Best of Ellen Degeneres - Stand up

[@elementgypsy]

Well, this brightened my day. I think I'll watch comedy every morning to brighten my mood. Being isolated alone is tough and the old Ellen stuff is terrific.

[@AmberDeAnn]

i agree, Element. Being alone and fighting off isolating and lonely every day is tough.

[@laurahall2710]

I remember seeing this act on pay cable in early 90s . I KNEW she was going to be famous one day. Brilliant!!

[@KnowTheTruth33]

Being isolated and alone is not so bad, try being isolated, alone, and being gang stalked on everyday basis.....

[@skyvallee]

I’m so sorry, please be safe.

[@shawnmarie459]

I love Ellen ❤️. I love her old stand-up. The phone call to God is one of the best! So is the public bathroom skit.

[@boblozaintherealworld3577]

Totally agree.

[@Judy-dx6eq]

I'm watching this in 2024. She makes me laugh as much as ever. I texted this whole performance to my daughter. She laughed so hard, she cried. We love love love Ellen!!

[@Beefeater911]

I love Ellen’s stand up. I remember watching her in the 80’s on Comedy Central, when Comedy Central actually showed comedy.

[@williamcushman9295]

love you Ellen, one of the best standups, without being dirty, her best stuff borders on Lennys' digressions

[@rhondaholland719]

Always loved her from the beginning to now. Funny lady !

[@joecarpenter4522]

Even as a pilot, I love airline flying jokes! Turbulence is typically no big deal. The crew will stay away from the dangerous stuff and slow down as necessary for the annoying chop. Believe me, we don’t want to fly through it either!

[@ericcaires6715]

The seats in coach are a fucking joke that why I do first class but I do feel sorry for the people in coach for having to deal with the bullshit y'all need to step up the coach cabin then people will be having a more pleasant flight lol

[@tedhernandez2394]

I love this woman! A lady with class! Ellen D, You do comedy right! Thank you! And thank you homhable!

[@lisaross3256]

I absolutely love her as a stand up comedian. Never fails to make me laugh...

[@nellyfarnsworth7381]

But.... I like set - Down comedy

[@mrbrownbagable]

Ellen projects a certain “sweetness” that isn’t common on TV these days. She seems very innocent, however she is not naive. From what I understand she is a sharp business person.She has become one of the most popular and loved celebs in the world, yet she remains the same Ellen. Remarkable show of character. We can all learn a little humility from this woman. As well a how to be true to ones self, while keeping a good sense of humor. Ellen makes my list of the 100 humans to listen and learn from.

[@CamilleGG451]

Nicely said!! Truly a lovely human being- on my list of "ideal friends I'd love to have, much like Jimmy Fallon :) 😄 - Both humble, nice, and painfully funny 😁 Gonna watch these to keep out of the virus doldrums..... laughter is amazing medicine. Thanks Ellen, ever so much!

[@susanelder7192]

P

[@livselle7607]

Comedians today should take note- THIS IS COMEDY! No necessity for resorting to using gratuitous profanity and sexual content because SHE Is actually talented and creative.

[@CamilleGG451]

THANK YOU! Sometimes I feel like the original voice in the wilderness when I say this to people! 😄 I'm not a prude, it's just that it's so much more CREATIVE when you have to use your brain to create this calibre of humor! LOVE this!!

[@Ratigan2]

I agree, there is an overuse of sex jokes and profanity with modern comedy. But I still think they can be funny if they are used cleverly.

[@theedrstrangelove]

So, after fucking my neighbor on her 18th birthday; I asked her if she smoked after sex. She said "I don't know, I've never looked". Vulgar enough for you? She used a lot of profanity before she got her talk show.

[@seheabol]

Ratigan2 if you watch her show today, it’s 95% sex jokes.

[@lawsonj39]

Profanity and sex can be used very creatively.

[@melaniehawkins5721]

I Love Her & have Foreva and I'm a straight 57 yr old female she is just special no matter who she loves and marries!

[@GARY84ROCKS]

I'm a gay 12 year old male and I think she's just a mediocre talent and the more she's involved in lesbianism, the more I'm concerned about her questionable choices..

[@nicholasgardiner9601]

@@GARY84ROCKS sure you are, STFU you know less than nothing about anything.

[@mexescape]

FLYING DREAM PRODUCTIONS o

[@mexescape]

FLYING DREAM PRODUCTIONS I’ll let pool

[@mexescape]

FLYING DREAM PRODUCTIONS p

[@966396631]

How is it possible not to love Ellen?

[@omikronweapon]

she's meh to me. This video has alright jokes. I just don't care for her in general. I'm sitting here thinking: Why do people go só crazy over her?

[@WitchKing-Of-Angmar]

​@@omikronweapon Because all her jokes are usually always clean (swearing aside), and thought through, and there's a clever pun every 5 seconds. It's so well done.

[@sanctuary70]

Thought i was the only one that thought this WAY. Ellen enabled me to laugh at myself. But Ellen has a special gift for making total laughter out of anything especially common sense...so spontaneous! Love her...guaranteed gut-busting laughter.😙👍

[@graceb7284]

I had an elderly women come up to me in walmart one day calling me Christina, right in the middle of me saying sorry ma'am I think your mistaken she cut me off and says I'm so glad to see you I saw your mom the other day. Glad shes doing well, oh by the way your much prettier than I remember & I just said thank you and have a nice day lol

[@katandpapa]

That's funny!❤👍

[@lastjob2011]

WOW. Clean comedy. How refreshing! See - you CAN be funny without 3 cuss words in every sentence, and lots of sex jokes!

[@Beefeater911]

Joyce Duncan: I agree. I wish Ellen still did stand-up regularly. More clean comics to check out: Nate Bargatze (my personal favorite), Stephen Bargatze (comic magician), Jim Gaffigan, Gary Gulman, Jeff Dunham, Paula Poundstone,, Tom Papa. Brian Regan, Dennis Regan, John Pinette, John Mulaney.

[@lastjob2011]

@@Beefeater911 thanks! Some of these folks I've seen. I will view the new ones You be suggested!

[@Beefeater911]

Joyce Duncan : Nate Bargatze has a 30 minutes special on Netflix, under the 1st season of “Stand Ups.” and a full special on Netflix titled Tennessee Kid. His dad, Stephen, only has clips on KZbin. Dennis Regan, Paula Poundstone, and John Pinette can only be seen on KZbin as far as I know. The rest are on Netflix.

[@lastjob2011]

@@Beefeater911 I will devote more time to LAUGHTER! Thanks. I've written them all down and I am going to make some popcorn. Hello weekend! Take care

[@Beefeater911]

Joyce Duncan: have you checked out any of those comedians? I listen to comedy all the time while I work, or am driving. I can fill you in on a lot of comedians! I forgot to mention Rita Rudner in the list of clean comics (she’s another 70’s-80’s comic).

[@meganluck4352]

when your newer cars have a problem and the window button broke, you will be wishing for that old handle to open the window in the summer, HAHA

[@kayzee5540]

I loved this. I remember falling in love with her on Carson, and forever after. Not sure where the hate is coming from lately. She is amazing.

[@kayzee5540]

Mark 1234 - She is also just a human being like you and me. The supposed terrible things she’s done seem to be pretty mild and the stories are totally subjective. (She forgot that Katie Perry was once married? She insulted Dakota Johnson by not attending her party?). Give her a break.

[@amylee3531]

Yeah I noticed that too. People are so desperate for "news" that they will print anything they can. Any time. I get a notification on my google news about that stupid ellen hate I block whomever the media source is. There are so MANY horrible people they could go after but they try to destroy people with kind hearts. Shes been through enough bullshit her entire career. Leave her alone. Shes so sensitive as well I can only imagine what this is doing to her. Especially being stuck in isolation :(

[@amylee3531]

@@TheTrouserPuppetsOfficial just because people say things doesnt make it true. Those people are getting paid for stories. Not like they are telling it for free. Dinks.

[@RH-tv9hk]

Even the true stories are nothing. Dakota was a bitch to her and the known narrative went that Ellen got owned. Also she sat with Bush. People went nuts. I have friends who have friends I don't care for. I can't pick my friend's friends!

[@christopherchampion5621]

She drinks adrenochrome. And she is part of corrupt Hollywood. You have no idea who she is or what she's about other than what she and her puppets want you to see.

Brilliant, Ellen! Hahahaha! Great standup!! Good clean fun!

[@wymanspace4173]

She is a good stand up. Not many good lady stand up these days.

[@laurahall2710]

Kathleen madigan... best ever

[@631Rodger]

She's very good, never knew she was a stand up comic.

[@barbibrewerhaase6571]

631Rodger, that is how she started her career

[@amylee3531]

You must be young :) Johnny Carson was her first tv appearance. Johnny only invited comedians to come sit beside him after their bit if he liked them. Ellen was the first female Comedian to be asked by Johnny to come over and sit. That was her first comedy goal and she did it. Its on youtube as well. The bit was about calling god on the telephone:)

[@al-xshro9975]

Funny because her stand up career was longer than her talk show and everyone has been thinking she is this talk show mean person. The young folks have no idea how much she has done. She also made history for the Gay community she came out and they tried to cancel her.

[@imommtube]

I am Catholic Im Proud of it and I love Ellen, she is amazing, the way she lives is her matter, I dont judge people who sin diffrenet than I do

[@lawsonj39]

"I don't judge people who sin different than I do" should be on a tee-shirt.

[@clcnj5365]

Ossi imomm You don’t judge people who sin? You just did you idiot! Let me spell it out for you. Implying that Ellen sins (and I’m sure we all know what you meant by that) is a judgment. That’s like me saying I don’t judge A-holes that eat animals just because they enjoy the taste of flesh.

[@imommtube]

@@clcnj5365 You have every right to express your opinion, you have every right to disagree with my comment, but nobody gives you the right to call idiot someone who does not think exactly like you, I forgive you,, nor do I judge disrespectful people

[@rozannmoake8146]

CL CNJ everyone sins

[@omikronweapon]

@@imommtube I'm glad you are comfortable with Ellen leading her life as she wants, but I don't think you've qúite understood the issue though. 'We' atheists don't mind so much that you judge our lifestyles, but more so the fact that you read a book that states that our lifestyles ARE sinful. Everybody judges other people, that's just human nature. It's when you start writing your observations down and calling it wrong, where the problems really escalate. You're failing to see that both yóur opinion and the religious text or your choice, are opinions. Not facts. It's not a question of "well, I don't judge sinners", it's a matter of "sinners don't exist". Or, if you prefer, "everybody sins". Depending on the source you use, everybody, including yóu has sinned. Perhaps even subject to original sin. Some religions (did) prohibit watching TV, and by extention, internet, so even by wátching Ellen (or anything else), people can be considered sinners in some religions.

[@CarlosGarcia-rm6zu]

Daaamn...ellen is a bad ass

[@amybuckwalter6047]

Ellen.. is sooooooooo. Funny. I love her

[@BakedSalmonNetwork]

I forgot how funny her stand-up is.

[@scottmurdock01z]

I LOVE Ellen. My favorite comedienne, followed by Margaret Cho. Not too high on Sandra Bernhard.

[@sadespain2339]

The Nelson Mandela quote is actually a quote by Mariann Williamson in her book Return to Love. It's often misattributed to Nelson Mandela.

[@asko222222]

I didnt know Ellen was in stand up comic before she started with tw shows, she is very good, and she have very interesting way of comics, respect.

[@omikronweapon]

Took me a few years to realise that éverybody on sitcoms and talk shows basically started off as comedians. Well, everybody that has some form of succes in their media, anyway.

[@briangatlin8216]

"You can't get these on the ground." 😂

[@shearonsam925]

I Love Her...

[@user-zk3xg9ou1x]

And Ellen will always brighten your day.

[@jaredfroehlich5856]

I feel bad for the spider that I killed this morning in my bathroom 😫 28:50

[@karenjensen9089]

Love Ellen

[@toddh2696]

The reason why people bitch about the seat reclining here in 2020 bfp is because the seats were so worn they don't recline back slowly as if it is unnoticeable to the passenger behind you. They actually don't go back to upright position anymore with unless the flight attendant smacks it back up for you.

[@neroknight1234]

Lol damn i love her jokes shes clever and unique

[@CamilleGG451]

Exactly!

[@ayandaanele734]

🤷‍♀️ why does this type of comedy show on television because it's actually funny

[@burmeisterjoe725]

I didn’t know airplane food jokes were real.

[@Mscldrew]

Burmeister Joe they were in 1992...

[@tch4874]

It was a different age then. Sigh*

[@joineejones4935]

What is airplane..

[@omikronweapon]

I do wonder if it's dated or just American airlines that most people take that have this effect. I've néver seen peanuts on flights, and my meals are always fine. No haute cuisine, but certainly not terrible.

[@ddsofine13]

Incredible through and through!

[@bowiekt]

Soo relevant:)

Ellen is probably one of the 5 best comedians in the last half century. I rank her right below Richard Pryor and George Carlin. Brilliant work!

[@sonjar1853]

Yup!

[@elainevankat5353]

OMG!🤣 Ellen is hilarious! And, she’s a beautiful person too!♥️

[@carlgreisheimer5278]

I very rarely ask a person a "how are you"? Because I feel it is somewhat of a phony ass form of salutation. To me a hello, hi, good morning, good afternoon is more sincere and appropriate.

[@sylviabryan9643]

Agreed

[@marcierose5098]

marianne williamson quote not nelson mandela, common mistake. fun stand up!

[@user-zk3xg9ou1x]

I'm isolated and I watch comedy all thre time. George Carlin, Ron White, ellen, paula Poundstone, Rockstar(talking animals) anyone that makes me laugh.yay!

[@steelethescene]

Helium

[@WitchKing-Of-Angmar]

She was so pretty. She's still pretty today it's just that people forget that she's older now, and keep thinking she's young. Same with Lucille ball.

[@usmantarar1865]

Bad ass Ellen

[@Expose_bankers_and_auctioneers]

What year was this, please?

[@prefershe]

Hi, 1992, 2003 and 2000. Since you said please 😆

[@normanhowell3994]

Get that out of here ,I don't want that sh*t , six peanuts..😂

[@carlgreisheimer5278]

She reminds of Jerry SIENFELD in some sort of way.

[@kichigan1]

Clean situational comedy that we can all relate to.

[@JohnnyWishbone85]

It's hard to overstate how influential he was in the late 80s and early 90s.

[@cedricgist7614]

I can't help it: I've always liked Ellen.

[@michelehice8338]

Ellen is amazing..love you funny lady

[@pocahon8460]

Ellen I love you you are just so spot-on except for this it wasn't Nelson Mandela that said that it was Marianne Williamson

[@bellavampyre425]

lol... There is only 1 Ellen D. lol naturally funny comedian.

[@DanHull817]

40:58 best bit of the gig, imo.

[@underhero10]

HER. HAIR.

[@rebeccatranquility960]

Penny Marshall! Love Laverne!

[@sabgensollen]

To the points!!!

[@joshmad3848]

I feel like Ellen and Jerry Seinfeld could do either of the others' material and nobody would even notice. They both have the same style. Love them both. There may be an alternate universe in which they got married and had the most hilarious sarcastic children ever.

[@zyzir]

YUUHHHH FR😂 LIKE JUST IMAGINE THEIR KIDS😂

[@TheSimoprince]

I forgot : and leave the aeroplane

[@beastmaster73beyondo64]

Lol

[@rohitrangwani3345]

When zakir khan says hmm acha theek hai, now I know ellen did it first😂

[@noragarza8628]

Witty

[@dennis2966]

So she's standing there, wearing a dark navy top and black slacks. Then they cut to an overhead shot. Suddenly she's wearing a blue top and light gray slacks. And then, miraculously, she's once again in her navy and black outfit. She's not only a comedian, she's a magician. Pause the video at 18:24.

[@laurahall2710]

Clever to notice that

[@user-gx5kr9gg1k]

She's hilarious!)

[@SuperScottCrawford]

She looks like she was a foot taller then.

[@laurahall2710]

She was. We shrink with age

[@laurahall2710]

Shes 5 foot 6 now

[@NoName-gv1sg]

Thinking the same!

[@omikronweapon]

@@laurahall2710 people shrink about an inch, maybe two. not an entire foot. It's more likely due to her clothing style, possibly weight, and the fact that she's standing on an empty stage, without any reference to her height.

[@dinosherman2215]

I see the irony in"Its pointing away from -H-ATE".Psychiatree Psychiatricks.Dino Sherman.

[@cherylmanier567]

Is that Diane Sawyer in the audience? 11:21

[@jennifertoochi4397]

I must say I love the way she referred to God as a black woman..bcz the statues and the pics of Jesus we always see is that of a white man with beards lol..

[@omikronweapon]

lol. Got as far as the "and there's no silence, just constant talking" bit, skipped ahead éxactly to "I think people talk too much anyway". Pretty ironic for a comedian turned talkshow host.

[@Sonsbitchesall]

… can’t get these on the ground… LOOOL

[@RH-tv9hk]

😲Is it PEAS?!

[@rareELL]

Amy schumers base form

[@carlgreisheimer5278]

I hate that 4 letter "F" word more then any other word in the ENGLISH language. You know the one......"FINE"!

[@kaa6734]

fuck that

[@lidyanyong2598]

Ellen I loved all the jokes but about God that's outrageous

[@lorilerner3575]

I'M SO LOVING ELLEN.... WISH I WAS PRETTY TO GO TO HER SHOW. I'M VERY POOR HARDLY BREATH AND DON'T HAVE MUCH 🐩🐅 🦏 FOOD. BUT I HAVE A FREE OBAMA PHONE 🍉 TO WATCH THE MOST BEST 💜 ENTERTAINER BESIDES ELVIS PRESLEY 🐩🐱🐅🐆

[@lorilerner3575]

LORI LERNER 818_401_3772. LOVE'S ELLEN DEGENOUES 🐶🐒🐱🐅🐺🐩🐰🐹🐁🐷🐀🐦🐧🐋BEST 💜💚 ❣️💚❣️ ENTERTAINERS... BESIDES ELVIS PRESLEY 🐩🐰🐹🐹🐁 🐷😙 💜💚 ❣️ send

[@AlanGonzalez-ev6ur]

@@lorilerner3575 🅱😣😤💓🌟😞🌟😷😵😁😞😁😥😚😪😘😞😂😒😔🐺🐼🐯🐼🐤🐔🐨😃😞😚😞😁😣😂😰🏭🌄🗽🏩🌉🔼🔤⏬🔤⏬⏬⏬🔄🔽🔤↩🔣↩↩🔄⏫🔄⏫⏫🔤🔽🔤🔽🔡↩🔄↩🔄

[@jc16781]

LORI LERNER are you on drugs ?

[@sarahlizze865]

@@jc16781 probably 😂

[@LoveAsianCulture]

@@jc16781 are you empathy deficient?

[@eleanorpartee8267]

23:02 35:15 16:35

[@jaiguru8487]

Shes some gal🤣✌✌✌

[@LoveAsianCulture]

Was born a boy tho

[@jaiguru8487]

@@LoveAsianCulture was not🤣

[@TheDarjas]

and now there is poo-pourri

[@chrismomo1977]

byyyy mennen

[@bd5035]

Beck when she looked human

[@usmantarar1865]

Of course you are weird

[@TheSimoprince]

Why can't we have a parachute that way everyone could jump and the aeroplane don't you think you reader?

[@amylee3531]

Too bad everyone would just tangle up when and then definitely die instead of just possibly dying.

[@omikronweapon]

also because it would take up so much room, for something to only gets used once every thousand flights. Any space you can save can be used for more passengers and more profit. Unless you'd like to be told you cant have any carry-on luggage, because that space is reserved for a parachute you're almost certainly not going to use. Besides, people don't listen to the safety talks nów. How are they gonna figure out a parachute in utter chaos? Not to mention the room it takes to put it on. You'd all have to stand up to even get the thing on your back. Grabbing your bags takes an hour as it is, let alone if you have to strap it on your back as well.

[@inexperiencedladywithagun7851]

Back when she was funny and nice- the original Ellen

[@hicks727]

33:30 I wonder if she remembers saying this in the age of the cancel culture and " silence is compliance"

[@bellzylol]

pantene shower commercial gogurt and dill pickles

[@user-kp2td4cq5f]

I like ELLEN on the chat show but stand up I don't laugh at all

[@TheTrueMariWho]

I am going to revisit this comment section after the world finds out what Ellen has been doing.

[@RH-tv9hk]

What has she been doing?

[@TheTrueMariWho]

R H it is easier to swallow the truth, when you find the answers for yourself. I know, for many years, people tried to push the truth onto me, and it only pushed me away, until I started researching, and now I completely understand what they were telling me. It is really disturbing what the entertainment industry has been doing for way too long. Happy Hunting R H.

[@RH-tv9hk]

@@TheTrueMariWho eh, I don't care enough to find out but I wouldn't be surprised about anything that would be revealed involving the entertainment industry

[@TheTrueMariWho]

R H I am sure eventually it will be exposed soon enough, like Bill Cosby, Kevin Spacey, Jeffry Epstein, and Harvey Weinstein.

[@WitchKing-Of-Angmar]

​@@TheTrueMariWho Thanks for being vague and not answering a SIMPLE question.

[@danae1326]

Back in the day before Ellen was an elitist snob who treats everyone around her like crap. I have always been a fan until I heard how horrible she treats people on her show and fans who try to approach her.

[@katandpapa]

Exactly what I was thinking! I could care less that she's gay, it's the quality of her character that keeps me from being a fan....great comment...🥴👍

[@jimedwards2666]

I did not like you. First of all, you are a gay woman. It made my skin crawl. But over the years, you got inserted into my life. I have found that you are compassionate, caring, giving. You seem to be really intelligent. Oh, and you are really funny. Thanks for turning me around.

[@jocelynjohnston8257]

What the Hell is wrong with you? Gay people make your skin crawl? Have you looked in a mirror, mate? You're one to talk.

[@omikronweapon]

@@jocelynjohnston8257 take a second to read the entire comment before spouting your venom. You're part of what's wrong with the world today. People with good intentions but too short of a fuse to actually take time to THINK.

[@altonwilliams7117]

Back when she was tolerable.

[@bloodSCARSandMCR]

My sentiments exactly!

[@RH-tv9hk]

I love the 90s comics. Joy Behar and Rosie O'Donnell did excellent stand-up before they became liberal nutcases.

[@omikronweapon]

probably a side effect of fame. Why do we as an audience even allow performers to influence us so much outside of their performances? They can act, or tell a joke, that doesn't make them experts on everything.

[@williamm4812]

Hey, has anyone else noticed that Alan Degenerate, although very buff and masculine, almost has a little semblance of feminine features?

[@KSfan4ever]

you are an idiot

[@kayzee5540]

Why, are you threatened?

[@barbibrewerhaase6571]

Haters gotta hate! Not acceptable! She is an amazing person! Kind, funny , natural comedienne!

[@amylee3531]

Shes beautiful! Think your seriously jealous that her wife is so hot. Get a life

[@zyzir]

like her or not, youve gotta hand it to her, one of the only funny women up there with julia louis-drayfus