Badly Translated British History

I translated Wikipedia's timeline of British through languages with terrible translation quality, this was the result.
MUSIC:
England Ambient Lovely Joan - Civilization 6
The Banquet - CK3
Alba - EU4: Rule Britannia
British Governor / British Town - Sid Meier's Pirates
England 1850 - Victoria 3
Victoria / Churchill - Civilization 4
God Save the King/Queen/Whoever - Real Life
Cam on England scor sum goals

[@giygasattack]

I love the implication that the only reason Britain got as powerful as it did is essentially because Julius Caesar got really fucking lost trying to find Vietnam.

[@Jaskirat30]

the Columbus of their times

[@retardeddragapult]

Rome-Britain vs Han fighting for what is now Northern Vietnamese territory would've been a spectacle

[@hachsstuff]

It also implies that Julius Caesar was the first Romanian in history (cringe)

[@rivvabear9748]

@@hachsstuff Hungarian Propaganda

[@SH1RPER21]

​@@rivvabear9748Fr

[@RomWatt]

It: (exists) He: "Finally! A worthy opponent!"

[@Lanetgm]

It Prequel Leak

[@who-ny5oe]

Our battle will be legendary!

[@Toadfish10]

That is why IT is dead.

[@sascher7461]

@@Toadfish10 I believe IT is still out there hiding

[@Toadfish10]

@@sascher7461 HE will find IT. Remember it's HIS third playthrough.

[@шибкоумнаяоднако]

I feel sad about IT. Just imagine, you're declaring yourself as a superpower, and everybody jsut ignores that fact for 1700 years, until you die. What a desperate fate...

[@venturer9400]

I'd argue it continued to operate from the shadows, plaguing Him with inability to realize His true potential. Once It died, He became godlike in the Cold War (and subsequently took a back seat as ruler of Azawad)

[@Lanetgm]

Maybe this is prequel to IT after their “death” IT went to derry Maine

[@bruh809]

привет

[@robloxpotatotater]

my great grandfather was in a coffee shop with IT in 1965. He was quite a nice dude but sadly he went in a boxing match with HE and IT died after 260 days of fighting around Kent (Vietnam)

[@steppe_dweller_locky]

но аха

[@formerwarthunderenjoyer1945]

it’s canon: in Translated history, kings can revive themselves

[@cpt_nordbart]

Also they are apparently transgender and liked to be addressed as queen.

[@ebonyofthestars]

They also have to wait quite a while (several centuries) to actually ascend to the throne

[@The-Plaguefellow]

"The King is dead, long live The King!" taken literally.

[@bowgart683]

600 year old butt song from hell

[@formerwarthunderenjoyer1945]

@@bowgart683 what is blud yapping about

[@PaarthurnaxXCIX]

Suggestion: Ancient Egypt badly translated, would be so epic knowing how he at some point became pharaoh and then became a monotheist.

[@Smart-vn9yg]

Wouldn't be surprised if She appeared late in it.

[@bowgart683]

600 year old butt song from hell

[@James-2248]

Vietnam lore right off the bat

[@ExtantPerson]

Vietnam is involved in everything these days

[@bowgart683]

600 year old butt song from hell

[@specularverzide9972]

And Romanian Hahhahahahahahahahahahahaha

[@DisKKJ]

2:11 HIS greatest enemy - IT.

[@MusicLabMadScientist]

HE went to Britain to destroy IT

[@wasdered1034]

Also , he was married to her for centuries.

[@leszas872]

How can IT even lose power for being such an important food in South America whilst having an area of 20 km²?

[@Lanetgm]

Hello Georgie

[@埊]

祂之最大的敌人：它。

[@JCCyC]

14:38 Most accurate description of the invasion of Iraq I've ever seen.

[@jproberlin]

Fr

[@stevekovoc3939]

I think "It" might be the reason behind why there's no history in Britain for centuries after.

[@The360MlgNoscoper]

He got to make a part 2 for those 700 years.

[@VegaTheLyra]

This man is finding the hidden lore IT wanted to hide

[@KoopaDash27]

I imagine “It” ruling Britain as if it were the North Korea of antiquity. If it were ruled by Cthullu.

[@Edward-cb5fc]

And whatever happened at 8:47

[@TheTimmynatoRex]

Don't forget 12:58.

[@kashmoney6344]

4 minutes in we already have IT lore, SHE becoming the king of England, and a HE Scottish she/him son reveal, wild

[@valentinaaugustina]

tuesday in my friend group

[@NeoWish]

fate/stay night was right!

[@juliamavroidi8601]

Don't forget the THEM lore

[@Dornan77802]

@@juliamavroidi8601 Afterall, HIS son apparently stayed to help the Americans 😂

[@bowgart683]

600 year old butt song from hell

[@GayAnnabeth]

"battle for water" Waterloo???? dang, Napoleon was just some thirsty boi!

[@swineherd_]

And after drinking all the water he won, surely Napoleon needed to use the loo.

[@GayAnnabeth]

​@@swineherd_nah, he lost that battle, sadly

[@tangtarrtatunogiroscopio]

@@GayAnnabeth you didn't watch the 19th century lore,napoleon won the war and expelled the king of greece

[@man-lv1gd]

​@@tangtarrtatunogiroscopio ah yes, after the dinosaurs did a 360° backflip and gave birth to the palm trees whilst surfing hotdogs

[@ء.ء.ء.ء.ء.ء.ء.ء.ء.ء.ء.ء]

You don't get it, he was thirsty due to loo. So he needed some water (Loo is a dehydrating dry wind in north India)

[@ludvigbergqvist]

13:12 This refers to the LNER Class A4 4468 Mallard breaking the speed record for steam locomotives, which still stands today

[@DiamondKingStudios]

There was a prior reference to Class A3 (formerly A1) 4472 _Flying Scotsman_ being documented as reaching 100 miles per hour (161 kilometers per hour), which would make it the first of discounting prior claims from both British (in the form of the _City of Truro’s_ claim) and American (NYCHR 999 among others) locomotives.

[@That_One_Guy_In_A_Band]

I'm so glad other people noticed these, I feel less like a massive nerd now.

[@jazzingpanda3190]

@@DiamondKingStudiosbrilliant British train

[@HungryWarden]

4:30 “Guilty of peace crimes” is gold!

[@RipOffProductionsLLC]

"Fun times rhymes with war crimes" - Old Man Reacts.

[@TaigaCatOfficial]

Britain and Uzbekistan being involved explains why Uzbekistan is one of the countries Britain hasn’t invaded at least

[@bowgart683]

600 year old butt song from hell

[@Government_of_iroqi]

They didn’t invade cause it was part of Soviet Union not, uhhh….. you know

[@droopythepanda3072]

He. She. It. Them. There is so much lore now.

[@jproberlin]

Wait there is them lore? When?

[@artificialanimeuniverse5063]

Don't forget Me lore

[@ducksongfans]

Why does everybody forget about I

[@kirabad-artist6532]

You lore

[@Edward-cb5fc]

Pronoun lore

[@heihogreenzx4704]

Can’t wait for He’s escapades in African, Russian, Spanish, French, and Scandinavian history.

[@John-v5m]

Yeah I’m really hoping that StarvHarv covers Russian history next.

[@qoombert]

*his

[@tolotos95]

Or German

[@Thete]

@@qoombert He is He's name, not a pronoun.

[@Insert_Bland_Name_Here]

​@@Thete Actually, He's name is Bulgarian. We learned that much in a previous video. Whether his name is just the word "Bulgarian" or if it's a Bulgarian name, we don't know yet.

[@jimb9063]

Some gems here. Love the "not quite's". Bannockburn, Agincourt, and Waterloo as Penang Burgoon, Arkansas, and Water. Henry Bolingbroke as Brooks, and Ramsay MacDonald as Ramsamat. Parliament was also lucky they didn't have to face the raw cunning of Guy Fox too.

[@leszas872]

@@jimb9063 Also literally Dr. Jon Snow (not John Snow) which StarvHarv seemed to have missed.

[@theresahaironthescreen]

Brooks, the guy who gave birth to the throne.

[@official31m]

10:39 SLOVAKIA MENTIONED OMG, GUYS WE DID IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[@donttalktome2316]

THE FIRST STEEL BRIDGE!!!! SLOVAKIA MAKING MOVES

[@The-Plaguefellow]

​​@@donttalktome2316 The first Steel™* Bridge. *Steel is a trademarked name; the bridge is actually made of iron.

[@892ffffff]

STEEL BRIDGE NAD TATROU SA BLYSKAAAAA

[@molhllh2907]

SLOVENSKOOOOO

[@christopherjustice6411]

I feel like “He” is the Emperor of Man or something.

[@АлександрКалугский]

It will explain a lot

[@埊]

和皇帝陛下万岁！ Long Live The Emperor He/Harmony!

[@IamSadThatNoEmojisForMyHandle]

The emperor protects!

[@dean_l33]

Had he fought any dragons yet? Or went to mars?

[@jakesanchez6621]

I always thought of He as just the epitome of masculenity and the indomitable human spirit.

[@sozius0]

11:50 "The virus" being talked about here I am pretty certain is Cholera.

[@MagisterialVoyager]

and "the virus detective" is supposed to be? lol

[@Luciry123]

​@@MagisterialVoyager could have been that it translated from Popular to Viral and then Virus.

[@MagisterialVoyager]

@@Luciry123 quite a journey of a word. thank you for enlightening me.

[@Ahalaya]

11:03 She's considered one of the first paleontologists, so it's probably talking about the oceanic reptiles that she discovered.

[@MetaGiga]

If He can come back to life, so can *It.* Lock your doors.

[@tristan200.]

0:37 Clare lore ALSO RARE IT LORE!! AND THEM LORE!

[@ielnotevsa2997]

5:43 Rare YE lore!

[@dominikkorbely5809]

RARE THE VIRUS LORE!!!

[@PresentFlower73]

There is an Irish county called Clare 🟦🟨

[@prezdough3049]

8:15 also rare Caitlyn Arabo lore

[@VaroXTastisch]

I love this format so much that I can't wait for the 'Badly Translated German History'-sequal

[@garlicdragon8664]

Still waiting for badly translated balkan history, its gonna be epic

[@sarminder4357]

Serbian farmer accidentally started the Chinese Civil War

[@Rov4ni3mii]

12:57 bros becoming Matt Rose

[@Cynicallyskeptic]

Skullemoji 💀

[@taffingtonboathouse5754]

Skullemojiii💀

[@rridderbusch518]

EMERGENCY FROG SITUATION !!!!!

[@892ffffff]

*youy’re

[@SuperTailsMiles]

💀

[@hallowfish9584]

15:45 Camilla is the whole country

[@bowgart683]

600 year old butt song from hell

[@mizukittyakinyama]

as a british person i can confirm everything is camilla now

[@ChloekabanOfficial]

@@mizukittyakinyama Indeed, Camilla. - Also Camilla. (sent from a Camilla)

[@ThatBoiOnLaythe]

-What’s your favorite medieval country? -The Soviet Union.

[@tuomosalo2029]

He and It are destined to clash.

[@HungryWarden]

I don’t know about It very much, but it may be one of the 8 immortals, presumably characters like He or She, that gave up its humanity for even more power. Unfortunately I don’t have much to back this up.

[@brendanhall5581]

​@@HungryWarden He, She, It, Me, and Them, with Them being four people?

[@HungryWarden]

@@brendanhall5581 one of the immortals is some random person, whose name I can’t even remember.

[@The_real_playboi_carti]

Your Videos make me always laugh even in bad times and i am really thankful that you do this stuff. You really help me over stress and negativity. Please do more of these. From a fan: thank you

[@JohnathanacusNope-k4m]

The is really sweet

[@SH1RPER21]

Wake up, babe, StarvHarv uploaded another Badly Translated type video!!

[@Greygoooo]

Rip IT. (Also I can't believe there was no Cambodia mention)

[@venturer9400]

Xtrullor reference

[@chara12345678910]

not even a peru mention... britain has fallen

[@SantaReaper]

glad to see IT getting a body like HE and SHE

[@comparingwarcrimes]

What about THEM?

[@SantaReaper]

@@comparingwarcrimes think this the first time THEM existed

[@howdoipickaname9815]

@@SantaReaper I think *they* used a bomb in 19th century translated

[@Amelia_-qy9nz]

​@@comparingwarcrimes7:00 there they are

[@howdoipickaname9815]

@@Amelia_-qy9nz THEY used a bomb in 19th century history I think

[@Ilikeflowers22]

This is one of the best videos I've ever seen. I can't believe how much effort you put into reasearching the truth and i feel like i finally understand the history of the Uk. You achieved what my teachers couldn't in multiple years in 16 minutes. Thank you

[@Smart-vn9yg]

I think I figured it out: -Time got destroyed, which caused these messed up events -He and She are the anti-heroes of the new destroyed timeline -Justin Matt(aka I/Me)is the time traveling historian who seeks to make sense of the new timeline -It(the new character)is the entity who caused the destruction of time in the first place -"Them" is actually all 4 of these characters together

[@henriouellet8416]

good lore!

[@Smart-vn9yg]

@@henriouellet8416 Thank you!

[@HungryWarden]

Slight correction, but there was a comma in-between Justin and Matt. This could imply that Me/I’s name is either “Matt Justin” or “Justin, Matt”.

[@WaltzerCerealMuncher]

That's 4 out of the 8 immortals

[@mizukittyakinyama]

what if they are his siblings? and hui nanji is one of them? the 8 immortals would be he, she, me/matt justin, it, and them/his siblings. i think camilla might be one of them, too. and maybe clare. edit: alternatively, they might include me/matt justin, but they may be the chinese history video's group of four that appeared towards the end when there was no one there but the four of them, and when they made three trips on foot

[@Kandiifl00f]

Thanks for the delicious *HE* lore, Harv! I was starving

[@artandtomatoes]

As a Scot I can confirm we joined the USSR

[@oliversherman2414]

And as an Englishman, I can confirm nobody invades Kent unless by mistake

[@thescrout9831]

Aye that we did comrade

[@hailexiao2770]

Union of Scottish and Scandinavian Republics

[@baonghita3600]

so none is going to talk about the random ice monster

[@jtohboymccloy1036]

What you write in your History exam when you weren’t paying attention in any of the lessons prior

[@892ffffff]

5:28 forget charli xcx we doing henry xnumx now

[@umhallo]

3:50 fun fact: in the time of Leonardo da Vinci, important books were sometimes chained so they couldn’t be stolen from the monasteries (where many books were kept)

[@asirithwelzorn5907]

Welcome back to Translation Feud, with your host Starve Harvey

[@georgethakur]

8:57 "oui oui whatyadoinmate wheresmebloody armour gone oui" -Scottish Knight Sir François de Leeds

[@anthonyminimum]

3:15 Wasn’t SHE the most famous British birth? So we now have the context for why that is.

[@kashmoney6344]

Never been this early for a StarvHarv, I feel blessed

[@user-nc7jt7fi3u]

Keep making those videos man, I love them 🙏

[@robertjarman3703]

We can't forget the time that He sunk Doggerbank into the sea.

[@cynthiahatterene6739]

Hilarious as always. Still would love to see either german or latin/south american badly translated history in the future~

[@Shoebil]

Can't wait to see what He has in store!

[@ItanMark]

These videos are like the only ones on youtube that have me laughing out loud lol nice work man

[@АнуарКажибеков]

He headcanon (not from the video): He and me are good friends. That’s why when Soviet army captured my wife, he took revenge and destroyed the Soviet Empire despite being the youngest son of the Soviet revolution. Also that explains why he was still smiling there when Soviet Union was collapsing.

[@mizukittyakinyama]

that makes sense, actually! we're figuring it all out now

[@peterpolyglot2294]

The "withdrew from Fran" took me off guard 😭😭😭 I've been laughing so hard for the past 10 minutes I have tears streaming down my cheeks...hasn't happened to me in ages. Thanks mate 😅

[@v.emiltheii-nd.8094]

*0,00002 seconds after Romania gets mentioned.* Here I am!

[@yuritrainspotting]

13:19 oh that’s meant to be a reference to the LNER steam locomotives like the flying Scotsman or mallard

[@moontworks2232]

I laughed way too hard at "Peace Crimes"

[@feiradragon7915]

That is the only crime I'd probably commit on a serial level. Lol

[@the_frogbot8673]

"Henry died unhealthy" well that's one way of putting it

[@papermonkeyminer8116]

Nobody dies healthy. If they were healthy they would not have died in the first place.

[@David10527]

7:04 THEM LORE

[@SpencerIrish]

11:10 I love how slavery was confirmed in England but in the 1800s translated video it said they abolished it ON THE SAME YEAR.

[@swineherd_]

6:30 You've heard of the CEO of racism, but this guy was the founder.

[@gusety]

As always, W video, as a historian nerd I laugh alot in those videos, thanks for making me feel happier!

[@Mr_Valentin.]

6:06 1287 never forget 😔

[@tombblades]

Really enjoyed this video, had me in tears!

[@qoombert]

HE has a bruitish uniform. I am excited for more HE, SHE, I, and it (new character!) lore

[@qoombert]

this is its second appearance

[@Meh57]

William Wallace being described as an anti Japanese militant is not what I expected when I woke up this morning

[@anthonyminimum]

2:12 The beginning of IT lore

[@systrop]

please never stop making these

[@capu4516]

Cambodia wasn't mentioned in British history even once? Perhaps the archives are incomplete

[@v.emiltheii-nd.8094]

Must be one of the incomplete sections.

[@jazzingpanda3190]

This has become some of my favourite content on KZbin 😂

[@shivamkatale5909]

5:20 ussr's nation anthem ❌️ ussr's theme song ✅️

[@lawden210]

1:41 "Golden empire" goes really hard to be honest

[@Haverbrickzer]

The emergency has been born

[@GameBoi-hr8fh]

2:15 a new challenger approaches

[@TheBlueEM2]

12:58 I think this is a mangling of the LNER locomotive Papyrus becoming the first engine to be verified as having exceeded 100mph.

[@BreadApologist]

People in the past were built different, they didn’t even let minor inconveniences like death stop them from becoming kings.

[@oliversherman2414]

Nobody ever invades Kent unless by mistake

[@littleblackcat2273]

@4:42 bonus points for the chest hair of the "Legendary Australian Commander" being shaped like a map of Australia! (Good thing you didn't add Tasmania! :P )

[@generalrubbish9513]

10:30 So in this timeline, the United States declared independence and the UK was just like "Jolly good mates, have a good one over there" and the whole American Revolutionary War just never happened (though apparently, the UK had a completely unrelated war with Uzbekistan over water, which resulted in income tax) Also SLOVAKIA MENTIONED WOOO

[@davidmckendry4491]

i love this.❤❤ Having a bad day just watch this it will make you laugh.Thanks starvharv for your humour.

[@aidantimms7724]

Badly Translated American Civil War next!

[@James-h2z5o]

He did that

[@aidantimms7724]

@@James-h2z5o He did Badly Translated American history. Not The American Civil War Badly Translated

[@georgethakur]

that has potential

[@Linux_MissingNo]

I can already see it, "McClellan saw the wall and ran"

[@leszas872]

"HE was a soldier at a new market." "I became the chancellor of a village in Virginia." "Michael Jackson danced on a stone wall."

[@VegaTheLyra]

I forgot the absolute chaos these videos are lol. We all love this series for that though lol

[@jack101starZ]

15:02 You know, it’s pretty impressive that Islam has only been around for 6 years and it is already the 2nd most widespread religion in the world.

[@cheekibreeki904]

As previous entries established, HE created Islam and built the first ever mosque. I can't remember when exactly did this happen, unfortunately.

[@adnan_honest_jihadist5775]

​@@cheekibreeki904probably refers to prophet Muhammad pbuh

[@cheekibreeki904]

@@adnan_honest_jihadist5775 according to Badly Translated History lore, it was HE. Whomever the pre-translation timeline refers to is irrelevant.

[@adnan_honest_jihadist5775]

@@cheekibreeki904 stop misreprersenting and twisting history we all know its prophet muhammad pbuh

[@cheekibreeki904]

@@adnan_honest_jihadist5775 ladies and gentlemen, you're about to witness a bruh moment.

[@fatesiesifat6034]

BROOO YOU NEED WAY MORE SUBSCRIBERS YOU'RE SO TALENTED ❤❤❤❤

[@Someguyhere111]

"A good job ago" actually sounds like something they'd say in Tudor times XD I think all the long strings of random letters/numbers are probably the translators trying to translate Welsh words. If that's the case then there's not much difference from the source material. Scotland just quietly handing the country over to the Soviet Union. "Ye can have our liberty, and ye can have our freedom!" *leaves*

[@Stfguac]

It's the Roman numerals that its trying to translate. You can leave the welsh alone now

[@YourBluePlanetOfficial]

Henry unalived four! Now I don’t have to get screeched anymore.

[@PoTruBu]

3:26 This is the most british thing I've ever heard

[@Sienna6164]

9:37- This is even funnier since James VI was gay

[@TheBlueEM2]

13:11 And this is Mallard, another LNER loco, achieving a world speed record of 126mph (4468 was the engine's running number at the time).

[@heyseed1673]

Election of Henry the fifth was one of my state's proudest moments.

[@123qua2]

Cambodia Lore please, since Google translate is nationalist Cambodia

[@mybodyisamachine]

History of Vietnam too, would like to hear about Vietnam's colony in America New Hanoi

[@migga86]

When we're already breaking out the memes: Peru must be mentioned as well.

[@steven.silver]

I hope tomorrow I wake up to this thumbnail in the news and everything else has been a fever dream

[@anthonyminimum]

8:43 Stay out of Scottish Church affairs, US Senate!!!

[@MojoWolpers]

Love your Videos, keep it Up ❤

[@petersmythe6462]

"defeated THEM" We finally getting some THEY lore lol.

[@snifey7694]

you done it again, uyou made badly translated hjistory more funnier, i haven't laugh like having weakness in body after extensive laughter since modern history

[@Dreamia69]

Peace Crime ✔️ War Crime ❌

[@sop1918]

As a Brit,enjoyer of history and enjoyed of this chnanel’s content, this is the best video ever although some years have been forgotten like 1914-45

[@ThreeIrishMen]

10:53 if they did this irl ireland never would have rebelled

[@CaribbeanHistory]

The amount of Sid Meiers Pirates music amuses me

[@inverrtedd]

okay guys, new lore character, Claire.

[@ridethelapras]

R.I.P. _It._ A.D. 287 - 1965 C.E.

[@ueIl]

1:11 Who let Galric Jr in Britain bro 💀