An Insult To The Galaxy | 2411 | Short HFY Sci-Fi with @AgroSquerril

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{TimeStamps}
00:00 Intro
00:07 An Insult To The Galaxy by FarmWhich4275
#ScienceFiction #Storytime #scifi
Music Tracks From KZbin Audio Library:
URL Melt - Unicorn Heads
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Podcast is Called : ASN Humans Are Space Orcs , HFY and other stories
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This Story is Classified as HFY or Humanity Feck, Yea , but what does the Mean?
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HFY is a story/series that takes a “human element” in either humanity or an “other” (race/species or object) that exists in a “setting” (future or other world/universe) with varying levels of culture, technology, society and history that help show in some shape or form the potential good or bad for humanity’s race/culture. In These stories Humans are often referred to as Human, Humanity, Deathworlder, Hellwolder in reference to the human planet of origin , Earth. This planet is seen by most of the universe as a place where only death and chaos can survive.
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Taken from the FAQ of the r/HFY subreddit.
Humans Are Space Orcs (HASO) or Humans Are (Fantasy Race) Are used as a guide when writing.
In these Stories we normally View humans like the other races view orcs in a Fantasy Novel. We (Humans) share the same characteristics and personalities as orcs. Humans are normally treated as the outsiders and barbarians. Humans tend to be underestimated as well in these stories. Unlike Humanity Feck Yea , these don't always put a positive spin on humans\humanity sometimes looking at the darker side of human and humanity from the perspective of aliens.
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[@valtiel2589]

Than you for narrating my silliest scribbling ever :)

[@oldbutnotdead1]

Thank you for writing it. It was a lot of fun!

[@TheJtjensen]

One of the best.

[@siwlasilva]

Lovely little piece, thank you for shharing! 🌻

[@RiversJ]

Krogan spirit in there for sure 😊 Lovely story thanks!

[@johnnyrotten3175]

All I can say is please continue to scribble 😎

[@anathardayaldar]

"They phased into the wrong universe." Meanwhile in the Cthulhu dimension: FRESH MEAT!!!

[@ombrepourpre7562]

Or W40K universe "xenos scum" 🤬☠️

[@ravenouself4181]

Cthulhu: Wait, You wanted to conquer Earth? *evil chuckle* Oh, You poor, poor fools. Xenos: Pardon? Cthulhu: Not only is Earth of great interest of me and my siblings, but we had a little deal with Humanity, they helped our followers in a war and we granted them godlike abilities in return. Xenos: What!? Cthulhu: I mean, we made it so most of them forgot all about it, but from time to time... an individual that does wield the power is born. For example, the one they call Chuck Norris. You were very lucky to not run into him. Through, luck is relative, as You did end up in our hands.

[@-zawzaw-8897]

@@ravenouself4181 damn, you have one hell of an imagination !! BUT, i like it...

[@Shinzann2007]

As a friend of mine once told me, "Courtesy costs you nothing."

[@achimdemus-holzhaeuser1233]

And gains so much. One of the most underrated wisdoms

[@rembrandtshadows]

and words are like arrows, once shot they can not be taken back

[@mordenwyldanebonbolt8729]

Courtesy costs you patience; this is why so many have such trouble with it. Practice increases one's efficiency. Too many still don't want to expend the effort, not realizing the return far exceeds the outlay.

[@Robertlynschultz]

Humanity perfected Sun Zu’s greatest lesson… “The Greatest [sweetest] Victory is one that Requires No Battle”

[@anathardayaldar]

Xeno: "I am Kak of the Raks. And you will surrendur to our overwhelming fleet!" Human: Your Raks species no longer exists. Next. Xeno: "How dare you! I am Tong of the Qongs and YOU will surrendur to MY overwhelming fleet." Human: Your Qongs no longer exists. Next. Xeno: "uhm... I am Meng of the Hengs. Uh, please ignore my war fleet. We just came to open trade negotiations." Human: Cool. Customs office is over there. One of our diplomats wlll be over shortly.

[@larrythompson8630]

Yep played that right. Even when he thought not being noticed he tried to avoid getting in way. Found a quiet spot, asked, offered to move if in wrong place, said he would leave if not wanted. Plus the radio message. How could you not respond to that? At start the tourist junk seemed feeble. But he explained why.

[@artyd42]

The ultimate method of dealing with bullies. Just ignore them to the point where even if they get angry and attack they hit... nothing. I can see exactly why this was crazy enough to work.

[@z3r0t0l3r4ns]

Exactly. If the bully can't hurt you or get a rise out of you they will get bored quickly.

[@MrGoesBoom]

@@z3r0t0l3r4ns Teachers in schools use that thinking all the time. And it's dead wrong, it'll just make them step up their attempts and/or get others in on it. The only people who think like that were never bullied themselves. Just as useless as the advice of "It takes two to fight, just walk away" cause that doesn't work either, it's just turning your back on someone hostile.

[@Shadow.Dragon]

Great story; Excellent narration! As the old saying goes... "You catch more flies with honey than vinegar!" LOL!!!

[@bobdrooples]

But you can actually catch wasps with vinegar...not sure how that helps (well, it's a good tip for summer in keeping wasp numbers down if you put vinegar in a modified 2L Coke bottle wasp trap). But I'm not sure how it impacts the pathos of the allegorical flies and honey.

[@damagar8]

Yes but why would someone want a bunch of flies?

[@jasonsamilton1659]

​@@damagar8 maggot therapy? 🤷🏾‍♂️

[@achimdemus-holzhaeuser1233]

also fruit flies.

[@jasonsamilton1659]

@@bobdrooples also add dawn dish soap so they drown

[@chrisreadwells]

Feels like it could be a series, nice starting premise.

[@MattieAMiller]

An Alien shopkeeper's diary on New Hawaii. Sounds like something I would love.

[@Kualinar]

Politeness and respect wins the day. Music seals the deal.

[@dalemorgan8263]

I thought this was going in a very different direction when I heard "New Hawaii." Thought we were gonna have a "Here comes the sun" moment.

[@sintanan469]

Nah, the alien bullies weren't able to touch the boats.

[@TheLastGarou]

My thought exactly: "DON'T touch the boats!"

[@brianjuergensmeyer8809]

For the algorithm! "Be polite! Until it's time to NOT be polite!" Good to see you're doing well, sir!

[@babomberman]

For the algorithm. These stories help me get through the work day by keeping the ADHD part of my brain entertained while i work.

[@wesdavis8018]

I've been a salesman by trade for most of my life. This story is on the money. One of the keys to success is learing to say "please & thank you" and the liberal application of "Sirs, Ma'am, & honorific titles"...

[@JamesSavik]

LOL Blue space elves

[@ICountFrom0]

I love the idea that we'd just... Walkaway.

[@Snipergoat1]

Particularly nice considering the military applications of tech like that would make ships nigh invincible and defenses useless against our weapons. Despite this there was no show of force or any type of dick measuring. Instead we were just annoyed (probably having ran into a civilization or two before, who were equally dickish). Likely having already eliminated one or two such hostile empires we decided that it was likely that everyone were dicks and that there was really no point in destroying every one of them thus making us truly alone. Instead we installed some defenses and once protected. Just sighed when yet another set of dicks appeared, turned on the defense and went about their business, some what annoyed that yet another set of jerks are out there and reinforcing the idea that they are all jerks.

[@beingsneaky]

indeed, being polite always has a better chance of opening doors.

[@trevorthieme5157]

If humanity wanted to win that war by killing all they needed to do was phase all of their stars out or better yet phase out half of their planets temporarily.

[@merlinathrawes746]

Yes, please, thank you, you're welcome and asking (not demanding) permission will go a long way. Politeness smooths over many minor mistakes.

[@seanbolster7603]

Saw "new hawaii"... knew shtf.

[@inventiveowl395]

As a certain overweight electrician would say: "Don't touch our damn boats!"

[@dalemorgan8263]

_Here comes the sun_

[@bobburris4445]

Yeetus deeletus!

[@johnnyrotten3175]

👏👏👏👏👏 Outstandingly endearing and entertaining story 😁 Greatly enjoyed it, and of course the 🐿️ was his ever exceptional self 💯 Keeping your health in our 🙏 🐿️

[@lupaswolfshead9971]

bet that hurt lol helps to open the door first before walking through.

[@smiley3012]

The last two stories have put a smile on me. Thanks

[@leightondoswell453]

Awsome sauce that! Congratulations to the author and thank you argo for a great narration

[@oldbutnotdead1]

This made me smile, thanks!

[@imweakfordeaky]

Ha ! - “Bohemian Rhapsody” seals the deal again ! Freddie Mercury would be delighted

[@td6647]

Give yourself a pat on the back Agro! You did a great and humorous job narrating and picked a story that should prove to the rest of the authors that you don't need to cram an entire dictionary complete with thesaurus down the audiences ear holes to make a great story! Too many of these authors out there seem to be trying to prove to everybody how dictionary intelligent they are when in reality they're just boring the crap out of well, me anyway. Please keep up the good work, thank you!😊

[@ianharrison5758]

I totally get you. Hfy tends to overindulge in explanations to the point it can go well past necessary or prudent detail and context into long winded technobabble or a whole page of the same philosophical concept or idea explained over and over to hammer the “humans are different” angle.

[@paulhartman5683]

Great story! A bit of politeness does go a long way to improving relationships.

[@jeanannd]

Being polite is always a good way to start relations.

[@badbob1066]

Politeness can go a long way

[@WingManFang1]

Nope this doesn’t sound like us…..maybe some trolls, but to many of us are down to clown with some aliens yow!……. Ok that ending makes much more sense.

[@ufoe20011]

For da skwerl For the rythm that is algo For the attack CATAPILIARS

[@lightneko]

Reminds me of when they did that in Stargate.😂

[@SpiritWolf1966]

I enjoy all of Agro Squirrel Narrates videos 😅

[@phoboskittym8500]

You just have to be nice and have cool stuff.

[@InternetGravedigger]

Simple politeness opens a LOT of doors!

[@MrGoesBoom]

Heh, everyone else was all thinking conquest...this guy was just polite and tried trade. Wonder how many others would be smacking their heads ( or the equivalent ) for not thinking of it first.

[@mordenwyldanebonbolt8729]

Kind of forgotten at the beginning, but the first-contact species had no problem whatsoever. Kind of a big clue. All the warmongers need a liberal application of the Clue-by-four.

[@ArronRatliff]

Well done Agro. Please accept this like and comment for your outstanding reading of one of my favorite newer HFY stories.

[@michaelyoung7261]

For the Narrator!!! For the Author!! For the Squirrel Crew! For the algorithm.

[@christopheroconnor1745]

your the only person i can listen to read these no idea why but thanks

[@andtorres4]

I loved this story. So … human

[@Wishedon]

You are soooo good👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽 Fabulous ❣️ Stories WONDERFUL too❣️❣️ Now becuz handsome man is visual in thumbnail others will be drawn faster quicker to listen to the richness, eloquence and thrilling story telling as well👏🏽👏🏽

[@dborjal007]

hello and I enjoyed today's reading

[@mattbrown5511]

That is going to be one very rich merchant.

[@madi4642]

The worst or best part of this, is that you dont need to hide where you are building your next weapon of destruction, you can do it where everyone can see and juste let them see what comming😂😂😂

[@ejensen101]

Oh man this made me all sorts of giddy and smiling at the end of it for the merchant alien.

[@RealArcalian]

Greetings, Mentlegent! For the Rhyhtm that is Algo All they had to do is ask nicely.

[@johnnyrotten3175]

4 D 🐿️ ❗❗ 4 D author ❗ 4 D algorithm

[@Jakes3130]

Thanks for the narration. And God bless

[@ianharrison5758]

Idk if this blue elf truly this, but simply by being the first one who cared enough to clear the incredibly low bar of asking Nicely, that he has secured his species future. Others will likely follow his example once they get the idea that please and thank you have more power than any weapon with humans around, but we won’t forget the first to actually want to be friends, the fact he opened with that is a big plus on my end as well. I wouldn’t be surprised if they were our closest alliance given how much we don’t want to be alone in the universe.

[@MidnightSmoke]

yep, being polite is always a good idea. Here is a like and comment for the story, for entertaining me, to help your channel grow, to appease the great and powerful KZbin algorithm demon, and get you the recognition you deserve.

[@peteratkin3788]

Truly enjoyable, thank you

[@barelyasurvivor1257]

Great reading of a great story. Once again you show how far AI Generated or AI read stories have to go before they are worth anything. The Squirrel does it again.

[@bennood2031]

I like that, entire universe involved in a dong measuring contest; humans make contact with the polite guy who just wants to trade.

[@Lsr2380]

i love listening to you bro.

[@eyllyssaunders5345]

I love this story thank you

[@Terran.Marine.2]

4 da AL GORE RHYTHM! (does that guy dance?)

[@alistairwolfe6644]

Loved it thank-you made my night.

[@victortahlor4038]

Thank you for the reading

[@Inufan2005]

Basic Courtesy can do wonders.

[@deussalt4479]

For the Agro-rythm!

[@pandablair4226]

I love this story

[@Ryu_D]

Thank you for the video.

[@nigelsmith7366]

For the Squirrel

[@inventiveowl395]

This one is really good! Love it :D

[@camerongoodwin4002]

For the algorithm 😀

[@rickkeimig993]

Great story, love your voice, for the algorithm

[@pauldockins9635]

Enjoyed thank you ❤

[@ombrepourpre7562]

Yeeeah... 🤔 Be polite can take you far. But the sentence lack its end "and carry a big gun". Be polite, but weak is the better way to be abused, and taken advantage by humans. Like our history prove it so strongly 😢 Fun little story ❤ Alway incredible how you give it life.

[@theshadyprotector8412]

Thank you.

[@victortahlor4038]

Manners are what keeps us civilized

[@Maeshalanadae]

Just be friendly, it’s good.

[@floydthomason692]

as usual you did excellent😃

[@allenmorgan1007]

For the Algorithm, for the Author(s), for the Holographic Voice!

[@gordonhardwick9552]

One of your best

[@dennisallen4726]

Momma always said you catch more with honey

[@cmdr_thrudd]

Hehe that was amusing

[@Alex.H.B.1970something]

Bravo Sir Encore Etc

[@merlinwizard1000]

6th, 30 May 2024

[@Michael_Brock]

Farmwhich always good.😊

[@foogee5403]

love the "you're the first one to ask nicely" kind of stories

[@JRRodriguez-nu7po]

Alternative name for the story: the MGTOW strategy.

[@enriquehirshfeltikov2395]

We just need a farmwhich playlist/RPG setting.

[@GR3YD3ATH]

😂😂😂

[@TheRealInscrutable]

200K

[@donniejo8888]

Bosss was Right, set it all up then trade Properly

[@mikeharris6429]

Should have just phased the planets out from all the Xenos in the galaxy. Let them all die in space and then take over their planets.

[@deus0rcinus889]

That one sounds like the start of an interesting story. I need to know if there is more to read??

[@milkyblast247]

Yo

[@LMinem]

i liked this story. i generally like anything you read. Always much better than those AI voices.

[@earmunchermuncher7639]

Fta

[@dantupper1784]

Manners getting rewarded??? This story could go places- outsider thru being nice explores & trades in the phase-shifted humanverse???

[@archer_of_azure]

Survivor becomes a dungeon continues when?

[@valtiel2589]

when agro's health is in better order.

[@TheRealInscrutable]

Was this story an excuse to say/write *bugger* as often as possible?

[@justsomeguywithahandlebarm2456]

Йбкхгgg

[@vegasicebabe]

That sounds an awful lot like what Perry Rohdan did for just the Earth.

[@victortahlor4038]

Thank you for the reading