Aliens Thought They Knew Human Ranks Until They Learned ‘Doc’ Could Command Without Orders

[@rinconusmc]

As a Marine i can vouch that our Docs do have mind control powers fueled by coffee.

[@tanguman2]

how else would marines let them place those thermometers where they place them....and i don't mean the mouth or armpit

[@michalwintz7083]

😂😂😂😂❤

[@RealJohnnyGuillotine]

Its the fear of Doc's silver bullet that truly makes people follow commands.

[@KaizerTheWyvern]

My dad was a Green Barret he told me their units medic liked opening treatments with "you start cussing at me while I try to save you I'm taking a limb"

[@Daves_Not_Here_Man_76]

Dont forget hate.

[@glennhedgebeth8069]

Theory 1. Doc's are actually ancient human warrior priests. Not far off 😂

[@Jamhael1]

Nah, those are the Chaplains. "I KICK ASS FOR THE LORD!"

[@techmarine83]

@@Jamhael1 LOL best Peter Jackson movie ever

[@drakon489a]

They fight off disease and death with every patient. They exhibit superhuman endurance and dexterity

[@Jamhael1]

@@drakon489a then, they are Clerics - healers that say "Hey, Death! You know the drill! BRING IT!"

[@markmaher4548]

There are two people you never mess with in the military, Medics & Chefs, they have many, varied & highly unpleasent ways of getting their own back.

[@Tetsujinhanmaa]

It's actually four. The other two are, the guy that updates your service records and pay, and the supply guy. Keep those four happy and you'll be happy.

[@markmaher4548]

@@Tetsujinhanmaa Ah supply, was somebody elses job so I never needed to worry about that as thats what officers are supposed to be for & our pay was handled by some civilian who earned more than I did for sitting on their shiney arse in Whitehall filling in data on Exel spreadsheets.

[@Meistroli]

True and getting a drive on rag from a medic will involve a bit of barting just short of your first born..

[@objectclassketer560]

I would add one more person to the list, the supply officer

[@Meistroli]

@@objectclassketer560 While I was a gurnt i learned unless you want to short on supplies Do Not forget the motorpool Sgt.. They work with the other and it does not get delivered without their ok.. IE.. Food, Fuel, Water and most important the extras you ordered just in case or for your comfort or need..

[@Manuelslayor]

In the military, we call it function before rank.

[@LiamDerWandrer]

Ah yes, when the scientist is running, you follow while asking about the minimum safe distance. When the engenieer runs, you try to run faster, for the problem may have an unpredictable safety distance and the engi has likely a good head start. But when the reactor maintenance dude says "Oh god...", let alone is running, you pray, because there is no safe distance. Rank be damned. Just as you hand any of these guys whatever the frick they want if they look in enough of a hurry to fix something. Your life may very well depend on that patch job getting done asap. Medics are similar. If one takes a look at you and pales but starts calmly explaining, you are bad of but salvagable. If they just go real quite, you are on a propably rather short life timer, barring any medical miracles, and they just started trying to come up with that miracle. So if they give you instructions, you better follow them to the latter. They will not allow you to insult them and their efforts of keeping you alive, without making you regret ever having been born, since only that will make you cherish your life more, in their eyes. Rank means nothing when lives are at stake. Expertise and experience are all that matter in such cases.

[@danielbenyair300]

​@@LiamDerWandrer comments like this one are often even better than the video they are about 🤌🏻

[@ralphm6901]

@@danielbenyair300 that's briefly summed up at 24:00 "The highest ranking officer in any medical situation is the one who knows how to save your life."

[@shieldphaser]

Of course, the doc is not the only anomaly. General officer structures apply most of the time, but everyone has their moment. Doc commands in medical situations. The cook is king in the kitchen. A munitions technician at a dead sprint outranks everyone else. You don't argue with the supply guy. The list goes on.

[@samsignorelli]

Authority vs rank.

[@MikhailScottKy]

And you DO NOT MESS WITH THE E-4 Mafia........

[@carlfranz6805]

I'll say this just once. No caffeine, no Geneva Convention. Any questions?

[@Bruisedmelon]

No question Just it’s never a war crime the first time

[@joyhanschristabelsinaga1322]

@@Bruisedmelon War Crime for the first time => Geneva Suggestion => Geneva Convention. Just ditch the last part and call it a day 🗿

[@xaythearsonist2003]

Okay so, all I have to do now to re-create WW1 is to get rid of all the caffeine and rebrand the war's name as the Caffeine War, in that getting rid of the Geneva Convention. [Slowly points at assistant] ... Take notes.

[@chloekaftan]

​@@joyhanschristabelsinaga1322 the aliens didnt sign the Geneva Convention, so theyre free game.

[@chloekaftan]

me: got it, no caffeine, violence is not the answer, its the question, and the answer is *YES.* the doctor: nooo bloody hell where did you get that idea!? me: basic training sir. the doctor: why in the blue blazes would they teach their soldiers this... me: sir if i may... the doctor: sure. me: if the diplomatic corps job is to prevent wars, the military's job is to end wars. therefore we must be the hammer that isn't afraid to strike the stake into the ground. the doctor: good heavens... god help us all. me: god isnt here sir, but the reaper is. we gotta make him proud.

[@paulacornelison243]

It is amazing how the aliens just do not ask the soldiers about Doc.

[@nevillehoward8736]

True, but for a strongly hierarchical race, asking a subordinate about a higher rank would be... Odd.

[@azurepulse1870]

@@nevillehoward8736 gotta observe from afar without interfering, xD

[@michaellee4694]

Because they wouldn't get it.

[@leexgx]

They nearly caused 3 diplomatic incidents, so they are been very hesitant on direct questions

[@denniseriksson5154]

DO NOT TELL 'EM 'BOUT THA E4 MAFIA THEY WILL DIE OUTOF CONFUSION!!!

[@wernerviehhauser94]

Don't touch the Medic Don't mess with the Doc. And may God, which ever one you may believe in, have mercy upon your soul if you are responsible for anything bad happening to the coffee.

[@waynebrundidge206]

I was a combat medic in Vietnam. And yes, my nickname was Doc. My rank E-4. 😅

[@RealJohnnyGuillotine]

Weilded that power with the threat of a silver bullet.

[@gajeel-of-ironredfox3350]

Much respect! Any good stories about shenanigans you got up to?

[@onedustyboi4660]

Strategically Transfer Equipment to an Alternate Location much?

[@kaleemlylesdawson273]

As a US Navy Corpsman, I approve this video!

[@MurkuryMagick]

oh they would agree instantly in a medical emergency but no way would no one protest taking hotdogs off the menu lol

[@nxla6836]

I think they agreed that hotdogs are an abomination to medical science. Nobody agreed to stop serving them. :)

[@azurepulse1870]

We don't talk about Bruno or how hotdogs get made.

[@Tetsujinhanmaa]

Unless that galley made the worst hot dogs ever. I've seen items removed from the cook's recipe box due to 'unpalatability'.

[@Alinor24]

Maybe Doc threatened them with something...🤔

[@vesuvius1318]

My suspense of disbelief was seriously challenged at that point.

[@johnelliott4521]

True in American military physician captain can over ride darn near anyone. Infantry medic are called doc, never mess with doc. I have seen medical officers leave field grade officers trembling.

[@VTX00128]

If anyone messes with naval coreman with a group of Marines all bets are off. Not something you want to do to put it lightly.🫡

[@Broxyc]

same applies to demo experts in a dead sprint.

[@draconicisha]

Captain? In the field of medical even generals are cowed by the lowest level doctors for their patients

[@VTX00128]

@@Broxyc E.O.D. If you see us running try to keep up! 🤣

[@thomasschulz2167]

In day to day operations, rule follows rank. However as soon as operations involve the medical field the highest ranked doctor available can overrule almost anyone. The only two exceptions are EOD and the Chaplain when they're active in their duties.

[@stephencooper5040]

The ability of "Doc" to hand out orders to ranks over them is due to the fact that humans value human life. If a medic, or corpsman is dealing with a life and death situation, or even a stabilized patient that still needs transport to higher care, EVERYONE accommodates that because of our values. Also, do not fuck with the people who will make sure that you don't die when YOU get wounded... ultimately it's also self preservation.

[@rewmangeorge5957]

The only thing i would not believe is cafeterie would stop serving hot dogs on Doc's command. Not even the Doc has the power to order the Cook in his kingdom. Unless its a medical emergency. And Cook does not see cholesterol as one

[@danielbenyair300]

facts

[@draconicisha]

Yep or telling some random marine to swap out his fries for a salad

[@RamonInNZ]

@@draconicisha there may have been an underlying condition that was being treated!

[@draconicisha]

@@RamonInNZ possibly, until she did away with the hot dogs Nope she's just some health nut

[@panan7777]

@@draconicisha Who would want to put himself in a harms way ???

[@chadramey1140]

You don't mess with Doc

[@thomasmallon9107]

As Gen William Tecumseh Sherman said of Clara Barton, "She ranks me." the ultimate respect.

[@hendyallen5993]

I once had a Sgt crash due to a heart attack. I turned to a full Bird Colonel and yelled at him " Call 911 and get me an AED"..... I don't know where he came from and I didn't see him ever again. But when Doc gives an order, you obey.

[@Hapyendingwow]

This was even funnier because I can actually see this happening. Lol 😅

[@wernerviehhauser94]

My Sergeant (medial corps) once folded a 1st LT (mechanized infantry) to fit under a door for trying to force the medics to camouflage their vehicles during an manoeuvre.

[@Meistroli]

Have seen it happen.. Watched as a medic put an Inf. Col. in his place when it came to who got priority. The Col lost that one badly when he complained to the Gen and got his ass handed to him..

[@ArgonianSkaleel]

Did they ever bother to read our legal writing on command structure? It's literally all there

[@wernerviehhauser94]

Aliens are just humans. We don't read manuals, they don't read manuals.

[@danielbenyair300]

does it feel like reading Terms and Conditions?

[@monkeybomb1232]

We dont read that shit why should they lmao.

[@danielbenyair300]

@@monkeybomb1232 yeah, we'll do whatever and apologize when we break the law and take notes

[@orionvick264]

The Chen family strikes again

[@chloekaftan]

Calling hotdogs an abomination to medical science is something i can live with, but she doesnt get to say that about sausages.

[@danielbenyair300]

LMAO

[@MH5XXXX]

AS SOMEONE who has seen there FAIR and at times WAY MORE than i wanted,I have had ALOT OF DR time in my life for a MULTITUDE of reasons including a 6 month stay on a hospital for a VERY STUBBORN infection with 4 surgeries included plus a 3 week in patient for double pneumonia among other things. YES DOCTORS and NURSES can do the same kind of CRAZY that DR.CHEN was doing. Granted in EMERGENCY SITUATIONS IT MAYBE WORSE CRAZY.

[@daviddiehl-gy2sq]

There's rank then there's athority. Overridden by experience. More interesting is watching Dr's take risks that commanders won't. What ever you do, Don't shoot one.

[@drakencardosian]

Fat Electrician made a video about Doc. Don't even look in Doc's general direction. If you think taking out the leader of the unit was bad, hitting Doc will net you all the artillery in the budget aimed at you... or something to that effect.

[@maryannweitzel5636]

I think aliens would really get confused when we humans sometimes call our military peacekeepers. Why would they be surprised when humans put our priorities on saving lives? Good story. ❤

[@zathtanks]

‘DEFEND THE HEALER, OBEY THE HEALER, RESPECT THE HEALER.’

[@Taurriax]

Hahahahaha 😂😂😂😂 supply sergeant had me bust laugthing. Thats just priceless.

[@shaidorsai4834]

I have a cousin who is a Licensed Nutritionist. She made up the menus for Hospital Patients. I guarantee that one of the First Things she's do is institute/introduce caffeine-free beverages. Caffeine-free coffee, caffeine-free soda. Sugar-Free soft drinks, too. There are times where you are at your desk and you need a taste of a Hot Flavored Beverage. And I do NOT mean hot cocoa. Hot Dogs? OK, BUT....I could go on. We need a sequel where the Good Doctor meets said Nutritionist. And where are the nurses????? The Good Doctor orders, the RN's carry OUT the orders. Have the Good Doctor in a semi-heated meeting with a group of RN's. Yes, we CAN do This, No, we CANNOT do that. While the RN's Formal attire will be white, On Duty they will be wearing scrubs. Yes, there ARE TOO MALE Nurses. For the record: My mother was an RN who worked in a Mental Hospital until retired. And another cousin who was an ER Nurse. Oh, yeah: Where are the orderly's????

[@Jason-sm4oc]

The only person to outrank a medical officer is an ordinace officer runing!

[@markschneider8815]

Theory 3 sounds right!

[@bunnyniyori6324]

This was amazingly good.

[@orionstickguard790]

If the Aliens think that doctor is scary wait till they hear about Desmond Doss and then find out he was a real person. They'll be shitting bricks in shock.

[@SuperHappyFunAJ]

I love this explanation of coffee...

[@roughneckmp]

If aliens are mind-blown by “Doc” then wait until they hear about the “Warrant Officer”.

[@drcovell]

😂😂😂😂😂

[@spudmonky]

7:01 "By the First Egg" is a fantastic way of a hive species saying "by god." LOL

[@Thrognir]

You don’t mess with doc. Doc is the one who gives you 2 800mg Motrin and a new pair of socks

[@stevewilson6723]

Don't forget to hydrate.

[@kennethbondothomsen8832]

First hfy-story I'm gonna share😂😂😂 laughter as the doctor ordered😂😂😂🎉🎉

[@richardbrooksshnee]

Suspension of disbelief was utterly destroyed at the hotdog restriction

[@lfla0179]

And an ordnance technician at a dead run outranks everybody - Schlock Mercenary - The Seventy Maxims of Maximally Effective Mercenaries. 😂

[@charleslamontagne983]

very good story, lots of imagination. It is rare in this series of stories.

[@Nesix1787]

We just gonna let that “Master Chief” line slip past are we?? 😅😂

[@rlbadger1698]

Best AI read to date.

[@patlab555]

Agree

[@danteinferno117]

In times of medical need doc is automatically one rank higher than any patient

[@whtbear12]

Having seen the Doc Rank in action, This story is absolutely one of the best I've read in a very long time. Thank You...

[@AnikaJarlsdottr]

my uncle is retired Royal Army Medical Corps WO1 (british army) and I respect the heck out of the man.

[@MultiTeebag]

Doc is the master of stacking and unstacking bodies

[@Kittyjingles28]

That was a fun listen.

[@rayWH40k]

You don't wanna piss off docs and cook's and gun Smith and supply people for your personal stuff

[@Phoenix411th]

This needs to be a movie

[@waltergolston6187]

Real authority is a Sergeant Major. Sr Chiefs are bad A.. but a Sergeant Major is plain old-fashioned dangerous!

[@VTX00128]

@@waltergolston6187 Oh I can attest to that I knew a Marine Sergeant major in the civilian workforce a nice guy who looks after his own but oh man he can be absolutely ruthless when he's pissed off. Did I mentioned that he is a certified Drill Instructor.😬

[@scottrackley4457]

Warrants are dangerouser.

[@drcovell]

Wait until you meet a Master Chief from a Boomer!

[@gentlemanmadness607]

Now we just need one about aliens learning why you never fck with doc(aka, attack the army docs)

[@MogofWar]

Absolute authority, with highly limited scope. Utilitarian Authority is the most legitimate form of authority in a free society. The chain of command works because the military functions best with clearly defined roles and every rank being properly earned. The physician's ability to bypass that chain of command at times is because the doctor bears the responsibility for the health and safety of all personnel... For both the Doctor and the General, authority derives from duty.

[@RSOxSPEC4x]

The E-4 mafia would blow the xenos minds

[@ronaldhudson169]

Also - to quote Schock Mercinary - A warrant officer in motion outranks a standing general.

[@sniperwolf7]

How many invisible ranks are there? (Sense of impending doom approaches.) Eh, I better not say.

[@maxjjackson]

A fun story well told from a new perspective.

[@Sonnabend00]

Docs are fearsome, but even they tremble before the Formidable Charge Nurse, whose word is not just law, but is the Holy Writ of God. Beneath the Charge Nurse dwell their acolytes, the fearsome Ward Nurse, who does not leap tall buildings in a single bound but kicks the buildings over, is not faster than a speeding bullet, but tells the bullets to get lost they are busy, to which order the bullets humbly obey. We are nurses. We are the Law. ..and can we please find another name than Sarah Chen?

[@inscrutababble1932]

Oh, and do you think anyone would actually get around to explaining that 'Doc' was more of a nickname, and the actual rank was Chief Medical Officer?

[@moogoogashu8647]

this is the kind of story that needs movie or two lol. doesnt need a huge budget. has inside jokes on three branches of command. just concentration on interactions of med vs command and what really matters in places after battles lol

[@EnderPearlRs]

"They shot Doc." "Those poor bastards."

[@TorchwoodPandP]

Moonbase Alpha? 😂😂😂

[@staplesock5549]

As a medic, it is kinda odd to be chatting with PSG and first Sgt and another spc or private snap to parade rest and everything to ask some questions. Sends me through a loop every time.

[@ronprince1478]

Good story, I enjoyed.

[@Monkeywrench542]

Yep, that's a Doc. Out troop PA, told our troop commander to stop eating all the greasy food and start eating healthy foods, including salads and vegetables.

[@barrycabbageM34]

Dont touch our Boats. Dont touch our Coffee. Dont touch our Docs.

[@Bob-r9s9o]

I love how disorganized these stories are like one sentence will be like. They consume this beverage something called coffee and extreme levels and then the next sentence after it will be the great coffee incident now all the sudden everybody knows about coffee

[@Ventorath]

There was a bit about x number of instances of "doc" pulling rank over the course of 4 months of joint operations or something, but the story started off as them JUST witnessing this. So you could argue there was a time skip. If it were written by a person, that's how that would have been handled. That said, it's definitely just AI stuff not keeping small details straight. Sometimes it's workable (like this one, at least as far as I've watched so far) and sometimes it creates a total mess that no one should have uploaded.

[@ACriticalGeek]

Also, a running explosive ordinance disposal tech outranks everyone.

[@danielbenyair300]

even docs

[@draconicisha]

​@@danielbenyair300nah, doc outranks the disposal tech when he's missing 2 fingers

[@atlasjunky7677]

You don't mess with 2 people in this order the guy that's supposed to give commands because without him it's grunts n crafts time and doc because they are the ones keeping people alive

[@RealJohnnyGuillotine]

When America loses command structure its no longer war... Its, Waugh! Just Space Orks running amuk.

[@raydgreenwald7788]

Gonna be honest, I don’t know how their military functions with this obsession of protocol. Sometimes function is more important in emergency

[@XtreemAlan]

One does not simply mess with Doc and think they can walk

[@joeblack6379]

Imagine he searched our internet for The Doctor.

[@inscrutababble1932]

Pfft, Doc would totally have rank insignia. It's just more likely something unobtrusive clipped to the chest of the medic's uniform/scrubs/lab coat. Also, could you imagine how weighed down a senior medical officer would get if they started handing out medals to medics for lives saved/people spared from traumatic impairment due to timely intervention/doing their jobs? I mean, in these stories, humans are usually the crazy, gung-go people... But honestly, our medical professionals are probably the craziest of us. That or the veterinarians.

[@_starfiend]

If the aliens think there's something special about coffee rituals, wait until they discover 'the brew' or 'brewup' and tea rituals in general. lol.

[@tranquilthoughts7233]

It's really easy, just six rules and you know exactly who may give who where, when and what order. A doc falls under rule number three which gives him the authority to order any and all soldiers (wether they are on duty or not and regardless of the docs or the soldiers actual rank) as long as he himself is on duty and the order is related to medial care. Ordering a captain to stop unloading cargo and prioritze unloading wounded soldiers? Perfectly within the docs command authority. Ordering some generel to make way for transporting a wounded soldier? absolutly fine.

[@VikingTemplar]

I have found myself enjoying these short stories that are now showing up on my vid feed

[@jeremymacdonald6687]

the flags on their shoulders are facing the wrong way.

[@TheCsel]

I would suggest that in medical emergencies doctors have authority granted from the highest command to take charge of the situation, unless actively countermanded by someone on site. But no one is short-sighted and foolhardy enough to countermand a doctor in an emergency.

[@johnrettig1880]

Yes military personnel are afraid of needles Is especially the legendary " square one "

[@corpsmanh]

Why is it all ways the mf's with tattoos tho?

[@sharibigay4712]

Good story, loved the humor with the truth.

[@argentum530]

As a former Firefighter/EMT1 I can vouch for the most trained and competent medical person on scene is in charge... it might be a medical Dr. or it might be a Paramedic, but the one who knows how to fix the problem is in charge. It won't be a Dentist, a Dr. of Philosophy or the Holistic Herbal Naturopath, it will be the person who has been there done that and we always knew who that was.

[@treykenley3499]

They heard about The Master Chief? Wonder how long until they meet John 117. Just that kne line deserves a spin off of them meeting that one man and the other Spartans.

[@ironboy3245]

Please take note that Lord Hood didn't ask how chief was going to return the bomb, he just accepted it as fact and planned around it

[@treykenley3499]

@ironboy3245 master iron? Mind telling me what you are doing on that post?

[@denen404]

100% of the time the MILITARY ALL listen to doc

[@danielbenyair300]

even docs can't touch the hotdogs

[@TKBarnes]

Tell the cop nothing, tell the doctor everything. And if your EOD tech is running - follow! 😂

[@WilliamMerculief-i4k]

These stories are great with a lot of humor😅

[@eugeneortega8372]

It doesn't matter how strong you are .when doc walks in everyone listen

[@Keelindsey]

Really need to spell check that AI

[@RonaldMyers-oz3pk]

TY for the story 😊😊

[@treyriver5676]

There are In nearly as hierarchies official lines of command and limited exceptions (doc) and there are the hidden lines based on competence and personality. Also there is Line and Staff a staff officer does not often command while a line officer that interferes with the staff officer best have a very good reason. Doc is staff (mostly)

[@larryl43]

thank you for the laughter.

[@bruhai3917]

So as a Doc I can confirm, ideas 2, 3 and 4 are all correct at the same time.

[@Profalllright]

New sub here - That was a good one - Can't wait for the next !

[@Scifiuniverse1]

Awesome, thank you!

[@billspearman2326]

Really great. Laughed my ass off several times.

[@MH5XXXX]

MOONBASE ALPHA shades of SPACE:1999 😀

[@TheKb117]

Damn, we're old.😁 Martin Landau and Barbara Bain. My crush was the alien lady with dot pattern on her face.😍

[@MH5XXXX]

@@TheKb117 OH the shapeshifter. YEA SHE WAS HOT!!!

[@stevewilson6723]

Check out a series called UFO done by the same group and it was the basis for the OG XCOM game.

[@MH5XXXX]

@@stevewilson6723 I KNOW all too well i watched UFO AND SPACE 1999 on tv back when they were originally shown too long ago. GR8 shows i wish someone would redo them.

[@dr.prestige8120]

When it comes to injured / infected, Our Moral Command is much higher than our Military Command (Plus their scary when they get mad :( ) 😆

[@AliceLovkyne]

You do not piss off the white mage is a good rule

[@deathsheir2035]

this was fun to listen to. thanks

[@shadeshadow007]

Got a link to the original story?

[@TheStoryVault1805]

Loeved the story :)

[@waynebrundidge206]

😂 I was a DOC in the military

[@OMCPoker]

Nice story. But, should be edited down about 10 min.

[@23Hadrian]

dogs here, dogs there, we have a lot of dogs everywhere. I felt like I was in a shelter.😅

[@Croiri]

I thought I was tripping when I read dogs.

[@susanwetter3107]

Don't read, listen!😂😂

[@MorRobots]

"Previously observed Sgt Major Phenomenon" lol