Dealing with Delusional People

[@DarrenFMagee]

The videos I make are requested by you the viewers. If there are any topics you would like me to cover in future videos please comment and let me know.

[@sensitiveself]

Please do some videos on anxious and avoidant attachment in relationships. Am enjoying your vids! thanks.

[@DarrenFMagee]

Thank you for your suggestion and kind feedback

[@jmo4521]

Hi. Have you discussed how to thrive as a single person after divorcing a narcissist? What are the challenges and benefits of living life as a single survivor who does not want a new partner/spouse/love? Are there stages to healing and thriving into late adulthood as a person who escaped decades of abuse?

[@DarrenFMagee]

I have a playlist on recovery and one on trauma bonding I’d you find anything there helpful. I’ll be adding to it in the future

[@H.Hardrada]

I have had trouble finding scientific literature on group-associate / collective narcissism. Most of what you get is a short work by Freud. It would be nice to find some more recent work on the subject (if you know of any, please let me know). It seems psychologists get really wrapped up with the way a narcissist associates with romantic partners on an individual level, but that is just a small sliver of their interactions in the world, though it is one that is easier to observe. A video on the subject of what types of groups narcissists tend to be apart of, how do they behave in these groups, what types of groups tend to take on a narcissistic character themselves, common behaviors of narcissistic groups etc. This would be immensely helpful. Not only as a video, but as a research topic.

[@honoryourself2098]

I have a loved one who suffers from delusions. The Dr told me I would be ‘wasting my breath’ to reason or try to talk sense into the loved one. Even on antipsychotic medication delusions are very much fixed. Very draining to constantly reassure a person with such embedded beliefs.

[@denisemaguire5482]

I have a loved one that is suffering terribly from a fixed delusion that a government faction is trying to kill him, he is convinced they have stations set up by his house and are also listening to everything and are waiting to make their move to kill him, he has been diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder and is taking antipsychotic medication but it is not working and he refuses for us to take him to hospital (mental health hospital) to at least talk to some doctors. It is extremely difficult to know how to deal with him because we impulsively tell him what he is experiencing isn't real. This is a nightmare for myself and our family.

[@CylenX6]

@@learningenglishthroughtran8540 Sorry to hear. You should seek help. Hope things work out!

[@aperta7525]

@@denisemaguire5482 Well... In his favor, the government isn't trustworthy. But believing he has been specially singled out must be really hard.

[@aperta7525]

@@learningenglishthroughtran8540 No one who thinks they are holy is holy. Sanctity is too intimately tied to humility. Every good thing is from God, whatever I do that is evil is from me. Purity of intention also factors into that. Feeling good about/when doing good works is one thing, but doing good works for self esteem or for human respect deprives the good works of real merit. Unfortunately, many New Age/pagan spiritual practices are done by professed Christians, and demons are the top masters of deception. We humans are blind even when we think we see, and even when we do see we are apt to inaccurately interpret communication and actions. Only God perceives everything. But if those gifts are put to the test with a false witness, the one who employs the false witness to test the misled believer is the one nonetheless doing the works of demons. If the "believer" is secretly in league with the demons, it is likely that the false witness will nonetheless be seen through, and then the demons can potentially use the "believer" to lure the witness further in, for the demons to have a greater access and do greater prolonged harm. It can go both ways. Unbelief is not a good guard against deception. Wisdom and caution are healthier than cynicism.

[@mzliberty7647]

Targeted Individuals... [gov conspiracy mob]... very draining...

[@sonyacaztillo7649]

My husband is delusional. I get accused of cheating daily now it’s gotten as bad as him sending pictures of women and saying it’s me with another family which doesn’t even resemble me. These women have tattoos I have none. That was my warning ⚠️ that something was wrong. He admittedly believes it’s me. It’s daring exhausting and frustrating.

[@newssquabbler69]

The most dangerous is when they know you are leaving but if you don't escape it will only get worse...

[@judeflynn9223]

run

[@sharit7970]

I hope things are better now, but I suspect not...would he be willing to go to counseling with you, maybe you could get him to go with the idea that you want to your marriage to work, and that a counselor could help get to the bottom of his feelings of why he feels you're cheating.

[@tori8380]

That’s horrid. So sorry.

[@LoveahmakeyaCrazay]

I know this old,, but I’m went through the same thing..

[@johnrauner2515]

I have a delusional lunatic neighbor who is convinced there is some kind of feud between us. Won't bother going into the details. But I learned a long time ago delusional people can't be helped. Just walk away and leave them to it. They are not listening anyway so the only time being wasted is your own if you stick around and try to help. They are beyond help. That is not a selfish attitude, it is a pragmatic and realistic one.

[@johnrauner2515]

I enjoy Darren's videos but his advice here is way off the mark. My experience of trying to placate and pacify delusional people is, it only encourages them. It's like pouring fuel on the flames. They see your attempts to explain as justification that they are right. That's how twisted their logic is. You are in effect colluding with them in trying to explain (yourself or their view of things). You are in effect engaging with their delusions by trying to explain them. And that engagement is what they see as proof they are correct. You only make the situation worse by doing this. There is only one realistic option with delusional people. Bin them and move on.

[@taraarrington2285]

Agreed. You can't help them.

[@Minisynapse]

I know people who will walk away from reasonable people while pretending the other one is crazy like in your speech. Imagine if A is the crazy one but they speak of B publicly so that B appears deluded like A, while A is the narcissist. Edit: this kind of distrust is what happens after narc abuse. Can't trust even youtube strangers. Maybe you're the narcissist who paints a bad picture of this other person but in reality you are the abuser. We strangers cannot know, so anyone who speaks ill of others might actually be the narcissist lying to themselves and getting reinforcement from these self-help videos.

[@tammyfitzgerald5336]

Yes 🎉here tooo they nuts

[@bethmahoney1142]

If someone you loved was delusional you may feel differently.

[@toloopy]

Some people aren’t interested in understanding because they require conflict in order to feel in control of a person or situation. They manufacture drama and chaos and confusion… to justify the manufactured ‘concern’ they have toward victims of this tactical abuse.

[@hovhanneshovakimyan]

Exactly. This is the best explanation I have ever heard! This is an accurate description of people with a psychopathic mindset.

[@DennisNowland]

As a retired senior mental health care nurse I can assure you that you do not challenge their delusions. You just sit and wait/hope for the medication to work.

[@ellencarpenter3635]

Getting a loved one treatment that refuses treatment is extremely difficult. In most states, you will need to go to the courthouse and file for a petition of emergency wellness. The loved one will be removed in handcuffs so brace yourself. There is less than a 10% chance (in the US) that they will be held. At the most, you can get confirmation that it’s not a UTI, medication, or brain tumor/stroke induced. If the person isn’t going to harm themselves or others, they let them walk.

[@drfoye219]

That was very helpful thank you for uploading

[@tracesprite6078]

One comment that sometimes works is to say, "You believe XYZ. I believe differently. I guess we just see the world differently. I realise that your viewpoint is a very worrying one. However, I don't see the world that way, so I'm not worried about that particular issue. Thanks for sharing, but I don't want to talk about it anymore. "

[@loriebalmer8888]

Hi my son who is 34 is delusional this started about a year ago he has used drugs that's when we tried to get him help for addiction he been in and out of prison county jail we've done what we can for that stuff now with this mental it's really hard to get him help he doesn't think there is anything wrong idk what to do.

[@Oliver_Lim]

I always loved watching and listening to psychology-related videos, especially when dealing with a situation where people of 'certain brains' might be involved, either through intrusion, or sharing a space with someone who might've some forms of mental illness. I hate saying that I'm so right about it, but hearing this confirms further my own analysis that delusional people go by their instinct without the ability to understand the simplicity, or clarity of a statement, and instead, they base it on senseless, illogical conclusions, and execute, or act upon them, regardless of how the other person perceives them that for most part it's better to ignore, and avoid argument knowing that they would never understand. They see the world differently, and oftentimes could only grasp on trivial things to make sense of something instead of using real logic.

[@darrynreid4500]

A good discussion. I like your channel because the topics appear to me to be very effective in bringing the underlying theory to bear in a manner to which it is easy to relate to practical experiences on the slippery fringes of normality. I think there are a whole class of delusional beliefs held by dysfunctional abusive people that are not normally described in these terms. What I have in mind here are beliefs about the rights and obligations of other people: I have experience with people who are so pathological that they openly deny that others, whom they apparently view as their personal property, have basic human rights like privacy, autonomy, self-determination, or any right to dignity and respect. Such people also believe they are entitled to a relationship as a binding right, and one whose terms suit them. I had a toxic relative in my home bellow at me that I don't have the right to have any kind of personal boundaries. This directly contradicts rights clearly provided to everyone under law, including the right to exclude anyone this malignant from one's home and life. I haven't seen such beliefs described as delusions but I think it would help people to do so, because it grounds them in the reality of who really has what lawfully enforceable rights, as opposed to being sucked into the twisted arbitrary alternative universe of the malignant abuser.

[@mzliberty7647]

... narcissistic traits, 'outrageous sense of entitlement' toxic, fur sure..

[@mariagriffin2221]

Persecutory delusions actually can become quite dangerous. There are many videos on defining, describing and coping but the main issue is they will not go to treatment voluntarily. By the time it’s mandated people have been hurt.

[@CP-nf9my]

About 6:25, how to deal with it begins. Thank you.

[@suzannekanaly7217]

My recent ex boyfriend is a marriage therapist with a youtube channel . He has a long trail of failed relationships and when I called him on it he said “ I don’t have a single failed relationship . All of those women went on to find a healthier partner.” He likens himself as some kind of messiah who abuses women to “ heal “ them and Expects a thank you for the abuse .

[@taom9004]

wow

[@jessp8238]

Report him! He should not practice medicine.

[@litrugia]

Ummm…. Would you call that narcissistic personality disorder?

[@Tammy-hm9zr]

wow..spot on straight off 🙏 thankyou

[@doctorstreamspunk9996]

Even when they walk back a kooky idea and apologize, I notice some people never let the idea go. In this case they tend to double down over time with a vengeance. I write these folks off as nut jobs. They deserve sympathy rather than anger, but I have no time for them.

[@yellowdayz1800]

Oh my, thanks so much.

[@Mariaaaaaaaa213]

My friend in college said 6x a week/ 7 months that these guys we knew were obsessed with her. I would ask her questions about his actions that I knew that answer too and she also said 'no', the right answer - yet the big picture was always a yes. For example, HER: 'They're trying SO hard to have sex with me' ME: 'Has he ever said anything sexual to you, or tried to have sex with you at all so far?' HER: 'No' One day I asked her if she thought he WOULD try to have sex with her if he was given the opportunity? HER: 'No'. She would say 4 main statements and if you asked how is he doing #1?, HER: 2, how 2? 3, how 3?, 4, how 4?, 1. She'd go back through the 1-4. So for example, 'how are they trying so hard to get with you, they don't do much of anything?, HER: 'they want me'... I tried telling her no YOU WANT them to WANT YOU.. she wouldn't say anything about it to the guys tho and at the end of the year she finally did and the guy yelled at her to her face and she STILL said 'they're lying and playing hard to get'.. I tried telling her that didn't make sense as she's said all year they wanted her, how are they playing hard to get... playing hard to get you? Does anyone play hard to show they want you when they supposedly want you so badly.. She was also telling her bf 'your not mad at me, your mad at them for wanting me.' And then say ' my bf is so mad that guys want me'... the bf didn't think they wanted her either, we both were begging her. Gaslighting herself and others...

[@saracroft2589]

Thank you for your time and effort

[@DarrenFMagee]

You’re welcome glad you find the topics interesting

[@cherylbommarito5569]

Excellent Advice!

[@taom9004]

Mum [self righteous type] was convinced my dad was plotting to kill her and her husband. 'Well, he sure knows how to play the long game," I said. They haven't laid eyes on each other or exchanged a word for 45 years. She went nuts when my father thought about moving to her part of the country, and explaining he'd been there on holidays a dozen times and made no effort to go near her had no effect. None. She barely took a breath before she went on, and on, and on. She was having a fit and falling in it for a good year, at the possibility of my crippled up, geriatric of a dad living within a thousand miles of her, so I did a whack of research and wrote, [took me hours] an email following the suggestions on an online website and it worked! Poof! It went away, after years of hearing this broken record and I thought I had hacked it! I figured it out and I fixed it. And she went, "Hold my beer." She has shifted on to far more destructive hatreds/targets of people close to home. As a consequence, she has totally alienated a granddaughter and lost an employee. I have gone super grey rock. I have kicked myself and my Dunning-Kroeger arrogance many times. Dad was a safe, distant, [if exhausting grind for me], almost abstract object and any real harm done was harm done decades ago. Instead, I pushed her into opening new boxes of fresh hell.

[@jrperreault7025]

Thanks for sharing this, this is helpful

[@northsouthroad6760]

I have PTSD and practice convincing myself that I am in the here and now, instead of in the past. Is a flashback a delusion?

[@honoryourself2098]

@Vasili ZgR I agree with you.. I have PTSD too and certain things that trigger me, such as a particular ring tone, it does have a very visceral effect on me but triggered and delusional aren’t really the same thing. Delusions can be triggered in a person based on something that only happened in their mind and that haven’t been witnessed or reality checked with another person.

[@nmHispana]

@Lucy 2021 That's the reason why they are called flashbacks and I strongly believe that delusions are also closely related to magical thinking. Convinced and wanting to convince others it's truth and reality, but in fact it's not.

[@simev500]

In my opinion, flashbacks are like residual memories or, a way for the mind to resolve a nagging conflict. Except for the 'triggering' event, they are like dreaming, the subconscious mind does its housekeeping by sorting through all daytime conscious experience to retain only important memories (filing to long term retention during sleep, learning?). The mind is a very good biological puzzle-solving computer, but the amount of information it handles can be a bit overwhelming at times. I, too, have had c-ptsd. Still recovering. I trained myself to interpret my dreams when they are very vivid and have familiar images going back childhood. And this has been a lifetime process that allowed for many a breakthrough allowing me coming to terms with myself. I believe what keeps from getting over the past trauma is the paralyzing fear and psychosomatic pain (physically disabling, even if not permanent) that manifests when the flashbacks happen. So mine has been a rough journey. A most satisfying revelation has been to discover it was nothing more than the vagaries of life when one is most vulnerable in childhood, that flawed parenting made it harder for me. And now I have more control of how my life can potentially be better.

[@mzliberty7647]

@@simev500 ... wow, quite a touching comment... sending all good vibes of Peace and the Strength to endure... i too have c-ptsd... my dreams are ... nightmares ... vivid nightmares.. i dread them .. x

[@Portia620]

@@mzliberty7647 me too and my kids are traumized too from narc and one kid is scared of me and I make her anxious. I was the one being abused in the mess too but she lives with her father now so it is it is what it is. I have nightmares to stay and it gets worse when I’m under stress

[@quantumfineartsandfossils2152]

5:00+ "watch you scuttle about" YES!! like I can die of cancer (provably!!??) & they are like fine die of cancer its insane just unhinged

[@optimumoptimum5091]

Answered my question from your previous video on dillusion disorder. Appreciate it.

[@ag2011_X]

Loved the video

[@a.b.2850]

I’m stuck with a delusional ex-husband and father to my children. He gets really angry over his delusion. I’m scared for my children but CPS won’t do anything.

[@TC-gx3qn]

Thank you for reminding us to be kind- it is challenging when dealing with this. 😌

[@blue_eyed_wonder]

"People that make arrows for other people to shoot at each other"... wow that hit hard.

[@virginiamoss7045]

Trump.

[@wilmawanker367]

Thank you! I always use sarcasm and make everything worse🥶

[@thewoundedhealer4950]

When they show you who they are, believe them. How many strikes before you disengage? There’s nobody out there that can answer that question for you.

[@ParDiss-e4i]

I attract this kind 😂 substance abuser disorders are comorbid the whole time even though it may persist after quitting. It's sad.

[@isobelangeli2053]

Is this like brief psychosis disorder?

[@Poppy-yx8js]

How about when you say to a friend that the person going around suggesting that I’m discriminating against people with her particular problem is “delusional” because my behavior would support the opposite of this and then they proceed to pull a bunch of “pranks” on you - like moving your stuff around or even taking it - makes you look delusional! And even hacks your computer etc! Talk about going to an extreme over a perceived slight!!

[@thankyoudearjesus1]

⭐ ⭐ ⭐ A dear friend of mine is having marital problems. SHE said he's Delusional. HE said he's right and she's gaslighting. How can I get a sense of what's really going on please? They are headed for divorce!

[@user-ey4rc5tu4t]

How do you deal with someone who claims to know if someone else is delusional?

[@dinahsoar6982]

How do you deal with someone who is delusional and wants parts of their body removed? Why do we see so many delusional people today?

[@MariaSantana-ul5wd]

Pray over them as it is demonic. Have them read the Word of God.

[@judeflynn9223]

@@MariaSantana-ul5wd thats so fecking hepful...eejit

[@Xgrid23592]

People’s mental health are in a steep decline.

[@dinahsoar6982]

@@judeflynn9223 actually, prayer is helpful...you may not believe it is..that's fine...but millions upon millions of people do. And people who do are not idiots. They are people of faith...you know, that thing called faith? the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen. The Word of God is powerful.. You can reject it..that's called free will. Do as you please. The rest of us will pray and seek God's face and pray over people who are in bondage to dark things.

[@LandonStrauss-hc1sc]

Segue into religious delusions 😂😂

[@fidelmashelton9491]

Thank you Darren, great advice given...

[@PiaLoveBSNRNCCBTP]

I am just NursePp, watching this video to make sure I am not delusional.

[@marybratz3785]

Does bipolar disorder cause this? I have a cousin who sounds like this & she’s diagnosed with bipolar.

[@youreincredible1648]

What if some one thinks they can take them and their child on a trip half way round the world when they have no money.

[@VijayKumar-ko4hq]

My wife doubts me without any evidence and ask me to accept that I have an affair and left house without my knowledge please help

[@derek5168]

Delusional people are poison to put it simple put your hand in your pocket and help and live for someone else and stop being greedy and selfish

[@brianjones2384]

Delusional people are like the dead who only take but never give or they give to only take what doesn't belong to them. Some of them can change but only if you hold them accountable for their actions,and keep them at arms length at all times.

[@tomkitchen9457]

Speaking of delusions, what about Tina peters?

[@Minisynapse]

Beliefs are so interesting. How can people become convinced without reasons to be convinced? Is a motive enough? Then why aren't we all deluded even though we want some things to be true? Can you protect yourself from delusions by practicing belief formation (epistemology mostly)? I sometimes wonder how you could ever read epistemology and stay psychotic/deluded.

[@derek5168]

Most people are decent if you have a negative experience with someone they are probably just having a bad day or it's just plain misunderstanding

[@KimDrewTheLine]

3:16 persecutory delusions

[@TM-pn3zk]

what about narcissist psychopaths that covertly abuse? Those people sadly run the APA and come up with smear "diagnoses" like this (persecutory delusions) to cover up their abuse. The victims get alienated and gaslighted till they die. Oh and that'll be the "effects of schizophrenia" that caused it, eye roll.

[@isobelle.London]

My narcissistic ex is delusional

[@danieljohnson2349]

DFM 👍

[@emilytaylor1001]

♥️

[@tomkitchen9457]

Wouldn't an aromatic delusion involve farts?

[@KimDrewTheLine]

1:08 subclinical delusions

[@TM-pn3zk]

more like psychologists delusional thoeries. MK Ultra is a real science.

[@GullahGeecheeFarmer]

My Jehovah’s Witness mother

[@TM-pn3zk]

tur