Crazy Senior Dating Expectations: “Nurse or a Purse” vs. “George Clooney”

[@denacollins352]

I was dating a really great guy who had a health condition. I decided that I liked him a continued dating for a while but as time went on he tried to make me a care giver. He became more and more helpless. I wanted to get to know someone and date. He wanted a mother. I felt bad but I couldn't give up my life. I'm still single but not a nurse or a purse.

[@karenlowes7802]

Then, there's dementia.

[@sherelljasper8837]

Good girl. They count on us thinking our options are scarce and we're one of the lucky ones

[@brittneysperspective8433]

@@sherelljasper8837Yup. That’s all this red pill craps goal. To convince women they are going to be old and miserable, If they don’t accept “men” in ANY condition. 😂 The truth is, those “men” are the ones old, alone and miserable. Desperate and looking for women to help them. Happiness is a choice. It’s a state of mind. If you got your health and can pay your bills, you should be happy.

[@kathleengivant-taylor2277]

Good points and very understandable.

[@blacknnatural]

This guy is on point. I realize at 57 that no guy is going to have a washboard stomach, but I need someone who has some level of self-care.

[@Alan1234x]

I’m 59 and my stomach is in damn good shape. Don’t give up hope.

[@andrearoberts2776]

I’m a widow, it’s only been nine months since my husband died so I’m not even close to ready to date. People are starting to ask if I would consider it though so it’s been in my mind. I’ll be 65 soon and have wondered if physical appearance is as important to men my age as it was when I was younger. I remember being judged and sometimes being found lacking, don’t think I have the patience for that any more. I’ve always focused more on the inner person, not their packaging. The thought of being judged by how I look at this age is kind of off putting.

[@Mockduck2020]

Andrea Roberts if you’re picture is any indication of how you look, you’re gorgeous!

[@jerrypeukert5732]

You look just fine.

[@dianaevans6725]

Yes! Appearance is VERY important!!

[@annwrog]

@@dianaevans6725 but many men in that age group don't look very good themselves. Some of them look really old and bad. I'm so over their expectations of a youthful appearance. It makes me quite angry to think that they want someone of a much younger age and a beautiful physical appearance.

[@annwrog]

I am a widow in my sixties and have been widowed for nine years. I am disgusted by the self-righteous and self entitled attitude of many older men. It makes me furious. Sad and upset.

[@joanjohnson9438]

Another wonderful show! Was married for 57 years & a widow for 4.... Yes in my senior years I would love to meet a man but always said.....they wanted a nurse & a purse......after just looking...companionship is so important to me....but it's really too late I think for me....but I can still look! Thanks for very informative subjects you always contribute....Bless you, Joan

[@soblessed4844]

Find church members, family members, make new friends, reconnect with old friends, get a dog, there’s so many ways that you can find companionship… Taking the risk of being with a man who has an unknown history, baggage, health issues, emotional temperament that you know nothing about…is not worth the Drama. Stay stress free 🧘🏽‍♀️.

[@redsloane879]

Nurse WITH a purse, is the saying I've heard. And it does seem men of 60 want to date women in their late 30s at the oldest....it puffs their fragile egos. I no longer have the interest nor the energy to meet new ppl! 🙄 Great and interesting video, thank you Margaret! Hugs from 🇨🇦💕

[@watchmanonthewall14]

Men want the best deal they can get. Same for women. Regardless of age, age difference, or generation. It's always been that way, and it will always be that way. If you no longer have the interest or energy, then being single is right for you.

[@craigyoung3124]

Fragile egos? Your response about men in general is toxic femininity and is why you're single. Men want youth and women want security.

[@monalisa233]

I did some online dating. I met some strange ones but also some really nice ones. 2 of my girlfriends met and married men from online dating app. They are still together years later. I had quit the sites and unexpectedly met a man at a party. I didn't expect to meet someone in my late 50's but here we are! He is 4 years younger. We both have good jobs and i have kids and he never did. He is ok with being a grandfather. I think it just depends on who you meet. I don't know that I need to remarry but we live together now and are quite enjoying life! Surprises are out there.

[@nomessnostress]

❤❤❤

[@katiadelrieu5621]

Lovely. I agree with you. There are some good men out there. Live yiur lufe as best you can and see what happens:)

[@dewuknowofHyMn]

Im 62...hubby passed 6 years ago....he was sick w one thing or another for the last 5 years he was alive....he is still my love and have ABSOLUTELY NO DESIRE for another.....🤪🙃😉

[@jerrypeukert5732]

So why here?

[@amyjacquelineg.715]

The overly used “walks in the beach”…when you live in a state without a beach!!😁

[@watchmanonthewall14]

I tried the online thing about 15 years ago. Lots of whack jobs out there. The reason I am replying to you is the "walks on the beach" quip. Can't tell you how many profiles I read about women loving those walks on the beach. I hated it. Of course, who doesn't like to walk on the beach? It goes without saying, doesn't it? Besides, the real work of a good relationship, day to day, has little to do with walks on the beach. Thank you for letting me get that off my chest. Peace.

[@annwrog]

Another one of my favorites, "I like 'cuddling on the couch' (while watching a movie)." I am very glad everyone has a couch and not just a love seat, LOL!! 😃😄😂

[@annwrog]

'with a glass of wine, by candlelight.' I can smell it now..~

[@lindapettigrew3890]

I found that men on dating sites often don’t read the profile we take such care to write. They determine interest solely based on profile pictures! 😞

[@jerrypeukert5732]

Women don't?

[@annwrog]

@@jerrypeukert5732, yes they do, but most women read the profiles.

[@kathybrem880]

Yep, I agree

[@kathybrem880]

@@jerrypeukert5732I’d be more interested in character than looks

[@PammyR56]

When ppl say nurse it’s not just about physical activity… they want you to clean up after them and do their laundry and so on. Every man I have come across has wanted me to pay for everything, move into my beautiful house and live for free, and look after him like a mother so I gave up. I was a slave for 25 years but no more.

[@lorrainedempsey3320]

It is very sad that you allowed that.

[@dw5294]

All the men I've met have always paid for everything on every date. They also planned the dates. They just weren't right for me. I need a man who shares my same goals and beliefs.

[@FrancesHart99]

Single mature women don’t need to attract predators. Mentioning sex is a mistake, alluding to your genuine sensuality in the context of your favourite activities, may be more authentic and relatable.

[@maggiefry7304]

I have been thinking of trying online dating, but I haven't made myself sit down and do it. A few years ago, I started a profile on Okay Cupid for a freelance project I was working on. I never finished it, never added a photo or much beyond an email address, and I was FLOODED with requests for sex. They didn't even know what I looked like! Makes me a bit trepidatious.

[@ryanwalker3076]

Hello dear I would have loved us to chat and become friends, Hope to hear from you soon

[@maggiefry7304]

I finally did give online dating a try. In October, I signed up for Bumble and I met a really great guy. We canceled our memberships after a week and have been very happy in our pandemic pod for the last three months. He's no George Clooney, but we get together every other weekend to cook a nice meal and watch Marvel movies. It's very comfortable.

[@zickafoose]

You never know how soon you’ll be nurse!! Stay free!!

[@freerangeboogie7293]

I’m looking for MY nurse & a purse too! 🤗😆

[@kathybrem880]

Very true

[@anne-marielandry4465]

This was very interesting! I have never been comfortable with online dating. I’ve half heartedly tried a few times. As much as I love writing I have a hard time describing myself accurately. Another important thing is your username. That can attract unsavory attention too. So I’ve given up on meeting someone this way. I am open to meeting people in an old fashioned way but at 66 that is getting increasingly difficult. Good thing I love my own company 😎.

[@lovespurpleflowers]

It will be a cold day, way down south, before I would try online dating, this is from a sixty plus gal that has never married. Believe it or not, I have no regrets whatsoever! I was born and have lived in the S.F. Bay Area always, I would have to admit that I am more reserved than many of the folks that live here, I am probably more like someone from the Mid-West or the East, the gentleman was correct about most people putting "all their cards on the table" in this area! I really feel so fortunate to be content in my own skin, this is not to say that I do not enjoy friendships with men folk, I just happen to practice abstinence due to my faith based belief, as you might imagine, this means that I will be spending time with like minded souls, no need for misunderstandings! Interesting to hear all of your positions, thanks!

[@laurawalsh2829]

I abstain for the same reasons of faith, and I have a son - so I want to set a positive example for him about a woman -. if he even is interested in dating ( own interests & hobbies, which is great!)!! It isn’t just about me. Most men won’t want to bother with a woman like myself in online dating. They want friends with benefits - which translates to benefits for them. They don’t bring anything to the table.

[@doro8856]

Great show, Margaret. Great, helpful guests. More! More!

[@TheGgeenniiee]

They want a nurse WITH a purse

[@sandyf6215]

I loved this video, but I would never go online to meet someone. Creeps abound.

[@watchmanonthewall14]

The creepiest of creepers are lurking! Creepy men and crazy women.

[@VoiceoverMomentum]

If a guy won’t read my profile or just writes short answers, or says “I’ll tell you later” to everything, wrong for me! So many are like that.

[@paulacaffey6026]

I found the beginning of this discussion important, but I am very disappointed that a very critical issue of “the purse” was never really discussed. Women need to learn tactics to discern a man’s financial stability and independence. Plus, why stray into so many extra issues, such as living in Asia?

[@dloveofgod8269]

Very interesting topic Margaret. I did enjoy your having Ken in the conversation. I will preface my comments by saying the topic on dating over 50 was a bit of put off to me being 67 but I watched anyway & enjoyed it. I was very different in my 50s even early 50s to later 50s. Being in late 60s I have evolved to a different person. Not to say that all the points discussed aren't relevant as they are. Perhaps you're trying to cover a broader audience of women her being inclusive with 50s which there are some here. But, for me.....50s to 60s was a world of time, experiences, relationships, travel and lifestyle as well as life changes. Thank you for sharing the video with us. 💝

[@dixiesmom4633]

So well put. While I am fortunate to still have the love of my life 42 years later.....I have often said that the 50's to 60's decade was the biggest change I ever went through. It was like hitting a brick wall for me. Now I'm trying to deal with recent retirement and not having the energy I thought I would. Thank you for your comment.

[@watchmanonthewall14]

The 60s is sobering, isn't it?

[@carolkir]

In this discussion, you're amazing at avoiding the issues of being in the elder age range. Are you aware of this? Pile age onto some middling chronic disability--or embarrassing physiological changes (dentures, anyone? wig wearers?), and the overriding issue may become intimacy in a broader sense. Trust. Acceptance for who you are. Personality over activity, perhaps. It's a rich yet difficult area to explore in a forum like this. Thanks for the start!

[@lizasauniere5145]

It is really difficult to make general statements about dating and expectations for mature adults, everyone's health and habits are different. What I like about what was said in the video is that people need to tell truth about themselves and their expectations from a partner to find that best match.

[@soblessed4844]

After 50, most men are looking for a nurse, a purse, or a hospice wife. Nope, not me!!!! I’m doing me…🧘🏽‍♀️💃🏽family, friends, travel, hobbies, church, creative outlets, gym, theater, fine dining and arts, tranquility, clarity, and independence!

[@stephanied.k.3589]

I have always been in a community where I was an ethnic minority and found that you simply can't ignore the math. As we age there are simply more single women than men and we have to adjust if we want companionship of any kind. I have been a widow for 12 years and as of yet have no desire to be a nurse, purse, or lover but I have female family and friends that are! Online dating helps with the math but facilitating that first date between people you know but may not know one another is priceless.

[@lizasauniere5145]

No, you do not need to adjust yourself to something you don't like just to get companionship, it doesn't make any sense, It is better to be single.

[@feroziadollie6678]

Very very interesting !! Nurse or Purse ..

[@bridgethunt7836]

Nurse with a purse

[@Jane5720]

I am interested in dating and I do but I’m not interested in all that commitment of it. I just wanna have fun now. I spent years and years being a caregiver, Working jobs I don’t care for to build up my own portfolio for retirement so You can see why I’m not interested in being a caregiver or a purse. You really hear of a man caregiving for a woman and if they do they do it poorly because they don’t know how to do that.

[@Ruby-hu5wh]

Hi Margaret - thank you so much for this topic. i listened to David Wygant as your guest speaker on another video.. I was inspired and am finding an opportunity to try his suggestion - make myself more available by making eye contact, smiling more, and to pursue, approach, make the first move if i see someone i am interested in rather than wait for the man to approach me! I really like this idea, especially because time is passing by and David also said, there are men out there who are or may be tired of being rejected or are afraid of being rejected. I appreciate so much what Lisa and Ken each had to say about dating in this video. I value that each is presenting from opposite gender view points, both from their personal and professional experiences. I will watch more videos by David, Lisa and Ken to learn more How To's and may decide to contact them for more advice and help. 🌹Margaret, I selected this rose for you because it is beautiful like you. Thank you.

[@123456711751]

My husband and I are in our 60’s and retired, we both have chronic conditions that we keep under control.

[@redsloane879]

Excellent!! Happy and healthy retirement to you and your husband!!

[@123456711751]

BJ We have been married for 47 years, I just retired this year and he is a retired firefighter. I have to insist on him taking care of himself. The statistics show married men live longer!

[@freerangeboogie7293]

Here are some clues: a man I dated lost all his teeth by age 50 and has a big belly. This is due to drinking six pack of Coke every day for over 40 years & eats a lot of junk. He is an ex smoker because he knows most women won’t date him if he still smoked. He proudly states he has no retirement because he plans on working for the rest of his life. “Will take 3 jobs if I have to…”

[@watchmanonthewall14]

Wow. That man is a real prize!

[@soblessed4844]

@@watchmanonthewall14 men really do think they are apprised, even when they are past their prime, useless, riddled with health issues, emotionally, immature, bankrupt, and mostly homeless! The best thing to do is run the other way and stay free

[@Mellie726]

very interesting . thanks!

[@1960genius]

I loved this video! The gentleman was very straight forward.

[@nevertooold6498]

I agree with Ken regarding bringing up the sex issue in the profile. I'm from the east coast, and I believe most men want to know how soon they can expect sex from a woman, and according to my single friends, it comes up very, very early when dating. Letting them know up front is smart and can avoid attracting men just looking for sex - and yes, it does exist. Even though you would think they are creating profiles for a future with someone, sex is extremely important to them (and not just men), and quite a few men do not want to wait. So it's better to clear it up before they contact a woman. I thought the point about liking the same type of humor was so interesting and reminded me of a tactic I used years ago. Before I met my husband, I had tried some personal ad dating (this was before the internet was a big thing). When I spoke to the men on the phone I would bring up the topic of comedians and always said, "My favorite comedic actor and stand-up comic is Robin Williams", if I received a negative response, I knew right there that it wouldn't work in the long run. The reason was two-fold. It had to do with comedy and intelligence. I always thought Robin Williams was very funny, and his wit and comedy was also fast-paced and cerebral; if the guy didn't like or get his comedy, the relationship would eventually fail. I still strongly believe in using this type of 'barometer' in order to weed out people that you may be attracted to superficially and not waste time (and sometimes heartache - on both ends).

[@jacoblogan5798]

i use to like Robin Williams lol Hyd? i'd like to chat to you privately

[@elisabethsiadous3]

I'm not concerned but many young friends in their 20s 30s 40s told me they are so disappointed by those sites too ! Both the girls and boys say people are just looking for one-night stands. Finally some of them subscribed to a good old wedding agency with an actual office...I teased them, so rétro of you young people... 2 of them are now into a happy relationship. So, elderly ladies, why not follow the example of thèse youngsters ? At least thèse agencies screen and "weed" their members. Good luck !

[@watchmanonthewall14]

Never too old, obviously you've put a lot of thought into this. Hope all is going well for you.

[@mindymaniego777]

Profiles written on online dating may not reflect the through person on their pretty photos. May actually be different from a well written profile..It would be better to meet the person and play it by ear.

[@donnadornbusch6738]

Great interview

[@mommaoinnh2674]

Had a guy who lived in walking distance ask me over to watch a movie at 10pm. I suggested we meet the next night at 7 for dinner. We never got together. Obvious to me he just wanted a booty call, not a woman in his life.

[@JoinTheJourneyToday]

One more man telling women what they should think… it’s annoying and exhausting. No thanks

[@jerrypeukert5732]

You probably aren't a nurse or purse, but maybe a curse.

[@watchmanonthewall14]

The single life for you makes many people happy.

[@sophiam9886]

I am 49 and I, specifically, came here to listen to what single women older than me are dealing with in the dating market. I, also, wanted to hear what the man had to offer to the conversation. I had high hopes before I clicked on the video but...😅 Welp. It seems that all m¤les, no matter what generation they're in, actually have the same borg hive mind. They all think that making excuses for themselves coupled with telling us what to do will fix all relationship and dating problems. Lmfao! 🙃🤣🤣

[@Anchor5777]

There was a guy on eharmony and he said on his profile he was 5' 10 so when I met him and I am 5' 7, he was shorter than me and he said to me, "you are so tall." I told him that he stated he was 5' 10 and dhe said that he guessed he strunk. I was disappointed because I specifically put the height range that I was interested in.

[@kathybrem880]

I’m not interested in physical relationship. Possibly if I actually met someone I could love that could change

[@feroziadollie6678]

Please send your Site ? Wish to join.

[@dloveofgod8269]

Margaret mentioned their sites toward the end and they were on the screen too. Maybe rewatch & write it down from there.

[@jammehsingbeh4855]

What is the male guest relationship websites

[@123456711751]

Even though I am married, I enjoyed watching!

[@jerrypeukert5732]

Getting the itch maybe?

[@azraelinarakoczy7862]

I don't agree with this. Everyone has a type, both man and woman. If you're not physically attracted to someone, then why go out with someone that there's not physical attraction. If a woman is attracted to a man who looks like George Clooney , so what ? What's wrong with that ? Everyone has a specific type, and this goes for any age and any gender male or female. Because if there's no chemistry, then why bother. I would rather be alone than lower my standards just for the sake of getting to know someone.

[@HettiedeKorteDiplomaat]

I’m looking for a funny man. One who can make me laugh.

[@watchmanonthewall14]

Humor is a tricky thing, with so many nuances to it. There's too many people that THINK they are funny but are not.

[@mechthildhaeussler5736]

I would be very much disappointed to find out that my date has not written his/her profile by himself - being a good writer says so much about a personality and I do not imagine a relationship with a bad writer.

[@vanessalittle-sellers7981]

I’ve supported three men….still with #3!! I’d like a man to take care of me and I mean every aspect….not just financially!! My fault!! Too late for a miracle I guess😏 I don’t need attacks please!!

[@Me-mn4nw]

If you're not dead there is still time. I just found a real man (69) and I'm 62. We met at the Gym and are very active. We in fact do go mountain climbing and 4 wheeling while traveling.

[@Somepeoplecallmelyn]

Falling apart lol

[@theresamorales143]

im 53 im hoping for my dream mam .

[@jerrypeukert5732]

Keep hope alive

[@lorrainedempsey3320]

Good luck!

[@2011littlejohn1]

I would appreciate an answer to my below comment. I'm very active, travel world wide, live alone, play in 3 rock bands and like strong independent women. Being mothered would be anathema to me. But - on line dating is for the birds and con men (I've a degree in English Literatures so my profiles are fine). I'm 79 but people think I'm about 60 when I bash out Route 66 or Honky Tonk Women. The best place to meet women is socially at gigs but they are mainly young ones. Why don't single older women put themselves about a bit - even go out alone or maybe they do and I just don't frequent the places they hang out at? Should I start skulking in charity shops, garden centres, etc rather than in social places because at the moment I feel rather emasculated.

[@sixtyandme]

What is your question?

[@sophiam9886]

​@sixtyandme Lol. I think he wants to know where he should go to find single older women. He said a whole lot of extra stuff, though.😁🤭

[@2011littlejohn1]

@@sophiam9886 Ok you got the gist so what's your suggestion? Coincidentally 3 days ago I met a drop dead Ukrainian girl I hadn't seen for a few years ( I live in Prague) and she suggested a date the next day but stood me up. I've no idea why and it was her idea in the first place? :)

[@Chiron952]

lol you look every bit of 80. No one would have a hard time believing that. Also you just listed out 2 places that you've noticed older women gathered as well if you were genuinely lamenting not finding older women lol