Cooking Simulator - Impression Depression

[@Marksman2oo7]

Jerma: “can you imagine *wacky scenario*? You’d be like ‘rational reaction’”!

[@yiff]

Can you imagine if a streamer owed their audience 2 million? You'd be like "oh shit, that's a lot of debt!"

[@gamblerofrats]

Can you imagine if fucking WORMS started raining??? You'd be like "oh SHIT, it's raining WORMS"

[@Katia_Managan]

Can you imagine if the impostor is sus? You'd be like 😳!

[@eyen22buck]

Can you imagine if the psychopath starts doing crazy shit? You'd be like oh shit, it's a psychopath!

[@spaghettivase4808]

Could you imagine if the ground started shaking? You’d be like “Shit, the ground is shaking!”

[@MasterCuddless]

sometimes i wonder if jerma really reads chat or just pretends to read chat just to make a joke in his head

[@Owen.Fallon]

One time I asked Jerma is he was alive, and he said “Guess”

[@ManWithTheCow]

@The Lonely Proto prerecorded andy

[@KingMB_XJ_Official]

18:50 This one was absolutely from his head.

[@caffenefree]

I think jerma should start a tv show where he goes to places where people work and has to do a shift without training and you just have to watch and let him fumble through and figure out how to do it

[@feloniouz770]

"Jerma Nine Eight Fired"

[@asph0le531]

@@feloniouz770 thats an amazing name

[@Neonator]

"Jerma Nine to Five"

[@antoka5375]

That would be so fucking amazing omg-

[@lanog40]

@@feloniouz770 I hope he notices this one day

[@SpaceSmurf3000]

Imagine walking into the kitchen and watching the guy you want to inherit your shop putting 2kg of kraft singles on a pizza

[@Unfixable]

2.2 kg

[@ChuckNorrizHIM]

Fire that man! Now hire him so I can fucking fire him... AGAIN. You're hired! You passed the test

[@anxietyprimev6983]

Wikipedia says that a single kraft single is 21 grams, and there are 2000 grams in two kilograms, so 2000 divided by 21 equals approximately 95 kraft singles. Those are rookie numbers, you should see the shit we pull here in America.

[@MaksKuaka]

​​​​@@anxietyprimev6983a certain tree dwelling species on Kashyyyk put over 100 kraft singles on a pizza. Those are Wookie numbers, you should see the type of shit pull here on Tatooine

[@meyague]

​@@anxietyprimev6983 we don't want to

[@Quixfix02]

Local streamer inflicts multiple piss wounds on pizza shop owner, poisons customers.

[@andrewscott1153]

how to wound with piss?

[@chespresso]

@@andrewscott1153 piercing damage

[@pucktoad]

Jerma manages to capture the magic of being a child along with the cynicism of being an adult in his tirade on "bird shit pizza."

[@HenryIVth]

I've literally never heard of "gross" pizzas in restaurants so before I saw this comment I thought he was just ranting about something entirely made up.

[@grim66]

@@HenryIVth It doesn't really happen as much lately but especially in the 90s there was a lot of advertising for "gross" things to appeal to kids.

[@disposable_income_andy]

@@grim66 that and, for some reason, toy companies are STILL trying to push gross-out shit with stuff like grosserie gang where half the characters are actual fecal funny. there's countless different ones by different brands but they're all the same, all somehow have like 500 different little rubber characters and they never get past series 4.

[@kingkebo3960]

Jerma acting like he’s never eaten Peanut Blooder before

[@Squilly4]

this is a great pun

[@antares____]

Professional Las Vegas E-Clown makes plenty of Bostonian Pizza for the masses. Throws them outta the window.

[@vsaucenou323]

“E-Clown”? I like it.

[@ByobCraft]

Your comment is the best thing I've read in months

[@antares____]

​@@ByobCraft Glad to hear so! Hope next year is filled with more, even funnier comments for you!

[@cheetoschrist5685]

Fuck it. Jerma is an e-clown from now on, and he's gonna be reffered to as such

[@sinmonsworul]

the way this comment is presented makes me feel like i'm getting the scoop on a hit from my buddy in the mob

[@KeesekuchenLP]

why did they not include the full clip of him reading "serve it through the window", throwing the pizza out of the window, turning around and just looking at the actual serving window.

[@MattyMatthew-m4o]

I love how every streamer that plays this reads "serving window" and immediately proceeds to yeet the first pizza out the actual window

[@helix5729]

28:44 "Multiple piss wounds..." What the fuck is a piss wound.

[@zeeko6836]

Indeed the question of the hour

[@Bigman048]

You wanna find out?

[@3BrainCells3]

Watch out man bushbear games is gonna give you some piss wounds

[@BudBonkerson]

28 piss wounds

[@Chubbajawa]

Piss Pressure Cutter

[@afeathereddinosaur]

This stream was crazy, Jerma may have lost his scarce sanity twice

[@AlexSwePR]

so just an average stream then

[@prezzo4991]

His height is only *dwarfed* by his lack of sanity

[@Grapefruit5000]

@@prezzo4991 god damn I love this community

[@pixlv6384]

He never had any

[@Senthain]

Real tipping point was the grilled-cheese feetza

[@Zoochiini]

Watching him toss the pizza out the window is the most depressing thing I’ve ever seen in my life. Never in my life have I become so genuinely sad about this man and his capabilities

[@ShakedownDreams]

Vinny did it too

[@aaronn2954]

I like how he thinks the CEO of Coca-Cola’s last name is also Coca-Cola.

[@funnyvalentine4691]

John Coca-Cola

[@bananabuns1369]

i'm from georgia, his last name is coca-cola, dont let anyone else tell you, they're lying.

[@shadysam7161]

@@bananabuns1369 you must be from the state of georgia in the country of georgia, of course.

[@redumulis2448]

YeAH, its like Mr. John Masterchief, or Sand Undertale.

[@rurathn5534]

Just like the guy from Apple, Tim Apple

[@dr.techno2116]

"Do not mix gas into the mixer" Slight pause "Not now" The cycle repeats itself

[@DBWendy]

GAS

[@chrisshew15]

*cheeky smile* “Pizza Time.”

[@ElectricalSwift]

*looks at clock* "ya late"

[@MysteriousStrangerVA]

“I’m not payin’ for those.”

[@somecitrus7561]

Gimme another chance!

[@chimerschang]

You're fired.

[@gordonf5553]

*screaming*

[@pillgrimm]

Both vinny and jerma threw their tutorial pizzas out the window.

[@JARGUN145]

Because the client outside needed their pizza : )

[@yeah4710]

They did it because they are the same people

[@monke_mojo]

Think about it. Have you ever seen the two of them in the same room?

[@Grapefruit5000]

Let that sink.

[@yeah4710]

@@Grapefruit5000 no thank you, after my episode of the quick sand I haven't been the same since

[@kiryee]

“order up!” *this one’s for the seagulls*

[@mrfatmanguylel1326]

*GOD* ⁱ ʷⁱˢʰ i was the salami guy

[@aidanmueller9747]

I commend you on delivering the tone of your voice so well with the stylistic choice lmao

[@Sigh95]

“Hey honey! The salami guy’s here to see you!”

[@TheeOK1]

God I wish that were me jokes and jermas confused reactions to the jokes will always be funny to me.

[@p1tz0n16]

out of the whole 29:49 minute video of making pizzas we only saw him deliver 1 pizza, amazing work.

[@shoggothsatemyicecreamtruc2561]

Love how no matter what genre of game it is Jerma will always find a way to have a mental breakdown

[@george_jayne]

I don't think a more perfect opening could have been used, especially with "you're late"

[@sdawso_]

true italians eat pizza straight off the ground

[@ALE199-ita]

As an Italian, I can confirm.

[@cooldud7071]

im not italian but I've eaten pizza out of the trash before does this make me honorary

[@misomoistt4848]

They do try to make it as organic as possible

[@pagapollo5601]

that's because the ground in Italy is made of pizza

[@dragoncat9153]

Right from the plant

[@ineverwatched8118]

Him singing the raid song only to find out the chat lied has such perfect comedic timing.

[@Xzeihoranth]

This game has the right amount of content and jank to make Jerma just dissolve into hysterics.

[@weir-t7y]

He cross contaminated his entire kitchen I will never ever eat anything he makes

[@halolime117]

who cares

[@MyHeadHz]

@@halolime117 health inspector searchoverload8 from the county office

[@weir-t7y]

@@halolime117 A lot more people than whoever still cares about laser disc LMAO

[@weir-t7y]

@@MyHeadHz Yes

[@laserdisc2607]

@@weir-t7y come on man

[@TurbopropPuppy]

"I like my marinara sauce to be very much under the cheese, by the way. I like the cheese to be really, sort of, on top of the marinara sauce." actual psychopath

[@BlumenCT]

Can't tell if it's a stealth insult to deep dish or if he's just that crazy

[@kielbasamage]

Isn't that... how it works?

[@hotgamerboy6240]

@Tom The Terrible that isnt anime?

[@morosforhire4544]

Isn’t that how a normal pizza is supposed to be?

[@cppin]

21:29 there are 2.2 kilograms of cheddar slices on a single pizza.

[@EllRonnExclamationPoint]

Extra extra cheesy

[@shinysilverstardust]

Lactose intolerance pizza

[@LordEptar]

I was literally in tears the entire time after the debt was brought up, those pizzas he made in a rush were the most horrendous and disgusting things I've ever seen food-wise.

[@mmgmagic]

23:41 Listen, I know it's generic to compare Jerma to Scout from TF2, but that's literally him say "Ugh, frickin' unbelievable!"

[@tovarischshashlikov]

Holy shit you're right

[@ballpad9124]

“Make the pizza talk” “No I can’t make it talk” *makes it talk*

[@disposable_income_andy]

heeyyHEY KIDS

[@scribeslendy595]

I remember going to a wedding reception when I was in highschool and they had Whataburger catering part of the reception, it was great. Just stacks of cheeseburgers for me to tear up

[@1989TS..]

Love how the first thing jerma wants to do in a cooking simulator is climb out the window

[@minmcmarkemterm9109]

I sighed so hard when I read the description.

[@32piroman]

I didnt expect that...

[@gregslist.criminal4245]

Call Carson?

[@troublewakingup]

@@gregslist.criminal4245 yeah, carson would know what to do.

[@MickMod]

Well how will it get a job now?

[@seriousgamer2577]

18:28 this is basically the lord of the rings

[@Eveoriginalsinner]

lmao

[@munchmongoose]

Holy shit that’s perfect

[@abhorrentabsconder]

jej

[@carcinogenecist2054]

7:24 Chat: You have to do the (cat puking) noise now Jerma: Nah I cant I *proceeds to do it anyways*

[@Goldino]

21:21 "If you walked in here and you saw the person that was doing this doing this" -Jerma

[@waffleless]

I would never be able to play this game. The ease with which the plates break would have me smashing plates irl.

[@Soulraven2735]

Good news, there's a perk to make sure they don't break

[@mythcat1273]

-gets mad because he broke two bottles of oil -slightly overpours oil -gets unfathomably angry -throws oil at wall, intentionally breaking it

[@thekingofscrump]

“Hey Jerma Fratelli! Can I get one of your finest pep-pep-pepperoni pizzas!” “Chatjin I swear to god”

[@thefrub]

2:52 The editor messed up, they cut off the part where Jerma turns left and sees the serving window and goes AH SHIT

[@aka_miso]

First he talks about wanting only basic pizza then he make his sauce that's would probably make people projectile vomit like him and Kim after the echo cooler video

[@Sheridan2LT]

lmao Jesus fuckin Christ you right Here's my pizza type: capricciosa. No bullshit, no fucking pineapple

[@shallabim912]

@@Sheridan2LT pineapple is fine on pizza

[@conkfunky6760]

@Brokkr PINEAPPLE IS GOOD ON PIZZA, YOU JUST HAVE BAD TASTE

[@beepboop8751]

@Brokkr I think you might have the palette of a four year old.

[@Sheridan2LT]

@Brokkr hahaha calm down, you're right though. It's like adding chocolate or strawberry on pizza. Why tf

[@f1l603]

should've kept the uncut version of jerma tossing the pizza out of the window

[@Sammie1053]

Oh my fucking god we're less than three minutes in and I already can't breathe. Absolute madman made a pizza and then threw it out of a regular window

[@PoisedSilverWolf]

the first pizza going out the window after its painstaking creation was the funniest thing I have ever seen

[@shoebill13]

working at a pizza place myself I can confirm, that is pizza

[@Mr_Spaghetti]

This is basically a Cooking Simulator, but you’re the Hulk

[@nobodyimportant4778]

It sure has been hard for chefs ever since glass plates were banned and replaced with 1/8" hardened sugar plates

[@LazyLaw-]

Didn’t think I’d laugh this much to a pizza simulator video

[@ndzhelin2651]

why would you edit out one of the best parts at the start, where he genuinely believed that it had to be served out of the window to the outside and that is why he threw it out there. then perfectly turned to see the serving window in confusion. it's like the clips have been edited out of order to tell the same joke but less naturally

[@cowtastic141]

2:44

[@maximem7600]

26:04 Jerma invented the bush pizza.

[@jacobswift1512]

MULTIPLE piss wounds

[@couchmaster3773]

*28 PISS WOUNDS*

[@gilbeegee5386]

I like when he said he can’t make the noise now, but then gave the microphone the Gluck Gluck 3000

[@Harpoonthrower]

Recovering from Pulmonary embolism and this vid almost sent me back to the hospital from how hard I was laughing. What a perfect game for Jerma

[@yukonhyena2957]

i hope youre doing well, get well soon!

[@Harpoonthrower]

@@yukonhyena2957 doing much better thanks! 10/10 would suffer the pain again.

[@siegfriedhiryu4660]

@@Harpoonthrower Birds of a feather haha, been receiving chemo while watching Jerma streams. Boy do they help. Hope you're doing much better now!

[@zyriantel9601]

@@siegfriedhiryu4660 Cheers to being repeatedly punched in the gut by a medicine cocktail, hope you get through alright!

[@SwizzleDrizzl]

@@siegfriedhiryu4660 hey thought id check in! hows chemo doing? you ok?

[@thegibbehhh9430]

I was there for this stream - holy shit both Jerma AND chat were out of their minds.

[@wumb]

17:03 great sound

[@3gumi]

listen to the crunch!

[@LukeBeadles]

*crunch* ... *spitting*

[@gluemissile8145]

10:35 that pizza scoop type beat though

[@cbayer5012]

He's right about the light pizza thing. Especially with a thin crust, lightness is important.

[@draikken_]

Jerma's too weak to pick up a slice with more than 2 toppings

[@cbayer5012]

@@draikken_ he can only eat personal pizzas and even then at his size it's a struggle

[@link11913]

I prefer deep dish.

[@mildryfrr9970]

Heavy pizzas are superior.

[@cbayer5012]

@@mildryfrr9970 you're wrong

[@cassidy1730]

“bird shit pizza” fucking broke me

[@seahorsemafia]

The “bird shit pizza” kids menu thing he mentions, isn’t that more of a 90’s thing if I remember correctly? Back when Nickelodeon was in peak slime days

[@IOwnKazakhstan]

Never thought I'd hear Jerma say "multiple piss wounds" but here we are.

[@HotWings728]

the compressed trumpet gymnopedie no 1..... that cant possibly be in game its too funny.....

[@adonivan_]

Everyone insults Jermas favorite pizza, but hey, who doesn't love a tasty classic flat crust pepperoni.

[@mediocregaming17]

8:40 T-that's not Italian music... That's French. It's Gymnopedie by Satie.

[@XwarslayerXmemechannel]

2:50 Place it on a plate and YEET IT OUT THE WINDOW

[@HuemanBean]

Local clown opens pizza parlor for roughly 30 minutes

[@canismori]

Aggression depression caused by an Impression regression.

[@Shepfax]

18:49 pizza fetishist caught in the act

[@BlumenCT]

Hearing Jerma talk about any food in general is astoundingly painful he is not a worldly man

[@Dirkhandsome12]

NA palate

[@MrDrCthulhu]

I can't believe I've been barred from Jerma's wedding.

[@Chook181]

When Jerma does one of those gasps, like at 23:24, you know something good is coming

[@poyloos4834]

I want a compilation of Jerma doing the “voice.” You know when tech voice I’m talking about

[@jjontteri]

13:52 For some stupid reason that part made me laugh so hard I almost suffocated.

[@pingky]

Today on Sauce Lab, we put Pitzman's Mustard on our pizza. What the heck!

[@BudBonkerson]

"I don't like to keep a clean kitchen."

[@alexfirefox9807]

As an Italian man who once made pizzas for a living, this video hurts the very core of my being.

[@Dirkhandsome12]

As someone who also worked at a very popular Italian restaurant I can confirm I've had work nightmares that weren't this chaotic

[@IIIllllIIIIlllll]

Because he’s a natural epicurean genius with so little practice?

[@theterribleanimator1793]

You dont throw pizzas out the window to your customers?

[@funx24X7]

Glad our favorite streamer graduated from floor soup to floor pizza

[@totalgarbage2053]

I like how he did a full 10 minute bit of making his perfect pizza just to throw it out the window

[@aidanrgcool]

I remember playing the early beta of this game at school with my friends, I was really bad at it

[@firstlast6437]

Papas pizzeria

[@MyHeadHz]

Pizza with more than two toppings too heavy local streamer says

[@Nomadsword]

God, this is my real job, I can't imagine doing it as a game job

[@DragonTamer31K]

Is nobody gonna mention his amazing cat puking sound

[@juzington]

My favorite pizza is also a burnt charcoal dish with nothing on it cooked in an oven that is so hot it burns my home down.

[@PaintraSeaPea]

Wealthy Vegas child chef leaves pizza on windowsill, tries to pass it off as new recipe after seagulls defecate on it

[@pianosnake7028]

This might be one of my favorite Jerma streams. It lies really close to the Coin Game stream

[@gemizu4874]

Jerma complaining about the game mechanics while continuously abusing them and breaking all the plates on purpose is such a power move.

[@Gothorlagee]

NOBODY had used the words "bird" "shit" and "pizza" in the same context Jerma did until this stream.

[@Ryusuta]

26:43 - Okay, believe it or not, in the mid-1990s, McDonald's pizza was ACTUALLY A THING. I am not kidding you in the slightest - there were McDonald's locations that legitimately made pizza. You can actually Google image search for the boxes. From what I remember, they were actually a tiny bit better than you might think.

[@TheOblomoff]

Favourite pizza - everything pizza. Anchovi, ham, pineapple, concrete, diamonds... Everything pizza.

[@Chillco600]

jerma is like that one kid that you sleep over with and then when you are eating he picks the most picky and plain things in the fridge

[@lainawesome]

How does he do it? Jerma is like the funniest person alive or something lol. Also, lol the description

[@conkfunky6760]

he makes a new worst sound every stream

[@williamglass2223]

I just got a Little Caesar’s ad at the end of the video, and it was for a thin crust with pepperoni.

[@killanelle]

jerma breaking 4 plates in a row had me in actual tears

[@QMan1234red]

Some of you didn’t have Bird Shit Pizza as a kid and it *SHOWS*

[@GabrielAKAFinn]

"Italy pizza is shit" - People who eat pepperoni

[@ccda3324]

Bostonians/New Yorkers who eat sliced bread with ketchup and a slice of Kraft cheese and call it "pizza" in a nutshell

[@funx24X7]

I've never refunded a game before cooking simulator. The physics are too damn frustrating, I'll wait for it on VR.

[@studhouser6969]

Imagine getting frustrated at the physics in a game and then expecting the VR version to be better lmao

[@funx24X7]

@@studhouser6969 Most of my issues stemmed from the poor controls so yes, I think the fidelity of VR would help. If they made absolutely zero changes to the engine for VR then I’m sure it’d be just as terrible but I’m basing my expectations off the cooking portion of Job Simulator which was great.

[@Greystar2426]

Jerma pulled a Haachama by tossing the pizza straight out the window lmao

[@43Jodo]

MANIAC streamer THROWS BOTTLES while DEMANDING his favorite pizza