Covert Narcissists vs Sociopaths. ASPD vs NPD. A Deep Dive

[@SteeleMagnolia]

Knowing from experience, unmasking the covert narcissist is like opening the gates of Hell. The degree of hate and torment that they can bring onto their victim is life-changing.

[@pattiewoodall2488]

The ex (covert narc) once told me "You love yourself too much" that's when I knew I had won. He couldn't break me. ❤ Then I discarded the mental case and moved 1100 miles away and created my own happy ending (new chapter). ❤ Much love and strength to anyone going through this situation. Choose you, you are so worth it!

[@Cuzzakat]

Covert narcs are so disordered they will eventually out themselves. It will come unravelled eventually. The advice to run and not look back is the only way to deal with them. Never get “revenge”. Never try to get closure.

[@dianebox9376]

The covert narcissist I knew played the victim until her mask came off.

[@noverguy]

YES - Absolutely. Well said. Victim and innocent - then "ka-boom" the real woman came out one morning never to return to the fakery that had been going on all along for eight years.

[@Dorakis7]

Mine too, I’ve never experienced so much evil… and I’ve been through a lot.

[@sparkyntay95]

Amen

[@OnsKleinGezinnetje]

They all do

[@AnaRivera-u7v]

The one I know played the supportive nice guy.

[@beegirl8884]

My covert narcissistic ex husband was a police officer for 31 years & a church deacon. The mental & emotional abuse he perpetrated are mind boggling. I was the person he “handled” for 19 years. I was in the cult of Mike. Far more damaging than the overt narc 1st husband. At least his cards were on the table. Ross, your book Human Magnet Syndrome was one of the first books I bought about narcissism, putting me on the path to freedom. I can’t thank you enough for all you do to make victims of these demons aware of what they are going through.

[@Trixie_Django]

Now that I've been dealing with a covert narc couple that are my upstairs neighbors (one of them is a Mike) that have made my life a living hell for 11 months (out of nowhere and for no apparent reason), I'm also becoming more aware about my past romantic relationships and learning that I was always a magnet for it. It's a hard pill to swallow but it's making me stronger every day and for that, I feel blessed. I'm so sorry you've gone through that beegirl... if they're not the police officer deacon... then they're going to be in some other position where they have influence and power and it's always an abuse of power as well as an overestimation of what kind of control they will have over others. There are always going to be those of us that are stronger and wiser for the experience and eventually say, "nope". And "nope" is the greatest weapon we have but it also comes with its own share of crazy. These people have no off switch in addition to no empathy or boundaries. Point being ... I'm convinced that these are demons and they sniff out those of us who just wanted a break to hide from the crazy and simply wanted to be more.

[@helenmcclay2622]

Same ( & he went by Mike/Michael too). I think he had a split personality ( or multiple).

[@helenmcclay2622]

The other supply was 'Michal' too. 😅

[@Clevelandsteamer324]

Read: “power” by shaida arabi, “co-dependent no more” by Melanie Beatty, “malignant self love” - Sam Vaknin You must heal yourself or you will continue to attract the same type of person.

[@Mikhaspearo]

@@Trixie_Djangodear Trixie if both are narcs then that’s called “an ugly couple” and usually they won’t be the same diagnosis ie a covert and an overt can be together but not two coverts. If they have been together for a long period (married or together for 10-15 yrs) then you should run for your life. Ugly couples are super dangerous to deal with

[@jacquelinejacobson6789]

Ross, I was raised by a narcissist mother. Never knew this until recently. I kept being attracted to narcissists, controllers, and even psychopaths. Now in my senior years, it all makes absolute sense to me. I didn't achieve peace until I was happy being single and staying single

[@clairelicciardo6198]

Same

[@electrickitt3n]

Same, to all of it. Thankful for all of us that were able to get out of that cycle.

[@RexRoberts-hk3wj]

Narcs are evil soulless vampires. RUN 🏃‍♂️ 💨

[@Chris-mh6cg]

sociopaths are worse

[@LisaRobinson-we1ms]

Really? How?​@@Chris-mh6cg

[@animalityreality964]

There's a cross-over...they can be both!​@@Chris-mh6cg

[@souchoysaeteurn5211]

Coverts and aspd's show their true colors when no one else is listening or watching

[@SusieBear-ji3hq]

Who's to see then?

[@NopeNothingD9]

@@SusieBear-ji3hq the victim

[@souchoysaeteurn5211]

@@NopeNothingD9 also the people defending them but this person apparently can't comprehend that.

[@KatErina-ii6ru]

This will be interesting. My ex was a sociopath and he had a lot of covert traits.

[@PiscesinVa]

Me too 😢

[@wildhorses6817]

Me too. So Sad. No cure. It is so painful to be in these relationships. Such evil people enjoying the pain they cause.

[@mtc-j9i]

I can’t decide which one my ex was….maybe there is some overlap. They’re so sneaky that they fool anyone they want to fool. But when they show you how low they can go…you realize you’re dealing with a real life conman who will destroy you while having the sympathy of the whole community. Somehow everyone will blame you for your own destruction and shower THEM with sympathy for YOUR downfall. Lol it’s pure insanity.

[@Clevelandsteamer324]

@@mtc-j9ithey will launch a smear campaign and enlist flying monkeys to get at you. There is a lot to learn about this.

[@AlexKell885]

I bet he was a weed physically. They usually are

[@juliebeau2011]

Healing is possible when you know the truth! It took me 42 years to find out that my father is a covert narcissist. And I now have been on my healing journey for the past 7 years. It feels wonderful. Thank you so much for your information, insights, videos and books, Ross.

[@BettyStahl-f2c]

My sister in law is a covert narc. She's turned my granddaughter into her flying monkey. I've gone no contact with my SIL because I do believe she was dangerous to me. She constantly played gotcha games followed by an evil smirk. Her games included breaking my things she knew meant alot to me. My granddaughter now does her bidding followed by a smirk. It breaks my heart seeing this. We were close at one time. Thank you for your insights. Yes they are dangerous because they justify everything they do.

[@LisaRobinson-we1ms]

Wow, that's horrible, I understand and I don't know you but I can say I'm sorry you're experiencing these things from the people so close to you. I guess many of us just forget the basics, like love.

[@jimbougard8560]

Thank you! I had to deal with a covert narcissist neighbor/friend for years after going no contact. At the time, I didn’t know what I was dealing with. I was trying to figure out if I was dealing with a sociopath. This particular video reinforces my resolve to not let down my guard. I now see how those spectrums can intertwine. That warped mind still occasionally vandalizes our property and leaves his calling card. On the bright side, I educated myself about narcissists. The run of the mill grandiose narcissist gets my A game. I torment those little monsters for sport, just by ignoring them. On the other hand, the covert narcissist has me maintaining a serious security and surveillance system at home. I won’t even get into being armed at all times. I often make the joke, “just because I’m paranoid doesn’t mean they aren’t out to get me.”

[@joe7665]

I started catching onto my ex wife. She was ramping up the micro verbal abuse (narcissistic abuse) After I caught her having an affair, she wanted to work our marriage out for our daughter (that was a lie). a week after catching her we were sitting on the couch chatting and I started watching her play her mind games more aggressively, not looking in the eyes when talking to you, not contributing after I got finished talking about something, and just talking about herself and the great things she has done.. being completely dismissive. I looked at her after a micro passive aggressive insult and I said… You know what you are doing is part of the narcissistic trait. OMG… 😂 I got an ear full and that’s when she knew the jig was up. I filed for divorce 1 month later. She knew what she was doing

[@dddamaged7501]

A point I've seen in coverts is they are good with cognitive empathy to manipulate!

[@bandieboo8102]

Totally agree. Smiling assassins imo 🤐🤐. Theirs is Fake empathy..a narc is a narc is a narc ...

[@joe7665]

Facts…. This is more of a dark triad than of a covert narcissist I have learned.

[@dddamaged7501]

Mine a covert malignant narcissist ​@@joe7665

[@neringaLTUK]

I wish I didn’t called him out and just quietly run away…. I hurt myself more. And in so many eyes (of his hundreds of friends and family) I am a crazy one… coz how could she be so ungrateful when she has such a great man giving her everything she needs!!! I think knowing how many supporters he has out there hurts me more than his sick behaviour with me when we were together

[@ABlessman]

I'm so sorry.I know exactly what you're going through. Who do YOU have for support?

[@bitfreedom]

I absolutely destroyed a narc this summer. He tried everything. Even paid me to stay with him. I took his money and ditched him. 🖕🏻

[@wildhorses6817]

Out of nowhere, the narc ex assaulted me physically, it was terrifying. I was in my sixties. He has made me the evil person after all of the evil he has done, stealing, afffairs, betrayals, rage attacks. He lrtetends to be human, kind, upstanding professional. He is a Demon. He stole all of the money , he may have even arranged a motor vehicle hit causing me a TBI, IDK. I had secret lives. These are dangerous evil creatures.

[@LisaRobinson-we1ms]

Wow, my God, really? You're in my prayers I won't forget your story. May God be with you

[@lucylue1713]

So much thanks and love ,sending from Croatia.Before three years ago I find out that my single mother is convert narc.All my life (45yo now),and now I got so many answers ,I feel like Im free .Brother is golden child,Im the black sheep all my life. Never good enought...

[@awh5069]

Dr. Ross… Thank You for this video and for your insights. I am married to a covert narcissist. I see a great deal of overlap between his NPD and ASPD, but I believed I was wholly misinterpreting what I see. I have a much deeper understanding now. I cannot wait for your new book to drop. 💕

[@apeshitphilosophy5221]

They all have the same playbook, they want you to feel ignored to dissipate your life force

[@joe7665]

Damn… they all ignore what you say. so demonic what it does after a long period of time

[@ChildofGod98765]

Jesus I PRAISE you! Lord give me strength I’m struggling providing for my children. I’m so discouraged but I will keep faith because faith is all I have left! I suffer from lupus, and heart disease. I have two beautiful boys both are special needs. I’m overwhelmed because they require so much from me. I started homeschooling them due to bullying. Every month is a struggle to not end up on the streets but yet I still praise God. Thank you Jesus.💕❤️

[@Vintagelife888]

I will remember you my sister, pray for me too as I am in a similar situation. Let’s lift each other in prayer

[@foxiefair123]

❤️

[@foxiefair123]

@@Vintagelife888❤️

[@LisaRobinson-we1ms]

I'm praying for you too. You'll get through this.

[@caralee2617]

The confusion you experience while with a covert narcissist is indescribable. I've had boyfriends that were abusive but it's just so different. CN are so convincing that not only will the things they do break your heart but it completely throws u off because it's something u can't even picture them doing. If that makes sense. They make u believe they are a certain kind of person not capable of doing the things that your ex's did or what would hurt u most. That's what's so confusing then they blame u somehow because it's always your fault. I have been with a covert narcissist for 10yrs. No matter how many times I have been through the cycle or seen him rage I still can't picture it when he is love bombing me. Its the craziest thing. I guess everyone is different but for me the constant state of confusion is the absolute worst and most abusive part. But there are plenty other ways they abuse their partners… Withholding and silent treatment. You feel like your going to explode inside. Mine does this so I freak out and then he can blame me for the argument. Physically abusive. When a CN feels trapped they will do anything they can to regain that power and control. Or take something from you what u won't give them. Sexually abusive. Blaming u for watching porn, sex shaming u, withholding sex, having sex with u while your asleep. Blaming you for everything. Blaming you for having to blame you! Additionally, That feeling when your partner cheated and you don't have the courage to leave him / her so you just death with the pain and live everyday asking questions about your worth. This pain is different from the cheating one_living and seeing him everywhere anticipating when he or she do it again. The best thing is to hire a private investigator Barryinvestigation@gmail. com to help you spy on their cellphone remotely just like he did for me...

[@Clevelandsteamer324]

Cognitive dissonance, gaslighting, intermittent reinforcement are tools used by them. These are also used on prisoners of war to break them down. Someone that has not endured this type of abuse has no idea how destructive it can be. Please don’t discuss with someone that hasn’t experienced it. It is very invalidating.

[@sharonw2008]

I'm sorry but the FIRST thing you need to do is LEAVE!

[@ILENENETERER]

Why bother? Leave!!!!

[@paulettelamontagne6992]

Are you serious the thing to do is leave I can't believe anybody would be in a romantic relationship I'm trying to find out the workings of my grandson's father I can't imagine God bless you but come on really

[@SherryWilson-dk7bo]

Hello everyone, love and blessings to everyone ❤🙏

[@Summer_Harvest]

❤️‍🔥🙏🏼

[@maryjoseph81481]

At the age of 67, I now realize that I have had SLDD since the age of five. I am a confirmed empath. I walked out of my husband’s life three months ago. I never knew covert narcissism existed. I believe he is one. Unfortunately, I outed him to his family in the process. He has made my life an absolute hell. Despite that, I have peace and serenity away from him. I intend to continue to be my own person. Certainly, no contact is my best option. I truly enjoy being out with others and engaging with people, but, I am quite sure I will live alone for the time I have left. Not ever learning appropriate people skills makes me very cautious. I am well on my way to recovery!

[@jackyleblanc6460]

❤ sending you love

[@maryjoseph81481]

@@jackyleblanc6460 TYVM

[@jillathehun419]

Sending love and strength to continue living for you. God bless xxoo I'm still spinning since I've only recently realized just how twisted he really is. I think I am in shock trying to wrap my head around how after almost 14 years together (10.5 married) to find out he isn't who I thought he was. It's hard to put into words since I feel like over a decade of my life was spent loving a man I don't even know and never loved me by proving that daily saying and doing things so evil I feel frozen in shock.. Each day I just push myself to make peace with the inevitable which is to get out of this house /marriage as quickly and safely as possible. It feels like a bad dream. I hope I wake up soon in a beautiful new chapter. I am turning 50 this Sat 10/19 and pray & wish for continued clarity and peace of mind. May my next 50 years be spent helping others find their voice again. Thank you again for sharing your experiences and am terribly sorry you endured the indescribable pain for too long as well. You are amazing bringing hope for brighter days full peace, happiness, and unconditional love our beautiful souls desire & deserve. xxoo jill ⚖️🌛

[@maryjoseph81481]

@@jillathehun419 Walk away. Find peace. Never look back!

[@melanieknowles7002]

Covert narc....street angel...house devil...secret life.

[@joe7665]

Damn.. I like this

[@drb3353]

Sometimes they’ve enmeshed you so thoroughly there is literally nowhere to run.

[@noverguy]

Ross - This is the best expose on the CN I've ever heard given in 19 minutes. You covered it all SO well and you are defining this illness we call CN very very well. Thank you for all you do.

[@fifififi4short]

The best explanation of covert narcissists and.. my entire family i have heard yet. Maternal and child health nurse coordinator, is my covert (very) narcissistic mother's work title so this makes perfect sense to me.

[@sawdustadikt979]

Hi Ross, been watching and listening to your stuff for several years. Looking forward to your new book. I have a real blind spot for the covert types. But the more I learn the more I pay attention to the signs they give. I have noticed from my experiences that the mask always slips when there is money, success and recognition. Any of these alone or in combination. All that humility gets put away somewhere and all the grandiosity is shown proudly, the dismissivness, devaluing and public humiliation is on its way to everyone around them, particularly to those that helped them get there.

[@D3los]

New sub. Im not exactly hearing anything i didnt already know in my gut, but hearing all of this so succinctly stated is really opening my eyes. Presently trying to unravel the damage and stop myself from repeating patterns and mimicking unconsciously. Thank you for your work.

[@lindatallon9217]

My former roommate was a collapsed narc......it was apocalyptic.....ugly...nasty....dirty.....miserable....filthy...hoarding....obesity.....

[@markweikle5645]

This is such a valuable talk! I've seen the differences talked about here.

[@amandajohnson-williams7718]

Im not at all surprised you have pointed out this link with ASPD! Sadly I've witnessed it with 2 covert narcissists I dated for a considerable time, had to get rid of them! Thank you Ross 👏👏👏🇬🇧

[@caireengraham]

Thank you Dr Rosenberg

[@diasporaconnecttanzania3521]

Great video! Thank you for the breakdown. This is very scary!

[@AmourofgodShinelight]

This was absolutely tremendous Ross, Thank you so much for this, Very informative and insightful, I've done a lot of inner work and breaking patterns and will not allow myself to get involved with abusive guys and abusive relationships again, My self respect and dignity comes first, I deserve so much better, Peace, love and respect to you and everyone, Thank you universe, All glory to the most high God 💙🕊❤💜😃🌌💛💗🗝🚀🎆🍄🍎🍏🦄👽✌🐎♱🌈💚😘🕆😊

[@fifififi4short]

Wow so many emojis so colourful!

[@fifififi4short]

And also well said 🙂

[@isabellcaputo954]

Excellent explanation. Thank you.

[@JamFlava1]

I am diagnosed one with ASPD, schizoid by age 26, I am 34 now. I don’t hurt people at all. But I don’t act in public either, means I can look intimidating, callousness, giving predatory stare to the people, means I am not friendly, approachable I also lack empathy and no remorse at times. I only put a fake mask when I am at barber or dentist, I can be very likable and charming but all fake mask…. But in public when I meet random people or women generally. I show my true color. Uncaring, emotionless, intimidating, predatory stare. And you can tell they feel very uncomfortable around me. I have the good looks but still they feel uncomfortable around me. Because of my cold aura. I don’t like people…. You can tell I am misanthropic. I dislike humans….I also believe human nature is intrinsically evil and that deep down people only care about themselves. I won’t give 2 shits if the world, society collapses, not my problem, a person who dislike humans i don’t care at all. All ASPD individuals are different and we all have different point of views how we see things. Some ASPD are short-tempered, some of them want to see people suffer, some of us don’t care. We all individual. Only empathy I feel is for my parents, brother, friend, they’re everything for me, if something happens to them I will snap. Out of this circle i don’t give a f, there is no emotional bonding nothing. Pure blank space.

[@Vintagelife888]

I wonder, do you sometimes wish you were different, had the capacity to feel empathy and love? Or are these emotions repulsive to you. If someone could transform you with a flick of a switch would you want that change or would you hate that they changed you? I would appreciate your honest feedback

[@JamFlava1]

@@Vintagelife888 Good question, i am going to be honest as possible with you. All sociopathic are different. Some sociopaths seem to respond more emotionally to certain situations, usually by anger, but all of us seem to have blunted or turned down emotions. However, what we all don't have is empathy for other people, and that is a problem to have human emotional experience. Most of human emotion is triggered through how someone else feels, we don't get that kind of a vicarious response through other people, so when we feel emotions they are usually few and far in between. Personally speaking i can’t speak all for other sociopaths out there. So no i don’t want my empathy, love come back and yes i blame the abusers not the people. I would feel fear though if my emotions come back to normal state, meaning that i feel empathy, love again like you…..Now, I have trigger responses. I am going to explain it, Let’s say, i found my childhood abusers in real life on the street, it can end up really badly you probably know what will happen…. But if someone insult me calling me names? I don’t care unless he is pushing my berserk button, than i can be very erratic. Do i have issues? Yeah, i am aware of it. Do i want to hurt innocent people? No. I rather hurt abusers in real life. Have a nice day.

[@Winter-q9c9p]

Thank you for sharing what it’s like to have this diagnosis. It takes courage to admit how you feel. You helped make a lot of people get what is going on with the people they are dealing with. I hope when people understand that when you say you don’t give a F and you have no empathy that you mean it. Maybe the truth will give them the courage to leave and never go back. I wish you well because the people you do care about love you.

[@JamFlava1]

@@Winter-q9c9p I like you, you’re not an hypocrite. Have a nice day.

[@paulettelamontagne6992]

​@@JamFlava1talk to our father in Heaven. Through his son Jesus Christ he has the power to soothe your soul

[@kerryharper5675]

Everything you said is so true! So true. Thank you. You are the best Mr Ross! You saved my sanity some years back bless you 🙏

[@nellythenarcissist]

This conversation about NPD and APD sociopathy and psychopathy is quite nuanced because I’ve found it not to be cut and dry in some cases. Example my ex is a covert narcissist, maybe malignant and does definitely also have some sociopathy. It’s very confusing.

[@sunnyadams5842]

And this guy confuses everything further. Go to HG Tudor and Understand Narcissism. It doesn't have to be so confusing.

[@amyb7823]

I agree, there's so much overlap between these types of characteristics that center on lack of empathy. It's hard to differentiate between NPD, ASPD or sociopathy. Very difficult for a regular person to differentiate.

[@katthompson3852]

Brilliant! Fantastic explanation for the delineation between them both! Great refresher. Thank you so much! Love this channel for your professionalism. ❤from 🇳🇿NZ.

[@kim_possible1974]

This is my current ex. We are separated, but he’s still living in my house. I appreciate your insight.

[@sloene72]

What are the things that you have done to protect yourself in your home with them and how long was it before you realised they didn't love anyone not even you? I think could be in same position but still working it out. They appear to not care about me since I brought it up what I witness about them. Like a switch flipped in them they don't have to pretend but I see them look at me and smile when with others if we have friends over and it's always the opposite sex they are talking to that they regurgitate things I talk about. They're almost completely silent with me and refuse to sort this mess out for possessions division, pets car etc. They hopefully will leave but they know they're onto a good thing. One thing I noticed right away is they dropped their ex who'd hooked up with them like it was nothing to them and their kids and wanted sex to seal the deal right away with me then ignored their children and cat and myself, never seemed to have any likes of their own and copied me. Their face looks glum all the time and no personality. Nearly 10 years and I don't know them except when they lie to me. They have discarded me in the house when I saw through their mask. Concerning health and if they care at all about people when they are hurt they will leave you to fend for yourself and say you didn't say you needed my help

[@kim_possible1974]

@@sloene72 I will confidently tell you this is the exact behavior of a narcissist. Prepare an exit strategy. Have your own money. And leave quietly and carefully. They can be dangerous when you unmask their behavior. I pray for your peace of mind. It will never get better; you will only lose more of yourself in the process of trying to figure them out. 💕

[@MCognettaable]

I knew I was dealing with something psychologically crazy when I was crying In his arms about things HE was doing to me, and he was “comforting” me…it was the most disorienting, mind fuk of a situation…I felt so emeshed and isolated and confused that I only had him to turn to, and felt like he was the “only person who ever loved me”😳 I was fkd in the head at that time and so glad I got out of that mess! I remember just always being soo confused but could never put my finger on it, or explain it….smh

[@tooshay7396]

as always, great content but WHY did you flash the double handed DEVIL HORN symbol at 6:28 min mark? just asking .. all the celebs and politicians do it

[@shaneconroy3065]

Because he's obviously a baby blood drinking Satanist. There is no such thing as narcissism, it's a lie by the DEVIL.

[@SherryONeill]

Wow Multiple Times

[@Peepers2]

This was an excellently presented video……Many Thanks

[@MaryMullen-n5r]

That was a very good explanation of the disorders thank you.

[@lisaaronson283]

Haven't seen you in a while R.R. Everything you've explained is so true. You look like you've lost weight. I hope it's because you are taking good care of yourself. Congrats on your new book! Many Blessings to you!

[@kim_possible1974]

Wow….APD and CN. This is exactly what I’m experiencing.

[@Clevelandsteamer324]

4:49 Machiavellian

[@belindanewton3789]

This is so interesting the covert narc l knew had so many sociopathic traits they appeared to overlap.

[@TR-nv3if]

Very interesting.. my narc. Or?? Usually will hide his mean persona from his ( our ) adult som. He doesn’t want our son seeing him treat his son’s mother badly, however, when the son ( or neighbors or friends) are not around, the mask comes off quite often .. a few times the narc’s mask slipped in front of our son.. my son seemed surprised,,,I don’t know if my son said anything to his dad or not, but after that, narc spouse always keeps his horns in when our son is present. In a nutshelll, narc bends over backwards to me and is Mr Normal in front of our son, (when our son visits us from out of town). Narc now acts beholden and afraid of our son..like he’s afraid to act bad in front of him…good.( of course, my ( our) son is a wonderful smart, empathetic young man..

[@amarieg5]

Ross does your online videos on your website have catptions/ subtitles for the deaf and hearing impaired?

[@loladickson4373]

I'm actually going through exactly what you are describing.

[@Abaddis-en2sr]

Very good video and covert Malignant narcissist more more dangerous aspd and psychopath covert malignant narcissist is the predator or human devil

[@coraelizabethconteh6683]

My mother has aspd, my MIL is a covert narcissist. This video is so on point

[@daniellatan9016]

I cannot wait, Dr Rosenberg!

[@lookupyourredemptiondrawsn7285]

Thank you Royal We! 😉😉

[@ElaineRudnicki]

Ross my story is quite unique and I think it merits being told as a textbook example of just how extremely dangerous a female covert narcissist can be. It is quite uncommon but I can’t expose it here. Even though I’m a therapist myself I have not been able to fully unpack certain details since I am part of the tentacular system being played by the covert narcissist. Is there any way to do a session with you?

[@monicaraybon1802]

Yup mine was a teacher

[@mariatwachtman4962]

Can’t wait 😊

[@billthom3307]

Hoping you will respond with some clarity… I was married to a covert narcissist for 25 years, it took me five years to become divorced without being totally destroyed, however, she totally turned my adult children against me and I believe she is playing the same game particularly with my oldest daughter has become her new primary source of supply. I still have a reasonably decent relationship with my oldest who moved out of the house to college prior to my exiting the marriage, I would like to know what the process would be that you would suggest for helping my two daughters understand what’s going on with them and their mother and break free. I understand how dangerous my ex-wife is. She nearly destroyed me financially and emotionally and I’m just now after number of years starting to gain some self-esteem. I would like some guidance on how to approach and help my adult children recognize and then also release themselves from her control.?

[@derycktrahair8108]

1st symptom = self promotion.

[@lookupyourredemptiondrawsn7285]

Absolute 100%. I always felt they were an actual psychopath

[@timaster850]

I am exactly that, a covered narcissist. But it's the First time I get this. I know if im like im realy am the people in my life would be shocked to their bones. I know im Bad and I Cover it with a mask to All people at every time. The Bad side never came out and I even fight Anti social behavior bcs I know wath I can make up.

[@sG-zj5ot]

My covert wife was so deceiving, not smart, i just couldnt expect a human to be so cold, let alone a shy anti social young women. Once the mask is uncovered its over.

[@ONLYLOVEIZATION]

The story of the young boy at high school. What a mind f that must’ve been for him. These people can do great psychological damage.

[@lindatallon9217]

The house of cards are crashing around them..

[@Summer_Harvest]

Can you explain how to understand the need to be admired but not wanting to be a leader (always turning down leadership roles)?

[@evilbarbie2160]

My thoughts are that they know they are defficient and their lies will catch up with them in that setting as a leader. They like their flying monkeys and enabelers to be around them.

[@ScentualBeauty]

Bc they don’t want to be responsible. They like to triangulate from the sidelines.

[@Summer_Harvest]

@@ScentualBeauty Thank you, I never understood this. This sheds some light.

[@Summer_Harvest]

Coming out full force ramped up their game!

[@bertan8510]

You seem to be describing my social worker sister

[@harmony3279]

You exactly describe a partner I just cut off.

[@aynosanyroh4092]

Excellent!

[@VICTORIA-rh6nt]

❤🎉THANK U 🎉

[@raelynnwolfe8762]

Great info, thank you!

[@sambam9129]

This is really good

[@NPC-0013]

I have BPD and it’s fcking awesome!!!!! But then 5 mins later I wana die slowly 😂🙄

[@marcuswellby1]

Is the new book going to have an audiobook version?

[@atinathenice1]

@ross what danger are you talking about whwn exposing CNPD?

[@lookingtowardsthesun]

Ever imaginable kind. Speaking from experience.

[@KseniaHerdt]

Truly anything. When they are in rage, they turn to a psychopath. There is no one inside. You feel it with every sense of your being. And you know that anything can happen. It’s like they’re taken over by a demon that can do anything to you. The person I specifically know abused several intimate partners physically. Made an attempt to sexual assault. Even physically abused one on the open street. Where he normally would do his best to act his humble and kind self. That’s shows that they get totally out of control when they have an injury. Most dangerous under the abuse of alcohol. And he’s just 25 years. I don’t know what is going to follow in the future. 🙏🏻 I am talking about a „Christian CN“, who will pray in front of the people in his community. Very confusing, destructive and dangerous.

[@sandie683]

Thank U, you are the best!!

[@aprilc1077]

How does one figure out where they fit into all this? I know I have felt narcissistic behavior from family members, but are they truly narcissists? Am I co-dependent, or worse, as in being a narcissist? I'm 60 and as of 3 years ago became quite angry when any family member discounted my needs as they related to family interactions and support (like for our parents). I felt like they didn't care what I was sacrificing (wanted me to live with and take care of my dad). Long story. I'm tired, maybe I'm mean too when I've lashed out at them. 20 years ago I tried to commit suicide. God taught me He loves me, so no more of that, but I still have no reason to be here. 60 years old and always alone, it's others that make life worth living. No one is thrilled about coming home and making dinner for themself. It's the other person(s) or your family that give it meaning. I just try to get through, one day at a time and I think there is a covert at my "kinda new" job. I set a boundary and now she told a fat lie about me saying I called her a bad name. I did not. 😔 I have no one to talk to about it. I told my boss the truth but i didn't put the lady down other than saying it's not true. She can't see how the woman is. I'm just tired all the time but I keep moving. 😅

[@EILEENMACLEODmacleodspotshots]

Thank you so much .🙏🙏

[@NicoleBalmain-vp7en]

💯🔥👿 YOU HAVE THIS DOWN TO A SCIENCE IM VERY IMPRESSED EVERYTHING YOU ARE SAYING IS A FACT 👿🔥💯

[@namastea]

The person i know has all the Antisocial Personality disorder traits you describe except for one: they actually love attention, and they monopolize every conversation..so I'm confused 😕

[@sG-zj5ot]

Suddenly you see how vengeful and cruel they are … mask off

[@AugenaufbeimAktienkauf]

I am currently treating my gf xD Maybe I am just training her, or maybe she really is making progress... dunno. Anybody any experience? So what I am trying to show her is, that nothing is dangerous in this world to her. I don't do anything for her but be happy and enjoying life. I ignore when she asks for help and she can do all the stuff herself. And I talk indirectly about Narcs because all of my family are narcs (hard to believe and I am still not sure, but the behavior is just...). So I have not told her, that I know she is a covert but I will soon, but I will also tell her, that I will not abandon her. We will not be a couple (we are not really a couple anymore haha). She gets very nervous every time I point out behavior of narcs and she realizes that she has done the same and she tries to explain it away. Maybe she is just suffering and I am turtering her... Dunno. Not my intention. So my explanation for narcissism is that the parents didn't protect the kids from the world. They should have shown their kids what is a danger and what is no problem (in my life everything was a big danger!!! I realized my dad always told me how afraid he was of sharks. When I pointed out that there are no sharks in German waters, he said: well still you never know. I was afraid of sharks for 36 yrs even while diving) So reality for a narc is just dangerous and creates a lot of fear and that's why they want to destroy you: If you seem weaker than them, then they don't feel so bad about their fears and themselves in general. They are just little kids who don't know better (doesn't feel like it, when they mistreat you haha). I woke up after 36 yrs and I forgave my family, I know what it means to be a narc, because I lived in their world for a while. Talked to my brother about his fears of receiving letters in the mail. Same thing but my fear just went away. I never knew that there were nice people out there. I thought everybody was out to get you: EVERYBODY. I always knew that something was wrong with me but... 36 yrs later.

[@tatiannamarshalls2705]

P Diddy is probably a covert narcissist 🤔

[@redsquirrel1086]

There's just way too much information out there, and I'm going to give you some more.

[@mariekarole1621]

Mine brags about how he tricks folks to his favors. Yes predicts outcomes to always get what they want.

[@jemmaj6292]

Clarifies what i already knew. My father a sociopath. My sons father a covert npd. Never saw it coming as he seemed the opposate of my father. Interestingly.... is a covert and a malignant the same? Depressingly my first boyfriend ( if you can call it that) was seriously dangerous and unhinged but again incredibly manipulative and in your face with it..... like physically so. He was very sadistic, substance misuse issues ( dribk drugs smoking everything you name it) self harmed suicidal ideation stalked others impregnated other mens partners..... what would that be?? Again Depressing with the covert narc.... made out that he was a good, kind family man and a good person.

[@harmony3279]

Does the covert narcissist knows and intentionally know that they are attracting a codependent?

[@SimonDuschl-b3b]

Hey there, im Simon, im 28 and im like 70% Sure im a covert narcissist. Im currently on Therapie because of some other topic and im thinking about telling my therapist about it. But there are 2 Problems. 1st she is a jung naiv and attraktiv woman and if i tell her, i cant sleep with her. And 2nd i dont know for Sure if being narcissistic and manipulative is a bad thing 🤔 I would love to talk to you some day, maybe you can help me :)

[@sloene72]

She probably knows and doesn't want to sleep with a covert, and you'll need to bring it up what you believe about yourself

[@angie-mg6ky]

Yes false personality and you will sometimes only admit it when you add all the puzzel peaces and start your healing everything

[@angie-mg6ky]

What you actually FEEL with them is the truth, because you never been in such a situation you Wil think you (I) am a horrible person whereby it is them. He got triggered and strangled my 2 Dutch hounds to death, hacking someone's fb and tried to put it on the neighbor

[@angie-mg6ky]

No remorse. Total victim

[@angie-mg6ky]

Isolated me, deflated tyre's so that I cannot go anywhere. Finally after hating myself, anxiety attacks, depression I can accept the truth about him and do not blame myself and my healing can start as from today.

[@angie-mg6ky]

I think the silent covert narcs are most dangerous

[@angie-mg6ky]

This is the best video I have heard about covert narcs because you see the danger in them, the danger I felt and them acting being this perfect person and don't dare to prove it.

[@foxiefair123]

Sounds like somebody that I used to know.😂Yep. Just like the song.

[@namastea]

Hey, there are KZbinrs who know they have NPD. So I'm a bit confused when you say they don't.

[@marcioandre6469]

must be lee hammock. most Narcs know there is something wrong with them(but they don't know exactly). Some end up realizing and hide it few try to really improve, and most just pretend they are trying.

[@koolkat6841]

I'm in narc jail seems hopeless to get out.even with faith in God I'm still trapped.

[@Megan43210]

How does cheating come into play with a narcissist or sociopath

[@SoulSeeker2025]

"It's a pretend persona." Unbelievable! How do you wrap your head around this?

[@josephl6289]

dude was raised on public television

[@lindsay5305]

This is the definition of ego

[@monicaraybon1802]

No one believes you if you out them

[@kendrarobbins646]

My mom's a covert narcissist