Alayna Accidentally Joined An MLM | Chosen Family Podcast

[@marybennet9403]

I used to get mail from the scientologists for MONTHS and For the Funny I used a return envelope to send them a crayon picture of L Ron Hubbard (no words, just the portrait) and they took my address off their list IMMEDIATELY. Never got another mailer again.😂

[@themorales6]

Alayna: “You look like you shouldn’t go near a school.” “You look like you’re gonna catch ‘em all.” 😂😂😂😂

[@MochaBloke]

My favorite trend over the course of this podcast is Alayna gradually feeling more comfortable teasing Ashley right back. It's so much fun.

[@belladan]

Forget about worms, "Would you still love me if I were a cactus?" is THE question from now on - and Jen literally LIVED it and PASSED the test with freaking FLYING COLORS

[@salomeraiszadeh8071]

Mak has gotten funnier, I was laughing at all of her little one-liners this episode

[@acountrycalledsunshine]

Mak talking about stray cats is the most adorable thing on the internet today.

[@ayla1316]

This podcast is part of my weekly ritual. I am knee deep in post adoption depression (2ish years ago it was over my head and I was drowning in it, so hey progress) It came out in therapy one day that I hadn't laughed, like truly something is funny and joyful laughed, in a little over a year. The algorithm was listening, as always, and sent Alayna reacting to good thirst traps, which led to her interview on the podcast that shan't be named, and then you all started chosen family. I watch/listen every Wednesday morning on my way to town. Wednesday is my only day without my kids, it is my day. And I start it every week with laughter and joy thanks to you all. 💜💜💜 Disclaimer: yes I love my children. They were adopted through foster care and have an absolute nightmare past, and all the trauma and behaviors that come with that, so parenting them is life on extra hard mode and I wasn't aware of all the trauma it was going to re-trigger in myself. Yes, I'm in therapy and will continue to be for the foreseeable future.

[@homoromoacecase97]

Sending well wishes to you and your family 🤗

[@preciousonejewel]

Alayna don't tell me about the ring fizz bombs. I was so deep in the jewelry candle/ bath bomb world for years 😂 worst part is I don't have a bathtub and also I'm allergic to candles

[@Raddiebaddie]

That’s amazing 😂😂

[@nicolebacon2747]

I used to have a job manufacturing and packaging bath bombs and other scented bath products (soaps, shampoos, candles, deodorants, etc.). The bath bomb powder gets everywhere. I had a ~15 minute drive home everyday and the powder would get all over the seat so the car would smell like a combination of all the scents... I'm also allergic to most scented products lol

[@mrjr03]

🤣🤣🤣

[@mariannetfinches]

Mak needs to go volunteer at the shelter. They often need people to socialise the kittens, which sounds like a tough job but someone has to do it

[@kapowjam3462]

Dying at the people walking behind Ashley as she talked about picking up a cactus 🌵😂😂😂

[@RowanWolf22]

I would really like a clip of Ash telling me to get out of bed, to set as my alarm ringtone 🤣 I think that would be hilarious!

[@angheldoza6613]

currently listening to this episode on the train and just burst out laughing when ashley said FIZZY BOMB MOMS YOU NEED TO STOP 💀 dear god LMAO

[@frances8397]

about the "you have time"/phone use thing: it's not always that we don't have the time, but rather we don't have the "space"/effort capacity/energy to prioritise it. even if it's a small action, just knowing it's one more thing on your to-do list can add mental pressure. even if it's something that would probably improve your mental space in the long run, i think it's alright to choose not to put that pressure on yourself to do more wellness things, if you don't feel like it currently fits with your life. (my rituals are journaling a little almost every night and always writing down atleast 5 things i appreciated today, no matter how shit i feel)

[@BartholomewAwakened]

My ritual: I avoid my phone for 20 minutes to an hour after I wake up. Meditate for at least 5 minutes and I write down my dreams if I remember them. I also journal at night - particularly something that tends to be emotionally charged- and I try to write it from a neutral perspective.

[@AW-tv6nq]

These sound like great practices. In your neutral perspective journaling, do you write in third person? Or simply first person without any strong emotions?

[@BartholomewAwakened]

@@AW-tv6nq thanks. I see it as writing from third person perspective though I’m writing in the first person. It has me be more compassionate with myself while detaching myself from the issues. As if I’m speaking about a loved one that I want to help heal and hold space for. I listen to them from a loving space.

[@aquamarine3699]

That’s so fascinating!! I’m definitely gonna try that thanks!

[@BartholomewAwakened]

@@aquamarine3699 🙌 its honestly the best thing I’ve tried so far. I’ve only been doing this for a couple of months and my mind feels so much clearer. I’m able to just hear the thoughts in my mind and not judge them or believe that they define me. I’m finding that when I allow myself to have the thoughts no matter what, those thoughts are less likely to return or be persistent. It’s pretty amazing to know the thoughts don’t need to be true or real, they just need to be heard. Seriously awesome. I do hope you give it a try 🤗

[@MaddieMadMoo1]

As a Brit who used to play competitive cricket, I totally cannot get over how cute Ashley looks in that hat, she is giving me cricket umpire vibes and I am so here for it.

[@nicolebacon2747]

Her hat reminds me of Madeline Sami' impression of a cricket player in Taskmaster NZ

[@MaddieMadMoo1]

@@nicolebacon2747 I agree it definitely does

[@kyoooooooooooooon]

​@@nicolebacon2747 i gotta say i was not expecting taskmaster nz to be mentioned in this comment section

[@WhatsupAiden]

Listening to this is indeed my wednesday ritual.

[@eyeseajujubee]

This episode was hilarious! “Don’t say that if you want to make a sale” Mak 😂 “I picked up a cactus and that was a mistake” 😂 My Wednesday routine involves climbing early in the morning, then listening to the podcast while making breakfast, then meditation for 10 minutes before work.

[@audreyr5938]

Alayna not being able to say that an MLM is selling a shitty product is sooo funny. Like all an MLM is trying to do is convince you to buy a bad product.

[@theembersinside1420]

This was one of the funniest episodes! I can just imagine Alayna as the queen of the Fizzy Bomb Mom's! 😂 She'd be perfect for that. Motivated, encouraging & a smile u can trust.. LOL

[@Neveko]

Some of my rituals: Daily rituals -Walk my dog every morning, even when it's cold. Our route is 10 minutes -Make my bed and open my curtains every morning. It is time to wake up, my day is started -Wash my face every night. I focus on the soap and water cleaning my day off my face General ritual: -I light a collection of candles around my room with some long wooden matches when I sit down to read. It helps encourage me to sit and enjoy silence and focus on my reading. The candles keep me from giving up on reading and doing something else because it takes so long to light half a dozen candles with my long matches I'm not going to just extinguish them and do something else

[@nobarbie8748]

I really struggle with keeping routines because I am unemployed and without real purpose rn tbh. Big part of it is making tea in the mornings and yes actually listening to this podcast while doing the dishes and eating breakfast. Takes me out of my own head at least for a nice little while. Thank you guys!

[@circleofleaves2676]

"I'm so dry! I'm so dry!" screams the fizzy-bomb without water.

[@lexiisgay]

I totally relate to finding 20 dollars in random places! One time I found a 2 year old check that was still good for $250 that I completely forgot about 🤣 gotta love dissociative amnesia

[@ribonichigo]

for completely different reasons I too almost got roped into an MLM Alayna. Just after high school I was struggling financially and got a letter about how if you worked at this office job you'd make $15/hour (I was making ($9/hour at the time so this was huge). I signed up for the interview meeting, sent my application, and arrived at the office. It was Cutco (a knife selling MLM). Spent the entire time telling us about profit margins based on sales. I eventually was like "wait a second, the flier said $15/hour" and they were like "oh it's $15 per meeting (sit down with a client and sell them knives), and each meeting is about an hour". Yeah no. They told me I was hired shortly after and that my resume was "AMAZING" (I literally had only ever worked at a grocery store). And said their next seminar to discuss how to get your knife set for selling would be next week. I did not not go to the seminar. They emailed me asking where I was, I never replied, and they never contacted me again.

[@jessjrz]

The biggest cash I've found going around my house was 200 bucks, and honestly is my best way of saving money 😭

[@aliviafletcher8926]

29:30 HAS ME DEAD

[@sarahallegra6239]

My gratitude ritual: I think of three general things I’m thankful for, three things about my partner/other people I’m grateful for, and (most challenging for me), three things about myself that I’m grateful for.

[@ellas1755]

I NEED an audio of Ashley yelling at me to get up

[@ninreck5121]

ashley should start an MLM of her selling alarm sounds like you can have Ashley shouting "get out of bed you piece of shit" over and over again as your alarm on your phone

[@nadine.villalba]

watching chosen family podcast on wednesdays has become a ritual

[@swiftie4856]

The vibes of today were absolutely fantastic in every way. “Full of these fucking ring bombs” while giggling is the most Alayna thing I’ve heard and I have no idea why

[@cariiinen]

We all need some Ashley yelling to get out of the house in the morning!

[@yasman7609]

when i wake up the first thing i do is give my grandma a hug :) gives me a big feeling of gratitude. appreciate your loved ones!

[@cassiewatson3870]

This was the funniest episode. I really enjoy when you guys let your hair down and let loose. This was OUTSTANDING. And yes, you are my current ritual. Since the show has been on KZbin and the episodes come out on Wednesday mornings. I try to catch at work because I work nights or when I get home before I fall asleep. So thank you for making my day better and understanding the LGBTQ+ community. Have a Wonderful Day.❤❤❤

[@lilyrouge3325]

Whenever I end the day on a good note, I put on Chosen Family and just have a fucking great laugh while coloring in my coloring book with some ginger tea. That’s my ritual. 💖

[@Ky_The_Weird]

My sister gave me one of her coats when I was younger when she got too big for it and I found a 20 dollar bill in its zipped up pocket...didn't tell her about it and I used the money on candy lol

[@IzzyTheLittlestJeep]

Now they know the truth. If Ashley ever vanishes we know. We know. Also imagine your alarm every morning “Wake up .. I said get up you lazy bottom piece of 💩!” 😂

[@circleofleaves2676]

What was for dinner? A cactus?

[@RakshadaShirley]

Prickly pear cactus and a fizzy drink.

[@parmisvazifeh140]

Well guess college assignments and exams can wait for a whole hour...

[@Soph-561]

Why did I scream when I saw the notification 😂 lol

[@nena7316]

i love watching this pod always right before my therapy appt Wednesday morning hahaha

[@turbo.msm.]

finding a stray bill of any denomination in a pocket goes so hard

[@raineyautumn6149]

On this podcast being a routine/ritual- when I would eat lunch by myself at school I would go to my car and put this on and it's like I'm talking with friends

[@kristinaernst4517]

so excited for this bc I also accidentally joined an MLM at one point

[@elliliveswhere]

Please do tell 🍿

[@laurenfredericks7463]

YES I WANT ASHLEY YELLING CLIPS PLEASE

[@deanamon5070]

I just realised i have many daily rituals🤔 start and finish my day with meditation, read a chapter of a book, make up a stupid reason for getting out of my apartment, and walk some miles. And watching Chosen Family podcast at least once a week, of course 👌 my fav ritual

[@canadianicedragon2412]

I don't know that it is a ritual, but listening to you 3 on Wednesday is part of my life. And generally makes me smile so I'd say it improves my life in little ways.

[@emmaanastasi6140]

This is 100% my Wednesday morning ritual. It’s the first recommended video on KZbin for me every week ❤

[@rhaelity]

My ritual that helps me balance out is turning on some songs that I can really get into and then sing/dance around the apartment any way I want to. Weeeeeeeeee! 🎉

[@haleywho17]

i relate to mak about the stray cat. we’ve had one for 10 years and we got him fixed a few years ago. before he was fixed we could never get near him but now he lets us get so close and lives on our back porch now. i love him so much and he’s also missing half of his front paw. use a raccoon trap!!!

[@annaedvalson2793]

Mak getting the tingles when Alayna called her “babe” 😏

[@tambob82]

Alayna, I underestimated you. You're a secret menace savage!!🤌

[@sam2633]

also mak saying ashley's kinda funny 😂💀

[@claraboe2755]

This is kind of like a ritual for me. I listen to the podcast (or to the other podcast that should not be named) and cook and its great because it lights up my mood while im doing my cooking (which i see as self-care as well). Otherwise my morning ritual is looking at my phone for way too long instead of vetting out of bed and then feeling bad about it…

[@Name-ui9oc]

I know the abbreviation mlm only as ‘men loving men’. I was sooo confused by the title.... how did Alayna join them? Accidentally?

[@kapowjam3462]

I thought the same thing at first!

[@Raddiebaddie]

Amazing hahaa it’s a “Multi-level marketing” scheme 😂

[@borderlined87]

For me, skincare is a ritual. There are certain things I do every night that help set me up for a restful night. And if ever I'm feeling harried or off during the day, a quick face wash and moisturizing session always helps me to reconnect and reset.

[@urdelicatepov]

omfg when mak mentioned that maybe some people's rituals are listening to the pod i was like "ah you beat me to it!" i was literally going to comment that when i'd finished the episode! my ritual is: every wednesday afternoon, i get home from school and i go on a walk by the sea and listen to the pod! i'm in my final year in school and i'm always pretty stressed so the walk really helps me clear my head, which then puts me in a better mindset to study when i get home. i absolutely love the podcast and find i can get through the school day easier bc i have my walk afterwards to look forward to, so thank you guys x

[@marybethmatterfis4560]

I Love finding stray cash in my pockets, bags or house! When I was a teenager (like most) on payday you would go and party and blow most of you cash. Trick I started doing when I would stumble in at the end of the night. I would hide what ever cash I had left in various spots in my bedroom. I would of course forget where I put it, and then would eventually come across it at a later date. This also had the added benefit of making me clean my room more often to find money!

[@reesereese4024]

i love maks hair in this episode its giving shane vibes!

[@sleepwalkinmoon]

this podcast is DEF part of my routine! every night i watch this

[@Mariethechaotic]

I'm watching this after watching the Smosh Funeral Roast so parts of this just felt like a continuation.

[@leenotnelson]

my ritual is that every wednesday morning i turn on your podcast and contemplate my life choices

[@gabriellagreer-benedict9476]

You had me at the hand clap FIZZY BOMB MOMS!

[@juliapritt5487]

I usually pull up the podcast while I update my planner before getting into work stuff. Ya'll contribute to my cozy little routine frfr

[@ktkrogstad]

I’m not religious but I have kept some meaningful holiday rituals. I’m housebound with a severe disability (ME), so I can’t attend / host group things anymore, but I still do a couple things every Christmas / holiday season. I still think it’s a nice chance once a year to send out cards with pictures and a little note to the people in my life. I usually opt for botanical / winter-themed cards with blank insides, so it’s more of a winter greeting than an actual Christmas card. I also really enjoy gift-giving, even throughout the year. The holidays are a good time to share my sewing projects and things with others, so I usually sew some tote bags, hand warmers, and rice heating pads to give to my family (they come for individual visits). I also make my own hot chocolate mixes and give them away in old spice jars and containers. As for more regular rituals, I have ADHD so I keep it really flexible for myself, so I don’t feel guilty if it doesn’t happen every day. But I bought a tea advent calendar this year (which was just a box of 24 tea bags lol). I find making space at some point in my day to pick out a tea and brew a cup and sip on it is so helpful in grounding me. It often inspires me to just be present with the cup and the sipping, and I often end up journaling during or after the cup. Very helpful and easy for anyone to do. And I like that the box was a variety pack, so I can pick a different tea depending on my mood or the time of day. I also was too sick to even brush my teeth for a year when I was at my worst (bedbound most of the time), so now every night when I brush my teeth, I look in the mirror and give myself a little smile for doing that small act for myself. It’s small but it’s a nice little ritual and gives me a sense of accomplishment.

[@kaiya33123]

HIGHLIGHT of my week😁😁🥰🥰🥰

[@feathergirl5343]

listening to podcasts is part of my cleaning ritual! and yours is one of my favorites! (actually most listened to this year according to spotify wrapped) I am really bad at staying focused while cleaning and tidying but i know it essential to my wellbeing and having you guys in my ears makes me feel supported by friends! thank you chosen family ❤❤

[@aquamarine3699]

Such a smart idea!!

[@Sophial1111]

I love drinking my coffee/tea and painting in the morning. And sleep ASMR at night lol

[@maryschmidt7715]

listening to this podcast is part of my wednesday morning routine

[@janasheffield2230]

I though MLM meant "men loving men" and I was like, "In what way did Alayna...'join'?"

[@Remytheabsoluterat]

This podcast is single handedly keeping me going through studying for finals, thank you guys so much for always being so fun and conversational and it's all that's keeping me sane rn

[@kaliichick87]

Love how mac was down to buy with the lil bit info lol

[@candacelemay5057]

"You piece of shit" Alayna is slowly becoming Ashley 😂

[@kelli_o]

this podcast is always my motivation to go for walks. I always save them for when I know I need to get outdoors during the week :)

[@lyndseyglasko5571]

I love making my skin care part of my ritual each morning and night. It makes me feel pampered and my skin has benefited so much from actually taking care of it. I never thought I'd be a skin care girlie but it is so worth it.

[@jennrichards7169]

Alayna, if you’re the new MLM Queen, can we change your online handle to “Fizzy-Joy”!???😂😂😂😂😂❤

[@a.sawyer8751]

Aw the ending:) listening to this during my mornings!

[@rosiedurrant4365]

I assume we will see the fizz rings in the Chosen Family Merch soon?

[@Talismaniac77]

It's a Gilligan hat from Gilligan's Island, Ashley. Now you can show Gilligan's Island to Mak and Alayna.

[@Talismaniac77]

Young cats can be trained out of feral, but most outdoor strays are at risk for feline leukemia, feline Aids, etc. And Ashley, cactus spines burrow at every movement. Be careful.

[@MitzyCat]

LoLoooL You nailed it Gilligan Dad

[@geebee3148]

I usually watch when I'm getting ready and at the moment I'm watching while wrapping presents 😊

[@kybifox13]

My drive to work is 43 mins. So your podcast episodes are perfect for me to listen to While I'm driving. I guess I could consider it a ritual. It's almost out of habit that I have to go and find a chosen family podcast episode to listen to when I get in the car to drive to and from work. It will be a sad day when I catch up and have listened to all of the episodes and have to wait for the most current episode to come out every week. I guess I am going to need to sign up for your patreon.

[@allegra668]

I picked up a cactus once. I thought avoiding big spikes was enough. Can confirm, not good! I was cactus hand for days.

[@Crytotherhythm]

“A series of yellings” is so funny 🤣🤣 please actually title them that

[@themorales6]

Every bit of this was gold! 😂😂😂

[@NayaNe17]

Ok, my daily ritual: every night before bed I wipe my phone with antiseptic

[@sam2633]

this podcast was the first thing to make it into a routine for me 😊

[@cael_aj]

I would say watching this podcast every Wednesday morning before work is a ritual for me, and then I watch the patreon exclusive cold open of my other favorite podcast that comes out on Wednesdays (Perfect Person, shoutout) during my lunch break, and then watch the full episode after work. That's my Wednesday ritual, and it genuinely makes me look forward to Wednesday every week.

[@IzzyTheLittlestJeep]

At about 8:40 it cut to a commercial for Dicks 😂 I spat tea everywhere

[@katehaldane1514]

Having ocd my day is full of rituals

[@smaragdapapadopoulou7807]

Can I just say, Mak's hair looks SO good rn? Like, damn, idk if I want that or I want HER lol

[@ashleyG92892]

I fell into a cactus once, it hurt to get the needle things removed.

[@daphne8223]

Ashley being like, um actually it’s a desert💀 had me dying

[@squidz7806]

I listen to the podcast when I am putting my makeup on for work during the week. Usually with a hot cup of tea or coffee (:

[@foxesrule9037]

This is definitely part of my routine walking home from work and listening to the podcast. I will listen to it on Spotify while walking home and then watch the rest on KZbin. The faster I walk home the more I get to see the visuals so you’re helping me with exercise!

[@mrscreepy7986]

Chosen family is definitely part of my routine lol. I listen to the shenanigans while I work

[@SmashleyBanjolene]

10 months late to this discussion, but as it happens I'm taking an anthropology class called "Ritual and Performance" and playing this in the background while I study for the first exam. The book we're reading for class ("Hidden Powers of Ritual," Bradd Shore) defines ritual as routine that has taken on a heavy symbolic load. Which is to say, it's behavior that probably started off as something innocuous, then became habit, then became routine, and then was layered again with associations made to the routine. Associations like seasonal changes, transitional periods in a person's life, or even just the start of a new day. Routines and rituals are very cyclical, and therefore are also implicitly methods of time-keeping. Before clocks existed, there was ritual. And in that way, they are anchoring experiences that root us in our identities and experiences as individuals and as members of greater communities. It's pretty cool to think about. Thank y'all for having these conversations. 💜 My rituals all tend to involve my cats, who are excellent keepers of time.

[@Julie.Apricot]

When I first found this podcast (2 months ago?) I had a "ritual" of watching/listening to it every day, while searching for cute art on Pinterest and painting it. I did it almost everyday until I listened to all posted episodes, and it helped me relax a lot

[@ROCKONplaceboforever]

The hat is very nice ashley another great episode ❤😂

[@morganadvantures]

I’ve started a nightly routine of brushing my dogs. ❤ It’s a great way for us to intentionally connect and they love the extra attention. It’s a very calming and grounding activity before bed. (I don’t use a shedding brush just a wide bristle one that distributes oils and is good for their coat. I will definitely use the shedding brush every week or two)

[@chrisc2924]

This and WHGS are my rituals. Like when I wfh for a while I'll even leave on old episodes because I like to pretend that yall are chatting over the cube wall at my job and for once it's interesting and not annoying/triggering because my job is trash. Thank you all so much for what you do.