“Am I an Introvert or is it Social Anxiety?” | ep.215

This week licensed therapist, Kati Morton shares some ways we can be more honest with our therapist about our depression, the difference between understanding something intellectually versus feeling it emotionally, and introversion versus social anxiety. She then offers some insight into the ways we can appreciate our bodies, how to get in touch with our emotions, and how to tell where you are feeling them in your body.
Audience questions:
1. I find it hard to tell my therapist I feel like I am slipping into another depressive episode. We have done so much work and she has been so proud of me that I feel bad having to say I am slipping. I feel like she will be disappointed in me - even though she'd never admit to it. I want to be honest instead of mask but it's so hard. Why is this so hard for me? 01:10
2. Why is it that intellectually I can understand my adverse childhood experiences and trauma, but emotionally I am an absolute mess? I have been reading many books about ACE's and trauma including both of yours. I bounce between ah ha moments to being unregulated. I can understand why learning was so hard as a child/teenager, my teacher comments that I was "lazy," "not living up to my potential'' or a "daydreamer" are not true, or that I can tune out loud noises or someone talking... 10:46
3. I'm very introverted plus have social anxiety. How can I tell whether I actually need alone time at the moment or am just avoiding it because of the anxiety, but it would be good for me to step outside my comfort zone? 25:11
4. How can I learn to love and appreciate my body? I feel like my body is just this inconvenient attachment I have to lug around all day. I’m irritated when it needs something like food or the bathroom. Sexuality is a completely foreign concept. I’ve done the work to figure out how I got here and obviously there’s many reasons for this. But now I don’t know how to get myself back... 28:09
5. Hi Kati, my question is about getting in touch with your emotions and working through the difficult ones.. for example my therapist told me depression is anger turned inward but everytime I try and get in touch with my anger it doesn’t want to talk to me. I try to work through it during therapy and it doesn’t want to come out. 34:37
6. My therapist tells me that I need to feel my emotions in my body but I can never pinpoint where in my body I feel my emotions, especially positive emotions. 37:38
0:51: ⚖️ Struggling to communicate depressive feelings to therapist due to fear of disappointment.
3:45: ⚠️ Importance of acknowledging mental health progress and setbacks in therapy.
7:21: 💪 Resilience in coping with relapses, therapist's support, and learning from triggers.
11:22: 📚 Struggling with childhood trauma impact on learning, seeking coping skills, and difficulty expressing emotions in therapy.
15:09: 🎭 Exploring emotions through self-reflection, explanation to an alien, and analyzing TV characters' emotions.
18:56: ⚖️ Importance of addressing trauma, recognizing its impact, and utilizing various modalities for healing.
23:01: ⚠️ Importance of finding a therapist who understands your specific issue and creates a positive connection for healing.
26:27: 💬 Distinguishing between introversion and social anxiety based on fear of embarrassing situations and exhaustion from surface conversations.
30:13: 💖 Importance of appreciating our bodies to improve self-image and mental well-being.
33:59: 💭 Exploring emotions and body image issues, emphasizing appreciation over love.
37:53: 💭 Exploring the neutrality of emotions, emphasizing the importance of understanding and embracing all emotions.
Recap for • “Am I an Introvert or ... by Tammy AI
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[@pisceshilda]

As a self-diagnosed (not) introvert I know that I'm definitely not shy or antisocial or anything, I can handle social situations very well, but I definitely don't enjoy it if I have a choice. So this is a personal preference, the nature of me. But I'm so sick and tired hearing all these stereotypical labels and misconceptions and nasty comments about me being quiet and introverted, as if there's anything wrong with me, but in fact I'm perfectly fine and as happy as any extroverted person.

[@roksolida36]

You must be an Ambivert :)

[@DamianoftheRyans]

🤗

[@pisceshilda]

@@roksolida36 Yes most people are ambivert in social situations. I just feel like I'm leaning towards the introverted end of the spectrum if I have a choice, enjoy the quiet alone time more than dealing with a crowd (^◡^)

[@pisceshilda]

@@DamianoftheRyans (^◡^)

[@roksolida36]

@@pisceshilda totally felt 💯 I’m the same way! I know you’re probably a pleasure to be around bc you enjoy your time and space not stressed out by others all the time

[@roksolida36]

25:14 “Am I Introverted or is it Social Anxiety?”

[@As-jj2rc]

Thank you very much! 🫶🏻

[@nikkimckay860]

@roksolida36.i have social anxiety I don't know if I'm an introvert your comment was interesting

[@araleh06]

Hi Kati, just a quick message to tell you that I like your podcasts👏👏🙂

[@raywood8187]

I can really relate to this video, some of these are questions I would have asked, especially on the introvert or social anxiety subject. Anxiety would be, OMG what if someone doesn't like my comment? 😷 Thank you, Kati!

[@sintha333]

I am currently taking anatomy classes and the human body is amazing! It is great that all these organs and tissues work together to do all the things we do in a day!

[@janetslater129]

For me, in terms of introversion, it's like I can physically tired after "people-ing" all day, even if I enjoy being around others, enjoying the conversations, occasionally feel fulfillment, etc. At the end of the day, I need time away from people to recharge.

[@noura008]

kati, listening to your podcasts help me acknowledge so much and have a better understanding about myself. also you’ve helped me not feel so lonely.. thank you for everything ❤️

[@nils4812]

Bonjour noura

[@yoyofargo]

This episode reminded me of the song Not Perfect by Tim Minchin when we talk about appreciating our bodies and how we interact with and think about our environment. That song pulls me out of my head when it goes down each level of abstraction. It helps me turn my focus inside out when I need to.

[@PerfectlyImperfect-df4jt]

Thanks for answering my question. You hit the nail on the head...extreme people pleaser. Makes sense that I am worried my therapist will be upset that I am struggling again. MDD is such a beast but fighting back with everything I have learned so far. ❤

[@caseybirgitta-skoog5532]

Mental health is physical health. Mental health is physical health. Our brains are not seperate floating entities from our bodies.

[@nancyliawoods]

Thank you so much Kati. I am definitely both introverted and also have social anxiety. Some days are better than others. I'm somewhat of a content creator in my niche and struggle terribly with this. Some days I'm so pumped to create, however many days I shy away and fear that social connection..and then I end up disappointed in myself for not doing more when I DO feel social. Idk if it makes sense I absolutely love listening to these even if some of them I cannot relate to, even so, I still always take away something. We appreciate you ❤

[@Lily-psych]

Thank you for answering my add on Kati! You always are so articulate and thoughtful in your responses. It is greatly appreciated. Hope you are well!

[@Katimorton]

You are so welcome!

[@JennaHasm]

​@@Katimorton Ditch the psychology. It's hogwash. It's as reliable and logical as astrology or tarot reading. Ether make psychology to no longer be a sudoscience (by doing actual blood tests and fMRI scans of the organ you say it studies), or learn an actual science that does.

[@ssbl85]

What a wonderful way to slowly getting to know emotions before learning to regulate them! Thank you, Katie. 🙏

[@badgoodbadgoodbadgood]

25:15 thanks for clarifying. I always believed that I am an introvert, which people didn't expect as I usually forced myself out there to socialise more and build connections. Some time later, I thought maybe this psychological discomfort was a sign of mild social anxiety, but what you described is much more serious than my current predicament. I might have experienced it as a teen, but it sounds so serious, perhaps requiring medication and professional help, while I just grew out of it, with some confidence boost. But sometimes I still get confused between extraversion and introversion since I have been forcing myself to mingle with people for years now. I guess I am just an introvert that got good at lying to myself.

[@MagnumInnominandum]

Appreciate your perspectives

[@BPCado]

A couple of these questions where exactly what I needed to hear ad it's fascinating how easy it can be to listen and validate others experiences, while wrestilng with the same things. This podcast and community always helps me widen my perspective. Thanks to each one of you.

[@brittanywilcox7377]

The way I conceptualize therapy is the same as if I hired any other professional to teach me something (think coach or tutor). If I felt like I wasn't able to ride my horse well on my own outside of lessons, or I felt like I was regressing in a skill, I would tell my trainer. They can't help me with an issue I don't tell them about.

[@bones642]

Thanks for highlighting this, I wouldn’t have watched the introvert/anxiety source video otherwise bc that’s not my issue, but this is good stuff.

[@nikkimckay860]

Kati Morton. So good to see you again and I always need your calming soft voice I feel like the last week or so iv been drawing in my depression trying to push though my anxiety to get the important things done I haven't done anyway you are looking beautiful love that light make up and very pretty cardigan a lot of interesting questions as always and you are always so detailed and helpful with all your answers to people s questions p.s I am still trying to get my question noticed and chosen p.s I am checking all the time for your mental health livestream s ❤️❤️

[@itsonlyatail]

I have always felt anxiety and just a not comfortable in social activities, like I’m not worthy ( that’s maybe not the right word) I had a break in 2017 and deaths and life came right in a row. I isolated…thankfully Covid happened, but now I am more comfortable alone. My anxiety is so high just going to the store for food, I would rather not have food in the house then go. I know you don’t read or respond to comments, but maybe there is someone else in this channel that feels the same?

[@nikkimckay860]

@itsonlyatail. Good and interesting comment I have social anxiety as well I am not comfortable in social situations or activities I can understand and relate to this ❤

[@nikkimckay860]

@itssonlyatail. I can get high anxiety too with hot sweats and shakes and shortness of breath the feeling of not wanting to go out or get home quicker if and when I do have to go out somewhere you are not alone in this ❤

[@owlbookworld5041]

How long should I give a therapist a chance until I try to find a new one? I feel like it’s not helping and I’ve noticed I just come home angry after talking about certain subjects. On top of that I’m only able to go a certain day where I won’t have to bring my kids so I’m having to go weeks without a session since she’s full on those day. But I’ve only been through maybe 4 or 5 sessions so far.

[@abdullahhabis7719]

There’s something in me that let everyone takes control of me , it’s like I don’t have my own will. I wish I can get control of my life and take my own responsibility 🙏

[@aubreyrose3283]

I'm still a bit confused about the difference between introversion and social anxiety. For me, the idea of going out and meeting people sounds appealing only if I know the people I'm going with or if I am comfortable in the setting. If it's new people or an unfamiliar setting, I know that I could do it, but the mental energy required to get over my anxiety seems overwhelming and it overshadows any benefits I might get from being social, so I don't bother. Is this the kind of thing you are referring to?

[@belindaweber7999]

Thanks Katie, this has been on my mind lately. I don't want to use being an introvert as a excuse for something that is actually anxiety based. Wow - question 4 hit home - thank you

[@piperhope5895]

I'll be back to finish this video. My dog wants attention and I want to take her for a walk.

[@villevanttinen908]

Does it matter? In both cases result is the same: you are alone.

[@azzajedidi7899]

How can we ask questions? Is it on Patreon? Thanks

[@steelearmstrong9616]

I just feel fake around everyone including close friends I’ve known forever who are good people. Even if it is someone I’m into, once they start talking I can’t help but to think how fake they are. I Genuinely enjoy No more than 30mins and then after that I have to leave as I start feeling anxious with anxiety rising

[@DamianoftheRyans]

Good video. By the way, I am BOTH. I love people dearly and deeply, but being AROUND them is draining to me, even if the experience is totally positive. I do like to help/aid people in ways that are quick and impacting, though. For example, if I saw someone starving: "HEY! Here's a can of beans, a can-opener and a spoon! Enjoy! Bye bye! God bless you!" 🤣

[@kbellmurray]

What if you were never an introvert but you have become one through experience? I love people but interactions are draining since I’ve become chronically ill. I’m also over 40. I’m a different person than I was in my twenties

[@kbellmurray]

I have an eating disorder but it has nothing to do with how I look. It’s all health related and control related. I am underweight, and I wish I could put on weight

[@sarahm2003]

I want to present another view on positive vs negative emotions. I believe that there are absolutely positive emotions and negative emotions, but I don't equate negative = bad and positive = good. Instead I see them akin to the PH scale where acids are negative and bases are positive compared to neutral. In the right context both baking soda and vinegar are very useful. Too much of either or in the wrong context can be problematic. Too much baking soda can be toxic and lead to ruined baked goods. Too much vinegar can cause an upset stomach and result an unappetizing salad. I would not typically add baking soda to a salad or include vinegar in a chocolate chip cookie recipe. Uncontrollable sobbing while driving down the freeway or launching into a stand up comedy routine at a funeral more often than not will be problematic. Reverse the contexts or dial down the intensity and the sadness or laughter can bring sweet relief and add the right "flavor" to life's events.

[@nikkimckay860]

I am only in the Inkwell club- £4:99 a month can I still watch the livestreams and ask questions ?❤

[@LikeABrezeee]

Yayy new kati content!

[@Ahmed_Phenomenal_Ali]

❤️❤️❤️

[@SweepTheLeg2023]

🤔 *Or some people just Suck?*

[@nils4812]

Bonjour kati morton

[@AndreasVlurchVader]

For me it is "Social Bluhbhourglie"

[@erinobrien8457]

I hate my life I want to go to heaven

[@nikkimckay860]

@erinobrien8457.hello I am Nikki I have been watching and listening to Kati for years I have social anxiety and depression I felt sad seeing your comment please know you are not alone in your feelings and emotions sending prayers we are all going though this mental health together no matter where we are from ❤

[@H3321KG]

In my opinion. Dont have to worry about the distinction. People are despicable. Stay away