Why do people dislike the INTJ personality type? | CS Joseph Responds

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C.S. Joseph

C.S. Joseph

Күн бұрын

CS Joseph responds to the question why do people dislike the INTJ personality type?
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Пікірлер: 900
@cirquebeat
@cirquebeat 4 жыл бұрын
Me: *having a nice day* KZbin recommendations: *why everybody dislikes you ^^*
@Riiiiiingo
@Riiiiiingo 4 жыл бұрын
Had a giggle, ty
@lunahelena5329
@lunahelena5329 4 жыл бұрын
yeah, YT cares to make us humble ;) let’s thank for that! :D
@amoore2165
@amoore2165 4 жыл бұрын
Lol
@uchi5171
@uchi5171 4 жыл бұрын
"Cries in fi child"
@wraitheory
@wraitheory 4 жыл бұрын
I can walk this off... IT'S FINE!
@mj1472
@mj1472 4 жыл бұрын
"When you're arrogant, people want to tear you down, but when you're humble, people want to raise you up" This doesn't sound completely true to me. As an INTJ, my experience has been that half the time when I showed sympathy, people would just say that I wasn't doing it in the right way, or saw it as a moment of weakness and tried to tear me down. Only when I make my competence clear and become emotionless and cold do I get any respect. I am open to criticism, as I always want to improve. But people think introverts are weak and will take advantage of how timid we initially come off. I'm tired of it.
@victorianastav4969
@victorianastav4969 4 жыл бұрын
yes, they think we are weak but we are the very will full. I'm tired of it too
@morpheusmirror2857
@morpheusmirror2857 4 жыл бұрын
Extroverts are blind and send out emotional pings to understand and or manipulate others via their self projection.
@qwertyasd889
@qwertyasd889 4 жыл бұрын
Hell yes!!!
@stalkerwoman99iserrom20
@stalkerwoman99iserrom20 4 жыл бұрын
I think there is a "socially acceptable humility" that is neither vulnerability ( that is basically showing people your true feeling and it's not recomended) or doing too many favours to others or feeling inferior. It' s more like being able to keep an " approachable " self image and giving off an " i am neither better or worse than you" vibe , i don't know if it makes sense XD
@farissaadeh2997
@farissaadeh2997 4 жыл бұрын
depends on the people you are hanging around. Im my experience humbleness is really effective with people you are working long-term. Because initially they may think you are incompetent, but when they just see you producing result after result AND STILL BE HUMBLE about it, they will lift you up.
@SunscreenAndVitamins
@SunscreenAndVitamins 4 жыл бұрын
I am an INTJ raised by a narcissistic ESFP who expected me to mirror her behavior. As long as I did, I got along relatively okay. As soon as I dropped that and became myself, I realized I don't like people in general and they only like me when I pretend to be someone else. I find people exhausting and unrewarding. They are punitive if you do not wish to engage.
@Alberto-ku2yu
@Alberto-ku2yu 4 жыл бұрын
I had the exact same thing happening to me im not kidding, what i did was stop giving a shit about people and just doing mi own and soon people who never respected me started to do it, and i stoped giving then the respect that thay didnt deserve.
@barrydworak
@barrydworak 4 жыл бұрын
Where do I find women like you? Misanthropic INTJs could be an ISTP's soul mate, especially when both were raised by narcs.🙂
@karendoyle7999
@karendoyle7999 4 жыл бұрын
Because they radiate the above.
@di3486
@di3486 4 жыл бұрын
Exactly the same happened to this INFJ with an ISFJ mom.
@SunscreenAndVitamins
@SunscreenAndVitamins 4 жыл бұрын
@@di3486 I feel you. ISFJs are nightmares to begin with.
@gomonkeyfly
@gomonkeyfly 4 жыл бұрын
Q: why most ppl dislike X? A: X dislike most ppl.
@abesapien9930
@abesapien9930 4 жыл бұрын
Overall, INTJ's are pretty "dope," as you would say. They're brave enough to tell you your idea sucks, but they also have a romantic, altruistic, and philosophical core that's really attuned to wanting to do what's right. I knew one INTJ who described himself as a "warrior poet." Fierce yet romantic.
@CSJoseph
@CSJoseph 4 жыл бұрын
True that
@laurenneloms7953
@laurenneloms7953 4 жыл бұрын
I really like INTJs.
@meagiesmuse2334
@meagiesmuse2334 4 жыл бұрын
Ime, they have their own ideas of "doing what's right" and that can be totally opposite to what most people would think of as right. They may not offer to tell you that they hold different ethical values either, so you can be badly hurt.
@andreagreenwood93
@andreagreenwood93 3 жыл бұрын
@@meagiesmuse2334 That comment is dead-on. Never seen a comment talking about that aspect before but it's really a true insight.
@meagiesmuse2334
@meagiesmuse2334 3 жыл бұрын
@@andreagreenwood93 - I got that insight the hard way. I would advise any woman in love with an INTJ to ask questions, lots of them. For one example, do not assume they use the same definition of "cheating" that everyone else does. Don't accept vague answers either, because even simple words may not mean what you think they do.
@manzanaturqueza
@manzanaturqueza 4 жыл бұрын
When someone likes me I feel that’s only because they can’t see me clearly, it’s like: -I love you -Oh no, that’s because I’ve been FAKE AGAIN
@kleineapfelblute2456
@kleineapfelblute2456 4 жыл бұрын
- Oh no, believe me I do, stop pretending. You might look like an asshole to lots of other people, but maybe these are not the people you should stick to in the first place. Those, who are meant to notice who you are, will notice and appreciate you for the person you are, but be courageous enough to accept and actually deal with it. At least, I've been there several times and I always ended up discovering, that INTJs are pretty much the biggest sweethearts out there. Yours sincerely, an INFP :)
@mbtisocialclub
@mbtisocialclub 4 жыл бұрын
As an INTJ I secretly like people, but then I start engaging with others and trying to understand others but when I demand for the same thing back, they don’t want to be changed while they themselves expect you to change. So I give up. I’d rather be liked by a select few who like me for me then be liked by lots of people and slowly chip away at my personality
@supergeeky7529
@supergeeky7529 3 жыл бұрын
For me it's like I like people, as long as they aren't too close to me. I prefer when they mostly ignore me and I mostly ignore them. I don't want people harmed, just not near me
@bananabomb3846
@bananabomb3846 3 жыл бұрын
This.
@sareasarea3311
@sareasarea3311 3 жыл бұрын
100%
@codeninja100
@codeninja100 3 жыл бұрын
So true they only want to be heard by you mostly but then become a wall when it’s your time to reciprocate
@sthoughtsarchive2791
@sthoughtsarchive2791 3 жыл бұрын
CHUCCH! Btw, were You a PUA?
@lightgrey5365
@lightgrey5365 4 жыл бұрын
Dear INTJs, I love you all. Sometimes to my own disadvantage. - an INFP
@noraflood6482
@noraflood6482 4 жыл бұрын
Same! Why do we love INTJs so much?! -another INFP
@KUKAKYOTOTOKYO
@KUKAKYOTOTOKYO 4 жыл бұрын
Aw, same. ❤️ -an INTJ
@mm764
@mm764 4 жыл бұрын
Eh I love hate intj
@wraitheory
@wraitheory 4 жыл бұрын
Lightgrey, don't sweat it too much. A lot of us INTJ's probably don't receive such sentiments often. My hope is that the ones, nearest you, demonstrate just how appreciated you are, in kind.
@lightgrey5365
@lightgrey5365 4 жыл бұрын
@@wraitheory :')
@sydneychuke1288
@sydneychuke1288 4 жыл бұрын
Why do people dislike INTJs? The world thrives in self deprecation, and INTJs don't do that. Even when INTJs show love and gratitude, they are still hated because they aren't doing it the way they are EXPECTED to.
@seabeejg
@seabeejg 3 жыл бұрын
My brother is a 34 year old INTJ. He is very independent in his head and at times in practice, but expects everyone to take care of him like he's entitled to it or something. I've given him years of sound advice to get out and explore the world and gain experiences. I'm an INTP, so it hits him deep down inside his insecure core when I lay it out straight forward, but he would never accept that I, or likely anyone, has anything of real value when it comes to intelligence. Perhaps I'm just not 'doing it the way he EXPECTS it to be.' He's adamant about having seen the world and experienced it all, though he's only lived with our mother or father, with the exception of sleeping on so-called friends' couches for several month stretches while they take advantage of him and coax him into doing stupid shit. He is super arrogant, even acknowledging it at times......with more arrogance. I love him.....but I don't know what to do anymore but to distance myself from him as much as possible and let his arrogance figure it out. Outside of this, he is very intelligent, but almost always omits, ignores, or otherwise disregards fundamental or crucial information to manifest his visions/innovations. If I try to suggest ideas, he's very confrontational and/or doubles down. Other INTJs I know are basically similar, although not as "bad." How is this some "master race" bullshit many of you talk about? It's pathetic. It's so much lost potential. I have my own bullshit, but I try. I played sports, I joined the military at 17 just to get the hell out of the house and out into the world, I lift weights and eat relatively healthy, I try to engage with the world and understand others better, etc. He and I could really do some damage if some of these things were addressed. But I'm exhausted giving a damn.
@seabeejg
@seabeejg 3 жыл бұрын
@oopsieloopsy Like I said, the insecure core.
@seabeejg
@seabeejg 3 жыл бұрын
@oopsieloopsy Annnnnnd, there it is.
@seabeejg
@seabeejg 3 жыл бұрын
@oopsieloopsy Glad you did some lazy, incomplete research.
@seabeejg
@seabeejg 3 жыл бұрын
@oopsieloopsyCongratulations, you "trained" with some degenerate, couch potato reservists for a pathetic statist system.
@veronicajean3612
@veronicajean3612 4 жыл бұрын
My intj son was misunderstood from the age of 2 on. I get him. I am an infj. I also am not bothered by his lack of sympathy. I knew how he got there. He will call me back and tell me he is sorry for xyz. Because I am not demanding his gratitude and sympathy. He is very loyal and trustworthy. If an intj trusts you . It is a great person you get. Not everyone is privileged with that.
@remasiu8029
@remasiu8029 4 жыл бұрын
I'm an intj with an infj daughter. She has always been my most challenging child. The one thing I did was always love her. Yes it was hard for me because I have high expectations for my children. But I refused to give up on her. I just figured do everything I could for her so that I know I did everything I could. And if there's anyone in this world I love it's my children. Watching this video I know I'm a humble intj. I have dealt with severe abuse as a child and young adult. I never thought about it until now. But it gives me more understanding of myself. But I love infjs. Good job momma.
@devinmoran59
@devinmoran59 4 жыл бұрын
I have an infj pops and our relationship is very similar. Infj's are amazing people. He truly understands how my brian is wired and when seemingly nice people try and take advantage of him it makes my blood boil
@quintuplebanned4267
@quintuplebanned4267 4 жыл бұрын
Veronica Jean I admire their ability to be direct, without being malicious, or arrogant, or generally attaching any emotional baggage. They appear arrogant, at times, but they aren’t, they just know they are usually right and have the confidence to prove it. They are also quite open to criticism. They take it very well. Very objectively. -INFJ
@helialycoris4464
@helialycoris4464 3 жыл бұрын
Haha I wish my parents would be more understanding. I've always been waiting for the day I could give my loyalty to someone, the person I could give me trust to however, there is no one. Everyone just bring me down saying I need to talk to people more, I need to be more sympathetic, I need to show more emotions (cuz I'm female). Like why can't you accept me. I already struggle with bullying even when I don't act myself. It's so freaking hard that people can't accept me for who I am. I'm an INTJ and this struggle is real.
@qasimimtiaz9668
@qasimimtiaz9668 Жыл бұрын
infjs are most toxic people out there.
@xNerdkatViruskat
@xNerdkatViruskat 4 жыл бұрын
Hello dear INTJ. Your personality type is one of the most fascinating types I have read, saw, and heard about. Nothing can't replace your creative ideas and philosophical thoughts. To me, your melancholic souls shows your beauty and honesty in this world. Just like sweet bitter chocolate.
@lxdm26
@lxdm26 4 жыл бұрын
Fi child has been the bane of my existence. People stating INTJ to be emotionless are blatantly ignorant and/or mistyped. It's very easy to get emotionally overwhelmed if emotions aren't consciously held in check. Not expressing sympathy towards others does have other reasons, too. Often it's matter of 'why bother?' There's such an abstract emotional mess inside of us, which needs to be observed and curated before expression. People having literal attention spans of 5 seconds, just seeing their gaze start to drift losing interest after you just started to speak after all that work is just plain discouraging, painful and only makes it worse. It's not out of superiority. I know I'm terrible at expressing myself. The last thing I want is to bore you. God forbid. Furthermore I'm very ashamed of past narcissistic behaviour. I may add that I've experienced Fi narcissism to mostly stem from overcompensation. Past failures, the constant dread of underperforming combined with being misunderstood by, subjectively, everyone make it difficult to form a healthy moral base from which to draw ambitions from. Gratefulness and humility are changing my life. The greatest challenge for me has been the aforementioned negative effect of Si demon on Fi Child. Faith is the way. Fe trickster & Se inferior have always been there and once you know they're there, they become easier to deal with. Embracing social mishaps, awkwardness and embarrassements and laughing them off is also very, very liberating. To up it a notch, sharing embarassing moments with others and allowing oneself to show weakness is an absolute power move. Ironically it comes across and charming and humble (because it is) (who would've thought?) (btw this form of showing weakness is NOT drowning in self-pity like our cousins, the ISFPs, pathetic.gif) Also, organizing thoughts like this in journals or in KZbin comments is a tremendous way of clearing out mental fog. Thank you for coming to my TedxTalk. It's been a pleasure talking to myself again. (Maybe there could be some kind of a forum for correctly typed people to exchange these sorts of ideas in their own, personality-type-specific, way 🤔) Thank you, Chase. Your work has been very, very enlightening. One day, I'll thank you personally! sincerely, Alex, INTJ Masterrace
@CSJoseph
@CSJoseph 4 жыл бұрын
You are most welcome
@jameslucas129
@jameslucas129 4 жыл бұрын
" People having literal attention spans of 5 seconds, just seeing their gaze start to drift losing interest after you just started to speak after all that work is just plain discouraging, painful and only makes it worse." THIS!!! Like, I am all ready to analyze the situation in order to provide a solution, but they don't want one. Or if I want to share a similar personal experience they can't be bothered.
@aplethoraofme2056
@aplethoraofme2056 4 жыл бұрын
James Lucas sigh *people*
@Zpaaztyk
@Zpaaztyk 4 жыл бұрын
ISFPs are actually very similar to these descriptions. However, I am working on that self-pity part. Thanks for pointing that out.
@marialeon6765
@marialeon6765 4 жыл бұрын
I wasn't arrogant or narcissistic, I was raised in a way that I thought everyone was equal, so I thought I could talk about my interests freely. Also, it was hard for me to figure out when I was being taken advantage of, especially from school mates, they hated me putting boundaries (like, do your part of the work) and were harsh critics towards me (why you stand like that, why you like that, what's the use of doing that - YOU'RE NOT MORE THAN THE REST) and I was like "but, that's not what I mean." I tried to be more like them and I just became more bitter and no matter what I did, I was always wrong. One day I said, you know what, f*ck it, and I stopped caring because it was too tiring trying to be "normal." Edit: I'm also autistic, so, a terrible scenario for me.
@ahmadalhamad1
@ahmadalhamad1 4 жыл бұрын
First of all I would like to salute you Joseph you’re doing a great job and I appreciate your efforts. One point that I would like to raise is the word narcissist arguably may not be the word that describe INTJs. We are more of an elitists and perfectionists who looks down to people for a number of reasons.
@CSJoseph
@CSJoseph 4 жыл бұрын
Very well said
@jameslucas129
@jameslucas129 4 жыл бұрын
Thank you for pointing this out, those are much more accurate terms.
@maschinensohn
@maschinensohn 3 жыл бұрын
I cannot relate to narcissistic traits at all. I do not have the motivation to be part of a group, so I don't even get to the point where I would think of myself as more important than others. There are no others in my world except the few I chose to be in my life - and they are all better than myself. I would feel like a fraud if I would think of me as more valuable than another person, since I am aware that we all have our strength and weaknesses.
@kanarip8798
@kanarip8798 3 жыл бұрын
Example number 11,000 of being misunderstood
@elypelowski5670
@elypelowski5670 4 жыл бұрын
Wait, you mean this whole time people haven't liked me and I am just finding out about this now ??? Meh .. eff them all I don't need them :p
@quinnrouse3520
@quinnrouse3520 3 жыл бұрын
This guy is like the dad of INTJs. INTJs: “We are so great!😘” This guy: “Keep it in your pants!” INTJs: ”Fiiiiiinnnneee!😒”
@shoeberrypie
@shoeberrypie 2 жыл бұрын
I wish my ENTP friend was more like that. He still has a way to go before he's anywhere close to C.S. Joseph's level, and always accuses me of not respecting him every time I revert from "friendly" ESFP Subconscious to my actual Ego. I've probably not going to tell him my Ego is his Unconscious anytime soon, lmao
@jeromeblacq7528
@jeromeblacq7528 4 жыл бұрын
Of course, learning makes INTJ happy, according to you, INTJ purpose in life is to master all learning
@gottesurteil3201
@gottesurteil3201 4 жыл бұрын
I think you are quite right in saying we are ones to cut corners. That said, to assert "learning makes us truly happy" I believe is a very INTJ thing to say. I think we want to keep up the appearance of being intellectually honest when I think much of my success in appearing intellectual comes down to knowing how to manipulate people. I'm always saying "they like me now until they find out who I really am." It gets to a point sometimes where I actually cringe when someone praises me for being smart. I try to earn the right to be considered "intellectual/academic" but sometimes it is so easy to just read a subject at surface level and pass off for an expert.
@Sam-by3kk
@Sam-by3kk 4 жыл бұрын
This! I cringe when people call me super clever or smart. I'm not unintelligent, but I'm usually just good at absorbing the surface level of a lot of subjects. INTJs seem to be jack of all trades but other INTJs I've met, myself included, when you dive deep their knowledge of a subject isn't usually super deep. Can be though, depends on how passionate they really are about it and if they feel it's beneficial/defeats nihilism in their life a little.
@Terror_Rick
@Terror_Rick 3 жыл бұрын
@@Sam-by3kk We learn faster than any other types, but we don't care to master everything. We only master what we want to master. We can basically do any job we want that doesn't require years of learning, but we will never be the best at that job unless we truly have an interest in it. When we truly want to be good at something, we definitely can be absolute masters of it. To me being capable of doing basically anything is one of the most amazing part of being an INTJ, but the best is knowing that when I want to master something, I will master it if I truly want to. That's something most people can't say.
@eden.woodway
@eden.woodway 3 жыл бұрын
True - might I say we’re the ones most likely to focus on studying the teachers’ approaches and methods instead of solely devoting ourselves to a certain subject to reach achievement? It’s always been fairly easy for me to do that. I mean, unless I strongly believe in the utility and future of a subject or field, I’ll never dedicate as much time or energy, I just learn to read others’ intentions, motivation, and point of focus to control their perception of my understanding of the subject.
@intj1782
@intj1782 3 жыл бұрын
@@Terror_Rick Exactly
@iris7484
@iris7484 2 жыл бұрын
yes; learning makes me truly happy, but that doesn't mean I have to learn every single aspect of whatever I'm studying. I think that's where CSJ's quibble is off the mark. I'm generally learning something in pursuit of something else and I like being able to do that and having the capacity for it. But I won't go down a rabbit hole for no reason. I have superficial knowledge about a lot of random shlt.
@oanamaria4
@oanamaria4 4 жыл бұрын
as an INFP, i can say that they're adorable when getting a bit soft or vulnerable. had a very hard time trying to understant INTJs, but they're absolutely fascinating. looking for essence and depth, not superficial things. you have to see behind their "rudeness" to truly understand them.
@HexagonSun990
@HexagonSun990 4 жыл бұрын
WAIT ALL INFP'S I'VE SEEN SO FAR ARE SUBSCRIBED TO CONTRAPOINTS LMAO
@sanjaymohammedthe3rd249
@sanjaymohammedthe3rd249 4 жыл бұрын
I use to get bullied by an INTJ in school. I didn’t even know him but he use to come up to me during lunch and break, and proceed to verbally insult me.
@rocketassistedgoat1079
@rocketassistedgoat1079 2 жыл бұрын
@@sanjaymohammedthe3rd249 I'm sorry to hear that. I'm an INTJ, and I would say that our true nature: is to be kind. Even the internet ranks us as the kindest of the 16 types. I mean, INFPs are known for being the most morally upright of all the 16 types, and from my subjective experience (AND the internet): it's INTJs that they most go for (it's mutual btw). They wouldn't choose us if we didn't have high moral standards, and we wouldn't choose them if they weren't so sweet and wholesome. I mean, objectively our best match is meant to be ENTP (and it probably is-I find them much easier to talk to), yet the 'net isn't full of ENTPs and INTJs gushing over each other, it always seems to be INTJs and INFPs. An immature INTJ though, I could easily see being a bully-for a while. It's that strong Te. The thing is though, whilst objectively I may prefer Te (and ENTPs), subjectively: I've always preferred Fi (and INFPs).
@adambankoff8525
@adambankoff8525 4 жыл бұрын
as an INTJ I can relate to all of this. It takes a lot to step back and realize your own faults, but you will be much happier when you do. I have spent a long time focusing on being present in the moment and constantly checking in with my personal values and it has completely changed how I feel about the world. I use to be so focused on what "worked" and was efficient towards what I wanted to the point that I would sometimes even go against my own personal values. I no longer look down on people that I use to view as lazy or dumb and just realize that they have different priorities then me, and that's ok.
@VelesVoid
@VelesVoid 4 жыл бұрын
I think the section on INTJs being prone to depression from overthinking is referring to existential depression, which ties into Nihilism, Absurdism, etc.
@VelesVoid
@VelesVoid 3 жыл бұрын
@@jellyfishi_ I'm going to need some evidence for that claim in relation to the other types. That's the first time I'm hearing of this.
@shoeberrypie
@shoeberrypie 2 жыл бұрын
@@VelesVoid I can confirm that I am religiously agnostic, thanks to my deep appreciation for the band Meshuggah.
@georgemkay5980
@georgemkay5980 4 жыл бұрын
INTJ Male here. When I saw the private jet I couldn’t stop smiling. This is just who we are. Like the post said, we’ve put ourselves in incorrect relationships and situations because we thought we wanted to be “normal”. Deviation from our goals never satisfies us. We chase success and wealth above all else, and most of all never seek the spotlight because we do not desire attention. Our achievements feed our apetite and ambition so we level up on the playing field.
@patrickgallagher7908
@patrickgallagher7908 2 жыл бұрын
Facts
@billr55
@billr55 4 жыл бұрын
The INTJ' s I know are 1. Always strategizing. 2. On a relentless search for truth...not afraid to discard an error and yet not feel the slightest embarrassment in the adjustment. In other words most types will hold on and save face at their wrong thinking and not let it go or it bruises their ego. Not so with the INTJ. So even though they come off as arrogant they're actually one of the most humble and authentic types. That's my take away. I'm an INFP.
@somedude144
@somedude144 4 жыл бұрын
Only really spent time with one that I think was INTJ. A constantly frustrated and stressed slightly asocial workaholic machine that never malfunctioned, no matter the workload. He was a cool dude. I enjoyed talking with him and seeing how he went about things. Interesting dude, don't know how he could keep it up.
@sj187
@sj187 4 жыл бұрын
INTJs think that they know better than anyone else. Once they decide on something as fact, they will stick to it, even if said fact has been proven otherwise. They may change their mind after they contemplate, in solitude, the new information. However, they tend to present their new found p.o.v., as if they came up with it on their own...
@devinmoran59
@devinmoran59 4 жыл бұрын
They also put the work in to know a subject. They might come off arrogant but it is true that they have researched the topic for weeks or even months before attempting to discuss it. And people they discuss said topic with have not gone to such lengths because its probably not that important of a topic to begin with but this is just how intjs operate. I do agree they discuss a subject as if it was their idea which is a flaw. They should be concise to pick the proper words when explaining to give credit where it's due. Me personally if I am proved wrong I will change my position immediately on the spot. Theres no contemplating in solitude. The contemplation has already happened.
@astoriasxyle5713
@astoriasxyle5713 4 жыл бұрын
@J Sev How exactly?
@destinyc1382
@destinyc1382 4 жыл бұрын
This. This was particularly infuriating with my INTJ because he occasionally tell me how he thought I was so much smarter than him. It was never in a"That was a smart idea" kind of way that would have made it genuine. At first it was in response to seeing that my college GPA was a good bit higher than his. I wouldn't immediately assume that if I were in his shoes solely from that piece of info, but I valued the compliment nonetheless...initially. His constant dismissiveness (and put downs if I'd bring any issue up) made it apparent that he definitely did not think that I was very smart at all. He'd sometimes repeat said compliment after I called him out for dismissing anything I said.
@destinyc1382
@destinyc1382 4 жыл бұрын
J Sev As time progressed, I thought it seemed manipulative more than anything else
@diyab1056
@diyab1056 4 жыл бұрын
See this is what I don't get... Why do people ask "How's your day?" when they're obviously bored and need you to tell them something fascinating? Why do people ask "How's your exams?" if they don't wanna hear it's going great and you plan to graduate cum laude? Why do people ask "How's work?" if they don't want to hear about how you won the case? If it makes them uncomfortable then what do they want :p I know it's gonna make them feel better if I say I failed everything and lost my job, but really that's cringy and even if that ever happens why would I wanna tell people and have them celebrate. Just shows how evil people are :O
@jameslucas129
@jameslucas129 4 жыл бұрын
Or you want to complain and they regret asking. Like, you really don't care so ask a better question or keep it moving please.
@webkelpie
@webkelpie 4 жыл бұрын
They just want connection - they are looking to start and see if they want to continue - for many people that is all small talk is - a toe in the water. Not everyone though. Some really didn’t care and just do it because it’s a convenient convention that helps them get what they want from more of the people they speak to than not. For some they actually care and would happily listen to how you won the case or how bad your exam went. Some people give some of their time. Some would give all of their time. Some people don’ or can’t. I understand it is difficult to tell the differences - but not everyone’s the same. Find a system that works for you but allows you to still have contact with enough new people that you have new experiences available to you so that you have new opportunities and new opportunities to learn. Some people will surprise you if you try - don’t just assume the external evidence is all there is. Chase’s advice appears solid to me, (I am not an intj but I know intjs), and I think that there’s quite a bit to unwrap in his video here that may not be obvious straight away.
@dennisjonker4804
@dennisjonker4804 4 жыл бұрын
@@webkelpie Thanks for your comment. :)
@Acumen928
@Acumen928 4 жыл бұрын
You seriously need to work on your Fe Trickster.
@webkelpie
@webkelpie 4 жыл бұрын
The_Antipioneer, That was jest, right? (But in case it wasn’t, don’t you think it would be better that an individual finds a method, a system perhaps, that gets around the issue until they can find their way to transition.)
@scartdarcy
@scartdarcy 4 жыл бұрын
I think that INTJs can be some of the best humans of all because their struggles are felt so intensely that it gives them the opportunity to make almost anybody recognize themselves in those and feel really seen. I'm not even very compatible with INTJs but I can say that the positive words I heard from them and ISTJs are basically the only ones who have ever made me feel so much happiness that not even my Si demon will be able to forget. I'm not very sensitive to that type of thing and not even Fi heros or parents have even came close to impacting me the way Fi child has. It's just really upsetting to see that sometimes, maybe because of cycles of people misunderstanding INTJs and them doing the same to others, all of that amazing potential gets used to doing the perfect opposite of what builds strong and long lasting bonds with others. They just have that special thing about them that happens to be extra powerful whether they use it to make others love or hate them.
@snackpup
@snackpup 4 жыл бұрын
my intj sister was watching pretty little liars and i said in passing that it was a stupid show and she never talked to me about shows she liked for years lol she took it so personally omg
@aladdout9454
@aladdout9454 4 жыл бұрын
lmao my isfj friend likes riverdale and i criticised that bs so badly and she tried to ignore me but couldn't. Superego simlarities i guess.
@snackpup
@snackpup 4 жыл бұрын
@@aladdout9454 my isfj wife likes Riverdale too lol she's pretty cool though
@snackpup
@snackpup 4 жыл бұрын
@@patriciaeddishaw9244 yeah im like the opposite of that. on the outside ill be like aww a cute kitty. on the inside im cold and calculated always thinking in flashes of images never sentimental
@intj1782
@intj1782 3 жыл бұрын
That's might not because she have taken that seriously. We INTJs don't like wasting our time on meaningless shows. I haven't watched any web series yet in my life (I'm 19 anyways) on my own. It's like If you recommend me, I will give it a try, and moreover I will either finish that show within a day or two, or it will take me forever. Probably she haven't seen any show that might feel like she have really enjoyed. There is no way she can take such a small thing so personally.
@snackpup
@snackpup 3 жыл бұрын
@@intj1782 that's so cute you're 19 don't do anything bad like I did! Lol
@greenbean1ism
@greenbean1ism 4 жыл бұрын
I'm an INTJ- I got into acting and it has really helped me come out of my shell as well as empathize with others. I did a comedy commercial and my extroverted/ESFP? side came out- (I forgot what you call that)- but it was the best feeling in the world and brought me such joy and I highly recommend acting or singing or dance or any of the performing arts for INTJs.
@tehflooper
@tehflooper 4 жыл бұрын
"I'm an INTJ- I got into acting and it has really helped me come out of my shell as well as empathize with others. I did a comedy commercial and my extroverted/ESFP? side came out- (I forgot what you call that)" that doesn't sound like INTJ to be honest.
@fterimage
@fterimage 4 жыл бұрын
I am fascinated by this aspect of INTJs and ENTJs - the hidden affinity for being actors.
@Riiiiiingo
@Riiiiiingo 4 жыл бұрын
@@fterimage well they can assume any emotion and make a show out of it so not surprising.
@XX-ce5tv
@XX-ce5tv 4 жыл бұрын
I had an ESFP friend , i learned a lot from him that which I'm still grateful. I tried returning the favor by showing him the INTJ way. Till this day he still believes me to be a traitor and or a fake.. :/
@fterimage
@fterimage 4 жыл бұрын
@@Riiiiiingo Child or Anima-Animus Fi - Self-Expression? There's the old trope of the "Villainous Monologue" for INTJs where they finally towards the end of the story have the chance to extol their brilliance and express - as someone finally pieces together the layout of how their Ni has isolated them and put them at odds with the world. However it's the ENTJ in particular, and their hidden penchant for *raises Macbeth skull* ACT-ING which I'm curious about too - see as I'm an INFJ I have to act all the time, I feel compelled to, I feel the same way so much of the time as an INTJ but I don't have that resting bitch face INTJs have because I'm aware the roles I have to play, but for me it's a job, not an escape - and it's what the ENTJ or INTJ is hoping to learn from acting I'm curious about.
@christanprice5720
@christanprice5720 4 жыл бұрын
As an INTJ I've been told that I take criticism very well (always trying to improve / humble brag) but at the same time I realize that I do have flaws and so do other people. I agree that for an INTJ it's really easy to become the worst version of your self especially when expanding on narrative in your head that you've created for someone else that isn't necessarily true, but sometimes people are just assholes. I feel like I give people the space to express whatever feelings they need to and that empathy isn't reciprocated, especially when they do something that actually hurts my feelings (which they typically act like I don't have) and it really does become necessary to treat all my relationships like investments as stated in this video.
@mbtisocialclub
@mbtisocialclub 4 жыл бұрын
Anyways C.S Joseph, thank you for helping us INTJs to improve our lives. Please don’t give up on us. We are just trying to live a good life, so please don’t give up on us.
@CSJoseph
@CSJoseph 4 жыл бұрын
I’ll try. I have no choice but to have hope. Even though they have harmed me more than everyone else.
@ashuranero5721
@ashuranero5721 3 жыл бұрын
@@CSJoseph How did INTJs harm you?
@diyab1056
@diyab1056 4 жыл бұрын
My ESFJ constantly criticizes me but in a cute way so I can't get offended. He's very humble but super grounded so he always calls me out.
@lxdm26
@lxdm26 4 жыл бұрын
humble crusaders are truly a gift
@diyab1056
@diyab1056 4 жыл бұрын
@@lxdm26 Yes and yet he says I'm his gift :p
@lxdm26
@lxdm26 4 жыл бұрын
@@diyab1056 enough, stop bragging :)
@diyab1056
@diyab1056 4 жыл бұрын
@@lxdm26 hehe
@rocketassistedgoat1079
@rocketassistedgoat1079 2 жыл бұрын
I love ESFJs!! Sincerely, an INTJ.
@micahzeitlin9278
@micahzeitlin9278 3 жыл бұрын
My two older sisters are twins, and one of them is an INTJ and the other is an ISFJ. They helped each other a lot, but you can imagine my ISFJ sister freaking out when her INTJ twin was acting "weird" or "untraditional" and embarrassing her 😂😂😂
@jmarshal
@jmarshal 4 жыл бұрын
KZbin obviously knew I needed to hear some of this. I’ve completely removed myself from society for many reasons, one being that I somehow became the villain when all I was trying to do was help people by working hard. But people saw that as arrogant and commanding and that I was some evil dictator. It probably doesn’t fit with the INTJ personality but I’m very sympathetic to others, others emotions, I want to comfort people and don’t want anyone sad if I can help it. Guess the way I went about it seemed inauthentic or was taken in the completely wrong way. These days I’m just too scared to do anything. If I don’t associate with anyone and try to have friends, no one (new) can hate me. But that’s...probably feeling sorry for myself and being narcissistic? I don’t even know anymore. At least I can’t hurt anyone else this way?
@jmarshal
@jmarshal 4 жыл бұрын
@dasein 35 this year. I certainly feel too old. I ruined/my life was ruined/disability ruined my life and depression and loneliness is doing the rest. I don’t know if loneliness is an “everyone” thing, but I’ve felt lonely my whole life. I can totally see loneliness being an INTJ thing.
@dexdalador
@dexdalador 4 жыл бұрын
@@dasein9980 wow, that hit home man, I'm 25, and I have been feeling the same loneliness and isolation, that sometimes went to be so painful that it was verging suicidal thoughts... But what I started realising lately is that the control to connect with people, make that first step is in our hands. Sure, won't feel comfortable, due to se inferior.. Sure, we'd rather stay in our ni box than engage with the world... Sure, we can get hurt by opening to people... But ultimately by deciding to open to the world, we have the control in our hands to get out of loneliness.. I've been struggling with that, being afraid that I could get hurt, and misunderstood etc.., so I shut myself off.. But what's the alternative? Either accepting a lonely existence where your only comfort is your false sense of superiority, and at the end of your life you'll look back with regret, OR opening to the world, risking pain, but also allowing good things to come in, being grateful and humble, and just making that first step as a practice..
@sebastiansilverfox6912
@sebastiansilverfox6912 4 жыл бұрын
I know an INTJ with an INTP for an older brother. The INTJ boasted that he could beat the INTP at chess because he could think 10 moves ahead. The INTP decided to humble his younger brother, schooling him in chess. He basically moved his pieces in such a way to make the INTJ have to try and think put ten moves each turn because he could not have predicted the move he made nearly every turn. When the INTJ had sufficiently worn down mentally, only then did the INTP go for the INTJs king. It wasn't even about winning but about proving that his logic could be subverted and not to be so arrogant.
@stevenmartinezgarcia9829
@stevenmartinezgarcia9829 Жыл бұрын
INTJ wouldn't boast anything as they dont seek glorification that way, they would think that but not boast about it. Innately doing it takes your execution and opens the opportunity to what you described here to happen. But you did said it was a younger person discovering the ins and out of their strengths and weaknesses. Those types of teachings are great development for him 👍 Just note now that kid will come back with a thunder as this experience created a goal and revenge lol
@dxfifa
@dxfifa Ай бұрын
@@stevenmartinezgarcia9829 INTJs are incredibly vain and desecrating by default because society puts them in a toxic side of their mind
@betheprotag
@betheprotag 4 жыл бұрын
I feel like you’re describing a less healthy or less mature intj. It could be my upbringing and certain big events, but I don’t really have that problem when interacting with people. I have more problems legitimately caring about people, regardless of if I act like it and if I help them out or listen to their problems and try to cheer them up, whatever it may be. It is social barriers I impose upon myself unconsciously.
@NtandoMbele
@NtandoMbele 3 жыл бұрын
Why are you yelling at me? I watched your whole video. You should be grateful.
@jasonwilkerson9497
@jasonwilkerson9497 3 жыл бұрын
That's a very defensive INTJ statement.
@kohaku1821
@kohaku1821 4 жыл бұрын
My sympathy is not killing everyone.
@mj1472
@mj1472 4 жыл бұрын
I feel this on a spiritual level.
@eyjpxx
@eyjpxx 3 жыл бұрын
😂😂love it!
@Atlstreetpodcast2.0
@Atlstreetpodcast2.0 3 жыл бұрын
😭
@Beyondflix
@Beyondflix 4 жыл бұрын
"Nihilism is no excuse because all of us have something to be grateful for" That one hit deep. Took a long time for me to realize this nugget of truth. That doesn't end the struggle tho. It only gets harder from there.
@amusicians2cents
@amusicians2cents 3 жыл бұрын
I think INTJs' main problem is the dilemma of either choosing to be ourselves and show it to the world homestly but then people who misunderstand us get hurt, or choosing to be nice instead but at least people don't get hurt because of us this way, but either way we INTJs can get seriously misarable.
@meredith18352
@meredith18352 4 жыл бұрын
I had an INTJ assistant at a previous job and she was awesome. She had an excellent work ethic and a great sense of humour, I'm an INFP and we got along really well. The other part of our trio was an ENFJ. I really miss that team.
@Bookooky
@Bookooky 4 жыл бұрын
OMG! I'm an ENFJ and my friend group is INFPs and an INTJ. Guess it's a good trio~ Hopefully you'll find some solace in your future friendships xx
@sanjaymohammedthe3rd249
@sanjaymohammedthe3rd249 4 жыл бұрын
Infp getting along with an intj? No
@rocketassistedgoat1079
@rocketassistedgoat1079 2 жыл бұрын
I'm an INTJ, and I LOVE INFPs and ENTJs. Two of my favourite types.
@rocketassistedgoat1079
@rocketassistedgoat1079 2 жыл бұрын
@@sanjaymohammedthe3rd249 I think you just had a bad experience with one dude, when you and they were young. As an INTJ, my no#1 type: is INFP, always has been. With that said, I don't love them all. I used to hang with a herd of hippie peaceniks, most of whom were probably INFP. I fuc**ng HATE hippies, so they would be the exception for me. But the exception doesn't make the rule.
@martahajdya3635
@martahajdya3635 3 жыл бұрын
As an INTJ I'm immensely grateful to my ESTJ mother who taught me how to appreciate and care for the community we live in and "pierced my balloon" (as she would put it) whenever needed!
@avneet5219
@avneet5219 4 жыл бұрын
As an INTJ, I listened to the whole video in an open minded way and I think you just perfectly described an immature INTJ with no purpose in real Life... I think a fully mature INTJ is just a Total Powerhouse with hell of a Game, an all-arounder to the fullest. Super humble, very charming with an abundance mindset, can't be manipulated so lil tricks from 48 laws of power can't help you bec Ni see right through the bluff... Believe it or not but most INTJs run the world by pulling the strings behind the scenes from the secret societies... For my fellow INTJs, connect with your Purpose man, you have the highest chance of becoming a Millionaire and improving all your flaws bec you tunnel vision all the things you wanna improve as your duty, responsibility and obligation!
@CSJoseph
@CSJoseph 4 жыл бұрын
Are you claiming you are mature?
@salsabeelhamdan2500
@salsabeelhamdan2500 4 жыл бұрын
Thank you for your time and valuable comments, seriously. (from a grateful INTJ :P ) Recently, I have survived and escaped a warzone (where the rest of my family still there and can never ever see them again), and I kind of developed this feeling of hating on people, not seeing any hope, and the world is doomed, and that the only way I can fix it is by burning it or something. I can't do that, so I am sort of stuck with my PTSD for now. This got me now more interested to know about how my Superego ISFJ would manifest. I kind of feel scared of the anger inside me, and I know all of the types would feel something similar to that after the experience of living under war for over 9 years and losing touch with your family for almost ever, however I am really bad in fitting with the new society (or any society I guess!) or finding a community, and even if I found one I do feel ashamed of myself to join them, that I will annoy everyone or "give them a bad experience" due to how sad I seem. Anyway, great video as always. ^_^
@CSJoseph
@CSJoseph 4 жыл бұрын
I am glad you are free
@bobbyjean1581
@bobbyjean1581 4 жыл бұрын
Sorry for what you have been through. It must be tough being away from your family also. I hope you find people to connect with. There are other sad people out there too looking for a friend
@salsabeelhamdan2500
@salsabeelhamdan2500 4 жыл бұрын
@@CSJoseph Thanks!
@salsabeelhamdan2500
@salsabeelhamdan2500 4 жыл бұрын
@Soundeater It is in Gaza, Palestine. Yes, I guess so .. thanks
@salsabeelhamdan2500
@salsabeelhamdan2500 4 жыл бұрын
@@bobbyjean1581 Thanks, I am doing better with time, and yes ..I believe so.
@snackpup
@snackpup 4 жыл бұрын
man, when these videos are about types you've met and really know, it really hits close to home
@ayoungprince6771
@ayoungprince6771 4 жыл бұрын
He’s met and “really knows” all the types what r u saying
@snackpup
@snackpup 4 жыл бұрын
@@ayoungprince6771 when it's about the ones I have known and met
@The_Anais_Watterson
@The_Anais_Watterson 4 жыл бұрын
Finally an intj video for everyone 🌞
@mukherjee.p
@mukherjee.p 4 жыл бұрын
Thanks man. I want people to criticize me so that I can actually improve and not ignore me. Your criticism helps. Thanks again
@xcruxifiedx3477
@xcruxifiedx3477 3 жыл бұрын
why did I almost cry while watching this video? Seriously, i feel i just got extremely humbled by listening to your analysis; I’m so thankful for finding your channel.
@N0URii
@N0URii 3 жыл бұрын
i feel the same
@jacobwiren8142
@jacobwiren8142 4 жыл бұрын
Yeah, the tragic irony of being an INTJ is that I am much more likable when I start treating people like *things* instead of people. I used to follow the Golden Rule, and treat others the way I wanted to be treated. Yeah, that doesn't work for INTJs. People HATE being treated like my equal, and they HATE receiving my respect... but when I treat people like objects and possessions that require upkeep they suddenly like me. I can only treat others from a position of superiority. It's both infuriating and lonely at the same time. Rare is the person like Joseph who can keep up.
@sydneychuke1288
@sydneychuke1288 2 жыл бұрын
Truth
@Encryptus1
@Encryptus1 4 жыл бұрын
Interesting. Just had a conversation last night with my boss about being gratefull for what we have professionally. The company was going to shut down and we where the last effort/chance the administration was willing to concede (had failed twice before with other people). Also I expressed admiration for his sense of morality, which is actually pretty good and inspiring. A few months ago, I talked to my INTJ friend about socializing. I told him I only socialize in the extent that it gives me what I need to build the life I want. However, in order to get something you have to give something back. That was a realization I had a few years ago. Trading a high (job) performance for the resources to build my life. As for the know-it-all part, everyone knows something deeper then you just like there is always someone better then you out there.
@coolbeatguy
@coolbeatguy 4 жыл бұрын
Fantastic video, it describes me in my bitter and nihilistic moods very well. It's hard to appreciate others when all I think about is my own self-worth and achievement. I don't know if this is relatable to other INTJs, but I feel like I just have to achieve one big thing and then people will appreciate me more. Then I can "prove them all wrong", because I ended up more "important" than all the others. That my arrogant "god-complex" behavior was justified in the end, lmao.
@javierlandry7246
@javierlandry7246 4 жыл бұрын
This is fucking relatable!
@justme8841
@justme8841 Жыл бұрын
You are just unhealthy. Healthy intjs are not like this
@sanjaymohammedthe3rd249
@sanjaymohammedthe3rd249 4 жыл бұрын
All the INTJs I have met are so arrogant to the point of seeming antisocial. I notice they like to tear you down when angry at you but then say they were just joking afterwards when they were not...because they can’t get past there pride to apologise..or they just don’t care.
@waltertaboada9319
@waltertaboada9319 4 жыл бұрын
The last part reminds me of PragerU: "How to be more happy? Be more grateful!" Yes, because ungratefulness, entitlement, and a lack of respect for what one is able to have right now, makes it far more easier for even the most afortunate people to become the poorest, in a day..
@st3llarmemer111
@st3llarmemer111 4 жыл бұрын
What type is Dennis Prager anyways
@waltertaboada9319
@waltertaboada9319 4 жыл бұрын
@@st3llarmemer111 my guess: ESTP
@ashuranero5721
@ashuranero5721 3 жыл бұрын
@@waltertaboada9319 How to stop being self entitled?
@sadiahtasnim
@sadiahtasnim 4 жыл бұрын
I just talked to someone yesterday about my Fi getting weaker or "me losing sight of my moral compass" as my Te was developing and I was getting Te focused. You explained this perfectly
@dukeofjax
@dukeofjax 3 жыл бұрын
As an INTJ I almost NEVER speak on my achievements. Like nearly never, even as a child. I’ve always been a Doer and never really talk about it. Soooo please break this down.
@ernestomejia8837
@ernestomejia8837 3 жыл бұрын
We are very insecure, cautious, secretive, and somewhat obsessive. Always in fear of being double crossed. Also, astute as a serpent. Very similar to the scorpion archetype of the Zodiac. What a funny coincidence, and yet again, we do not believe in coincidence. Haha.
@paigelocknane6401
@paigelocknane6401 2 жыл бұрын
Part 1 { "No, not really. INTJs get really caught up in Te processes, especially like with education, institutions, or credentials, or some type of proof of achievement that they think has value when the reality is those two are arbitrary." -C.S Joseph on the point 'INTJs cannot accept things as they are; we need to know 'why.' } C.S Joseph is incorrect on this point. While it is true that INTJs devote a lot of focus to education and Te processes in academia and our career, we are not obsessed with having 'credentials' or having a way to 'prove our achievement' to others. INTJs like validation from others, but do not require it for their self-esteem. It's nice to have credentials, a degree, or proof of our intelligence, but we do not place value on it as C.S Joseph stated. As an INTJ I agree that these things are arbitrary. But many INTJs don't actually care about this kind of official validation of our intelligence. I don't need others to recognize my intelligence, nor do I require a degree or certification or other academic proof on paper to make me 'feel' intelligent. I don't use my educational achievements to deny others the right to question my intelligence. It doesn't matter how licensed or certified I am as an expert; others still have a right to question my intelligence regardless how 'smart' an institution says I am on paper. As an INTJ I have always been interested in the 'why' behind everything. I don't accept things just because someone told me 'that's just the way it is.' I ask for an explanation. 'Why' is that the way it is? The why is always more important to me than blindly accepting what I'm told to believe just 'because someone else said so.' We want there to be a valid reason behind it so we can feel secure knowing it was the right thing to do. You don't know if something is right or wrong if you don't ever question why and discover the truth. {"I kinda disagree with that. INTJs do have a reputation of cutting corners when it suits them." -C.S Joseph on the point: Learning genuinely makes us feel happy.} This is a very vague judgment from C.S Joseph when he disagrees here. It is true that we may at times pick and choose information that supports our argument, but this is in an effort to make our argument more concise and avoid wasting time on irrelevant information. Not everything we learn in school/college is valuable to us later in life, but that can be said for any personality type. What this point is trying to say is that INTJs enjoy learning, and this is true. INTJs do find a special joy in learning. But C.S Joseph has taken the slant that we desire to learn with ulterior motives in mind, which isn't relevant to the actual point, which is: learning genuinely makes INTJs feel happy. And this is true. Learning makes us happy. { We can't be impulsive } I actually agree with C.S Joseph here when he disagrees with this point. I'm an INTJ, and we are definitely capable of being impulsive. We may filter everything through a moral, logical lens, but we are also very aware of what we want and what we know. INTJs are goal-oriented, which means we strive for things very persistently in life. We will go to great lengths to get what we want. We have our own unique personal aesthetic, ambitions, and goals, and when we see something we want, we chase after it. If you find what an INTJ 'wants' you can easily motivate an INTJ, because they'll do almost anything within that moral, logical scope to get it. As an INTJ matures they become less 'up tight' or 'OCD' about things being organized and falling within their comfort zone, and will learn to live and let live, having learned through experience how to enjoy being a bit more social and go with the flow easier. With experience INTJs become more lax on their strict routines and start trying new things on a whim or at the request of friends and family without feeling anxious. It is false to say an INTJ cannot be impulsive. { INTJs are arrogant, but also painfully insecure. } I'm not surprised C.S Joseph agrees with this point in the video, but INTJs are not arrogant. A toxic INTJ without any humility is arrogant, yes, but the majority only 'come across' as arrogant. INTJs are self-motivated, confident in what we know, honest about what we don't know, and make logically rational decisions decisively. We may come across as arrogant or prideful, and may be criticized for 'always needing to be 'right,' but we don't actually 'need to be right.' We're not trying to be 'right.' We're not trying to come across as arrogant. We're not trying to be smarter than someone else or rub our intelligence in their face. INTJs are open to being proven wrong with facts, data, logical reasoning, sources, and evidence, but someone who is emotionally irrational in the moment or chooses to believe in their own subjective definition of what they 'want' to be true doesn't make any sense to us, and we tend to regard these individuals as willfully ignorant and not worth our time if they refuse to even consider our perspective and listen to the objective truth and take a break from their own subjective truth. INTJs are a decisive type who make confident decisions, and this swift drive to act on our own convictions is often perceived as arrogance, when to an INTJ it just seemed like the best path to choose. It just 'made the most sense.' It wasn't a decision made in spite of someone else; it just seemed like the right way to go. Admittedly, this decisive nature can get us into trouble, and this is where INTJs do need constructive criticism from others. We will make confident decisions thinking we made the right choice without a shred of doubt it was the correct decision, only to realize we jumped to conclusions, were totally wrong about something, completely misread a person or situation, or didn't consider another possibility than the one we thought to be the case. This is where having Ni instead of Ne is a problem for us. Ni narrows information down into the most concise, likely possibilities, so INTJs are more likely to believe in 'what is most likely the case' instead of remaining open to the possibilities. INTPs have Ne, which is constantly considering all different angles and possibilities. While this may make it harder for an INTP to identify what they want in any given situation and gives them less certainty of what they know, it allows them to escape the trap INTJs fall into: making educated assumptions. Even though we're 99% certain of something, have a lot of information backing up that conclusion, and are typically right as a result, we will all face a time when we are totally and completely wrong, and are plagued with oversights because we failed to consider the most random or unlikely possibilities.
@arcadianfox8127
@arcadianfox8127 4 жыл бұрын
Talking about achievements "puts people off"? How, why, what the hell?? How about they start putting in the work and actually achieve something. I'm more than happy to discuss their aspirations from time to time and see if I have some advice. Oh wait, no one wants advice. People want to fail. Why is it bad to be self-focused? Other people show time and time again how worthless they can be with their self-pity and whining. Their lack of any ambition and inability to solve their own problems only gets me depressed. They can sit in a corner by themselves while I climb the ladder. That's not a God-complex, letting yourself be dragged down by others is weakness. Here's an immature comment for you: "It's not my fault I'm better than everyone else". Again, no God-complex, simply a realistic outlook on life.
@CSJoseph
@CSJoseph 4 жыл бұрын
It creates envy and jealousy
@AshleyDeaton1230999
@AshleyDeaton1230999 4 жыл бұрын
You may hate this answer but the woman side of Red Pill explains this super well. Nobody (especially men in a romantic setting) cares about what you achieve. It isn't going to benefit them unless you are an expert and doing something in a corporate setting. Even then, people do not admire you more for your achievements. They are like okay whatever and envy will build over time.
@mj1472
@mj1472 4 жыл бұрын
@@AshleyDeaton1230999 I know men are wired to not really give a hoot about a woman's achievements, but you have to understand that none of that changes how INTJs are. I don't desire achievement because of feminism or because of some misguided notion that climbing the corporate ladder or making money will make me happy; I don't care about those things. I genuinely desire to deeply understand and excel at a subject (preferably something that involves analyzing the world), and doing so gives me an almost transcendant fulfillment that no relationship has been able to provide as of yet. I mean, maybe there's an evolutionary reason that INTJ women are rare...
@Bookooky
@Bookooky 4 жыл бұрын
@@AshleyDeaton1230999 Having achievements does gain respect - mostly from male INTJs, interestingly enough. ENFJ here xx
@cadymae3754
@cadymae3754 4 жыл бұрын
I have a real problem with the victim hood mentality. The lack of accountability. And, if asked, I’m not able to hide my viewpoint. I’m logical not emotional. I’m factual not fact less. I don’t like betas. Now a day’s feels like I’m surrounded by them.
@trackee2024
@trackee2024 4 жыл бұрын
You have the best descriptions of types on KZbin! INTJ bitterness hit home for me. It wasn’t until I hit my 30s that was I able to overcome the negative internal thought patterns and arrogance. Oh and the nihilistic “depression”! 😫 So true.
@farissaadeh2997
@farissaadeh2997 4 жыл бұрын
Nihilism without gratitude = "Everything is pointless, one day the sun will consume the earth, we are just monkey spinning on a giant rock, everything is meaningless, we will all die why do anything" Nihilism + gratitude = "Everything is so full and rich of meaning, that wind feels really good on my skin, that rabbit is so cute I'm glad it exists, I can do anything I set my mind too!, how amazing that youtube and search engines exist to make me gather information that comfortable, thank you momma for popping me on earth to witness all of this beauty, I may be a monkey on a rock, but a monkey who loves living on this rock until my time on earth is up, death gives life meaning through humans behavior towards scarce resources (time)"
@farissaadeh2997
@farissaadeh2997 4 жыл бұрын
And btw thank you Chase for that Investment Portfolio thinking to balance out Fi-Child that concept was a real game changer on so many levels
@CSJoseph
@CSJoseph 4 жыл бұрын
You are most welcome sir also well said.
@narchelsin7679
@narchelsin7679 3 жыл бұрын
Sounds like an enormous amount of work and waste of energy. I show gratitude to those who deserve it. Most don't.
@CSJoseph
@CSJoseph 3 жыл бұрын
How do you judge another human’s deservation
@narchelsin7679
@narchelsin7679 3 жыл бұрын
@@CSJoseph by their behavior
@DianaGonzalez-ph1kp
@DianaGonzalez-ph1kp 4 жыл бұрын
As an INTJ, didn't expect the reference on the 'bromance' between Nietzche and Salomé. Greetings.
@felixthecat2786
@felixthecat2786 4 жыл бұрын
Wow. All of these things apply to my dad. I always thought he was an ESFP as he was always just Se raging all over the place all the time. Si demon bitterness, Fi child god complex, lack of gratitude. These are all spot on. I actually thought my dad was a narcissist growing up until I tried to actually understand him. He was certainly taken advantage of and mistreated growing up, but he decided to take it out on all of the wrong people. I realized he was just super insecure and Nihilistic all the time. It was super frustrating to deal with as a child.
@jaredvaughan1665
@jaredvaughan1665 4 жыл бұрын
According to MBTI, INTJs make up 2.1% of the population. 3.3% of the male population but only 0.9% of the female population.
@elonmust8859
@elonmust8859 4 жыл бұрын
@@Wicca_Witchcraft lmao
@t-man5196
@t-man5196 2 жыл бұрын
Why does it “seem” to others like we’re doing it at the expense of others when we focus on improving ourselves and achievement? Also, why would being misunderstood necessarily lead to others not treating us with empathy? Is it perhaps that we’re misunderstood in a particular way or interpreted as being a particular way? If so, what way is this that it would cause others to treat us with a lack of empathy?
@Armosect
@Armosect 3 жыл бұрын
In my experience as an INTJ, I study philosophy and make virtue ethics and deontology my goal. My goal is self improvement and being the best version of myself I can possibly be.
@t-man5196
@t-man5196 2 жыл бұрын
Also, if the reason INTJs have difficulty treating others with empathy is that most people have difficulty treating INTJs with empathy since INTJs are so rare, then wouldn’t we expect to see a similar lack of empathy from the other NJ types, given that they’re all roughly as rare as INTJs?
@kookie3000
@kookie3000 3 жыл бұрын
I would recommend reading: How to win friends and influence people, and The Laws of Human Nature.
@mattersofperception9741
@mattersofperception9741 4 жыл бұрын
How you choose to be perceived by others is ultimately up to you as an individual. INTJ's have great potential to change how they are viewed by themselves and others. It takes determining who you want to be in the future and focusing your area of mastery onto yourself. You might be the smartest person in the room, but if you do not have the ability to influence and work with others, you might as well not be there. Being an INTJ does not make others dislike you; how you choose to interact and influence others might. Learning about emotional intelligence, leadership and meditation can help. Seek feedback from others to understand yourself and find out how you are perceived by them. Find others to mentor and be humble. Aim to make others more skilled than you are. Offer advice, but realise a good question is often better. Make sure those close to you are positive; you develop based on the five people closest to you. Other people are concerned about their own lives and are not spending every waking moment thinking about how they can affect you. Don't project your thought patterns onto others; you already know most of the world does not think like you. This is not to become like other people, just a better version of yourself. Everyone has the responsibility to improve themselves rather than expecting others to change to meet their desires.
@bananabomb3846
@bananabomb3846 3 жыл бұрын
Thank you for this. I’m trying to grow as an individual and all of the stereotypes and the glorification of intjs on the internet does not help.
@milz7129
@milz7129 4 жыл бұрын
I match the functions of intj. But I hate a lot of the stereotypes.
@eden.woodway
@eden.woodway 3 жыл бұрын
Yeah, INTJ myself, and assuming you’re talking about the general “emotionless masterminds” or the “anti-people anti-hero,” I find them lacking depth of character despite the frequent generous use of words such as “deep” or “insightful” to describe them. The overall picture for these stereotypes appears (to me) immature, ignorant and other times just plain depressing or pathetic. I never found sources where INTs’ flaws are studied and understood more in-depth (or blatantly called out), so the analysis so far from CSJ about INTJ and their bullsh*t is refreshing. It makes it so much easier to embrace my flaws and map points of improvement-it’s liberating.
@malcolmmacinnis247
@malcolmmacinnis247 4 жыл бұрын
Dude Ti child God complex is kind of more annoying because it is hard to see sometimes from the outset because they have slightly more social awareness so its difficult to see, especially to their friends. Good video!
@noraflood6482
@noraflood6482 4 жыл бұрын
yea same i honestly find Ti god complex much more annoying. Fi child-god is kinda cute (until you actually fall for it though and believe them and get hurt)
@malcolmmacinnis247
@malcolmmacinnis247 2 жыл бұрын
@@noraflood6482 agreed
@DemonixGamer
@DemonixGamer 3 жыл бұрын
You literally hit the nail on the head. I often think I'm being generous, when I'm actually being controlling. And I am bitter because of my past. 🤷🏽‍♂️
@valtersvilnis1113
@valtersvilnis1113 4 жыл бұрын
As an INTJ myself I can tell this is so true.
@amoore2165
@amoore2165 4 жыл бұрын
I’m an INTJ man and was hoping to find, and actually did find, an INTJ woman. She’s fantastic. She’s so easy to deal with, so communicative, so reliable, so supportive, disciplined, smart, accomplished, stable, good looking, works out every day. No drama, no games, straightforward, cares about truth over anything else which makes her very real. Her natural response to pretty much anything is, yes. I don’t know what to say besides an INTJ is an exceptional person and seeing her from the outside gives me more appreciation for myself because of course I have much of her same qualities and values. An INTJ with another INTJ is bliss.
@CSJoseph
@CSJoseph 4 жыл бұрын
She’s an ENTP
@amoore2165
@amoore2165 4 жыл бұрын
She’s taken the test. Multiple times. She’s been INTJ her whole life. Same for me. I took it a couple years ago which was INTJ and later found an old college test result (given by counselors) from 20 years prior that said INTJ. I didn’t pay attention to the letters at the time so didn’t even recall that.
@amoore2165
@amoore2165 4 жыл бұрын
Probably my favorite quality is that she’s even keeled. So easy to talk to because she’s always logical and rational and not very judgmental. She’s always in a good mood. Always wants to be helpful.
@amoore2165
@amoore2165 4 жыл бұрын
And she’s very introverted. No way in hell she’s an E.
@needyourname438
@needyourname438 4 жыл бұрын
One of my best friends is an INTJ and yup... people don't like her and think of her as disrespectful. But she is super open minded and is always looking for knowledge, I respect her so much because she can make things happen.... I can't xD INFP.
@noraflood6482
@noraflood6482 4 жыл бұрын
wait till she back-stabs you when 'making something happen' for herself lol. u might even fall for her self-narrative and excuses, or forgive her anyway since ur an infp....
@needyourname438
@needyourname438 4 жыл бұрын
@@noraflood6482 I might be confused then, perhaps she is not an INTJ because she never excuses herself, before, after or during anything. Thanks for the info... even thou I'd never get in her way when she is trying to get something... that would be a 'dick' move from me. I have no goals now, I just feel alone sometimes and want some company, why would I get in the way of someone who is actually working to go somewhere?
@noraflood6482
@noraflood6482 4 жыл бұрын
@@needyourname438 ah sorry that was just a little harsh of me. But I know INTJs to be "schemers" (not necessarily in a bad way - they just plan and machinate towards their own ends according to their Fi). But if you happen to be in the way they seem quite ok with just disadvantaging or hurting you in order to achieve their own desires (usually secretly, behind the scenes). They don't "push people aside" quite as obviously as ENTJs though, but imo just as ruthlessly....the INTJs I know have all (every single one of them) done something like this before in order to get ahead...that's actually partially what endears them so much to me. Because they are a mix of ruthlessness and goodness. You always wish the Fi will triumph in the end...but they always seem to lapse at least once or twice at critical moments when it counts....so can really hurt you, whether as friend or lover..The ones I know who've done this are also often full of regret (But you're right - they don't go around making "excuses" to others. They don't feel that they have to. I'm very sure they are "excusing" themselves in their own heads though - you can see how their internal processes of self-justification play out elsewhere in their words and actions) Very "high-minded" some of them - perhaps that's the "god-complex" referred to here. Again another reason why this INFP falls for them lol. All the wrong reasons. On the whole they are super loyal and if they like you they really do and will do so much for you!
@needyourname438
@needyourname438 4 жыл бұрын
@@noraflood6482 I'll take all of your words :') thanks. However, I see we have had different experiences with the XNTJs. My first boss was an ENTJ. The only man who gave me and opportunity when no one would. One day a co-worker told me the ENTJ made a comment about me: "I like her, she works hard" (Aparently he had seen me working while everyone was at lunch, but I did that just because I was scared to talk to the team) After that day I started working SUPER HARD so I would not ruin the image he had of me. The ENTJ trusted me with a lot of work and I gave my best. I screwed up BIG TIME ONCE. He never said anything... he just stopped delegating me things and my heart broked. When I left the job he wished me the best of lucks and told open up my own bussiness. He was intimidating, but I admired him so much. (-sigh- I really want this Covid situation to be over. Has it ruined things for you too?)
@noraflood6482
@noraflood6482 4 жыл бұрын
@@needyourname438 also - don't take their crap to heart! they pounce on us like this sometimes (i'm sorry but ENTJs talk so much crap). accept the compliment and move on! dont get trapped by ur own Fi! sorry im talking so much! im worried abt INFPs elsewhere being run down by the NTJs lol. good to have them on your side - but remember they will always feel better being 'above' you (and we like them to feel good abt themselves and remain in our 'place'...) that's so stupid though - we really dont have to! (could pretend though - Ne's good at that). Sending you my abstract thoughts and strength!
@kimberlydonaldson4904
@kimberlydonaldson4904 4 жыл бұрын
Thank you for adding the solution to not being a doormat. It confirms where I am on my journey. Much love!
@dukeofjax
@dukeofjax 3 жыл бұрын
The more I listen the more inaccuracies I see with regard to me, I’m generous and grateful, and I’ve taken the test several times....and always the same results, with one exception and that was over ten years ago when i got ENTJ. So giving to those in need, recognizing the service industry people in malls and other piling places to paying for the struggling person in front of me grocery’s at the grocery store. And this has been apart of me since I can remember. Once again I’ve taken this test personally and as a requirement for work that was given by a professional and the results have consistently been the same. INTJ and not being “narcissistic” but the negatives especially about how we entreat people with the lack of kindness just doesn’t fit me AT ALL.
@JasminHLo
@JasminHLo 3 жыл бұрын
I agree with you. The harsh stereotypes (e.g. arrogance, ingratitude, unsympathetic) does not align with my behavioral patterns or core values. As YOU grow older in maturity, the investment portfolio analogy will be start to manifest, if you (as an INTJ) acknowledge and apply yourself consistently.
@StevenWiley-vy7sj
@StevenWiley-vy7sj 10 ай бұрын
An INTJ instills resentment by subjecting others to the same high standards he holds for himself.
@stevedavenport1202
@stevedavenport1202 4 жыл бұрын
Why??? A is for arrogance. INTJs are so interesting to talk to until the arrogance comes bubbling to the surface.
@stevedavenport1202
@stevedavenport1202 4 жыл бұрын
@Humility First No type has a monopoly on arrogance. However, over 90% of the INTJs I have ever met are arrogant. This is an amazingly high rate and I don't not observe such a high rate of arrogance in other MBTI types.
@noraflood6482
@noraflood6482 4 жыл бұрын
I find their arrogant god-complex really cute tbh - because it always seems so undeveloped to me (like a boy trying to be a big man). they expose themselves a lot, and i agree Fi-child is easy to play with. i love intjs to bits. the only thing is that in their quest to get what they want, they can sometimes get quite selfish and trample on others, forget their Fi-morals. That's when the god-complex is not so cute anymore because it's just not good enough. Especially compared to yours lol - when you're an INFP (lead-Fi) anyway...
@menthol1234
@menthol1234 4 жыл бұрын
@@stevedavenport1202 Can you define arrogance?
@stevedavenport1202
@stevedavenport1202 4 жыл бұрын
@@menthol1234 I define it the way it is popularly understood.
@sanjaymohammedthe3rd249
@sanjaymohammedthe3rd249 4 жыл бұрын
Humility First it is definitely particular with this type.
@Anotherguy1st
@Anotherguy1st Жыл бұрын
Waaayyy late to this party myself but I definitely feel like you are right about the gratitude thing, at least from my perspective. I could definitely spend more time showing them I do care, and not just through words, though I do try to let people know that as well. I have had some friends in the past not really appreciate it, but I can't let that stop me from showing those who deserve it they are appreciated. Thanks for making great content and putting it out into the world!
@utena8518
@utena8518 4 жыл бұрын
I disagree that the most brilliant INTJ was Frank Abegnail, there are much greater people whom were INTJs, starting from Isaac Newton to Marie Curie to Nietzsche, Nikola Tesla,, etc, Frank Abegnail certainly does not represent the peak of an INTJ.
@CSJoseph
@CSJoseph 4 жыл бұрын
Tesla is an NTP
@fifaguy2498
@fifaguy2498 3 жыл бұрын
@@CSJoseph No
@paigelocknane6401
@paigelocknane6401 2 жыл бұрын
Part 2 It is true that INTJs are insecure, often as a result of not feeling 'in control' of our own minds. We strive to know what is correct/true/right so we don't look like utter fools and second guess ourselves all the time. We desire education so we can feel confident in our intelligence and decision-making without having to constantly worry if we're wrong or being deceived. We fear being controlled ourselves, so we learn as much as we can to prevent the rug from being pulled out from under us. Our intelligence is not a source of pride for an INTJ. It is a lifeline; a necessary aspect of our lives that makes us feel competent as a human being. We strive to be intelligent, but not because we want to 'look' or 'appear' intelligent to others (we aren't seeking validation). We strive to be intelligent because intelligence is necessary for an INTJ to feel confident in their own decisions and beliefs. If we doubted every decision we made, we wouldn't get anywhere in life, so we'd rather take an educated guess or make a decision based on what we know, and learn our lesson if we turn out to be wrong. INTJs learn by making these mistakes, and those who fail to learn from their mistakes do turn out arrogant. But that comes down to every individual INTJ, since everyone is different. C.S Joseph believes it is a good idea to humble an INTJ by setting them up for failure instead of stroking their ego with compliments on their achievements, but even when dealing with an arrogant INTJ, this is not a good way to handle the problem. An INTJ will not learn their lesson by being set up to fail on purpose, and will only resent the person who intentionally tried to hurt them this way by purposely sabotaging them. It is not right to treat anyone this way no matter how arrogant they are. What does it say about your character when you taught someone a lesson but chose to be intentionally malicious instead of handling the problem with civility? C.S Joseph enjoys stealing time from INTJs against their will and believes this is funny, making INTJs feel obligated to give him their time as a way to 'get back at them' when he believes an INTJ is becoming too selfish or entitled to his attention. Does anyone else have a problem with this kind of petty immaturity? 'An INTJ feels entitled to my attention, so I'm going to take revenge by doing the same thing to them.' Sure. Real mature, C.S Joseph. Real mature. Because that will totally solve the problem... When you could actually solve the problem by talking to the INTJ about it with tact instead of sticking it to them like a vengeful brat. An INTJ doesn't know how to 'take a hint.' If you have a problem with us, talk it out instead of passive aggressively prolonging the tension between yourself and the INTJ. And if they still act arrogant to you, that's their choice, but you were as gracious to them as you could be in a conversation with them, so it doesn't come back to bite you because you did the right thing by not antagonizing the other person further. { We know that emotional vulnerability is a weakness that others will exploit to no end if given the chance, so we don't give them that chance. } C.S Joseph takes this as an opportunity to call all INTJs arrogant with a god complex for believing this about ourselves, but this is not what most INTJs actually believe. The INTJ who wrote this might believe emotional vulnerability is a weakness for others to exploit and therefore strives not to give others the chance to take advantage of it. C.S Joseph is not wrong to condemn this attitude of this particular INTJ, but he fails to recognize that this statement from this one INTJ is not an accurate representation of what most INTJs actually believe. As an INTJ in my younger years, I used to be much more guarded and antisocial towards others in general, and did feel threatened by others who might use my true emotional insecurities against me. But this was how I felt in 'middle school.' I was a young, immature INTJ who, at the time, did not understand that emotional vulnerability is actually very important when building trust and relationships with others. A wise INTJ learns that opening up to people doesn't make you weak. It's opening up to the wrong people that puts you at risk. With time and experience you learn who to look out for, and who to place your trust in. An INTJ may have very few friends, but we trust them unconditionally because they've proven time and time again that they can be trusted. Overall, this INTJ seems more young and immature than a lot of their INTJ peers, so naturally a lot of these points from this INTJ are going to be under harsher scrutiny from C.S Joseph in this video, and makes his conclusions about INTJs in this video depict INTJs as being more overall arrogant and self-centered. It is important to realize, however, that these points do not represent all INTJs, nor are the majority of INTJs narcissistic and self-absorbed. Many INTJs have learned to show gratitude to people, especially family, friends, co-workers, and other people who have helped them get to where they are in life. C.S Joseph repeatedly insists INTJs care a lot about reputation, performing well to appeal to others, and credentials, but the reality is INTJs only obtain these credentials and reputation as a means to an end. We don't need them to feel validated by others. You get a diploma when you graduate. You get a driver's license when you pass a driving test. You obtain official recognition when you earn such things, but for an INTJ we don't need them to 'feel good' about ourselves. INTJs are often misunderstood due to how rare our type is and the fact it's harder to show sympathy for others when we always feel the need to have a valid reason to feel sympathy for someone first. It's like we have to analyze them first before deciding if their reasons are even worth feeling sorry for. I won't try to defend that. INTJs are not the best type when it comes to showing sympathy to others. An INTJ has to learn to be more conscious of how what we say and do might affect others emotionally and learn to be more courteous to others on that note. But it is also true that not many people show us that kind of empathy in return. Sometimes the greatest way to show an INTJ that you care is to follow their advice for your own good. One of the hardest things for an INTJ is when people come to us and complain about their problems, only to become offended when we offer solutions to their problems instead of merely sympathizing with the how they 'feel' about the problem. They totally brush the INTJ off when we offer constructive criticism, solutions, or advice because the person just wanted the INTJ to feel sorry for them instead of being asked to go and deal with the problem once and for all. And for problems where there is no easy solution, an INTJ may feel distressed when they can't come up with a practical way to help the person solve their problem. This is why INTJs struggle to just be there for a person. We don't know what to do when we see someone crying, throwing a fit, needing a shoulder to cry on, needing someone to vent to, etc. If nothing we say or do will help the person's plight, it's difficult for us to recognize all we really need to do is just 'be there' for someone. Even when it makes no sense to us whatsoever, it's something every INTJ needs to learn. And what's hypocritical is that INTJs themselves also crave this kind of empathetic response even though we don't show sympathy the same way to others that we want for ourselves.
@CSJoseph
@CSJoseph 2 жыл бұрын
Sounds like a lot of assumptions
@paigelocknane6401
@paigelocknane6401 2 жыл бұрын
@@CSJoseph Yes, and summing up everything I said as assumptions sounds like a convenient way for you to overlook/undermine everything I said. I speak as an INTJ from personal experience, and much of what I've experienced as an INTJ directly contradicts many of the points you made about INTJs in this video. I'm an INTJ. My sister is an INTJ. Ben Shapiro is an INTJ. Al Coon from the KZbin Channel 'INTJ Island' is an INTJ. Frank James and Love Who channels depict the INTJ with points more accurate than in this video. Many personality type websites such as 16 Personalities, Truity, and Jung Typology overlap many of their points about the INTJ with relative accuracy. Need I mention also the INTJs who disagree with you in the comment section of this video? Are they all 'just making assumptions' about their own personal experience as INTJs? I don't agree with all the points Deja Spriggs lists as characteristics of the INTJ, but there are several I do agree with. I think some of Deja's points are a sign of an immature INTJ, while others are more universal for all INTJs. What isn't an assumption is how you recommend people treat an INTJ you perceive as arrogant. An INTJ might be arrogant or simply be coming across arrogant. Either way, is it really right for you to make the assumption that INTJ needs to be put in their place, taught a lesson, or humbled? Confronting the INTJ in private and talking to them about your problem with them is more than reasonable, but intentionally setting them up to fail to 'humble' them does not humble an INTJ. The INTJ who realizes you purposefully sabotaged them will not feel humbled. They'll feel betrayed and resent you for it. They will dig their heels in defensively and not understand why you chose to set them up for failure or embarrass them in front of others. Just because an INTJ was arrogant towards you doesn't mean it's right to treat them the same way in return, even if you think they deserve it. An eye for an eye and the world goes blind. An arrogant INTJ may not deserve such patience, but what does it say about you if all you do is act arrogant towards them in return? Especially when it doesn't actually change the INTJ's attitude or behavior? You won't be humbling an INTJ by betraying them and setting them up for failure on purpose. All you'll get is an INTJ who hates you. You aren't justified in their eyes just because you were trying to 'humble' them. If they're already an arrogant INTJ you just gave them a reason to be even more arrogant by pointing out what a jerk you were towards them. Instead of giving the INTJ fuel for the fire you should cover yourself by being polite and talking to them instead of publicly shaming them. This way, even if you were polite and talked to them, and they still remain arrogant, that's completely on the INTJ, not you, since you were just voicing your concerns about their behavior and did so in private without doing anything to embarrass or betray the INTJ in question. The same problem persists with 'punishing' an INTJ you believe is feeling too entitled to your attention. By stealing time from an INTJ and making them feel obligated to giving you their time as a form of retaliation against the INTJ, you are only prolonging the problem in a passive aggressive manner instead of confronting the problem directly. INTJs value honesty and respond better to constructive criticism than being expected to 'take a hint' and somehow figure out the underlying reason behind someone's sudden passive aggression towards them. We don't know why you're 'punishing' us if you don't use your words and tell us what's wrong. You may think we should be able to figure it out and not have to spell it out for us, but we are pathetically dense. If you don't explain it to us, we might not even realize we're demanding too much of your attention. And in that case you just punished an INTJ who doesn't even realize they're hurting you by asking for too much of your attention. Most INTJs would be content to back off and leave you be for a while if you tell them you need a break from them and their desire for your attention. And the fact that INTJ wants your attention in of itself is often a sign that INTJ likes you and enjoys spending time with you, so it's never a good idea to punish an INTJ for wanting to spend time with you. If they're being too demanding or clingy just tell them.
@MarkOBrienTeaches
@MarkOBrienTeaches 4 жыл бұрын
I think a lot of these things you mentioned the 2nd half of this, are things that we can train out of ourselves; or at least, I have worked hard for 15 years or so to train these traits out of myself. We just have to be very, very aware of what makes ourselves tick, and pay attention to that. (edit - at least with the gratitude...sympathy is just something that's pretty hard. I trade sympathy for waiting to find out how I can assist I think)
@Sapharone
@Sapharone 4 жыл бұрын
You forget one very important thing. The investment can't be just once, or once a year. It has to be regular and it has to be genuine. And that's the real hard part and the reason why many INTJ's fail. They might go ahead and show gratitude to the people they care for, but then tire of it, retreat or forget about it and drop back into the old state. I know, because that's what usually happens to me. Which reminds me, I should call my mum.
@Fin_flash
@Fin_flash 4 жыл бұрын
I liked the investing comparison a lot. Thanks for that :)
@roguetherapist2595
@roguetherapist2595 4 жыл бұрын
I love the slow uptake into passionate response to INTJs from the ENTP c.s.joseph its beautiful
@Julia-ey4zd
@Julia-ey4zd 4 жыл бұрын
Isfps are similar. They are also so in love with themselves and they talk about their achievements and how good they are, about good things that they did, but they do good things also to make other people think they're good.
@elmiyk
@elmiyk 4 жыл бұрын
Hmm, i know like 3 ISFP’s and only one of them is somewhat like that, so i wouldn’t really agree with your statement.
@GlobalResonanceDance
@GlobalResonanceDance 2 жыл бұрын
One of the classic lines i heard recently is an apparent apology that went "Sorry I told you off. You don't have as fast processing as I do and I judged you against myself. " Uhhh... thanks? Sometimes I wish I could slap them out of the superiority complex. Often times been berated for being wrong and ridiculous only to be proven right in the end, and I have to point this out myself. I have never heard "hmm maybe I'm wrong, let me think about that". Intj is automatically right in every way. Funny tho just saw 2 intjs interact and one (doctor) lectured, dismissed the other as paranoid and ridiculous and the second was so offended he vowed to neve see him again. Ironically blind to the hypocrisy.
@edennis8578
@edennis8578 2 жыл бұрын
We have a superiority complex because we usually are superior, intellectually. We almost never state an opinion unless we have very good reason to believe we're right; we research everything into the ground. I'm right 99% of the time, so if I say you're wrong, you're probably wrong. I've had people insist that I was wrong, then 20 years later, "everybody" knows what I knew the entire time.
@sarenastralis9969
@sarenastralis9969 4 жыл бұрын
as an enfj i dont dislike them i love them i just think they need to actually feel things and not blow up and relaliate on innocent people. its happened to people around me like 10 times with 10 different intjs
@dallyh.2960
@dallyh.2960 4 жыл бұрын
Having a positive outlook on life and gaining gratitude have been very hard-fought achievements in my life. I don't remember exactly how I got them, but I appreciate them to the fullest extent of my being.
@virginia4032
@virginia4032 4 жыл бұрын
How dare you call INTJs out, Chase. Attacking our flaws to help us grow and be better people. I can’t believe you. If I was secure, I’d take that advice and utilize it to the fullest.
@VE11
@VE11 3 жыл бұрын
"Treat everyone like an investment portfolio...👌🏾" Excellent
@Alberto-ku2yu
@Alberto-ku2yu 4 жыл бұрын
I loved the video, i do find you can fix all these problems by knowing yourself and being aware that ethics are really important even if you dont fully understand them. My INFJ girl keep my feets in the ground, she is harsh and kinda tsundere, but she is the only person that has seen me whit mi armor fully off, i trust her to death and i belive thats also why she is happy whit me.
@jokster2576
@jokster2576 4 жыл бұрын
tbh I have been meaning to volunteer time at a homeless shelter to better get in touch with my Fi and or raise my neuroticism and to treat relationships as investments is a perfect analogy for us INTJ's to follow
@narchelsin7679
@narchelsin7679 3 жыл бұрын
What exactly does an INTJ owe gratitude to all these falsely judgmental individuals for? For their mere existence? Talk about narcissism.
@josephmartinlowsky4178
@josephmartinlowsky4178 3 жыл бұрын
"INTJs are arrogant due to child god complex." I actually thought I was stupid as a child. I didn't grow into my brain, as it were, until I was in my mid-twenties. Even still, one of my greatest errors is to default to the assumption that any person I'm dealing with is about as intelligent as I am. I have to actively decide to remind myself that the person in question may not be intelligent at all. When I do remember that one fact, interpersonal interactions become immensely easier.
@fjbz3737
@fjbz3737 4 жыл бұрын
I know you said that incels are most often INFPs or something to that effect in your INFP cognitive transition lecture, but I think that is actually describing the “nice guy” stereotype which is something different. The truth is that on the internet, most incels are INTJs (though usually they would deny that label and obsess over physical self-improvement)
@CSJoseph
@CSJoseph 4 жыл бұрын
Yes and Crusaders and NPs struggle with that the most
@LaMach420
@LaMach420 10 ай бұрын
Honestly true. My friend and I are both good looking and have a easier time initially attracting women. He is an INFP and dries them up by being overbearingly nice, I may manage to have them stick around longer due to dark triad appeal but am ultimately too intense, demanding or uninterested.
@Coneman3
@Coneman3 3 жыл бұрын
I loved when you said “fake an illness, yes, as well as fake an identity” 😂 You’re a funny guy! 😄
@fikretdemir4818
@fikretdemir4818 4 жыл бұрын
I (INTP) dislike some INTJs because; - They prefer to listen television, newspaper, midwit "experts", or religious authority; even if they know you are much better informed than them, you have to have PhD on every discussion, you have to write books or you have to be some kind of messiah or angel. They expect me to debate with these "experts" and dominate them. (Yeah, you just collect every junk in your brain and I will clean these junks for you. And my time is not important, I just keep debating with them while you put another junk in your brain) Otherwise they can even critise you because you read to much for them. They even claim sarcastically I can only be right if "experts" are morons or conspirers. (Even if you prove them their "experts" are liars or morons, they will just move to goalpoast perpetually) - You have to prove your negative claim (i.e. "There is no cockroach on Mars surface") to them, but they don't even try to prove their positive claims [i.e. "Many Albians works for secret cabal to raise the Anti-Zod, they have influence on every authority, (but let's obey to this Albian controlled authority)"]. - They imitate weird things even if they disgust from source of action. - They do "good" things even you warned them don't do this "good" things. - You have to explain agreements many times, otherwise they will imagine if you promised somethings. Agreement is a positive thing, if I didn't say "I will do this", then don't expect it from me. If it's hard to remember agreement then write it down somewhere with capital letters/colored pens etc. what I do and what you do. - Some of them has god complex but I am better god than you (expect "experts", they are greatest gods). - Don't expect humbleness from others, while you are doing nothing or even worse filling your brain with junk. - Repetition doesn't make anything true, it makes you fail many times or makes you a parrot/sheep. - If you don't critisize harshly, they will probably join to weird cults.
@CSJoseph
@CSJoseph 4 жыл бұрын
Daaaaaannnggg
@dallyh.2960
@dallyh.2960 4 жыл бұрын
A lot of this applies to Istjs as well. There does exist both Intjs and Istjs who have a more developed Te and trust in their Ti, and can understand reasons not to listen to authority. It just takes constant and verifiable criticism of the authority to get them to understand. I used to be a "trust the scientists, they know what they're doing" kind of guy until somebody brought to light to me just how corrupt the science industry is, and how easily statistics and studies can be manipulated. Now, I do my own research, or I do not except some 'scientific' claim made at all. And I have people like you to thank for it, so thank you.
@drea4195
@drea4195 3 жыл бұрын
"INTJs are always telling everyone else about their achievements" Not I. (INTJ) Maybe it's just that I don't know many other INTJs, but this general description of narcissism and vanity isn't ringing true to me. Myself, and the few other INTJs I've known, tend to be reserved about our achievements. We don't want to draw unneeded attention to ourselves, not even positive attention. The less others know about us, the better.
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