Absolute Mad Lads - The Dogmeat General, Zhang Zongchang

Install Raid for Free ✅ IOS: bit.ly/2Oyf2Qb ✅ ANDROID: bit.ly/2YhAygp Start with💰50K silver and get a Free Epic Champion 💥 on day 7 of “New Player Rewards” program
=====
LINKS
=====
PayPal Donations : www.paypal.me/...
Patreon : / countdankula
Subscribestar : www.subscribes...
Merch : teespring.com/...
Watch My Streams On DLive : dlive.tv/Count...
Streamlabs Donations : streamlabs.com...
BitCoin : 18Kgfgpd1PqSiyaxdWzvz3jLaBPYeKDSyL
Subscribe to our Podcast - The Incredible Salt Mine :
/ @theincrediblesaltmine
2nd Channel : / @countdankula2
Stream Archive Channel : / @countdankulastreams
Twitch : / countdankulatv
Twitter : / countdankulatv
Twitch : / countdankulatv
Discord : bit.ly/Dankulas...
Minds : www.minds.com/...
Normiebook : / countdankulatv
Snapchat : countdankulatv
PO BOX 19096
MOTHERWELL
ML1 9ES
Theme Song by Tailed Feature - • Count Dankula's MAD LA...
==============

[@CountDankula]

Install Raid for Free ✅ IOS: bit.ly/2Oyf2Qb ✅ ANDROID: bit.ly/2YhAygp Start with💰50K silver and get a Free Epic Champion 💥 on day 7 of “New Player Rewards” program

[@HopperHopsGaming1st]

Ey

[@NillocsKeep]

Get outta here ya shill, lol

[@SashaTriple6]

STOP YELLING

[@Chazzs]

GAY

[@wardjunior1450]

Count Dankula no

[@utes5532]

>assassinating royalty 150 dollar fine >teaching your dog a trick 900+ dollar fine

[@evangeline77x]

But you didn't account for inflation...

[@fire9042]

teaching a dog a trick in china is like playing with your food

[@isaaclemmen6500]

@@evangeline77x $150 during the founding of the federal reserve in 1913, would be $3,880.95 now.

[@Shruggernauts]

Settles it, Dankula needs to move to Japan.

[@WorthlessWinner]

admittedly, it was deposed royalty

[@jonfroswa]

15:08 "He chose to pay the fine" *Smart man. Now come along with us. We'll confiscate any stolen goods and you'll be free to go.*

[@Siegetower]

I was once a youtuber like you. But then I took an arrow to the knee.

[@romanboi8834]

@@Siegetower how about a more updated version, *I used to be a KZbinr like you, then I took demonitization to my channel*

[@Drak976]

@Divine Lord of Shitpost *Just Working Intensifies*

[@ctrip6668]

Two words. Sweetroll....

[@StarboyXL9]

"Yesterday a boy called me dad. I have no idea who his mother is." Based Warlord problems

[@radioactiverat8751]

Suffering from success

[@jernie9384]

Tfw when no cute Peasant concubine to fuck while her mans warring for you

[@luisitocomunista546]

Oggy a man of culture, I see

[@Krakkokayne]

Savage xD

[@whymypeepeehard7016]

she call me daddy ion even know her mama - blueface

[@stagbeetle1050]

"I'll destroy your temple then have cannons bombard your mom" This one quote is more powerful than over 5000 years of western and Asian poetry combined

[@gabrielwhite3890]

a lot of people who are also Chinese like me are fooled into thinking poets like Li Bai are the best the country has seen, but Zhang poet master has the best lyricism and word play amongst the mere mortals that attempt to dethrone him

[@gavin1761]

stag beetle little did they know. they were ahead of call of duty

[@Deadassbruhfrfr]

OG shitposter for sure

[@yeetimusexe]

“Mom”

[@amarimacd12]

W

[@seancestnik]

Zongchang: can’t be bothered to remember the names of his concubines so he numbers them *still doesn’t know how many there are*

[@Masterchief0521]

to be fair, that one running off with an Officer really fucked the system

[@parth88226]

Truly progressive

[@telephonebear21]

@@Masterchief0521 was her number retired, or did the next one get her number (thus throwing out the order)?

[@xXDarkxIdealsXx]

LIttle known story. This is the basis for why Hotels don't have 13th floors/rooms. Cuz #13 left with Zongchang's officer so he only had concubine room #12 and #14 booked at the hotel. (Of course he booked out the entirety of the rest of the hotel with his other 348 thot patrol members but i digress)

[@thatsmuggamer]

@@xXDarkxIdealsXx I thought it was because 13 was unlucky

[@raymondjames57]

He was progressive, He was a shitposter, He valued his mother, & he was a warlord. Absolute mad lad 😂

[@scotchedtape]

"As long as you're not angry" Lmfao "I though something was wrong and you were punching walls" What a sweetheart.

[@kepone3121]

probably didnt want him to go from punching walls to punching her

[@BST-ri6gf]

Zongchang adopted a Scottish accent while he was in Japan

[@InconvenienceTV]

Judging by the poetry, Zhang was a Soundcloud rapper.

[@BrianTDurden]

yeah he missed his calling

[@godemperortrump6932]

They have a thing for becoming warlords apparently

[@longyu9336]

@@godemperortrump6932 Zhang Zongchang>>>>>>>Raz Simone

[@generalmarkmilleyisbenedic8895]

@@godemperortrump6932they cant even speak english or civilize, the sure as shit cant be a general lol

[@via45]

“I will win, and if not I will return in a coffin” *Loses * returns parading through the town alive in a coffin” 😂

[@CardboardSliver]

Troll level: 1000000000

[@TheZombieburner]

No joke, at that exact moment in the video, I said aloud "I like this guy!"

[@RuiLuz]

LOL! Mad Lad Troll Material

[@gangganguwu6219]

Smoking a cigar aswell!

[@HazyJ12]

Pulled a sneaky on ya.

[@trevanminnig3499]

“They were in love” ‘And then he killed them’ “He actually let them marry” ‘Oh, THEN he killed them’ *continues on with story* ‘Wait, he just let them fall in love and get married?? Wow... lot of respect I guess

[@carlosfred8673]

It's like a fucked up fairy tale. Or a German one at least.

[@TrollHiddenCave]

Germans make the best fairy tales

[@justicewarrior9187]

@@TrollHiddenCave They surely make one of the best Bukkake Porn!! Right after Japanese I mean 😀

[@TrollHiddenCave]

@@justicewarrior9187 lol

[@nondescriptstraightwhitema6138]

Wages war like a boss and accepts the honour of love. Sure good sir.

[@MiniMight]

"i don't even know his mother" H E C A L L M E D A D D Y I D O N T E V E N K N O W H I S M O M M A

[@long-hair-dont-care88.]

Happens to the best of us.

[@mike1000232]

By god, I have never heard anything as glorious as a Scotsman trying to pronounce Chinese names

[@DieFlabbergast]

I speak Chinese, and I can tell you there wasn't much wrong with his pronunciation (apart from the lack of tones, which would happen with everybody unless they can speak Chinese).

[@doomermeme9975]

@@DieFlabbergast late reply but isnt chinese based on the tone of how things are said? Kind of like how emphasis on words mean different things (I didn't SAY that or i didnt say THAT) a change of volumne and tone like sarcasm?

[@bakucool]

@@DieFlabbergast are you sure? He pronounced zh as z.

[@bakucool]

@S billings hilarious mate

[@nomine4027]

It's pretty epic. Spending all that time with my family from Glasgow has finally come in handy, lol.

[@kuri5332]

reading those 100 year old "poems" feels like reading a 14yos twitter timeline

[@holderheck]

Just goes to show you that our culture and Technology advances not people

[@mykillmielia]

Speaking of soph?

[@dustinchen]

@@holderheck experience vs no life experience son

[@holderheck]

@@dustinchen I think you missed what I was getting at woosh. Unless you're claiming the warlord had no life experience?

[@thekamotodragon]

and to think that this man, according to genetics, would be considered the pinnacle of a male for our species, because of the amount of mates he had that were attracted to him and had to spread his genes with, absolutely fantastic stuff lol.

[@Nassuklovni]

The dude took his own mother to battlefields, to show her how good of a warlord he was. At the same time he kept a platoon of whores and treated them like toilet paper. There maybe were some mommy-issues and not enough hugs received as a child.

[@prestonjones1653]

Well he was Asian.

[@generalmarkmilleyisbenedic8895]

But would he have listened to her counsel as much if he didnt like her?

[@drewwalton5973]

@@generalmarkmilleyisbenedic8895 Doesn’t mean he didn’t like her. Being neglected can very easily lead you to be striving for their approval later in life

[@ShadowAkatora]

**WARLORD CHINA TOUR 1923** -Changdong -Shanghai -Shenyang -Nanjing -Chongqing -Szechuan

[@ranchurdhimster4955]

-Sauce

[@ctrip6668]

-Orange chicken -Beef and Broccoli -Crab Rangoon

[@pizza-for-mountains]

@@ctrip6668 I told you to stay put and enjoy the crab rangoon

[@ctrip6668]

@@pizza-for-mountains"So you must be the second guy, who didn't listen, and decided to join the other monkeys and start throwing his shit around..."

[@nickwalker4936]

There’s already Zongchang memes flooding the internet. Godspeed, Count.

[@snorungar70]

Nick The Undying yepp! spread it!

[@6ucket]

After the Uday mad lad, 6:02 practically makes him look like a saint

[@TESkyrimizer]

In truth I think even most men of power would see that as a matter of respect and execute them both out of principle. Zongzhang isn't just a good person compared to Uday Id say he's a good person compared to 95% of people with power.

[@purpandorange]

This is what shitposters used to be before the computer gave us an outlet to do our shitposting on and no longer did we have to wage endless war just to meme on some statues.

[@derriduresique5627]

How depressing that the modern day shitlord has fallen so far.

[@fartcriminals9623]

What a great lineage warlords to memers

[@stu2729]

This will be my new go-to insult. "I´ll have canons bombard your mum".

[@chickenbouilloncube7038]

two “n”s, pal

[@tamask7749]

@@chickenbouilloncube7038 NNIGGA PLZ

[@LSPD1909]

Chicken BouillonCube NNIGGA PLZ

[@nxxynx5039]

@@chickenbouilloncube7038 nah those printers are heavy as shit

[@stu2729]

@@chickenbouilloncube7038 my bad, not my native language. I´m from germany so I only understand arabic.

[@reue1575]

On, Zhang Zongchang, from the Autobiography of Pu Yi, last Emperor of China. "This universally detested monster was a welcome visitor to the Chang Garden and a man in whom I placed the greatest hopes. When I lived in the Northern Mansion in Peking Chang Tsung-chang (zhang) had come in disguise to visit me and show his concern for me. After I moved to Tientsin he would come and see me whenever he was in the city. His visits were always in the middle of the night as he slept by day and smoked opium in the evening, after which he was in very good spirits and would talk for hours about anything."

[@pedrop218]

Basically a Chinese Joe Rogan

[@oz_jones]

@@pedrop218 Cho Lo-Gan?

[@longyu9336]

The Virgin Pu Yi: Either impotent or gay No children Wife hated him and had an affair Forced his wife to abort her child, almost drove her to suicide Wife almost died to Opium addiction Probably short dick Lived his entire life as a puppet of the Japanese Himself universally detested Literally born with a golden spoon in hand Was brought up and surrounded by literal castrated eunuchs Ordered eunuchs, men without testicles, to be cruelly flogged everyday as child Complained like a virgin about Eunuchs stealing stuff from his palace Lost the mandate of heaven of the Qing-Dynasty and the Aisin-Gioro Clan vs the Chad Zhang Zongchang Doesn't even know which of his children was born to what woman anymore Had a whole harem of women from all four directions, despite numbering them doesn't even know how many he had exactly Permitted an officer to marry the concubine after discovering the affair, what a generous chad Smoked -weed- Opium everyday, still full of energy Massive shlong was as long as 86 silver dollars stacked on top of each other "can make a Japan sized whale shut up" according to his legendary poems Archieved international acclaim as "China's -basest- most based Warlord" (the Times), enjoyed admiration and loyalty from his subordinates A lowborn peasant, fought for his status himself and came out on top as gangster, gangleader and finally warlord of Shandong Grew up as peasant with a tough childhood, brought up and surrounded by brad gangsters and chad soldiers. "Accidentally" shot the cousin of Puyi, an important japanese puppet/figurehead on a visit in fkn Japan, whilst "cleaning his rifle", they only dared to fine him 150 bucks-->Can truly make a Japan-sized whale shut up Doesn't even know how much money he had Even the Gods feared him, threatened to fuck the sister of the god of rain, blasted the sky with artillery fire and bitchslapped the statue of the god inside the temple-->The next day, the drought which claimed many lives abruptly ended and it started raining

[@miguelpadeiro762]

​@@pedrop218Tbh China must have had no shortage of Joe Rogans with the general chaos and Opium epidemic that were the signature of this period of Chinese history

[@kitchenjail3546]

Dude managed to convince a God to give him rain with the sheer power or slaps, 4th grader level insults and artillery. Just. Wow.

[@takafumiarisawa70]

What else would you do if they're bombarding your mom. And you wouldn't believe what he did to get the anti-STD spell.

[@GIN.356.A]

I know this is a 4 year old comment, but I just wanna add that slaps, 4th grader insults, and artillery, can pretty much solve any problems in life 😂😂😂

[@generalmarkmilleyisbenedic8895]

@@GIN.356.Aafter 4 years i can confirm

[@SpectralUmbreon197]

Mostly every sane person: “Guns don’t kill people. People kill people.” Zhang ZongChang: *”Well yes, but actually no.”*

[@Nevir202]

LMFAO, massively underrated comment. 🤣

[@therunningman1]

It's actually "almost. All-most."

[@richardsolomon5375]

@@bantika6972 so do hammers, knives, CARS!!, marriage, and junk food. We should outlaw all of those!

[@exine5349]

@@richardsolomon5375 Hammers purpose is to hammer stuff, cars are meant to transport, marriage is well...might as well have said murder, junk food just requires eating in moderation(very little of usually.) Guns are meant to kill

[@cavscout7113]

Actually guns are meant to shoot .....Not kill

[@awaister]

Zhang Zongchang seems like a nice guy after watching Madlad Uday Hussein

[@fillosof66689]

As far as warlords go, he was better than okay. Turns out all you need is to not go on random murder/torture/rape sprees.

[@TESkyrimizer]

@@fillosof66689 bruh honestly that sounds like such a simple non-issue and yet it is such an issue with most warlords Its quite possible that zongzhang had a good eye for picking men he could trust and had very few internal conflicts

[@daltonharmon1018]

I dont think anyone is quite as bad as him not even vlad the impaler who literally tortured people by having their feet skin licked off by goats

[@mjtechnoviking44]

@@daltonharmon1018 vlad also the reason you speak English and not Arabic.

[@daltonharmon1018]

@@mjtechnoviking44 to be fair english has caused a lot of historical harm when you think about it. It's even killed off a lot of now dead languages even so... Uday was a bastard to say the least

[@PotWeedKush]

Can I just say that Vlad The Impaler is the original shitposter.

[@daneoconnor6457]

More of a postuptheshitter

[@yungsaika3438]

Shitter-Poster

[@dantebanducci235]

Like when the Turkish emissary wouldn’t remove his turban, so he had it nailed to his head.

[@simonpeter5032]

Caligula before him

[@farkasmactavish]

He did stick posts up people's shitters, yes.

[@vapelord_vixen7828]

“I’ll destroy your temple then I’ll have cannons bombard your mom.” What a legend...

[@GokantheHusky]

You are bad with music

[@GonzoIV]

MUM*

[@lowqualitystockimage.mp4643]

furry

[@PowerSpirit50]

@@halomaster515 The rest of the world learns British English so we outnumber you.

[@halomaster515]

@@PowerSpirit50 I'm from London I was taking the piss

[@haroldthaf]

You'd be surprised how many people go around cleaning their rifles. WW2 was basically a mass rifle cleaning event. STAHP

[@StandingTNT]

With some accidentall shots...

[@suspicioususer]

But they don't them while loaded

[@ma_na_gurab]

also dont forget to take your atomic bomb to a walk in japan

[@Strelok10]

@@ma_na_gurab Mmyes, The Expanse references. Cheers.

[@thephoenixempyre2300]

Dankula: I'M ABOUT TO DO DRUGS AND BANG HOOKERS! The Gf: Well, at least you're not angry... The best relationship

[@stephen5857]

Lux Aeterna I think you mean wiafu

[@LongDingus]

@@stephen5857 shut the fuck up you god damn weeb

[@goblinteehee]

@@LongDingus They are married you maluable gremlin

[@LongDingus]

@@goblinteehee we know?

[@He-who-wakes]

Bunch of wee cunts

[@harveyweinstein349]

There really needs to be a movie or mini series made about this guy. Opportunity for incredible satirical comedy as well

[@deltoroperdedor3166]

There might be in Chinese. I'm leaving this comment here for future references

[@GonzoIV]

Fuck yeah, something like "the death of Stalin" which is fucking amazing

[@dwarfchicken]

🤔

[@GH-xt5df]

Like the movie Aladeen!

[@generalmarkmilleyisbenedic8895]

@@GH-xt5dfno. That guys a demon

[@condescendingjerkwad8346]

"I will destroy your temple and have cannons bombard your mother." -- Zhang Zhongchang.

[@Lakefront_Khan]

Your wife is trooper AND adorable, good shit man.

[@Kolajer]

Sue is an absolute bliss of a lass

[@jordanrodgers9737]

Sue is great, but could we get subtitles for her maybe?

[@Mark-cd3sy]

A*

[@spiritupgrades]

Electronic Corgi I can’t wait for the mad lad vid on the Countess

[@mishamazureka3486]

Absolute Mad Lads: Steve, That Bloke What Lives Across The Street From Me and Has Four Pitbulls

[@uremawifenowdave]

You mean Steve, that really nice guy that lives across the road, NO STEVE PLEASE DON’T USE THOSE PLIARS ON MY SCROTUM!

[@gaydubbbz8148]

"the sky god is also named zhang, why does he make life hard for me ? if it doesn' t rain in 3 days i' ll destroy your temple then i' ll have canons bombard your mom" -zhang zongchang greatest poete of the 19th century

[@oz_jones]

*20th. He died in 1932.

[@aurexify]

My man thinks we're living in the 20th century

[@oz_jones]

@@aurexify we arent.

[@aurexify]

@@oz_jones Wow no shit Captain Obvious I couldn't tell

[@JamesOrthodoxOfficial]

​@@aurexifyDude fr is onto something

[@dagdamor1]

As a proud Chinese American, I heartily endorse the screensavers on your background monitors.

[@HiddenEvilStudios]

Definitely am now an american citizen! *GOD BLESS THE ALLEGIANCE FLAG!*

[@Ab-ox7mo]

yeah the chinese love that panda with the face

[@TheBelovedDisciple144]

That makes you a bonafide White Supremist! Congratulations!

[@angsern8455]

dagdamor1 you dare talk to your Father this way?

[@excitableboy7031]

What does the panda one say tho

[@TheComedyButchers]

Waiting for an Absolute MadLads on Theodore Roosevelt

[@AragornRespecter]

best President of all time

[@rustyshackleford6906]

I have been suggesting the bull moose for a while too

[@lucastark1784]

That man was based beyond comprehension.

[@Anthony-yz8dn]

Phil Ill He died of Polio lmao

[@lorgarbeareroftheword5836]

Nobunaga Oda is the way to go.

[@tacticool_weeb8450]

Whenever me and the bro’s get together “WARLORDS ON TURE “ shall be yelled

[@charlesdemers1197]

« YAAAS LADS! »

[@Erraddo]

He either was the best shitposter in history, or the most functional of mental cases...

[@thepatrioticspartan5854]

Why not both? Lol

[@iowaclass5657]

There’s a difference?

[@GnosticAtheist]

Both?

[@hallabalooza]

Absolute Mad Lads *John McAfee* when?

[@iandrsaurri625]

John McAfee is brilliant. It needs to be done or we riot

[@johnblackstone5261]

He is in DIRE NEED OF A MAD LADS EPISODE

[@lorgarbeareroftheword5836]

After Nobunaga Oda. Pass it along.

[@iandrsaurri625]

@Phil Ill It is irrelevant if he has been covered before. There is sm that has happened recently about McAfee no one else covered yet. Also Dank would give a brilliant take

[@will9788]

Yes this

[@Sen-115DK]

It should definitely be a movie. A War Comedy movie about the Dogmeat General. 10 out of 10 would watch.

[@fatloser6913]

I think there is a moive about him, its call the bitter tea of general yen

[@DatMetalBoi75]

Cast Ken Jeong as the dogmeat general for comedic purposes

[@generalmarkmilleyisbenedic8895]

@pattersonstopmotions1282nah only based chinaman there is

[@josh1200]

​@pattersonstopmotions1282 Everyone from history did horrible things. If that's all people focused on, they'd become depressed.

[@bigboibenjamin7094]

Absolute Mad Lads: Raid Shadow Legends

[@unherolike]

His story isnt over that Madlad said he was comming back some day.

[@thomasturner6980]

Count Dankula is the most reliable history source in the world

[@victorsavu]

and that's a fact

[@tastyloaf5487]

The more you know ⭐

[@Enkabard]

Its true, even wikipedia cites Dankula word by word

[@georgezikos8615]

I would like to recommend to you'Internet Historian'

[@lordmctheobalt]

let me introduce you to sabaton...

[@Sujjin21]

"As long as you're not angry.." She sounded so sweet too 😂🤣 got a keeper there

[@LukeHimself]

*The poetry! Oh god that poetry was top notch comedy!!!*

[@TheBelovedDisciple144]

Absolute Mad Lads: Alex Jones When?

[@TheChugg11]

That would be brilliant!

[@ponponpattapon]

The prophet himself

[@cruelchris3099]

when the time comes...

[@DarrynNightmare]

His story is not over....

[@nayrtnartsipacify]

Lizard penis rage!

[@dolphinboi-playmonsterranc9668]

"How should we go about this battle?" I think we should flank them from the river. I think we should rain mortars from above. I think everyone should get along and play nice. "Okay mommy, we'll begin peace proceedings."

[@achftw]

The fact that Raid sponsors you is almost enough to make me want to play it.

[@FrozenPhotonX_X]

How about an Absolute Mad Lads on Ned Kelly, the Australian Outlaw famous for wearing a suit of armor during a shootout with the cops?

[@lorgarbeareroftheword5836]

What kind of armor?

[@ea.fitz216]

Lorgar Bearer of the Word Kinda like a knight’s suit. Google a picture of it.

[@hugovasquez8222]

@@lorgarbeareroftheword5836 he forged weird Minecraft looking armor with a Buckethelmet fully armored except his legs (you can guess where he got shot at)

[@hugovasquez8222]

Please Not again... I know he would fit in the Format but ned Kelly is covered in sooooo many Videos. I rather Watch Mad lads about some dude ive Never heard of before.

[@dh-vc2yc]

@@hugovasquez8222 I've never heard of it but I'm not Australian so we don't really hear things about other countries

[@Vollification]

I can't stop watching this XD 2:56 "Are you implying that I'm a peasant?" "No, I'm implying that I'm a peasant and that I'm willing to shoulder any burden you place upon me." That is so metal. Everyone else surely gave the local warlord the most expensive gifts they could bring and Zhang Zongchang basically did a Churchill with his symbolism "I have nothing to offer but blood, toil, tears and sweat." How can you top that?

[@glorioustigereye]

Zhang: (Finds out about the affair.) Me: Oh God their gonna die. Zhang: (Lets them marry) Me: This is so heart warming and wholesome.

[@MauveGun]

*they're

[@CR0JAX]

@theprince on that one

[@TheMobiledoll]

*The

[@steeltuff1]

Mad lads don't have to be heartless.

[@gretashapiro4118]

He was still drilling her

[@lorgarbeareroftheword5836]

I vote "Nobunaga Oda" for madlad.

[@VioletDeathRei]

To be fair he was a genuinely competent leader and strategist, but very good at making enemies. (Not following you I swear lol, just actually agree it's a good choice.)

[@lorgarbeareroftheword5836]

@@VioletDeathRei Lol, what are the chances of all these meetings? Its a fun day on the internet. :)

[@stiankwaknyberg5297]

I counter that (literally) with "Yi Sun-shin".

[@IsraelLuisGeerRivera-ff4cg]

Lorgar Bearer of the Word invades your lands in CIV V and there's nothing you can do because samurais are OP.

[@shadowxgaming4247]

Oooh, why not do Cao Cao or some more Chinese warlords? There are quite a bit of Mad Lads in Romance of the Three Kingdoms.

[@athomicritics]

speaking of Russian Civil War and Mad Lads heres a good episode idea for you : BARON ROMAN VON UNGERN-STERNBERG AKA THE RUSSIAN GENGHIS KHAN

[@nomad7865]

Yes

[@koatam]

Isn't Genghis Khan the Russian Genghis Khan?

[@robincray116]

You forgot his best nickname "old 86" cause his member was 86 Mexican silver coins long.

[@theapexsurvivor9538]

Oh gods, it's true! That's glorious.

[@michaelkeha]

wait are they stacked on top of each other or laid end to end

[@theapexsurvivor9538]

@@michaelkeha stacked when flaccid, end to end when at full mast.

[@1207rorupar]

But how did they get Mexican silver coins?!

[@ZiiPerHeaD]

TheApexSurvivor imagine when he pitches his tent i’d be more like a log in mud

[@Unbeniamhable]

“I’d like to order a 23” “Extra t h i c c”

[@MosoKaiser]

*T* *H* *I* *C* *C*

[@0DarkTime0]

We saw the video... Thanks for repeating the exact lines from it..

[@happytrix6167]

@@0DarkTime0 smileW

[@Blurns]

I'd like a largeeeeee -WHAT

[@heinzarniaung2915]

More like *E X T R A T H E C C*

[@iankouf39]

"Warlords on tour" is what I'll be calling nights out with the boys from now on.

[@crematedchimera9122]

This is the earliest I've ever been. I appreciate the mystery over who the Mad Lad will be.

[@vegeta9501]

Welcome 😉

[@simonpeter5032]

Caligula

[@Cneqq]

swear dankula is holding back laughter that he has to do that stupid ad everytime lol

[@FixedFace]

plot twist: he plays the game three hours a day

[@tripp8957]

Honestly tho

[@arch3223]

You missed this spicy detail about Ol' Dogmeat. "A brutal man, Zhang was notorious for his hobby of splitting the skulls of prisoners with his sword, which he called "smashing melons". He loved to boast about the size of his penis, which become part of his legend. He was nicknamed "General Eighty-Six" as his penis when erect was said to measure up to a pile of 86 Mexican silver dollars."

[@kiabahjoe470]

“used his mother as a counsel” i feel this energy because i have this energy

[@bondfall0072]

A wise man once said "A boys best friend is his mother."

[@carsoncasmirri3874]

kiabah joe I mean shit. At least in domestic matters who best to ask counsel of than a homemaker and a mother

[@SirDankleberry]

Smart Zong.

[@gopherasoda2492]

Same

[@Exli3r]

Mum knows best

[@القناةالشاملة-ث5غ]

The number one best series ever

[@gyromurphy]

Inshallah.... Yes it is.

[@pauliewalnuts2527]

its rewatch ability is up there with avgn.

[@FrozenPhotonX_X]

Dankula's mustache on the right side is attached to his beard, but his left side isn't. *This annoys me to an unfathomable degree*

[@kariwilson-wade6050]

I wish I hadnt seen this comment, I cant stop looking at it🤦‍♀️🤣

[@zinnwolf1850]

fuck you now i cant unsee it

[@Garbagejuicewaterfall]

Your wretched curse has reeked havoc on this video

[@alesin1992]

FUCK YOU TAKE IT BACK

[@soakupthesunman]

It's hand made!

[@Benzinilinguine]

You're Scottish, you already pronounce everything wrong. Jk

[@x0thorn0x]

Benevolent best laugh all day, thanks mate.

[@tommccauley9269]

@Kade Cooper shite*

[@statelessmars]

You mean pronounces it even better if that’s possible

[@strikeralvares4372]

Good one man !

[@LSPD1909]

All you fuckers been done everything wrong unless your one of us from the great white north.

[@aarontbradley1]

I think this might be my favorite madlads so far lmao this dude was legendary LOL

[@aabcyyt]

Everyone: Murder Dankula: muhlrdah

[@C39SHARKDRAKE]

As a Scotsman yourself... HOW HAVE YOU NOT DONE A MAD LAD ON JOHN PAUL JONES??

[@gentileogoyim1114]

Steffan Ranasinghe he was a true mad lad

[@alanmilland3842]

I know, those guys in Led Zeppelin were true madlads

[@kappa7365]

The one from led zep?

[@streetxjammingdualxscreens9228]

indeed @@kappa7365

[@hazmatseventh6925]

No they meant the pirate in the revolutionary war

[@Madkent94]

You really need to do one of these for the Australian bush ranger "Ned Kelly" He built a suit of power armor out of farm equipment and a watering can and had a showdown with the cops. If that isn't mad, then I don't know what is.

[@userequaltoNull]

This is... Intriguing. Do this.

[@TheMidnightModder]

I would Absolutely love to see that

[@BigPuddin]

Apparently, he made his armor out of plow heads, and the cops thought he was the fucking devil when they couldn't kill him. They still have his armor in a museum somewhere.

[@Garthorium]

@@BigPuddin Ned Kelly funnily enough is the reason it's illegal to buy full suits of riot armour in Australia. Fully legal to purchase ex police gear/tactical gear, but not a complete suit. Also, his armour would either be in the Melbourne Museum or in NSW. They have tours that follow the Kelly trail to Glenrowan etc. They would have been invincible if the armour wasn't so cumbersome, and if they had made some for their arms and legs. Hence the police were able to gun them down.

[@PL4GU3d]

The Raddest Chad some were donated by supporters of the Kelly gang, but when you look into why he did what he did and why he was supported by many that’s what makes him even more fascinating, almost like the tale of the killdozer or billy the kid but Australian, the tales of Kelly are some that don’t get told enough here down under sometimes.

[@pikminman13]

Highly skilled Russian mercenaries? Sounds like they had some Heavies...

[@willworkforfood7028]

Their armoured trains where basically bunch of Heavies standing on the payload.

[@alexkaplan6581]

@@willworkforfood7028 hulong heater gang.

[@MozrowDrops]

POOOOOTIS DISPENSER ERE NOOOOOOOOOWWWW

[@LordDeathslayer]

@@willworkforfood7028 DUMB KART NOT POOSH SELF

[@DOOT_II]

_WHO TOUCHED MY GUN_

[@ashtonbrown17]

>getting a star made from Marlboro >not being excited about it

[@cobalt2361]

"he gets shot dead and instantly killed" -Count Dankula, 2019

[@jonasthemovie]

cobalT killed until he died?

[@unclekanethetiberiummain1994]

Didn't you know that people die when they are killed?

[@allisonanne571]

Lmfao he confronted the man who was having an affair with his concubine and just went “Well, you two really like each other, so okay. It’s cool.”

[@sharqueeshajohnalaneesha2019]

We should abolish taxation and crowdfund the government

[@PugMaxer]

Then billionaires run the government...

[@tristman8413]

@@PugMaxer like they don't already lol

[@bakpfeife2224]

@@PugMaxer Anonymous donors... and with billionares funding the government but everyone else voting it will have way less budget and thus way less functions which is kinda nice(It would have way more focus on protecting citizens assets though).

[@tastyloaf5487]

YES! Cut the fatcats and their yachts, lower taxes, people have greater income (less income taxation) and food and services are cheaper without taxation, allowing people to give more to the charities and public services THEY CHOOSE!

[@prinzeugenvansovoyen732]

@@tastyloaf5487 maybe crowdfound with the possibility for specific stuff like i want a tunnel or new train but give a realistic minimum yearly ammount like idk 300€

[@folioshmolio]

Who needs history class when we have absolute mad lads

[@pealopao3160]

That's how history should be teached.

[@inkedskindeep9941]

The poem about Bastards is definetly my favorite. Im sure he was pissed when he wrote it.

[@yochaiwyss3843]

He was always Pissed.

[@kaibotski4939]

Or mellow and high on opium.

[@kellmont0149]

Absolute Mad Lads : Francis Pegahmagabow AKA: The candian soldier who crawled into german trenches in WW1 just to watch them sleep

[@Ramsey276one]

JUST THAT? U SURE???

[@antigrav6004]

"All good pirates listen to their mom" -castle in the sky

[@YNWA-1888]

11:30 "well as long as you're no angry" she's a keeper 😅

[@Crypt0rkid]

Ahhhhh yeeeeeah. Getting ready to get autistic up in here.

[@justafellowbrother7263]

Hey fellow not gay Jared

[@brianpaap7046]

Noiceeee shirt

[@PoohhNani]

Lmao

[@Manhattan_project.420]

do one about the guy who lost a leg got shot a dozen times still landed his plane and was denied a Victoria cross

[@blockhead134]

"Ok, as long as your not angry..." She is a treasure

[@numbmind120]

I'd love to see a Mad Lads episode on John Paul Jones, a American Revolutionary War Naval captain/privateer who happens to be from Scotland.

[@alanmilland3842]

and also played bass with Led Zeppelin. True madlad.

[@GonzoIV]

Never heard of him, gotta do some research on him

[@voraciousblackstn]

Father of the US Navy, truely a Mad Lad.

[@sixT4T]

yep we know who he is but here's an E for effort anyway choadtard

[@jacobduty28]

He has not yet begun to fight.

[@altcapright9114]

"includes paid promotion" How hasn't BBC bitched about this yet.

[@Certified-Bruh171]

Zhang is basically just Majima from the Yakuza series irl

[@wilhelmt.muller170]

i need a dame dane that he covered

[@jackakakreanxx5587]

Imagine dynasty warrior but with the story and humor of Yakuza

[@nightmares8213]

@@jackakakreanxx5587 that’s basically just dynasty warriors 3

[@youngroyalty7991]

Didn't Know Zhang Zongchang had serious BARS.

[@AlphaBiggotz]

I couldn't hear what the missus said, but I can tell she's a keeper.

[@MauveGun]

She came in because she thought he was mad, and when he asked if she wasn't ok with the opium and hookers she said "no"

[@lanasmith4795]

I think what she said was "as long as you're not angry" since she heard him making a lot of noise and yelling and grew concerned

[@RatFacedJasper]

He brought terrible pain upon the world, but also he allowed me to enjoy poetry. Shades of grey.

[@oz_jones]

Duality of man

[@Captain_Veinrick]

When Russia undergoes a communist revolution and some people leave cause they knew communism was bad but they fled to China feels bad man

[@JordiumZ]

Nice xenoblade pfp great taste

[@12many4you]

JordiumZ learned how to spell a word. He she did not let what it means or when to implement it. But oh glorious day. She learned how to spell it.

[@JordiumZ]

@@12many4you xenoblade is a game I like and his profile picture is the main character from that game

[@koikat3708]

Well, that's funny because last time I checked, the living conditions in the USSR were far better than in the Russian Empire. But you know, sure. Also I forgot to mention that the general populace had more rights.

[@robokill387]

@@koikat3708 yeah, tell that to the people who died in the holodomor.

[@SpectralUmbreon197]

Dankula: * Makes an interesting video about a Chinese Warlord * The Chat: *CREEPER?! AWWWWWW MAAAAAAAAN!!!!!!!*

[@falconfury2061]

So

[@falconfury2061]

We

[@absolutegarbage3654]

Back

[@PKFLASH123]

In

[@andrewleonard475]

In

[@Transblucency]

I'm starting to think these desktops aren't just coincidence.

[@valar_dohaeris7387]

Pretty sure the desktop on the left displays a commonly used meme emote in China. Someone correct me if I am wrong though.

[@jessecabrera7484]

This lad was truly the first mr. worldwide 👉😎👉

[@DFOSpitfire]

This series is my favorite tbh, makes some history entertaining.

[@kornx10]

11:38 she's probably thinking. What's the worst that could happen.

[@ciarfah]

I can hear Dank's soul leave his body every time he shills for raid

[@marciaosullivan3200]

See he can't be anti semitic he loves to shill like his Jewish friend's

[@markparkinson6378]

That intro music, man! Every time you introduce someone with that music, it makes them so much scarier!

[@prestond.3339]

Do tango mike/mike the green beret, basically Hispanic Rambo, vietnam legend

[@be_easy001]

P. Schmoney one of many Texas mad lads! The dudes story brings tears to my eyes every time I hear it.

[@Mach5Johnny]

P. Schmoney Roy Benavidez!!!!!!!

[@kaiserwilhelmthesecond4144]

Even though this was likely all inspired by the one or two 4chan posts we’ve all seen, I’m glad it came to dank’s attention

[@generalmarkmilleyisbenedic8895]

Speak for yourself normie

[@NoManLP]

I see why you married her. Amazing woman you have Dank. Cherish that one lol

[@concernedcitizen6577]

Here are some of the Dogmeat General's best poetry: “Praying For Rain” The sky god is also named Zhang Why does he make life hard for me If it doesn’t rain in three days I’ll demolish your temple Then I’ll have cannons bombard your mom “Poem About Bastards” You tell me to do this He tells me to do that You are all bastards Go fuck your mother “Untitled” Someone asks me how many women I have I really don’t know either Yesterday a boy called me ‘dad’ I don’t know who his mother is “Visiting Mount Tai” From afar, Mount Tai looks blackish Narrow on top and wide at the bottom If you flipped it upside down It would be narrow at the bottom and wide on top “Visiting Pengai Pavillion” What a pavilion Place is fucking nice If the gods can get here I’ll take a seat too Have a drink by the window Sing some songs to the ocean Play some cards I think I’ll get drunk “Lightning” I saw lightning in the sky It’s like God wants to get lit If God isn’t lighting up Then why is there lightning?

[@Милош-р3д]

His poetry is the single reason we need S.T.E.A.M. in sted of S.T.E.M.

[@sonicninja3434]

PLEASE READ ALL THE POETRY!!!! I snort laughed after a long day, and this was amazing, and made me smile too damn hard!

[@weeborweed683]

Another interesting fact about this guy is his abnormal height for his time. Zhang stood around 6'3" which made him one of the tallest warlords of China. In a failed campaign he lead, he actually turned down the idea of escaping by dressing up as a civilian cuz he realized that people didn't need to see his face to know who he is.

[@niubi3923]

Wikipedia says 6’6 or 7’

[@generalmarkmilleyisbenedic8895]

@@niubi3923ok…. And its wikipedia… with a large margin of error..