Scrupulosity: When Piety Becomes an Affliction ❤️

[@boxesonwheels]

I had this thought cross my mind when it comes to prayers, “I’m not asking you to stop breathing, I’m asking you to stop hyperventilating”.

[@kylegomon8709]

Thank you for speaking out and defending the faith, Chris. Well said. It is not the Church that abuses. It is a small percentage of Priests abusing their power. Abuse will happen where there is power. It has happened in protestant faiths as well. Like you said, it is human failing. I am not afraid to say I was abused. But I knew, even at a young age, it was not the church that did it. My faith in the Catholic Church has never been stronger. As Peter asked Jesus, "Lord, to whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life."

[@terridekett8366]

Well said regarding the abuse of children and the Catholic church.

[@joshualopez9175]

Wow, that intro was amazing. May God have mercy on us all

[@sandracecile8652]

Thank you for speaking out. We need more Catholics to do this.

[@pam-powerful-purpose]

Thank you for speaking out! 🙏

[@marybethrosko2535]

Thank you for this. I was literally crying while watching this I have struggled with this off and on for quite some time. Time to change the playing field. Also, thank you Chris for addressing the anti priest commenters.

[@RealLifeCatholic]

Praise God. Truth sets us free! He loves you so much.

[@ivorybow]

I went through a period of scrupulosity, as identified to me by my priest, and the spiritual work I did revealed to me I had confused and blended God with my abusive and neglectful father, whom I could never please, never be good enough for, nor could I ever gain his approval. His main attitude toward me was disappointment and embarrassment. Naturally I internalized that, and sadly got confused hi with my heavenly Father. After a few years of deep work, I separated them.. I finally forgave my father, coming to understand he was a WWII vet, with those wounds, and had suffered under a cold, harsh and unloving mother and father. I am now at peace, and trust my Lord to love me. Now I see his loving hand daily. He died for me, how could he be disappointed in me? I am over scrupulosity.

[@andreanease4215]

Wow. I haven’t listened to this talk yet, but I’m also working on childhood trauma healing and this is a profound comment I will have to meditate on for myself.

[@1RLamberty]

So wonderful how God works. I was unable to rest peacefully last night because I often over analyze everything I saw or actions I take or dont take. I was intrigued when I saw this Video this Morning - I had no idea thats what it meant. This is what I have been struggling with and it has a name. I needed to hear this, sit with this and Pray with this today. Thanks Be to God! Thank you for all you are doing. God Bless you ❤

[@Joshakazam20]

Pastor Mark Dejesus is an excellent resource for those who struggle with scrupulously and various forms of OCD. I couldn’t recommend him enough. Having struggled with OCD himself, his videos mention the 7 distortions with OCD such as Perfectionism, Uncertainty, Difficulty with Emotions, Interpretation of intrusive thoughts, etc. He also talks about getting to the heart of the struggles (mother wounds like nurture and father wounds like approval and affirmation) and much of it is how you give and receive love from God, others, and yourself. He also talks a lot about the Grace of God working in all of this. Only if we had more Catholics who are like Pastor Mark (Protestant). I definitely wish I have heard of more Catholic resources like this one sooner.

[@taken4granted612]

The point that scrupulosity covers over anger as a psychological protective mechanism for a relationship (in this case with God) was a stunning point. I’ve seen in my own scrupulosity a hidden anger, but also a genuine love of God growing at the same time. The more you open yourself up and allow God to reveal Himself to you, the easier it is to reconcile that just because an emotion like anger is brewing in your heart, it doesn’t mean it’s right to be there

[@reginakuhl2085]

Great response in defense of our wonderful priests and our Catholic faith!

[@tavostacos]

Thank you so much for this interview. It allowed me to look inside myself and be able to find some true underlying reasons for my scruples. Great work, thank you!

[@MollyShowalter-v2f]

So helpful! Relieves worry.

[@bethhivley2633]

GOOD FOR YOU CHRIS!! My sweet brother in Christ! Thank you ❤for

[@CatholicBaseball8]

One of the best talks about scrupulosity, next to St Alphonsus. It's really neat that Scrupulosity deals with anger.

[@kimberlysmiley316]

Ah, that is the best response to the abuse scandal that I have heard!!!! I wish more priests would say this but I am so glad you did!!!!!!!!!

[@janetrodgers4197]

I just read the book by Fr. Marc Foley, The Context of Holiness which delves into the life of St. Thérèse from a psychological basis. She was afflicted by scrupulousity and I realized I am also somewhat affected by the feeling of not being forgiven (even after confession and deep sorrowful prayer) which is similar if not a specific aspect. Thanks for the video! ❤❤❤

[@InteriorIntegration4Catholics]

That's the best psychobiography of a saint I have ever read. I really like Abbot Foley's work.

[@BrianFischer-yn6oz]

Father Chad Ripperger said in one of his videos, that his answer to people who suffer from scrupulosity is to tell them you’re just not very important. That takes the focus off of themselves and onto their faith where it should be!

[@taken4granted612]

Turning from self is good advice, but this video addresses a pretty obvious blockade to that approach alone - that a scrupulous persons view of God is so warped that the focus they put on God is of a distorted image of Him and it will accelerate scrupulosity. To put your focus on faith, there should be a reconciliation of how you view God, otherwise the faith life is infiltrated by obsessive compulsions rather than authentic spiritual inquiry.

[@taken4granted612]

@@heathera2874 I think part of this is just a potential confusion from OP. If I recall correctly, in his talk Fr Ripperger didn’t say that his approach to scrupulous people was to tell them directly they aren’t that important and that’s it, but instead that they need to focus less on introspection of whether they’ve offended God by a sin etc, and to put more pure time in pure contemplation of Him for His sake with the trust that if you lived a holy life like that, God Himself would guide you if were in a state of sin instead of you having to figure it out yourself. I don’t think everyone will agree with Fr Ripperger or his belief that scrupulosity is a sin against charity, but if we were to synthesise some of his good points with this video, it would be that it’s important to step away from yourself in how you approach God, because when you have a distorted view of God or are in a frenzy for if you’ve sinned, taking yourself and your spiritual state out of the equation for a bit might give some healthy breathing room to learn who God is and love Him for His own sake

[@Xpistophoros]

This is hard for me dealing with OCD with SI. Just being told stuff hasn’t worked for me. I notice that when I don’t do my comfort things I bug out wicked, same goes for praying rosaries and whatever else I feel like “ope, didn’t pray my rosary today, I should kill myself” hard to get out of it

[@DENISEGirolamo-qw2xk]

If it's a case of OCD, I HAVE BOTH. I WOULD FIND YOUR REMARL THOUGHTLESS AND CRUEL!

[@businessacc179]

👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻 that intro 🙌🏻🙌🏻🙌🏻

[@bethdulin5382]

Thanks for the intro. I know we had problems, not a denier of it BUT there is the opposite side of it. I had the BEST childhood Priest. I'm 60 now and just drove 2 hours each way to take him to dinner this week. There are amazing, wonderful Priests and my heart breaks for these good men that have to endure the burden of what the world believes about them.

[@angelamria]

Wow!!! Thank you for addressing those lost souls that have no understanding or direction in life, much less seek or live the Truth of the Catholic Faith. May God bring them clarity. May God bring them Home! May they come to be the greatest advocates of the One True, Holy Catholic and Apostolic Church.

[@LetsCoffeeBreak]

Chris, thank you for defending Holy Mother Church with respect to childhood sexual abuse AND for not skirting from the issue acting as if nothing occurred. I speak about this topic any chance I get except that my sexual abuse was not by any priest or member of the Church but by family members, neighbors, and friends. Even while in the seminary, never did I see or experience abuse of any kind (grant it I never made it past my postulancy). Forgiveness is key. It does not excuse what occurred, but it is a start. It was a start for me. I forgave my abusers many years ago and I ran "back" to the Church in 2017, because despite my brokenness, I knew that is where I needed to be. The only suggestion I might offer to the Church is not to go overboard in the other direction. Sexual abuse is NOT a homosexual thing. It is a person thing and not all persons are same sex attracted. And if the they are, and there has never been a history of sexual anything, that person should not be denied an opportunity to serve God in religious life. Teach what you know. Practice what you preach. Reach out to others is what I am doing today because of my experiences, and charity, mercy, love, and forgiveness are at the top of that list. Keep up the great work. You rock my faith.

[@taken4granted612]

The double standard for the church and teachers is definitely something that’s been on my mind - thanks for calling it out The core of this double standard seems to be the desire to remove the paternal authority of priests in people’s life.

[@xqp5503]

Agree with all of your points of views! Since the moment I tell someone I am Catholic, that is the comment that they always come with, and the answer you did here, it’s the one I always have. Thank you Chris🙌🏼🙏

[@TheWingate07]

Chris, you and your guesy are such a blessing to all of us. Thank you for all you do!!

[@BlueBelleBlooming]

louder, chris!!! i love the authenticity and plain speech. i love you for that, brother. with God's mercy and grace, let us make the catholic church stronger! in it for Jesus! 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼

[@beschulz0709]

I am currently struggling with this seemingly all of the sudden. I was a Protestant and will be joining the Catholic Church in December. I was not particularly scrupulous until learning of mortal sin and the consequence of losing my salvation constantly. I don't know how much of this is misunderstanding and wiring from my upbringing, but only now am I feeling a little bit like I think Martin Luther must have when he constantly felt like nothing was good enough. This struggle has begun to consume me to the point that what was something I was excited for (joining the church) has become a source of fear and anxiety.

[@andreadasilva8988]

Thank you Chris and Dr. Peter! Interior Integration/Sould and Hearts!👍 As a Catholic counsellor, I too have seen how some practitioners might claim to not impose their values yet act otherwise. This is tragic. I would just like to say that not all of us practice in this way.

[@kt5137]

The cure for Scrupulosity: Read Psalms over and over again.

[@xqp5503]

Well said Chris👏👏👏 Thank you🙌🏼🙏

[@johncino3309]

Good one guys, thank you! Chris, thanks for speaking the truth at the start as well.

[@philmilan8784]

Awesome response Chris. It's a human problem which has to be addressed and taken care of. Well spoken. God Bless. 😀

[@lisafrongillo9083]

First, thank you Chris for calling out the people who speak out against Catholicism without knowing ANYTHING about it. The Judas example…Right! On! And last but not least…excellent interview. Our faith is first and foremost about the…here comes the phrase we Catholics grimace at…Personal Relationship we have with Jesus. To understand how much you are unconditionally loved by the Father and the Son and why you were created, is to understand your imperfections. We are all created equal. And that’s ok.

[@posse79]

Tell it Chris! Thanks for calling out the ignorance and bigotry on some of these comments.

[@lenoragrimaud182]

Thank you Chris and Dr. Peter. Love your joy, Chris.

[@angierafferty2476]

Thank you for your excellent response to the comments you have received regarding priests.

[@jonijohnson2516]

Thank you for addressing the accusations, and the illogical reasons people use to hate priests and Catholics.

[@HarryDelBuono]

Thank you Chris for providing the truth!

[@allenwoolstencroft3891]

Go Chris keep up the awesome calling bro

[@joyt.8779]

Loved the straight out the gate lecture! nail on the head!!!!

[@MargaritaSierra-w2t]

OMG! I'm so happy to turn on this insightful, educational video. This is what we've needed to be educated with. Thank you for sharing this knowledge. I'm happy we're learning so much with these videos. What's happening in life it's not just catholic priests. All the clarity when it comes to anyone that's in charge of our children. Many thanks and blessings to you and all that work at sending us these videos. Grateful that I'm able to watch this vitally important information. Again, thank you.

[@kathymccaseski7677]

Thank you Chris, I believe like you do about the sexual abuse by priests. We are blessed to have the Catholic faith for over 2000 years, and I will never leave the Catholic Church based on the sins of others. Jesus is way bigger than all the sins, yes, even bigger than those committed by clergy. Jesus has already won the battle over sin, and I am grateful every moment of gift and grace we have been given. We were instructed to pray for our enemies, and for those who have fallen away from God. You live that with your ministry, which again is a blessing of gift and Grace. Thank you and your family for showing us how to live in the love of God, in these modern days. I will never forget that Pope John Paul said something to the effect "morality does not change with the times.

[@johnnichols2088]

Hopefully a hope giving comment here: the development of scrupulosity is pretty simple and likewise has a simple remedy. It’s always the same story. In my case, I had a genuinely psychopathic father (anti-social, pathological liar, terrible with finances, wasted his life on trivial things like women, career, reckless and dangerous activities until he married at 50). Since he was a surgeon at one point you can imagine how high his standards were for us kids. Talking to him was less like walking on eggshells and more like balancing on a single nail. I certainly had suppressed anger (wasn’t allowed to express any growing up because he was “Godly and perfect”). Once I left the toxic, abusive home and went out into the world, I found that normal people are not like that and half of my scrupulosity dissipated within a year. The Lord called me, as it were, to adoration at one point and now after 2 years of it I feel genuine love for the Lord and His love for me. That said, it took a LONG, long time and was torturous beyond what can be described. My guess is that those who struggle with scrupulosity are to see it as a cross and a vehicle for advancing in holiness. There is hope for all of you.

[@roxanne8447]

So good❤❤❤

[@CatsHeartbeat]

Agree with you Chris - sexual abuse is found everywhere, in all corners of life - these people gravitate to jobs that give them easy access to children, but it's also rife in families and neighbourhoods - that "trusted" relative, or family friend, or neighbour, or even in the families of your friends. And these predators are now using social media to prey on the children.

[@jeremyschmaltz7039]

Chris, I work as a mental health therapist at an agency and see the abuse you speak of nearly every day. Thank you for boldly defending the faith and calling out the bigotry of those trying to pigeonhole the Catholic Church into being portrayed as an institution that is contrary to its mission. Very often I find that the angriest of those who lash out are the ones who are hurting most and the only way they know how to validate that pain is by pointing a finger at a larger institution because no one has walked alongside them yet and taken them through the fire that leads to healing. I'm not defending bigotry...I don't play nice with evil. But for many, blaming is easier than healing, and sadly for many, that's where they will chose to remain. And that's where we need to pray for conversion. Continue living the creed, continue being bold, and continue being Catholic, Chris. The world is a better place since you began this mission you set out on decades ago. God bless you, your family, and your ministry.

[@DebWokson]

I loved this podcast. I learned so much. Chris I loved what you said at the beginning of the podcast about Catholic priest. You were right on. Needed to be said. God bless you. Send me more great podcast. I think you represent our faith wonderfully. I have been listening to you for awhile. Love your topics. Keep up the great work. Let's Glorify God.

[@pierscolieri993]

Bravo Chris for speaking up. I stand in solidarity with you.

[@cedbrothers8916]

Hey Chris ! I appreciate the content of this video and have found it helpful towards my OCD - I think it would be helpful if you treated the topic with more tenderness speaking to the woundedness of the scrupulous position rather than speaking as though they are doing something wrong

[@Graymars1]

Chris-Such a GREAT response to the trolls. I wish that I could articulate that as well as you do. Thank you for being who you are and keep it up!

[@rosebartlett6882]

Awesome chat...much needed!!!!

[@paularamos4238]

😍 I so agree with your response and thank you for setting the record straight.

[@bikecameraaction3334]

Very well said, Chris! 👏

[@misschris6801]

❤Thank you!

[@johnmarch8249]

Was able to watch the intro - keep up the great work - thank you for strengthening the rest of us in the process.

[@celiabuttigieg411]

A relative suffered/suffers with scrupulosity, a priest told him not to go to confession and basically didn't object to him leaving the practice of his faith. And that is exactly what has happened, so he has been left with an absolute terror of hell but nothing to buffer against that tremendous fear. He will not hear anything about the church anymore. It is now a forbidden topic. This has impacted everything in his life.

[@taragrace8723]

Prayers for your loved one

[@celiabuttigieg411]

@@taragrace8723 Thank you and much appreciated

[@celiabuttigieg411]

@@heathera2874 Thank you

[@LydiaTheBusinessWoman]

I understand, although no one has told my son not to go to church, he has done this himself and his fear of hell is now torturous for him. We cannot mention God's love at home because he goes mental

[@chelsiecasey2387]

As someone who struggles with this, it's not that I do not want to be in union with God. I absolutely do! What often happens with me is that I will have such closeness and then will go through a period of not feeling that closeness and then taking that as a rejection. I assume that rejection is due to something I've done, that I have offended God in some way. This is rooted in shame. That I am not good enough (and we're not!). I forget in my desperation to regain closeness that it is not my works that ever caused God to love me. I get trapped in this hamster wheel of trying to be perfect, trying to find the right path and where I went wrong, and then I do actually give up. I have been through this same cycle at least a handful of times. I have become better able to recognize it, but I still worry that I will get stuck in the same pattern again.

[@PhilAlumb]

Trying to be Perfect--which is Impossible--creates Scrupulosity. Someone can literally drive themselves into neuroticism.

[@shanebarnett126]

I agree! Jesus said to be perfect, as our heavenly Father is perfect, but this was only after He said "love those who persecute you". We can be perfect if we love as Jesus did "Father forgive them, for they know not what they do"

[@Renee_N]

Grow up in a household where everything you do is wrong and if you equate God the Father to your parents who you are to revere and honor...there you go..a God you can never please just like the parents you grew up with. Parenting sets the stage for so much in dealing with authority figures your entire life. Including God the ultimate authority.

[@joans7538]

Would you put in the comments the podcast name and episodes he mentioned about perfectionism and scrupulosity?

[@clairenecaise802]

It's interior interrogation episodes 86 and 87

[@cozyhomemakingvibes]

Amen amen.

[@LydiaTheBusinessWoman]

My son was taking steps towards ordination in the CofE church. In December he had a mental breakdown. At first I couldn't understand what was going on, he was talking about his Christian faith in a way that wasn't recognisable to me and my faith. I said he'd made up his own religion, his god wasn't my God, the God of the bible. He thought he'd not obeyed God's direction to witness to people on three separate occasions, combining this with the person at church having to cancel his meeting with him to discuss his ordination turned him completely, what I can only describe as mental. He said 'God left him and he 'felt' the Holy Spirit drain from him and now his heart is hardened'. So he believes God has given him over to satan and he's going to hell. It's a terrifying, traumatic thing to see and for him to go through. But, until he says he agrees to what he's got (he's refusing to agree he has ocd/scrupulosity) it's impossible humanly to get him well. But with God all things are possible 🤲 I've found him a counsellor, but he won't see him to start his recovery. Meanwhile we're witnessing him blaspheming, tearing up his bible, swearing, punching his own head, saying Gods trapped him - yes there's alot of anger and hatred towards God, the God my husband, daughter and I love. Its unbelievable there is such a thing, but it's TRUE!

[@marthakwiecinski5914]

I've never labeled myself with OCD or scrupulosity, but I have always been hard on myself and now wonder if one of those, or both, is what I struggle with. Even without having to "just get through" my daily rituals, I have this image of God that is not what our Faith teaches. What should be the first thing to do?

[@arv1233]

❤❤❤

[@susanad.o.156]

💯

[@carld3218]

It used to get to me that, through human eyes, no matter how many good things I do, in God's Eyes, I always fall short of the mark. When Jesus says that the path to destruction is wide and the path to Heaven is narrow, along with the testimonies of Saints who say that they saw 50000 souls die at once, and only a handful made it to Heaven/Purgatory, it can really get to you that in the end, your good might not be good enough.

[@cameronstanley2713]

I definitely have anger at God for allowing me to be fearful with my OCD my scrupulousity You don’t think OCD is chemical imbalance?

[@cozyhomemakingvibes]

🙏🏻♥️

[@jagon1jgonzalez]

I’m more upset about the treatment of the victims after they came out. Amendments is more than a apology

[@lishkoburger12]

16:06 ...BRO

[@skyspring7704]

2:25 Louder for the people in the back.

[@helooo1]

Its a condition caused by a childhood abuse physically, and emotionally by The parents, I know that because that’s me 😢

[@MrKrakonos001]

Strict father figure often causes scrupulosity in his children...

[@monicamartinez2781]

Imitation of Christ will do wonders for scrupulosity!! I know this first hand.

[@deanmarion5477]

Hey Chris, scrupulosity is all about is the scientific researchers who wanted to know our faith with too much science but we use little of science but too much of science of single nuance.

[@vickijohnson3768]

Chris please don't talk over your guest or even more than you let your guest speak

[@bethhivley2633]

Seriously? Since when did you reach such a level of sanctity that you could go telling people what to do and judge people don’t you know that you’re going to be judged for even the smallest of things? Like you’ve never talked over anybody. Get a life.

[@hiltonchapman4844]

I thank Jesus Christ, my Saviour and Lord, for establishing His Church just for my spiritual benefit, for my salvation (which is His prerogative). And all the scandals - just proof that this is THE true Church. The devil is against GOD (= Jesus Christ). HC-JAIPUR (11/May/2024) .