Crash Course in Lesbian Dating (with Jordan Harvey)

We got your dating questions... and Jordan Harvey is here to answer them! Jordan and Mal sit down to chat about the intricacies of dating women for the first time and the questions that come up - how do I figure out what my type is? Who makes the first move? Who pays for the date? What are the best apps for queer women? And many more. So listen up, take notes, and best of luck out there!
Find our guest @Jordan.harvey (IG) and @_jordan.harvey (TikTok)
Please remember to subscribe, rate, review and share this podcast with your crush! Follow the show at @madeitoutpodcast and follow Mal @malglowenke

[@movsess]

i rarely ever feel this way but i wish these podcasts were longer

[@sulagreen5792]

Why does Mal always like these comments, but then not do it?

[@cmerry3996]

Perfect length!

[@MadeItOutPodcast]

@@sulagreen5792hi!! We are working on making the episodes longer- just don’t want to add unnecessary fluff to add time. But we hear you and hopefully can bring you more length/substance in the near future!

[@karenarias3721]

Oooohhhh I agree! 😊

[@KaraFrances-il8mi]

​@sulagreen5792 get yr own dam pod😂 Ps Jordan is so funny gr8 talk ladies

[@PetraDivjak]

Gosh, the irony of a university being called LIBERTY and being so restrictive to people's freedom...

[@mizzmatrix]

I really love Ashley Gavin's pick-up line at bars where she says "Are you gay enough for me to buy you a drink?". It's so open and honest, and it's an easy way to let people know you're interested without trying to figure it out via a long conversation that is not going anywhere.

[@someonesomehow379]

rightt!! ashley’s sick

[@Raddiebaddie]

“Nothing about me screamed gay” was actually pretty validating bc I really doubted myself when people were so shocked like I must’ve gotten it wrong :/

[@someonesomehow379]

oh I’m sorry u felt that way! but that thought is based on stereotypes of what gay looks like.. which aren’t factual yk like if u are gay u look gay periodt. yk ?

[@yasminhabibti721]

Exactly 💯 Well-said!

[@sulagreen5792]

I want a second interview with her. I want to hear more about her dating when she was closeted. That had to be really smooth.

[@Mellovesdeep25]

I would love to see an episode solely on the femme struggles. I have been on a rant about the gay/hetero struggles we have to balance being gay but looking straight and I love to hear some opinions on this subject.

[@sharin922]

yesssss

[@spencerhansen5109]

@@sharin922 Sharon922 As a man I find these topics interesting because of how many times they come out and say something that explains their actions

[@aliceadam6896]

Oh I loved her so much😂. This episode guest was just a breath of fresh air. I loved her exuberant energy and the stories she told were very compelling. I also loved her confidence of approaching women in a just effortless way😂. Must say, there is a lot to learn from her.😂

[@ruled_by_pluto]

really interesting podcast and fascinating conversation! as a bisexual woman, i want to urge women who like women to be more assertive, clear, and direct with their intentions and interest. don't be subtle! offer to buy her a drink, ask for her number, and ask her on what's clearly a date. don't be ashamed. sometimes i feel like an anthropologist navigating the world as a bisexual, able to analyze gender and sexuality from a unique perspective. men are socialized to be more direct while women are socialized to be more passive. it results in lesbian dating being much harder, and i don't like always feeling pressure to make the first move or be the more assertive/dominant person in a dating dynamic. i also really don't like grey areas between friends and dating, it's usually a huge waste of my time and energy. anyway, great conversation and i especially appreciated the perspective on the different experiences of being more masc or more femme presenting. you have a new subscriber!

[@ciobalina7445]

Well, you could be the one to take initiative and clarify the situation from the start, whether they want friendship or something more.

[@ruled_by_pluto]

@@ciobalina7445 if there are a lot of people interested in me, i am going to choose the person who is confident enough to make that clear without being prompted. i'm not attracted to insecurity or passivity. i'm attracted to people who are self assured and assertive.

[@christianbirk7307]

I really do appreciate the talk about dating a woman that hasn't ever dated woman before ❤

[@AlbertHess-xy7ky]

What is the draw? Penetration.

[@nrsyzygy]

I need like an extended edition of these episodes, I have loved every episode so far

[@emilypalma5763]

It feels sooo good to have representation ❤ we need more episodes!!

[@kileybatchelor]

That laugh is so infectious 🥹

[@travelwithsuvarna5474]

I have been waiting for this episode for last 3 days. Your podcast is kinda relief for me, I listen to it while I’m even working. As someone who’s living in a country where I can be who I am is really depressing. Your content really helpful to relax and chill ❤

[@Nowthisisliving2]

I can feel you , are you from india ?

[@willow1698]

Are you planning on emigrating elsewhere?

[@Nowthisisliving2]

u m no , but why ?@@willow1698

[@eloisejenninger9735]

These podcasts are genuinely so amazing. These need to be longer !!! Honestly I don’t often listen to podcasts but these really keep my attention. They feel so real and authentic ❤

[@isabellabrandaoalcantara7356]

Hi, I’m from Brasil and this podcast has helped me so much, thanks for your work I really needed this kind of content. I’ve kind of made a marathon of ALL GUESTS, and I feel so glad I did it, I’m about to turn 25 next year and sometimes I feel so old of start to living as a queer person in the last 2 years, but the stories here made me realize that this is not uncommon and I’m not weird for that.

[@vivienansinelli1031]

Please do a podcast on dating for older women.

[@BluePatriotWinner]

Yes! like 50+ women just coming out especially if she finally escaped from church culture.

[@SaloYD]

I seriously love every single episode of this podcast UGH

[@merkadist]

i've discovered this podcast recently but already love it!

[@hilberryable]

Love the irony of the name of the University. Liberty = Freedom.

[@cryptochrome3090]

It’s wild

[@megshogie6123]

What a great way to wake up, a new video from you!! The only negative to finding you early on is that you dont have a bunch of videos to binge waiting for the next one! 😂

[@eloisejenninger9735]

These are genuinely so amazing. These need to be longer !!! Honestly I don’t often listen to podcasts but these really keep my attention. They feel so real and authentic ❤

[@KayBassie]

I so appreciate this podcast. Loving these topics and perspectives. So needed💕 side note: the whole 'predatory lesbian' trope that the media created is such a farce. Many a lesbians dont want to make another woman feel uncomfortable, even if they are flirting with you. I so dont make the first move unless I get 500% go ahead from that woman. I so had a crush in my apt and after her light flirting with me I still didnt make the move.

[@kbelle9569]

❤ a few minutes in and I don't want it to end. I relate so much with Jordan's experiences. Also, she's hilarious 😂

[@hnysdn]

She should become a teacher! I understood and comprehended what she said on a whole other level, she speaks so clearly and cohesively lol , women.

[@meganmainguy783]

I look forward to this podcast every week and stalk tik tok and watch all the clips in anticipation. So happy a new episode i can obsess over is out

[@ApParashar]

Loved Jordan's energy and vibe🤩🤩

[@immysapplesauce2291]

Loved the energy in this pod! Thank you! Got a date tonight, keep them fingers crossed guys!

[@187942]

I feel like you two are so similar and so different. First time watching this “series” (?) but I love it

[@applejoker21]

Just seeing the podcast for the first time. Love this topic and advice

[@ashleycrowder9696]

So good!! Missed the U-Haul / U ghost segment . It’s my fav 😂❤

[@cyndykated358]

We didn’t have the luxury of the Internet in the 90s..but we did have amazing huge gay women bars in Los Angeles…coffee shops and a Women’s Comedy and Fest..way up in the mountains. It was all magical…coming out was tricky! ❤

[@cyndykated358]

Comedy and Music Fest!

[@JulesLern]

Loving this content every week! So refreshing 💖💖

[@KK-rc5ds]

I’m 62- we had so many gay and lesbian bars. We got to meet so many women. Miss that-

[@dinsche1478]

Another great one, love it. The vibe is so great, make me laught a lot, so much good content, thaaaanks Girls and yeah you can simply talk longer 😊

[@shirsch7048]

I love this podcast, too bad it wasn't around when I came out 40 years ago; of course these women weren't even born yet.

[@hanaryukoku]

This was the only episode that got me spiralling. At once saying the lesbian dating pool is painfully small, but then also saying that she wouldn’t date anyone new to coming out felt like a kick in the face. You do you girlie, as usual, but oof, the contradiction 😗

[@Justaspectator_]

Fr fr!!

[@L._._]

I didn’t understand it like that. I think she was saying that she doesn’t always wanna be that person teaching … situation to situation. I think that’s fair .

[@BluePatriotWinner]

We all go through periods in life that make you not the best person to be dating a just out lesbian. For both parties. I appreciate the honesty if done with compassion that Jordan seemed to show.

[@GayIRL]

Love this so much, Jordan Harvey has such good chemistry!

[@mayadev1338]

She talked in an amazing way .....just loved this show ....many question has been answered through real experience

[@slat13]

Jordan is so knowledgeable and and it is so refreshing to hear her talk because she is so opened about her experiences.

[@uscitizen3252]

Another great podcast. Thanks so much!

[@Official-EuniceUg]

I loved this one, it's true there too many expectations on who does what

[@user-yt5cd7bd5s]

You might be a late addition to this world but you'll take it by storm, I feel! Please continue to use your powers for good! On a different note, it is so crushing (and necessary) to be reminded, through your guests, of the hardship we all have to go through to just... be! It's such a common theme across all accounts: teenagers terrified to be outed, rejected by family and peers, with personal safety, mental health and career on the line. We really do play life on hard more!

[@nicoleleus1]

I’m soooo excited for this episode 🎉

[@sayheytosid]

This was such a great episode! Love hearing about other queer ppl's struggles when it comes to dating.

[@mswiss3994]

My favourite guest so far - Jordan Harvey is adorable 🥰

[@melissap7790]

OBSESSED! Why am I just discovering this content now! Love the energy, laughter and real talk! I'm a new subscriber fromLondon! 🇬🇧🏳‍🌈🔝

[@Daphnefav]

Tik tok brought me here I enjoy this ep a lot 🌟💞Its really hard to always be the person who make the first move😭love straight women bad.

[@BluePatriotWinner]

Yeah straight married women too😭

[@iamzulfiyamusic]

These episodes are so lovely 🤍🤍🤍

[@ukpuze5289]

I really enjoyed this podcast. Thank you ❤

[@i.1213]

These girls have been so entertaining… nice job…

[@user-qp3tm8kv3b]

As a baby lesbian in the dating world, I find this video very helpful. It solved my questions in just a few minutes ❤❤❤

[@junevertucci3420]

Another great episode.

[@Michelle7-n4k]

It’s the irony of being bound at “Liberty University “ for me.🤷🏾‍♀️

[@giselevelazquez3312]

I like that y’all have been adding picture and videos

[@someonesomehow379]

OMG yess 16:00 in high school I thought I’d graduate, get to uni, then the gays would appear 😭 well that did NOT happen so as a freshman in college I was constantly searching for the gays as a closeted -for safety- lesbian.. and let me tell u it’s difficult 😭 but now I found some gays through a friend that goes to a different uni and has gay friends so I was like um guess whattt I’m gay and I want to get to know the local gays.. so yeah it’s dope also guys there is hope trust me you are NOT the only gay/queer person no matter where u are I’m in the middle east gurl and there are queers here like I knew we have an underground gay scene u just have to find a way to get to it lol

[@NanceN_12]

I had a two cousins who also attended liberty University, they are both Christian and only lasted a year. They said they couldn’t do it. One of them actually had to leave because she got pregnant by her now husband. But the rules were too much…Now I know why. Great conversation. I relate so much to Mal with the experience of femme presenting and being in the queer community.

[@cryptochrome3090]

I’ve been enjoying this podcast a lot!

[@Rainbowpink05]

I listened to you guys every night before bed love what you guys talk about…

[@mooremindfulmoments6599]

Ok I live under a rock…but who is Jordan harvey? She’s so charismatic and humorous! :)

[@minayuen4775]

Thank you for making this podcast! 🌿

[@marinarivero9742]

loved this episode!

[@jessicatjoa3573]

she just called me out in everything she says LMAO

[@Official-EuniceUg]

I feel like we should talk more about dealing with family pressure

[@lyssasletters3232]

Loving this podcast ❤❤❤❤

[@priscilla182]

i loved so much this episode and i had so much fun listening LOL thanks alot!

[@user-le9jt8rv8d]

Love your podcast ❤❤❤

[@katnev7499]

Have literally watched all you're podcasts, some a few times over. I love what you're doing with this and the relevance it has. I listen and go back through the different periods of my life and go "yes" through something that I have or currently experience! I do get a bit jealous of the fact I live in a part of Australia and our dating pool is non existent. I'm struggling to make Friends in the queer community being a lesbian. There is just no where to go to meet unless you're in certain areas of the country which is unattainable for most. I want to just organise a big long weekend holiday at a resort or camping where queer people from all over can come and meet, enjoy different activities and make memories although I don't have the skills to be able to organise that. I'm literally looking if they have these things overseas that I could go to. I'm going to the next Matilda's (soccer) match and that's pretty much the only lesbian event I know of where multiple lesbians will be... Sad I know but so true. Mardi gras in Sydney is another but it's once a year. Matilda's is multiple occasions. Keep doing a Killa job on your podcast and I'll be one of the first to listen to any content that comes out. 🏳️‍🌈👸🇦🇺😊

[@personone8415]

Favorite pod cast so far !!❤. Fems are tricky . I can defiantly see the struggle with mistaken as hetro. I give off a masculine vibe but a lot of times its not obvious. I used to be picked up by guys. What is your advise to older leabians that never had a girlfriend? I was asked about my last relationship ... i was embarrassed to say not in a while.

[@ProductDesignKF]

you sould link the guest's socials in the description

[@MadeItOutPodcast]

Thank you for the feedback! Here’s her handle @jordan.Harvey

[@rozemarijnbalemans4561]

Love her! Also, I am a Femme that loves pursuing people. My current very masc presenting partner was definitely picked up by me in bar, not vice versa 😊

[@regularmethod]

Jordan was like the CIA of lesbians at Liberty.

[@yeseniaesparza]

I also went to Liberty 😭

[@veronicaaristeguieta3072]

Love the energy! Love this, would love to see something about being neurodivergent (autistic/ADHD/genetic stuff), and dating as a sapphic (lesbian or bi) woman, which this podcast and getting it in my feed again has got me questioning again if I’d like to date women, never mind that I’ve never had any significant dating experience of any kind but plenty of other gay/lesbian and trans friends at my little liberal arts college (except difficult to meet anyone who I’m not already friends with and might make it awkward). And that makes dating people of all genders really difficult. Hopefully not an overshare because I do that a lot.

[@becominge]

I’ve been out for 15 years or so… and the one thing Ive always struggled with was finding queer friends… to this day… I have 1 who lives across the country!

[@akohimuyun]

“How can you find gay friend?” Girls, they are all here listening to the podcast hahaha

[@mojai11]

No pressure; but keep it up!❤🎉😊

[@mrc2205]

A lot of fems think the more masculine one is going to be more forward about asking the other out and so on. Asking a lady out is really hard. I wish this sort of stuff was around when I was younger. Would have saved me a lot of time.

[@_DivineTruth_is_Home_]

Thank you ❤

[@SierraAspenAutumn]

I am taking noootes ✍🏽 Apparently I'm oblivious. Lmao

[@skidadleskadoodle9358]

the catfish story was WILD😭

[@briceidaperez5856]

What.... I didn't know about the ig thing 😅

[@jadablue3760]

why does she still have all the apps though 💀

[@mirelajaksic3093]

I wait a game on the end 😅

[@Saturdaymorningpoems]

Mal you look so gorgeous 💖

[@katiepoxter9105]

Not just that it’s Liberty, but you’re in Lynchburg which is a dry county.

[@paulabillings1890]

18:24 it is difficult. I'm from Jamaica and it's so alone here being a lesbian and one that's not into parties or into being sex buddies 🙄. I really wish i had some gay friends.

[@AlidaNicole-ff7hi]

Ghost or U-haul 😅

[@ashleyG92892]

Any advice for later in life lesbians?

[@cocainekeiko]

Kohhh back.

[@erin-darbym.6444]

omg liBERTY va represent

[@ilanieb2423]

Is Jordan a Leo?😂

[@winec00ler]

Hi Ladies! SoCal based Graphic Designer. 😉

[@Raddiebaddie]

If ur catfished you can leave omg horrible 😂 and especially better believe I’m telling the server our checks are separate 😂

[@jeuelfaith897]

Ana shumate next pliz

[@L._._]

Longer!!! lol

[@dannyadvice]

Does she have any social media instagram or sth?

[@tharangafernando2730]

Please invite christina and amber or one of them

[@stephaniewilson5513]

I realize you all are quite young, have you looked at this issue from the point of an older lesbian?

[@snorrevonflake]

16:21 Not sure why i am watching this as a straight man in this 50s but it has been the same for all of my life, where t f do i meet someone to match me.

[@TheTamiyaShow]

You need more ethnic people and the full spectrum of masc women. Not just SoCal types 😂