of it.

[@restreven4455]

Adam Hoffman I think it’s mostly his mom tbh

[@SmallSpoonBrigade]

Emily is just down to earth like that.

[@daleva187goligo]

nope, you're wrong, it's usually the guy who is the hopeless romantic and blindly believes in love, the girl usually just cares about the pageantry and showing off to her friends, being the center of attention and "queen for a day" it's sickening

[@asmaaa.6163]

@@daleva187goligo damn who hurt you

[@davidhibbs3396]

Because his character is a little b+=×h.lol. I think he enjoys the humor in the role.

[@kittygrimm7301]

I love how their wedding is officiated by the same dude they hired in the How To Plan A Wedding sketch.

[@PistachioMustachio_]

That’s cool

[@theeleanorshellstrop]

ooh lovely bit of continuity! that line about table runners, too

[@jessicamythis8782]

So glad my wedding was simple and small! We were able to talk to everyone, no rush or schedule at all, it was perfect!

[@kojayeoja]

I expected Adam to say at the end that marriage wasn't invented for love either.

[@i_came_from_the_cold1652]

He mentions it in the episode

[@MojaveSun19]

I was expecting to hear that, too. I didn't see where he mentioned it anywhere. Marriages are legal or community contracts and agreements. Many cultures in history didn't factor in love.

[@TheSpencermacdougall]

Well actually...it was used as a political tool to get two familys togever to combine assets and bloodlines/end wars ect. and lets not forget dowerys.

[@saoirse7167]

I think it is fair to say that there has always been a mixture of reasons. Many, if not all cultures have at some point in their history allowed everyone to choose their spouses in an informal ceremony. Marriage is something that has been hijacked by politics and especially religion, not something invented for/by them.

[@stephanies3246]

Well, actually....

[@lawsontake7383]

I've been to a number of weddings, and they all looked and felt the same. I laughed when she mentioned floral centerpieces, those are such a dumb staple. I think that each wedding should be different and special! It doesn't need to be expensive, it just needs to be Memorable!

[@pompe221]

memorable in a good way!

[@SunGodNika-bi2jr]

I would like my wedding to be in color

[@treehugger0241]

I attended the wedding of a gamer couple. The wedding was pretty cookie-cutter, but the following ceremony was definitely their planning. Goldfish bowls filled with figures from different games as the centerpieces, boxes shaped like Mario "?" boxes filled with chocolate coins, the couple heralding their marriage with a game of Mario Kart, and the cake was cut to "Still Alive" from Portal.

[@ire1398]

I interpreted at wedding where the Deaf people removed the centerpieces so they could see one another, and the wedding planner screeched at them.

[@werebilbyj4449]

My mum made my centrepieces and they were lovely! All hand made, she is so ingenious.

[@bunnynjesus4eva]

I got married for $30 at the courthouse. 7 years later we still don’t regret not having a big wedding.

[@Torfindra]

That should be the norm.

[@adqueen2548]

Adam is literally me. Everytime someone is like "You have no idea!" I'm like "I love to learn!"

[@stephaniel1035]

You CAN get married very inexpensively but not scrimp on beauty or style! My entire wedding cost about $1,500 including ceremony, reception, food, champagne, party favors, my dress, and my husband's clothes. You just have to work hard, plan thoughtfully, DIY where possible, and remember that more more more! doesn't mean happy happier happiest!

[@jelliclesongs]

so cool!

[@CalLadyQED]

How much was the DIY, really? What was the cost of your time, energy, etc. to do that stuff yourself?

[@queenofsevens]

this is especially true if you're someone who loves to DIY! i made my bouquet and our handfasting cords 🥰 yeah we saved a bunch of money that way, but i also enjoyed making them and they feel so much more special than they would if i had just bought them online

[@punklover99]

Or in the courthouse for almost nothing

[@Metal_Sign-Friday_Patchouli]

My brother in Byakuren 1.5k is _not_ inexpensive

[@geekboyicochet6685]

3:33 he put his heart and soul into tht line😂😂😂

[@annaburns2865]

“And her more than one lung.” 2:30 That caught me so off guard! 🤣

[@lyraferal5618]

I would have never married if it meant that my partner was going to spend our life savings on one day. My family is worth more than one party.

[@ire1398]

We did that too and now we have a house, 2 cars and little debt.

[@jbarral6509]

@@ire1398 how do you manage that when you get married

[@ire1398]

@@jbarral6509 courthouse wedding, our witnesses took us out to dinner, close by honeymoon and on sale rings. The money my dad gave us wasn’t for the wedding, it was for starting out...oh and our biggest money saving decision - not to have kids.

[@diamondfox1178]

@@ire1398 Those gremlins eat up about 300k in the 18 years that you gotta raise them, and that's not even counting supporting them after they're 18. Kids cost a lot of money.

[@diamondfox1178]

@Lefty BStube yeah 300k is basic food, water, shelter, and clothing. Anything extra is probably gonna cost more.

[@joevsyou]

Do a wedding if you want but never go in debt for one... spend no more then your fun money because that wy it's there. I have seen a few people take out loans for wedings and i am like WTF? and even a father of a daughter go in $9,000 in debt...

[@allyb3510]

joevsyou my parents entire wedding cost 1700. Including outfits, flowers, accessories, the overheard tents, decor, the officiate, licensing and paperwork plus food. And my grandpa paid for most of it. I completely believe in cheap weddings.

[@whoiswho9081]

Good profile pic. Also, all hail lelouch!

[@aaronlandry3934]

joevsyou Just have a small wedding, nothing extravagant. You’ll save plenty that way.

[@prncessbaby16]

Aaron Landry my guest list is already at 54 people and the all inclusive venue is $3,000. Any tips on how I can lower the guest list to make it cheaper ? We'd rather spend those thousands on a down payment on a house.

[@juliandevorak2268]

Cheyenne Michelle-Rena You could probably only invite close family members and close friends. Also, if you want, maybe your boss.

[@TheSaltyLibrarian]

I used to sweep hair in a salon during the summer when I was in high school. My bosses were all around good, friendly, mostly honest people.They labelled their prices and said straight up that hair and make up for weddings cost way extra. They did it because they knew they could and they pulled in a lot of revenue, but couldn't bring themselves to concealing the ordinary prices from people. The weird thing is, I remember a lot of people paying for it anyway. They just figured that if it was labelled for a wedding, they were doing it wrong if they didn't spend extra money.

[@Princessshamanarta]

Aah I have visited tons of salons - mostly for work - and the thing was no "hood" or "cheap" hairstylist would ever try to do a bride's makeup, because they felt they were unprepared for that solemn stuff. Unless the hairstylist had an equivalent degree in makeup and beauty styling in Paris, no one would "advertise" themselves as "we can do bride and bridesmaids makeup". It's a big thing here in Europe. Just saying - you're paying for the over 100 dollars hair products, the amount of high-end makeup (which is expensive af) , the electricity of the hair-dryer, the water, and that 1500 Euros worth Beauty master degree. You ain't paying no fraud scheme. Yes, it costs a lot more than the typical "wash and brushing + natural makeup". Back in the 2000s, it just felt like a crime for people to ad themselves as pro makeup artists or hair-stylists if they don't have the skills. Even today, people still refer to the "hood" hairstylists as "cabelereiras de bairro" (literally suburbia hairdressers).

[@jennifergonzalez634]

Is that Bob Vance Vance refrigeration?!

[@ericbrown9201]

Jennifer Gonzalez it is!

[@denisesoria3115]

IKR

[@serenapolak9489]

Omg I was trying to figure out why he looked familiar!!

[@girlwithamic8021]

Okay I was actually raised in a bakery, and I’ve noticed there’s a minimal or even nonexistent uptake in a lot of the small bakeries I’ve seen for weddings. For instance, my mothers bakery had a small increase in price, but she delivered for weddings, and wedding cakes are some of the most stressful things to make. You’re paying for the ridiculous amount of stress the baker is going through to make that cake perfect(and extra services). Just buy from the small businesses y’all

[@112556]

But if they ask for a birthday cake and that’s why they receive and don’t complain, there’s no problem, right?

[@musa2775]

I have always felt that traditional weddings are boring and pointless! I was engaged for a moment and planning the wedding was awful. I just wanted to have a party at a local outdoor brewery and rent a couple boats for the week. Then it turned into having to invite his cousins who he hadn't spoken to in 20 years, coordinating which of his parents would come and if they were allowed to bring their SOs who they cheated on each other with, making sure my mom didn't feel left out because she says she was treated so badly at my brother's wedding, having to send thank you cards to people who insisted on buying us crap when I expressly asked for no gifts, having to deal with a bunch of dumb one-time use decorations, etc. I wanted to just stay how we were. Too much stress! It wasn't about the two of us at all. We ended our engagement and broke up before it happened. Still friends! So glad I never had to go through a divorce. Phew.

[@MrCmon113]

I'd be extremely pissed if I got invited to a wedding and then missed out on my free booze. You could have at least thrown a break up party with beer and cocaine.

[@musa2775]

@@MrCmon113 we were gonna pay for the open brewery tab for our guests... Ew no thanks on the coke. Yikes.

[@dante_0962]

@@musa2775what about crack?

[@morefiction3264]

"Despite your family's wishes, weddings are pointless and expensive displays of wealth" -- absolutely

[@donaldoehl7690]

TRUTH!

[@TKZells16]

A lot of young couples are actually having smaller and more frugal weddings. My friends got got married at city hall and then had a small reception in their backyard. And honestly it was more fun than the more extravagant weddings I’ve been to.

[@Princessshamanarta]

yeah...but that's when couples actually have understanding families or when the couple manages to shut the Narcissistic/Boogee people down. My Best friend managed to shut her very vain Mom and still agree on something elegant and relatively expensive. Any middle-class-born Millenial with a relatively religious background will tell you their relatives (especially Moms or Grandmoms ) tried to guilt them into having a big wedding or they broke off contact because "my little child won't have their BIG day like it's SUPPOSED TO!" My cousin began his career as a wedding photographer - got exhausted and freaking tired of all the soap opera and narcissistic drama.

[@phoebexxlouise]

My friend was a wedding videographer and has been to so many weddings. They're all so similar they've blurred into one. I helped her out at a wedding expo once and it was crazy how many different expensive ideas there were for trying to make it individual. Personalised coasters for guests and coffee table books of the photos, etc etc etc

[@LucidDreamer54321]

The last wedding I went to was in a state park (very scenic and no access charge). The only things the bride and groom purchased were the marriage license and a set of rings that did not have any jewels. Instead of bringing presents, the guests brought food for a pitch-in lunch. Children were welcome and after lunch we all played fun games. It was the only wedding I really enjoyed attending.

[@skyr8449]

" my cake is as white as all my friends "

[@joyswenson7941]

The fact that weddings have been hijacked by this kind of greed and extravagance saddens me so much. My husband and I kept it simple (by industry standards), I hit up clearance sales for fake flowers, Easter candy, we had an outdoor reception at a local park so I didn’t have to worry about decorating a space (just the table tops- simple). Total was about $4-5 thousand (I didn’t know all the saving tricks of the trade), but everyone had a good time, we focused on the purpose of a marriage, and we are doing just fine nearly 10 years later.

[@tifanyshirley]

As someone who hates the idea of having a "traditional wedding" I absolutely love this episode.

[@Quinntus79]

One phrase that alerts my BS sensor: “This is the way things have always been.” 1. If you go back far enough I’m willing to bet you’ll find a time when the tradition hasn’t always been around. 2. So what if the tradition has been around for a long time? Times change. If the tradition no longer makes sense why keep it?

[@jackthorton10]

Exactly, things change people change but the trends differ

[@vaderladyl]

Oh people do a lot of stuff that doesn't make any sense because of a sense of loyalty or duty to some form of tradition.

[@caleblewis8169]

Breathing is the way things have always been

[@peascoutpesante9456]

@@caleblewis8169 nope, when you were just a collection of scrabbled, un-bonded molecules, breathing wasn't even a thing

[@caleblewis8169]

@@peascoutpesante9456 molecules are the way things have always been

[@brunocar02]

to be honest i think this is the first time adam ruins something really important

[@tiffanysamuels279]

the fact that a video about basic facts can destroy something show how strong the foundations to these weddings. most of the video is about how consumerism and money have brought a huge factor into weddings. The fact that people opinion change after this wedding shows how useful this video is. Especially since most people marriage is revolved around money since their finances are combine and that reflect their ability for the rest of their life.

[@tiffanysamuels279]

I was responding to the person above me, they stated that it destroyed weddings and that's my reply to the people with those mindset, if it could be destroyed in a four minute video that shows how strong of the concept of marriage is.

[@Awesomeman204]

wow you think funerals aren't important?

[@brunocar02]

Awesomeman204 Did he ruin that? no, she only really made one feel one person bad, but in the end she wasn't as mad so its not like adam ruined it

[@KyanneSummer]

brunocar he ruined the fake fantasy the lies the fake traditions not the love

[@EveryThingGirl238]

Mom: where are the flora center pieces? Me; My wedding, my money, my rules.... I ain't forcing you to be here.

[@TiffanyRay]

exactly

[@donaldoehl7690]

I hope you like the cheap Walmart toaster I sent you!

[@werewolfpup14]

Surprisingly watching this makes me feel better because when me and my husband got married we didn’t have any money for a nice fancy wedding so we got married at the courthouse and because of that courthouse wedding some of my family members don’t know that I’m married because I am ashamed of how we had our wedding. My family is just like the ones in this episode where u have to have so many extravagant things to show love but me and my husband have a better relationship than anyone I know

[@GM-ls7nb]

Holy crap Bob Vance from the office is in this!

[@epsdudez]

No, that's Bob Vance from Vance Refrigeration.

[@diegocarrero2812]

🤣

[@thomasmacdonald8735]

Murph reminds me of Andy Bernard from "The Office"

[@fandomwebbie]

oh my gosh same!

[@jaredbench1313]

Mhm

[@PlotTwists]

all i saw is bob vance ... vance refregiration

[@elizabeth_b]

Male Man same. first thing I thought☺

[@trueminimalist3962]

A man of so few words, yet so much is said in them.

[@DoNutx777]

If there are any bright side from 2020, one of them would be challenging the traditional (expensive) concept of weddings

[@user-jy3zl2vp4b]

And stopping people from buying expensive clothing just to show off (since no one is going anywhere!). Love it!

[@rhunter42dragon]

2:40 It would have been funny if the poor bride had shoved Victoria's face into that cake.

[@757gamerguy2]

I'm a professional photographer and I charge the same for a wedding as I do for any event. As long as the couple doesn't prints it albums, price is always the same

[@FlameableMusic]

And what is your point exactly? There are still plenty of sellers that -do- overprice, I'm glad that you don't...but that doesn't mean others won't do it.

[@neolightproductions]

Really? I’d think a wedding would be a lot harder than a birthday party. You gotta plan all those shoots in between ceremony and reception. Plus all the special pictures during the reception. I’m not a photographer but I’d imagine that takes extra work to plan all those shots. Where with a birthday party you’d just show up and take a bunch of pictures. Also editing has to be different for both. Or quality of pictures. Probably have to bring different gear to get those low light situations. So extra gear like umbrellas, flash, whatever all those stands are called that they setup during reception.

[@emmathurgood]

My wedding price is only 10% higher than my other event pricing because of this exact reason. The amount of planning that goes into my wedding photography jobs is more than my other event photography and the stress on me to get it right is 1000x more, not to mention the expectation for me to capture more of what's happening at a wedding than a child's birthday (and the wear and tear that put on my gear, making me have to replace it or upgrade it sooner as a result). So yeah, Adam. Some vendors do charge more for their wedding services than their other services, but it's not just cause we feel like it. Dig a little deeper next time instead of saying something clever that fits the narrative.

[@jennamichelephotography5137]

Weddings cost more because they take more work, more planning, more equipment, more experience/training, and so much more is riding on every vendor getting it perfect. Because we are funding our livelihood with a fee that should (but often doesn't) afford us health insurance and retirement funds as a small business. And we have to be there no matter what, unless we're in the hospital. You can't cancel on a wedding day. So yes, a small birthday party for 3 hours will cost $350, and an 8 hr wedding will be $1400 on average (for me). If you'd rather pay around $300 for a wedding, you totally can! But that person will be inexperienced, likely without proper insurance, probably only does this part-time (occasionally or even very rarely), and may not care if they don't do the job right - their livelihood isn't riding on it.

[@ladydontekno]

@@jennamichelephotography5137 I have a couple of friends who have a photography business and you're exactly right. They've told me that the "professionals" who work cheap are usually just some dude with an iPhone or they're brand new to the business and haven't figured out *why* weddings are more expensive. And they tend to get hired by people who think anybody can take a picture.

[@ljimmo]

My wedding cost me in total 2500 dollars and that includes the dress and the place we had the wedding. (and yes I had a real wedding dress that I found second hand. Had I bought it new it would have cost me almost 2000 dollars. I got it for 90 bucks.) But yeah the most expensive things we paid for were my husbands wedding ring (which is not gold..its tungsten with a silver design because he works with his hands alot and we want to the ring not to get bent and warped)My ring and wedding band cost less than his one ring and my engagement ring was not a diamond but an amethyst(hubby objected because it was not expensive enough and I smiled and said"if I am going to shell out 2 months salary it is not going to be on a piece of metal and a rock." Also...I am not a big fan of diamonds.) and the hall.(which we also used to hold the wedding and reception in. And my parents paid for that as our wedding present but I am including it in the 2500.)The flowers we actually got fake flowers from the dollar store and a few people asked me how the hell I found black roses in October because they thought the flowers were real.(We got married on Halloween and my wedding colors were black silver and purple) I was not going to go into debt because someone says I should blow a huge amount of money. My wedding was not expensive but I still remember it and it was a very happy day for me.

[@Gsoda35]

That is a wonderful story! I wish you all the best of life.

[@donaldoehl7690]

I feel sorry for the poor bastards that have like 4 daughters that all want a big fancy wedding a nd they destroy their financial future for this nonsense!

[@jonahkrynski8001]

As a photographer, I would like to share why wedding photographers are more expensive. A wedding is such an important event, and it's really crucial that we don't miss any shots because we can't re-do them. Because of that, we charge more for reliability and the promise of being able to get all the shots without missing anything.

[@donaldoehl7690]

My brother did some wedding shoots back in the day. Rules dictated to him were; get paid upon arrival IN CASH! No checks or CCs. If they won't put cash in your hand-LEAVE!. Photogs are last to be paid after all the $$$ is spent and 1st to be stiffed, Wedding party was often painful to tolerate due to alcohol and entitlement. Weddings are a crap event!

[@seankock7649]

What if i allow you to chill anf just take pics like any other day

[@jonahkrynski8001]

@@seankock7649 Then we won't get good shots

[@seankock7649]

@@jonahkrynski8001 all that matters is that i get some photos, who needs big shot super high editing things, i would just pay to take some professional photos not over the top crap

[@land2097]

BS

[@Lana-ne8bd]

“My cake is as white as my friends” XDDDDDD

[@therealbleach6827]

What a beautiful, wedding what a beautiful wedding says a bridesmaid to a waiter

[@gavinking-smith1656]

and yes but what a shame what shame the poor groom's bride is a girl

[@The_Evening_Sun]

+gavin king that's not the line to the song

[@edaj1990]

*I'D CHIME IN*

[@gavinking-smith1656]

Alex Cardozo​that my friend is what you call censoring

[@willy_th3_walrus257]

*I CHIME IN WITH A HAVENT YOU PEOPLE EVER HEARD OF, CLOSING A GOD DAMN DOOR NO*

[@kalijohnston561]

I love this video! However, the argument that “weddings used to be about love but capitalism ruined that” is flawed. While there is def way too much pressure for a huge wedding, now that women have like... rights as stuff, I see them as LESS transactional as they once were.

[@tubbytoad]

Marriages used to be about survival and consolidation of resources. I think one of the main reasons the "important" ones such as those of royalty had so much spent on them as well as the presence of the church was to socially/politically legitimize them.

[@boston312]

give it another generation or so and American weddings will pretty much go extinct (as in progressive Europe). Life by its very essence is about change, you cant expect two people to stay with each other for 50 plus years and hope that they stay the same. Personal development, freedom, happiness and self care will replace this worthless institution.

[@cruzgomes5660]

​@@boston312 I'm sorry that she left you bro

[@mollycblaeser]

I wish we had all our rights.

[@cruzgomes5660]

@@mollycblaeser wym ALL our rights?

[@vow4621]

As an ordained minister, I always do weddings for the price of feeding me a meal. Do you have food? Then you can purchase my services.

[@LoganDX1990]

I actually want to do that for my friends. One so I can help them out without them being stressed with the whole wedding thing and another so I can get a free meal lol

[@vow4621]

@@LoganDX1990 Then you should! Check out American Marriage Ministries. It is non-specific in religion, and you don't even have to take a course or pay any money.

[@Adven4U1]

Good for you! Weddings deserve to be a sacrament, but they have pretty much become a pagan festival since so many religious leaders insist that pepole must throw lavish and expensive weddings or else it's not valid. I'm not sure if this is an issue that exists mainly within the Catholic church, or if it's a problem in other Christian denominations, but I know it exists in other religions. Defund Weddings!

[@mjfleming319]

@@Adven4U1 I’m a pastor and I’ve never heard of another minister insisting that a couple spend a lot on a wedding, so I guess it depends on what religious circles you run in.

[@alicegraham1571]

Queen Victoria was actually progressive. She had guests and friends whom were people of color.

[@JMarchel]

Thank you for sharing this!!

[@aidan2976]

i swear... is that sims music playing in the background?

[@hormpir3648]

ElvenStrider Yes... Yes it is

[@scandathepole723]

Yes

[@dankbudew4830]

Agree with a passion. Weddings are so stupid and a waste of money. Why not use it on yourself to get a new car or shop at your favorite stores???

[@sillyweirdo7014]

Wedding is not stupid if you are wise. I know some people who have big weddings but they are debt free. Only stupid people who have stupid weddings. Learn how to have a good financial-management before deciding a big thing like getting married or building family.

[@BB-bx4dp]

Some people think expensive cars are a stupid waste of money, too!

[@basscanon6687]

it's not a waste if it's what you really want.

[@margaretjohnson6259]

we eloped and had 40 years together, parted only by death. not mine, btw.

[@jagadish20091]

obviously, you are typing this aren't you?

[@saturnprime129]

Sorry for Your Loss

[@toeachitsown2050]

Not mine, ha ha ha. Sorry for your loss dear

[@margaretjohnson6259]

@@JohnSmith-xp9gr SHHHH. that was our secret!

[@donaldoehl7690]

I won't lie, you made me laugh!

[@ednab.9001]

It’s a personal Choice, and some brides and grooms want the extras. My wedding cost less than 4,000 and it was a beautiful simple church wedding. Just choose what’s more important to you and what fits your budget. As for me, booking the church was more important and getting a good deal on a nice dress, (300) ! A gentleman I’ve known since I was a little girl offered to borrow a car and drive me from the hotel to church and to the venue. Just the fact that he wanted to do that for us was a gift in its own. That’s when people are truly happy for you and want to help. I accepted my sisters assistance in the planning and it was her taste in everything we got and did, which was fine with me because I love her taste! Going on more than 18 years of marriage.

[@sayuas4293]

Weddings are stupid for so many reasons.

[@0IIIIII]

What about getting married in a courthouse?

[@sayuas4293]

0IIIIII Getting married in itself is stupid. You legally tie yourself to another person that you can't break up with anymore unless you give them half your stuff. Women in marriages also tend to become fat and stop wanting to have sex. Marriage is a trap.

[@genericusername2]

bahaha how old are you!?

[@sayuas4293]

genericusername1 Amazing. You really showed me.

[@0IIIIII]

Sayuas Ok then sign a prenup. And reap those tax benefits. Even if marriage ceased to be associated with the government and law, it is still a meaningful event to celebrate, like your birthday for instance. Also that part about women getting fat and dry sounds pretty sexist and unsubstantiated. I might agree though that divorce courts tend to favor women though.

[@johnderegirl]

Did anyone else hear the sims four music?

[@quarth1420]

its 4 stupid

[@Zeke-rr8sx]

it's not just on 4 its on 3 too but whatever

[@sj224]

I thought I imagined it lol

[@t3naci0us53]

Where?

[@simmertoddler1632]

That is 3 music you absolute bafoons

[@TheCatWrangler]

Saw this episode years ago and it fully convinced me i don't want an expensive wedding. Just a small creative party. Sorry wedding industry, Adam wins this one.

[@lunamoonlock]

I love that there's a whole series of Adam Ruins Everything videos fully just monetising Emily and Murph's marriage

[@SA-xt1gd]

My wedding was simple af, we rented a simple revenue already decorated and my friend was already a photographer and i RENTED my outfit, plus guests came and they were already full we just offered cake and soda. Some of my friends do weddings in their backyards and still enjoyed themselves. After all the wedding lasted for a few hours

[@RibbidyJamGames]

I love the ending haha :) I love Adam

[@omgshift111]

Re. Wedding tax. In part this is because expectations are much higher. As an ex-florist, I would put more time into wedding arrangements, making sure they would photograph well from every angle, had multiple consults with the bride etc.. I wasn't charging more because it was a wedding, I was charging more because it was literally more work.

[@pizzazz4592]

1:00 Um, Actually? Adam knew about the Um, Actually game show before Dropout even existed lol

[@Spacecookie-]

I think this series should be renamed to 'Adam Ruins Everything for his friends.'

[@jeus_saaa]

SIMS MUSIC

[@ImKrowe]

Im glad my parents were married in a court-room, and they encourage all of our family to do the same. You will save tens of thousands, they say.

[@tjfm2456]

Vox did a great video on this. I’m sure they cover this in the full episode, but at least part of the reason why vendors charge more for weddings is they anticipate there’ll be more emotional labor involved; as in, the clients will probably be more demanding since it’s a wedding. So basically you’re getting up charged because of all the jerks who hassle wedding vendors.

[@shugoibaka]

As someone who works at a server at a wedding place, I laughed so much at the mason jars joke. We have SO MANY MASON JARS.

[@RH-tv9hk]

THANK YOU. This makes me feel better. It makes sense. I've always been bewildered by the costs of weddings. And I'm a woman

[@themovieguru1094]

Emily: Tries to prevent Adam from using his information of the dark side of weddings that will ruin her wedding with Murph. Also Emily: Invites him to her wedding with Murph.

[@dietotaku]

My wedding had all the appearances of a "traditional" wedding but I got it done for under $3k. The venue included catering, the officiant, and let me use my MP3 player for music. I got my dress online for $100, an exact copy of a dress that was $1000 in a boutique. I made my own bouquet, corsages & boutonnieres out of rolled satin ribbon. And we got the cake from Walmart for $20.

[@izzyteare1258]

My parents went all out and spent heaps on their wedding and they still together 27 years later

[@limemabean7251]

A wedding is a day focused exclusively on YOU AND YOUR SIGNIFICANT OTHER! Do whatever the heck you want 😂 and also the "wedding tax" is a real thing. But sometimes it's there for a reason. My friend booked her wedding cake and flowers saying I was for a "family reunion" and they turned out horribly! That's because flowers need to be put out a different times, have to be set up individually, etc., for a wedding which a florist doest put into other events. Much like the cake where the artist spends more time and thought into the decoration, timing, and transportation of a wedding cake compared to a birthday cake. The tax is real, but just be careful trying to avoid it! It can bite you in the butt down the line.

[@nelsonvazquez8104]

I love at 3:15 the marketer said fine luxury comes @ an expensive price it’s not like we’re cheating people. Saying that in such a sarcastic way smh 🤦 . Lol 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

[@goldenscarecrow]

Please add this to the regular tv schedule. This is the best part of your line up

[@MonkeBrain07]

"You may now eat the corn" might be my favourite line in existence

[@aimeetrethewey672]

1:14 I’m surprised he didn’t say “Bob Vance, Vance refrigeration”

[@frankwest018]

Ahhh I get it 😂😂😂😂

[@juststardust8103]

I'm so in love with this video!!

[@johnconn982]

Adam, you’re a beast, man. Just love what you do.

[@zechariahsanders8273]

Photographing a wedding is waaay more stressful than a birthday party of the same size

[@cmholden914]

Here's the thing, the reason you pay more for cakes and flowers is because the people creating your order are going to put more care into it, and more time. They're going to be extra careful with it, because for many people this is a very important day

[@maryreddell6529]

We had a small gathering, i loved my 2nd hand wedding dress & borrowed wedding hat- a lovely meal for the 25 people there after our 5 minute wedding. 40 years later happy as can be!

[@alwaysbegrateful9011]

Someone I know got married and her father borrowed against his house to have a 12,000 dollar event. The marriage lasted less than three months. I was like ," Ouch ."

[@brookebryson9451]

I think weddings, are just a waste of money to sign a contract to say that you're in love with somebody, besides you don't need to say I love you in front of everybody, like what's the point and you're just wasting a whole bunch of money on the clothes, cake presents, food and, music and other stuff

[@basscanon6687]

because if i'm going to marry the man i love i want to celebrate and have a kick ass party.

[@AdaDenali]

I know Adam is about to come in and do a take down, and this is not their real wedding, but makes my heart glad to see Murph and Emily walking down the aisle 😅

[@timesnewlogan2032]

I've been trying to tell people this for YEARS!

[@MrNickP]

We pulled over on the side of the road in Yosemite, just before Glacier Point, and had a friend marry us. Then we spent the rest of the day exploring Yosemite!