50+ Years of Undiagnosed ADHD - Mistakes + Lessons Learned (the hard way)

[@lagomorphia9]

Appreciate what you said about not having kids. I was undiagnosed til 50 and raising kids was so incredibly hard with all my personal chaos and emotional dysregulation. Rather than enjoy it, I cried every day in the early years because ADHD also comes with depression for me. Then the insane amount of time management required for older kids and teens had me at the end of my rope daily. I was responsible but missed out the joy part due to my ADHD, because I didnt know I had it I was always falling behind on normal. As soon as I was diagnosed, a big part of my growth was accepting who I was, as is.

[@CarenMagill]

I have a lot of compassion for you. This is why I chose not to take the parental path. it's not easy.

[@Lynee5290]

This is me, 3 children by the age of 26, the struggle was horrible with a lot of crying! I loved them all and they’re adults now but there is so much I can’t even remember, I was on autopilot. Depression, anxiety and a (ex) husband who basically told me to get on with it was my existence. At 67 I’m now just coming to terms with the fact that I have ADHD and explains so much about my life from early childhood.

[@wendyhannan2454]

I was diagnosed at 75 almost 2 years ago. It’s a relief to know what I’ve been dealing with, and what’s been holding me back. We all wish we had of known as kids, I’m happy for the kids today, as the parents and teachers can pick it up early. I believe exercise is so important. I’m now walking every day, and go to exercise classes once a week. Thanks you, I love your videos.

[@KJ-lb4tj]

The good news is everyone can learn to emotionally regulate. You can also see where your chaotic lifestyle came from and make adjustments there. Depression also is not simply a biological factor and can be treated. So all of your symptoms can be worked on. Great news!

[@KJ-lb4tj]

You might find it helpful to not call it 'my ADHD'. It isn't who you are, it is a list of symptoms or challenges you face.

[@Minris1]

I was diagnosed at 51 (last year). Everytime I read or listen to adhd stories I’m blown away at how I survived this long. And how different things would have been if id understood as a young adult.

[@karmacat68]

Yep....I can so relate...me too

[@WellBeingLifeStyle101]

I have been diagnosed just recently at the age of 54 years old. I feel the same way but now you know about it is an opportunity to make your life better than ever. I wish you all the best.

[@jenA9026]

Yep. 57 here. Just diagnosed. Failure to reach potential. Burnout every 3 years.

[@clairebond6958]

Only learned at age 56 that I am inattentive add. Wish it was taken seriously when I was young. School was tough 😅learning to love myself for what am I . Proud of how hard I try to help myself daily. My family just think I do not try enough 😢

[@tknows470]

@@WellBeingLifeStyle101I love the positive energy! ❤

[@tracybrown9752]

As a teacher I have found that ADHD can be an amazing strength. A large majority of the students I have had that were diagnosed with ADHD ended up in the gifted program in our district.

[@eobrien1]

Same. I feel like having it is what makes me a good teacher. I am able to make things clear and concise and easy to understand, cutting out the noise of a confusing topic.

[@tigrenoire139]

Yes, there's a term for that--imagine that. 😊 It's called being "twice exceptional".

[@alisonbamford6723]

Wish I’d had that at school over half a century ago. I was so good at English, but abysmal at math. I’d lost quite a bit of the grounding of it due to childhood illness & didn’t start to ‘get’ it until about 6 months prior to leaving. I’m very much a visual learner, so had Math been taught to me in a visual way, I might have ‘got’ it a lot earlier. Back then you were graded according to your overall ability, so my poor Math pulled me down to the third stream. Only the top 2 got to take O level English (as it was back then in the U.K.). I did CSE (basic Certificate of Secondary Education) English exam. I had to do 25 essays for the exam. Because of my procrastination & doing better under pressure, I did the last 15 of them the night before the exam & still got grade 1! I was such an avid reader - Mum used to get me 16 books every week from the Mobile Library - that English was my ‘thing’, & I know I could have done the O Level exam had my teacher pressed for it for me. But hey Ho. Ce La vie. I left school the minute I could, without a backwards glance. My brain is still an incessant information gatherer, sorter, analyst, processor. I realised my son had ADD when he was about 16 - and went around parents evening slapping a book on it down in front of every teacher. Most had complained about his dreaminess, but none had ever thought to figure out why. It was still newly discovered back then. I’ve often wondered about myself, but only recently have I discovered about the brain hyperactivity aspect - which my son also has. Physically, I’m a slug. Have had very low energy for half a Century but my brain never shuts up! Now I’m investigating & seeing other people’s experiences, so much is finally falling into place…….

[@WendyHannan-pt7ez]

Wow thanks for sharing that, there’s many successful people who have ADHD.

[@sandrainontario6710]

Just recently I am learning that I may have ADHD at the age of 74. I was very moved by you saying that you knew at a very early age that you did not want children as I did the same thing and people look at me very questioningly when I tell them that I never had children by choice. I also believe it's one of the best decisions I ever made.

[@KellenAdair]

The same at, 71.

[@janelmiller5935]

53 with no kids. always knew I didn't want kids. people seem to think I lazy when I say I can barely care for myself day to day. I 100% believe being childfree is the best choice for me. I am proud of myself for not having children and making them live with and through my mental illness.

[@johnscully2637]

Diagnosed at 61. I've always felt like I was different but a mental disorder. Wow. 😊

[@wendyhannan2454]

75, here, I wouldn’t be without my kids, best thing I ever did. It’s hard but doable,it’s just more of a challenge. I very much respect people who know they don’t want children.

[@le_th_]

I'm 56 and even my generation STILL looks at me when I say that I knew, at age 10, I didn't want to have children...and then stuck to that. Today, I absolutely adore little ones, but I don't know want my own. I would even love being a nanny, but that is vastly different from being responsible for the care, feeding, and development of a tiny human being 24/7/365 for 20+ years. Then there are the ASSumptions people make about you...and the hushed whispers by people who think you're "infertile". Oh, I could go on...and this comes from people who are younger than me. Seriously. Oh, and this is in highly educated NorCal, in the SF Bay Area, too, not in the ultra-conservative, uneducated, pump-out-the-babies-for-Jesus or a highly-Catholic area of the Midwest. I also believe that...for the "child" I might have had, this was the best decision I could've made because every single child deserves the best parent they can have so they have the best chance at a happy, fulfilling life. The secondary gain is that it also was a good decision for me.

[@kathyblas8282]

Thank you! I'm in my 40s and it's only been this past week that I truly realized I may have ADHD. It explains so much.

[@TheAkasha2012]

47. This all sounds very familiar

[@krama017]

"a million ideas a day and wants to do all the things" 100%

[@Trissa.33]

omg totally me too

[@Sandi-zh2wx]

Me too!! I'll tell my trauma therapist all these great ideas I have, go back the nxt week and she asks me about them. I think she's finally caught on (I have great ideas, that's as far as I get 🫤)

[@Nydebbie]

Yes me except at age 62 my brain drains me into extreme fatigue! It’s been happening since my brain got damaged (mild tbi in car accident) in 2018 😞😢😵‍💫🥱

[@Nydebbie]

FYI just got dx this week 🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️

[@spiralsun1]

Ya 😂!!! ❤

[@cw8543]

This video helped me ACCEPT that my ADHD teen MEANS it when she says she doesn’t want kids. This helped me decide to an official diagnosis for myself. I’m a people manager and the teams often report it hard to work with me because it feels chaotic and it’s hard to know what is important.

[@CarenMagill]

I'm so glad it was helpful for you and your teen!

[@TheKyoung213]

I have pretty severe ADHD and had two children - homeschooled those kids very sloppily (in my opinion) and my son is a successful engineer who has done work for NASA and my daughter has also done really incredible things. Neither child had ADHD in any manner. I was a super fun and very loving mom and that is what made all the difference between me and other mothers - my instincts were always on point too. If your child has fear about having children, please read this to her. If it’s a person choice she has made, that is different. ❤️

[@Julia.Mandelbrot]

Can u find another kind of job? That can't be fun.

[@isleofahh]

Not every female wants kids. And teenagers know what they want. 43 and happily childfree since I knew at 14 thanks.

[@cw8543]

@@Julia.Mandelbrot I have a new job and an AWESOME Executive Admin who compensates for my work deficits.. she helps me get focused and

[@kcneese1]

Newly diagnosed at 52. Just wanted to say that having kids while stressful grounded me in a way that nothing else did before or has since! They keep you very much in the present moment and in your body at least mine did for me in my life. I know everyone is different. Just wanted to throw that out there Especially to anyone thinking about having kids or not having kids because of this diagnosis. There's nothing more meaningful in my life! They ground me, they inspire me to cope with the world in creative ways. I'm sure there are other motivations but for me they have been the most precious gift.

[@leialoha70]

This is my experience, too. Transitioning to kids moving out is very difficult for me and my adhd is more challenging now

[@sheilabalnis372]

Hi there - at 54 im just now realizing all the signs of ADHD. Can I ask how you went about getting diagnosed as an adult? Regular physician, or ? Thanks!

[@kcneese1]

@@sheilabalnis372 i'm a lawyer and research the crap out of everything always and so I just knew that I had it and knew I wanted to try medication for many reasons. I went to my direct primary care provider. She's a physicians assistant and gave me two perfunctory oral tests but I also explained to her in detail why I appeared to fit the profile for middle-aged women with ADHD and how the diagnosis also made lots of sense of many of my experiences in childhood and teenage years.

[@kcneese1]

@@leialoha70 oh my gosh I can totally relate to that! Two of my 3 are practically out of the house and one more will be in the next couple years. We've been discussing college. Of course I am hyper focused on this project for now but when he leaves…?

[@Yosetime]

I'd have to agree. I ended up getting a divorce when my kids were 3 and 2 years old. I didn't know I had ADHD, but I was already 33 and had been waiting for these kids for years! So I threw myself into being the best single parent I could be and that structure and drive, as I now know, is what kept me going, and what also kept me from realising I had ADHD. It wasn't until the kids grew up and were out of the house that the cards came crashing down. Totally unexpected result. I wonder what would have happened to me if I had not been a single parent on a mission? Would I have gone off the rails with undiagnosed ADHD? I'm so glad I didn't because at least I got to raise my kids pretty well. But I've been a mess these last few years before my diagnosis. Thank goodness!

[@AnEchoAway]

I feel like too many parents in this world shouldn't have been parents. Making that decision is fantastic and gives more than just freedom.

[@sleekitwan]

Yes, and the rotten ones seem to want to do it over and over…!

[@cindyhoomalu1566]

@@sleekitwando they want to? Or is it just their lack of taking measures to prevent it due to ADHD? 😅

[@ckransomed]

@@AnEchoAway I think the one who puts together that human in the womb, and gives BREATH (no scientists will ever hack this) to the foetus uploads the software/ manual to bring up the human. But people sometimes make poor choices in life or life turns out in certain ways that they aren't the best parent to their children.

[@margretmcdermott2005]

@@cindyhoomalu1566 fair point

[@markmacfarlane3169]

I made that decision at a young age regarding kids too and because I have enough parenting myself.

[@PeppermintPatties]

I'm late-diagnosed autistic, menopausal, and suspect I'm also ADHD. Everything you said applies to me! It's all fabulous advice. Well done on working on your wellbeing. 🏆 One extra thing that helps: discover your spiritual life. When there's nothing left in the tank, it will centre and ground you, and help you to keep going. 🙏 🥰

[@danafarmer5782]

So true 😊

[@jenniferkogure3370]

My grounding technique might seem strange, but it's shoveling snow in the winter, and any type of yard work for the rest of the year. I find it very relaxing, and it allows me to be in the moment.

[@danajohnson7551]

Me too!!

[@nancyrampmeyer8492]

Same here. I live in the woods and leaves are falling. I pushed them back to the property line twice this week. Most would wait for the leaves to finish falling! LOL! It puts a smile on my face when the wind blows hard, I'll take the snow shovel, throw leaves in the air and watch the wind do the work. TMI, sorry!!😂

[@jenniferkogure3370]

@@nancyrampmeyer8492 I love it! 💕

[@SouthCountyGal]

Same! Nature is supposed to be chaotic, and I can impose a small amount of order on it while taking care of my energy needs -- and while my small changes to my environnement bring me pleasure, the remaining chaos is still beautiful. Indoors, it's all chaos I created and it just inspires guilt.

[@jenniferkogure3370]

@@SouthCountyGal I love the way you described it thank you for sharing ❤️

[@ioio7470]

11:40 only way adhder can thrive in Neurotypical world 14:10 exercise is next best thing to adhd medication

[@Vapourwear]

Thirty seven years I thought there was something seriously wrong with me. Turns out I was coping (as the “kids”used to say) like a boss and basically Superman compared to the “normal” folks abusing adderall and still getting 2.8 GPA’s. Point is, you’re probably doing better than you think, and a lot of your trouble is the massive amounts of negative reinforcement you receive from “normal” people, who are actually being huge dicks to YOU when they do that, and you get to cope even more.

[@katherinelugo2819]

Thank you for saying this. I've been put down by people with the "best of intentions" and it really helps to know there's nothing wrong with me and there ARE things I can do to take control of my mind and life.

[@carriegrant6164]

Yes!!! I’m just finding out I’m ADHD, and everyone has always shamed me for having character flaws and not being perfect. I feel seen for the first time in my 44 years of life 🙈😭

[@Sincerely_SweetAesthete]

How the hell did they only get 2.8 gpas with Adderall if they are already neurotypical? Did they try to fail? 😂

[@lisagenerette2443]

I was also diagnosed at age 50 (a few months ago). I can't believe how much I struggled my whole life! 😢 Main regret was not pursuing something I was passionate about for a career.

[@a.j.santiago303]

Ouch! Your words hit me hard, especially your last sentence. I feel the exact same way. I have plenty of supporters tell me it’s never too late to pursue my passions, but sometimes that same regret kicks in and weighs me down. I’m working on it, though. Here’s to those like us-including us-that struggle with this. However, we can do it. Best of luck on your journey!🙂👍🏽🙏🏽

[@officialWWM]

I have the same regrets.

[@DBKING04020]

That line in the Pink Floyd song : “…10 years have got behind you. No one told you when to run, you missed the starting gun…” always scared me. I wasn’t diagnosed until after 40, I know now how much more I could have been. On the up side, I had developed multiple coping mechanisms (not very effective) because my parents didn’t buy into the whole ADHD thing when I was a kid. All through school I heard “…could be so much more if he/she would just” 1) apply themselves, or 2) put some effort in, 3) try harder

[@tamtammaine4242]

I am 51 and just diagnosed because I wanted to go to college and never even went to high school. Got my GED and starting in the fall. Maybe it's too late but I if I don't try I wont know. I cant help wondering where i would be if i had known earlier.

[@kimberlywills7219]

@@tamtammaine4242 I started going back to school at 46. I got my BS in Nutrition in 2020, and my master's last May, a year ago, at 51. I have not started my career like I thought, and after a horrible past year and a therapist, I am NOW (at 52) just learning I might have ADHD. It is NOT too late for us to start a new chapter! I wish you all the best!!

[@Heyu7her3]

I definitely get sick of people 😅 but that's because I have avoidant tendencies. I have noticed that many neurodivergent women don't get evaluated until after they're married/ a mom. Because of how overwhelming that seems, I often wonder if they would've chosen the same life had they known.

[@CarenMagill]

I would love to see more women getting diagnosed earlier in life so they can be empowered to make better choices for their lives.

[@RenegadeContext]

I was diagnosed with autism 3 years ago and ADHD two weeks ago. I'm 40. I've never had the capacity to maintain relationships or have children because of my "mental health" would have liked to know what it was instead of just struggling for 40 years. I'm a little jealous of the women who had late diagnosis but still had the capacity to live a normal life. I know they have their struggles so I tell myself that shit isn't helpful but given the choice I would have liked the less fucked up version

[@wendyhannan2454]

Every one with a late diagnosis wished they had of known earlier, especially women. I’d still marry and still have kids, no doubt about that. Life would of been so much easier had I’d known what I was dealing with. I’d like a dollar for every ADHD person that said that. I except what I have, and I realise how tough at times it’s been, and will be, I know I’m ok, and I can work with it. Thanks to these lovely ladies on UTube, who are so successful, and are living proof you can work and achieve with this condition, their inspirational, and so are all you Addhers out there.😉

[@lauraneuhold92]

​@@wendyhannan2454not everyone wishes they'd known earlier. I am undecided on that. My first impulse was, "yes, I wish I 'd been dx as a kid", but in reality, not much was known about it back then, so not sure I would have gotten effective help. Plus I know me & if I'd had the "label" earlier, I'm not sure I wouldn't have been "woe is me" about it.

[@Yosetime]

@@lauraneuhold92 I think there is some truth in that. My youngest sister was diagnosed with ADD around the late 70's. We just called it "hyper". And boy was she hyper! Doc told my mom to take her off of all sugar and artificial colorings and all that. Didn't work. She was never helped in any way, no medication, and ended up with a brutal life. She was murdered by her boyfriend in 2007. And somehow we always knew she was not going to make it. She had addiction problems, relationship problems, she didn't know how to do life. And nobody helped her. Not even me. I feel guilty to this day as I've just been diagnosed at age 55 and have had to do that life review we do when getting diagnosed. What an eye opener! I ended up not going the way she did even though I was undiagnosed. Thankfully. But I could have. Scares me to think of that.

[@jimbicknell7253]

I was diagnosed at 50. I'm 52, divorced for a second time, and have zero money.....ever......negative to negative bank account between checks, no retirement to speak of. I'm a hot mess wrapped in a dumpster fire. I make the most money I've ever made, but now half my check goes to support, which I have no problem with. I created my children, it's my responsibility to support them. I didn't quite expect to have everything taken away and live in poverty though. There's never been a day of my adult life where I didn't need money and felt like shit because of it. I'm not even sure where I was going with this....I workout, then quit when I start looking good. Self sabotage is a HUGE thing for me.

[@wordzmyth]

​@@keithmarlowe5569 Not sure how it works in the US but in NZ I was recommended a telehealth psychiatry clinic that specialises in ADHD diagnosis. It was definitely the cheapest option with the shortest wait times

[@grendel.6.531]

You’re not the only one ☝️

[@alexmule1997]

I was diagnosed on 9/9/23 for the first at 45. The retrospective of my life with ADHD in mind is wild

[@KellenAdair]

I can imagine. I'm thinking it's not adhd. But, 71 year's of somewhat similar experiences. Since it's more of an Adhd. And more than mild, post Trauma.

[@rixatrix]

I just got diagnosed this past Friday, and I turned 40 in October. So one, hi friend. 😊 Two, I had therapy later that day and I said, “Imagine who I might have been if I had known this whole time?” My life is great, it’s not about accomplishments-it’s about how much less HARD on myself I would’ve been and how I would’ve looked for alternative solutions to help me with the things I thought were just personal/moral failings. The life retrospective IS wild. I have so much compassion for our younger selves who just had to figure it out while they were totally in the dark. I hope you’re doing well post-diagnosis!

[@protectpeacepower]

Sounds like a , dang what is it called? a comic book story in pamphlet form.

[@harrietcraig6716]

THANK YOU for this. I can’t tell you how comforting it is to know that we “misfits” aren’t alone. The 50+ club also has the initial hurdle of coming from a generation where family and friends just thought “that’s just her (weird, childish and offensive) personality.” 👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻 Instant sub.

[@yukonsusie]

Yep. Never heard of ADHD in the 70’s, 80’s, 90’s, then it was something “modern kids” had. We didn’t get diagnosed in our day, we got spanked and shamed and told what we perceived wasn’t correct, like the hypersensitive nose or touch. And I’m only coming to this ADHD thing being “real” for me in past few months at age 56. I had no idea so many things were connected. 🤷🏻‍♀️

[@harrietcraig6716]

@@yukonsusie oh Yes-absolutely! I wasn’t diagnosed until late 40s-lonnnnnnnnng after every person I EVER met would say “that’s just her personality.” 🙄 But I thought you were talking about an economic-level-type judgment. I get it now 👍🏻

[@yukonsusie]

@@harrietcraig6716 nope, we were raised in an upper middle class home, same patterns in my poor friends’ families. It was not connected to economics in my experience. I’ve compared notes with lots of friends over the years. Yes, there were different pressures for the “rich kids” vs “poor kids” - but in my day, rural Canada, pretty much anyone could afford a horse, lots of families had fields and barns, so economics played out very differently in those days too.

[@daisy1022]

​@yukonsusie Well, you just enlightened me about being connected.... I Never realized my nose and touch sensitivities had anything to do with my "disability" Thank you for sharing. ❤

[@ChooseLoveToday316]

I actually agree about kids. If someone is not desiring to be a parent they should not. I made the same choice because my family tree has numerous disorders. Edit: prioritizing Finances and Exercise is a great strategy. Good advice.

[@CarenMagill]

Thank you! This decision probably served me more than any other.

[@shaunhall6834]

I'm 60 now and just dealing with my ADHD now. I also have dyslexia and that was diagnosed when I was a teenager. The thing I want to share here is to be mindful of being kind to yourself at all times. Everything you said here is gold. I'll be moving forward and not looking back. Living in the here and now is all we can do.

[@CarenMagill]

well said!!! thank you for sharing that.

[@kimmfitzgerald434]

Thank you for this reminder. It's key to living well.

[@kellyhazen3994]

I guess I am lucky I was diagnosed as a child. As a teacher, I cannot tell you how many children I have helped understand themselves and give them resources to live a healthy somewhat normal life. My go to is to work in my garden.This grounds me and helps me focus. I use 2 planners, One for work one for Home. I have been married for over 30 years to a very patient husband. And Siri has become my best friend.

[@Sandi-zh2wx]

This is my life exactly, except I'm a nurse. Gardening is so calming that I can spend all day out there depending on the weather. I can't stand heat, but I'll garden all day in the rain.i have 2 planners, and I coordinate them every day. Except I'm 61 and my therapist just brought up ADD to me a cpl weeks ago. She asked if I'd been diagnosed, I told her no, I def don't have it. Pretty sure I do 🤦‍♀️

[@BagasKJ]

The fact that I can't focus on the video because it's too long clearly depicts my ADHD 😭

[@mymoodmyvibez7111]

I have restarted it several times😂

[@heidikamrath1951]

1.25 speed

[@joshna2284]

Yeah same😅

[@joshna2284]

But I'm not sure about adbd

[@michelafortuna7003]

I’m keeping myself busy with the comment section so I can follow it 💪

[@ktwhimsy6946]

As a single mom of 2 teenage boys who also have ADHD, I will say: it’s a challenge. It creates a lot of additional shame to not only feel like you aren’t living up to your own potential, but to then be responsible for kids who need consistency & routine to thrive, when those areas are your pitfalls as well. I was only recently diagnosed with inattentive type at 36 & knew absolutely nothing about ADHD prior…. I went through an intense range of emotion as I learned about it & realized how much it had truly impacted my life - so many things make sense through that particular lens! I’m thankful at least that my boys have a support system & understanding from both their dad & myself (we aren’t together but remain friends & coparents)

[@Norfolkaeta]

I too am 52 and was misdiagnosed early on… Today’s talk was spot on and made me realize why I HAVE to exercise and more recently started deep diving into learning how to invest. Another note, I am the creative type but was so entrenched into being a successful business woman but I failed time after time. I married at 40, my husband is younger but is the most balanced person I’ve ever had in my life. Thanks girl! You’re like my new BFF

[@CarenMagill]

Thank you for the kind words!!!

[@lindalyons3223]

I have to exercise too. I get overwhelmed because I think it has to be everyday. I, too, am hoping to learn how to invest. Do you have any youtube video suggestions for learning? It can be overwhelming for me.

[@tomfilipiak690]

Diagnosed at 58 years old. I was not a hot mess ever. All indications would be that I achieve things fairly well and do pretty well in life but sometimes things are off in a way that people want to criticize. I have always had coping skills that I fell into, without realizing it, that keep me mostly on track. Fairly well organized, mostly on top of life but EVERYTHING is a struggle. EVERYTHING is hard. EVERYTHING takes big effort. And frequently I get things almost right or mostly right. My wife and bosses were all the same, they come down on me hard for not performing and doing what they want, never acknowledging that everyone is different. They want communication their way too. And none of them understand the squirrels running around in my brain...even at 3 AM. #4...both spouse (wife) and career/job have been love/hate always. I give and give and give and get very little from them. I am so uninspired by them. And yes, exercise, enough sleep, good diet (though currently mine is lousy), maintaining a calendar, communicating expectations, boundaries, etc. All good stuff, especially the exercise.

[@addictedfoolgamer1970]

I hope someone, somewhere in your life is on your side. It sounds tough for you.

[@evilbutterfly8]

I understand getting the criticism on things being slightly "off" I'll look at an art piece or something I drew up and be like "That looks good, I think that explains everything." But the criticism I get feels so out of left field, they'll say "whats that mean?" And point to something that was just inconceivable to me. Leaving me in my thoughts like "THATS whats confusing to you??? How!? What?? I didn't think that could be a problem at all!!" Ive always questioned if people were just stupid or if there was something fundamentally wrong with how I did things 😅 (could be a little of both depending on context)

[@daisy1022]

Finally, somebody has verbalized that EVERYTHING is hard. Thanks for sharing.

[@HumanProject2024]

I totally understand you. I feel exactly the same. I can ‘do’ my life but EVerything is hard. I’m 52. As I start this journey of learning about my brain and accepting myself I hope to find peace. Hang in there ❤

[@barfumadchen2592]

Thank u for being honest about the decision not to get children. I'm 35, diagnosed with Audhd at 34. My first marriage broke (not only, but mainly) because I didn't want to have kids after I started exercising with 29 and was the first time in my life happy with my body and my mind. My new partner doesn't want to have kids either and my ex has a toddler with his new wife. So everyone is happy now, nonetheless would it been easier and healthier for me to get my diagnosis earlier on in life.

[@katherinetucker4360]

High five to not having kids when you know it’s not for you…was the same for me & I’m sooooo glad I listened to that because I knew that early on. I think that’s an important message for young worker- that it’s OK to not want/have kids if that’s your truth! ❤ (PS: I wish I’d “cleaned habits up” earlier like you. Better late than never!)

[@martin.ballard]

Diagnosed at 60. I'm convinced the reason so many people get diagnosed late is that it gets worse. I have also just been diagnosed with lupus, which I've had my whole life. I have a lot of rebuilding to do.

[@sandrainontario6710]

I am 74 just self-diagnosed and I have an appointment Monday with my doctor to be referred for testing. I totally agree that it gets worse. I can see the difference even just in the last year.

[@VivSees]

You are correct. Untreated/undiagnosed it gets worse over the years. Life gets out of control and you feel powerless to solve it all. We are forced to seek a diagnosis because we innately know something is not working right in our minds.

[@susanshearer6106]

I was just diagnosed with ADHD today! I am 63 and my symptoms got much worse after menopause.

[@martin.ballard]

@@susanshearer6106 64 tomorrow. I have spent 2 years re-learning how to do everything. I don't foresee going off the meds, but maybe if I really tune up the exercise. ADHD is a massive neurological drag coefficient.

[@ThisIsTheSalon]

Autoimmune disease diagnosis at 39, diagnosed with ADHD at 45 but suspect my late mother, who also had lupus, had undiagnosed ADHD. Tried talking to my consultants about ADHD and autoimmune link and they weren’t really into it but have friends with both and sure there’s something going on.

[@rixatrix]

Two years ago I started working for myself, and I just got diagnosed with ADHD. Turns out that entrepreneurs are MUCH more likely to have ADHD (ans ADHDers are MUCH more likely to become entrepreneurs) and I can totally see why. I still struggle with some of the organizational things, but 1) I get to choose work that excites me and 2) fellow business owners are some of the greatest people I’ve ever met. I worked in advertising for 16 years, and it can be a volatile, hostile place. Stressful for no good reason. Political. Petty. Executives think they win by making other people lose. Now, my community of fellow (mostly female) business owners says things like, “What is your dream? How can we help you get there?” And “Are you charging me ENOUGH for your work/your full rate?” So career advice: Sometimes stepping out on your own may be exactly what your ADHD brain needs. You can get help with the parts you need help with. Find your community, follow your passions and strengths. And even if you don’t become an entrepreneur, sometimes a toxic work environment can just make everything worse.

[@CarenMagill]

100% agree with you on this!!!!

[@Nico-rl1vq]

65 years of dealing with, being defeated occasionally by, and surfing over and under ADHD having no clue what was wrong all along the lost decades has been an interminable roller coaster of a life. Yet, now at 65 and educating myself through good, informative, reliable, trustworthy sources of information and INSTRUCTION has made an indescribably enormous difference in my life!!! Thank you, thank you. These types of videos, books, workbooks, etc. are truly (no hyperbole) lifesaving to me. So many thanks!

[@lancebarker]

Thanks so much for sharing your experience Caren. I’ve just been diagnosed with ADHD at 67! I’m trying to figure out what to do about it: medication, coping skills, etc. I think it’s going to be quite a ride. At least I know that my issues are probably due to the brain chemistry I’ve inherited instead of just thinking that I’m stupid, lazy and weird. Cheers!

[@RedIria]

Are you me?.. I lived with ADHD without knowing it while having the same interests as you, I then got into running by accident, lost 146lb and made every "lucky" move that you did. I read Warren Buffet's advice and became super interested and am now debt free and just accumulating (like you). And I found the right school field and job for me and now have an MS degree and financial independence, like you. One thing is different though, as I will not let anyone try to convince me that my identity was some kind of privilege. I'm white-passing but arrived in this country as a refugee at the age of 9, without knowing a single word of English. I can tell you are free but you can be freer if you stop internalizing the disempowerment and self-hatred that the beliefs of racial "privilege" lead to. You know you struggled badly and earned everything you have. Don't let them take that away from you!

[@ayanisss]

i loved this video a lot!! and i especially appreciate you acknowledging the privilege you have that others may not, knowing that doing that doesn't diminish your story. i'm from the philippines and neurodivergence barely means anything here, so i have to default to american resources and content creators to learn about my adhd. that's why it's so important to me when i find content like yours that speaks to me even though we're worlds apart. anyway, i just wanted to send love and i'm glad the algorithm brought you to my feed.

[@KellenAdair]

Me too, on that algorithm thing. I'm 71 and starting to think mine might be more severe than I thought. My sibs were bad.

[@nanidogmomstevens6386]

That’s me! 73. Married for 52 years but I know it’s been hard for him. Still working on my chaos and I feel a little more balanced. Great interpretation‼️Thank you‼️👩🏻‍🦳☦️Be blest fellow ADHD friends.

[@yelhsarose]

I got diagnosed this year with inattentive ADHD, after my divorce and your videos are helping me so much. I can’t thank you enough for your time, advice, and content.

[@CarenMagill]

My pleasure! I'm glad it helps.

[@mariz9157]

yes um yes and yes you about covered my whole life 😂 diagnosed at 47 and proud. My entire life made sense with one little sentence “You have ADHD”. After 6 kids ages 30, 25, 17,17, 11,9 ( all diagnosed Neurodivergent) l still don’t understand how people manage to make diner and still have time to take a walk ?! And yes chaos everyday but wouldn’t change a thing we are blessed❤Ty!

[@TJNorton]

So helpful, thank you ... I am as yet undiagnosed, but am 55 years old and tick all the boxes. My regular coping methods include going to the beach first thing in the morning to run/walk/do breathing and sensory awareness exercises, stretching, eating a low starch paleo based diet, meditation, yoga, martial arts, limiting time in overstimulating environments (cant do big crowds etc without feeling drained), 12 step program, spending time with friends, time alone to chill, going to bed early enough to get a healthy amount of sleep, listening to relaxing tone based music, having specific places where i always put basic things like keys etc. Thanks again for sharing your experience 🙏

[@srslyawkward3095]

I just got diagnosed with ADHD a couple of months ago (right before my 50th birthday). I feel like your videos also share my story, which makes me feel less alone in this journey.

[@bumblebee_ms]

I have a feeling there are a lot more of us out there but no one ever spoke about it out of shame.

[@Chippy88]

Any job I ever had I always succeeded and got promoted. The more chaotic the job is the better I do. I could never do a boring job.

[@nanci_sousa]

Ahahahah this is fantastic! Personally, I could never do it but I’m glad someone could successfully make it! ❤

[@sheilaboland6285]

Every job I had I was fired from and I have a Master’s degree.

[@josettebushell-mingo1870]

I am 59, ADHD and dyslexia..this is sustaining me.. thank you ⭐️

[@KellenAdair]

My little bro was born in 58, and had both very severely.

[@Missponderlit]

I felt like you were speaking to me when you said “has a million ideas a day” lol 😂

[@CarenMagill]

Yep, that's my brain!

[@SaltyBeach]

Same!! 🙌 lol

[@Yosetime]

If I had a quarter for every idea I have in a day......I wouldn't need a job!! lol

[@italianrostrataps6938]

My very grounded husband looks worried whenever I say, "I've been thinking..." I'm an ideas person!😉

[@italianrostrataps6938]

You realise I only found this wonderful presenter because of my ADHD...I was working on my lesson plan for tomorrow...but got distracted!!😅

[@mossyoakmom8880]

I haven’t been dx but I do seem to have ADHD. I was really on top of things until I had kids. It’s been a struggle but I wouldn’t change anything! My family, husband, kids and now also grandkids have truly been the best thing in my life. My kids are grown now but I’m very grateful for our close relationships!

[@MyMerryMessyGermanLife]

Your videos are so helpful! Okay so we moved from the USA to Germany two years ago with our four kids. Suffice it to say, for a person with undiagnosed ADHD, it was a logistical nightmare. I hit burnout before we ever arrived because of the massive amount of executive functioning it took to even move. I experienced insomnia and debilitating anxiety for the first time in my life. I could barely take care of my kids, let alone, myself. Two of our children really struggled as well and it turns out one of them has ADHD as well! Anyway, it’s been a tornado these past few years for me. I’m not out of the woods yet. I’m on Ritalin and in therapy, but am still feeling a lot of anxiety. Anyway, your videos are super helpful. I used to be a ballet dancer and teacher and I think that movement helped me to function, and I didn’t realize that until I started following you. I struggled some as a teenager, but it got a lot worse after I graduated college. And that was when I stopped dancing everyday! I started being really impulsive and making poor decisions. So thank you for the reminder about how much movement helps. I’m intentional to move everyday, but knowing it helps my ADHD brain motivates me a lot more! 💕

[@nickiboy33]

I got diagnosed 3 weeks ago. I'm 50 years old. My diagnose in medical terms: Inattentive Type, Mild(DSM 5 code: 314.00) - in FIFITY YEARS, I went around knowing in the back of my head I had this condition without thinking about diving deeper and deal with it, I was partially afraid and partially ignorant. Now when I look back, it is the root cause of everything: my jumpy career, suck in school, people pleasing, bad self esteem, depression, anxiety, broken relationships, addiction and at the end : a divorce! AAAAAAAAAAH! But better late than never! Now I have to look forward and do what I can to put my life back together again, with more intelligence and knowledge!

[@SusanaXpeace2u]

Same, I knew something was DIFFERENT.

[@nickiboy33]

@@SusanaXpeace2u Best of luck! Focus on a brighter future , you got this :)

[@pintsizedlife]

I feel very seen by you and your experiences. I am 34, and just got my diagnosis. I'm sure my mother is ADHD, and she taught herself some really helpful tools. She was always so organized with lists and calendars. I definitely brought those skills with me into my life, and thank goodness, I am positive I would not have done so well academically if she didn't teach me them. I'm also a sucker for writing on my hand lol.

[@ThisIsTheSalon]

Sure about my mother, too. She worked as an executive PA so could be highly organised at work and always looked glamorous and was a bit of a tyrannical perfectionist. After she passed away going through all her hoarded clutter made me realise there was a lot of chaos behind the scenes. She was highly organised when it came to things she was into it but not with everything. Also, bad relationships and was super on it with finances because an experience of baliffs at the door when she was younger. So much masking and wish she could have been diagnosed.

[@normanleach5427]

About that yoga and meditation, and what grounds you while being mindful ...vs... the trigger zone. "Whatever you put your attention on you get more of..."

[@HSunday40]

I’m 41. I was diagnosed with combined type ADHD at 37. I wasn’t treated until the month before I turned 41. Absolutely life-changing! Looking back, I see all the signs I missed as a kid & young adult. I’m just very thankful I was led to get diagnosed & treated, no matter how late in life. I also have fibromyalgia. Once I was treated for ADHD, I noticed my physical symptoms were becoming milder. It’s amazing how our mental & emotional suffering has such a huge influence on our physical bodies.

[@letsbehonest01]

I was diagnosed in my late 50's. I had a wonderful PCP who listened and recommended a therapist to help make the diagnosis. I was constantly ricocheting from one thing to another, always starting things and not following through, always distracted, making impulsive decisions and always depressed because I felt with all the energy I put forth, I did not see to many rewards, and I was just tired from not accomplishing what I wanted to complete. I was put on a small dose of Adderall, and it really made a huge difference in my life. I know medication is a debatable subject, but for me, it made a positive difference in my life . Looking back at my old self, I see how strong I was to keep plugging along, but I enjoy my relationships so much more now. I feel fulfilled in so many ways now because I have routinely accomplished what I set out to do.

[@willywagtail4182]

❤

[@js-93308]

You're such an inspiration, thank you! 💜 I feel the same, kids are amazing & such a blessing, but I knew early on being a mom wasn't for me and was lucky enough to find a partner who felt the same. In my 20s I hyper focused on exercise, another right choice. I didn't get the financial monster under control though... It's still a struggle, but I haven't lost hope. I went undiagnosed for 56 years undiagnosed, I'm 8 months into living with my new reality, so I'm going to cut myself some slack on the $$... Tomorrow is a new day 🌅

[@Cigodesign]

This video is incredibly useful. I listened to all the video without getting distracted. This probably means that your communication skills and the level of the content are very high. I mean, you also have Adhd so you can feel me!

[@RedRubyrita1]

Had the same thoughts about kids but couldn’t verbalize it until I was diagnosed at 41❤

[@Chippy88]

Me too. I’m 51. But I knew I had it. I wish I knew all this years ago. I also had OCD terribly, so I really focused on that. It was hard as I have the boy kind for lack of a better word of ADHD. Hyper as shit. Teachers hated me. I would just stand up in the classroom and walk out because it was so boring. I cut people off, talk, fast, walk fast etc. I could still do some of the things I did when I was 18 but then I started realizing that it looks stupid to act that way when you’re in your 40s and now 50. Yeah, I want to class clown at work. I always make friends. But you know how many people told me that before they got to know me that I was on cocaine. And I can say that I make people nervous just because of my energy. So I finally started to look into it and I started a an ADHD medicine. I can tell you one thing it’s much easier methods to use than trying to fight OCD. But I almost think I might be able to get off my OCD medicine after looking into ADHD. Things that I learned so far is when I text somebody do not text them until they text back. I’m extremely impulsive I mean I’m like the textbook ADHD. The counting to five before I spoke didn’t really work I was finding it was too long. Lol I mean think about it for a second if you count to five seconds correctly, it’s kind of long before the other person talks. It’s almost like I told my daughter to bring duck tape wherever I go. So I gotta work on that maybe I gotta count to five faster. But what does help a lot and again it’s some thing I saw where they said no matter what you do. With ADHD whether it be anything talk to somebody or you’re gonna do something. PAUSE. The lady that I learned that from sad new matter what very important before you do something say pause and think about it when I remember to apply those things I feel so good. I am just so so sensitive and emotional to the point where nobody even asked why I’m crying and I don’t blame them. I told all my friends and family if I’m talking fast you have to tell me. But I’m so happy that I am with all my might making myself aware a lot myself while I’m talking to talk slow. I mean it’s embarrassing. So I’m gonna continue watching your video now and thank you so much for sharing.😊

[@JohnGeorge-pw2xo]

I started smoking cannabis 18 years ago as a teenage, later switched to cigarettes. Spent my whole life fighting Cigarettes addiction. I suffered severe depression and mental disorder. Got diagnosed with ADHD. Cigarettes addiction actually destroyed my life. Not until my wife recommended me to psilocybin mushrooms treatment. Psilocybin treatment saved my life honestly. 6 years totally clean. Never thought I would be saying this about mushrooms.

[@ErnestoHorner88]

Can you help me with the reliable source 🙏. I'm 56 and have suffered for years with addiction, anxiety and severe ptsd, I got my panic attacks under control myself years ago and they have come back with a vengeance, I'm constantly trying to take full breaths but can't get the full satisfying breath out, it's absolutely crippling me, i live in Germany. I don't know much about these mushrooms. Really need a reliable source!! Can't wait to get them

[@CathieGomez-mp8sk]

YES sure of Dr.benfungi. Did straight shrooms in few days. Left me like a blank slate after words, no more addictions, pains, ptsd and depression. Shit saved my life, all thanks to Dr.benfungi

[@Iiisslogan-co6np]

How do I reach out to him? Is he on insta

[@JacksonSmith-wc8oo]

Yes he's Dr.benfungi.Shrooms to me is a natrual healer. I know a guy who has used mushrooms in the same way and they have really helped him. mah dudes have safe trips all.

[@ChristopherEric-fr8im]

From my experience it really works excellently! It doesnt even need to be a full hit. With potent shrooms 2-3 small ones will still make a clear difference. It will be a few hour cosy rumbling moment around rest time, but afterwards its just calm and you feel amazing and gain your freedom. Psilocybin is different dudes, its the only "treatment" I would recommend to someone who genuinely wants to get better. There is no addiction, withdrawal, or negative side effects. It's just pure healing., far more effective than any anti-depressant. You can thank me later,

[@johnmadden9575]

Married for 30 years to a gracious woman who understands my undiagnosed (but very obvious) ADHD. She is patient with me but I still know it's been a struggle for her. My faith and my wife help keep me grounded. Along with a plethora of hobbies! Thanks for sharing!

[@teresastorms3774]

OMG, you just described me exactly. I'm 55 and my finances are a mess. I am currently taking the Dave Ramsey Financial Peace University course online to help me get my shiz together. This has been such great advice, I'm taking notes in my journal. Absolute gold!

[@mrjohncrumpton]

Rich dad poor dad is also good.

[@rosalindarcher6060]

How did you get on? I’m 55 and broke and scared I’m out of time. Also scared of advice to trust because so much is sakes and feels like a scam. All I’ve done is bury my head in the sand…

[@teresastorms3774]

@rosalindarcher6060 the course was great. I'm scared to death about "retirement" too. I've not even been at my current job for 10 years. I'm just being as diligent as I can to keep up with where my money is going. I wish you luck and all kinds of abundance!

[@rosalindarcher6060]

@@teresastorms3774 thanks so much for getting back to me! I’m so glad the course was good. I’ll look it up although I am Uk based so it may not be relevant over here. Thank you too for your kind wishes. You’ve done the only positive thing anyone can do, which is make a start and I wish you all the very best of luck with it all too. My ADHD has me running about in all directions mentally (like a sprinter spaniel when its owner comes home, racing round picking up multiple toys as presents, then dropping them and dashing onto the next one!) so I’m gloomy about my prospects of making a start even, let alone following on with it. But well done for squaring up to it. You should be very proud!

[@paulaborodusko6270]

I believe in you! Wish you the biggest luck of it! My therapist said - Your hand is an extension of your soul@@rosalindarcher6060 Write as simple as possible and you will get there! If you want tip, I can send picture of how simple it can be. The hardest thing it s to do it again next day and so. It s with alarms, which I also struggle to do it daily, but I have good tip of how to write simple finanse in paper notes.

[@sherileyva5908]

I just found your channel today and I could not agree with you more. I am 49 and just realized this year how much of my life was chaos just trying to survive. I got sober 5 years ago and 2 yrs ago I started walking every day and just 3 months ago I joined a gym and I wake up everyday at 4AM to go exercise and then come home and walk a mile barefoot because these first 3 hours of my day are the best hours of each day. Exercise has absolutely changed my life. I will never ever stop because it makes me feel so much better!!

[@szakacselod8452]

"i no longer rely on my brain to remember things, that's a terrible place to store things you need to remember" this is hilarious... ly painfully familiar. It is like a standup bit that is soo funny... but only because is sooo true

[@michaelbuelow9275]

I was diagnosed with ADHD inattentive type a few weeks before my 71st birthday. Only after seeking professional consultation following months of watching KZbin videos on the subject. The pHD immediately agreed with me after telling my story. Knowing made me happy because it explained much of my failures and frustrations. It lifted my self doubt and allowed me to follow my interests while avoiding pitfalls that I had identified. It also made me very sad that I wasn't diagnosed so much earlier. My life would have been so much better if I had not spent all of it beating my head against impossible goals and expectations. I also failed to take on challenges that I would have done well at.

[@economics12]

Thank you so much for excellent advice. I wish I had been mentored earlier and this channel deserves a million subscribers as there are so many people out there who could save billions collectively from prevention which is better than the cure.

[@CarenMagill]

Thank you for the kind words!! That's why I'm so passionate about this work.

[@uta3339]

I'm soo happy, that your channel found me! At 57 of age I was finally diagnosed with ADHD and now so many things, that I experienced in my life, make sense. Listening to you gives me hope, that I also can get better and feel worthful again. My currend situation is especally hard, because I have to deal with Post-COVID. I can say, that living such a hopeless life is barely to endure... But listening to you is like the sun has risen above my clouts of sorrow! Now, I have the hope, I could manage it too, to get back on my tracks! I was always the funny and active girl- and I'm going to get back to happyness- Yes, I'll archive that... Thank you soooo much! ❤

[@sarahbyrne1547]

I'm so happy to have found this station! The comments are also so relatable. I recently found Yin Yoga as a way to exercise when my body is tired and my mind is racing. I truly appreciate the discussion on children as well. My career in education exposes me to many, many children and I have always felt shamed by coworkers and parents for choosing to not have kids. It is interesting to hear other people made this choice and did not regret it. I feel like it is still taboo for a woman to admit this. Thank you and I look forward to seeing more of your well spoken, hit the nail on the head content:)

[@Renegade_Minds]

Okay, Ladyyy. I am listening to this while putting on my makeup in preparation to record an audition, all while fighting back the tears. Only these past couple months did I realize that I am living ADHD. Thank you for being here.

[@xxpadmoondaze1282]

Thank you so much for this video 💖 Another obstacle for me at an young age is, I'm pushing through life alone and the loneliness hurts. Do you have tips for dealing with difficult emotions like that? You should make a video delving deeper into that (if you haven't already). Due to this I think it really messes with a person's overall health and emotional regulation.

[@CarenMagill]

I'm sorry you're feeling lonely. That's becoming more and more common. But it's such an individual experience. I'm not sure how I would address that in a global sense. I'll give it some thought !

[@angelacaires8772]

I appreciate your sharing:) I am 65 now and realized I am adhd when my son was diagnosed at 12. I am still learning about myself. After being married 4 times and having lots of jobs (even though in the same career) I have finally reached the age to be able to focus on how I can arrange my life to maximize my strengths.

[@paulaborodusko6270]

I feel you!

[@tonymarshall3162]

Loved this conversation … perfect … very easy to listen to you and just diagnosed at age 51 . Definitely feel a connection to your content ! Thank you so much ! Feel like I can breathe and find acceptance of myself and start to turn the self hate titanic around.

[@ht7cs]

Wow, yes! That self-hate thing is a bugger fir us late-diagnosis people. Being mis-labled all your life. Those things in your past are NOT you. I pray you'll start seeing the miraculous person that you truly are. This is GOOD day. Keep looking forward.

[@tonymarshall3162]

@@ht7cs thank you Sarah for the thoughtful and encouraging words ! I really appreciate it !

[@Fromaplaceoflove1971]

Thank you for acknowledging your privilege. I am 53 and have been diagnosed for about a year now. It has been good days and bad. But I feel encouraged even more becasue there are WAY more resources than we had growing up.

[@ElodieRichard-hc7fs]

What works for me as I cannot focus more than 5 or 10 minutes is that I cut down the activity I have into sections. I work for 10 minutes, I stop than I go back for another 10 minutes ect. It is very important to know how long can you focus on something and deal with it. don't try to force it , it will never work.

[@Daniellelebelle412]

35-years old woman and I suspect I have ADHD. No diagnosis but I fit a lot of the symptoms (daydreaming constantly even mid conversation, irritable / mood swings, starting projects but getting bored half way through, extreme difficulty concentrating on mundane tasks). This video was very informative and encouraging. I love all of the ideas as far as taking care of your WHOLE self (exercise, finances). You seem very relatable not stigmatizing. Thank you!

[@sanpellegrinolimonata]

Your advice about being educated in financial stuff prompted me to open up an app i downloaded however long ago, that has lessons about finance. Went down the rabbit hole a bit, got scarred looking through my bank statements, but now i’ve cancelled my prime membership and will switch banks soon so i can get the switch over $$$ :)

[@michellenolan6435]

I just discovered your channel. You are one smart cookie. I’m also 52 and have a sneaky suspicion that I have ADHD. 2 of my 3 sons have been diagnosed and my husband kept nudging me during the dr visit telling us our middle son had it. I was surprised he thought so but when home and cried that night from relief. It was an AHA moment that I wasn’t a ditzy blonde, or a chatterbox, or the lady who loves to brainstorm a million and one potential ideas but can’t seem to finish any one project. It is possible that I’m neurodivergent! I tried to ask my dr about it and she said- you don’t strike me as someone with adhd. I left feeling embarrassed and confused. Then I recently thought- I need to see a professional, not her. She sees me once a year for like 15 minutes; she has NO idea how hard it is being me and all the things I struggle with. I’m going to try again and ask for a referral to someone who knows about adhd and they can determine the outcome. Thanks for your encouraging video- that it’s never too late to get started.

[@kayliemcintosh7841]

I love that you said you were happy not having kids. Because same.

[@MultiSomeoneawesome]

Thankyou so much I felt deeply inspired by this share and also.. Wow you look so vibrant and well, like all your efforts shine through. Bless ups for this heartfelt insight.

[@MsPseudonymous]

I was diagnosed in my 30’s. I would joke about having ADD. And then a therapist simply listened to me and at about our 6 session asked me to take a test on a iPad. Yep. I actually do have ADHD. I had been using caffeine, nicotine, and CBT my whole life to manage it. I also use a system called point of service to manage my household. Meaning all my clothes live in the laundry room - they just recycle there. I have a coffee station, etc.. I can also multitask like a boss!! Yep. It doesn’t have to be hard some of it can be used to benefit me.

[@daveistrading]

I found that the most important part is having a partner that understands and allows you to customize your life to manage your ADHD. I also recommend getting a basic (no fancy ice maker) double-wide refrigerator, so you can organize meal prep - make it easier to put together a healthy meal.

[@lorrainewilson4002]

Great input ..so relevant ..especially for us of a more ' mature age' .. I had three days at work & two to recover .. oh it can be tough when I'm in ' freeze' mode..I find I'm getting better at accepting its all part of my different ' wiring' ..ADHD Other things have been & still are great ways of getting some mental , physical and emotional balance Meditating , walking and my favourite is paddleboarding /cold water therapy ... And definitely monitor what I'm watching as your so right about the ' impulse buying' or next ' fix' ... I ended up with 5 or 6 ' projects' & then the shame trigger switches on .. Learn healthy strategies , and practice the ' switch ' .. 😊

[@GrowEvolve78]

You channel is a GODSEND! I'm a 40yo mom who is realizing I have undiagnosed ADHD and am actively looking for ways to make it work for me. I've spent most of my adult life wondering why I can't complete this task or stay focused on this business. Why I cant get life right. Finding people who have worked through it is helping a ton.

[@samanthaspencer7404]

Really appreciate hearing that....I am 50 and am totally seeing where bad past choices have brought me today. I have not been diagnosed but am pretty certain about my profile. Realising today that every choice has been a coping mechanism! Money and health have been one long battle. Inconsistency my middle name 😊 How does one move out of a freeze mode (burnout)after so many psychological and physical blows? I have all the tools in hand, but with my scattered brain it all seems sooooo overwhelming 😮 Being a mum is just one long run of guilt of underfunctioning towards their needs. I am so hard on myself and have lost view of that positive happy go lucky person I once was and have lost sight of under all the pressures of life. All is good but everyday is complicated in the simplest of challenges today. Thanks for your encouraging video Love from France

[@CarenMagill]

You've got to find ways to manage your nervous system so you can recover better from life's blows. Walking outside, meditation, yoga, breath work.... these things work!

[@openyourmind3763]

I am 51 and relate to everything you said. My teen was diagnosed with high functioning autism and has taught me so much. I would like to be more consistent with my healthy lifestyle habits and creative goals, but learning to accept myself and work with my challenges helps a lot. I am always working on simplifying my life and home, love working from home now and hoping in 2 years to move to a small town and downsize. I hate the traffic and overwhelming strip malls where I have lived for 30 years. It's draining and distracting and am now realizing how disconnected I have been all these years to push through. Time management is an issue everyday but i use reminders on my phone and my small circle of neurodivergent friends are the same and we are all understanding. Good changes ahead. Exercise and yoga helps and focus music.

[@sabrasandee543]

You summed up the way i have begun to feel. I am 55. Just finally got on meds..not sure if they are the right ones..but its a start. I have hit the Overwhelmed Burned out stage..just want to crawl in a hole sometimes. Its such a struggle. Had i known about this earlier in life..i could have adjusted some things and been in a better place now.

[@Earthisdivine]

Really great stuff. I am 50 and just figuring out/diagnosed with adhd and able to self reflect on my strengths and things I wish I knew, and even better, how empowered I now am and moving forward with these strengths. Thanks for sharing, it is important.

[@artistchristos]

I am the same about why I chose not to have children, Caren. I knew in my teens that I had no interest at all whatsoever in having to push another life out of my body. I knew that I needed to live my life without that lifetime encumbrance and my own mother, who had 3, told me that I did not have to have children to have a fulfilling life. I am in my 60’s and look more than 10 years younger, am on the carnivore diet, and am an accomplished artist. I am a very creative person and an excellent problem solver. I like my own company and don’t get lonely. Have had two significant long term relationships, and live in Australia. I am so glad I never had kids. I hate the sound of crying babies because they sound as if they are dying and it stresses me out! Not having kids is one of the best things I chose to do, for me. I like your talk, today, because your determination led by strong decision making to take charge of your own life is how I am, too. Balancing out the losses, sorrow, fears, etc with the ability to fully enjoy the awesome range of my ever growing interests and skills, being loved and loving, and even making sacrifices for those whose needs may at times be greater than mine, means life is never boring and I can pull back into my quiet room or garden any time I want to just be . The spiritual path is in my nature and knowing Christ Jesus late in life means the spiritual has come full circle, and there is absolute grounding and peace within in Him. I used to say, my life is a trip! and I would not change a thing.

[@apb148]

I was recently diagnosed with ADHD at 57. Since then I have been researching everything I can get my hands on about ADHD. My case also involves the daily struggle of perfectionism, which has been very difficult to navigate. This video has helped me see how my marriage to someone with severe dyslexia has helped me grow in different ways.

[@allisontonkin745]

Hi , love these posts I'm 52 and getting assessed next week I think I'm the innatentive type ....fight flight is huge in my life along with the many other lovely symptoms that come along with it ...🙂 glad I can get some positive tips from you ....I wish I had have found out Years.. b4 this but better late than never . I did mentioned i thought i had it to another phychiatrist 10 years ago but he through that idea straight under the bus I wish I had have gone for another opinion then but everything happens for a reason so here I am @ 52 and yet to be diagnosed 🙂

[@CarenMagill]

Good luck with the diagnosis! Yes - better late than never for sure.

[@lisarocco327]

Not diagnosed, but at 60 still am a “hot mess express”. I knew from a child that I was going to have 2 boys (sister and boyfriend knew also!). So I did have 2 boys and somehow they and I made it through into their adulthood, happy and thriving. Married an Actuary. He is very observant and organized. He laughs at how many boxes get checked for my having ADHD. At 60 I am finally going to try to find a person who can help me and diagnose me.. I keep a Bullet Journal and that really has saved me.

[@elccollins99]

I was diagnosed last year at the age of 53. Since I was in my thirties, I have had trouble keeping organized and motivated at work. As you can imagine, my career has not flourished, and I have been let go from three jobs. I am currently unemployed and feel that, if I am lucky enough to get another job, I will screw up again. Has anyone else had similar feelings?

[@erikakoons7387]

Yes. I have no drive at all. Scary stuff

[@Rs-rq9fd]

Me currently 😢

[@bruceengland9140]

I'm 58 now, still learning about my combined ADD/ADHD. Just started finding a lot of help and knowledge here on You Tune as a matter of fact. Thank you so much. I've figured a lot out, learned to cope well, but you're always learning better techniques and strategies, not just for ADD, bit life, living and general knowledge

[@samanthap.879]

Love this I’m 27 married to a man who is diagnosed ADHD and I’m Realizing I think I also struggle with this after he’s said this for years I never believed him!

[@lifewithmargot]

Now I have two dogs they’re 12 and can stress me out but I do love them so much and so much more manageable than kids 😂

[@druwk]

Great post. I’m 57, and became aware of ADHD when my son was diagnosed 6 years ago. I have done research in order to help, and understand him, I have come suspect (realize? I’m still undiagnosed) that I (probably?) have it as well? I have been coping blindly, like you, with symptoms and stumbling onto solutions both good and bad. I had resided to just keep on the path I stumbled onto, but my mother died recently. Whatever free dopamine in my system left to cope, is now nonexistent. My executive function symptoms are now in full display and I feel crazy. Thank you for the recommendation of exercise, meditation and lists…all solutions I have utilized in the past, but need now more than ever. Don’t know why I resist getting diagnosed?

[@martin.ballard]

I knew I didn't want kids but in my dysfunctional family of origin, not unlike our society, childless means childish. If someone is enough of an a-hole to ask if I regret not having kids, my reply is, 'not as much as they'd regret me having them.'

[@jjQlLlLq]

Very well said! It'd break my already breaking heart to be an insufficient parent to my kid like my parents did to me. Let the more functional folks populate the world, we're in no shortage of humans.

[@mypodfootrehabilitationcen4426]

I couldnt add any more than what you have already mentioned. Everything you've said applies to me. I am undiagnosed almost 50 but im pretty sure i'm ADHD. Trouble is i think my daughter is and i am currently in the process of having her assessed. I just wanted to thank you. You are truely awesome for doing what you're doing and raising awareness.

[@jessicabullock2171]

Studies now are showing that exercise can be AS effective as medicine in many cases!

[@32Flavors]

Validation makes me fall madly in love with you to the point of tears. I am so grateful to every word you say.

[@MagneticMTB]

Nice! Just discovered your channel. I resonate with everything you are saying here. I’m on the same path. 2 Books I want to suggest to other people in this tribe. If you are married or in a relationship: ADHD Effect on Marriage, life changing for me and saved me from ruining it. If you want to get into the super positive aspects and the Hunter Type/Farmer Type philosophy. Drummer and the Great Mountain. My Sacred texts. Thank you!

[@CarenMagill]

thank you for that!!

[@merrilew]

Hi. I am a wee bit over 60 and I just lost my job because of something dumb. I started to go to counseling because I felt lost and when the counselor shared that I might have ADHD my brain exploded. I’ve been looking at a few channels, trying to learn what it is and what it means and I just happened to come across your video this morning April 6, 7 AM. I am Mesmerized. It really struck a nerve when you spoke about children. I am unattached with no children. Except the video right before the finances part because that is where I’m terrified. I just wanted to thank you for opening the door and being the person that has made so much of this makes sense. I look forward to diving deeper into your channel and learning more about myself.xo

[@neridafarrer4633]

I'm at the point of waiting for the drs appointment to get the referral to a dual diagnosis specialist (ADHD+ASD). I'm 50. I have 7 children. Yes, its very hard being a mum with this neuro phenotype, but I don't regret it. My kids are amazing people. And, there are days when I want out of parenting. I'm excited about getting a diagnosis and getting some support to get some wellness, post the 33 years of solid parenting. Youngest is hitting 18 shortly and planning to move away shortly after. So I will have some space to implement better self care, as I'm a burnt out mess!

[@StrategicallyHelpful]

Hi Caren~ I’m about to be 45 in April, and although not all of your points mentioned align with me, your message applies to me to a tee. I also knew at a young age that the way my brain worked was not the same as those around me. And I always had a sense having kids was not something that I wanted to for my future. Fast forward and I’m so grateful to have found a husband who is of the same perspective and he’s always incredibly patient and accepting of my thinking and tendencies. I have not been formally diagnosed- no idea how to go about it. I too have found a lot of fulfillment in exercise and other focuses to maintain my physical and mental wellbeing. To wrap this up, your video really resonated with me and I’ll be tuning into to more of your content so thank you. (PS. For whatever reason, I prefer watching videos at 2x speed. My husband is frequently perplexed as to how I can comprehend what I’m listening to but it’s just a more comfortable speed for my brain. He walked into the room and asked “What are you listening to? It’s sounds like a circus…?” Me: No just watching a women talk about being diagnosed with adhd late in life. Him: 🤦 Thank you for the content!

[@fabulous50s56]

Hi! I’m literally 20 seconds in having an OMG moment… I am 52 and just found out a couple of years ago!!! Ok listening on.

[@fabulous50s56]

I am Canadian too and singing is my exercise. It is my grounding and my happy place.

[@CarenMagill]

So great to connect with you! Always good to meet a fellow canadian.

[@harrietcraig6716]

Same here! Late diagnosis-AFTER I ruined a couple of careers and every relationship.

[@e.a.miller6503]

I don’t have ADHD but can relate to that knowing feeling to not have children. Never regretted it. Thank you for stating this out loud.

[@Alyssa-ui7bf]

Ya know- I’m so split with the kids thing! Sometimes I want kids and other times I feel like with my ADHD/ anxiety/ depression (such a fun trifecta) tells me it’s not the best idea. Also having a puppy realllllllllly made me rethink wanting kids too 😅

[@susieare]

I have three kids and would not dream of getting a puppy until they're much much bigger 😂 No regrets about having kids... don't get me wrong, it's hard sometimes but also incredibly rewarding. ❤

[@brettmartin400]

I have thought I’ve had ADHD for so long but was always afraid of self diagnosing. As of last week my therapist diagnosed me with ADHD and it felt like bricks getting lifted off my shoulders. I was so frustrated living my life feeling like an outsider, and working my brain until it exhausted itself. Finding this video made me feel heard and understood. Thank you so much for the content you post, it helps so so much.

[@lindalyons3223]

Thank you so much for your videos!I was "officially' diagnosed at 47, with two years of sobriety. Oh...did my life, and choices, make sense!! My psych wanted me to take Adderall, I was hesitant and I am now unable due to a-fib. That said, no medication. I suspect my mother knew I had it at an early age. I remember going to Children's Hospital and getting testing done. I clearly remember the hearing test but nothing else. I'd guess I wasn't great at listening and she thought it was my hearing and I couldn't sit still LOL! I used to ask myself why my mother would give me a cup of coffee and 2 pieces of toast in the morning. I'd drink it but really put my toast in it. Anyway, it 'clicked' recently along with some comments. My grounding used to be music. Oh I'd love a good set of headphones and some day dreaming. I forgot all about the music until recently. I also use brown noise to help concentrate. My day is much better when I have a quiet moment or two in the morning before work. And a lot of this is recent due to ADHD kicking up due to menopause -oh the joy LOL

[@kmcq692]

My grounding used to be music too. Best gift ever was noise canceling headphones from my smart boyfriend.