Autism Documentary: Inside the UK’s only school for autistic girls

Conventional thinking suggests autism mainly affects boys. But more and more girls - and adult women - are being diagnosed with the condition. Subscribe for more Channel 4 News documentaries: bit.ly/LtASif.
Up to 100,000 girls with autism could be still undiagnosed. Keme Nzerem has been to visit the only school in the UK that’s exclusively for autistic girls.

[@servin1419]

im an autistic girl and i have nearly finished my first year of college and seeing these 14-15 year old girls in this school for autistic girls makes me feel really sad because i can tell that 14-15 year old me would've gotten along with those sort of people, but instead i spent my gcses with no friends and in and out of counseling. i now have depression and trust issues and i just wish i had gotten the chance to go somewhere like that. the last few years of school were hell for me.

[@ItsRealyReall]

Agreed. :(

[@dutchik5107]

Ser Vin would've gotten along, yes. but for me, I was diagnosed at age 9, my biggest fear was being send to a school like that. I just wanted to be normal, do a high level of education. (helps that it has more serious people, so it's calmer) it isn't the only type if people you'll meet, I've been bullied from second to 8th grade, in 9th &10th occasionally, by one of the 2 other autistic girls in my year. I go to the level of others easily, for better or worse. I actually now as a 15-16 year old i came out of the bullying stronger. I can 100% say I don't care that I'm different, that I'm not normal and what people think of me. it made me stronger. in primary school I had some great friends. with one I grew away, another one became a bitch in 6th grade, and one I'm still friends with. now I have some great friends, one is autistic, the other ones are just weird, and amazing, but don't have autism at all.

[@madelinedarkhart1691]

I hate myself because I am not the same as who I used to be no more. I was very blinded with what I couldn't see.... reality... fucked up reality. No one really cares about me. No one. Everyday when I wake up, I ask myself, why am I here in this fucked up society? I'm always the second choice, oh and time to put on my fake smile. Then I would usually overthink so much it kills me. I feel pressure and I think i need to fit in but I know deep down inside me that i'll never be good enough. Not even for my fiancee, I'm not doing great, I hate that I have nothing to say and everytime when I talk to people, they just don't listen to me, they don't even give a fuck. I pretend to not give a fuck because I don't want anyone to think that I'm sensitive but tell you what, I AM SENSITIVE, I am tired of being the second choice, I've been depressed for about 1 year 6 months 5 days 18 hours and 33 minutes I have high functioning autism and I know how depression is like, I am a terrible communicator. no one needs me. :C I ruin everything and everyone's lives. I'm a waste of space and mass.

[@ItsRealyReall]

I can mostly relate to what you're saying and I wouldn't mind talking to you if you really want someone else to talk to.

[@ruth540]

Same here for me. I've nearly killed myself so many times, self harmed, starved myself, was in abusive relationships, failed at school, have depression & anxiety, been abused..... you name it and I've experienced it. If only someone had of noticed before I was 13 and my life would of been wondrous

[@bbyskittles91]

Shout out to the mom who kept tying to get her girl help despite the doubters.

[@EADalton02]

My mom did the same thing , didn’t give up on me. Thanks mom

[@jacksimmers1016]

Doctors can be so arrogant sometimes

[@richardling5912]

Love you girl

[@richardling5912]

Yes and no

[@river-fn3hw]

Yea:)

[@Y0KAl]

I'm so, so happy for these girls. They got what I never got to have. My weirdness was laughed at, not with. Warms my heart that they found a place they belong. It took me so long to find my place and to slowly let my true self back out. Dealt with anxiety, depression and suicidal thoughts as a result. I'm just tearing up looking at this. I wish them the best in life.

[@victoriasalter1701]

If you ever need to talk, I’m here for you…

[@wingssj]

❤👊💪♥️

[@chekkop]

How did you find your way? I'm struggling.

[@Icarus_Dee]

“Parents are afraid of labels, but you have so many labels being thrown at you. It’s nice to have the right one.” Yep. 100%. Having the right diagnosis and “label” is so validating.

[@girlsrule001]

it would have been nice to go to a school like this

[@tiffany-chan1235]

girlsrule001 Me too!

[@littlemisswishes511]

I agree even better a care home similar to the elders care homes I would love it most if doctors , nurse and workers would be extremely nice and caring like parents who understands and worked with children with autism or other special needs and mental health and illnesses

[@Dauerschlaf]

Absolutly. With dogs near a forrst. It is perfect.

[@tinx713]

I know, I’m on the spectrum and I really struggle with the school I’m at right now. I wish I was at a place like this where people can understand more, understand why I’m having these thoughts, interests and why I keep getting anxious all the time.

[@alanastone5241]

No it would not. I went to a girls' school and it was boring without boys.

[@hellomew]

this made me bawl. i wish so so so badly i could’ve went to a high school like this. instead of all the years of bullying and misunderstanding. i’m in an art college now that is mostly made up of neurodivergent people and i LOVE it. i didn’t know it was possible to LOVE a place that wasn’t my bed. i wish there were more places centred around autism where people can just be themselves.

[@hellomew]

@@marlenadm5654 you absolutely can! i didn’t realise it was possible until i started at my college.

[@thelynndiaries]

i would have thrived at this school.

[@yoshi7028]

The Lynn Diaries so would I

[@tmf1222]

Me too

[@Lynn-ip9sh]

I wouldn't have to put on a facade at a school like this. I could be me.

[@aleksandrarama]

Same

[@river-fn3hw]

@@Lynn-ip9sh hey I go to this place

[@shibainu3657]

These lovely girls are so lucky, and so jealous! im caged in a shitty, underfunded public school, with teachers and parents who dont give a heck because "well you where only diagnosed at 14, if you've lived with it this long, then you can just get on with it without any help" and its torture, my school days are filled with suicidal thoughts, near breakdowns and hours spent with my head on my desk. i hope that in the future, more schools like this can be opened in other places, so people dont have to suffer like i have

[@beatlesforever7662]

Stay strong, I understand how shitty it is in public schools cause I attended one. It's hell for people like us who are autistic. Luckily I knew about it when I was 4 but I still struggled loads, hiding it was so hard cause all I wanted to do was be myself. I found myself often letting my behavior slip through and feel embarrassed about it. I've left school now and it's awesome, you don't have to suffer much longer if you are 14. Only around 1 more year I assume and you can leave, I know it's difficult but you can get through it.

[@AG-wb3db]

Pompeii - Catf33t never let people take you down. God made you who you are and therefore you are beautiful

[@tinyflyingdragons9432]

How old are you if your around my age I wanna be friends

[@shanniworld8310]

Poor Sweetheart. I am sorry, but it is the same for all women. They don't make it easy on us. You must hang in there and keep making goals. You only need to do one important thing a day to move yourself forward. Make a list.

[@l-m6313]

I’m seeing this 2 years later and realising how similar I was. I used to have panic attacks EVERYDAY and I remember not being able to breathe and getting light headed. I remember self harming and thinking of suicide. I don’t like being touched, loud noises terrify me, etc. The signs where there but I hid them. I thought it was just things I’ve gained from past experiences. It wasn’t and I realise that now.

[@diannehh]

It's sad that in 30 years, THIRTHY YEARS, there hasn't changed much in schools and education on girls with autism....

[@tinyflyingdragons9432]

Its pathetic

[@PeteS_1994]

Even for boys with mild autism. Maybe it's changing now, but as an undiagnosed 26 year old I think the School's I went didn't do an adequate job of testing my for any learning disabilities and never looked into why I was so anxious but kind of blamed me for being anxious.

[@KateFrancis-eo2rp]

Right, Asperger's was put into the DSM in 1987. Why has it taken this long for us to get a diagnosis!

[@rhiirhii8419]

These girls are my people. I’d love to be friends with them, as an autistic female myself. I feel a lot less alone watching this and I’m so happy they’re getting the support they need here that mainstream schools might not be able to provide. Keep shining ladies💜

[@josukulelechannel8736]

I’m on the autistic spectrum. I used to always be open and smile a lot when I was younger, but when I developed depression in high school, I retreated back to my quiet self and kept myself in a shell I could never come out of. I’m always worrying about everything and I never want to be too awkward around people. I don’t want to be considered a freak like the girls used to call me.

[@putinsgaytwin4272]

Same. On the one hand I want to be who I am/was before I got bullied. But on the other hand, I hate how I feel when I act autistic because I’m scared that people hate me even if they don’t say it to my face.

[@healingpalmtree714]

@@mrmemory3.14 what do you mean?

[@franki1990]

@@mrmemory3.14 Yes, we're autistic, deal with it.

[@kenderareawesome]

Really nice its good to see that they are allowed to develop their lovely and unconventional personalities within a space where they can be themselves I think the idea of being able to make friends in a space where you don't feel like a imposter is always a positive.

[@KateFrancis-eo2rp]

Yeah, they just seem like normal people to me. Wish I could have gone to this school!

[@america1888]

There are more girls or women with autism than we realize. Something should be done about this! Autism affects females differently than the males. In the United States, there are 7.2 million children and adults with autism. Being autistic affects people in multiple ways.

[@autisticzuko2750]

Autism occurs in boys and girls almost 50/50 actually, something that has finally been realized.

[@JannesonMultiMediaEditor]

I'm 26 and I just got diagnosed. I wish I could have gone to this school... school was a living hell for me. No exaggeration. It got to the point that people were actually telling me I should kill myself and they meant it literally not figuratively. Some days hurt so much... I wish I had listened because I hate living in a world where I don't belong... So glad these girls have supportive families who paid attention to their needs.

[@BhappyD]

Janneson Don't listen to society. You DO belong in this world just as much as anyone else! Being "normal" is overrated. Autism gives you a unique perspective to offer the world, and it is very much needed. "Normal" people are destroying society. No one was created to be the same, yet society has convinced us that we all must look, act, behave, and think the same in order to be successful and worthy. This is the biggest lie and exists only to conform and control us. The whole idea of "normalcy" crushes and destroys any individuality that we have been blessed with. These diversities and unique gifts are powerful, and that is why those in power want to squander them. Unfortunately the majority of society doesn't have the will to fight against it; they don't even realize that they are being conformed and stripped of their true identity. THAT is what is so beautiful about Autism. At its very core, autism resents and rejects conformity, which is why it can make life so difficult for individuals on the spectrum, because they CANNOT conform. They don't fit the perfectly controllable "normal" mold that the rest of society is forced into, and because they are a threat to the system, they are far too often pushed to the side and discouraged. They are made to feel like the problem, when really they are the ANSWER! So please, don't wish that you no longer exist, because we need you here. We need your unique and beautiful perspective of the world. We need your nonconformity. We need your differences. I am so sorry that you have had to struggle through so many hardships in your life. I can't imagine the pain that you have gone through, and I am so sorry that people have been so cruel to you. But please just know that there are people in this world who value your life more than you know! You have so much to offer this world. God bless you! 💗

[@connieisshort3071]

I am one of the lost ones, and now i'm just going to get lost in the comments. I know i have Aspergers, but even my parents don't believe me. Mum says i just put up a fuss and skip school because i'm 'lazy' I don't want to be lost anymore, i need help.. we all do. And people need to start realizing.

[@georginafirelord2240]

Stay Strong

[@shaihazel2713]

Astarri Maybe try to reach out to a counselor?? I'm trying right now, but I need to gather my courage. It takes a lot of desire and direction to do it. Don't go to that dark place, because most people don't understand and they will not know how to help you. They probably won't want to help you, either. You MUST do it. Then things may get better. Good luck :3

[@hannahsweens5829]

are you diagnosed? usually your parents believe you when it comes from a professional.

[@eibeelee2890]

I'm 32 and I KNOW this is me but my parents also don't believe me.

[@Daisy-uq7qw]

How are you now? Have you managed to get help?

[@TheDogcat24]

Was at this school for 4 years it's not just a school for girls with autism but special needs in general. I'm dyslexic and dyspraxic and started going there in year 8 I was at least 5 years behind where I should have been by the time I left I was only 2 years they gave us the tools we need for life I left back in 2015 went to a very good mainstream college and left a year ago I have just got my dream job

[@aspenparker5855]

UGH that's the dream, man. A school where everyone else struggles with the same stuff and they won't question me if I wanna wear my headphones or smth.

[@river-fn3hw]

hey:)I go here

[@sk8rfrommarz161]

Fr I was lucky enough to get one substitute that actually noticed and just yee smh

[@Flareontoast]

I was diagnosed at 21 and it makes me happy to see there is a place for all these lovely girls where they get support

[@Flareontoast]

aw man, I wish I had had the diagnosis and that kind of community when I was their age T.T

[@ladyconan]

flareontoast same!!! I was diagnosed at 32 :-(

[@mrmemory3.14]

Neither you two are right

[@toribrownell3939]

Whoa! I’m 21 & was diagnosed around 3 weeks ago

[@lucyllewellyn2850]

I was diagnosed with aspergers syndrome when I was 21 I think I would have done better in a school like this, I hated school I felt very isolated @ times.

[@theblinddrummer2014]

lucy Llewellyn i hope you are doing well now hun.

[@mysticloverfairy1]

I was diagnosed at 29 I was homeschooled so never got tested.

[@Alphacentauri819]

I’m NT, and I felt the same way. Middle school and high school were really hard, bullying etc.

[@connordennis1881]

I was diagnosed with autism when I was two had girlfriends it was hard at first but I built my confidence and started to talk to people more and more eye contact

[@vickybartlett]

Sounds like an excellent environment that allows girls and young women on the spectrum to express themselves and a place that celebrates and nurtures creativity and unique skill, things no mainstream school could do. There needs to be a few more places that allow people on the Autistic spectrum to reach their potentials, especially for girls and women. In the right environments, with the right company and the right services, these girls can go on to achieve absolutely anything - be it go to uni, be a nurse or midwife, be a published author, create an app or a video game, or be businesswomen

[@Katyestella63]

I was diagnosed with Autism Spectrum Disorder at 51 on November 13th 2014. I am 54 years age and I am still struggling with life.

[@Jake5537t]

Katrine Basso Atleast you know now

[@velvetindigonight]

Self identified at 61 and now waiting for formal assesment and diagnosis on the NHS . Have been on the waiting list 6 months and when I rang for an update told 28 months to go!!! But just knowing has given me great relief. I'm 'neurountypical' not faulty and that is brilliant after a lifetime of struggling. There is lots of help here on You Tube I really find anything by Professor Tony Attwood so supportive and positive. Good Luck. Hx PS Looking at research 1 in 50 people are on the spectrum we are not alone. PPS Dont forget the National Autistic Societies website and helpline. I'm thinking of starting a support group for those of us with late diagnosis in the UK where I live? I realise looking at my friends over the years that most of them are 'neurountypical' too!

[@calthesocialhermit8945]

@@velvetindigonight I'm 61yo as well. I've been told by several Autistic friends that they all believe I am onr of them. Now, having researched it I can see how it has impacted on my life. Now awaiting a formal diagnosis from Adult Autism and Adult ADHD teams here in Newcastle-upon-Tyne. Unfortunately there is an 18+ month waiting list! I hope that you are well and have received your diagnosis! ❤

[@arch1752]

What an amazing school and staff. Wish there could be more schools like this to help children and young adults too

[@dedchannelrip6857]

I am a 13 year old autistic boy. I was diagnosed at age 10. I showed a million signs growing up but despite my mum wondering why I was so different and wanting to find out what was wrong with me all of my relatives decided to blame it on Horrid Henry and video games. I had an incredibly hard time in school. I was bullied constantly every day from the age of 5. My family weren't any better. If I acted different around them they would laugh at me. I now feel isolated because I can't tell my family about my troubles for fear of my worries being spread out among my relatives. I go to a school now that caters to kids with disabilities and disorders yet I am treated like I'm stupid by most teachers and kids. Teachers who don't treat me like I'm stupid act like I don't have autism at all despite knowing about it, they are cruel to me and have no understanding of my problems and needs. In the first couple of years at my new school the bullying wasn't as bad, however recently it has gotten bad again, but I can't tell my relatives because of (as previously mentioned) my secrets being spread. It has happened before and I still worry about what my relatives may know about my school life to this day. If I try to tell them another possible response is that I've lived with it for 13 years so I should put up with it now. That's so unfair because they don't know how unfair my life is and how I perceive the world and I didn't know about it till I was 10! Of course I had to cope with it all this time, nobody cared enough to do anything more than put me in FREAKING THERAPY! I hope there are more schools like this in future for autistic children in general so no one has the sad life I have experienced. Thanks for reading this.

[@tsargroguthe1st375]

These people in your life are bully's stand up to them

[@N00RAMINA]

You are not alone. I’m 13 year old girl and still not diagnosed I’m waiting in the queue right now but my mum is sure I’m autistic. I’ve been told by various family members that I’m strange as I am “ungrateful” for not liking certain foods or “strange” for getting attached to things that are meant for younger children. I was bullied for years and teased for not having any friends, when I entered secondary I learnt to mask very well and did therapy and in a few lessons my therapist found out that I was autistic. It is crazy how long I’ve been waiting for this diagnosis!!

[@nicugergely6432]

You are an amazing person. Continue to fight for your life. The life is a struggle in its essence. The majority of "normal" persons have various problems, and who's able to diagnose them? The life is a struggle, I repeat. You just have to find that strength in you. Every boy and every girl is trying to do it, without saying anything. And everything just to be accepted by a group or other. And then we become parents, and there starts the problems, because tacking care about babies, then kids and even when they are teenagers, must be done very very carefully. It's simple. Just put love. A lot. Without measure. Love love love and care care care. Where love exists, life exists. Be you. You are a human being. We all are different. And we all are imperfect. Life is too short to not fight for it

[@artistesmith85]

"To different to be normal". Sounds so much like me and my entire childhood. However I have not seen a specialist yet, but I do feel a certain way.

[@kentomologistzz]

These girls are so lucky.

[@jesstuckman5076]

Clopin thank you 💚

[@hannahhhs]

I go to this school-

[@paulinenicholson5338]

My daughter is 54 - I took her to my G.P. when she was three years old as I was aware she wasn't responding to myself, her father or her brother. I was more or less told off and advised she was a perfectly healthy little girl. Despite the education system she is brilliant on the computer, also a talented artist and musician but she certainly had struggles interacting with others and had problems with socialising while she was growing up. There were only two school friends throughout her whole time in the education system. It was a relief to find she was autistic because I really considered I had failed as a Mum unable to understand what was going on. On the other hand her son is autistic - was diagnosed early and is also brilliant on the computer. What pulled my daughter through was the realisation that she had a Father In heaven that understood and loved her and her passion for horses.

[@martinkaczynski8526]

@MsMissy I came from a rich and privileged home. - I want you to know, I was also treated appallingly.

[@triggeredcat120]

@@msmissy6888You sound absolutely dreadful.

[@cbjgirl23]

being able to see girls just like me thrive in this type of environment makes me really happy and excited for them! I go to a school for dyslexic, ADHD, and autism. but this place seems really cool, and it kinda make me wish I lived in the UK

[@emilygraves9724]

Im a girl with high functioning autism (also known as aspergers) and i was lucky enough to be diagnosed at the age of five. For years, my mother was my only friend. She taught me to deal with my symptoms and eventually, no one could tell that i have it. I had few friends that came and went but they were never permanent. It wasnt until age 11 that i met the friends that ive had for longer than ive ever had friends and im very greatful for them. Ive never gone to a school exclusively for people with autism, probably because my parents cant afford it but im happy that i went to regular school because if i hadnt, i wouldnt have met the people that made my life worthwhile. My mother may still be the only one able to calm me down when i breakdown crying (mostly because of anxiety) but my friends keep me happy at school. Now im in my first year of highschool, have 5 a's and 1 b, and am loving life :3

[@whatdidujustcallme]

I’m autistic, born and still living in the UK and wasn’t sent to any school that helped autistic students, it was either a “Can’t afford it” or “this school will be better for you” it wasn’t, I hated my school experiences; I suffered a great amount of trauma during so; the support I got there was mundane.

[@alphanovember]

There needs to be more schools for girls on the spectrum.❤️🌈

[@alphanovember]

@Straight&Proud I went to a special school for children with learning disabilities I do agree with you there should be more schools for both sexes.becouse I went to a nerodivergent school I have better skills in communication and ect. 😊🌈

[@alphanovember]

@@flipflopsofpeaceandjustice because most girls become perants then get dignosed when there kids get dignosed.

[@__julia___749]

​@@flipflopsofpeaceandjusticeactual, the "autism is rare in girls" is a myth. It's just that girls often mask well so their autism flies under the radar. Some studies show there may actually be more autistic girls then boys

[@hiddenbatz]

@@flipflopsofpeaceandjusticeits not rare in girls. Its actually seen more in girls than boys. They are just severely misdiagnosed

[@FindingYourSerenity]

I told my Mum about my problems when I was a kid and she dismissed me, even though she saw them - the meltdowns, the fear, the anxiety, the picky eating and so much more. I believe this is called gaslighting but she just thought I had issues with hormones and would tell my family that. I felt very frustrated. So I grew up learning to hide them and pretending everything was ok when it never was. Here I am at 30 figuring it all out. I wish I had known back then. This month I moved to a new job working with less people that I can be more myself around, from working with lots of other people and feeling constantly overwhelmed for years. The difference is immense.

[@saraharnold1317]

I have been asking for assets for my kids, after spending a year in Sen and coming here. I can relate so muvh and belive I may need am assessment.

[@mayatara1980]

I got diagnosed at 40, because I looked for a diagnostic. I had all the obvious signs since I was 2 years old, but my pediatrician scoffed the possibility as soon as I started finally speaking at 2+. But the stims, anxiety, emotional and social handicaps continued unchecked and unsupported. Many mental breakdowms later and I thought I just couldn't go on without answers, so I looked for an evaluation for autistic adults. Better late than never 🤗

[@user-ev9sw4ee8j]

There is permanent herbs to improve autism. It’s a medicine you can get from Dr Oyalo KZbin channel, his herbs have made my son improve perfectly in his speech and social skills.

[@chloeforde9714]

This is moving me to tears. My daughter of 9 is struggling and really low. Her anger and sadness is deeply distressing. She looks different and behaves so differently.

[@alicelucy1333]

I wish they'd had a school like this for me when I was diagnosed at 11. I struggled so much with mainstream school

[@river-fn3hw]

I go to this school

[@Katy-sh3ru]

I'm 38 and only just starting the process to diagnosis. I suspect ADHD too or it might just be that as there's a lot of overlap. I was bullied by various 'friends' throughout my school years and developed school phobia at 13. I had and have had a rough time with the symptoms of undiagnosed autism (or ADHD) I did go through a period of mourning and anger when I realised that there was obviously something going on underneath that hadn't been picked up on. I really hope that more girls - and boys who present with the 'female' symptoms - get the help they need.

[@Dauerschlaf]

Same here. Diagnosed with ADD, but suspecting ASD as well. Research says that symptoms overlap.

[@nerdgeekcosplay909]

I got lucky my older sister ( a special education teacher) fought our parents and my elementary school just to get me evaluated. Had she not fought for me I wouldn’t have gotten the help I needed.

[@Katy-sh3ru]

I saw a reddit thread that asked if you could go back in time to age 13 and say 3 word sentence to yourself, what would it be? Someone said "You are autistic" and got thousands of upvotes. Definitely what I'd say. EDIT: Except I wouldn't, because I'd not have my 3 kids now if I did

[@TwistDragon]

I was just diagnosed this week, and i'm nearly 24, it really opened up my eyes to why i have been so different.

[@alwaysvergaraa]

I’m autistic and I get really stressed and anxious in P.E but my teacher doesn’t get she just shouts and loads of people are talking and there is loads going on. I had a kinda melt all breakdown once and ran away from my class sat on the field and started to cry

[@caitlinhalliday1154]

Can I slap your teacher?🤣🤣

[@remy9744]

@@caitlinhalliday1154 I'll join you, with a frying pan

[@kpopvenus]

I completely relate to this.

[@komalmononoke]

School was the scariest time of my life. I'm so happy this place exists for these girls.

[@tiiaj7589]

Yep, I’m 40 and hoping to get an assessment this year. I tried for 18 years to get my son diagnosed and he finally has had a very paltry assessment. I’m trying to get my daughter assessed now, and they are “Leary to put a label” on her. But, as mentioned here, she will get plenty of labels, at least this one would give her some support in the right places. I’m soooo angry at being ignored. I’m so tired of misdiagnosese. I lost both my siblings due to misdiagnoses autism. I’m done with not being heard.

[@indigolambart]

I love working with my students on the spectrum. Their focus and insights always amaze me. My younger brother is on the spectrum and at time I have wondered about myself. All I can think is how wonderful it would be to have a company that focused on the quiet, logical way this mind thinks and let them go at it rather than forcing them to "fit in".

[@hellooldfriend3223]

I remember when I was younger I would explain my emotions to people and they would just tell me that I'm socially awkward or that I don't understand but two years ago I was diagnosed with autism and now people are finally going to listen to me the teachers will now stop calling me lazy and can understand what I'm actually going through

[@merdershewrote371]

I wish I had gone to this school 😢 I was a perfectionistic high achiever, never got into any ‘trouble’ in primary school so my autism wasn’t recognised in early life, only got a diagnosis when I was 22. I grieve for the years lost to mental illness and burnout, but I am a stronger person now because of my autism.

[@looneyluna6742]

I'm so happy this is finally being highlighted. I'm currently waiting for my autism diagnosis, I'm 20 in my second year of university.

[@GuacamoleKun]

I'm so lucky I got to go to a similar school in the US. It wasn't girls-only, (it wasn't even autism-only, it was a mix of kids with different issues) and there were only a handful of girls there, but it was the most amazing experience, and I wouldn't have learned social skills at all without it. I met one of my best friends there, and we're still friends now that we're 34.

[@TheDogcat24]

i went to this school it a school for girl with other learning difficulties not just autism

[@rebelliouskace4131]

I was diagnosed with autism last year aged 36 & for a moment it was a relief because I always felt different growing up but now I still have the same struggles I had before the diagnosis. No help or support & I have a 7 year old daughter with autism also, feel so isolated

[@anascarlet]

This is beautiful :') The girls look so happy socializing with each-other

[@crystalhope9579]

wish I could've been to a school like this. 15 and been in mainstream education my entire life. I relate so much to these people

[@diannehh]

These girls are quite lucky to be honest, being diagnosed at 15.. I was 29. My life would've been so much better probably if I was diagnosed sooner.... I'm the oldest at home and my mom has been fighting for so long but back then, no one listened. School didn't even want to get me tested although my mom repeatedly told them it wasn't going so well but school said, she'll be okay when she goes to the next school year. But I didn't. In group 6 I had the reading and counting backlog of 3 and 3,5 years. Meaning I was still on the group 3 level, which is the first year here kindergarten... Not only for me but also for my mom, I was so happy I got my diagnose 5 years ago. It was confirmation that her thoughts were always right.

[@aylahoxenbla1233]

I'm a 14 year old girl with Autism (from Sweden), and i got diagnosed with it in january this year, 2017...I have no friends and i'm always alone at home for myself. Some days i'm just lying in my ber and sleep The whole day... i want to have friend, but i don't know how to... and i don't understand how others just can go to a person and ask something like, "hi, you wanna hang out?" My interest is smurfs. Then i mean that i'm ADDICTED TO SMURFS!This Idea about a private school for autistic girls sounds great! I feel so weird... i always wonder What's wrong with me...

[@larryevermore1435]

Aylah Oxenblå I have a couple of friends and I'm autistic but the only reason I have them is because I change myself to act like a normal person to keep them and for them to like me. Sometimes it can be a good thing to be on your own though because you don't have to worry about friendships and stuff :)

[@uritje]

I know it's really hard to get friends and in the past I thought that it would be impossible for me to make one. But now I have wonderful friends, some of them have autism others don't. If people meet me, they sometimes think I'm very rude because I'm way too honest and don't feel it when certain topics are sensitive but my friends are used to it by now and started to admire that treat because they feel secure knowing that I mean what I say and that there is no other meaning behind it. They also have said to me that when I talk about my special interests, they get happy because they can feel my enthusiasm. So there are also positives in seeing the world differently. Teenage years sucks and especially for girls with autism since it becomes significant that you are falling behind of your classmates in certain aspects and perhaps are further than them with other aspects so it's even more difficult to connect with people. I'm sure you will be able to make some great friends, you just have to push through this difficult situation. I was always interested in they way people communicate and connect with each other so I studied it a lot and it helped me so much with improving my social skills, so maybe reading a book about psychology or human interaction will help you too. Also going to a psychiatrist is nothing to be ashamed of and can helps you lots as well. btw I'm 18 and got diagnosed at 17 if you wondered.

[@binkao2938]

This warms my heart! I wish I could have been diagnosed and not had my future ruined. I ended up a drop out with burnout and school related ptsd still 10 years later..

[@martinkaczynski8526]

I had a similar experience to you. Yet so many people believe school is a good thing, and they seem to think school has a monopoly on education.. - It 's not a good think. It's evil.

[@kassi4837]

I had an eating disorder after I broke and I dealt with severe behavior and trust issues because I had been misdiagnosed and misjudged up until I was diagnosed . I developed anxiety and still have flash backs of what happened the last 23 years of my life before both the ASD and EDS started to be recognized. Not knowing what I really had broke and devastated my family relations . I have panic attacks around my mom because she didn't know how to react to me because she didn't understand me, and this is the same Mom who get so worried sick during my meltdowns and pain flareups she cry for hours or sleep for days in distress. Even after the diagnoses it took years for them to except it and we still deal some form of what looks to be ptsd in all of us. Families who love each other shouldn't have to deal with this . I weep at times over the strain and distance between my mom and I . It hurts everyone not knowing. Luckily we still talk and are trying . I have an amazing Stepdaddy who listens to me mediates between as much as he can . Without him things would be so much worse . My biological dad never gives up on me either and even though things aren't perfect with us it really touches my heart he is still there . I am so thankful for this video all the education going in because other families need to be spared this pain!

[@janinadawn]

I'm so sorry, and this sounds familiar. We are just now figuring out that several members of my family have been on the spectrum all along. I don't know how to deal with this information, but I had a lot of emotional distance from my mom partly because SHE was on the spectrum. I have a really hard time not breaking down myself when my daughter has a screaming meltdown. I wonder if this may be undiagnosed in your Mom as well?

[@kassi4837]

@@janinadawn very well could be. There usually is a strong genetic component.

[@eepmeep8550]

When I was in primary school I actively resisted diagnosis because of the stigma against autism. There was an autistic boy in my class who was the opposite to me in every way and I didn't want to be in the same category as him. I hated being looked down on and felt like I needed to prove myself. I developed social anxiety and depression, which made it difficult to keep up with school work as I was tired all the time and couldn't ask anyone for help. I understand how autism affects me a bit more thanks to YT channels like Yo Samdy Sam, I haven't managed to find any support at college.

[@tee_jay1802]

Im an autistic woman in my early 20s I really could of done with going to a school like that I was constantly having meltdowns in school and was hardly in lessons and I was suicidal and left school with no GCSEs now I have to start from scratch and I feel way behind other young adults

[@kassandralee6565]

I wish I had been diagnosed earlier. I've got my diagnose three weeks ago at the age of 24. I had symptoms of sutism since I was a baby. Nobody could see it. I have now side effects from the masking and still not fitting in. I have panic and anxiety, chronic depression, social phobia, eating disorder, suicidal thoughts and ptsd. If I had help I wouldnt have all these things so drastic.

[@GraysDays0]

actually had a little cry watching this - it was like looking in a mirror back to what i was like as a teenager and what could have been, i’m so happy for them

[@carolynwalker9920]

My daughter needed this school she struggled in mainstream socially and emotionally

[@beatlesforever7662]

I was diagnosed at 4 years old for high functioning autism and I really wish I could've went to this school. I knew I had autism but that didn't stop me from being unhappy about the way I am, somehow knowing I am different just makes it really difficult for me. I understand why I act the way I act and the fact that I can't help it just makes me really unhappy. It makes it difficult aswell because I am high functioning, so high functioning people can't really tell I've got it until they are told. I don't understand that though, teachers didn't even know even when I never gave them eye contact or my body language was different because meeting new people made me nervous and made me rub my arms or fiddle a lot. This school would've been so amazing for me, I would've fit in so well and not been scared every single day of being judged. I fear going anywhere, such as college now, for not being able to fit in or having no friends. I'm glad this documentary was made cause girls on the autistic spectrum are left out compared to boys just because they chose to hide it like I did for loads of years.

[@sweetnsour5661]

I went undiagnosed till 22, now 32 and still struggling.

[@colleenc1993]

It's really bad things have to change 😡 I am 23 & got diagnossed a 11 months ago ☹☹

[@HAL-zl1lg]

Me too, except I'm 23. I've just realized it's been exactly 1 year and 1 day since I was diagnosed.

[@sweetnsour5661]

HAL 9000 It’s nice to read back trough the comments, and to read I’m not alone on the late diagnosis. Hope you are doing well now...I am currently looking for somewhere to live that I can call home, and I now have support from a care assistant Mon-Fri.

[@Andieperry428]

I have been diagnosed and found out just last month that I'm on the spectrum, they think Asperger's syndrome. I'm a 23 yr old female, is there any therapy for asperger's and or ADHD? I went to this health center in town that thinks that I am "not severe enough" or "a normal person." How am I supposed to know if most ASD people will surround themselves with like individuals to fit in?

[@jojomama09]

Sweet 'N Sour same here I’m 32

[@TheAutisticEducator]

I wish we had schools like this for me to teach where I might be accepted as an Autistic teacher teaching Autistic kids. The stigma here in Australia is just horrendous STILL!

[@eleanortaylor4785]

I needed this help I’m still struggling now at 21 trying to get help these women and mothers and teachers are taking sense this is so important!!

[@Confidence_isFashion]

I'm so glad this exists, but sad I never got proper care. They saw autism in me at age 18 but decided not to explore further. It took untill I was 25!! before I got diagnosed. But because they feel I also have a personality disorder I don't get proper treatment. They focus on my intelligence instead of my sensory and emotional struggles :-( And that's why I keep on crashing and need medication again (after quiting with it several months ago)

[@AG-wb3db]

Confidence is Fashion May I pray for you? You are beautiful Just the way you are

[@kerezymaii]

I would love to have gone there, they all seem so nice. Lovely atmosphere.

[@yolo-ni5bl]

I wish I lived in the UK and could go here... no one understands. I am bullied every day. I am so burnt out from everything. I have to mask 24/7. I hate living.

[@shygirlnow2011]

Lucky Girls. Just to have a good yet small school to attend. I am glad they are all discovered and hopefully have more happiness than not.

[@elliecallahan5874]

I was diagnosed when I was 13. That’s when my life started to fall apart. My parents started to treat me like I’m not human and placed me in an alternative school with others with ASD when I was 15. I had enough in that alternative school and broke down. I was put in the psychiatric hospital almost two weeks and sent to treatment for over a year where I thought it couldn’t get any worse. It was, I was bullied everyday, threatened, witnessed fights, and even bullied by the staff there. 15 was the worst year of my life. I’m glad to be out. Unfortunately I’m still in alternative school and have to deal with some similar things. But it’s much easier now.

[@janinadawn]

Wow, I'm so sorry. This is the kind of thing I think would most often happen if we decided all people on the spectrum belong "together". They are so lucky that they are so equally matched, it's unusual!

[@hannahboucher4875]

I have Autism as well.. it's super difficult.

[@Marty656]

Oh, it was so heartwarming to watch these lovely young girls, I hope they thrive in life! I was diagnosed at 35 when my mental and physical health were at a breaking point, found out from a random youtube video. It would have been so nice to go to a school like this when I was young 🥺 but then I probably wouldn’t have met my amazing partner and have the lovely life I got now, who knows what life would be considering the butterfly effect. There is two sides to everything, you have to take the bad with the good and vice versa.

[@caledoniabeautifuleden8584]

My son was diagnosed age 6, my daughter is in the process of being evaluated and finally supported age 10. I am very likely autistic myself and our home is a sanctuary for my ausome children. Unfortunately there is nothing like the school in this video where we live. I am praying that my beautiful, amazing, dramatic, theatrical and artistic girl will fare better in secondary school than I did!

[@bonobobanani3893]

I´m an autistic teacher and I would LOVE to have autistic pupils!

[@Finne57]

These girls are amazing! More schools please.

[@leenaparsons9876]

I'm on the verge of tears. What a beautiful place.

[@SpockLover27]

Currently getting diagnosed and I'm almost 25. I hope more schools like this will form over the years so that we don't go unnoticed by the world until the world is forced to see us.

[@clnbond]

This is wonderful. I'm 44 and only got diagnosed this year after I sought it out myself. Finally so many things about myself, and so many successes in work and failures in my personal life have started to make sense and means I can work on doing some things differently and better. I wish I'd have known sooner instead of having to learn to camouflage so well just to survive, because that too comes at a heavy cost. Thank you for doing this channel 4. And let's hope the are more and better diagnostic teams for women and girls, and more wonderful schools like this coming into being asap! X

[@lisafryer3114]

Hi I am 41 and so desperately needs an assessment for myself . My doctors are not interested unfortunately .

[@fizzy965]

Just been diagnosed age 31. When I was little doctors told my mum to just throw cups of water over me when I was 'acting up'. It really was misunderstood back then 😭

[@debbiethemadbee]

I was around the same age as you when I was diagnosed. Doctors just brushed me aside when I was a child. I had such a terrible time throughout school. It was like most of my teachers had a disliking to me. I got so much bullying from a lot of the other kids. They just saw me as a problem rather than see why there were issues as to why I was a problem.

[@andreasara8876]

this is a brilliant short documentary thank you

[@trancelover1992]

This was such an intriguing and insightful documentary. It is nice to see more women being represented on the spectrum. I am a male on the spectrum and I can honestly say it is fantastic that the level of awareness is constantly increasing. When I got my diagnosis there was very little awareness, I was constantly berated and suicidal by the end of my mainstream high school academic career. Now I work as a teaching assistant in a primary setting and I am determined to make the school experience better for those who do not fit the conventional archetype. I may be one person, but one person can inspire another and so on. This looks like an amazing school, the pastoral care is simply phenomenal.

[@kellymyers1438]

I was diagnosed with autism just recently

[@Darkbunny456]

Colleen Caddick I'm nearly 26 and think I have autism x

[@kellymyers1438]

Hi I was a little bit happy when I got diagnosed i didn't really understand like u say but when my mum explained I was happy and sad but I was happy coz I knew I was going to get the help I needed at school but I was also not happy because I knew I was different and it was harder for me to cope with certain things

[@colleenc1993]

Hi I felt the same I know what autism was before i got diagnissed 😀 How old was u when u got diagnossed?

[@kellymyers1438]

When I was 12 do a 3 months ago

[@KatieM786]

Cutieslimegirl101 Slime I was diagnosed last year at age 32, hopefully getting diagnosed earlier will help you better know yourself and create strategies and tools for the world around you 😊 I wish I had been diagnosed a lot sooner, it would have saved so much distress and struggles. Good luck 😊

[@AG-wb3db]

What a beautiful girls. God bless all of you!

[@__Steph]

This place looks fantastic! I would have loved this school as a teenager. I am one of the lost girls, just diagnosed age 33, life has been a struggle and for such a long time I did not know why I was different.

[@anjachan]

I discovered autism last year. I was 33 too. Im not diagnosed yet but I relate so much to it ...

[@raleighamelia7895]

This is such a great idea! Sometimes it could be hard for autistic people to go through mainstream school. I wish they would have this kinda stuff in America. My sister was actually diagnosed with high functioning autism at age 17 (last September)! So in a way from an outside perspective and by living with someone with autism, this is very informal

[@yellowdog5478]

Raleigh Amelia I have High-Functioning Autism as well, it's hard to be interactive at schools. I'm low on the spectrum so it's not noticeable for me, but that doesn't mean it's easy. And at a school like this I imagine it's MUCH easier to make friends, everyone here looks like they're having an amazing time and I wish I could be there too.

[@lkjhb1]

I really hate living in the USA as a autistic person. We are treated like we are monsters and bad people here :(

[@AnteikuCafe]

I know this school and also my autism doesn't affect me very much. I feel sorry for other people who suffer.

[@kianoakley4522]

I would love to get in touch with one of the girls as I have autism as well. Hope to hear back soon

[@jesstuckman5076]

Edgy Teen 2K17 ah well I wasn’t in this documentary but I used to go to Limpsfield grange and if you want to talk you can ☺️

[@kianoakley4522]

@@jesstuckman5076 hello, hello! I'm am so sorry I'm three years late 😂😂. I completely forgot my comment existed 😂😂

[@gracewest_96]

I wasn’t diagnosed til I was 26 and it’s all starting to make Sense. I’m football mad and my world revolves around BHAFC and nothing else And I love swimming too! I wish I went to a school like this as I was bullied for being different and I know I would’ve loved it there

[@15mice31]

I am 17 and I know I have ADHD but haven't been diagnosed despite being one of the most textbook ADHD 'cases'. I'm now choosing between getting diagnosed and sacrificing the post-grad course I want and possibly the access to the career I want or getting diagnosed and knowing that I will have support in my last half year of 6th form and then into university. It feels cruel that I am having to outweigh the practicality of being diagnosed with a disorder that I have struggled with for as long as I can remember and that has then caused so many other mental health problems over the years. I know it's not the same as autism but I understand the struggle and something needs to happen either within the school system or otherwise where the many many people who slip through the net are caught (maybe just some actual mental health training for teachers? Possibly?)

[@uzi_does_it_2017]

I'm 38 and an undiagnosed male. My autistic journey is much closer to what is constantly being referred to as "female autistic traits" with regards to masking, mirroring, and fitting in. I can't describe the joy it gives me to see these young ladies in an environment that's built for them to thrive and develop with a self awareness I could never have dreamed of. I've only just this year realized and I suspect the scope of individuals with "high functioning autism" is much higher than we think.

[@marcellabrittl6083]

I had autism. Back then Its hard to make friends at my really young age (at my elementary school yrs) I sometimes don't know what to say to them & what their reactions are when I say something to them & all that I think making friends with kids is hard when I was a young girl then I decided to hamgout with adults cuz they're more easier to talk to then the other kids. Also back then in high school yrs when someone ask me how come I didn't drive a car or something like that I tell them about my condition I told them that im autistic or I had autism & finally some don't know what it is, some were afraid of me, some don't wanna be my friends anymore & some ran away from me, which hurts me alot.😢😢😢😢😢 But thank God that I got real friends (from the high school theater) & family that support me, loved me & accepted me for who I am as a shy & quiet autistic artist. 💖✌🏻☮

[@DevonPixie1991]

I finally have a GP who finally worked it out. She saw that mental health services attempts at treating me were simply failing as it was the wrong condition. Now we have to bang on the door. She saw the signs - I hardly ever look people on the eye (on every psych report too) I’ve said time and time again I prefer morning appointments as the waiting room is quiet and there’s a difference in my demeanour if it’s too loud in there. She’s noticed my habit of playing with my phone, my leg tapping, and that’s the stuff I haven’t quite managed to hide, then there’s the lack of relationships and the struggles with them. And the give away to her was COVID-19. I worked from home and thrived because I was away from the need to camouflage/mask. Except I forgot to put the mask back on and have annoyed a few colleagues in the process and this then made me frustrated and this is what prompted me to speak to my GP. The fact she didn’t dismiss it as “personality disorder” (a psych gave me this label in 2016 and in 2018 it was confirmed unlikely to be correct). My advice is speak up and keep speaking up until someone listens to you as one day you’ll find someone who will listen

[@DevonPixie1991]

UPDATE: about 4 weeks ago I had a triage assessment and I've been referred for a fuller assessment but my past of being bullied and abused means professionals are keen to keep "personality disorder" as a label and refuse to acknowledge that my difficulties started before I can remember. Thankfully my mum is going to act as informant and I am prepared to speak up about how I do have autism. The noticing small details others cannot is being put to the test as I noticed a tiny 1 inch scratch on my car that no one else could until I showed them!!! I must admit I know the body work of that car in incredible detail as I am intending to keep it pristine until the day I sell it!!

[@dwaynepitts6545]

I was very lucky. my baby girl was diagnosed on the spectrum at about three and a half. My wife and I had some great lady's at her daycare voice their concern.

[@46templar]

it seems sad that there is only one school and it seems to be a second

[@thebigbookofsketchesshowin8816]

Mark Greenway ik shame there ain’t some more

[@ladielydkyd1281]

I'm autistic and I just finished up my first year of college as a theatre major. I've always been in mainstream public school and the Special Ed programs there, but I got bullied and teased quite a bit, mostly in elementary school.

[@povyi9394]

You guys seem normal to me then that makes me retarded I never finished 8 th grade, lol

[@B33st1ng]

I wish I went to a school like this, rather than being constantly stressed with noises, lights and social upkeep. I got bullied also, but I sorted that the best way I knew how and I eventually became friends with them. Only last year did I realise I was selective mute when younger.

[@MorbidMorke]

I wasn't diagnosed until I was 26. I just hope the next generations can have a better experience and be diagnosed sooner than us.

[@pinkmagicali]

It’s a missing piece. It’s finally coming to light. God I would love to have attended a school like that!

[@DudeWhatsMyNameXD]

I was incredibly lucky to be diagnosed at age 4, even though there is a lack of support for autistic girls in schools anyway I can't even imagine not having the support I've received in school. This school is going to do amazing things for us autistic girls 😌

[@melissasellers224]

Oh wow this so Kool! I really really strongly wish that there were more people who "knew what to look for" sometimes. Because it would be helpful.

[@slyme9343]

I'm a 19 year old girl and I only got diagnosed today. I wish I knew what was going on with me when I was younger I would have been able to cope to much better

[@hl7465]

My son is almost three and has autism. My daughter is 18 months and I'm seeing the signs in her already, however because she presents differently to my son (who is considerably delayed with speech and in other areas) nobody will take me seriously. Thank you for highlighting how it presents differently in girls.

[@Jenn12141983]

I wish I had gone to a school like this...I was only diagnosed this year at the age of 35 and I feel like my life would have been so much different if I had been diagnosed earlier.

[@janinadawn]

Maybe yes, but at the same time I think I may have thought less of myself due to the very stereotypes that were keeping us from being diagnosed.

[@hannahhhs]

I go here

[@campbell953]

I got diagnosed at 21 after an entire adolescence of school refusing, 4 different high schools, having a breakdown in my final year and graduating a year late from home, all with a loving mum who was a dedicated an experienced high school teacher herself yet unable to help me because I refused support. to her absolute credit she insisted I see maybe a dozen counselors and psychologists over those years hoping one of them would be able to name what she couldn't understand but not one of them knew what they were looking at. One day I googled "talking to self autism" and it suddenly all clicked. these girls are all so strong, and I'm so glad there's a place like this out there.

[@garycooper9207]

This is good to see. My daughter is on the Spectrum as well.