Polishing Turds at Work - Best of SleepyCast

"How many jobs have you guys had through the years?". Tomar had a job at 14 at a love pillow factory. Jaxxy worked at replacing carpets. Zach worked at Arby's and polished turds (his boss had a high standard for turd polishing) . Chris worked in his dad's shop. Chris' mom looks like a female version of him. Chris wears guitar hero shirts and shirts from GameStop. Mick will pay someone to mail in Sonic The Hedgehog underwear for Zach. Chris doesn't get served alcohol when he wears those shirts. Mick worked at a club as a doorman and gave the girls candy and soda.
Audio is from SleepyCast Episode 26: / sleepycast-26-horny-go...

[@Grayfox988]

"Tomar what would you do if one day you came home and Jaxxy grew bird legs and tore up all your carpets with her talons?" "I guess I'd be pretty upset."

[@vfxninja5503]

"Tomar what would you do if we all ritualistically murdered Jaxxy with serrated daggers?" "I'd call the police?"

[@tdata545]

Tomar is going to definitely have his Jack Torrence moment. Jaxxy's going to be picking up around the house, and see that Tomar left a compiler open and read the comments he left in the code that goes on for 1,000,000 lines; "All work and no play makes tomar a dull boy" Then Tomar slides into the door frame without ANY SOUND to confront Jaxxy, startling her.

[@KuonilerariLoufanwald]

@@tdata545 "Jaxxy, darling. Light of my life. I said I'm not going to hurt you. I'm just going to bash your brains in. I'm gonna bash em right the fuck in." But read that in the Tomar voice

[@tdata545]

@@KuonilerariLoufanwald One of the hottest romances ever caught on film. Jake and Vicky aint got shit on Jack and Wendy.

[@Tom-jy6mc]

Tomar would be upset because his pee stains would be revealed

[@sticklyboi]

"anything can be a septic tank if youre smart enough" ~ zach hadel, professional gremlin creature

[@Scallycowell]

I know the pillows Tomar is talking about. It’s crazy that his dad invented those things. I got my second dog pregnant on one. Crazy trivia!

[@OrangeYTT]

what's it called?

[@joeygreen8091]

YOU got your dog pregnant?

[@Scallycowell]

@@OrangeYTT It's called a Liberator, I believe.

[@IntegerOfDoom]

What about the first dog?

[@KuonilerariLoufanwald]

Dude really be bragging about how he fucked his dog on a pillow

[@antijelly885]

I crave the peppery taste of an aluminum can

[@Battlefieldfan146]

Butt Function Romance just a pepmint tea for me

[@ccda3324]

I crave the delicious fruity taste of Fruity Pebbles™

[@Estinus]

The shredded cardboard flavor of multivitamins for me please.

[@connor48880]

“You know these were white when I bought ‘em”

[@FriezaSucks]

Warehouses are better than retail and fast food imo. Don't have to deal with people other than your coworkers and you're busy all day

[@sacredstarlight9446]

agreed

[@scientificbrony]

Agreed. But, I now do hvac so we are in people's houses, but usually they vacate the area and it's just me and my partner

[@goldenboy9748]

I liked mowing lawns as a kid just listen to music and drive around yards

[@Corkoth55]

not to mention all the weed smoking.

[@garybrown2039]

Just make sure you are careful with the forklifts.

[@smincesmeat316]

I was studying... but this is clearly more important

[@monononny3974]

You best finish your Kekistani cultural studies before the deadline though

[@monononny3974]

"That is honestly like a Twilight Zone episode," It's honestly not Chris. It's honestly not at all.

[@JarJarBinks4ever]

ur wrong

[@BubJeans]

No you

[@skweezee]

Then who is it?

[@jackrichardson4089]

Imagine if you will

[@SpikesSpikesSpikes]

@@JarJarBinks4ever ur gay

[@ashersligh]

Why is it that Jacksie and Waffle always sound like they're in another area code away from their microphone?

[@BubJeans]

Asher Sligh nerves?

[@warblenoise]

@@BubJeans Yeah whenever I get nervous I'm immediately propelled backwards 2 - 3 miles form my original position by a mysterious force

[@furfixer]

They had to sit in a special cage away from the boys

[@drumboarder1]

Having googled tomar n jaxxie, I assume they have the mic at a height at head height and jaxxie is towering too far above

[@diddlenfiddle7311]

@@warblenoise I read that in Zach's voice.

[@AceAttorny]

Zach fucking pounced on that tearing carpets up joke.

[@dummyproductions4281]

"To- to- tototoDAY junior, *_that's a little reference for you_* "

[@ItsJustMilkISwear]

my mom had those sex pillow things when i was little, but i didn't know what they were for and i used to play on them a lot.

[@videonmode8649]

Name checks out

[@coreytran7415]

@@videonmode8649 jesus christ

[@MDMDMDMDMDMDMDMDMD]

So did she

[@borntopwnyou]

15:40 W E I M E R I C A

[@dutchmountainsnake5379]

fuck it man

[@burch4267]

I love how jax said “asshole”

[@mockbadge5765]

Note to self: never eat to one of these ever again

[@Lucaccino17]

Ah whatever, those curly fries are still delicious

[@swf_buccellati2098]

Dang, these two other replies didn’t understand that you were talking about eating while listening to sleepy cast and thought you meant Arby’s lmao

[@mockbadge5765]

@@swf_buccellati2098 holy shit this was two years ago yeah these mfs stupid as hell

[@BanilyaGorilya]

6:55 Polished Turds Memories

[@Nisom630]

holy shit I live by that deja vu

[@YoUtUbEhAnDlEsArEgReAt]

What the fuck Tomar sounds so different when he talks at a regular pace

[@thepinkestghost]

Oh snap, I worked at Dream Girls SoDo and now Dream Girls Rick's in Washington inside taking admission. Security for both must have sucked because no one was ever given tasers.

[@PurpleFreezerPage]

"So this stripper girl trapped herself in that job because she raised her cost of living so much. She couldn't go to college like she planned" "Well good for her for working so hard, I guess" What???? That shit's not good.

[@PurpleFreezerPage]

Mecha Sonic 1994 You’re should be more empathetic. It may help you be happier.

[@sticklyboi]

it is funne

[@Y-two-K]

i love hearing these guys tell stories and goof around without video games (but I do still love me some oneyplayly). too bad it's over :(

[@ethyn1592]

its coming back

[@Kovac22]

I ALMOST FUCKING DIED DU*RING THE BUSINESSMEN CIGAR TURD THING

[@voids4818]

Holy shit. I know what strip joint he’s talking about! I drive by that place every single day on my way to work.

[@MrShedom8]

Whelp you know what they say, Deja Vu: i've just been in this place before

[@imded1934]

oh hey an icelandic name

[@MrPainkiller616]

"Hardhat" jobs are just as bad. The people that can't get into retail because of their looks or mannerisms in public usually end up at "hardhat" jobs, AKA construction, tree work, public utilities, etc

[@troubleinbound]

I find those jobs more rewarding than retail tbh. Having worked both I can say that I'd rather be swinging a hammer all day instead of standing behind a counter getting fat.

[@ZzShy]

Hard hat jobs usually pay pretty well though

[@troubleinbound]

@@ZzShy truth

[@denaharbison1295]

You could operate a Crain at a construction site and make about 80 dollars an hour

[@yosh9192]

The funny thing is that I know that exact Deja Vu he’s talking about Even weirder is that several people in the comments also know about it. Small world, huh?

[@hellxbabie764]

i love this

[@diyahwilliams8008]

Plenty Sorrow q

[@ZacharyWhittall]

also i understand what it's like being in a shitty job where you do the job of 3 in one stupid establishment, gross and feels so bad

[@chgerhardt]

AQUIFER...

[@zentofroez]

Fucking had me dying in the first thirty seconds

[@travismcnasty4239]

WA strip clubs are terrible.

[@Rangernewb5550]

Travis McNasty Can confirm

[@blueredbullbabyohyeah3179]

Now this is a fact

[@nothingforyouhere418]

Dont ignore the truth. Face it.

[@tdata545]

Ia Deja Vu national? I just assumed that was like a local IL joint. Didn't know there were "stripclub" chains.

[@BigBrosFilms]

Why does Chris pronounce Sybian so weird 😂

[@drumboarder1]

Ray Romano

[@bettya.k.abetty8259]

Mick was thinking about a trap. Its a layer of water that keeps the doo-doo and pee-pee smells from wafting into your home

[@p.l.6397]

Aquafer

[@ZacharyWhittall]

the girl sounds like corey but girl

[@denaharbison1295]

It’s jaxxy I think

[@joeygreen8091]

@@denaharbison1295 that poor poor woman living with “Him”

[@JimMilton-ej6zi]

Of course joshua "Ashkenazi" tomar's job involved being exposed to nsfw things as a minor.

[@LinusBitchTits]

man you should get out more

[@JimMilton-ej6zi]

@@LinusBitchTits Maybe if you did you'd be able to understand what jokes are.

[@chaisebearr.8552]

these comment sections...

[@TheTrueNehme]

"Good for her for working so hard." Was she not listening at all for that story. The chick literally blew all her fucking money, lost her house and car, making getting to college that much harder for herself. But yeah, good for her I guess.

[@IISilverSoul24II]

I mean she did work hard, didn't say anything about her financial decision making afterward

[@Josh-ml5bc]

Is that a girl???

[@SpookNukem]

no its zach

[@Spidf]

*breaths profusely*

[@austinfaber2247]

Awooga

[@blueblur9877]

who’s the one that sounds like a lesbian woman who talked about the cat lady carpet?

[@blueblur9877]

Wosloy Waltrip the dead woman sounds like a lesbian?

[@messitupmike8061]

Jaxxy. Tomar’s wife.

[@ccda3324]

this is possibly one of the most buttfucked retarded comments I've ever laid eyes on.

[@ccda3324]

@@TheFrenchmanCooks lol how? His comment makes no fucking sense