Trump Will 'Definitely' Declare A National Emergency, 'Probably'

The President confirmed on Thursday that he will likely potentially certainly improbably possibly doubtfully absolutely declare a national emergency. For sure, maybe.
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The Late Show with Stephen Colbert is the premier late night talk show on CBS, airing at 11:35pm EST, streaming online via CBS All Access, and delivered to the International Space Station on a USB drive taped to a weather balloon. Every night, viewers can expect: Comedy, humor, funny moments, witty interviews, celebrities, famous people, movie stars, bits, humorous celebrities doing bits, funny celebs, big group photos of every star from Hollywood, even the reclusive ones, plus also jokes.

[@NewMessage]

I knew it. He's finally standing on the lawn, shaking his fist at 'crazy young people'.

[@Lucius1958]

*"Get Off Your Lawn, Whippersnappers!"*

[@not_enoughmana]

And clouds.

[@cisco8650]

Reminds of the the "old man yells at cloud" Simpsons' meme.

[@janedodd8291]

It takes a crazy to know a crazy

[@boughtbot2639]

Hahahaha

[@abhiwankenobi7172]

"I didn't rant..." *Continues to rant for 2 more minutes*

[@optimisticwhovian1726]

Yeh this is the same man who says everyone loves him then sulks as soon as the media don't report positive things about him. The guy's ego is as fragile as China Porcelain.

[@russellcampbell9198]

Love it. It's peachy dory.

[@jackisears367]

Him NOT getting his way is NOT a "National Emergency "!

[@promiseemeka2135]

What if Mexico decides to build stairs on their side of the wall?

[@ktbon231]

Funny, but ingenious.

[@alisaortiz1905]

They should

[@analicona157]

Never thought of it, they really could!!!

[@AnimeChaos10]

Stairs what are stairs...? Oh they take you up? WRONG! Elevators do. Your fake news! :P

[@richardwhite688]

Fucking great question. Let's hope Fox News thinks of it, or sees your comment and talks about it on the news. That will worry tRump. Hahahahaha.

[@andrewjohnson6716]

When he says "lawyers tell me" or "people tell me" or "I looked into and" these are all code for he's saying whatever is popping into his head right at that moment.

[@penguin12902]

Or: "I heard it on Fox and Friends" and I believed it!

[@NewMessage]

i'm all for Impeachy-dory.

[@jayzenitram9621]

Impeachy Donny

[@hrm087]

New Message I’m thinking impeaching and voting in Dory

[@Galactic_fart_sniffer]

@Octavius Chan wall isnt gonna do shit.

[@raes306]

Lol..👏👏👏

[@DrOrtmeyer]

Oh my God 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@skybasesolutions-patchmap4813]

Why doesn't everyone just start congratulating him on getting the Mexicans to pay for the wall. He won't know the difference and too narcissistic to ask questions.

[@laman012]

Get grandpa back in the dementia clinic.

[@maryrosekent8223]

laman012 Amen to that.

[@mdudegamer]

I'm still incensed at that reporter who brought up the possibility of declaring a national emergency. Not as incensed as I am at those Fox News people who nagged Trump into shutting down the government by insisting it'd be cowardly to do otherwise, but still pretty ticked.

[@christopherbland5774]

The reporter Must be the new Commander in chief better than Hannity or Ingram

[@faceoff3315]

*Make America great again Impeach Donald J Trump and Mike Pence from Office*

[@topsypart2880]

Yes a two fer

[@kimberlys8422]

Kill it with fire. I mean them.

[@Rayber5901]

This is a problem. Mike Pence is a hard core neo Nazi. He even looks like one. He is a hard core racist with a long history . He is very smart. The hard core RICH WHITE RIGHT support him. Trump is a bumbling idiot. He's screwed so many people but money and the power of money protects him. Pence is a snake. He scares me. MONEY pays for all of this. Take the money away. Do away with Citizen united. Don't let corporation buy our leaders. Punish those who try. Punish those who take the money. MEGA fines, not just little slap on the wrist fines. Get a $1000 illegally.. fine them a million. Jail is a joke. FInes .MEGA fines Millions of dollars to Medicare , social security.. universal health care .. F them if you agree [e-mail].. if not so what..

[@BeeWhistler]

George Lewis I'll settle for making America just okay again.

[@arx3516]

@@Rayber5901 just make lobbyng a criminal offence like in all other democratic countries.

[@bom_basti_sch]

OMG it hurts when you have to listen to Trump... Only two more years, we feel with you America Greetings from Germany

[@commanderuseless1685]

It really does hurt. Greetings from Sweden (insert ignorant comment about our immigration here)

[@Notadragon621]

Save us :(

[@BG-wh5oc]

😭😭😭 Save us!

[@bulbasaur001]

Thanks for your sympathy.

[@backyardbuck6362]

you mean 6 more years

[@hierwirdnieetwassein]

As a European, I would like to thank every American who elected that clown. Your president is impressively entertaining.

[@sydneyali3463]

Couldn’t agree with with u.

[@sydneyali3463]

More

[@alexanderdouglas1946]

As an American this is hilarious haha

[@madarthivanki]

As an American, I have mixed feelings. It's hilarious but it also makes me hiss,"Whyyyyyyy?!"

[@rotibakr]

Agree

[@solidnem]

This is probably the first time The Late Show has ever uploaded a full video of the monologue instead of cutting it into two or three segments. Good job. Keep that up.

[@NewMessage]

".... a one time payment of 5 to 10 Billion.." Or, they can just shower him in gold. A golden shower, if you will.

[@dontmesswiththelopez]

I'm Mexican, we'll do it for a 6 pack of Coronas.

[@BeeWhistler]

Donut Frump LOLOL!!!

[@tsstevensts]

I dunno, Trump is already that much in debt to Putin, is something you can download free worth ten billion...allegedly. I don't know...allegedly.

[@mannys4539]

@@dontmesswiththelopez LMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[@msmeya5]

😂😂🤣🤣💀💀⚰⚰

[@yaceya]

"I know all the latest technology" says the man that doesn't know how to operate an umbrella.

[@kevinkool3]

HAHAHAHAHAAAAAAA!!!

[@commanderuseless1685]

Obviously that particular piece of high-tech equipment is just too new and nobody fully understands it yet. Walls on the other hand...

[@yaceya]

Commander Useless properties of a wall were thoroughly studied only in the last few years - it was cement, solid and see through.

[@floydfan5993]

@yaceya, or a conference call office phone.

[@ccmarcum]

And don't forget, he ''knows all the words,'' too.

[@maconw35]

This man has lost his mind. Please Mueller stop this madness

[@axirnindar4171]

He literally contradicted himself in the same sentence. "I never said that, and I didn't mean they'd write a check"

[@byLizee]

Axirn Indar he’s insane

[@Kamn_exe]

"During the campaign I said Mexico would pay for it, I never said that." DJWTFT

[@robertrijkers4923]

I have the right to do it.... I may do it...probably I will do it... I would allmost say definately 'do it'..... worst Nike commercial ever

[@Hhelms12]

bahahahaha

[@tatumhalligan9177]

actually me abt exercise

[@henrycampbell9733]

This was a classic one, I couldn't stop laughing 😂😂🤣🤣😅😅

[@jessicamoore5826]

I think through out our Nations History TRUMP will be the only President who said..."I did not throw a tantrum!" "I did not slam the table!" "I should've slammed the table!" End quote...How inspiring to our Nations youth....NOT!

[@thelexicon7294]

"I did not work for Russia!" really puts all previous presidential denials in perspective, doesn't it?

[@Dayman90]

We're only started season 3 of this reality sh*tshow and already I'm waiting for the season finale....

[@sethbritton6970]

I'm wanting to skip and go straight to the final episode- the indictment chain that pulls all of Trumps stupid out of the political sphere, and into the prison complex.

[@kimberlys8422]

_series finale_

[@brandonshaw27]

hahaha

[@vicegt]

We haven even got to the season four twist were Ivanka is carring his child.

[@stevewise1656]

AJK90 sadly you’re right. Don’t know if our country can take two more years of this freak.

[@Gothangelik]

That Caravan dance is EVERYTHING! 🤣❤️

[@spaz1002]

Gothangelik that Caravan song is everything 👍

[@overtime94]

2 CARA! 2 VAN!

[@batintheattic7293]

Does this creature NEVER stop lying?

[@rc4443]

Nope

[@animalia5554]

Do his lips stop moving?

[@primalwerewolf9356]

@@animalia5554 no because he's a reptilian shape shifter

[@unity6906]

No. To stop lying he'd either have to shut up or start telling the truth. Not possible.

[@stanwalkerlover23]

Don’t say that That’s cruel to creature

[@bogdanfutera]

800 000 people without pay _ THAT'S national emergency mr trumpet

[@cjmacq-vg8um]

why don't the dems use this opportunity to impeach that jack ass. now's the PERFECT time! they should also investigate how much trump has invested in these companies contracted to build his unnecessary wall.

[@Tsukuyomi28]

@@cjmacq-vg8um the Senate probably wouldn't be ok with it

[@cjmacq-vg8um]

+Michael... its the house that has the authority to initiate and conduct impeachment proceedings. impeach. if it fails, impeach again. impeach, impeach, impeach. also, file criminal charges on top of the impeachment proceedings. trump is a CRIMINAL! he's not even the legal president. and the only thing I hear from americans is - oh well, can't do nothing about it! that's just crap, inexcusable and criminal in itself! its damned time for americans to STAND the hell UP and demand some ethics in their country!

[@Tsukuyomi28]

@@cjmacq-vg8um yeah I was thinking the Senate did it but they just do the trial afterwards.

[@gayleelliott3319]

c.j. Macq, I've been thinking the same thing--that he may have an eye on the contracts for the wall--created shell companies to procure the contracts (or whatever). That would be like him: profit off the presidency.

[@sw_fit50s]

What happened to the last caravan? This is beyond a joke. This is a smoke screen for individual one as we are all talking about this now instead of his indictment

[@_Muzolf]

Do you mean impeachment? Because i doubt he is afraid of that, considering that you need a senate majority for that to actually do anything.

[@hughjarrse]

@@_Muzolf well we'll have to see what the mood is like once Mr Cohen starts talking, people in power might start distancing themselves

[@Arthiem]

He's not the sharpest hammer in the dishwasher. What I'm saying is it's okay he's not smart. Just that he's in the wrong place and is the wrong tool for the job.

[@RoninZulu]

Arthiem...he's a tool, period.

[@Excalibur-Sonic]

@@RoninZulu He's not the brightest bulb in the shed.

[@crayolacrayon4019]

Lol.... 😅.that comment really fits him.

[@WorldOfARandomVegan]

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣👍

[@Excalibur-Sonic]

@@RoninZulu He's not the sharpest crayon on tree.

[@death_stalker]

I’m A depressed person but Stephen Colbert is a medication of laughter

[@waseemh.a.5291]

Its all good brotha we taking it day by day

[@thomasmcgillivray3997]

laughter or idiosy?

[@betsy1947]

Absolutely! Colbert, John Oliver, Trevor Noah, and Bill Maher! Love them all!

[@pault4004]

@@thomasmcgillivray3997 No idiocy is reserved for any Peon who still supports Trump. I mean f your still in this crimminal's camp you;ve got to have your head so far up your but every time you fart you sneeze. I'd listen to Steve all day and all night. Especially if he was reciting Trumps eulogy.

[@lawrencesmith4960]

@@pault4004 I thought the same same as you until i took my head out of my ass and actually did some research. The first thing was to research and backcheck the validity of these media sources before i listened to them. Why not Wikileaks, for instance, around long before Trump having an impeccable record on the handling of original verified leaked documents? No one has questioned Wikileaks only ignored them. Instead we have this comedy and littany of allegations, seemingly based on little more than anonymous and unnamed source few backcheck.Many seem more concerned with the pimple on Trumps ass than analyzing the entire story. Trump is not an innocent but who is. Do a youtube search - CNN John Bonfield Project Veritas This clearly identified CNN production Supervisor is caught on hidden camera by a sting operation meant to expose the media bias and fake reporting. Here is a summary of what he said: "Our viewers are not too smart. There is nothing to this Russian bullshit because if there was it would have leaked by now. We could never have done to Obama what we are doing to Trump because our viewers didn't want it but for Trump they do. I dont blame Trump for being pissed. Our ratings are incredible right now. Its just good business"

[@berkpick]

Of course the wheel isn't older. Just think about which requires more difficult materials to make. You can make a wall out of sod (dirt and sticks) or unrefined tree branches. You need decent wood, stone, or metal working to get a worthwhile wheel and shelter is a much more pressing need than travel. OF COURSE THE WALL IS OLDER. But more importantly, when something is described as "medieval" it's not being called "old" it's being described as unenlightened and barbaric, which this specific wall idea is. It's not criticizing the aged concept of walls in general, it's calling this specific project stupid. I would insult Trump but then I'd have to write him an explanation of the insult.

[@sep69]

The wheel is older then the wall... My god guys how did you end up with this clown in charge of your country ?

[@411Adidas]

Lots of money exchanged hands and lots of stupid gullible people lol

[@TheTriad001]

I don't know how. I just know that I voted for the third party cabinet.

[@megamanx2293]

Russia, he is just a smoke screen, there are a lot of things that are moving behind the scenes.

[@AnthonyTobyEllenor-pi4jq]

They voted for him, don't you have voting in your country ??

[@sep69]

@@AnthonyTobyEllenor-pi4jq You are replying to a 5 year old comment on yt. You should get out more. There is more to life than reading the comment section of a 5 year video.

[@jamesguidash9296]

._. You know we're in trouble when the seventy-something man in charge of the free world has to argue with reporters as to whether or not he had a temper tantrum.

[@peterpiper7441]

I DIDN'T HAVE A TEMPER TANTRUM!!!!!!

[@batintheattic7293]

Tee hee!

[@JynessaSwann]

@giftofgab247 troll

[@jamesguidash9296]

@giftofgab247 Diiiiiie.

[@akiras.3595]

@giftofgab247 Yeah, sure. They were not the president of the United states tho...

[@LackofEthics]

I will never not enjoy the Colbert twirl

[@rudyjuarez2702]

Well you just did

[@teenygozer]

Yeah, I'm pretty sure Trump ranted, raved, and smashed the table.

[@saveyourself6216]

Unbelievable this guy calls someone out saying that's a lie. Over 7000 lies in 2 years.

[@dt3280]

Michael Kelly is

[@RJLbwb]

It's not just he lies, he lies about such petty and pointless things. "They can't fly in,.. obviously" WTF?

[@Katzztar]

Trump claims he doesn't throw tantrums? We got it many, many times on TV.

[@aldenheterodyne2833]

I don't throw tantrums! I'm not bald! I don't use golden retriever pubes as a toupee! I'm naturally this orange, my mom just ate a lot of carrots when she was pregnant with me. I don't have tiny hands! I mean, my penis is 'uge! The biggest you've ever seen! It's a whole inch and a half long! Have you ever seen a penis as big as a Pinky? Did you know that most penises are the size of a human thumbnail? Also, that tape where I confessed to sexual assault (grab em by the pussy) was all jokes! I can't go to jail, I didn't collide with Russia, and I am definitely not gay for Putin, and I 100% did not send Putin a video of me with some prostitutes so that he would come ravish me in my hotel room, why are we talking about Putin? It's all fake news! You are all frauds for recording my words and playing them back in context so that the words that come out of my screeching asshole of a mouth sound really damning. FAKE NEWS MAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGAAAAAAAA!

[@brakesforsnakes757]

@@aldenheterodyne2833 golden retriever pubes? I like where your head's at.

[@CloudsGirl7]

Throwing a tantrum over how he threw a tantrum. The most unruly baby would look at him, take the pacifier out of their mouth, and say "you're good." Then proceed to vomit on him.

[@cheungcampbell1780]

Asura Heterodyne Golden Retriever pubes😂😂😂😂😂😂👏👏👏👏😆😆😆

[@JunHijam]

A crazy person never thinks himself as a crazy person

[@stevenpatrickmilton1248]

Let's just talk about the band and that dischordant version of caravan they pulled off beautifully

[@_JayRamsey_]

"PRES. TRUMP: I DON'T HAVE TEMPER TANTRUMS." I never thought I'd see lower thirds like that in my lifetime. Methinks he doth protest too much.

[@Neukids]

It's like Dumb and Dumber, with only 1 character

[@rockybu7218]

Well Trump is one character and his followers are the other character

[@dawnmidnightsun2521]

Nah current trump and campaign trump are two separate characters, at least according to him since "I never said ..." And then we see a clip or a section of a letter where he did in fact say ...

[@grandwonder5858]

Crooked Trump claimed to be the smartest tech person but yet he doesn't even know how to use the speaker function on a phone! He claimed to more knowledgeable than all the generals combined but all he does is give Putin blowjobs!

[@edwardwilliams3452]

Me, myself and Irene.

[@mikevanlingen6541]

No, it's the sequel---Dumbest.

[@thandie67]

Almost 3 years in I am still asking how Trump happened.

[@jeanne8507]

Thandi M - It may feel like 3 years, but it’s “only” been 2 years. God help us.

[@f8ofk8]

Putin knows.

[@marshwetland3808]

Read Gwynne Dyer's analysis - populist strategy, appealing to the dumbest, loudest, most simplistic people. People who can't even perceive the narcissism, sociopathy, and dementia here.

[@AL-eg9rb]

U 2 Thandi M? I shake my head in disbelief every time I hear him talk or be on TV.

[@ALphaMach1ne]

Conservatives. They hate fairness, safety and logic. That’s how

[@1rcproductions]

It is sad that Trump makes himself and everyone that voted for him look like a fool. Very sad times for the USA.

[@thomasmcgillivray3997]

It's probably because most of them are.

[@couragekarnga8735]

Personally, I think the people who voted for him are fools as it is. They knew what they were signing up for.

[@MrJpags]

Even sadder is that none of his supporters will agree with you 🤣

[@JimVito]

@@couragekarnga8735 we have so many fools that its made me lose hope for the future. As sad as that is.

[@tonymagona334]

There is a very small, and disappointing side of me, that wanted Trump to become President because I knew nothing would go right, and so when everything started to go to shit I could look at those who voted for him and give them a big "I told you so" look. It was knowing Trump would be a failure that I wanted him to win, so all those who voted for him would realize how much of an idiot they were for doing so.

[@marylynne9104]

“His mouth continued to do words”. My coffee is all over me, my desk, and the wall opposite. I can’t breathe. 🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣

[@4um360]

“I am the calmest person there has ever been. Believe me; no one is as calm as me.”

[@agiie615]

I keep reading these comments in Trumps accent 😂😂

[@misslanapford9169]

Poor America.. I just want to give you a big hug and say it will be Ok. I feel sooooo sorry for all those people who foolishly believe the blatant lies that he tells and then subsequently gets caught doing so. Especially when it's recorded proof...

[@marofontaine5307]

Thank you for the love,Lana😘

[@misslanapford9169]

@@marofontaine5307 Thank you for your reply.. it's not easy to watch sometimes.. the man is in his 70s and behaves like he has no common sense, either that or he just don't care that is actually on record and constantly having to correct him. Telling you just lied....

[@eversomellow2538]

Obviously you arent aware of the lies of shummer, pelosi, the clintons(i could go on)

[@misslanapford9169]

@@eversomellow2538 U seriously telling me there worse than trump. He's the President of the United States.. The whole entire planet can see the way he behaves..

[@chrissiek8706]

@@eversomellow2538 please, GO on!

[@KevinSmith-qn8fn]

Dear Lord if you impeach Trump i promise i will be good to everyone for the rest of my life Amen

[@forkfork1]

Impeaching him is easy enough....getting a conviction (67 votes) is nearly impossible

[@malaikashoaib9920]

I will go to church the way I did when I was young if that happens.AMEN

[@danwolfe3703]

If you live

[@sarasrinivasan2753]

If you impeach him, you have to deal with "mother" pence as the president, you really, really want that?

[@sillygoose635]

@GENERAL PULLER shut up

[@alissapurplebunnies5955]

This had me laughing. So glad this show has a youtube channel! This is so funny😂

[@kbbeats3099]

Anybody else start laughing hysterically at the caravan bit?

[@ishaschdv1]

NorthernLightsOG meeee!! Missed it

[@kbbeats3099]

@@ishaschdv1 saaame

[@barbarac9805]

I wish the media and the people around Trump would just start laughing at him when he starts spouting that utter nonsense. He needs to know we don't buy his lies for one minute. Right now, he thinks he's so cool because people listen to him while he talks absolutely crazy!

[@alx-cc9gl]

He even introduced it with: 'Here's the story'. Like he just made it up at an impromptu comedy event.

[@msmeya5]

I love his caravan dance!

[@adoxartist1258]

My college freshman daughter just watched this. She, like the rest of us, is dumbfounded, sputtering about what could possibly be wrong with Trump, then takes a deep breath and declares in astonished frustration, "The man is a MEME!"

[@chrissiek8706]

And not very original meme either 🙄

[@ZaxorVonSkyler]

He's getting senile!

[@newyorkpotioncastle]

Tell her Trump is funding CCS tech that fights climate change, that he signed a bill for it last year. This man is a hero!

[@aegontargaryen4758]

Adox Artist tell her to embrace trump he is making America great again.

[@ZaxorVonSkyler]

@@aegontargaryen4758 how? By playing golf and eating cheeseburgers all day while thosands of people are not getting paid because he wants his stupid wall???

[@gottathinkupanewone]

Trump slammed the table and walked out of his divorce negotiations, too -- just before Ivana got it all.

[@TheBoxingCannabyte]

Watching Trump supporters try and defend this nonsense has become a comedy routine.

[@floridaflyfishing3457]

The real crisis is that 1 in 5 of our fellow Americans cannot afford the prescription drugs they need another crisis is that 78% of Americans are living paycheck to paycheck and almost half don't have $400 in savings if they had an emergency.

[@brainflash1]

78% living paycheck to paycheck seems a little high if only half don't have $400 in savings.

[@PaleGhost69]

@@brainflash1 you can be living paycheck to paycheck with a few hundred in savings for car or medical expenses. It's almost impossible to let the Money build up before something calls to collect it.

[@T-P.]

The real crises is how the American government works and even tho I hate trump I think he might be the storm to make us fix our roof

[@Galactis1]

Or food.

[@Galactis1]

I don't think I've ever had a savings in the 23 years I've been working.

[@teddygingerbear1647]

Isn't it time for another yearly physical? Maybe this year with an honest physician who will initiate the proper referral for psychiatric exam.

[@stevefromsaskatoon830]

The wheel wasn't invented till the Bronze Age , pretty sure we had walls before then .

[@pirateman1966]

Don't be a logical party pooper!

[@ufothing]

stone age not bronze

[@kurtscholz9384]

The wheel technology can be found among stone age technocomplexes, but it didn't have much use beyond toys.

[@stevefromsaskatoon830]

@@kurtscholz9384 No , the wheel is a technical term ( involving the critical metal wheel barring) invented in the Bronze Age. * you have access to the same information as I do , look that shit up and quit sounding like a Flat-earther .

[@kurtscholz9384]

@@stevefromsaskatoon830 stop insulting people and stop posting false claims. There's no need for a metal wheel barring for an object to be defined as a wheel. Just the first picture of a clay wheel of a toy to proof you wrong: upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/d/d3/Remojadas_Wheeled_Figurine.jpg

[@gryjffrs]

I remember watching Carson when I was much younger. He had this way about him the suggested 1. he was barely keepin it legal as Ed chuckled in the background. And 2. there were raunchy things going on there that the television audience wasn't allowed to see. I get a similar vibe from Colbert. Stephen is pretty much a comedic genius but then look at the material he's got to deal with, our cartoon president.

[@jmac46951]

"The buck stops with everybody" - With leadership like that...oh god we are so screwed.

[@kennyw871]

Even worse, there's a shortage of Vaseline. It's gonna be painful. And no, I don't want Donald to kiss me first!

[@milfordcivic6755]

Intelligence and truth stops with MAGAturds

[@SomeRandomJackAss]

So, basically, "Everything I do is not my fault." What a role model...

[@ajivins1]

@J Dial He meant Santa.

[@wisconsinfarmer4742]

In a representative republic, yes . The buck stops with the voters. It is always up to us.

[@emmanuelperez808]

Me being from texas not alot of people are happy that he is here

[@seanurbik2689]

I feel for you, felt the same when he was in California.

[@codyarcher3263]

Esspecially because he's planning on taking all the land along the border from whomever owns it

[@845835]

Any chance you can keep him?

[@spunz83ify]

Yea no shit, man named EMMANUEL PEREZZZZ

[@silversmoke6]

@@spunz83ify seriously?

[@DoxRap]

A 2nd caravan?? Wow! I predict the 2nd caravan will conveniently be forgotten just like the 1st after this saga is over.

[@lanefair2950]

There will be another caravan when the repubes need it for another political ploy.

[@unity6906]

Maybe the 2nd caravan is just the first caravan that walked in a big circle.

[@knightfriedfries2577]

oRaNgE mAn BaD

[@maryrosekent8223]

Knight FriedFries 🍊🍄💩🍊🍄💩

[@socallife890]

"I didn't rant, rave, or get angry" he says as he's ranting, raving, and getting angry. Too funny.

[@mattb1752]

Yelling over the background noise doesn't equate to ranting, raving, or getting mad. But you do you dude.

[@mazing32able]

@@mattb1752 he's ranting

[@mattb1752]

@@mazing32able he very well might be, tbh. I haven't seen the whole clip, just what's been shown here and it's not enough to really work off of. From what little I've seen from this, I wouldn't say that he was ranting.

[@alanali6423]

he's not ranting, just raving :)

[@SpargurYarnCrafts]

Stephen Colbert is literally the only way I can stomach the news anymore.

[@squirrly001]

Yup at least he makes it laughable … otherwise we are sobbing in our tea in a chasm of sadness

[@pdoylemi]

There are also others I like, but Colbert and others are like the beer chaser after a shot of cheap tequila. I still watch and read the real news, but I thank Stephen, and Trevor Noah, and Seth Myers, and others for helping me laugh about it later.

[@Jeudaos]

You are definitely not the only one.

[@MikeBrown-ex9nh]

@@squirrly001 Or in a fit of rage over what this idiot and his followers are doing to our country.

[@AmberAmbwee]

Him and Trevor Noah.

[@jillyburt]

"In 2011, when Mueller was FBI Director, he gave a speech in New York. He explained that globalization and modern technology had changed the nature of organized crime. Rather than being regional networks with a clear structure, he said, organized crime had become international, fluid, sophisticated, and had stakes in the multi-billion dollar range. Its operators were cross-pollinating across countries, religions, and political affiliations, sharing only their greed. They did not care about ideology; they cared about money. They would do anything for a price. These criminal enterprises, he noted, were working to corner the market on oil, gas, and precious metals. And to do so, Mueller explained, they "may infiltrate our businesses. They may provide logistical support to hostile foreign powers. They may try to manipulate those at the highest levels of government. Indeed, these so-called 'iron triangles' of organized criminals, corrupt government officials, and business leaders pose a significant national security threat." Helen Cox Richardson

[@AllTheBestCO]

4:52 Hey, WTF let's: "Make America Peachy Dory, Again?"@ #AssHatSpanky Remember: He who dealt it, smelt it. (Best burn ever.) lol

[@GrammasFavorite]

Wheels are older than walls, eh?..

[@love-hammer]

Everybody knows a constant problem for cavemen was their shelter rolling away.

[@gwendolyngailstenersen8946]

I always figured that caves had walls and wheels were invented by the inhabitants of those caves.....but I don't have a great brain, I'm not a genius and I'm certainly not a master of technology.....so what do I know?

[@bevtuft3572]

He IS a national emergency.

[@trentmcgready3312]

CBS should've declared a National Emergency when it's boss Leslie Moonves was caught Raping and assaulting woman who worked for his Company

[@hazukichanx408]

True. But at least he's a professional at technology. ...Who understands scientific facts like how walls work far better now than in the medieval era, before gunpowder and cannons gave humans the tools to remove large segments of them without much trouble... and before airplanes, hang gliders, even the occasional high-powered pogo stick. Why do they work better now, you may ask? Well, don't! It makes him look bad. La la la, best greatest believe me.

[@kosewa1]

Bev Tuft 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾

[@ebon79]

“Immigrants with construction tools “ 😂

[@josoverthehill]

".... or that's just the effort is takes DT to get up from the table." Now THAT'S a burn.

[@libertyann439]

The last "caravan" worked so well for the midterms...😀

[@MrZwaterbury]

I wonder how much fuel the chopper has wasted waiting for President Trump to actually get on board.

[@jessif.]

So funny. Thanks for making us laugh when the situation is so depressing!

[@peggyjenkinson4514]

In Sweden we don't hear Trump news. A Blessing.

[@ForeverMe543]

This baby has never been told no in his life, and when he does get told no he hears “go harder”. Which is why he’s been accused of rape.

[@Kalumbatsch]

Don't use that milquetoast language, he's a known rapist, period.

[@2thePtBassTuT]

"I'm a professional at technology..." except when it comes to closing an umbrella... :^)

[@jefschobert9765]

I hear your speeches Of you and you Tell us stories How others love you Then tell us We love you too Watching t.v. staring and It feels like it's All a commie stew Oh you say It's not the colors Your care is true Your lies media corruption And used as disruptions You say we miss you When you're not around I hear your speeches I hear your speeches Buy one for a million If I could afford it myself Claim you're a social cure doctor Pretty as a picture So you can claim good results For yourself as well You've got us tuning out And turning upside-down Turning others in Traitors still abound I'm learning Trumpanese I think I'm learning Trumpanese But should I do so? Learning Trumpanese I think I'm learning Trumpanese But should I do so? I hear your speeches I hear your speeches Buy one for a million If I could afford it myself Claim you're a social cure doctor Pretty as a picture So you can claim good results All for yourself as well You've got us tuning out And turning upside-down Turning others in Traitors still abound I'm learning Trumpanese I think I'm learning Trumpanese But should I do so? Learning Trumpanese I think I'm learning Trumpanese But should I do so? He says two sexes, no drugs, no wine Grabbing women by their pussy Is fun not a sin, son for you No lights on so it's dark Every other voter is a Commie traitor Every other voter is in Denial with anger, every other one I'm learning Trumpanese I think I'm learning Trumpanese But should I do so? Learning Trumpanese I think I'm learning Trumpanese But should I do so? I'm learning Trumpanese I think I'm learning Trumpanese But should I do so? Learning Trumpanese I think I'm learning Trumpanese But should we do so? Don't think so, don't think so Learning Trumpanese Learning Trumpanese But should we do so?

[@peggi70]

2thePtBassTuT Lol

[@santoshshankar9183]

I am a professional at technology too...🙏🏽🙄 #H1-Bvisaholder

[@leahryan5560]

“The only thing we have to fear…is EVERYBODY, the depression is all your fault!! The economy used to be peachey-dore!!” 😂😂😂 And Brian Stack’s FDR impression makes it even funnier.

[@MementoX1013]

I missed you, Caravan Dance!

[@lesliewolfe7643]

I love the caravan dance Stephen!

[@AnarchyInsanity]

"I don't have temper tantrums" he says whilst having a temper tantrum. Trump is like that kid you see screaming on the floor of the grocery store because their parents wouldn't buy them candy and screaming "I'm not a cry baby, I'm not !!!!"

[@jennylee9278]

"I'm not a puppet, you're a puppet." yes he really said that.

[@Germanybabe]

Just like my nephews!

[@katiekane5247]

His Dad definitely called him a "worthless cry baby" a lot. He is obsessed with crying & hates babies.

[@namkeorb]

There are actually clips of him saying that he is not a baby

[@mcbrizzle82]

A caravan driven by Shredder and Bazooka Jose' is coming!! We need Inspector Gadget and Bob the Builder ASAP!!

[@junior1able]

Whoa another caravan. Is this one gonna vanish like the last one did after the midterm

[@nhagan001]

Caravan 2: Judgement day. The one who will save the human race from sky net is amongst the caravan. We have to find him before the wrong people do. Else we risk the inevitable nuclear winter.

[@radish1395]

They're going too many left turns and get lost because they didn't follow the presidential instructions of driving over the border and into a desert.

[@g.cosper8306]

The phrase 'word vomit' springs to mind...

[@JoeHapa]

Chopper talk...(raises his glasses)..Wow!That was quick

[@emayaych]

The dance tho...I wasn’t ready 🤣

[@ginger2153]

I do love Stephen's Caravan dance.

[@underverse7]

I am waiting for a hip shakira move and some belly dancing soon !

[@briand8090]

I hope caravans form frequently in Honduras for the next few years.

[@Volfan99]

I love it so fucking much

[@ellengrace4609]

I know, right?!!! I'm so glad I'm not the only one who loves when Stephen twirls! 😂

[@butchbrittany1208]

Needs a GIF.

[@Lugmillord]

Another caravan? Man, he doesn't even try to come up with good lies.

[@jesschristiansen2523]

Haha, Stephen's 'caravan dance' at 2:52 is Da Bomb.

[@kalabashen]

Omg. That caravan dance, though 😂😂😂

[@kennethnash598]

Walking out is temper tantrum.

[@fredcastellano7089]

I remember something my business mentor taught me. He said, "If you're in negotiations and the other side doesn't get up and storm out of the room at least twice, you've left too much on the table".

[@desertflower3996]

I like how he the "president" (spelled with a lower case "pee") told reporters he didn't have a temper tantrum, and yet during the conference, the tone of his voice and body language became ever so increasing with hostility.

[@davidmiller5832]

Lawyers: "One of them is unreachable for the next 3 years", The other one is *Giuliani* .

[@dirkmcnasty8585]

Right!? Best legal team in existance

[@stumped2647]

I played caravan in my jazz band freshman year of high school. Great song

[@timgood9818]

I appreciate the continuity of Colbert always putting his imaginary props away after he’s done with ‘em.

[@JesseStu]

I believe zero words coming out of Donald Trump's mouth. Remember when Presidents focused on helping other people?

[@vicegt]

A side from Putin, its sort of all a blurry mess since 2016.

[@jlind3161]

No I do not, to be honest. Greetz&love&peace Jo&π

[@Sergio-fu7mv]

So true, we’ll never be a strong country being devided and ex presidents knew that. That’s why they would try and unite us. As one there’s nothing that could stop us. Just like ex presidents would play nice with our allies Canada, and Mexico. They knew making the West powerful as a whole would be much more beneficial then separating from each other. He’s literally ruined everything our ex presidents had been working for.

[@Sergio-fu7mv]

*divided

[@transsylvanian9100]

All US presidents have helped the ruling capitalist elites first and foremost. Trump is just too stupid to know how to hide it. Even FDR's social democratic policies were just a way to pacify the labor movement and bribe away the growing unrest among the working class and their anger at the system which had just caused the worst economic crisis they had ever seen, and which might have otherwise escalated to a real revolution which would of course have threatened capitalist power and profits.

[@Vertigo71414]

"If I don't get what I want I'll throw a temper tantrum" We have a moody child running our nation.

[@kimberlys8422]

Eric cartmans dad!!! No dna test required.

[@cerwyddi]

Electoral Collage needs abolished, deactivated, or what ever will keep jokes like this out of the White House

[@CloudsGirl7]

Running, or ruining?

[@alejandro_vallejo_calvo]

Candace DeBoer I think you meant “ruining our nation”.

[@kamaurahamukti5919]

Sharp, sharper, sharpest & hilarious 👏👏👏

[@ninastone9054]

Lmao that dance break!!!!!

[@griever2017]

Professional at technology? The guy doesn't understands umbrellas...

[@glorioskey]

Did you miss the one of him trying to operate one?

[@RoninZulu]

Or toilet paper...

[@prikov1]

This fool is comedy gold. Unfortunate for the country but great for comedians.

[@rodarm7598]

A coworker told me time ago, I quote, God help us out with this incompetent morron we have as president,I said we need to help ourselves, making sure we all vote next elections so won't happen again

[@biancalathetravelerssoul]

OMG!!! Sooooo funny if it wasnt so sad! This man is insane and needs to be out of office!

[@simonrai4327]

2019 Colbert is on point

[@shadowhunter0815]

Can't you just hire a couple of mimes, who act as there is a wall and tell Trump, it is transparent?

[@enviromental1189]

Or just tell him there is a wall already built w/ stealth technology that we stole from the Klingons.

[@LilDemona]

Knowing Trump he would believe it

[@andrewbesso8519]

Tell him only smart people can see the wall.

[@danielen359]

looooooooool so funny

[@OnlyRealsht]

Lol

[@svenjorgenson3224]

Great bit Stephen! Bang on!

[@missleo2003]

I am just waiting for him sing the wheel on bus..lol

[@maineyor5343]

OHHHHHHHHHHH...I havnt heard that in YEARS!!!!!!!!!!!!! lmao!!!!!

[@itwasagoodideaatthetime7980]

2:04 - 2:25 *"Mr President if you want to know what is or is not legal I don't know if I'd ask your lawyers. One of them is unreachable for the next three years."* *~ Stephen Colbert*