Autism and Suicide - The Terrifying Mental Health Statistics

[@kr3642]

So, I just found out I was autistic last year at 27. And my mom unalived herself in 2017. After realizing about myself, I think she was autistic and had bpd. I understand why she did it now. We can't keep jobs, she struggled with relationships and was always on the edge of poverty. She was beautiful and smart, but people (especially other women) hated her.

[@alisonmercer5946]

😭😳😭😭😭😭

[@sherrym5556]

Very sad, I'm sorry 😞

[@etcwhatever]

Im sorry about your mom. Really. I find it difficult to be in a job for more than 2yrs. Refused an high salary opportunity because they wanted me at the office 4x week there...i couldnt handle it before covid...and i cant now. So im in the same job for 4yrs but im on a sick leave (again). Its mentally hard to keep going. Also take good care of your physical health. I found out i have an auto immune disease. Just too much pain all over. Take care. I see, i also get a lot of bullying from women at the jobs. Men dont make fun of me.

[@emmanuelbeaucage4461]

sorry you had to go thru this. my mother unalived herself in 2012 probably for similar reasons.

[@gothboschincarnate3931]

I find re-connection to lost loved ones helps a lot, but its so unreliable and difficult.

[@BillMurey-om3zw]

39 yrs before I realized I am neurodivergent, and I still suicidal because of no employment, I'm tired of masking.

[@brianmeen2158]

same here. I realized I was autistic at 38 - I’m 39 now and in a sort of shock about it all .. I’ve masked for so long that I have no idea who I am anymore . Oh and yes, the masking is getting harder to do and more draining

[@gabrielraphael8084]

Me too 🐈

[@lingy74]

As an autistic person, my main goal in life is to survive and find thinks to be grateful for everyday.

[@MrAdriancooke]

For me a good day is a day when I do not feel suicidal

[@derekotto08]

Keep that positive mindset!

[@blooddiary2227]

Good to hear this topic. Because I went through almost 29 suicide attempts within 20 years, I'm 33 years old with ASD 🥺 came from toxic parents.

[@ThomasHenley]

Oh my, I’m so sorry you’ve had these experience… I can’t imagine what that would like for you. Thank you for sharing, it’s always valuable to hear different voices ❤

[@mathilda6763]

went through one attempt, but it didn't work. felt like a loser afterwards because I couldn't even manage to do that. it sucked. s. ideation was my go to fantasy to cope as a teen when I was feeling overwhelmed or didn't sleep enough for too long. it still sneaks up on me from time to time every few days but I am getting better. If me and family would've known that there's stuff you can do to manage overstimulation and sensory processing sensitivity, it would have prevented a lot of sadness and trauma for me and my family...especially my small siblings.

[@oleonard7319]

@@ThomasHenley putting up with Neurtotypicals make most of us suicidal

[@ruthhorowitz7625]

Three attempt and toxic parents. Got diagnosed after the third attempt at 57.

[@UnicornCharlotte77]

Are you ok now?!!

[@raven4090]

The pych wards in America are way behind on psychological helping. Having experienced both, even though neither are ideal for autistics, I'd rate the one I was in in the UK FAR SUPERIOR to the one I was in in here in the states. The one in the UK had lots of things to do to fill the day, very friendly staff, and I was allowed to bring in some things from home to help me feel more comfortable. Here they take away everything and it's a cold, sterile environment. Literally cold. As in I constantly walked around with a blanket wrapped around me.

[@DontAssume123]

And you color Then it’s $5k

[@raven4090]

@@DontAssume123 Yeah, but it's not worth it. Fortunately 2015 is far behind me.

[@kellypawspa]

They gave you a blanket?? Lucky you... they even took my shoestrings and bra..

[@raven4090]

@@kellypawspa That's terrible. They really have a way of making us feel even worse, don't they?

[@KarenDUlrich]

Your comment needs a LOT more air time. Let's start with suicide completion following "help" from "professionals." Psych wards are all about re-victimization, medicating into a coma so staff can sit on their phones all day and collect double digit paychecks for doing nothing. There is no "counseling." Cognitive Behavioral "therapy" is more shamed based, you are a fukc up, everything you do to cope is wrong, bad, and you are stup/id, stup/id, stup/id.

[@notleavingmyroom]

Thank you and Amelia for making space for this conversation! I went to psychological therapy with a professional that in theory specializes in autistic people, but I ended up teaching them what autism is and what is our experience. The therapy technically finished, but they just gave me tools that are based on gaslighting my autistic experience. I’m struggling with depression and anxiety constantly as you two discussed, lately is rather worse, but I’m trying to listen about the tools that autistic people talk about and applying them is what has been keeping alive.

[@alexsautismacceptancechann1459]

Thank you so much for posting this. The importance of talking about this cannot be overstated

[@ThomasHenley]

Definitely, and of course don’t forget Amelia from Autistic positivity 🎉

[@AutisticlyRose]

I've unfortunately been in a LOT of different psyc wards in the states and they vary greatly depending on where you go. My worse experience as an adult was going through a low income scheme to get help, the stereotypical just a hospital floor little better than a prison with everything taken away. My best one was a place that focused on mental health and separated patients into based on diagnoses & symptoms & did multiple group therapy sessions. The main purpose of the lock wards here is just to stabilize on medications, then get you out the door. It is also very expensive, and a lot of health insurance plans have different rules where mental health has its own rules and exclusions.

[@mathilda6763]

my doctor told me that a lot of psychiatric medication doesn't work as reliable for autistic people as it does for non autistic people. I am not sure if I can explain it scientifically but it seems to have to do with transmitters in the brain being either extremely sensitive (so the effect can be way to strong) or to insensitive (so it doesn't have much of an effect.). So knowing that the patient is on the spectrum can have quite an impact on the choice of medication if the psychiatrist/neurologist is knowledgeable about how to work with autistic people.

[@gothnerd887]

So there's no hope for us

[@chesneymigl4538]

That tracks with my experience with ADHD stims

[@Catlily5]

That is interesting because I am autistic and mentally ill and I have had major problems with medications. I am usually very sensitive to them and have to take low doses.

[@WillyKillya]

Maybe that's why one of the darkest times in my life was when they put me on the generic Prozac fluoxetine, I wanted to jump off the roof of my workplace.

[@leilap2495]

Her meds (clarification): Venlafaxine is brand name Effexor. It is a serotonin and norepinephrine reuptake inhibitor (SNRI). Quetiapine is brand name Seroquel, which is an antipsychotic. His med: mirtazepine is Remeron, an antidepressant used for mood, sleep, and increasing appetite (note: does not always increase appetite). Another note: autistics tend to have genetic differences affecting metabolism and general response to medication. For example, just like these two individuals take a sedating medication, other autistics may need extra stimulating/activating medications, like myself. Also of note, ADHD medication can be good for daytime as well as nighttime use, and can be given to autistics.

[@sr2291]

Why should I have to be on meds because a family member is abusing me?

[@Catlily5]

​@@sr2291 My parents abused me and I am on medicine. Some medication can help if you have been abused (depending on your symptoms). BUT, you should be on medication because it helps you and not just to please your parents.

[@sameus11maximus]

Because they can’t sort their shit out.

[@leilap2495]

@@sr2291 if you are being abused, please report it to authorities.

[@vomgurl]

@@sr2291 this is something i ask myself daily. it seems like my pain wont ever end.

[@sharonvaldez9059]

I am awaiting autism testing in the next couple of weeks. I am overwhelmed with fighting 2nd level LTD appeal. Also filing for SSDI (also have Fibromyalgia and Rheumatoid Arthritis. I have called so many places and can’t get an Advocate for someone autistic. I self identify. I’ve been thru so many of your experiences especially last year checking myself into a dual diagnosis treatment center for 74 days. I was bullied and ignored when I begged to switch counselors. She disregarded my panic attacks and breakdowns and said it was DBT that was forcing me to get to the root cause…Borderline Personality Disorder. She said “YOU DO NOT HAVE AUTISM, YOURE NOT DYSLEXIC. Daily clinicals were help in an old firehouse and EVERYTHING echoed. I couldnt wear my hearing aids, and am overstimulated with them. Especially when I have to wear glasses…the hearing aids keep my glasses from sitting on my face and drives me insane. Do you have any suggestions for getting help with my Long Term Disability and SSDI?

[@meko3089]

Please answer this persons question

[@Catlily5]

​@@meko3089I am on disability in the USA. Most people have to try 3 or 4 times before they get on. The first time without a lawyer. After that you have to hire a lawyer who will be paid with part of your back payment. Even with a lawyer there are no guarantees you will be accepted.

[@CheetahSnowLeopard]

What a sweetheart. She has a great understanding of English too which is very impressive to me.

[@HigoIndico]

She's been studying English since maybe 8-9 years old, so how is it impressive? It's like saying that using a spoon is very impressive for a 12 year old. If she doesn't have any major issues that prevent her from learning a second language, then I think it sounds kind of infantilizing thing to say, that it's "very impressive".

[@andreawisner7358]

Almost any mental health care is expensive in the US. If you can get Medicaid, which is almost impossible, then you can get pretty cheap care but it doesn't sound good.

[@Catlily5]

I got very depressed when I was 13 or 14 and was self harming as well. I was first hospitalized when I was 15. I was misdiagnosed with BPD as well. I attempted 4 times from age 17 to 35.

[@Catlily5]

I was first put on Prozac. I got anorexia from the Prozac. I did much better on Sertraline (Zoloft). Everyone is different when it comes to medications.

[@thedjqmobstl]

You can't imagine the frustration of having a father like this growing up. He's very childish, manipulative, and cowardly. I was scapegoated many times as a teenager for desperately trying to call him out for it. It's very bizarre and frustrating to experience.

[@smicketysmoo]

Very informative and helpful and healing podcast. I resonated with all of it. Amelia is a great contributor. Thank you for making it.

[@notleavingmyroom]

Really looking forward for this one!!

[@peinzen]

Thank you for sharing these important eye-openers. Together we have hope! ♥🙏

[@Itsmelancedehring]

I’ve tried twice. And I have learned a lot since. It’s the not understanding….

[@leilap2495]

We do have public healthcare in the US, known as Medicaid. For people who are permanently disabled and elderly, there is Medicare. Medicare pays well, so services are not negatively affected. Medicaid is not adequately supported and so many people are depending on it due to many socioeconomic and political issues that you likely already have some awareness of. Many Medicaid funded services are lacking in quantity and quantity, because many doctors cannot rationalize going into so much debt for their education to then be paid by Medicaid. My autistic son, for example, needs to receive general anesthesia during his dental appointments. Neither his dentist nor the anesthesiologist will accept medicaid, even though he receives full coverage privately and through medicaid, in his case due to disabled status, not income. His next trip to the dentist will cost thousands of dollars, even though he has full medical and dental coverage. The providers don’t have to accept less money if they don’t want to. I do want to have safe care, so I want a well funded clinic. The same sorts of scenarios play out in every area of medicine, including psychiatry.

[@marymegrant1130]

Medicare has its share of problems. It only pays a fraction of the total billed and many doctors do not accept their reimbursement amount. It does not cover dental, optical, hearing aids or prescriptions unless you buy additional coverage beyond Part B which pays 80% after you have paid your deductible.

[@chesneymigl4538]

For the majority of people I now it might as well not exist. They'll give any excuse to deny people seeking aid

[@Catlily5]

Medicaid is better insurance than Medicare. Medicaid is not good for dental but Medicare doesn't cover dental at all. I am on both.

[@johedges5946]

@@Catlily5 sounds like you are one "amazing" Mom! 🥰

[@Catlily5]

@@johedges5946 I am not a mother. Maybe you meant to reply to the OP?

[@paulbeaney4901]

I must either be extremely lucky or extremely rare because i am neurodivergent (AuDHD) with an (INTP) personality type. All of those "lables" are professionally attributed. Yet i can still work. I am in full-time work. Even tho it drains and depresses me, i can mostly withstand it. For those who can't work, i feel so deeply for you because i truly understand the terrible isolation. School was also the most terrible time of my life. Surrounded by "trend following" irrelevant rubbish. Then it was the so-called teachers.

[@jamesbraun9842]

Yeah, I was accepted in my job. Once people found out I had an accommodation I would be ousted. I tried something new (lying and saying I don't have a condition and was hired and have been promoted.

[@Catlily5]

In the USA most hospitals are privet and you must pay part and if you have insurance that will pay part. People have received very high bills. In 1993 I received a bill for $8000 but I did not have to pay because I was not an adult. In 1998 I received a bill for $3000 for 4 days in the hospital. Luckily I did not have to pay because I was put back on disability. Now the bills could be way higher. The state hospital is government run and free. But usually you only go there if things are bad or you are poor. My parents had no health insurance so I went there as a teenager. Luckily they had a good program when I was there. Their adult unit was awful though.

[@sariña_seoane]

1:02:55 Dissociative Disorders are highly comorbid with Autism. We go through so much since birth… Our nervous systems just work overtime trying to manage sensory stimuli, social input, and the cognitive dissonances that arise from the conflict between our internal and external experiences. Personally, therapy wasn't much help until we recognised and addressed the dissociation. Just some food for thought. Be safe, everyone

[@anngreen5601]

what an amazing podcast! than you both so much. xxx

[@oleonard7319]

Yeah people get locked up in the us and get given a giant bill

[@etcwhatever]

The psychologist at the hospital recommended me to a specialist in adult autism and im still freaking out thinking that he will hate me and misdiagnose 😮 ive been an anxious person for as long as i can remember. Trying to keep it cool. Just calling and making the appointment hurts me inside 😢 it always helps me to see your videos and understand im not alone. Sertraline and escitalopram i also took. Without much of a result...escitalopram made me gain a lot of weight. I left those meds slowly. Now im on pregabalin for sleep and pain management. And diazepam but this one makes me more nervous, my doctor us weaning me out slowly.

[@Anubis424242]

What frustrates me is knowing that I myself am neurodivergent, but I have no diagnosis even though I tried to get one. What's even worse is living in a neurotypical world, I feel like I'm in a prison. It's an oppressive prison that enslaves people for money and I have always hated it here. If I decide to leave this world, that isn't wrong. It's a preference to not be here that should be respected, not silenced. I would access MAID or Death with Dignity if I could.

[@smokedbeefandcheese4144]

please don't the world is much better with you in it don't do it I know you feel fatalistic but there's still fun you can have people that would like to meet you there are people out there right now who are lonely like you who would like your company. they will respect your experience with no diagnoses

[@gothboschincarnate3931]

the patients should not be helping us, and we should not be teaching the doctors...says a lot about the incompetence of our psychological healthcare system.

[@leilap2495]

In place of “commit,” one can say attempt or complete.

[@veronicahorton4951]

I think completed is just as difficult or worse to hear somehow.

[@hopeconner-garcia3859]

Yes, mental institutions in USA bill insurance. Insurance might cover half of you have premium coverage 💸💸💸

[@EspeonaSparkle]

Very important topic!

[@kmech3rd]

Life feels like a real long time when it feels like a game you don't understand or a movie you don't want to watch.

[@Medietos]

Why not say the details, ? It helps to get perspective and the full picture makes it more real and helpful. Prayer and meditation helps, but it can be too difficult to get to do it when longterm sick, abused, sleepless and exhausted in isolation. We hav e to research and learn to self-help. I agree that others than Drs helped more. In my case, the warm, alive gardener (a 5 week stay too). There was a dr who discovewred I was maltreated and said he wanted to help me. He never did, and my attempts by letters and phone calls were rejected by others. I suspect they put me in some bad light to him. He is the best and only one, and maybe I could have helped him with his Polio. His eyes were ruthlessly seeing and alive, no nonsense and efficient man. He watched me from a distance and got me. I am sad. 25 years ago. I send you compassion and good thoughts on your life journey. The natural habits and remedies are good.

[@TheThetruthmaster1]

I think about it every day . I almost pulled the trigger this morning. My wife won't even hug or tell me she loves me ever since I lost my job and to top it off she thinks I stole somethig from her. I took a lie detector test and passed. She thinks they don't work on autistics. Oh and according to her Im A narcissist now too.

[@leilameow9582]

I am sorry for everyone in the comment section. Our society has failed all of us.

[@turtleanton6539]

Disturbing subjectmatter. But good video

[@jesterskully563]

In my experience, I’ve found neurotypical people have no empathy for people on the spectrum and would prefer if we didn’t exist. Sorry I’m such a downer.

[@Soreloser03]

All the love from Berlin. Not looking forward to my 12 year old's (seemingly inevitable) adverse experiences in his future. He was diagnosed formally last week. I suspect he gets it from me. Looking for official diagnosis at age 45...

[@elsh332]

I have BPD but people who know me ask if I have ASD and as times go by I wonder if I have both. I definitely had the symptoms of BPD and I utilised the appropriate therapy for that. I've improved massively over the years since diagnosis, but I still have a lot of autistic traits. I wonder if any studies have been done to see if autistic people are more prone to developing BPD... or if BPD sufferers are more likely to be on the spectrum...

[@Opticaldelusionist]

I failed my son so bad 😢

[@scarecrowprowler]

Is there an antidepressant that suits autists better?

[@sr2291]

If you can do physical exercise, I found that Qigong helps and also a stretching book called Weight Control Through Yoga by Richard Hittleman. There are Qigong videos on KZbin.

[@Catlily5]

It really depends on the person. You just have to keep trying various ones until you find a good one.

[@gothboschincarnate3931]

Bupropion takes the edge off, but its no miracle. I have 2 cats that help too.

[@Catlily5]

@@gothboschincarnate3931 My cat is very helpful too!

[@steveneardley7541]

I'd stay away from the SSRIs if possible. I was on Atavan for years. It's a benzodiazepine, and therefore "out of fashion" because some people make meth out of it. In the US it is prescribed mainly by psychiatrists. I was on a low dose, but felt totally normal and had no side effects. It was less addictive than xanax, and also more effective, because with xanax you would be waiting for your next allowable dose, and that caused anxiety. The worst one I was on was Zoloft--tons of side-effects, including severe depression.

[@sameus11maximus]

Quetiapine. I used it once and it messed me up.

[@MrAdriancooke]

The guy here seems like a nice guy: do you think most aspies are nice guys? I am one and so is my son but unfortunately they say that given the world we live in nice guys are losers. That's why I think it's easier to be female.

[@MrAdriancooke]

Is she from Poland? 🤔

[@MrAdriancooke]

Really who would choose to be autistic? It's true that Elon Musk is one but then his Dad owned/owns emerald production in South Africa

[@Medietos]

the title didn't seem to get answered. or was it me not wanting all the errs and uuhms and tried to skip?

[@kevinrudd1413]

Don't watch it maybe? Find another video. To me, the whole podcast felt just like two individuals sharing their experiences on autism, mental health and what suicide would look like among the autistic population (through their own lived experience). The "foreigner" you mentioned is Polish and doesn't come from an English speaking background, and she's a teenager for goodness sake. She's probably had little to no experience being interviewed.

[@Medietos]

this is not nice to listen to, why not redo it without all the staccatos and eeers, uhms? Or edit? When sick, tired under the ice with little functioning-time one needs good speech, uplifting, good energy. You are both nice, it's not that, but tyhe presentation is important. Just saying. Maybe it's hard to do and you only had a foreigner. I wish her and you all the best.

[@alisonmercer5946]

Didn't bother me at all to listen to it