I guess we will find out if the GOP has a shred of dignity left.
@Nefilum5 жыл бұрын
We already did. They don't.
@sylviamorgan55 жыл бұрын
Sarah H We already know the answer.
@jazziered1425 жыл бұрын
They've already exposed themselves to what they are.
@mbabaneamputee77255 жыл бұрын
They don’t :)
@mitchjones93425 жыл бұрын
Nefilum You said it!
@JamesFilbird5 жыл бұрын
Outstanding monologue Stephen. You're a breath of fresh air after a full day of enduring all the madness going on in the world. Keep up the great comedy and entertainment you give us in each of your performances.
@couragekarnga87355 жыл бұрын
Gotta laugh, even if it's maniacal.
@bubbles31615 жыл бұрын
That's what you get when you get your news from late shows that are classified as comedy entertainment. LOL !😉 "TDS"
@roni62155 жыл бұрын
For as long as the GOP 's fascist regime allows comedians.
@MapleRhubarb5 жыл бұрын
Clearly he's suffered from running the dishwasher ten times, or having to flush the toilets forever!
@Chunkboi5 жыл бұрын
Well, if Trump didn’t keep flushing his diapers down the toilet, he wouldn’t keep clogging it!
@jimyarbrough99355 жыл бұрын
We know hes lieing about flushing the toilet because hes full of $#@.
@Chunkboi5 жыл бұрын
Jim Yarbrough we know he’s full of himself.
@thechumpsbeendumped.77975 жыл бұрын
To be fair, with his diet maybe he does need to flush 10 times?
@mariag.82425 жыл бұрын
and does anyone think he’s run a dishwasher in his life?
@FrankieJamesNews5 жыл бұрын
Best phrase of 2020: "The Articles of Impeachment against Donald John Trump"
@dontbefatuousjeffrey24945 жыл бұрын
I'm still holding out for "The conviction and sentencing of Donald John Trump"... ...I guess one can dream.
@Vagajammer5 жыл бұрын
@@JT-xj1pg Drumpf won't release it unless he gets to co-star in it.
@Dakhoth5 жыл бұрын
@markmac I think we're more likely to see "disgraced president fakes heart attack."
@spacerivernews5 жыл бұрын
Didn't know the j in donald j trump was john. Learned something new today.
@davidhollenshead48925 жыл бұрын
The best phrase of 2021 will be "We executed the Russian Asset known as Donald J. Trump at 12:01 am..."
@miskatonicalumni56125 жыл бұрын
If someone would just tell Trump that Obama can hold his breath for 10 whole minutes Trump wouldn't be president for much longer.
@reganbigmuzzabaker19925 жыл бұрын
Ha ha i like
@Ncobb23345 жыл бұрын
Conspiracat At least ten. Many people say it is many more than ten.
@darkenergy37425 жыл бұрын
That is Manslaughter
@redlady2225 жыл бұрын
Simple and Brilliant 😂😂
@ittakesallkinds8095 жыл бұрын
You're brilliant!
@thechumpsbeendumped.77975 жыл бұрын
Thank goodness someone in the State Department had Yovanivitch’s back and “got her out on the next plane”. I wonder what they know but can’t prove yet?
@alexanderrussell75975 жыл бұрын
The DSS is an excellent organisation. When you have a president who even in his convoluted mind, he’s even consider to whack one of the state department’s ambassador because she didn’t want to do an illegal act to forego an action benefiting trumps chances for the 2020 election.
@johnabbot15855 жыл бұрын
We need access to that safe...
@Izandaia5 жыл бұрын
I think that last line from Trump, "Ah to hell with it, I just have to suffer through it the way I have all my life" really reveals something about how he views the world and current events. I think he honestly believes, in his heart of hearts, that all this stuff will just blow over, that he's not gonna suffer any consequences for his behavior, just like he always hasn't. He thinks he just has to wait it out, to "suffer through it", and then everything will be fine.
@kruleworld5 жыл бұрын
There won't be any consequences and it will just blow over... Do you really think, in your heart of hearts, that Republicans will look at the evidence and vote with their conscience?
5 жыл бұрын
He's so accomplished at suffering.
@adamdreke5 жыл бұрын
It's sad but probably true that he won't face many, if any consequences. We need to vote him out!
@B_Bodziak5 жыл бұрын
Ahh, isn't he just such a victim.
@lexyswope5 жыл бұрын
Like we've suffered his nastiness since the 2016 primary.
@depressionbeard98825 жыл бұрын
“Trump immediately cited his favorite source: many.” 😂
@FrankieJamesNews5 жыл бұрын
Don't forget his imaginary friend, "Jim". 🤣
@Vagajammer5 жыл бұрын
@@FrankieJamesNews ...or his token black friend
@FrankieJamesNews5 жыл бұрын
@@Vagajammer You mean HIS African American.
@viksaggu90855 жыл бұрын
And Jared, from subway?
@kathleenhammett8495 жыл бұрын
Aye, Mr Many People, Mr They Say, Mr My Friend Jim.. All the voices in his head?
@Matt-bg5wg5 жыл бұрын
Sure sounds like they were planning to "take" Yovonovich out.
@MrRyan-wu4jx5 жыл бұрын
Matt Coombes that’s the reason she was on the first plane out of there without being told why. The fbi knew the president’s goons were gonna assassinate her.
@irenegewinner81935 жыл бұрын
Who hired Hyde? He's obviously a member of Murder, Inc.
@mariag.82425 жыл бұрын
It’s scary stuff and sure needs investigating now - & since the FBI has completed its 4th investigation into Clinton (clearing her again) they have time to do something real
@angelabluebird6095 жыл бұрын
Their being prosecuted and sentenced needs to set a clear and formidable example that trying to harm our ambassadors will bring long and painful regret.
@con9tessa5 жыл бұрын
And not for drinks.
@patriceturnipseed92265 жыл бұрын
"Two words not usually associated with President Trump. Knowledge and consent". Brilliant. 🤣🤣🤣
@abdelhakkhalil76845 жыл бұрын
Absolutely! Trump made the late night shows' hosts! Colbert is really here because of Trump.
@JB-xl2jc5 жыл бұрын
Abdelhak Khalil Colbert was successful long before Trump and will be long after him
@abdelhakkhalil76845 жыл бұрын
@@JB-xl2jc I agree, I should have clarified that. What I meant to say is Trump made Colbert more popular. In fact, just about 2 years ago, Colbert has become the number 1 host of the late night show.
@JB-xl2jc5 жыл бұрын
Abdelhak Khalil Ahhhh gotcha, that makes a lot more sense. I was a fan of Colbert since his Daily Show days and into the Report; but there’s no denying the current political idiocy has bumped his recognition and ratings!
@abdelhakkhalil76845 жыл бұрын
@@JB-xl2jc And rightly so. Colbert was always good, but now he and his team are geniuses and the irony is that Trump uncovered that.
@Aristotelezz5 жыл бұрын
Without the perfect phone call no one would've known about this mess.
@alexanderrussell75975 жыл бұрын
He got too emboldened and spoiled with the outcome of the mueller report thereby claiming that he’s the president and he can do anything! That’s a follow through during the campaign period when he said that he can shoot someone in the time square and not lose a vote!
@cindila20005 жыл бұрын
He called out the names as a threat to who would go down with him. Scare tactic 101
@JSkyGemini5 жыл бұрын
He'll also mention their families. He has no shame and no limit.
@tripwire47275 жыл бұрын
Lol, only limited intelligence. Never underestimate the depths of stupidity, though....
@michealbay12904 жыл бұрын
You Muslim?
@cindila20004 жыл бұрын
Micheal Bay yes. You?
@NewMessage5 жыл бұрын
She should have signed it with a sharpie, really...
@joanbowden76345 жыл бұрын
😂😂😂😂😂
@FrankieJamesNews5 жыл бұрын
That would have been epic!
@cleverusername93695 жыл бұрын
The "press secretary" Stephanie Grisham just tweeted about how outrageous it is that everyone who signed the articles of impeachment got a ceremonial pen, as is standard and traditional for big events. Trump's done the same. Furthermore, after the sharpiegate thing with the weather map during the hurricane, his website was selling customized markers for $15/pop.
@dontbefatuousjeffrey24945 жыл бұрын
She has too much self-respect for "the pen you can read from space" (or in Trump's case, "the scrawl you can identify with a drone headed for Iran")...
@b3z3jm3nny5 жыл бұрын
Mason Schwalm it’s so she can give away multiple pens used to sign the impeachment papers, it’s a pretty common practice for bills multiple people would want a souvenir from
@Kmaxbature5 жыл бұрын
This is Stephen Colbert's finest work! Every single joke deserves an EMMY.
@kalindatchev9945 жыл бұрын
True, there was some extremely high-quality stuff in there... and lots of it!
@rachaelsman25 жыл бұрын
You will hate yourself for saying that soon .kzbin.info/www/bejne/g4PXdpqanM-SjrM
@rachaelsman25 жыл бұрын
@@kalindatchev994 if it's anything but high quality laughter your probably being lied to. kzbin.info/www/bejne/g4PXdpqanM-SjrM
@vwa98325 жыл бұрын
yo, you straight gangsta yo! you spit rhymes?
@lisabradley355 жыл бұрын
My favorite monologue this year.
@michelchartrand37195 жыл бұрын
When Mitch read "Donald John Trump" that third time, I think I actually heard some sadness and choking up in his voice.
@marshwetland38085 жыл бұрын
@Pronto Spot0on, rather than ironic.
@judioregan42105 жыл бұрын
Michel Chartrand - nah, that was either just his breakfast, or the crow he is now being forced to eat.
@andrewmontenegroe32965 жыл бұрын
I think we all heard...”how the hell I am going to cover this up?”
@daviddelaney24074 жыл бұрын
as per Randy Rainbow, we've found it's actually Donald Jessica Trump. --Dave, the pink glasses are iconic
@evanpatterson7098 Жыл бұрын
Nope!! He was choking on the skull of a small child.😂😂
@BrainDeadIcon5 жыл бұрын
It’s a “witch hunt” huh? Well we’ve found a lot of witches so far
@thomashooper91485 жыл бұрын
Hahaha sure you have! You wouldn’t be talking out of your rear?
@Madeupfakerobot5 жыл бұрын
@@thomashooper9148 i know these libtard fools!! Since when is EVIDENCE considered something the. Courts use
@niveknanorc73165 жыл бұрын
@Dak Lamerbusch so he can enjoy his "many" friends,,er fiends,,,
@bandiit4205 жыл бұрын
@Didymus Mac Flynn is an innocent man who is now withdrawing his guilty plea because he's innocent.
@purplepill17995 жыл бұрын
Not even Holloween would have seen so many ghosts as the Republicans after elections this year! 💯
@myself0475 жыл бұрын
I really want a journalist to ask him the names of the 1. Many 2. A lot of people 3. People 4. Some That he keeps bringing out to validate his lies.
@maraplantrees45435 жыл бұрын
aShura everyone, everybody, IN HISTORY
@paulallen5795 жыл бұрын
This. How does he get away with this? Just ask ”I don’t think you’re correct, can you name some of them?” And if he refuses, ask ”so we have to take your word on blind faith?”.
@simongiles97495 жыл бұрын
@markmac Don't forget John Baron, that reliable source who sounds "nothing" like Trumo.
@Bevity5 жыл бұрын
There are too many to name, any one of them can tell you that!
@B_Bodziak5 жыл бұрын
And what exactly are they always "saying"?
@ProctorsGamble5 жыл бұрын
Giuliani: What’s your favorite lie? Impotus: I don’t lie. Giuliani: Mine too!
@janetokeefe51305 жыл бұрын
Perfect!
@adrianwaterman1335 жыл бұрын
Brilliant
@con9tessa5 жыл бұрын
Love that one!!!
@g.g.40105 жыл бұрын
*Brilliant as ever.* _Thank you so much Stephen for keeping us sane in this crazy times._
@VeganDefinition5 жыл бұрын
This is how many times Stephen Colbert has roasted Trump 👇🏾
@kathysmith64135 жыл бұрын
whatever it is not enough
@JT-xj1pg5 жыл бұрын
You're so desperate for likes, that's sad
@ronjohnson215 жыл бұрын
It never gets old!👌👍😆
@219720121455255 жыл бұрын
markmac 🤭
@cookies37805 жыл бұрын
Multiplied by ten.
@Hi.Im.Chucky5 жыл бұрын
Mitch sounded like he was about to cry .
@vivigesso37565 жыл бұрын
@Ghenghis Khan Turtles are physically unable to cry.
@Shylade5 жыл бұрын
Yup.. his career is done and he knows it. It’s a bad situation to be in for him. Damned if you do damned if you don’t so might as well play dumb
@dmarie9235 жыл бұрын
@@vivigesso3756 underrated
@scottmorgan83335 жыл бұрын
Trump doing a roll call is like he's checking for loyalty. Like he invited them all and he kept a list to see who showed up and who didn't. So awkward.
@Jillians10255 жыл бұрын
Yep. That buffoon can't help himself.
@ellamone99985 жыл бұрын
That's good, Trump will be ready for his roll calls a few times a day in jail. Nice practice in reverse hahaha
@hlcepeda5 жыл бұрын
Honestly
@stuartjamesgemmell5 жыл бұрын
This is so true. Checking for loyalty but also a threat like ‘we’re all going down if we don’t stick together’
@couragekarnga87355 жыл бұрын
Well, he expected loyalty from James Comey. How did that turn out?
@Annie-zd6rn5 жыл бұрын
Parnas has spilled the beans on "everyone in the loop." Where have we heard that before? Oh that's right, it was Sondland that said it too. But Parnas mentioned that BARR was also the team!
@suebarrow59735 жыл бұрын
I think he will be easy for them to discount. Just think of the Kavanagh fiasco
@steve1978ger5 жыл бұрын
I'm not saying it's necessarily wrong, only that Parnas has shit credibility
@mrdfac5 жыл бұрын
@@steve1978ger He wants to stay out of jail.
@riheg5 жыл бұрын
As I understand it the Democrats rushed impeachment so Parnas’ testimony didn’t get included. A show for the media is all. Am I wrong?
@MyPhone-wq8xo5 жыл бұрын
This sounds exactly like the Michael Cohen testimony....how many ppl gotta tell the truth
@MikeIdy60005 жыл бұрын
Citing his favorite source: "Many"
@Chunkboi5 жыл бұрын
So he’s citing Legion, for he is many.
@queenannesrevenge14375 жыл бұрын
@@Chunkboi Many demons crawling around inside him.
@Chunkboi5 жыл бұрын
Queen Anne's Revenge they’ve been trying to get out and find a better host.
@windbreaker575 жыл бұрын
That's tremendous!
@WhiteFangofWar4 жыл бұрын
@@queenannesrevenge1437 Covefe f'tagn.
@solaris-71155 жыл бұрын
Sending appreciation from New Zealand 🇳🇿!!
@patlynch65175 жыл бұрын
Thanks! I would love to visit New Zealand Every day is a fresh nightmare here
@toadjiang76265 жыл бұрын
Trump: "I can shoot somebody at the senate impeachment trial and still won't get convicted." Moscow Mitch: "Yes you can, boss. Have fun!" Lindsey Graham: "You need my gun to do that, boss?" Rudy Giuliani: "Leave the corpse for me, boss, I haven't drunk human blood for days." Stephen Miller: "Did someone just say corpse?" [sounds of drooling]
@mikenoble915 жыл бұрын
Fox News: "Is shooting people even a crime, really?"
@fatlacesthedon5 жыл бұрын
Faux news: "I think it's disgusting that the democrats are more mad about the cannibalized person when the presidents shoulder is really hurting, that .38 had an awful lotta kickback, his ears just stopped ringing, I mean do the democrats even care about that!? Disgusting!"
@brickdebrick21675 жыл бұрын
That's enough!! Trump has done nothing wrong and you know it. He just sacrificed his lifestyle to save America and you just criticize him for no reason. Thanks to Trump, the American dream is back. He's a real hero. I thank God every day that he is our President and you should do the same.
@dragon8me25 жыл бұрын
A round for this man... this comment is as high as height goes. Now.. don't leave out any more monsters... we have perfect actors to star in the monster flicks. A merry monster flick time.
@cleverusername93695 жыл бұрын
Stephanie Grisham: appears on Fox, tweets a picture of the 2nd Amendment, and continues never giving a press briefing.
@KingSulley5 жыл бұрын
It's sad that were laughing at this. Not too long ago half the country would be out with pitch forks.
@vwa98325 жыл бұрын
yo, you straight gangsta yo!
@chrismaxwell22745 жыл бұрын
30%
@JSkyGemini5 жыл бұрын
That sounds like a plan, actually!
@JudyTootCorn5 жыл бұрын
Now that would be a true "witch hunt".
@khazms5 жыл бұрын
Yeah, well that's illegal and also no one wants mace or tear gas and baton/shield bashing their faces.
@georgelayton66415 жыл бұрын
Poor trump, he's had to live with himself his entire life.
@wizardtim85735 жыл бұрын
Considering how narcissistic he is, probably the best life he could've had o.O
@ChaoticAngelKitten5 жыл бұрын
He loves himself more then he loves anything... even KFC... so I think he’s ok with that... if he could marry himself, he probably would... and then he probably wouldn’t ever get divorced again because he’s his own best match... >,> most other people can’t stand him in more then small doses.
@ChaoticAngelKitten5 жыл бұрын
@Filhote de Atum ya you're probably right but he still loves himself more. Lol
@loinnirwhitby66895 жыл бұрын
I really can't imagine anyone who deserves it more.
@tracer7405 жыл бұрын
@@cmdraftbrn - ... YIPES!
@sajadb_dev5 жыл бұрын
I swear just leave trump with Gordon Ramsay in a room alone he'll confess to everything, I've been watching kitchen nightmares too much
@danielgehring74375 жыл бұрын
I'm firmly convinced if you just left Trump in a room with a tape recorder and a mirror you'd have a full confession in fifteen minutes.
@mariposa95065 жыл бұрын
Do you need an intervention?
@mc14120075 жыл бұрын
@@danielgehring7437 u mean seconds
@rasmie88585 жыл бұрын
Trump: My tax returns are good, perhaps the best in history of tax returns Ramsay: Your lies...are bland, dry, dreadful. Ghastly.
@zachschmidt5 жыл бұрын
Nino would get a confession out of him, and he'd have the pictures to prove it.
@ljosephdumas31135 жыл бұрын
"I just have to suffer through it..." Most pathetic 'human' being, EVER.
@linkeffect825 жыл бұрын
Pretty much, though the ones that work willingly and lie so candidly for him are pretty close to that top spot.
@pallao35005 жыл бұрын
"Trumo" fits really well actually; It's an anagram of "Tumor".
@hannahrachel50995 жыл бұрын
“Ava-cadaver ta-dead” I lost it 😂 I’m laughing so much right now 😂
@verfuncht5 жыл бұрын
How is a foreign official saying "I'll help you get re-elected if you get rid of someone who says bad things about me" not the most corrupt thing imaginable?
@elizabethroberts91175 жыл бұрын
One Woman Died Having Acid Thrown In Her Face. She Was With Team Yovanovitch! M. Yovanonvitch Left Ukraine remembering What Happened To Her. Now, (She) was being Threatened....., I'd Leave Too!!!!!!
@LSM_Lover4 жыл бұрын
It is
@evanpatterson7098 Жыл бұрын
It was only Tuesday. He was just getting warmed up.😂😂
@reenakblas23075 жыл бұрын
Am off to DC. I have to watch the trial, LIVE. I have grandkids to tell the story. I have to be able to tell them I was there.🤣😂
@GaryandChristy20125 жыл бұрын
Reena K Blas the trial will be a letdown lol
@tonygunk18865 жыл бұрын
"Female fool"? Yes because one of the best foreign ambassadors in American history, including 2 awards for her outstanding work.. Is a fool
@Anankin125 жыл бұрын
[female] bc I guess Ukrainian has gendered nouns
@nadyanathania38475 жыл бұрын
they also called a military veteran with a purple heart a fake so
@Liliputian075 жыл бұрын
DISPOSE OF THE WOMAN -- strange russian fox cartoon
@couragekarnga87355 жыл бұрын
Coming from the administration that put children in cages!
@stevenjordal84275 жыл бұрын
Ohh. Mr. Gunk, Gunk out.
@pascal90555 жыл бұрын
“Many” and “They” are equally his favorites.
@hawkeye59555 жыл бұрын
The "many" only exists in his head.
@k.nicoledavis85375 жыл бұрын
But still loves them more than Eric!
@niveknanorc73165 жыл бұрын
He is Legion,,,
@alexanderrussell75975 жыл бұрын
I’m wondering sometimes who’s talking, smeagol or gollum? Or the bloody lord of mordor!!
@rancisgamer5 жыл бұрын
It wasn't pen after pen... she uses different colors to appeal to the man child president. That's the only way he will read it...oooh colorful
@dontbefatuousjeffrey24945 жыл бұрын
Yes. It was actually all the primary colours from a box of Crayola (an added bonus is she gets in a free Queer Pride message - nothing like a little side-shade for Pence).
@dannythompson19485 жыл бұрын
@Susan Sullivan there's nothing homophobic about that guys comment.. Queer is not an offensive term. And if you've defending pence, then you are lost, ma'am..
@dontbefatuousjeffrey24945 жыл бұрын
@Susan Sullivan really, Susan? That was your take from that post? Have fun in upside-down land, then (also, "homophobic" probably doesn't need the qualifier "rude", but as Little Ms Prissy here is struggling with simple English comprehension, let alone jokes, I can probably let that slide...). Also, Danny, I feel ya, but not a guy. But I don't really mind - and yeah, if a Pence-Defence is where that was going, then I'll just sashay on outta THIS thread. Girl's gotta have standards ;-)
@UncleEbenezer775 жыл бұрын
"America's mayor" to Trumplethinskin's crony...Has there ever been such a yuge fall from grace as Giuliani's? #bigly
@truthalonetriumphs65725 жыл бұрын
It's worse than that ... more looney than Trump 🤣
@mitchjones93425 жыл бұрын
Mike Barbas spot on brudda!! America’s mayor in America’s toilet!
@AnnieWarbux5 жыл бұрын
I think that Rudy is begging to be on Trumps counsel to claim attorney client priveleges that he would not otherwise have!!
@silentbob79845 жыл бұрын
@ Mike Barbas Trumplethinskin, I love this! Trumplethinskin and his Trumpalumpas!
@RmcBlueSky5 жыл бұрын
My NY friends said that he was not really popular pre 9/11. Everything is a façade. He was just as racist as Trump. The thing is Yorkers survives in BS. Got a friend that worked in car rental company in LV, said that the worst customers are from NYC. The reason is , according to my NY friends, NYC is so populationaly condensed that it push you to be competitive. That's y they believe that if you can make it in NYC you can make it anywhere.
@stevepax28095 жыл бұрын
so guilty---any senator who votes innocent is an accomplice.
@sharonmullins19575 жыл бұрын
Worse than that at this point; traitors.
@stoodmuffinpersonal31445 жыл бұрын
Yup. Yeah. Yup.
@jbcoolestgamer97865 жыл бұрын
Trump 2020... sue me
@tonib.30165 жыл бұрын
@DAVID GOERTZ you do realize that trump is allowed to submit exculpatory evidence right? Yet he hasn't produced even a single document,nor has he allowed a single witness like Pompeo,Bolton or Mulvaney to testify. Sure...let's hear from Hunter Biden tho,even tho that's just SO fucking stupid but whatever,I dont even GAF. If Dumpy had any evidence or witnesses he could produce to prove hes innocent,why hasn't he done that yet? Or do you always believe what pathological liars like Dump tell ya?
@brandoncrusen91605 жыл бұрын
@DAVID GOERTZ You do realize Trump admitted to impeachable conduct? This is not about second hand witnesses. It's pretty fucking clear.
@openmind7635 жыл бұрын
Once impeached, always impeached and forever impeached.
@johncampbell3355 жыл бұрын
One of Stephen's finest monologues.
@mamawray5 жыл бұрын
"It's all in the family". I died.
@magicsantos26815 жыл бұрын
One word for this administration ... jail! 👌👍😉
@dafttool5 жыл бұрын
If Trump is tired of suffering, he can always resign 🤔
@jrtortellini25405 жыл бұрын
God no. He has helped us way to much. Lower taxes has really helped my family survive and plus keeping my job with a huge raise I just got.. thank God Hilary didn't get in and tax us another 20 percent.. when you grow up and work one day you will understand
@yourfavoritegames49715 жыл бұрын
At least Hillary knew how to read a teleprompter and go to a rally without screaming lightbulbs that make him look orange when even an Oompa Loompa would so it looks like a blind man gave him a spray tan
@jrtortellini25405 жыл бұрын
@@yourfavoritegames4971 OMG.. that's why you hate him ? You will love Sharia law.. and when Democrats get back in free speech will be gone and posting bad comments about political persons can give you a massive life penalty in all other countries
@hungfao5 жыл бұрын
@@jrtortellini2540 I, too, got a huge raise, but Trump remains an imbecile. I've been around since Eisenhower. Trump is the worst president in my lifetime. So when you say things like 'He has helped us way too much', I have no idea what you mean by 'us'. You are the spokesperson for no one. So, you must be speaking about yourself in which case it isn't surprising that you would think, like Trump, that the nation and the world revolves around you and your situation. More people haven't benefited one iota than have. The truth is that he is running his campaign as 'promises made, promises kept' - and yet he virtually hasn't kept any of the promise he made as he campaigned. You might respond by asking me to cite the facts and I will be happy to. The list is long, factual, and could make you cry. Or you, yes, you, can always bask in the knowledge that you, yes, you somehow benefited from something Trump did so much that you have to keep reminding everyone just how lucky we all are that you, yes, you, are doing well.
@jrtortellini25405 жыл бұрын
@@hungfao I'm assuming your an Obama fan with sweat blood and tears.. what the hell did he do for this country in 8 years ? What ?
@kylestubbs88675 жыл бұрын
I think Colbert’s staff _really_ enjoys mashing Mitch McConnel’s face with mythological creatures.
@sinistar995 жыл бұрын
Mitchological creatures...
@alexanderrussell75975 жыл бұрын
Their great inspiration is Moscow Mitch features himself 😀😀
@tuckerbowen46264 жыл бұрын
Technically Cthulhu is a _literary_ creature...
@TheReal008Zulu5 жыл бұрын
It almost sounded like the Turtle was going to start crying. I guess the gravity of the situation had caught up with him, and he realised he was backing a lame horse.
@estebanhombredeguerra65035 жыл бұрын
Citing his favorite source: "many" Legendary!
@joed86945 жыл бұрын
Yes, "many" refers to the FOX news team.
@dannyhughes63065 жыл бұрын
The notes were written on Ritz Carlton Vienna note paper. Wasn't Nunes in Vienna last year...???
@AloraCanRead5 жыл бұрын
The jokes in this episode were so fuking on point lmao!
@leftyme45685 жыл бұрын
"It`s all in the family" made my day , but don`t make fun of Parnas, because he might save your country!!!
@roni62155 жыл бұрын
If Lev doesn't get "Epsteined " .
@meljamz5 жыл бұрын
I was soooo waiting on Stephen to say "Where in the World is Carmen San Diego". NAILED IT!!!
@sharonmullins19575 жыл бұрын
I was waiting for Marco?....................Rubio.
@meljamz5 жыл бұрын
@@sharonmullins1957 that is fuuunnnnyyy😆😆
@smartmoufx68005 жыл бұрын
"The trial is on like JohnSON, NixON, and ClinTON!" 😂🤣😂
@peterpluim79125 жыл бұрын
I guess we will see if individual senators have some kind of spine left.
@connyleicht65675 жыл бұрын
Doubt it, but would be really impressed, if there were any...
@rayprice20155 жыл бұрын
Don't count on it.
@ericno4u5 жыл бұрын
Vegas wouldn't touch those numbers
@allnargles5 жыл бұрын
Putin has a damaging file on everyone and they know it.
@victorhawkins34615 жыл бұрын
Stephen -- thank you and your entire crew for giving me back my sanity once a day, if only for 5 days a week!
@JohnDoe-ou7xm5 жыл бұрын
Victor Hawkins same here
@jilldaubresse58735 жыл бұрын
I just fell out of my chair laughing, almost. Great show, Stephen.
@ryanencher36695 жыл бұрын
“citing his favorite source: Many”
@freema92465 жыл бұрын
yes. shorthand or "many idiots"
@lesleyleith44405 жыл бұрын
Ryan Encher Or perhaps his favourite Sauce, Special Sauce, from McDonalds. It’s even named after him.😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
@DrownedInExile5 жыл бұрын
Wasn't that the antagonist from the horror sci-fi game System Shock 2?
@TheSuzberry5 жыл бұрын
Trump has a second source: Some.
@Games_and_Music5 жыл бұрын
He has People, Some and Many. Also his senses work intermittently from each other, sometimes he sees, sometimes he hears, he even reads sometimes.
@merylbonderow59935 жыл бұрын
Have you heard about “A YUGE Number?” Them, too.
@fortepiano44915 жыл бұрын
Body once told me
@sdfkjgh5 жыл бұрын
Forte Piano: www.neilcic.com/mouthsounds/ www.neilcic.com/mouthsilence/ www.neilcic.com/mouthmoods/
@tomaf5 жыл бұрын
Not to mention "some very smart people." ;-P
@kenna1635 жыл бұрын
Even his imaginary friends don't answer him. SAD.
@GingerGingie5 жыл бұрын
"It's all in the family"
@jeffcolorado5 жыл бұрын
trump calling out names is a subtle way of threatening, "If I go down, you go down with me." Interesting there were no women mentioned in his litany.
@robbinsmith48065 жыл бұрын
Good point.
@mohameddahir43385 жыл бұрын
Jeff B good one ☝🏼
@joshualagrimas95555 жыл бұрын
this is LITERALLY the most historical event in the history of the United States of America. #TrumpForPrison2020
@basicpigeonbee5 жыл бұрын
It's not even in top ten, but it is important.
@JoeCAlvarado5 жыл бұрын
Agree
@OTPpride5 жыл бұрын
Only because impeachment will lose meaning to partisanship
@germanpereira95445 жыл бұрын
Not really but i know what you mean.
@1101001110005 жыл бұрын
If, even after all the evidence has been brought into public light of day. The Republican party still insists upon hopping along the Drumhead of partisan exoneration. Then least we could do is to call the lot of em Joeys.
@protiliusproductions5 жыл бұрын
“Let’s obey laws.” LOL!!!
@mixmastrkno13375 жыл бұрын
Haha.. Trump sounds like he's trying to reboot Romper Room.."I see David, and Johnny, and Billy, and Rudy..."
@kathyfranklund37875 жыл бұрын
MixMastrKno1 Only a true Minnesotan wouldn’t understand romper room!
@jrtortellini25405 жыл бұрын
I can't wait till Democrats get back in and rid your filthy free speech.. you should be delt
@evanpatterson7098 Жыл бұрын
Except a retarded criminal version. 😂😂
@mauro.66665 жыл бұрын
Locking him up, locking him up, locking him up.
@Gabryal775 жыл бұрын
Ok I lost it at "it's all in the family"
@madbug19655 жыл бұрын
One of those pens is going to the Trump presidential library.
@lesleyleith44405 жыл бұрын
madbug1965 Along with the roll of toilet paper that stuck to his shoe. Can you imagine what a tRump Presidential Library would contain........ lots of back copies of Hustler and other porno classics. Spankers Weekly comes to mind.👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼💕💕💕💕😂😂😂😂Love from Canada🇨🇦🇨🇦🇨🇦🇨🇦🇨🇦🇨🇦🇨🇦
@shrek11405 жыл бұрын
He doesn’t know how to read
@scottrowe5335 жыл бұрын
The Trump Presidential Library is going to be a small rolling book cart, stacked with comic books, in the Leavenworth Federal Penitentiary inmates' library.
@thechumpsbeendumped.77975 жыл бұрын
Lesley Leith don’t forget the rolled up copy of Forbes magazine and the video with those hookers in Moscow?
@tylerdurden43925 жыл бұрын
@@shrek1140 Nope, just wrote "The Art of the Deal", a best-seller that you couldn't comprehend if you multiplied your IQ by ten.
@armystitch45 жыл бұрын
Momma likes too. Nearly everyone in my family are conservative Republicans. Not since I was 12 & my grandma knocked over a whole shelf of glass knickknacks 5 secs after lecturing us to keep our hands in our pockets, have I felt such glee.
@Bevity5 жыл бұрын
armystitch I felt that! Delicious!
@bravofanone93215 жыл бұрын
😂😂😂😂😂😂
@redlady2225 жыл бұрын
Personally, I feel like jumping around in glee like the ‘Berries and Cream’ weirdo in the old Starburst commercials.
@als90065 жыл бұрын
That’s a crackin’ good story!
@FlorisGerber5 жыл бұрын
@@donantonio5646 you call trump "granny"?
@AsmodeusMictian5 жыл бұрын
"Knowledge and consent..." Hello, 911? I'd like to report a murder.....
@nehpets2165 жыл бұрын
You might want the Fire Department...
@raymondkymsuttle5 жыл бұрын
Truly the best Colbert clip ever. The writers were on fire when they wrote this!
@frankrwalsh5 жыл бұрын
Rudy looks like he looked into the Ark.
@JT-xj1pg5 жыл бұрын
So do you lol
@ninjabluefyre38155 жыл бұрын
No that's Mitch McConnell, it was one of his alter egos.
@kaivickers1665 жыл бұрын
Frank Walsh - That makes me want to watch Indiana Jones again.
@kaivickers1665 жыл бұрын
J T - I can’t tell if you’re defending Giuliani or are just being a dick.
@MrMome16125 жыл бұрын
@@JT-xj1pgBe Nice!
@duquerendon39195 жыл бұрын
Brings a smile to my face watching Nancy Pelosi take such great pleasure in signing the articles of impeachment.. Dear Mrs. Pelosi any chance of me getting one of those pens! Lmao! Inpeachadent Drumf 2020 : )
@SNUPE_FOXX925 жыл бұрын
This shit is hilarious.... dude legit left a paper trail 😂
@misterflibble66015 жыл бұрын
McCthulhu, very Lovecraftian. The Great Old Ones are pleased
@stormyr.33155 жыл бұрын
I like his version better than the actual process.
@SilverLaBelle5 жыл бұрын
I feel like Colbert has DMed a lot of Dungeons and Dragons with that explanation. I was ready to get my dice and character sheet ready.
@1000YearBeard5 жыл бұрын
This was one of the best Late Shows with Stephen Cthulhurt.
@tarrynlea5 жыл бұрын
Truly. Mind-blowing.
@cheknfaks5 жыл бұрын
"He kept going..naming nobody in the room."
@tmitz735 жыл бұрын
Stephen Colbert - Better coverage than CNN!!!
@TheEcono5 жыл бұрын
💯🤗
@josealbertoriveradonan27615 жыл бұрын
Stephen deserves an EMMY for everytime he has delivered such good jokes just as the Mc’ Cthulu monster one. 😂
@Palidor19 Жыл бұрын
One of the best skits I’ve seen, performed and executed flawlessly
@DesertEagleV5 жыл бұрын
What kind trial is it when you know the verdict before it begins?
@SpeckleKen5 жыл бұрын
American.
@marymarsella90505 жыл бұрын
Thank God for this monologue, Stephen, Trevor, Seth, Jimmie K, as we suffer through this admin.
@ValerieJNorse5 жыл бұрын
And Randy Rainbow!
@sydneymarshall32045 жыл бұрын
5:34 he had to write the crime down. He couldn’t remember which crime he had gone there to commit.
@SCBJQ5 жыл бұрын
When Trump keeps rambling on with his usual self-pitying whining , they should just drown him out with music, like they do at award shows.
@mathdemigod81625 жыл бұрын
04:47 How did he not say "middle-aged Charlie Brown?" The hair is perfect XD
@merbst5 жыл бұрын
They should hire you as a consultant! 😆
@theheartofablackbird21095 жыл бұрын
I thought the J stood for "Jackass"?
@TheEcono5 жыл бұрын
😂💯
@theheartofablackbird21095 жыл бұрын
@ Nah, he's not even smart enough.
@Chunkboi5 жыл бұрын
President 💩: “The J stands for ‘jene-yiss’.”
@niveknanorc73165 жыл бұрын
same : )
@Ham_Strokers_Ejacula5 жыл бұрын
Moscow Mitch sounds like he choking up on them words 😂😂😂
@lebredamcelroy8325 жыл бұрын
Where the PPP tape measure 🐸👹🐀
@Ham_Strokers_Ejacula5 жыл бұрын
@@redwolfcanisrufus ya he did, could barely get them out near the end 😂😂
@Ham_Strokers_Ejacula5 жыл бұрын
@@lebredamcelroy832 I see your still on the pipe...its ok, when sanders wins 2020 you can get that looked at with your free healthcare 💩🤡🤯🤯
@jessi58725 жыл бұрын
What has he suffered through all his life? Answer: Bone Spurs.
@gameglitch36865 жыл бұрын
Answer: Moronic thinking
@lindabisignsni13975 жыл бұрын
Not a damn thing. Daddy took care of him.
@mimigiggles41995 жыл бұрын
Constipation of the brain, diarrhea of the mouth
@DoveAlexa5 жыл бұрын
I'm surprised he hasn't made up an ultra rare condition that only he has because he is so special
@mimigiggles41995 жыл бұрын
@Mike Keller his golden toilets are s***y.
@dingobat23895 жыл бұрын
This episode is pure magic. Thank you The Late Show. You keep us sane.
@KitKatToeBeans5 жыл бұрын
tRump: “Many (of the voices in my head) believe..”
@kaivickers1665 жыл бұрын
“The Articles of Impeachment for Donald John Trump...” So, was it good for you too?
@chrissiek87065 жыл бұрын
You finished too early
@janellevans8785 жыл бұрын
@Mike Keller Let's save it for the verdict or outcome.
@kaivickers1665 жыл бұрын
Janell Evans - Everyone who isn’t in complete denial knows the outcome. That’s why we have to celebrate the little things.
@janellevans8785 жыл бұрын
Sorry, I'm not taking my eyes off the prize.
@kaivickers1665 жыл бұрын
Janell Evans - Then you’ll have a front row seat to the tragedy.
@kris.i12495 жыл бұрын
"Where's Jared - where's David - where's Mike ... Where am I??"
@alexanderrussell75975 жыл бұрын
Kris.i > Where’s my cell mates!!
@felichia8085 жыл бұрын
I really needed this to laugh today. Love you Stephen Colbert Show 💖
@gogotrololo5 жыл бұрын
Moscow Mitch sounds like he's about to cry as he reads "The articles of impeachment against donald john trump"
@MareShoop5 жыл бұрын
GnarlyKicks it’s just his neck wattle vibrating and choking him up 🥰
@gogotrololo5 жыл бұрын
@@MareShoop eww, that guy is so gross LOL
@LeftIsBest0015 жыл бұрын
That "giant impeach" animation was hilarious tonight.. "They got me! They got me.." 😂😂😂 0:29
@Moonwalker4ever875 жыл бұрын
Stephen Colbert is a maniac 😂 gotta love him
@jrtortellini25405 жыл бұрын
I agree. This guys sucks
@lucylincoln32855 жыл бұрын
"Ya don't write the crime down, ya DUMMY!" 🤣🤣🤣
@MizuMark5 жыл бұрын
Quit giving me hope like hes actually going to he removed from office
@CaptainHillyan5 жыл бұрын
There's no sight more beautiful than seeing a rat go into a jail cell cocoon and metamorphosis into a canary.
@ValerieJNorse5 жыл бұрын
Excellent!
@darklighter665 жыл бұрын
Go to the fridge, get a beer. You earned it.
@lesleyleith44405 жыл бұрын
Hillyan Perfect, just perfect. A wonderful comment.💕💕💕💕💕💕😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
@resileaf95015 жыл бұрын
Such beautiful singing too.
@MoeBulle5 жыл бұрын
Are we gonna sidestep "pluck the maidenhead of Adam Schiff?"
@ValerieJNorse5 жыл бұрын
Yes. Please.
@831mrscardoso5 жыл бұрын
Bravo Stephen Colbert! Been waiting for this genius monologue since the Lev Parnas evidence drop and Maddow interview. That's just crazy how they were actually plotting a hit on Ambassador Marie from the inside.
@garrettstitt54895 жыл бұрын
Yep...he lost it. Trump is now “Miss Mary Anne - Romper Room” 25TH!... ITS NOT TOO LATE! (Actually, it’s the perfect time)
@willgetbettereventually1245 жыл бұрын
Noooooo. He’d get away with everything. I want him impeached AND imprisoned!
@garrettstitt54895 жыл бұрын
sheila taylor Sheeeeet, like he’s not getting away with everything now?