Conlang Showcase -- HyperPirate

One mediocre joke about pirates saying "arg," turned into something beyond human comprehension.
Special thanks to Aeternal for doing at least half of the effort creating the details of this language, and the advanced LaTeX slideshow.
www.nguh.org/l...
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[@AprilLVideos]

Someone should dub the entirety of Pirates of the Caribbean into this language

[@tzshchsjsjxijyo]

It would probably be *R* rated

[@goddessoflesbians1153]

99.99999999999% of the words sould be rrrrrrrrrrrr

[@wyntyrr]

It would take like 2 full days, considering how inefficient this language is.

[@alephomega955]

@@wyntyrr months*

[@tailbonetailbone9380]

All the pirates speak Hyperpirate and all the posh Brits speak Hyperformal. Davy Jones speaks in the noises you can make by moving water inside your mouth, as well as beak clicks.

[@xeuxixiliak8417]

Hyperpirate sounds like a colloquial term for an extreme case of scurvy

[@WheatDos]

And sounds like it too!

[@thej3799]

My vitamin c is held near by says I

[@dillonridder8737]

this makes sense for sea-faring people as it just sounds like they're drowning

[@benst6246]

International Talk Like a Pirate Day is on September 19th. Prepare yourselves, mateys.

[@jangamecuber]

* has a fcking stroke *

[@wyntyrr]

Holy shoot that’s tomorrow

[@aidanmahoney9865]

Yay, that’s my birthday

[@girv98]

What a beautiful language! Euphony to rival "cellar door"

[@Feuermiss1405]

This might as well have been the "speaking while gurgling water" language

[@AgmaSchwa]

I actually have considered making a language that is strictly spoken with water in your mouth👀, maybe I should actually do it

[@misterhydra7285]

@@AgmaSchwaI feel like this served as extremely loose inspiration for Gumsmaq

[@konokiomomuro7632]

If anyone gon do it pls put a warning signs "do not try this at home" on for comedic purposes.

[@user-tl8rk6pb6k]

Thoughts: - There's a LOT for future jokelangers to learn from this, especially the amazingly chaotic "romanization". I also really like the nonstandard way you used word order - I think there should be a septemal number, for things like "the seven seas" - it would be interesting to see some sea shanty translations - on the 19th of September, we shall ask (former) Mad Cap'n Tom to look at it, at least so he can see how closer he could've been to the fulfillment of his wish of omnipresence if he didn't give up being a pirate and learned to fluently speak this masterpiece of cultural reflection (For politeness reasons, all of this is a joke. Respect Tom and his decisions)

[@user-is8dp3no8l]

_yes_

[@gaxamillion_]

- octuple for ‘pieces of eight’ as well!

[@andrewamann2821]

Make give the whole thing 2 different numbering systems, and make it base 7 for places, and octal for objects... Or, make the whole number counting in base 7, and the fractionals in base 8, just to melt the brains of any math people out there...

[@holdingpattern245]

how about base 6 and inclusive counting, or just base 8 so that 7 is the highest one-digit number

[@toothfairy10133]

@@andrewamann2821 math people here. this idea is awful i love it. you've inspired me ive gotta examine this counting system now. assuming we have decimals, too, it's a valid system by the real axioms, cause it's just notation, but what would make it interesting IS the decimals. we could fuck around and have everything after the decimal place in base 8 too, cause then it's still pieces of 8. that opens up a whole new thing of like, how does multiplication and division affect it? you wouldn't easily be able to do a simple left/right shift for multiplying/dividing by 7n OR 8n. main thing im wondering is if we actually have a one-to-one map between the number as written and its value. i don't THINK that's a problem, im pretty sure we do, but i would love to know. im not that experienced in number theory myself so i could be wrong but i genuinely think that this might be a valid number system.

[@abacussssss]

so immersive, i feel exactly like i've been stabbed in the throat

[@brightblackhole2442]

the units of measurement should be jan Misali's "seven C's": speed of light, calorie, middle C, degree celsius, candela, coulomb, and hundred

[@aformofmatter8913]

This doesn't even sound like pirate speak anymore, it's too far gone It sounds more like a drunk Lovecraftian cultist that started choking on a cherry pit in the middle of their dread summoning

[@robinheiborgstrand660]

"No, I'm not trying to speak Icelandic" Lmao Is this what Icelandic sounds like to you?

[@sal6695]

I actually started laughing out loud when you said "for situations beyond human comprehension"

[@water594]

A distant cousin of ultrafrench?🥵

[@jeranuspeedruns]

the question is - 'how will the language evolve?'

[@Ondohir]

Some vowels might get dropped to make longer consonant clusters. Also, I think a trial number might evolve since HyperPirate is lacking that. I wonder how the non-dual/trial number will be called then, other maybe? Any idea?

[@markmayonnaise1163]

One radical offshoot develops into its own language over around a millenium and a half eventually culminating in rapid diversification as it spreads to cover much of Asia and the entirety of Europe. That's right ladies and gentlemen, we are looking at the ancestor of the Proto-Indo-European language.

[@goddessoflesbians1153]

@@markmayonnaise1163 makes sense lol

[@holdingpattern245]

it evolved from santaa hence the "yohoho"

[@cassiopeiasfire6457]

i kept resisting acknowledging that this is a jokelang, because the orthography and presentation are so pretty. it is a joke, it's just a beautifully and elegantly told one. laughed my ass off, thank you for sharing.

[@1leon000]

11:18 Ah, I remember going to Hell the 8th time hearing Satan say something in that language, or a similar one, idk, it was a long time ago and I can't remember it accurately.

Ngl that’s genius, nguh-chan

[@mrelephant2283]

Nuxalk finally has a worthy opponent

[@the_linguist_ll]

Oh yeah? Meet Oowekyala. (It also has /d͡l/), a laterally released voiced alveolar stop.

[@DaEpikMan]

Oh god… OH LORD!

[@TSBoncompte]

oh man this is the first jokelang to actually make me laugh i love it

[@donvid8969]

This whole language is basically the sound Homer Simpson makes when he thinks of donuts

[@BaronVonScrub]

I got conlangs and esolangs mixed up for a second here; I was so ready to code like a pirate. Still, not disappointed. lol

[@sictoabu9611]

i'm glad to have roped the irls into this lmao

[@wigwagstudios2474]

im watching this at like 11 at night and i feel like ive been drugged at 4 am this is the most youtube video of all time there is nothing more than this

[@koko-rm7ew]

i’m watching this at 3 in the morning and feel about the same. like i’ve just stepped somewhere i shouldn’t have and noclipped out of reality

[@wigwagstudios2474]

do it with the santaa video it's even more hellish

[@mircos2530]

the perfect Conlang does not exist Hyperpirate:

[@GadolElohai]

O.M.G. I laughed so much, so much throughout this whole video. It took me like 45 min to watch it all. My throat hurts so much, and I actually was getting so dizzy I had to take a break. This is too much, it's so awful it's great!

[@NeroDefogger]

well it kinda sounds pirate, and it also sounds like a cat purring

[@LordJemse]

i am speechless. This is beauty, this is the future.

[@SuqDrIPA]

7:11 you almost gave me a heart attack

[@beansperkins]

Why does hyperpirate sound like Chewbacca with sleep apnea

[@Bealzabub]

I absolutely love how do to a speech impediment of mine that prevents me from rolling my R's I cannot speak this language 😂😂😂

[@koscheiivanovisch4540]

Damn man you're insane, This is the hardest I've laughed in the year, this language is so funny and great

[@floridianwolf1029]

It usually takes many months for this much suffering to manifest.

[@erdgerd9584]

mhh yes another conlang to teach to children

[@salumtheconlang2953]

arg

[@stephaniesmith7317]

I'm left with no choice. After attaching this stuffed parrot to my shoulder, I will undertake the addition of a meat hook to replace my severed hand.

[@watcher314159]

Okay. I want you to know that my language (which somehow isn't even a jokelang) has over 10,000 phonemes, has no vowels, and requires producing anywhere between 2 and 4 tonemes simultaneously every single syllable. Given that context... holy crap this language looks hard to pronounce.

[@watcher314159]

@Hayden the Toa It's a language for the Magna-Ge in The Elder Scrolls series (Skyrim et al). They exist outside of linear time, and so the language is completely without concatenative morphology or syntax because the very laws of physics of that sector of the multiverse disallow it; in essence, every syllable is pronounced in all possible orders simultaneously. The tones are a sort of coordinate system to locate each syllable in the parse tree and the massive phonology is to make up for the lack of combinatoric ability to create different sounds by rearranging the same set of sounds in different orders (there's a kind of agreement system that allows a sort of bastardization of a consonantal root system that helps a lot with that, but that itself multiplies the phonology) and to permit a functionally complex morphology (suprasegmental affixes and subordinate clauses are really the only grammatical tools available). It is technically human-pronounceable, albeit only by a grandmaster vocalist (I'm only up to three simultaneous pitches, and can't hit the notes (oh yeah it's technically a musical language) at all accurately, but then again I've only been learning the involved vocal techniques on-and-off for 2 years). It is not however human-learnable, since the atemporal syntax allows grammatical structures that aren't computable in our physics. Feel free to ask any further questions. I've left out a lot of utter insanity, like the embedded programming grammar or lack of like half a dozen other linguistic universals, but that at least is an outline of why the phonology is the way it is.

[@watcher314159]

@Hayden the Toa Okay. The 10,500 onsets are all analyzed as affricates with a lot of suprasegmentals. An acoustic phoneticist might go for a cluster analysis of only a couple hundred phonemes, but the phonology ties in so deeply with the morphosyntax that a cluster analysis is drastically less useful for understanding how the language as a whole actually works. Semantic information about the root is contained in the combination of the places of articulation of the plosive and fricative components of the onset. Both use the 11 places of articulation on the IPA chart forward of the pharynx (the pharynx/epiglottis and glottis being too busy with other things and not able to take near as many suprasegmentals, else they'd have been included too). The 5 basic clicks are also treated as places of articulation for the plosives (if only to keep my poor spreadsheets tidy, and because of how they work morphosyntactically), and "zero phonemes" are allowed (so, technically not affricates but rather straight plosives, clicks, or fricatives, but analysis gets weird; same number of phonemes either way you analyze it, but again it really helps with the spreadsheets to do it this way). Each affricate has 10 possible manners of articulation, which encode case on nouns and mood on verbs. These consist of every possible combination of voiceless, voiced, ejective, aspirated, and prenasalised. Aspirated ejectives are a harsh epiglottal workout btw. Grammatical number and definiteness are communicated by whether or not the onset is labialized, palatalized, palatalolabialized, pharyngealized, or pharyngeolabialized. Pharyngealization can allophonically vary to uvularization or velarization depending on where in the mouth there isn't already an articulation (/qʼx/ and similar onsets that occupy all three places are admittedly very tricky, in this case either gliding from velarization to pharyngealization or simply delaying the pharyngealization until the fricative component). The nucleus is prototypically an RTR retroflex lateral approximant, though allophonically it can be realized as an RTR close vowel or any of several other approximants in free variation. The retracted tongue root is the most important key, aside from some configuration of the tongue that divides the mouth into separate resonance chambers. The real meat and potatoes of the nucleus lies in the phonation, which can be modal, breathy, or creaky, as well as any combination of nasalized, rhotacized, or epiglottalized. There's also a second kind of nasalization independent of velum height: whether the lips are open or closed. These are assorted flags for various grammatical functions, like whether the root is to be treated as a noun or verb (determining in turn whether the manner of articulation of the onset marks case or mood) or numeral, different kinds of negation, and suchlike things mostly centered around derivation. Anyway, add another 48 phonemes. This is also, of course, where all the tones are. Start with a fundamental pitch on a 24 tone equal temperament scale, the higher the pitch the deeper down the parse tree (essentially, the more deeply nested the parentheses are). Then layer an overtone a particular interval above to distinguish between different clauses at the same depth. Then possibly layer a second overtone (the one part of the phonology I can't do yet) to help distinguish different branches in the tree. Then if epiglottalization is happening there will be a subharmonic tone an octave below the fundamental as well. There's no hard cap on the number of tonemes, but you can very easily expect the ability to produce 100,000-500,000 to be necessary for a conversation of significant length. Then finally there can be a coda, usually a trill, to mark other assorted miscellany, like certain pronominal things. Add another dozen or so phonemes here. The phonotactics are very restrictive in the sense that the onset, nucleus, and coda are completely non-overlapping, imposing a degree of linear order on the structure of the syllable not possible on any larger scale. Otherwise however, the rules are literally as loose as I could make them. Oh, and there's no stress or prosody, partly because physics, partly because the articulations are so delicate and complex that there's just no room in the vocal tract for such. Basically all that's left available is using volume for intonation. You may also have noticed that length is a kind of common phonemic contrast that is conspicuously absent, and as you've probably guessed that's mostly for physics reasons. Same with tone contours.

[@watcher314159]

@Hayden the Toa I don't even have it all typed out for myself. Hell, back when it only had 1800 consonants and still had vowels like 5 revisions ago I still never bothered typing out all the phonemes, because it's so much more efficient to just describe the space of all phonemes abstractly (in what would be a 175x60 table there's exactly 0 gaps so the chart isn't needed, unlike the IPA chart where the chart is actually necessary to show both the phones and gaps). My own notes actually have less detail than I just gave you in places, mostly because I'm just terribly organized and am bad at documenting changes in a central location.

[@watcher314159]

@Hayden the Toa The native orthography was originally going to be encoded on individual subatomic particles, but right now I'm in the process of trying to retool it for molecular structures instead, because if I can make that work it might possibly simplify things (though I must say it's not going well). Either way, the native system really can't be used in our physics for the same reason there are no words for directions. And that reason is that the number of spatial dimensions one is interacting with is almost never 3, and most of the "time" it's not even a whole number, and it needs to be equally legible in any number of dimensions. As for actual practical writing... Well, there's no way to do it "right" because every syllable in an utterance appears simultaneously in every possible ordering (or at least that's one way to conceptualize what's going on). But I can pick an ordering that's as valid as any other which is easy to read as necessary. As far as actually transcribing sounds goes... I just go with straightforward IPA, because it's not much harder to type than any other option (though it should be said that there's absolutely no easy way to write it, hence my unwillingness to provide examples) and it's the easiest to read. The tones I variously represent with musical notation (functional harmony on a computer, bar staves if writing analog) if I'm showing a "proper" jumbly mess, or if I group syllables by clause in something resembling a concatenative manner for legibility I can just use parentheses, because really that's all the tones are under the nonconcatenative hood.

[@StockhausenScores]

​@@watcher314159Is there a video?

[@olympiadeverre]

HyperPirate cover of The Pirates Who Don’t Do Anything when?

[@giorgiaolivotto8442]

In what kind of community did I just end up

[@AgmaSchwa]

The best one, welcome to our shadow realm.

[@giorgiaolivotto8442]

@@AgmaSchwa I was searching for an Icberg video on lingustics therories and here I am

[@Wizard_Pepsi]

11:45 This sounds like someone gargling a tiny amount of water while trying to trill

[@haydend.maniac227]

3:57 the syllabic consonants make me laugh

[@thething3372]

I first thought that the asterisks and whatnot were to indicate the amount of spitting and sputtering

Omg ayyeee aye 🤺🤺🤺

[@hephaestus8122]

This is so cursed.

[@hephaestus8122]

Nah, this is amazing. An amazing conlang made by an amazingly talented conlanger.

[@1leon000]

I'll go to the water and speak in this language.

[@Dracheneks]

Nguh.. buddy.. we need to talk..

[@ServantOfOdin]

Sounds like someone having trouble gargling with rum.....

[@thepointlessdude1919]

Im not even gonna try with this language. But i still like this

[@QBrute_]

So that is what the Murlocs are speaking!

[@anthonymarcelino8460]

When ya hav scurvy in ya voca cordz

[@isaacbruner65]

This is probably the most cursed thing I've ever seen

[@asabazinet5226]

Made it stone-faced through the first half till you were reading K'nuckles's transcription and you paused mid rhotic-cacophony to drop the least subtle [ɑ:a] and I lost it

[@devofficialchannel]

I never though I'd actually laugh so hard hearing you actually speak it.

[@DustyMasonJar]

Close your eyes when Agma lists the phonology, I dare you.

[@fabulouschild2005]

Cannae believe this was uploaded on my 16th birthday 😂

[@xarrison8274]

3:48 NAH BRUH HE GOT THE VILLAGER VOWELS

[@luciuscorneliusscipio9023]

i think my car might be a pirate

[@bloodystatic4156]

Hyperpirate kind of sounds like a llama trying to be a human!

[@Lazer-Star]

My throat hurts hearing people try to speak this

[@elsoldailla22]

As a spanish, I feel this language like the true english

[@pekka1903]

Yez

[@nydap5506]

I was thinking millions of tones

[@AgmaSchwa]

check out Santaa for that one, lol

[@welcometospace6091]

you sound like a purring cat 11:21

[@benny6675]

beautiful

[@netkv]

why does it sound like polish

[@connorsimpson5353]

How would you say, "I'm calling the police"? 👁👄👁

[@masicbemester]

*rhotic hell noises*

[@goddessoflesbians1153]

It's a general statement soooooo I'd say (to the best my keyboard would allow) rrrrrrrrrrr rrrrrrrr rrrrrrrrr rrrrrrrrrrrr

[@salamisandwich1558]

Bro added every r

[@littlegrell5223]

All I hear is dangerous animals - lovely

[@anastasiaklyuch2746]

Now I can understand what my dog is saying! It's a pirate!

[@Emery_Pallas]

It sounds like someone frothing at the mouth and dying

[@Feds_the_Freds]

Would be cool if some typical things pirates in movies usually say are part of the language. Like Arrr, Yarrr, Yarrharrharr and so on. I think, a higher amount of vowels would be needed for that. Also in general, more vowels would make it more like things, pirates would actually say.

[@emilyhelms-tippit4053]

I realize I'm a little late to the ameture linguistic anthropology scene, but I believe what you've unearthed is not, and indeed never was, spoken by pirates as described. This language was most often used by the people of Innsmouth, MA.

[@williamchamberlain2263]

Sounds like Cthulhu

[@joannasthings]

/o dios mio/

[@TheWeirdSonicFan]

This sounds more like someone is snoring, bruh. 💀💀💀

[@pentelegomenon1175]

I wonder if the sounds are even discernible from each other, like could someone actually understand this language at all just from hearing it? You may have gone a little overboard with this language, ironically.

[@isaacbruner65]

There's no way these sounds are discernible from each other. I dont think there is any language on Earth that distinguishes more than three rhotics.

[@GRAV3StON3]

It sounds like when you spam a bunch of letters and have a text to speech voice say it

[@8-bitfox716]

I SHALL FIX WHAT YOU HAVE DONE

[@klawiehr]

You had no reason to starve this language of vowels...and yet, here we arr

[@livedandletdie]

Yer now, this is about as cursed as Ithkuil is information dense. Or about as cursed as I hate toki pona.

[@arbitrario3845]

don't worry you can just use a "whatever rhotic"

[@kweeshaatekneepunam2507]

Grapefruit-eese

[@kweeshaatekneepunam2507]

6:41

[@siyeel7577]

I think this is just French...

[@r4_in_space]

The writing system actually looks very stylish. The phonetics are weird though.

[@michaeldavis9190]

I have a question. Where does "Angma" come from? I know what a schwa is, that makes sense to me, but the letter before it is eng, so I'm confused.

[@avtomaticeskijrazdatcikgus2713]

Agma is also a name for the ŋ (both the sound and the letter). It comes from the Greek "ἆγμα", which means "fragment".

[@barnumeffekt]

12:19 /ŋɚː/

[@barnumeffekt]

or is it /nɚː/? i’m not sure

[@n3ishere]

6:15 is me :swag:

[@jangamecuber]

:swag:

[@foogod4237]

I'm pretty sure I have a better name for your language: "Wookie Hairball"

[@luknotshiphile]

What the hell have you created

[@notbaconzzzzzzz]

The language sounds like they're drowning.

[@hephaestus8122]

For ɹ, what is that symbol in the orthography?

[@AgmaSchwa]

I dont know if this is even going to copy and paste properly, but it’s ꞃ, Ꞃ

[@hephaestus8122]

@@AgmaSchwa I never thought that a KZbinr would ever respond to one of my comments, I have gone so far. But I was more meaning where you may have gone it? Because the symbol won’t show up in your comment and I can’t copy your comment text for some reason. But thanks for commenting!

[@playdoughmaster808]

Wheres the dictionary

[@AgmaSchwa]

www.nguh.org/languages/hyperpirate

[@playdoughmaster808]

@@AgmaSchwa thanks

[@thewrongsorcerer]

video starts at 1:54, watch at 1.25x speed