Building a home as WOMEN IN A MALE DOMINATED INDUSTRY - WITH MY OWN TWO HANDS | XO, MACENNA EP. 12

[@maryphillips5173]

Loved todays podcast. I am a 72 year old woman who owns a roofing company. I ran the business for the previous owner for 8 years before buying the company from him in 2006. I can sooo identify with the conversation today. I am a Southern lady in the Denver market. I have gone through the preconceived ideas that #1 a southern accent means your unintelligent and #2 being female you have no clue what's going on. I, like you, always start out very nice, until it's time to be stern. My estimators have always joked that I have two names. Mother Mary, because I care for everyone and Mean Mother Mary when I am forced to exercise my authority. I admire you so much and constantly watch in awe of what you accomplish. You are a wonderful inspiration, as is your Mom, for all of us out here.

[@jokeith1722]

so why is it that women have to be called 'mean' when showing authority? Men are not categorized for being stern? lol

[@karenstevens5041]

Storytime! I worked in a big box hardware store all through out college and was working the building materials desk - aka the “Lumber Desk” and a man came up to the desk and asked if someone could help him with a few questions. I replied, “Sure, what’ch you got?” We went back and forth a few times, with him not believing that I knew a damn thing and getting frustrated that I “wouldn’t” call some “real” help. He finally asked for a manager. So, I paged my manager to the desk. My manager, Lee, showed up in his best used car salesman three-piece suit (this was the 80’s, mind you). The man proceeded to ask his question and Lee looked him straight in the face and told him, “Huh, that’s a really good question, I don’t have a clue, but I’m sure Karen can help you out.” And walked away! The man turned BRIGHT red and walked out of the store, and I never saw him again. Regarding men coming up to you in the hardware store offering you help…. MY guess is they see a cute girl and are shooting their shot. They would never do that if Romeo was there. That being said, I’m sure there is some sexism going on too, but give the poor guys the benefit of the doubt - at first. Take it as a compliment and your mood will be able to stay your normal bright and cheerful self! 😊

[@MegLancaster9]

This episode was so therapeutic for me! I can’t thank you both enough for sharing your experiences; it makes me feel like I’m not alone. I’m a Designer at a store that sells hard surface flooring, tile, installation materials, tools, etc. The sheer percentage of customers who treat me rudely and disrespectfully - simply because I’m a young woman - blows my mind. Every day, people dismiss me, mansplain to me, insinuate that I don’t know what I’m talking about, assume that I can’t lift products, or just straight up insult me to my face. I always try to respond to them assertively but politely, but it has been taking such a toll on me. Thank you so much for motivating me to genuinely own my abilities and to create beautiful spaces! I never miss an XO upload, and I can’t wait to see what new projects you develop over time! To the whole XO MaCenna family: you are an inspiration.

[@aubreyjensen4170]

I've been renovating my house for 5 years. (6 kids) My hubby helps with things when needed, much like Romeo. I needed a new table saw so we went to the "L" (big box store to get one. On the way to the check out, this older man looks at my husband with a big smile and says " someone's getting a new toy!". My amazing hubby takes a step back smiles the biggest smile points to me and says, "yah...her!" This man was so shocked! 😂 My amazing hubby said "she does all the renovating, I'm just here for the heavy lifting, or she'd do that herself too". I love the surprised older men! it's hysterical. My dad is a contractor and thought his daughters how to do things. And if we don't initially know, we figure it out and do it ourselves. ❤ Bless strong men backing thier strong ladies! 💪

[@jokeith1722]

💌

[@michlkwitz]

I loved Cathy's comments about how her two contractors both took a step back when the window guy made the insulting comment. You, know, like they we're getting out of the way of potential bloodshed. :)

[@ediethiel3026]

😂❤

[@nilakshiroy6]

Ha ha ha … like two little hyenas when the big cat comes snarrrrling. Though she didn’t . No, sir. She just left.

[@christinadipinto]

I can definitely relate to the hardware store dilemma.🤦🏻‍♀️ It happens to me all the time and my husband just doesn't understand why I'm annoyed when I get home... because it neverrr happens to him! 🙄 There is one positive story I'll share though: I was at a hardware store (wearing my work clothes), I had a tape measure out, and was measuring wood and comparing it against my drawings I had brought. An older guy in his '60s came up to me and asked, "Are you a contractor?" Excuse me, WHAT?! I was totally shocked and flattered. Apparently he needed some work done and he said I looked like I knew what I was doing! 🙌🏻 That happened almost 6 months ago now, and I still think about it every time I go to that store. Maybe one day we will all live to see the day where that happens regularly for us ladies out here gettin' it done!!👏🏻

[@suncatcherhouse3048]

I always go into the hardware store dressing in my cute girly clothes. I don’t personally like dressing down to make it easier for them to accept that I’m there. And when they do come up to me I school them. People need to learn not to judge a book by its cover. Also looking younger than I am has been a struggle for ever. I thought when I reached 30 it would change but it hasnt

[@bree9427]

Exactly this! I'm not as nice as they are. If someone treats me differently because I'm wearing a dress or cute outfit I will call them out on it and make them question their thought process.

[@rebekahmae31]

Yes. They need to conform to accommodate US, not the other way around. What a person wear should have 0 impact on how they're treated in a store, unless they're literally naked or something

[@gracebasque1471]

Ladies…..I thoroughly enjoyed this podcast! I am 82 years old and my husband was a general building contractor. We’ve been through sommelier situations as you. I hauled his gravel and in those days no women were doing that kind of work and they didn’t want to load my dump truck at first but finally they did work with me. I would also go to the pier to pickup freight that came in from the mainland and I couldn’t get help from the stevedores with their forklifts because I was a female. One of the guys said”there’s the forklift …load it”! So I said ok and I got out of my truck and climbed up into the forklift and started loading my truck and he finally stoped me and finished loading for me because civilians should not be loading their own freight on the pier and he would lose his job. So not much has changed through the years. And I had the cutest pair of overalls too!😂

[@MsEgwene]

Yes, exactly this! I am very nice about it, but definitely ready to make them think about their biases.

[@sharonmcbride2374]

Great episode. It makes me sad that this is still happening. Reminds me how you stood up for yourself when the vendor at the flea market kept talking to Romeo when you were attempting to buy the teak lounge chairs.

[@sarahgibson3529]

OMG I relate to your hardware store experiences so much! Men love to mansplain, especially in the lumber section. I actually had a really refreshing experience recently. I went in looking for a push stick for my table saw - safety first! I asked a male worker and he told me they didn’t carry them in store unfortunately. I thanked him and was ready to walk away. But he said “you know they’re really easy to make!” He helpfully explained the process and sent me on my way saying “you can do it”! He wasn’t condescending and he had confidence in me. That was the first time a man has assumed I knew how to use a power tool, vs. assuming I have no idea what I’m doing. It was really nice and refreshing to be taken seriously. I hope I run into him on my future hardware store trips- it’s also a second home for me!

[@CHomen100]

I bought my first set of power tools and rebuilt my side 6’ high fence with a 5’ wide gate. It took forever. I kept thinking of you and it is finally done. I added lighted caps to my posts. It is beautiful and I’m so proud! And IF it should fall, at least I know what to do to put it back up. 😅 Thank you for your inspiration!

[@juliackios]

If you’re feeling confrontational you can always answer something completely UNHINGED like “what are you building” “well, a guillotine… you see, I need to dismember a body and I think a guillotine would be a fun way to do it” The only thing greater than men’s love for underestimating us is their fear of crazy chicks 😊

[@Roroxane]

OMG this is genius, I'll definitely keep that in my back pocket 😂

[@QianaMDavis]

Haha good one. This is hilarious. Definitely a petty rebuttal I'd use LOL

[@hammerchickdesigns]

That's friggin hilarious!!! Love it!!

[@shontayad]

It's very interesting to hear these stories about men rushing to help, even if it can be insulting. I have literally never had a worker or customer try to help me when in a hardware store. They all kind of act like I'm not there, and I have to hunt someone down to help.

[@amara560]

Same for me. I wish pretty privelege/convential beauty was included in this conversation.

[@AlyssaMathews-ro6ez]

It probably also depends on the location/quality of the store… The hardware store I used to go to that was close to the city this sort if stuff to some degree would happen, but since I moved to a “small town” the workers themselves don’t have any clue or knowledge when I actually do want help and ask questions lol So they don’t give looks or bother me at all 😅

[@VanessaManley]

I bought my house in 2021 (I’m single) when I was calling people for plumbing work ALL of them asked if my husband would be home when they came to look at the shower. I told them I don’t have a husband and they immediately were flustered. One asked then asked if someone else would be there 🤦‍♀️ and I said “who would that be??” Sometimes I act like I didn’t hear them and make them repeat it and they will change it up real quick or I play dumb so they feel ashamed. Buying a house alone has been an eye opening experience to say the least. I work with tradesmen as little as possible now.

[@IMOO1896]

I can understand the plumber-repairman wanting another person in the vicinity. It’s for protection of you both.

[@MsEgwene]

​@@IMOO1896 How exactly? Do you think they ever ask men if their wife will be home too? Why not just ask "will at least two people be present?" ?

[@Roroxane]

OMG 😤 I'd be like honey, I'M the husband, do your thing and get off my back

[@gfgerl]

@@MsEgwene It is because a lone woman could accuse the man of assault. Very low chance of a lone man accusing the man of sexual assault. Come on.

[@MsEgwene]

@@gfgerl Oh, come on! This is getting ridiculous!

[@meganlaporta1420]

I do construction loans and have to communicate with the borrowers (usually husband and wife) that are building the home as well as the contractors and it is almost ALWAYS the woman/wife that is coordinating everything with me and with the contractor. Always.

[@PHcute]

And why is that? Because men are useless? Genuine question. Want to hear ideas WHY I AM doing everything in my marriage and my husband is only interested in when he can go to the gym or his weekend hike and literally not give a shit about anything else? Am I the only one?

[@amara560]

​@@PHcuteGenuine question. Have you asked your husband?

[@emmaallaert7014]

Hi MaCenna, I’m a 27 year old female civil engineer. My job is renovation coach, so I advise owners how to energetically renovate their house. I can really relate with what you said about dressing a certain way. I’m also very into fashion so I like to dress, you know, nicely and sometimes girly but in the beginning I dressed differently because I noticed people sometimes didn’t take me seriously. But I have been thinking a lot about this and I hate to dress ‘down’, so I told myself to just dress how I want and people just have to deal with it. In the beginning, when they see me they are sometimes sceptical but when they see that I actually know what I’m talking about, they really appreciate it. I love your videos and what you’re doing so much, keep doing what’s true to you! Lots of love, from Belgium btw 😊❤

[@QianaMDavis]

Yes. Have learned the hard way not to dim my shine. Also into fashion and I've made myself smaller out of fear and seeking acceptance. No more and you shouldn't do it anymore either. Be you and be fashionable while doing it

[@maryoconnor2228]

My friend who is a single parent with a mid twenties son, was setting up a stall at a market and brought her large mobile tool kit with her on the day. One of the other stallholders said "isn't your son very good to loan you his toolkit". She nearly exploded and advised him that her toolkit had been collected over 25 years by her and her son wouldn't know how to use 90% of the tools!

[@abeerali7834]

Been single as long as I can remember, and even when I was married, I’ve never depended on my husband for anything, not even money. When I used to get such treatment from men, I thought it was because I was young. I’m 56 now and men still didn’t change their attitudes with me. Been a builder/designer all my life. Men also get extremely furious and very offended when I throw great ideas or strategies to approach a problem, but when it’s a man’s idea, he gets an a pat on the back with smiles. 😮

[@maralavern]

1000%

[@robinwoods9961]

Men doesn't want women to put do them. It's an ego thing.

[@ritagraybill9414]

I taught wood shop in Texas and everyday one of my students would come to class and name a tool that their dad asked them to ask me what it was. It was quite hilarious and after I answered correctly they looked very sheepish. Loved teaching that class as the kids would grown when I said time to clean up. They loved the class even when a woman taught it. Their dads came to tell me they were impressed.

[@cindicarter483]

Walked into Home Depo recently, and wondered why no one was patronizing me (“Can I help ya, Little Lady?”) like they usually do. Got back home and discovered I had some paint splotches on my face as well as blue tape bits on my shirt where I “store” them while doing a final inspection on my drywall projects. The tape is already torn….ready to grab off my shirt and “mark” the spot needing repair. Now my Home Depot outfits always include bits of tape falling off my shirt and a sprinkle of face paint when I need to race through the store! Thanks for a GREAT podcast, Little Ladies! 😉😉😉😂

[@Roroxane]

How sad that we have to wear a disguise to be taken seriously. I doubt they dismiss men if they show in nice clothes

[@lizzyinthefens]

My partner and I (we're both female) used to own a café on a main street. We did all the DIY work ourselves, inside and out - so as you can imagine, whenever we did work on the outside of the building, there were a lot of people passing by and a lot of men desperate to comment on everything. The worst was when we got a ladder out - men were practically falling over themselves to tell us how to use it or make suggestions. My favourite though was one morning very early when I was using a cordless sander on some of the woodwork. A man was standing around clearly trying to think of something to say, like a compulsion. He obviously couldn't think of anything as he eventually just blurted out "you'll have to charge the battery on that thing once it's run out". Yes really. In the end I did just resort to ignoring everyone in order to get the work done..! Solidarity, ladies!!!! :'-D

[@Pumorastickt]

My partner and I are doing a lot of the construction on our own so it has not been so much of a problem. Yet, there are instances when older men (and also women) emphasize how great it is to have such a handy man at home and a woman for the decoration. We document our house renovation on KZbin and although I do a lot of construction work, it seems as if this gets overlooked by a certain demographic. In the real world, I love to shock men who visit us by lifting the heavy stuff - because I can - and see their "can I help you with thaaaa..." fade away in disbelief. So worth it every time XD The best thing we can do to change opinions is to show that we can do these things, no matter how young or girly we look. You are a great inspiration to me to push my skills even further. Thanks to you, I want to build my kitchen alone, too! It is nice to have a helping hand, but it is also nice to not need it to finish a task.

[@monteturpin1937]

I had a male customer at home depot who came down an aisle where there was me and 2 other women and he comes down and says "you women need to stay in the grocery store!" We three just stared with our mouths open!

[@Inquisaizn]

Love this episode! It's (not the right words but...) nice to hear the stories from both of you and getting to see that the world is changing, albeit slower than it should. Hopefully we don't have to prove ourselves at all and it becomes normal to speak to everyone the same. I've only done small projects and normally I avoid eye contact and look at what I need as if I'm in a bubble. For context, I'm small and in my 20s but look like I could fit into a middle school or high school. Once I was checking out at the hardware store and this older man was training a younger male employee on cash register. The older man was talkative to the younger employee and the couple in front of me. When it was my turn, (I always start every encounter kindly and leave it to the other person to determine my attitude later on) I greeted both employees and asked how they were doing. Was completely ignored. Older employee bagged my purchase and left it in the area where the bags were hanging and I had to walk around the plexiglass panel to get it. Before I even pick my bag up, talkative again with the couple behind me. So I couldn't tell if the older man was sexist or ageist or what but it made me so mad that I didn't even think to look at his name tag so I could complain if I wanted to. Pretty much blacked out until I got home.

[@pattipattisgardenvintage5552]

I worked at Home Depot for 10 years. I loved showing up the guys that didn't take me seriously.

[@bethjackson6358]

Hello ladies, I just have you tell you you two always make my day.. I bought 2 of your momma’s paintings, I can’t wait until they arrive. I Purchased “ Lavender Sky” and “Afternoon Slumber” can’t wait for the next podcast or flea market trip. You have such fun..you make me happy..

[@Snicklefritz00]

They aren’t hating on men you guys 🤦🏽‍♀️ they are addressing the disproportionate amount of hurdles many women who work in males dominated fields have to jump through to be addressed the same as a man would. MaCenna I do the exact same thing at the hardware store - I put my headphones in and get my stuff and get out haha but when I need help I will ask someone and there’s no issue in that! But for instance, like what MaCenna was saying about the plywood, if someone won’t help you because they are assuming you are under qualified because of how you look, that gets extremely frustrating! This is a shared experience between many people in hetero male dominated industries but of course there are amazing men like Macenna’s plumber who is an advocate for learning and knowledge no matter who you are! I loved this episode - I related to many of these stories and it’s ok if you didn’t relate to these stories but that doesn’t mean they were being hateful to all men!

[@HatefulPerfection]

It is man-hating and most of the comments are man-hating.

[@janetoneal1145]

I feel like some of it is, My hubby and I (38 years in construction) will be in a hardware store and he will see someone struggling and ask if they need help? we have all daughters, very capable, strong daughters, but if a man walked by, watching them struggle, They would be PO'd!! , it's very contradictory to ask for help. because you can't reach something, or do it yourself then get pissed because they asked you some questions, Most men do it out of good manners and politeness, this whole thing smacks a little of Entitlement and a poor attitude, I get social interactions can be awkward, but after watching this my husband said he doubts he will ever ask if someone needs help again!

[@Snicklefritz00]

If someone is struggling to reach something I think it makes complete sense to ask if someone needs a hand - I completely agree - however if someone were to purposefully not help me get a sheet of plywood (for example) because they thought I didn’t look qualified to know what I was shopping for because of how I looked or dressed, that’s when I would get annoyed. Having a chat about what project you’re working on vs having to convince someone of my abilities in order to purchase something from the hardware store is very different

[@emeraldsea28]

This episode was incredible. Every time I’m at the hardware store with my husband I feel like I have to overcompensate to be taken seriously. When they talk to my husband about the project I tell them, “he doesn’t know. Im doing the project.” And they’ve turned around and called me a “know it all”. I can’t win. Just treat me like an intelligent person. It’s so unwelcoming and I hate going in there. Now I can’t go with my husband either because I get another level of degradation.

[@Gracebyfaith7]

If only they realized how friendly and attractive it is to women to be respected and heard in any situation especially when we chose to do “man’s work” ourselves.

[@michelleodonnell7436]

Great content. I worked in the automotive industry in sales for 20 years. Understand from both sides.. co-workers and customers. Systemic sexism is slow to evolve. But it is evolving and it's thanks to people like you both pushing the historic gender boundaries and changing minds one tradesman at a time. 😁

[@nilakshiroy6]

From my 56th year to the present, I’m now 62, I’ve booked a flat, took a loan, decided on the instalments, took possession, gave it on rent, dealt with and met the renting agency and the renters, now gave it over to contractors, negotiated with them and am actually in my way to finalise decor and furnishings and ALL documents are in my name and I AM the first point of contact and each time they would turn around for “Sir” to emerge. As an Indian woman, that too only a professor of English, meaning not with much of technical or practical knowledge, I have let myself learn things on the way and be spoken to in the way I deserve. Feels great. Your responses and tactics are wonderful too, really difficult wherever you are to step into a man’s world.

[@savannahhutcheson8909]

Your mom on the ear phones “MaCenna Lee!” 😂 I feel ALL OF THIS! My mom was an electrician and her father owned a commercial contractor business so she knows her stuff and it’s EVERY TIME we go into hardware stores, talk to contractors, etc! Thank you for this video!

[@kittensaremyjam362]

ooooo, these stories got me riled up! I related so hard to being underestimated, talked down to, and having to stand up for yourself. I've spent years of my life pursuing woodworking and metalworking, doing DIY projects around the house, and I work in a completely unrelated male-dominated field. These stories are a nearly every day occurrence for me. It was so nice to hear both your experiences and feel like I'm not alone. As an aside, I wear whatever I want to the hardware store, and though I tend to get a lot of looks, I get very few questions anymore. I've perfected my RBF and that works wonders. 😂

[@kt_rvs2731]

MaCenna I need to tell you that it's because of watching you since even before the cottage, that I have even more confidence to do projects, learn work like this and power tools, etc. My Dad raised me and my sisters to be strong and independent, but seeing you do all you've done was like "hell yeah, MaCenna said I can do this!". I've had many similar examples of being underestimated either at the hardware store, getting work done on my car, when it comes to finances; basically anything that is considered male-dominant or a decision needs to made. I've had men try and talk to my husband about our finances and he's like Romeo, "ugh no you gotta talk to my wife". Haha. I've thankfully had mostly good experiences at the hardware store, no back-handed questions about what I'm doing and answering my questions as an equal versus dumbing it down. I was an art major so I spent my fair share of time at the hardware store getting materials for their unintended purpose, but the store near my college, staff rarely asked if I needed help because they knew most of us. lol

[@xocaityperry]

I have had so many instances where I’m not taken seriously at a hardware store and being mansplained things that I already know about. And my husband is the same way, he doesn’t even pretend to know what someone (or even me) is talking about when it comes to that kind of stuff. He has even been attacked on my TikTok account for not doing everything in a DIY for me and instead me being the main person doing the stuff. I am so happy to see more women doing DIY work or being the main point of contact for contracted jobs.

[@heidigresh2743]

I have had contractors that have had experiences with women who constantly change their mind mid project. I am sure that can be difficult. However, I am usually very prepared and have thought about what I want carefully. I think that contractors appreciate someone who knows exactly what she wants and doesn’t change her opinion daily.

[@carolbrizendine8777]

I can totally relate to your stories about the hardware store. I do all the home improvement things around my house. NOT my husband. I ran to the hardware store and had to get something from the bulk fastener section. The bins weren’t clearly labeled as to what product number I should write on the bag. So I took my best guess and went to the check out. I set down my items and said to the cashier “I hope I did this right” and SHE said “oh if it’s not right make him come back and get it himself next time”. 😮 I was just stunned! Gender bias is real y’all! Thank you for the tips you gave to help make this easier. I’m definitely going to give it a try. Love your channels!

[@sarahhoffman8500]

I learned to do most stuff myself because I got so tired of this crap. I build my own stuff and repair my own house. Knowing the right way to do a job has made me realize how many times contractors will try to skip steps when they think I don’t know any better. The rapid backpedaling when I ask why they don’t intend to do X before Z gives me life.

[@LindaKayHolevas]

I love how MaCenna & Cathy are always dressed similarly. I wonder if they plan their outfits to coordinate one another, or if it just happens naturally. I used to take my mom to lunch once a week when she got older & couldn’t drive anymore. She had dementia, so she wouldn’t remember a conversation even if we had it, however, I would show up & we would just start giggling. We were almost 95% of the time wearing a very similar outfit, just in different decade of style. We were just that untuned with one another. 😊

[@denises9426]

Hearing your Mom talk about the men that would speak to her about the job, but then spoke to her husband regarding the money - I was infuriated for her! Young women like you are changing this attitude I hope! 🙏🏻🤞🏻🍀🥰❤️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

[@philipparushworth2193]

You are empowering, I am DIY savvy, but was worried about electrics, which I have now conquered and wondered why I was so scared. When my daughter recently bought her new flat ( English for apartment), I had no hesitation about tackling her leaking basin. Good work my lovely, we ladies are more than capable.

[@Bill480513]

I do all my decorating at my home and I love it when I have an idea and get "poo poo-ed" by men, then I do it anyway, and get rave reviews from all my friends. I love to see the look of the male faces when that happens. They finally realized that I know what I'm doing. My husband is a great supporter and I love that!!

[@Malindraelf]

Love the podcast. It warm my heart to see the relationship you and your mother have. i didn't have one with my mother, but made sure i have one with my daughter. Love you both. Your videos are the highlights of my day. Have a great summer! Love from Norway.

[@M.Jsmile]

I laughed out loud ! Your mom in such a sweet voice " they live for people like you". OMG ! gangster.

[@Everydaylaurafaye]

I loved these tips!! Like the headphones and the lowering of the voice !!!

[@cherisserich4912]

Growing up with a house with a full wood working shop in the garage that all belonged to my mom really has paid off in my confidence at the hardware store. Even in a dress with children in tow, no one will talk down to me. My mom was picking up some wood for a project and a worker was going to help her load it into our minivan, and he remarked that it wasn't going to fit. My mom knew it would, and said, "If I wanted a man to tell me this wasn't going to fit, I would have brought my husband." I got to use that line later when I was loading up materials to redo a shower in my own minivan with 2 babies. Another time I was building a trailer in the parking lot, and I needed help to flip it over, and I was really grateful to 2 men who were just walking into the store that were willing to help me. There really are some great people out there, and some annoying ones too. That guy with the wood, that has definitely happened to me. Thanks for sharing your journey. I love watching it!

[@titusandjackie4167]

I am in the same situation now myself. I had one instance with my builder early on but I put him straight and the relationship has been great since. Thanks for the inspiration I am about to try and build my own cabinets because of you!! 😊

[@jacquelyn_holland]

I worked in a small town hardware store at the contractors desk for a few years and would have contractors wait for one of the men to be free instead of letting me help them. Even if they had to wait an extra 30 mins, even if the man they were waiting for was a new employee and didn't know how to do things, even if the "man" was a teenage boy stocking shelves. It was frustrating but then I realized they are just making their own life harder and my life easier because I didn't have to deal with them haha

[@DIYCSI]

I’ve been rewatching all your videos and following the podcast as I’m moving into my first apartment alone and doing little diy’s- and can i just say how inspiring your growth and attitude have been. My fiancé doesn’t live with me rn bc he’s finishing school in another part of TX, but everytime we comes down for a weekend he comments on what i’ve done around the place in awe bc he knows he cant hang a shelf let alone build a fireplace mantle from scratch. powerful women in male industries for the win 🎉

[@DIYCSI]

also on the hardware store horror story front- i tend to go in my work uniform to give people the dont f-with me vibe. nobody wants to approach a ‘Crime Scene Investigator’ lookin at power saws

[@1poundatatime]

So I restored an 1892 Victorian home in Denver in 1991. And it was my project and I went to Sears to get a drill that fit my hand and the sales person kept speaking to my husband. And I finally had to say that I am your customer, you need to deal with me. I have been in construction for 30 years and it is a good ole boy network. But organizations like NAWIC has helped so much. It was established in Texas. I have watched every single thing you have done and you inspire me!

[@MissRegi1980]

I love watching your videos especially when you have these conversations with your mom ,❤I love her personality. I have always had many of similar situation happened to me in home depot and Lowe's when I go to buy things I need for all my Diy I make for my channel also. My husband and I have a Trucking business and to this day all of our worker address my husband instead of me and our contractors always ask for him and dismiss me and that makes me so upset . Men just need to understand we are the brains before muscle. thank you for showing that women are able to make things happen. 😁

[@elodiek9652]

God, I feel like you’re my twin flame! Had a contractor come out the other day for an estimate to move a septic tank for a build site. He spent 30 minutes talking down to me trying to convince me I was wrong and just need to build somewhere else…. Like dude, I want to pay money to do something, just tell me what it costs 😂

[@ritagraybill9414]

This has happened to me everywhere in the world I have lived. Actually it works both ways in that when men realize I am the one who knows what needs to be done they are very helpful. My husband had many laughs when he told tradesmen that he had no idea but his wife did.

[@MoMoney0617]

I get the opposite at the hardware story. I can never find anyone willing to stop and help.

[@ukbarber]

This was the best one yet. Brilliant Ladies 😂❤.

[@ramonamartinez735]

Hi MaCenna. I was just watching your podcast with your mom.I was looking at your hearth and I thought it would look great if you could paint them like your brick in the LA home. The color of the brick matches the screen saver above the mantel. I love the fact you listen to our ideas. Makes us feel like we are friends talking over our ideas. Love watching your journey ❤️

[@coralwebb4245]

So funny watching the both of you get frustrated when recalling past annoyances is hilarious 😆. Love the banter and matching outfits as well 😅🐨

[@MissAgloailatan]

I cannot express how much I relate to your stories. Running a custom new-build house project, I've experienced all sorts of attitudes from male contractors ranging from treating me as if I was intelectually handicapped to completely disregarding my instructions to blackmail ("I can do it the way you want me to but I'm pretty sure it'll fall apart in a couple of months" was the exact phrase I heard when I told my contractor I've alrady arranged for materials to be delivered from a vendor that didn't pay him any interest rate for end-customer purchase) to using my ex-husbands' total lack of knowledge to go up on the price for some totally made-up reason (by the way, building your own house is identified as one of the mai reasons for divorce where I live) to refusal to sell me material because "it was expensive". I've had a pretty goood relationships with vendors and sales assistants in my area though. I'm on first name terms with some of them and I tend to get pretty good deals as a regular customer. But there was this one particularly funny situation last year, when I and my dad volunteered to help renovate a former office space to turn it into an appartment for Ukrainian refugees. As there were a lot of people that could clean the rooms, carry furniture and supplies, I and my dad assigned ourselves to building a proper bathroom in what had been a utility room before. Some walls needed patching with drywall, some needed to be plastered - things like that. My dad was watching men's reactions to me cutting some aliminum profiles with sheet metal shears and plastering the walls. Some of the male volunteers were shocked, some were awed, but there wasn't a single neutral reaction! Another day my dad was mixing some mortar with a drill-mounted mixer and he stopped to grab something from another room, so I took the mixer over and continued. This random guy was passing by and saw me and he literally came in that bathroom, took the drill mixer out of my hands and made me move away from that bucket of mortar. It must have been like this final straw on the camel's back for that guy to see me with that big power tool. He didn't even say a word, he just took it from me and turned back on me. But by the end of that project a lot of male volunteers were approaching me as if I was the foreman when they needed a decision to be made on what materials to use, how to install things and such.

[@shelleymolinaro5866]

Thank You MaCenna for the discussion topic with your mom... We need to talk to eachother about this more often.

[@michellespringett]

I would love to listen to a podcast with you and Romeo! It would be so interesting to hear more about his business!

[@kursteekreme659]

I loved the section about the hardware store because I experience that as a woman all the time! I will never forget a time I went into the hardware store and got asked if I needed help or what was I working on in every aisle, INCLUDING a guy literally stopping what he was doing up a lift and coming down to explicitly ask me if I needed help. I couldn't help but laugh at the absurdity.

[@phoebedoeseverything]

Funny story: once when I was looking at different types of plaster at the hardware store, a man trying to help me, he asked what job I needed the plaster for I said “I am making melted disco balls” He was confused and speechless, I think also a little disappointed that he wasn’t able to be a hero and help me 🤣

[@susanlee101]

This episode made me want to become a female contractor… such a good episode!

[@Apie310]

Can't help but think about your interaction with the pool lounger guy at the flea market. Sometimes you just need to show them who's boss ;)

[@phylliscalkins1607]

I love what you do with your houses!! I am so inspired. I used to do a lot of those things when I was in my 20's and 30's but not to the extent that you do. Bravo to you!! Unfortunately, when I did need help at the home improvement stores I rarely saw anyone around who could help me with my questions. I also liked to sew and do little DIY's. When I would be at the craft stores with fabric or other items I was buying, people would often ask what I was making. This may be different from what you're talking about with being asked what you were doing, but I found people to be curious and interested in ideas from each other who were getting supplies for projects. I too often look at people getting things and think, wow, I wonder what they are making? Seems people who make things like to know what other people who make/build things are doing for their projects.

[@YayaBolender]

I had one episode when my contractor was late to finish the works in my house, and my son, still a teenager then, and I decided to paint the living room and my bedroom. Nothing complicated. The contractor started laughing by seeing me painting the ceiling. I asked him what was so funny. He answered that “I shouldn’t do that”, he would do it. I told him: why shouldn’t I do that? It was my job in Paris, I was painting murals, that is easy compared to what I was doing in Paris. I will always remember his face when I said that. But the worst episode that I lived, it was not exactly about me, it was at Home Depot. At the Home Depot where I go, the salespersons know absolutely nothing. There was this old lady searching for nails without heads. She asked that salesman who literally laughed at her and said: nails always have heads! I had to intervene and I said to the guy: no, nails without heads exist, and I showed where they were to this old lady. The salesman looked really stupid: two women who knew better than him. When someone asks for my husband to take any decision, I hung up or dismiss the person. I’m divorced but even if my ex-husband had been here with me, he would have known much less than me, except maybe in electricity, he was better than me at anything electrical. Except for mounting lamps, I was the one mounting lamps, from scratch sometimes. It is not difficult.

[@margiebramer2384]

To borrow a line from Roadhouse...be nice until it's time not to be nice. I have been so frustrated with contractors that I have learned to do so much myself. Seeing women like you and your mom handling situations and doing it yourself has really pushed me to do even more!!!

[@Roroxane]

OMG the hardware store 😤 Honestly I would love to just browse the aisles and read the labels and learn about the things, what they do, what they're used for ... It should feel like a candy store. But instead I always feel so self concious, like I'm being wathched and have to project confidence at all times. It's so frustrating

[@IceQueen1234]

When I was 19....one of my first jobs was working for a Building Supply company....I worked with contractors for the most part....it took me quite some time and me learning as much as possible as quickly as I could in order to earn the respect of grizzled old contractors....lol...it's most definitely a male dominated world~!!

[@IceQueen1234]

I will add that there was one female contractor... She encouraged me a lot...!!

[@jbknapp3680]

Great information as I go forward in having and doing projects in my home. thank you so much. I wish I had seen this yesterday as I was meeting with a contractor. "Let them talk"...great way to go forward

[@chafrajayfra32]

I love how Kinsley uses your podcast time to nap. So cute 🥰.

[@kjgilbert8]

Love this episode! So crazy how you recorded this episode, then had an experience like this when buying the pool lounge chairs in LA.

[@cattyandfriends]

Great podcast Macenna! Your videos are always very informative 😊

[@jessicameyers1293]

Your videos are very inspiring. Can you make a video on your vlog channel on the tools you use and are important to have when owning a home? All that you do is helpful!

[@jtcapital7994]

I absolutely love this show!!!! I just stumbled on this channel today. And it's so good to know that I am not by myself when it comes to construction. My friends can not relate to me when it comes to building? I have had several issues with subs and had to fire some. I found our land, evaluated it, designed our entire floorplan ect... in the construction industry They either think you don't know or are offended because you know their jobs.

[@juliaukaszewicz8224]

I know exactly what you're talking about! I'm working in builder's supply store at the plumbers section and I get disrespected by men almost everyday. So much of them think they know better then me when I'm working there over a year and they know nothing about the department. So much of them wanted to wait for my male colleague until he finishes helping other costumer meanwhile I'm offering my help to them. But often it happens that my colleague asks me for help with their problem. Then the face of the customer is the reward for me and when they came back, they came back straight to me 😅 Sorry for my English and greetings from Poland. Love watching your videos and listing to your podcast 🫶🏼

[@colleenmasse9368]

You're helping pave the road for us women..learning so much from you. Love your content ❤

[@MrTiny-mb4qz]

Not to diminish your experience but, as a male presenting person, I would give anything to have someone at a hardware/home improvement store help me!! I’ve been to every home improvement store in Orange & Los Angeles Counties and can rarely get someone to assist me. When I do find someone, they usually take for granted that I should know what I’m doing (I don’t) or they’re just completely misinformed.

[@patwilkinson2182]

Always love your podcasts

[@megangreen4389]

Loved this topic! At my local big box store, it’s hard to get help. I can never get wood cut. Where do you plug in to cut your wood in the parking lot??? Love this idea!!!

[@pmartin4143]

I love this episode so much! I’ve been using the earphone trick for years.

[@wingingitsemiretiredlife2981]

As a woman I can totally relate. In my experience it's been with auto repairs. I find that I need to troubleshoot the problem and KNOW exactly what the issue is before I bring the car in or I will get taken advantage of.

[@vsirimar]

I’m in the progress of deciding whether I want to buy a home and renovate or build a home from scratch. Could your mom talk about the process of building a home. I need all the details lol. Love you guys. Keep the podcast coming!! ✨❤️

[@kristenschwartzman3121]

Loved this so much!! You and your mom inspire me so much in different ways. ❤ I worked in the commercial and residential glass industry for 18 years. The men would come into our showroom and immediately ask for “one of the guys “. So annoying. I loved to mess with them if I could. One time a customer came in and asked for one of the guys so I went and got our knew hire with NO knowledge of our industry and went back to my office. Lol. My office had big glass windows of the show room. I got to watch the whole thing. The poor employee had to comeback 4 times and ask questions. I just kept answering and smiling at the customer through the glass. I eventually went out and took care of the customer but it was so enjoyable.

[@amara560]

This was a very interesting discussion! Love that you did this with your mom. I had hoped you would take pretty privilege/conventional beauty into account with all this, but maybe you can come back to that in a future podcast episode. I would love that.

[@estelsaradop492]

I have SUCH GREAT RESPECT FOR YOU!! It's gotten to the point where I wonder, is there anything you can't do?

[@joyremillard8333]

You have inspired me, redoing my little kitchen has 3 different cabinets doors doing the top one color and bottoms to give the illusion. They’re all the same and it’s a basement area and the ceiling is only 7 feet maybe. So painted the bottom all a sage green shade and the top a warm white. Doing faux beadboard , wallpaper and painting it white doing faux wainscot in the rest and my dinning room. Doing it on a budget but loving the work and results. Your determination is contagious. Just like your laugh a wonderful day and thank you thank you to your Mom !!❤

[@Fireonmyaltsrneverburnout]

Mama is a class act. 😊 love her.

[@robinwoods9961]

Loved the podcast because this is happened to me so many times, I've even got so mad I just walked out and went somewhere else. Thank you for this podcast.

[@colinmcknight9605]

The same issue happens in car sales too. A friend of mine is a single mom, and she asked me to come with her when she went shopping for a new car. My mere presence made the salesman treat her as a serious customer. I didn't believe it was a real concern until I saw them dismiss her as soon as we got to the showroom. They'd ask me a question about what specs I was looking for. I just pointed to her and said they were asking the wrong person. They'd get a confused look, but then start dealing with her. If they came back to ask me another question, we left the dealership. Their loss.

[@Missdanelle]

Good listen

[@adventuresofmouse3394]

I'd give my pinky toe to sit and chat with you two ladies about this! I'm in the middle of a complete gut job, basically building a new house with a pool etc etc and boy oh boy is it tough communicating with the fellas! Just today alone the things that happened! I was fuming and teared up all at once! 😡🥺 It's so much work trying to maintain your position without being labeled itchy with a b! It's exhausting! Anyway, thank you both so much for sharing your experiences! ❤ And let me know if you ever need more stories....I'm your girl! ☕😄❤️

[@CatherineHaack]

Such a great episode! A sub-contractor once asked me when I answered the door, “Is your mom or dad home?” Lol. Listen man, I own this house.

[@Pistachiox33]

Great episode! Love when Kathy comes on! 😊

[@grettagiesbrecht5772]

I send my husband in even when I know more about something because I can’t stand dealing with the BS. He’s in and out quicker than I’d be. I’ve been literally ignored after making eye contact with a sales associate. I can’t hold in my anger 😂.

[@amandam9879]

So frustrating that this kind of thing happens in any male dominated industry. I’m a female physician and this same sort of thing happens all the time to me (more so with patients and families than with coworkers) but it’s frustrating to always go into your daily “workplace” so to speak with the knowledge that you have to start by proving yourself over and over again. But hopefully if we all do this enough, it will eventually change

[@jaclynbaerart]

So excited to listen to this today! I'm packing for a month long trip so this will be perfect to listen to as I pack! Eek!

[@groundingmycrown8291]

Happy travels!

[@ells426]

I got my dad a new table saw for Father’s Day and there were several people who commented on how impressed they were that I 1. knew the saw I wanted 2. could get the saw in the cart by myself. It’s often not such a positive reaction so I’m glad I had that this time around ❤

[@amara560]

I'm glad it was a positive experience for you. Sounds kinda patronizing to me hearing you tell this.

[@darlaburnett8666]

I think you ladies bring up really good valid points that again I hope our male industry contractors get an opportunity to listen to this, and take heed! I don’t think that every female on a job wants to be the foreman of her own job, but I also feel like if you are dealing with that female from the get go They’re not only the contractor, the foreman of that particular project, and all of his subcontractors “workers” should know that when that female is on the job or is present or ask you to do something she is the first foreman in line especially women like your mother and yourself that have designed these homes that have done everything every detail you as the mail worker coming in to do the project for completion don’t get to change her design and I really think that’s where this particular industry struggles. The most is in their mind. They are the Alpha mayor you don’t get to tell me what I am and what I am not going to do you just get to get your checkbook out little lady and wrap the check.

[@jeanettewhite2144]

Another great podcast. Thanks for sharing❤❤❤

[@kellyharvey8114]

Hello Ladies, love this episode!☺ I too have gone through the same thing every time I go into the hardware store here. As I do a lot of my own DIY projects. Hate when they ignore me and walk right by me without asking me if I need help seeing I am too short get something.

[@jessbahr9507]

When I was in college I was a manager at a hardware store. I got the position because I was so knowledgeable about tools and lawn equipment. I worked there for 5 years. The amount of times I would ask a man if he needed help and he would reply with “can you get a male associate, sweetheart. I’m working on a big project” still enrages me. The only satisfaction I would get is a lot of the times I would send one of my male associates over KNOWING he would probably have to come bring me back to answer that customers questions. I had a sassy smirk and probably more attitude than was professional, but putting them in their place as a 5 foot tall feminine blond girl really made my day. Now I work in tech and I still get get that at times, but it’s not nearly as bad!