5 Life Lessons i learned the hard way.

[@dianaot6716]

In the words of the great Elizabeth Winkler: “I’d rather be a bad person than keep a gratitude journal”

[@santisanti8386]

😂

[@macabelik]

Hugh Grant energy 😜

[@Caroline_Winkler]

i feel like a misery journal might be right up her alley

[@dianaot6716]

Just FYI this was on my dating app bio and I still landed a boyfriend 😂

[@Riververchi]

@@Caroline_Winkler I think it's a great idea. And also: please stop deleting my comments.

[@hannahkenny502]

“Life is the cruelest teacher, it gives you the test first, the lesson second”

[@kimberlyf4888]

Except in this case.

[@Laura-g1c1l]

Wow, who's quote is that?

[@Caroline_Winkler]

wooooowwwwww. i love this

[@hannahkenny502]

@@Laura-g1c1l it’s paraphrased by Daymond John, original quote was Oscar Wilde

[@Laura-g1c1l]

@@hannahkenny502 Thank you:) Good to know. Excellent quote.

[@essendossev362]

Random pivotal life path story: when I first moved to Montreal, I was struggling to find a job, especially not in my field (math). But I decided that with all my free unemployed time, I wanted to finally pick up playing the violin now, as an adult. And I volunteered for a coop delivering food to elderly by bike. The coop sometimes hosted a farmers market, and they heard that I played violin, and invited me to busk there. That's where I met this older gentleman who was a retired admin for a local university. Who then introduced me to what would eventually be my masters supervisor. Who then set me up with her industry connections during my masters to do an internship. And that internship led to me being offered a full-time position. So that, kids, is how you get a job.

[@CDias-bh3qu]

What an amazing story! Thank u for sharing❤

[@BluVelvt]

Wow

[@trkvskya]

That’s a great story. Hope, I will settle in Montreal soon. I work online so I feel somewhat lonely. Would you please recommend some weekend activities, community centres or something where there’s a chance to meet new people Thank you!

[@essendossev362]

@@trkvskya congrats on the move! I've moved away as of a couple of years ago, but I'm still very fond of the city. 1) People's Potato at Concordia is a volunteer cafeteria that makes meals from donated ingredients - and despite being on a university campus, it's open to everyone, you don't have to be a student to participate. You get a meal out of it, and often even enough to bring some home for later, so bring some extra tupperwares! 2) Santropol Roulant, 111 Roy Est (which is different from Santropol the RESTAURANT a few blocks away, fyi, a common confusion) is the center I was talking about in my story. You can get involved with cooking food for the elderly, gardening (either on their rooftop, or their farm off-island), or with delivery (which can be done either just on foot or by bike - and they can provide a bike to use if you need one!) They also have a bike coop around back known as SantroVelo (I used to run the Women, Trans & Femme days for a few years, and a friend of mine has taken up the mantle since I've moved out of the city). 3) A couple more bike coops to rattle off while I'm at it: Right To Move (Concordia, and what I would describe as the heart of the bike coop movement in Montreal) and Mile End Bike Garage (the anarchist bike garage). Between these three, you'll get a pretty wide variety of flavours, so likely one of them will suit you! 4) And for a fun activity, bouldering at Shakti! Best bouldering gym in Montreal by far IMO. There others in town, but they don't hold a candle to it. Other important advice: Quebec has a long history of political consciousness, of citizen engagement. There were the student protests of 2012, which I'd attribute a large part to why Quebec has the cheapest tuition by far in all of Canada ($300 a semester instead of $3000). People got pepper sprayed and beaten by the police for it, so remember to show your respects to those who fought "les luttes" for everyone's rights. There was also a long history of people doing lease transfers as a form of rent control, but sadly they are no more as of last year (you can still try for them, but landlords can reject them without any reason) - you would see 3 bedroom apartments which had been lease transferred continuously over 10 years with rents like $750 even in this day and age (that's for the WHOLE apartment, not per room), as compared to the $1200-$1800 that's otherwise more common. You can also reject rent increases, even now. When we all collectively exercise our rights, we help keep Montreal affordable for all. Also, get the library cards! There are two library systems in Montreal: Bibliotheques Montreal, which is a whole system of libraries across the entire city (you can pick up from any one and drop off in other ones, and have books within the system delivered to your most convenient point), and BAnQ which is actually a provincial library system, which again, can get you books delivered from further out in the province. What's more, both of these cards are connected to Libby, so you can access books free and online through the app. Between the two of them, with maxing out my holds, I always have some book on the go.

[@PrairieDawnC]

TLDR: Find time to do what you love and a career may find you.

[@sarahogborn8024]

Your first point really made me think of a quote from Rilke: “Let everything happen to you. Beauty and terror. Just keep going. No feeling is final.”

[@Caroline_Winkler]

no feeling is final!! i have been repeating this recently. it's pretty amazing

[@josepha133]

Rilke also said to live the questions instead of the answers. I always think of that when battling uncertainty.

[@lal2911]

"May all things be exactly as they are." From A Course in Miracles. Goes to radical acceptance, I suppose, but also thinking it disrupts the resistance that's makes pain more painful without invalidating the existence of the pain like blunt-force affirmations sometimes do. And just shifting this small bit can also reinforce that this too shall pass.

[@debralugar7235]

Guess what. I will be 70 in March and watch you all the time. You lighten my day immensely! Yes, in my 20's I was struggling to find my place...to raise a child after a divorce...to have time for the man I married for life...to attend college while working. It was hard and I don't think I am the only one who felt that too. I've survived cancer, the long illnesses and deaths of family members and best friends, etc. My spouse of 45 years passed 2 years ago and flatly devastated me, but I have worked through it, sold a house, moved across a state, bought a new house and, I have to say, I wouldn't want to do my 20's again (except I'd like to look like I did in my 20's). Sometimes people get to feeling that they are the ONLY person who has had troubles, misery, deaths, etc. Well, that's just life. It's all about the attitude. The 20's are when most of us are struggling to land on a lily pad, not a cow pile (as my Mom used to always say). You go girl!

[@sydneyhazel33]

"I thought I was dyslexic, but it turns out I'm just dumb." I felt that 🤣

[@Caroline_Winkler]

we sally forth.

[@jenniferroy6288]

We all have our strengths-school smarts pale in comparison to @CarolineWinkler smarts!!

[@jillianchristjansen4912]

I laughed out loud and paused the video to come here and comment that 😂😂😂😂😂😂

[@teressajd]

@@Caroline_Winklermy kiddo had to go to the eye doctor and we found out that adhd sometimes causes eyes to skip words or lines when you’re reading and can mimic dyslexia! So you might not be dyslexic OR dumb it might just be an extra adhd thing

[@kerrifromtheblock]

I actually just paused the video to comment that the period rant and men getting pregnant bit was just everything 👏🏼😄

[@Caroline_Winkler]

it's all i want.

[@annikaParnda]

100% agree! I'm 24 now and over the past few years I've dropped most of my filters for period talks. If you can't handle that, you're not someone I wanna be around. But I've found that most people I'm in contact with are completely fine with all the period talk 🩸

[@mgooding8]

The “not just can get pregnant- they have to worry about it all the time” is sooo good

[@TheMissBeki]

What a world it would be.

[@WindriderLirian]

Okay, I just wanna recommend a book-The Left Hand of Darkness by Ursula K. LeGuin. It’s sci-fi, and the world has one regular-human-dude on a planet where everyone is gender-neutral most of the time, but once a month all have fertile periods where they can be EITHER sex, depending on environmental factors. Very cool thought experiment. And that’d just the SETTING, it’s mostly a subplot.

[@Melissa84]

Caroline is a friend in my head, like I just dropped by and we chatted for a couple hours while she cleaned and we talked about our periods and men.

[@Caroline_Winkler]

i love this

[@KateJessicaSINK]

With the new camera its almost like we are sitting on the couch watching her take down the tree x

[@sheenatalks8529]

Yes I couldn't agree more ❤

[@alicerowe4097]

The best part is you don't have to contribute to the discussion

[@nasimpt]

I feel the same!

[@tonyamiller8418]

Hope Craigs of all ages were listening. Good video.

[@satisfyinggift1013]

😂

[@nakitanash]

@@satisfyinggift1013 Haha

[@HK4seven]

"I'm not asking you to EAT it." OMG I DIED LAUGHING. You're the best, Caroline!

[@mksyoutube_4]

Caroline is a mix of your best friend, a Ted talker, and your favorite professor

[@adriaba790]

Perfectly said

[@fairybreadiscool]

"People keep asking me if I had ADHD." *Immediately starts talking about Christmas decorations before answering the question*

[@amylashley1496]

😂😂😂 THIS!!! I was 90% sure she was a fellow ADHD’er. Love her.

[@JustMe-fo4ev]

lol I feel I'd never need to ask, but nothing wrong with that

[@margoslucter1382]

I'm a little old lady but I love that you are talking about your period. And you're putting all the Craig's in there place!!! Love love love your videos.

[@gabisyska9384]

Keep the candles up. Keep anything that is winter vibe and not Christmas related. Keeps me going through January and February. I switched my Christmas lights on the balcony to warm white lights. I kept some evergreen. I keep the incense log cabin. I kept the miniature snowshoes. I kept the photo print of a real Barbie in a knit sweater hands up giving zero fucks in the snowscape. I decided to embrace winter like the Nordic people. My winters have been good ever since.

[@brenda4523]

I agree totally. The Nordic people can really teach us about living life in the best possible way!

[@runemagged21]

Same here! I'm in Vermont and we keep the greenery & lights! Even the pops of red bows or berries are fun for Valentine's day. Certainly the plaid 🤌

[@Caroline_Winkler]

This sounds incredible. I think I will ❤

[@LawnOrnament]

All of my holiday decorations are basically just winter themed. I don’t take them down until i don’t feel sad about winter anymore lolol! The tree is still up and i don’t have plans to take it down yet at all🤣🤣

[@DaSexeB_a_PartOme]

​@@Caroline_Winkler❤❤❤❤

[@quinniemac]

Please continue including those "lets do chores together" sections in your videos. I was sitting on the couch dreading how annoying it will be tomorrow to deal with a messy kitchen and instead i got up and just cleaned all the dishes. What a relief! Thanks for the body doubling! And great video! 🥰💜💕

[@bobthemailman1]

Same!!

[@nonanonanona789]

Whenever she brings out the pointer you know it’s gonna be an amazing video.

[@danitiwa]

It took me way too long to realize that’s not a whip

[@therealJamieJoy]

@@danitiwa it's not a riding crop??

[@joy-joy8675]

I am 75. You are wise in this subject. Thank you for giving life stages a sense of normalcy! Good Job!!

[@lisarobbinson8835]

I'm 54 and I think she's amazing!

[@mountaingarden8823]

@@lisarobbinson8835me too!

[@kimberlyf4888]

@@lisarobbinson8835 I'm 55 and just watched this with my 14 year old. Love Caroline.

[@janelte]

Almost 60 and ditto

[@Caroline_Winkler]

i'm so glad you liked it!! im sure you have ten fold wisdom of your own to share

[@jaredt.murphy8257]

I don't have a period, but I'm sure if men had them, we would NEVER stop talking about them, and the undergarment industry would be built around it. Cudos to you for speaking your truth. I never want to come off as the sort of guy who does "performative" feminism, but I'm never not in shock at how illogical and WEIRD it is to shame half of the human race for basic bodily functions, which are both deeply painful, and responsible for the survival of our species. For all the bs ceremonies and traditions we have, you would think there would be a reverence, or at bare minimum deep respect for those who bear this burden. Anyway. Thank you for sharing, your videos are always so great to see. (I need to listen to your podcast)

[@Caroline_Winkler]

an incredibly lovely comment to read! thank you for sharing it! i will say that all the great men i admire in my life have always been extremely considerate when it comes to menstrual business. it's funny how great it feels just to receive that kind of care and consideration. it goes a long way!

[@RCGWho]

We're not victims. Don't kiss up to feminists.

[@lyndseygolden7546]

There was… and then there was colonialism.

[@peztopher7297]

@@lyndseygolden7546 I believe you mean" there was reverence, and then..." I just wanted to clarify because it's an important point you raise. (If that is indeed what you mean.)

[@kimgraham8571]

@@jaredt.murphy8257 let me praise you for this! And remind everyone that once that non sense is over the terror of menopause comes along and changes everything again. And for many of us, not in the best way!

[@erica8645]

Not being the go-between might actually be the most underrated life advice.. ever. Nothing immediately implicates you in a conflict quite like being a liaison. When the issue inevitably isn't resolved, you are already sitting in the scape-goat throne awaiting coronation

[@Laura-g1c1l]

Excellent comment!

[@MeloniousThunk]

Yes, indeed. I also learned this one the hard way in my 20’s. If you find you have this tendency, it’s worth asking yourself why and what you hope to get out of it and explore that. Some might call it codependent behavior and they’d be right in many cases, but people pleasing is not exclusively the domain of codependents. Importantly, though, there is a problem with boundaries in nearly every triangulation situation that’s worth examining. I like what Brené Brown says about having solid boundaries as a condition of trust in relationships. Her book Braving talks all about this, and the other conditions for trust. Worth a read!

[@Caroline_Winkler]

yeah this one rocked my world because it was such a big part of my identity for awhile, and i genuinely thought it was "helpful". and intentions from all involved are usually good, but it still has slapped me hard in the face wayyyyy too many times. your last sentence sums it up sooo well

[@Becky-pu5js]

That last sentence is so poetic i love it

[@shaynap8613]

As someone who had this whole "liaison for the good of others" thing blow up in their face this summer that was so good to hear that as a concise lesson.

[@Lo-tq5xf]

Just a “little bit of ADHD” is the most ADHD-person answer ever. From, a fellow ADHD.

[@Caroline_Winkler]

haha could be 😆i just feel like i know many people who are soooo much further on the beautiful ADHD spectrum and it really inhibits their life in certain areas - and medication or other accommodations are really useful for them! i dont necessarily experience that intensity, so i just mean to say that i dont feel like i *suffer* from it as much as some people very much do

[@veronicadee]

@@Caroline_Winkler your vlogs have helped me get through a life-changing breakup these past few months ❤ needed to tell you. Your vids are so heartfelt, fun and wonderful. Because you responded to adhd I thought I’d share too that my breakup has been concurrent with an ADHD diagnosis and a ton of learning about rejection sensitivity. I feel like your advice and perspective on attachment and breakups has been a really helpful complement to the RSD learnin. I too was dubious that I had ‘much’ adhd after my assessment and going on meds showed me just how much adhd I actually have 😅

[@bellabellabelladonna]

@@Caroline_WinklerI felt like that too but the meds were a game changer for me, and I didn’t expect it!!

[@EASTHASS]

@@bellabellabelladonna Yes, me too!! Until I started meds, I hadn't realized how much ADHD had ruled my life before: the constant overthinking and replaying situations in my mind, the way I was held captive by the hyperfocus/burnout cycle, the crushing overwhelm that mysteriously appeared when I least expected it, and on and on. Meds were absolutely life-changing.

[@francescam.6999]

​@@Caroline_Winkler I still struggle with the idea that I have adhd. I am in my thierties and just found out. Knowing that you have adhd helps me a lot.

[@SaraLanvin]

Whenever there's a Caroline video, all my depression goes away.

[@HappyHarryX5]

May your depression fade away this year and you find joy and purpose in life again. Take care of you. From a fellow sufferer. ❤

[@chocolupinek]

Absolutely, I feel the same way. Hope you are better soon

[@laurienix4121]

agreeed!

[@Moshm4n]

Same.

[@Caroline_Winkler]

gotta hug you for this one. i hate that you're in that place. and i hope that place isn't the last place for you! remember to call a friend today :) they want to hear from you

[@HappyHarryX5]

My biggest life lesson was: “I love him, BUT DOES HE LOVE ME???” Learning what a narcissist is changed my life…46yrs too late. People pleasing is the most destructive thing parents teach us and force us to do with our siblings. ❤

[@satisfyinggift1013]

Facts👏🏼

[@caroline-brisbane8577]

Yep 👏

[@drebugsita]

PREAAAACH! Currently almost no contact with my narcissistic mom who still tries to guilt me into being a ppl pleaser on the regular, nvm me recently revealing that it is so dangerous it conditioned me to become experience DV.

[@HappyHarryX5]

@ I’m so glad you’ve gone no contact. My Mum isn’t a narc but a people pleaser who wanted me to always trauma bond to my narc sister and set me up for always being trauma bonded and blind to red flags with my ex-husband narcissist. Mainly constant emotional abuse but he liked to walk up to the line. I wish you all the best in this next chapter of your life and remember they only pick on the very best people. Take care of you. I’ve changed my complete name and dropped off the radar when it comes to my kids, family and old friends. I’m working on myself now.

[@malyndanovember1595]

YOUR “I wish all the men had babies “ Christmas carol was steaming out of nowhere into my headphones while I was bumming about having to carry my senior pup down our stairs for a freezing cold night walk… I literally busted out laughing … thank you so so much for sharing your ever candid truth on periods and just truly shifting my spirit in a tough moment. Craig can suck it. 😅

[@infiniteunbound111]

Caroline is a national treasure!

[@lizzieholland7051]

international*

[@elwood393]

Yes!!!! Also, excellent representation for all the ADHD babes out there (like me)! ❤

[@santisanti8386]

Her apartment is a world heritage site!

[@peztopher7297]

My twenties were my happiest and most carefree. That was forty years ago. I think it's harder for young people now. I think it's harder for everyone nowadays. But when you're young, you should feel hopeful, like anything is possible, not insecure. I loved your rant about men and female body issues. That was radical, actually radical.

[@isabelle.9]

Your absolute unhinged and unapologetic giddiness about your new vlogging camera that tracks you as you move is fantastic! I totally feel your elation!

[@coconut922]

how is it possible to like Caroline more and MORE after every video she posts? like my heart is going to explode.

[@nschilling3]

Exactly!!

[@lilymay7171]

Yeah, I’m not the fan girl type, but find it increasingly difficult not to be, with Caroline. Sharing her perspectives are a life resource as important as any I’ve encountered.

[@coconut922]

@@lilymay7171same !!

[@mimiandthemuse]

My reflexion on a life lesson: Im 68. A boyfriend told me once:" What if this was the best time of our lives? What if it never gets better than this? " He wasn't too far off. I find myself thinking about it often now. Live. Just live. Don't hold your breath or leave something until later.

[@juliagoolia72]

I keep what I call my Rage journal. Separate from my normal journal, it’s where I put all of my rage and angst and existential musings that have no place bumming out my every day posts. It’s changed my game. Everyone has those days where they think they will d@@ alone, never be loved, never be valuable, etc. you have to get those thoughts out of your head!

[@amandawells1567]

This is my favorite video!!! The unhinged part in the kitchen about periods and wanting men to have to worry about getting pregnant gave me LIFE!!! I was laughing so hard and also saying YES !! SAME! Hahahaha and there were definitely some Craig’s just freaking out in their moms basement 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@nschilling3]

OMG, yes!!

[@nancychestnut8928]

Oh yeah. If men got pregnant everything would be so different. Think about it.

[@HappyHarryX5]

Life lesson: No more one sided relationships of any sort. If they don’t want to get to know me, they’re missing out. I’ll still be polite and ask them about themselves with follow up questions and that’s the only thing I can control.

[@SteffieEsti]

Valuing yourself is important ❤

[@grandy_rho]

I ended my last relationship because they couldn't answer the question, what do you find interesting about me? That was two years ago and nobody has deserved me since ❤

[@HappyHarryX5]

@ My ex narcissist could tell me everything he hated about me but not one thing he liked (when asked). May you keep being your awesome self and shine. I hope someone wonderful comes along for you. I still find it weird and funny that there may be someone fantastic out there for me.

[@carolynrifkin3488]

New subscriber that’s also a therapist, I’m a huge fan of your videos. They are so homey and welcoming AND inviting folks to really helpful therapeutic ideas. Life lesson #3 is GOLD.

[@eddents]

I was fortunate to have 3 older sisters growing up and was familiar with monthly cycles. As a man, when a woman I was dating started bleeding during the night while sleeping over, it was no big deal. I supported that same woman through two births, perimenopause, menopause and resulting bone density issues due to hormonal imbalances. We (men) are basically wimps comparatively to what pain and discomfort women must contend with in just "being". Then there's the overall medical gaslighting in women's health they have to deal with. Keep educating and keeping it real Caroline! Justin, hope you're looking back decades from now knowing forging a life long relationship with Caroline was a brilliant move!

[@judith3939]

I am 63 years old and loved, loved your lesson on life’s tests for when you’re in your 20s. Just about everything you said particularly resonated with me. Even thought my 20s were a long time ago I remember all of these trials and tribulations and feeling so alone, as if I were some kind of dysfunctional person reacting/feeling the way I did. Amazing job you did today in addressing that.

[@giselleswan4559]

The last lesson is soooo true. I learned it the hard way this past year in the fall. My personal info got hacked and I got a call from a “verified number” saying my personal info was being used to take out credit on my name. The person was urging me to act quickly otherwise I would get into more trouble and my losses would be greater the more time passed. And so i even though i felt the red flag I didn’t pause to think or seek advice from my parents or friends if what was happening was legit. Instead I acted right away and got scammed 20k… so yea before you do anything or say anything. Take a minute, breathe, and think it over.

[@nancychestnut8928]

When in doubt ask them for their phone number so you can call them back when you get home. They always hang up. Be VRRY careful. Urgency is a big give away.

[@super_ted_7371]

"I'm not asking you to eat it" 😂😂😂😂

[@Soylentology]

I got to this comment before this part of the video. I just spat my smoothie out all over myself.

[@Moshm4n]

I died 💀

[@mountaingarden8823]

Laughed so hard!

[@zenfuldancer]

😂😂😂

[@Caroline_Winkler]

one ask at a time, boys. we can get to that later.

[@modelno2004]

In college, I noted an audition for a student film project coming up, didn’t take it too seriously. Woke up that morning, it was raining, gross, cold…didn’t really want to put on clothes, much less makeup. Forced myself to get presentable and go the audition, because it was my last semester, and I needed a distraction. I met my husband that day, 17 years ago.

[@LawnOrnament]

I love that!

[@The5caroline5]

Couldn't agree more with Lesson # 4 Caroline! Many of us are choosing the comfort of working from home these days, and yet some of my most important professional opportunities came from random encounters I made with people who happened to be in the office the same day as me and a conversation was sparked. Don't underestimate the power of serendipity in life; but you have to leave your home for that to happen.

[@janewarren4759]

Thank you for this, great work. A friend once told me "This will pass" it either gets better or sometimes worse but it wont stay the same. I always think of that when I have an "angst" moment. Your talk reminded me of her, I will add your "you don't have enough data" which is good advice for youngsters.

[@HannahRainbow88]

I like how Stephen Fry said that moods are "like the weather" 😊 I also still - nearing 20years later - have a fortune cookie paper stuck onto my mirror, that says: "Time and nature are the greatest healers"

[@jenniferturner9320]

Misery journal, yes. And also make a personal resume of your biggest achievements so that when you’re ready to believe in yourself again, you have some bullet points showing that you’re worthy and competent and a valuable asset. One of mine was receiving a standing ovation for a dance piece I choreographed in college. So they can be small and not professional. Just a time when you were proud of yourself ❤

[@satisfyinggift1013]

What an amazing idea @jenn👏🏼🙏🏽; I'm totally borrowing😊.

[@user-jo7xn5hf6b]

yes! You literally just have to collect the data that you don't have :)

[@amylashley1496]

“World peace & pregnant men” 😂😂😂 Preach 🙌 Love, love, loveeee every one of your KZbin videos Caroline & the podcast with Jess! Please talk more about your ADHD…as a fellow recently diagnosed 30 something year old woman, it would be great to hear your thoughts/feelings on it 🫶🏼

[@mkk_K92]

Definitely getting so addicted to your videos now!! thank you for just being a companion and being there whenever I need someone :) I always feel like your videos keep me company!

[@jillianchristjansen4912]

She's the perfect body-double bestie 🥰

[@kaychisholm3544]

You had me so worried for 5min and 36seconds. Sitting on the edge of my seat, but clenched, pearls clutched. I was praying you knew it was a stain and that you knew it had to shed. Way to get me hooked into the video Caroline!!!

[@user-kw3wm3gz4g]

I think I really needed to hear the liaison point right now. I'm currently 6 months pregnant, feeling stressed with work and having house renovations go wrong but have been stuck in a back and forth between family members where I am being asked to relay messages or ask people to call one another because I'm the only one who picks up. I've definitely fallen into it in the same way you describe, where there is an expectation that I am the most reliable/giving with my time/best communicator. In the end, all it's really achieved is that I'm exhausted.

[@saram3156]

I find that acting as a liason is a real ego trap. It can make you feel important and well liked and included, but it's usually if not always better to stay out of it for the reasons you mention at 22:52 Getting a third person involved in a conflict is sometimes called "triangulating." It's a good concept to learn about.

[@emiliachristiansen9080]

As a former family problems mitigator, I show my support. Whatever you're trying to solve won't be solved by you loving your fam. You just end up being exhuasted.

[@CarrieLovesLife.]

I’m glad you spoke up. While she was talking I realized how lucky I am that my family doesn’t do this. It feels like a very unhealthy dynamic. I have had friends put me in this situation before, it only ruins friendships.

[@MallouMakeup]

The new camera is very cool, but it’s giving me motion sickness in less then 30 secondes. I love your videos such much that I just turned my screen around and listened to the rest. Loved the rant on men and pregnancy!

[@m1ndyourmanners]

I love the camera moving about while you’re putting stuff away. It feels like I’m in the room with you, staring you down without blinking

[@Caroline_Winkler]

hahah

[@zapmama27]

I was getting anxiety when your lipstain was purple, I was getting ready to yell at you in the comments and then you wiped it off and calmed my soul :) ADHD is a superpower for creative, adventurous people who LOVE learning new things. It's not a disability , it's such a strength...from one ADHD sister to another. Thanks for your transparency, its beautiful and refreshing!!

[@JordynLagoe]

These videos make me RISE out of my grave.

[@vor-und-nachname]

Love that. 🧟

[@coscorrodrift]

Love the comment section on caroline's videos. They're my kind of dramatic LOL

[@Caroline_Winkler]

ugh you know i love a nook

[@tmaguey]

​@@Caroline_Winkler Hahaa! And it's the perfect nook to write in a misery journal.

[@ezgikeskin5934]

25:24 I'm carrying you Caroline around with me whenever i change rooms while listening & watching you as i do my morning chores. You are like the cute candle 🪔

[@zzzzojka]

In my not very early 20s I suddenly encountered not being beaten, threatened to be killed, criticised, belittled or gaslit, so it was the happiest time ever, but also very different from what I knew. It was the opposite of loosing support or loosing childhood or whatever, I was just born at 23 and happy to stupidly navigate life as someone with zero adequate survival skills but a bunch of "adult" battle experience, lol. I wish I had that light in me still.

[@evelynpeavy]

Men can’t get pregnant because they wouldn’t take care of their babies.😊

[@Ann-KathrinElser]

Love your comment!!! ❤

[@lily29997]

You still do! You’ll find it:)

[@sharonoddlyenough]

Mine came back to me at 43, it can come back!

[@pdxgirl17honeybees]

💖🫂

[@thalia9797]

I did psychotherapy and NLP. The misery journal is so IMPORTANT and a GREAT idea! My teacher said, "You need to mourn your losses as many times as you count your blessings". So, at night, you go through and feel the losses you had during the day. For example, My food got burned, my train was delayed, my manager got mad, I fell from my bike, my result at work was not as I hoped, etc etc. Feel sad and sorry that that happened. Then feel the gratitude you feel in life for things that happened.... You need to mourn your losses to feel good and happy in life. Big or small

[@RawkVocalGangrel]

Thank you for providing so much perspective and fostering so much joy. I truly appreciate the effort you put into sharing your insights and perspectives. Your ability to provide thoughtful reflections not only enhances our understanding but also creates a joyful atmosphere that is uplifting for everyone involved. Thank you for fostering such positivity and clarity in your conversations with us as parasocial as it may sound I truly, truly look forward to all your videos like checking in on a dear friend.

[@wenjing68]

I love this video!!! So many life pearls! Caroline, you’ve put out so many videos with such insightful life lessons, and it’s amazing that you continue finding more to speak about. And somehow you make everything so fun! I first found your videos almost 3 years now. I mostly find Vlog-style videos to be boring, and yours is the only channel I watch religiously. I am on the edge of my seat to watch each new video you make. I love it all; life lessons, life updates, interior design, shopping, decorating, your sister’s book, your bro’s vases, etc. Most of all, thank you for being a kind, caring person, speaking up about important things, and helping make the world a better place! 💜

[@joyfulsquirrel]

Period talk 👏👏👏 thank you for being so fierce in this video, there is nothing wrong with our bodies as they function. Also, so glad you hopped on the underwear wagon, it's honestly so much better. I've been using fabric pads and underwear for over 15 years and I've never felt better. I love goat union for theirs!

[@MelanieJaramillo-v8l]

How is Caroline the queen of saying the things that are so true to the core about bad thoughts we all have and how little it has to do with our reality.

[@HeartDrivenTarot]

Brilliant idea- a misery journal can help release all the angst! Great advice all around and you gave me much needed comic relief on a difficult day...

[@shayram89]

If being a liason for someone's communication was a good thing, the phrase, "don't shoot the messanger" wouldn't exist.

[@nellaperricci4750]

Tanti Auguri a voi due! You are incredible. Even when you feel tired or unsure, know this: you are everything your baby needs. Words have a frequency, and the love in your voice is something your baby can feel deeply, even if they don’t understand the words yet. Your words have power-they comfort, nurture, and create a bond that grows stronger every day. Trust yourself, Mama. The love you pour out is felt, the strength you embody is seen, and the care you give is enough. You were made for this, and your baby already feels the beauty of your heart.❤

[@marybond6026]

As a middle child I agreed with everything you said about the liaison. One time a family member told me I was like the glue of the family and at the time I took it as a huge compliment. Now, I am beginning to see that it actually has harmed me in many ways, and has caused me to try to help, often in vain, and get hurt at my own expense. Thanks Caroline, you're so awesome and I did my chores with you

[@cashmeresque]

thank you for sharing these life lessons ❤️ i’m turning 27 this week and your videos/podcast episodes have helped me navigate my 20s in so many ways. i’m so happy i found your channel - came for the interior design, stayed for the honest life advice and kookiness! :) you’re like the big sister i never had!

[@MichaelJenkins-i7w]

This video reminded me of something I read recently. Have you ever heard of 'The Irresistible Seduction Formula' by Olivia Simmons? That book is so transformative, it's a life changer.

[@josie9306]

Scam

[@meteorrejector]

caroline your videos have gotten me through a breakup and i am truly so grateful for your presence and hard work. the part about opportunities really resonates with me today!!

[@kayingthao5072]

I feel so seen seeing your Christmas tree still up in January. Being fired from my job for the first time in my early 30’s was the best thing ever happened to me. It forced me to moved on to better things.

[@Caroline_Winkler]

amazing. i love that so much. very happy for you

[@Mar-ME-s3h]

You are such a joy to watch 🌸. You have a wonderful gift that makes a person want to watch your videos regardless of the subject matter. You make everything interesting with your sharp insight, intelligence, and charm. You are so genuine and entertaining ⭐️

[@mallorygraf8574]

I'm in my 60s and you are right, Caroline! The 20s are so hard, esp if you have friends who seem to get everything they reach for so yes, you feel like the only loser. But it does get better, and life does have a way of evening things out. For instance, my life became more balanced in my mid 30s and on thank gawd!!! The lesson in life is that some people have it easier in the early years of their lives, and some people have it easier later in life! Love your content, Caroline!❤❤

[@LunaLynnLovegood]

The face tracking does feel a little like I'm the camera interface in a futuristic home... just like, following/watching everything. Slightly disorienting lol, but I'm glad you are enjoying the new tech. Great video as always!

[@Caroline_Winkler]

haha yeah im not sure i've found the best use for it yet. but maybe like when im out thrifting or something??

[@LunaLynnLovegood]

​@@Caroline_Winkler(feel free to ignore). I feel like it would also work well as an "alternate shot" camera if you had a regular camera going at the same time. Like catching the big movements, but keeping the steady shot for if you're in the same general area. I like the thrifting idea too. Seems like it would be beneficial for if you don't want to spend too much time setting up / framing up a shot. ❤

[@LunaLynnLovegood]

As a side note, the running around as it was following - genuinely hilarious and made me laugh

[@yellowsheeeep]

wake up bestieesss, caroline winkler just uploaded a new edutainment vid 💕✨

[@tmaguey]

😂 "edutainment vid" ❤❤

[@endur5nce]

I'm in my 50's loving your channel & yess girl, I remember in my 20's always talking with my future husband, why is this so hard, how are we ever gonna do that, and feeling so overwhelmed and discouraged

[@kcwojan]

Sitting here taking mental notes about trying those period underwear because they do sound convenient...and yet again remembering I just had a whole ass hysterectomy a few months ago. I wonder how long I'll keep expecting a period. Another life lesson: things you thought would change the trajectory of your entire life and be the worst thing you ever had to go through...will more often than you think become things you fully forget about while watching a KZbin video after not too much time at all. I regard this as a great thing about life! Edit: In no way want to minimize anyone else's experiences with this type of surgery. I never planned to have children and it was an excellent decision for my overall health. Recovery wasn't a piece of cake but I did it. We can do hard things. And then ADHD can make us forget about them sometimes lol

[@gwenwade6059]

Ghost periods.

[@kcwojan]

@@gwenwade6059 bloody spooky!

[@sheilavanduynfote5539]

I’m always late to the video, BUT I LOVED THIS ONE. Thank you for sharing your point of view on life changes, I am 74 year old grandma and totally love love all your videos. This video definitely was spot on life stages and your humor made me smile the whole time I watched you. One of my favorite is if you date a man that has an aversion to you having a period “ Dump him Dawg”😂😂😂😂❤❤❤❤

[@Kitanaii]

The 4th advice actually happened that way for me! I met a friend through bumble, and didn't think much of it, thought just met someone nice who I vibe with. A year later she needed someone to help with her small business, which led to me being hired by her for a year, helping me save money.

[@Caroline_Winkler]

love love love this story

[@samirataubmann]

Thank you so much for this. I‘ve been really struggling with my impatience, putting so much pressure on myself, how urgent everything feels. Yet when looking back on my life, things that had time to heal, develop or build slowly are now my biggest strengths. So thank you for your reminder ❤️

[@CynthiaMiller-cc3qj]

Your advice is so REAL!! I have 3 grandkids, all in their mid-twenties and so much here is so relevant to to them. I’m going to insist they watch this video! I thought I would die laughing when you brought up the subject of men having babies and men being weird about women’s periods. I have always wished men could get pregnant!! They deserve it! Love love love you ❣️❤️❤️

[@Le_Broccoli]

Been following for a while. Love your content! The moment the adhd question came up, I knew the answer lol. But you telling a side story about the stockings as you take them down and then proceed to put them back was all the confirmation we needed. Also you’re very funny ✨ wish you the best

[@peggyjones3282]

My daughter just turned 12. She hasn't yet, but her friends are all starting their periods. It's an exciting and scary time for little girls. She was telling my mom all about it, my dad was there too. He was a little startled that she talked about it next to him. 😂 My mom said i should probably talk to her about appropriate times to discuss menstruation. I am debating what, if anything, I will say. I really appreciate that the world is getting less and less ridiculous about a basic bodily function. My dad will be okay. He raised 5 daughters. 😂❤

[@Clovergirl7934]

Oh lord, you are so right about data! Life is just one long lesson and until you have experiences that allow you to look back on, then you realize you lived through it and I’m still ok! Time just prepares you for those hurdles in life to know it’s just another step in the journey.

[@tilanakruger]

I’m nearly 40 and I love your channel, I think you would be surprised how wide the age range of your audience is.

[@ST-rj8iu]

#4 and #5 is so true. When you don't have expectations of people, they become more open to helping you.

[@micki8822]

I’m 67 years old & I love watching and listening to you. You’re fucking hilarious and you have your shit together so watch out for the rabbit holes.

[@booklover2.0G]

I learn something new from every single one of your videos Caroline, this time you reminded me that I need to stop trying to control things and just let them happen. You just took a weight off my shoulders and I thank you :)

[@ari88elle]

Quick notes versions for those like myself that cannot remember anything that's not written down (bless the ADHD): Lesson 1: Life feels hard in your 20s because you don't have any data yet Lesson 2: If an adult man is weirded out by your period, dump him Lesson 3: Acting as a liason is almost always a bad idea Lesson 4: The most pivotal connections can come from the randomest moments Lesson 5: Urgency os often a fallacy. Slow down.

[@jadewalker6458]

Omg the part about being the go between person, especially in a family dynamic- I feel exactly the same way. I am also extremely family oriented and would do anything to make my family happy (yes I am a people pleaser lol). I had to work for a while in therapy about setting boundaries and allowing other people to have emotions / manage their own conflicts. Being the middle person between my parents and sibling never worked out, even when I thought it was helping. Good on you for seeing that too - I didn’t notice the negative effects of trying to fix their problems myself until after a year or so of therapy? As a late-twenties woman with ADHD and a similar mindset as you, thank you for speaking up and sharing your truths!! It always helps me feel less alone :) ♥️

[@ArtBlockDotNet]

That purple lip color is gorgeous ❤🙌

[@HannahRainbow88]

I think I still have a similar lipstick from the end of the 90s lol

[@elizabethclark8374]

Hi Caroline, You really have the correct idea about going through the things that ALL people experience. You are also correct about the “problem” of not having enough data in your life ( in your 20’s). That is so true! You are wise beyond your years!!! I am so glad that you and Justin are doing well! I am happy for both of you. Happy new year ( belatedly). Elizabeth

[@tinar1405]

Absolutely - my twenties were the worst. But I made it .... and just started my fifties 😬😊

[@racheldy97]

The liaison thing is very relatable, I'm trying to learn how to face my fear of saying "no" but it's definitely extra challenging to do so when it comes to family. Trying to learn how to create healthy boundaries and protect my peace while retaining softness/gentleness. On a side note, I've been watching your videos over the past few months and I find them so uplifting and inspiring- I look forward to every upload. Thank you for your authenticity and creativity and for making me feel hopeful and at peace even on some of my dreariest days :)

[@IzuAurora]

I'm so happy for your new camera but sadly I'm so sensitive to motion sickness that I can't watch that part :') Obviously selfishly I hope you don't use the tracking so I can continue watching your more vlog-y videos but if you're really enjoying that then I hope you have a lot of fun with it ! 🥰😊 Thank you for the life lessons though, I'm still listening to the rest of the video even if I can't have the amazing visuals haha

[@user-jo7xn5hf6b]

same 😢

[@squigglz97]

Same here 😭

[@katharinaclasen]

How is this possible? I needed this video exactly in this moment. It couldn't have come at a better time. It is like you say exactly the things that my reasonable self would say right now but can't, because it is clouded by emotions... Thank you Caroline ❤

[@maneatingsalmon]

Pipe down, Craig!

[@nonistrange3302]

Love the clever new camera. No more scenes with talking but no talking head. Regarding being a liaison, it can certainly backfire. When I was a young mother and nursing my newborn, I (and my friend Fina) joined the La Leche League which encourages mothers to breast-feed their babies. The leader of the group called on us all to donate milk to 2 newborn twins that were having terrible trouble with formula. When she visited the home and saw that the twins were laying on the sofa, she decided that they were in danger of rolling off and getting hurt. She asked me to mention this to Fina who was the sister-in-law. I agreed to relay the message, but afterwards regreted it. It cast a chill on our friendship that lasted for years. Nobody appreciates having someone infer that your family is incapable of responsible parenting. Fortunately our husbands and sons are still very good friends. Sadly, Fina has passed away. And I am forever sad to have been involved in this disaster.

[@eschrad]

Girl… all my Christmas decor is still up. The HOA allows up to a month after the recognized holiday (for outdoor decor) and I’m milking it for all it’s worth. Indoors, I pressed a button each of my lighted garlands to change from colored to white lights and now it’s festive “winter decor”. 😉

[@everystitchaprayer6268]

Yes about the tree! I always want to start the new year with Christmas "put to bed" but not this year. And I had the exact same thought about more lighting. Loved hanging out with you. Thank you!

[@potsnpaninis]

I’m reading a book called ‘The Defining Decade: Why Your 20s Matter- And How To Make The Most of Them’ and it’s filled with so much good advice about working, dating and more! And by reading, I mean I’m listening to the audiobook on Spotify :p. Just thought I’d put another resource I’ve found helpful for surviving my twenties lately out into the ether 😊

[@sodotta]

haha i already keep a little life instructions manual/life journal, and the misery journal is a perfect instalment within it, thank you so much. what a way to make you feel less lost, ashamed, alienated and all sorts. fantastik

[@kimgraham8571]

Great advice. Almost wished you were 50 to advise us of some of these issues, but how to handle them at a later stage in life. ❤️🙏🏼

[@Caroline_Winkler]

that is so kind to say. and haha i kind of wish that too - i am aware that there is so much life that i have yet to experience and i do look forward to learning some of the wisdoms of people much experienced than me. thanks for being so sweet

[@kimgraham8571]

@ you are a multi generational treasure. I love how real you are and you have helped me change around my entire house! Haha. It’s been fun. And by the time you’re 50 you will be making TED talks and be speaking on a large stage ❤️

[@pushindaisies5327]

The funny, calming, joyful, deep thinkery, common sense, abrupt, chaotic good of your videos is my favourite thing these days.

[@jengirl2]

“I’m not asking you to eat it.” Hahaha…preach, girl!

[@thezenstitcher]

I am 63 years old and I found your 5 lessons spot on! You have so much wisdom and as I was watching I wished I had this KZbin episode to watch when I was younger! Thank you! Not only are you wise but you are also very funny and I could help but break out in laughter several times. BTW - there is a great book called The Defining Decade: Why Your Twenties Matter - And How to Make the Most of Them Now by Meg Jay. She describes a concept of 'weak ties' or loose connections that can lead to opportunities we would not know about. I read this book last year and absolutely loved it. It has such great advice and guidance for younger people. Thanks again and I look forward to your next episode! PS - the period rant - EPIC!