Dating "Nice Guys" Horror Stories

▶ Watch more AskReddit stories: • Reddit on Tap - Latest...
🛎Subscribe to Reddit On Tap for daily videos! / @ontapstudios
[Serious] Girls who have been guilted into going out with a "nice guy", how did it go?
#Reddit #AskReddit

[@adrianghandtchi1562]

Man that sister in the first story, what the hell was wrong with her? What the hell is she going to get out of that? Does she want a pat on the back for setting people up that do not want to or should not be together?

[@PoptartParasol]

It's just so she can take credit for the relationship down the line if it becomes more serious... honestly she reminds me of Skyler's sister in Breaking Bad -_-

[@Outlaw7263]

People like that exist unfortunately, they just like to play matchmaker for one reason or another, ego or they want to double date by any means necessary

[@lazypandaland]

Maybe she didn't want to seem like a bad friend? But it did show she was a bad sister lol

[@shopece8807]

It's called being a 'male-identified' woman and they unfortunately are NOT that rare (and no I don't mean like ftm male-identified).

[@jbark678]

@@shopece8807 I feel like this is the PC version of pick-me

[@mztweety1374]

When a friend tells you a guy makes her uncomfortable, you listen to her!! Tf is wrong with these people!?

[@oOBlueFireOo]

When it comes to those words, it's never a joke. I personally only say that kind of shit when I mean it. For someone to assume that it's a joke is so risky, bc u never know who has mental illness, whether genetic or if they had an injury. So some people r really fucking creepy, and should be pointed out so that they can get help and others can be safe.

[@aga3852]

@@oOBlueFireOo Yep, exactly. That goes for whoever you identify as. I had told my mom many times I dislike people and then we come to realize those people *might* not have been the best people

[@keybored67]

girl cried wolf

[@aga3852]

@@keybored67 That's true too

[@oOBlueFireOo]

@@keybored67 yeah, that's true too, but that's why u talk to the person, and if u can tell they need help, u say something about it and tell whoever was uncomfortable with them to avoid them.

[@rebeccamount50]

Perks of being ugly. You don't have to deal with stuff like this.

[@daddyemu7047]

I’m glad that I’m ugly, no guy has come up to me and that has conditioned me to love being alone but also with a crippling need to be in a relationship😂💀

[@MissEasyPeasySleasy]

Perks of being fat, too

[@champ1159]

Im a guy and Im ugly so I don't think girls would let me even get that close 😅

[@cvf253]

Oh hush A. you are not ugly B. Everybody likes a different cup of tea aka not everyone likes the same ol same ol looking people.

[@shopece8807]

My former "nice guy" was actually NOT a looker esp compared to most of the guys I had dated but he has a great sense of humor in the beginning anyways. So.....ijs.

[@victoriapeay3019]

Shit like this is why parents need to teach their sons how to handle rejection. No girl owes you a romantic relationship just because you are nice to them. I could barely make it through this video because the sheer rage these stories were giving me.

[@suonatar1]

Agree. Stop with the "boys will be boys" trope and stupid rom-coms and songs with "we are meant to be together" message.

[@Andy-ly2tz]

Or how little kids are taught to just keep insisting until they get a chance, and if they don't then she's a bitch. Just horrible.

[@suonatar1]

@@SvensktTroll 1. What makes you think fatherless boys "always" end up being criminals? I know a couple of single moms and their sons ended up pretty well. 2. Nobody's forcing anyone to behave like the opposite sex. We only start to expect, that men and women behave in a healthy way towards each other. A lot of boy's bad behavior is put off as "boys will be boys", instead of correcting that behavior. How can they learn to respect other sex, if they are allowed to mistreat them?

[@suonatar1]

@@SvensktTroll I don't know where your research comes from, and apparently we talk about totally different situations.

[@URPndJs]

@@SvensktTroll troll

[@fancyf33t295]

Repeatedly telling girls that you're a "nice guy" is about as helpful as saying "I'm not crazy." I'm not crazy but the more I extol my sanity the less likely anyone is to believe me. Just saying. I'm not crazy by the by.

[@sorasky2927]

totally. actual nice people dont need to keep telling you how nice they are. they just are nice

[@lv3223]

Now I’m wondering how I’m suppose to feel about every time I’ve been called a nice guy. I really don’t know if it’s a compliment anymore or something else.

[@sorasky2927]

@@lv3223 i dont think you need to be worried, theres a pretty big difference between going around repeating over and over how "nice" you are vs other people saying that about you. the key lies in self awareness and humility

[@lv3223]

@@sorasky2927 thanks 😊 that actually helps 😅

[@champ1159]

@@lv3223 I actually feel the same dude😅

[@WayWardWonderer]

Saying it right here and now: NO ONE "owes" anyone a shot! You don't have to go out with anyone (male or female) who makes you uncomfortable because of peer pressure! Respect boundaries and respect people when they say "NO!"

[@parisgreen4600]

Yes! Like the saying goes, "'No' is a complete sentence."

[@mattaffenit9898]

No one owes anyone anything. That includes a "shot" or whatever the hell else. You get a "shot" if you have qualities deemed worth giving a "shot."

[@crystalgemgirl731]

Thank you! It's like what Meg from Hercules said, "They think 'no' means 'yes' and 'get lost' means 'take me, I'm yours'.

[@cashwalk7253]

Shout it louder for the people in the back 👏👏👏

[@IsraelCountryCube]

So much male hating comments and females with biased opinions. It’s making me feel uncomfortable already. Their insecurities are disturbing because they’re willing to say all their unnecessary emotional baggage into the internet. I’ve done it but I try not to. It looks like females do it compulsively for attention and it doesn’t matter what it is.

[@frightbat208]

What concerns me in these stories, is the number of times females have second guessed their inner intuition about these guys. “I thought I was being too picky”, “I thought I was being a judgemental bitch” etc. Girls, LISTEN to your inner instinct and don’t second guess yourself. You do NOT owe the world of men your “niceness” in order to preserve their feelings. Be safe!

[@kurapikakurta1997]

Same goes for men, the amount of times I’ve opened up to a girl and they used my deepest fears against me-

[@juliac9080]

I wish I gave myself this permission when I was younger!

[@nenmaster5218]

Creeps are an Issue. If you wanna see and/or support some Awareness-Raising, then Pop Culture Detective, Emkay and Hbomberguy, together with Kappa Kaiju, are probably the biggest Awareness-Raisers.

[@notactuallyacat.]

My mom always told me to trust my gut feeling. “You have it for a reason. _Listen to it.”_ Don’t ever doubt yourself because “Maybe I’m overthinking it” or “Maybe they’re not that bad.” If you don’t feel comfortable around someone, then get away from them

[@lorianabanana6066]

Yup. You always hear NiceGuys whining about how 'nO oNe wIlL gIvE mE a ChAnCe' But here's the thing. We as women who are often 1/2 the size of adult men have to learn to refine our intuition QUICK. Otherwise we end up in a basement putting lotion in a basket... If you are scaring away women, ask yourself WHY. Why do women obviously feel uncomfortable around you? Are you coming on too strong? Invadng her space? Seeming controlling? Too emotional too quick? And if you are only being nice to get into her pants- you aren't actually 'nice'. You are USING HER. Nobody likes that feeling. Romantic/sexual relationships are just like any other. Nobody 'owes' you friendship, trust, respect etc. You EARN THESE. Same thing. You earn love & affection over time by geniunely caring for others. Why these dudes think women 'owe' them I'll never get. It's so entitled.

[@mentak2593]

I dated a ‘nice guy’ at the recommendation of a friend. He ended up stalking me and I had to change my phone number. He mailed letters to my workplace for about a year until I heard he died of a freak heart attack. 10 years later I went to a psychic for a Tarot card reading and she said “I don’t know if this means anything to you, but a Jeff says Hi.” So apparently he will be waiting for me in the afterlife too.

[@windmoonsoon4472]

beat his ass and send him to the shadow realm, so sorry about that

[@lavenderquartz9323]

Tf uh go to church or something thats all the advice I have ajsbwiwbskb

[@tosinakin2508]

@@lavenderquartz9323 This. Stuff's weird.

[@MHPAM]

Well, hopefully dude's in hell and you're in heaven. (not trying to shove religion down people's throats just my own belief)

[@olymolly3637]

Nah don't worry, even of he meets you there it's to apologise.

[@HoneyBakedHamlet]

I gave a Nice Guy a go... now im a Domestic Violence survivor with ptsd. 👌

[@bigdumby7019]

I’m sorrry you went through that! I feel like these guys are controlling and crazy like that

[@HoneyBakedHamlet]

@@bigdumby7019 This dude ended up treating me like his own personal punching bag and servant, sweety. They think that having a partner in their lives will magically make all their personal problems and insecurities disappear when the reality of it is, they tend to project them onto that person and becoming a really abusive individual. I wish i didnt know from personal experience, but sadly, i do.

[@ceosgamer016_5]

Damm hope you get beter

[@CanadaxIreland]

Same as hun, SA survivor 😔 its rough but we will get through it. If you ever need a stranger to vent to, I am here. Survivors need to look out for eachother 😊

[@HoneyBakedHamlet]

@@ceosgamer016_5 Its been a few years and some therapy later, im doing ok now. I still have certain things that trigger me, but im well on the road to recovery x

[@jimmiedmc1]

reformed nice guy here: i was raised in the middle of nowhere with my mentally slow brother and my toxic parents, i didnt have a healthy example of a relationship, dad an alcoholic mom a enabler, im sorry for all the "nice guys" that had a similar upbrining, i had to learn to love myself first im not quite there but one day, also i dont think i was as bad or threatning as some of these guys but hearing it from the other side of the fence made me realize now just how bad i might have been, or percieved from peers, again no excuesses its no ones job to teach us whats appropriate or expected

[@christieclay-baker2093]

You're very good looking

[@jimmiedmc1]

@@christieclay-baker2093 🙂

[@adrianghandtchi1562]

We all have a story and I’m glad you shared yours, it’s great to hear that you found yourself in a position to learn how to improve yourself as you wish to.

[@jimmiedmc1]

@@adrianghandtchi1562 I originally wasnt but realised there was no nice guys taking ownership ither the channell didnt select them for the video or I'm of a few that can self reflect and express why and how some nice guys are created, still dont feel safe dont think we deserve a second chance for anything

[@roxanno1075]

@@adrianghandtchi1562 yes! And that he made that inner choice to actually do it!

[@remingtonpeterson7788]

these have helped me realize i dated a "nice guy"

[@karlacastillo6838]

Same! When I broke up with him he played the victim card with our mutual friends... So I don't talk with any of those people anymore

[@remingtonpeterson7788]

@@karlacastillo6838 mine got suicidal on me then also did it to our mutual friends. He started seeing anyone u was friends with as a threat.

[@karlacastillo6838]

@@remingtonpeterson7788 damn, I hope you are feeling better now. If I learned something from that experience is that I deserve respect and love and so do you ☺️. Greetings from Mexico (and sorry for my english it's not my first language)

[@remingtonpeterson7788]

@@karlacastillo6838 Same Karla. i did learn and i found an amazing man who loves me. i wish you the best in your love endeavors :) Love from USA

[@karlacastillo6838]

@@remingtonpeterson7788 That's so good!! I wish you all the happiness in the world to both of you.

[@grandsome1]

The saying:"Nice guys don't need a girlfriend, they need therapy" is always true. I'm still de-programming the nice guy mentality and toxic masculinity out of my head, changing is hard and slow but it's the right thing to do.

[@ADMICKEY]

I probably need thearpy because of my life, but I'm pretty sure it won't help me

[@ludmilamaiolini6811]

Kudos for trying to get better! Behind the “nice guy” mentality there is probably a lot of pain. Therapy isn’t only good for future partners, but for yourself and your well-being. Good luck!

[@Anna133199]

It's wonderful you're working on yourself! You acknowledging that you need therapy puts you miles ahead of most 'nice guys'.

[@Kitchfox]

Honestly none of the storeys here have nice guys in them

[@modderbad]

Good luck!!

[@heresyisecstasy]

I was guilted into dating "the nice guy" twice. Two abusive relationships. Nice Guy A was the liberal woke flavor of nice guy who pressured me into the relationship; a year in he would go to his women's studies classes during the day and when he came home he would use my face as a punching bag. I had bruises on my thighs for two years straight. When I finally left he attempted suicide in my bathroom after texting everyone we knew, including my boss, telling them I was the reason he was doing it. Nice Guy B was the sensitive artistic flavor. By the end of the relationship three years later he had gotten me pregnant on purpose, abandoned me during my miscarriage, had drained my finances so I couldn't leave, and had started making threats against my life and his own. I had to stay with friends for 6 months to get away from him. Nice Guys aren't nice guys.

[@ellaforlin8160]

Guys that are faux ‘woke’ and sensitive are so scary to me. It’s one thing to date a nice guy that everyone knows is an asshole, but it’s another to date someone whose outward appearance is so positive. Other people are less likely to believe you when you describe the nice guy’s negative attributes, and sometimes you can end up gaslighting yourself into thinking you are being irrational. I’m glad you got out of those toxic relationships. Stay strong and keep safe.

[@nenmaster5218]

Creeps are an Issue. If you wanna see and/or support some Awareness-Raising, then Pop Culture Detective, Emkay and Hbomberguy, together with Kappa Kaiju, are probably the biggest Awareness-Raisers.

[@octavia1996]

Liberal men are the most unhappy type of people on average, and as the old saying goes hurt people, 𝘩𝘶𝘳𝘵 𝘱𝘦𝘰𝘱𝘭𝘦.

[@musicmaggs]

I hope you're doing okay 🤍 those experiences are horrible, I hope you're getting the love and support you need and deserve

[@DarksideGmss0513]

Dear God. I'm sorry you had to go through all of that. I'm glad you're no longer in those situations.

[@lhproductions61]

He abused me for almost a year. He was great as a friend but when we dated he was jealous of everyone. Would sneak into my phone at night while I was sleeping block random people he didn’t want me speaking to and accused me of cheating. Threw things at me. Called me a worthless sl*t and accused me of all sorts of awful things. He was a virgin when we met and got angry I told everybody.

[@samuellatta6774]

Holy shit... I mean... I can be jealous too sometimes but not for no reason.... Which normal guy secretly goes through his gf's phone?

[@jordainereboe3917]

That's not a nice guy!

[@MHPAM]

@@samuellatta6774 Well, it's a good thing to do if you have a suspicion about them. Can also be a relief of mental pain once you find out they are innocent.

[@dublk5593]

Wow that sucks but my only thing is why do people see being a virgin as a insult I kinda wish I still was for religious reasons but that aside I don’t see why people act like it’s a bad thing to be one?

[@lhproductions61]

@@samuellatta6774 He was super insecure. A friend of mine was going through a divorce and we would get into arguments every time he would come over to vent about how she was lying in court or other shitty things. I left him and he had his mother text me and say i led him on because he wanted to marry me.

[@queteimportaa.2535]

Moral of the story, never pity men and go out with them. If you don't like them or find them odd is for a reason. Follow your instincts they are there to warn us.

[@animetiddies3424]

The pity part hit hard. I used to date this guy when I was in 6th grade. Puppy love. And we broke up because he moved and when we started high school I saw him again and was interested until he started saying he loves me a month after we talked and I felt weirded out since we were only 13/14 and when I told him I lost feelings he threatened to kill himself and hurt me and my friends through my freshman year

[@nicoleharrington9086]

Been doing that since I was 15

[@mariahhall8481]

True and I’m finding out he’s this way.

[@nicholasohara5699]

I'm scared for women when I hear these types boys are running around.

[@Twistedmist]

Im scared for women who dont know how to just ignore these people.

[@kuro-kuromi32]

@@Twistedmist but it’s also not as simple as ignoring them, there can be so many other layers to it

[@nyomecoverdale8658]

@@Twistedmist also some of these people aren't so obvious about the creepy part, they may seem like someone you can trust

[@nyomecoverdale8658]

Literally every nice guy story video like this has some that include rape/ sexual assault

[@nicholasohara5699]

There needs to be some gladiatorial battle with these creeps. Tell them they'll get the beautiful women if they win. The thing is, the games would never stop so they'd all just end themselves in a fruitless battle. Maybe we do normal men vs these types of people. Maybe we make it a pay per view lol

[@ChuChild]

My nice guy made me tell him about my trauma by saying "you need to be transparent with me . If not you don't care about me and I'm not staying" Remember, ladies, no one is entitled to know about your trauma. :) it had never happened to me before, but turns out he was a narcissist after I researched it.

[@glorfindelchocolateflowery6392]

But what about when parents do it also? Society still requires you to be in a relationship with them

[@cutienerdgirl]

You don't have to have a relationship with your toxic parents. Fuck whoever says you do because they don't have to experience what you're experiencing.

[@AnnaGirardini]

Narcissists always want to know about your trauma, for later use

[@damien678]

this kinda thing is why I also take issue with people saying others are toxic if they don't talk about ALL of their feelings and whats troubling them. like... sometimes im in the middle of a trauma-response and its the least "toxic" option for myself and others if i just say "ill feel better soon dw". sometimes ppl need time to process these feelings, even after they felt them. and it's ok for us to not want to get into it, even after processing it. we don't owe others our trauma.

[@wiggilytaco7570]

Story at 18:00 about how she was pressured into committing sexual acts breaks my heart. Its so common to hear these stories especially with younger women who are insecure with sex and their bodies

[@missybennet1594]

Here before somebody says something like “jUsT rEfUsE hIM iTs nOt tHaT hArD”

[@lilscenechick1995]

That was borderline rape, imo...Clearly her boundaries and enjoyment were not a concern, for him. It breaks my heart she was going through all this as a teen. Where tf were her parents??? It's so disgusting how it's been normalized that girls' bodies are little more than objects to be used, not respected.

[@SKOLAH]

I had a 'partner' who used sleep deprivation to coerce me into sex. I didn't want it. But I needed sleep. He was verbally, financially and emotionally abusive too. Another one would molest me in my sleep then deny it. I felt disgusting. He too was verbally, finanially and emotionally abusive. Another one was on top of my having sex with me while I was crying. I COULD go on. And on. But I won't. Nearly 10 years single and I don't think I'll ever change that, no matter how much I want to love a decent man. And I do want to. Very much. But the abuse risks are just too high. 💔😞

[@Karma-zx8qe]

There's no risk to dating a decent guy

[@wiggilytaco7570]

@@Karma-zx8qe do you think you’re a decent guy?

[@roxanno1075]

These aren't nice guys. These are creeps. Psychopaths. Unfortunately (me included) women tend to have to experience or witness these types of men a number of time before we can see the signs and not even start anything with this type of guy. I know I had to. And thankfully I finally learned and I'm engaged to a true man. And it is night and day difference between him and the other tools I dated in my life. It has made me so truly grateful for how he treats me and respects me. Everyday. Not when things are "good" but all day every day.

[@olymolly3637]

It's a label... Like Karens. There's also Nice Girls that behave like Nice Guys too.

[@shopece8807]

There's a reason why there are air quotes around nice guys. That is because "nice guys" are usually the biggest creeps, psychopaths and a holes.

[@willywonka8004]

Cheers I'll drink to that

[@muffetmissulena6540]

You must be new to the world of nice guys.

[@davidepintus6490]

Yeah but the fact is, they are all keen on pointing out how nice they are.

[@Werewolf.with.Internet.Access]

“That sounds like my boy!” Yes, and it sounds like you completely failed as a parent to raise him if that’s how he treats people he’s romantically interested in.

[@ludmilamaiolini6811]

And she even laughed…

[@selinesbeau]

Or she tried and he's just decided to be a tool.

[@mariahhall8481]

Right I’ve heard this many times. Didn’t raise him to be a decent boyfriend.

[@DistantClover]

My lil sis HATED my first boyfriend and I love her for it. Because she heard that I was guilt tripped and peer pressure to date him.

[@riordan381]

True story. My sister whose 1 year older than me had this kinda stalking "Nice Guy". After their breakup, he started following her and trying to argue about getting back together. One day, he came to my lawn and tried to grab my sister's hand and drag her,. I was sitting in the living room, heard some commotion. Ran out, and without a question, ran and kneed this guy face. Broke 5 teeths and a jaw fracture. 👍

[@uchikattana]

Good job

[@user-jd1cp1nk1p]

Well done

[@Grass6507]

Ay nice

[@NightmarePete]

The one who punched the girl in the face multiple times, really boiled my blood.

[@__-_.]

@@FirstnameLastnames how about neither of those things?

[@mattaffenit9898]

Boiled? My blood exploded from the increase in heat output. I am now a thoroughly pissed off red mist.

[@ADMICKEY]

Just saying if someone tried to punch me I'd use all my rage against them

[@mattaffenit9898]

@@ADMICKEY Same. Well... kind of. If I used *all* of it, there'd be no *person* left. Just a mound of wet meat and shattered bone.

[@friendlystoryphantom2043]

"I just can't control my love for them!!!" *Sarcasm* Oh, yeah...I totally get it. It's just like how I can't control me setting your bed on fire, while you're in it. Oh, hey look! My family's here too!! I told them all about you. I am no longer being sarcastic, if anyone man or woman, puts their hands on you without you wanting them to, and they claim it's love, run like the Devil's on your heels!

[@Iennaish]

I'm too much of a misanthrope to be guilted into dating a nice guy. I might befriend them for some time but if they push my boundaries, I will just cut them off... Not nicely.

[@HackersSun]

Hahah Short fuse too? :D

[@Iennaish]

@@HackersSun Not exactly, I can be very patient with someone but only up to a point. If that line is crossed, I just don't care anymore. Actually, I hate being guilted or manipulated into anything. Last time, a guy used his friend's death to get closer to me. I do not talk to him anymore, if we were in a same room except if we needed to work together, I wouldn't acknowledge his existence.

[@ADMICKEY]

@@Iennaish pretty sure that guy wasn't a nice guy,my best friend, Justice is what I would call a nice person he helped me with talking to people,have fun and him being just helped me mentally,no one else could come over because of my twin brother's medical things and my Mom having cancer she got from bad luck my bro died in 2018, justice in 2019 and my mom just a few Days ago. Ps: I'm a guy that's single, 15 and doesn't want to mingle....

[@Iennaish]

@@ADMICKEY I'm sorry for your losses, good people are precious, although they left, they left you with the strength of how deeply they loved and cared for you.

[@nicolenicole6325]

People who push my boundaries after I’ve repeatedly told them It makes me uncomfortable go in the garbage in 0.1 sec

[@cheshirewitch7560]

I married a "nice guy". Handsome, charming, smart, bit edgy, older (he was 20yo and I was 16yo when we met). Over the course of our 8 year (6 married) relationship he turned into the most abusive twat imaginable. When I was 16 a few of my friends said he gave them bad vibes, and avoided him at all costs...but teen me was in love and didn't listen. I learned many life lessons the hard way because of it, but at least I can spot a nice guy a mile away now.

[@youneverseeanoldmaneatinga7416]

He didn't turn into that bad, abusive person. He always was. He just hid it enough to make you his victim, then showed his true colours. So glad to hear you're out of it now and I'm sure you're much wiser and happier 👏🏻

[@cheshirewitch7560]

@bigbeargaming7608 to be fair, I was just a kid and was conceted enough to think I could tell if someone was a good person or not. I was very obviously shit at that, and had no idea what a red flag even was. Worst part is my parents, who should've been wiser than my teenage dumbass, allowed it. They aren't good people either.

[@nuclearfist420]

My girlfriend's mom is forcing her to date "nice guys" I pray to god I never lose her because of it. Edit: When I traveled to her country to see my girlfriend, my girlfriend's mom explained to me that she's heard many horror stories about guys who promise the whole world to girls and they never come. She thought I was one of those guys. My girlfriend is my fiance now and I get along with her parents very well now.

[@ADMICKEY]

That's quite a problem,I hope things get better for ya

[@rebeccawhite3731]

Hol up

[@BankruptMonkey]

A friend hooked me up with a nice guy who proceeded to stalk me for several months. Turns out she wanted me to date him so he'd stop stalking her. We aren't friends anymore.

[@amethysting3389]

A whole lot of yikes out here.

[@ludmilamaiolini6811]

Glad you aren’t friends anymore

[@mimiandy1683]

For me, I was: - Sexually assaulted by a "nice guy". -Another guy: He saw a picture of me that was in a relative's photo album. Thought I was attractive and wanted to speak to me. My aunt told me about him. But I wasn't interested. One day, he ended up running a red light in front of cops. Was stopped. Cops ran his license and was arrested for a warrant. He killed his children's mother.

[@murdermeharry8703]

I just wanted to let y'all know pressuring your friends into "giving him(or her) a chance" is a shitty thing to do. I know YOU might not know or see why this person makes your friends uncomfortable, but THEY clearly do and pressuring them into doing something they dont want to do is shitty. Espicially of they've expressed concern that the person is dangerous or unstable. Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk.

[@Idontknow-zs2jj]

I gave a "nice guy" a chance but soon told him I just wanted to be friends. He agreed but proceeded to be very clingy and get angry whenever I met up with my guy friends or didn't respond to his texts immediately. He even called me a whore for going to a bar with some of my male friends :) Somehow we still remained friends and after 2 years he started seeing another girl and suddenly he wanted us to be more distant, so his "girlfriend" wouldn't think of us the wrong way🤦‍♀️. She broke up with him after a month (I wonder why🤪)

[@ludmilamaiolini6811]

I’m seeing a pattern here… “nice guys” aren’t the guys that are genuinely nice. They are the guys who feel entitled to women, and use ocasional niceness to make a move. As in, they hold the door for you, and then expect sex in return (the example was over the top, it’s just an analogy). And then they get agressive when they get rejected

[@jigen0972]

Hearing "he's a nice guy" sets of sooooooooo many warning bells. "Nice people" don't tend to understand anything resembling rejection and get volatile. Edit : typo 2nd Edit : to all the complainers in replys I put "Nice people" in quotes for a reason.

[@micahthomas2544]

Yeah that's the opposite of nice and it would be nice if you dont say stupid stuff like that. Nice and having mental issues are two different things stop putting the two on the same page

[@vamppanic]

@@micahthomas2544 people who call themselves “nice” are more often than not creeps

[@diecast-innracingleague9022]

I guess the term nice guys has changed. in my day women wanted nice guys. Actually nice,respectful not assholes, not jerks but apparently I guess nowadays the nice guy term means you're a creepoid or that you have a boring personality I can't keep up with changing social definitions. When I was younger all I heard from women was, how they couldn't meet a nice guy how they met guys that treated them like shit and blah blah blah... in my experience when women have dated nice guys, the the relationships don't last because the female gets bored apparently not enough drama...

[@micahthomas2544]

@@diecast-innracingleague9022 that's the thing there is no changing. People just like changing definitions instead of learning them

[@micahthomas2544]

@@vamppanic notice how in almost all these situations it wasnt the person calling themselves nice

[@spacequeen8329]

I think the deal with "nice guys" is they have no experience of normal conflict, being stuck in a toddlerlike state in their relations to other people (why they divide the world into "nice" and "not nice" people eg) so when they see a normal couple argue, they think "that's not nice, I wouldn't argue" and then ion an actual relationship, they find out everyone argues, and they can't handle the shock of learning that they're not better than other people, they argue too, and they use manipulation to block the awareness of their own imperfection, their ability to be annoyed. tl;dr Men who use childish terms like "nice guy" and "bad boy" are not mature enough to be with anyone.

[@damien678]

this as well as the fact a lot of the way they talk and see things comes directly from incel shit.

[@apeman6059]

If a girls rejection makes you rage against your crush you need to learn to take rejection better 🤦‍♂️ and One reason fake nice guys are created is because people get rewarded to much for being good

[@damien678]

i think its less that we reward good behaviour too much (im pretty sure, psychologically, the best way to get the result you want is positive rewards/reinforcement), its that they see women as rewards and not as... people. a lot of misogyny is the core thing rotting these men.

[@cashwalk7253]

If someone rejecting your “niceness” causes you to rage, then you aren’t nice. You are a manipulative punk that needs to go home and rethink their life.

[@otakumangastudios3617]

By the way it’s not even rejection, it’s them expressing incompatibility romantically speaking. The reason why these guys take it as rejection, is likely because they have a ton of mommy issue baggage where basically they were emotionally rejected many many times by their mother figure, and when this is done dealt with, often times are not conscious of it and actually they tend to be the exact same people that when you first meet them, brag about how much they love their mom and how close they are to them. That’s a major red flag, because this means that they are subconsciously trying to convince themselves they don’t have any trauma, as a maladaptive means of surviving with the crippling PTSD they have from child abuse and neglect coming from specifically the mother. This can happen the other way too, which is why there are women who avidly hate men and objectify men. This is likely because they didn’t have any healthy relationships with males growing up, so their wiring literally is created to see men as a threat, even though they are simultaneously sexually attracted by them. It’s the same case with the insoles, they have dealt with trauma regarding the opposite gender, but they don’t realize it. This is kind of purposeful by the nervous system, as the nervous system has now decided that anyone of the female gender has certain toxic attributes to them, they are therefore not trustworthy as human beings. This is what causes their avid toxic attitudes and behavior, because they’re literally looking through a negativity lens, their trauma from certain women in their past causes them to see all women as a danger. Same thing with man haters, every man in their life growing up was toxic and destructive to them, causing them to see men in that light regardless of whether they actually are like that or not. Think of it as the being scared of dogs trauma thing. Say there’s a child that got mauled by the neighbors dog when he was 18 months old. This causes his nervous system to do what his program to do, tell him that canines are not safe, because since he was injured severely by a canine, the brain wants to prevent him from that happening ever again, so he has a PTSD response whenever he encounters a dog ever since. He screams and cries, etc. I’ve seen some of these people in adulthood just avidly hate dogs though, and they don’t seem to understand that this isn’t normal. There are definitely some that realize that they have dealt with trauma, which that’s the first step is to realize you have it, but again the brain doesn’t want you to know that you have on dealt with trauma, because again this is a prehistoric sub protection mechanism to make sure you don’t get harmed again. Logically speaking, it makes zero sense to avoid every single dog, since most dogs are actually pretty sweet. But again, the brain doesn’t know that, and the brain and nervous system doesn’t actually act as logically as people would think, which explains why we humans aren’t all that logical. So that being said, an incel brain is literally wired to hate women. This does not mean that they can’t change this, you always can change your nervous system, but it’s not particularly an easy process by any means. The major difference is, the people who recognize they have a problem and are proactively trying to do anything they can to fix it, and the people who are letting their caveman brain take over, allowing them to be actually scared of something that they don’t have to be. Again if a man’s only experience growing up was a horrible, horrible woman who was supposed to be the very person to make him feel loved, he’s gonna carry around a lot of baggage. His brain is going to tell him that women are trustworthy even though he has a strong inclination to be sexually involved with women, even emotionally. He desperately wants to be in a Relationship yet he has so much baggage that he doesn’t even realize he has, and believes that it’s every woman’s fault but really it’s his mother’s fault, his mother rejected him, his mother was the one who negated his feelings, his mother was the one who belittled him, his mother was the one who portrayed women as superior, whose mother was the one who made him feel bad for being male. Not any other woman, except for her. Again, this taught his brain that women are not safe while simultaneously trying to protect him from further trauma and abuse from her by also convincing him that he deeply loves her and has a great connection with her. This is the textbook definition of Stockholm syndrome, that your brain reacts to certain trauma and abuse associated with a person or group of people as a means of coping by validating behavior and or burying it in some other manner. This causes underlying problems, and in this case, it would be violently hating women

[@ramaa6064]

the number of times i heard a variant of "ill give him a chance maybe im just being pricey/a bitch" is so upsetting. my biggest takeaway is to literally just trust my gut instincts about people/men and to not care so much about APPEARING kind. I don't owe anyone anything just bc they say they like me.

[@laRataVoloira]

Guess my ex was a "nice guy". I should have run far far away when he made me write a list of my ex partners, divided into categories based of how far we went.

[@ChuChild]

YO THATS WILD WHAT

[@ADMICKEY]

Wait what?

[@jennymunday7913]

I would have only written his name and said NOWHERE after it. o-o dude full on made you do homework?!

[@laRataVoloira]

@@jennymunday7913 dude made me do homework for real and i was dumb enough to stay with him for four years

[@jennymunday7913]

@@laRataVoloira They trap you and make it seem reasonable. Mine found old messages from another guy from before we were dating and yelled at me for dating other people before him. XD I'm a divorced mom..... hate to break it to you dude.... XD

[@neverlandonearth77]

This made me happy to have my husband in my life. I always knew what I wanted, someone similar to myself. Took years and years and a lot of the kinds of guys mentioned in this video showed up in my life and I just kept searching. I finally found the man I eventually married. He didn't have the physical appearance I was usually (typically) attracted to, but he was kind, respectful, had a heart of gold, and was genuinely loving and considerate, gave me space and allowed me to have boundaries, he's got a nice, clear (sane) mind, he respects his family and treats everyone well. His gentle manner and clear headed mental state with the respect he shows won me over. BTW, I was the clingy one, but he really didn't mind it. He has a LOT of patience. The patience he had with me while dating carried over into marriage. This just proves he's genuine. He is my best friend. And as it turns out, when he lets his beard stubble grow in, he develops a handsome look he doesn't have while clean shaven. (And I never knew this because I was NEVER a beard girl before, and he was always clean shaven). So, happy ending.

[@APHRODITEEEEEE]

When I was like 19 my mom told me not to settle in a relationship with a mediocre guy I don't really like and that I'm so pretty. I was like YOU WAITED 19 YEARS TO TELL ME THAT!?!? She was shocked I didn't know I was pretty she said. I only knew me as myself I didn't know about objective beauty etc. Anyway I'm just putting this out here cause I realized that many girls are tricked because they have low self esteem! Girl listen I say this and I mean it. Every person is beautiful in their own way. Be yourself, focus on yourself and good people will come trust me. Took me a while but I realized when I started minding my own business, had time for myself and enjoying my hobbies that's when the good guys came to my life. I'm still friends with them today and that's really awesome 👍 You got it I believe in you ✊

[@venkateshkarthik568]

Observations made : the ones that call themselves indirectly or directly nice guys are not really nice guys, that's called being a douchebag. No one can see their own back in the mirror properly, calling yourself a nice guy is a perfect example of that

[@mr350znismo7]

Some of these stories are horrible. Especially the pacific island girl.

[@rachelquaye-asamoah5386]

In that one I feel like the guy was looking for a mother figure😬

[@hyouka4567]

That one shattered me because they were friends for AGES??? And he ended up being that type of person in a relationship. I wouldn’t be surprised if she developed serious trust issues after that

[@An262.]

I'm so glad i knew about nice guys before my first official date. Guy was a complete incel nice guy type. Expected me to fall head over heels for him even though he told me i am "as boring as a brick wall" after saying "i don't care" to everything i said

[@pianomanhere]

There are many truly nice, good guys, but having to sort through all of the fake nice ones is the bane of existence for good people who want to find compatible partners.

[@amarareed2432]

When I was 14 my mother used to force me to hangout with the creepy neighbor guy who was 22, he was really into me he used to call me non stop I had to leave the phone off the hook. When he couldn't call me he would just show up at my mother's house and she would let him in to harass about wtf my problem is and why I didn't want a nice guy to treat me like a queen, it took my school's social worker to tell my mother she would do everything in her power to have her thrown in jail if she didn't cut the shit and tell the guy to leave me alone. He stalked me until I was 18 and tried to breakdown my friends door to give me a birthday card her neighbor heard the hullabaloo and held him at gun point till the police arrested his ass.

[@wiggilytaco7570]

That's fucking insane! That's must've been terrifying to not even be safe in your home and how your mom threw you into the fire like that. My mom did the same except he lived with us. He ended up moving out thou for whatever reason, I never asked about it.

[@amarareed2432]

@@wiggilytaco7570 My mother and I never had a relationship, she used me to keep my father on the hook until I got tired of her hurting him. I don't expect a relationship where there never was one, I'm fine with it not everyone is supposed to be a parent my mom survives one 3 things food, water & compliments.

[@wiggilytaco7570]

@@amarareed2432 "until I got tired ofnher hurting him" you were able to stop her? How so?

[@amarareed2432]

@@wiggilytaco7570 once I turned 16 I was able to leave my mom and go live with my father and his family, she was well known to the CPS system and the police that helped with my escape. I had to play the long game and endure my mom's narcissism.

[@wiggilytaco7570]

@@amarareed2432 honestly the fact that it took an entire team to save you after so long is just so frustrating when you already had a capable and loving patent available to you. Mom's are favored too highly

[@windmoonsoon4472]

nice guys usually go after young people cause they literally just don't know everything about everything, so be warry an take care and girls if hes older then you but cant meet you half way youre too mature for him.

[@jcortese3300]

I was stuck with him for 7 years and was so relieved when it finally ended that I stayed single for good.

[@puppetpawss]

A lot of these people need new friends. I couldn’t imagine knowing somebody is a creep, a perv, or potentially dangerous, especially towards women, and still encourage a female friend of mine to “give him a chance.” How could you live with yourself knowing somebody you consider a friend is somebody you willingly put into harms way especially when ignoring the red flags beforehand or the flags they speak to you on afterwards.

[@3ggztr3m3b33tz]

15:44 FYI, these are straight up abuse tactics.

[@damien678]

ty steven

[@stephanc6138]

"if his THAT nice, then YOU date him." to those who'd set you up.

[@user-jd1cp1nk1p]

This is exactly the case here. That sister wanted to get rid of that guy by setting him up with her sister.

[@cutienerdgirl]

Lesson of the Day: NEVER let your friends pressure you into going on a date with someone because "They seem nice!". Listen to your instincts! 🙏🏾

[@Lioness_Es]

There's a big difference between being a 'nice' guy and a good guy. The nice guys end up being the incels who flood comment boards with non sense rants and give creepy vibes. I only date good guys.

[@jeffbenton6183]

Once they start ranting they're no longer nice as far as I'm concerned, they only say that they're nice.

[@user-jd1cp1nk1p]

If he says "Go on a date with me, I'm a good guy" my alarm bells ring like crazy

[@gmotwmirl]

I feel you, its better to be a warrior in a garden, but how often do you see a third striker on tinder?

[@jasonhergert6081]

I prefer to call ourselves the genuines. We just simply live by the golden rule of treat everyone like how you want to be treated until proven otherwise.

[@Yusa_Beach]

@@jasonhergert6081 I mean look you kind of can't blame them, they justify their actions by what was done to them. Everyone does it.

[@TheeMusicalARM]

I accidentally agreed to a date....I thought he wanted to hang out as friends since I was good friends with his sister and of the family....I realized the misunderstanding when he laughed and said he had been super nervous. When a foot of snow canceled the initial plan, he wanted to walk...he was a 45 minute drive away (on freeway and highway). I was like, "You trying to die?" He had his friend and the friend's gf drive their van to "double date," arrived 3 hours early (despite me telling him I had had dental work done earlier and was going to be tired that day), the other couple went to see a different movie than us and then made comments about what "we would do at our wedding," left me alone in barnes & noble for 2 hours so he could go to a pampered chef meeting. The entire "date" took 7 hours and he decided to ask for a second date while we were in the back seat of his friend's van and the couple could hear us clearly. After I turned him down, he continued to call nightly. I asked him not to call after 9pm, so he would call At 9pm. My creepy Father liked him and invited him over, then left us alone. I sneezed and quickly excused myself so I could get a tissue from the bathroom. He followed me, even opening the bathroom door.

[@IncognitoSprax]

I'm praying that one of these isn't cringe. Just one. Just need ONE person to be the outlier.

[@Sushiphu]

you realize "nice guy" describes a specific type of person who is socially inept, but blames their faux pas on everyone else and not themselves? If your looking for stories about guys who are actually nice your in the wrong place. you might find some reformed nice guys though.

[@meloncaaat2050]

Trying to find things that aren’t cringe on a reddit about nice guy stories is like trying to find an eagle which isn’t a bird. “Nice guys” are always cringe (unless they stop being nice guys)

[@DemonAngelSakina]

Oh boy, do I have a story for everyone about this. (I have told it somewhere before, but it is a doozy). TL;DR: Guy I'd been friends w/ since high school tried to force me to date him cause I 'owed him'. Story: I'd known this guy since high school. We had a lot of the same friends so always hung around each other. Used to hang out at his house, or our group would always go to the mall, fair, out to eat, ect. In college, I started dating a guy whom I'd dated in high school and "friend" wasn't happy. After me and my ex-bf became exes again, "friend" tried to move in on me. I told him no. Then sh*t got worse. Went over to play video games/watch movies, "friend" says he wants to show me somethings and pulls up a site w/ hentai movies. I told him that was a crap joke--more so cause he was giving me a synopsis of each one (This particular incident happened more than once). Had a time where I was playing Saints Row 2 at his parents house, got a feeling something was off, and dude was jacking it on the couch behind me. I cussed him out, he "apologized". But it gets worse. I go through a bad time w/ my family (my father is a mentally abusive a-hole), "friend" turns it around that I 'need' to date him because I 'owe him' for him having to put up w/ my 'family crap'. He kept trying to force the issue until I relented and went on a single date with him, then he snapped at me when I refused a second date, that he could force me down and rape me and 'no one would care' because I 'deserved it' for leading him on. Finally cut ties w/ him and told his parents everything. (I know. Shoulda done all of that sooner.) Find out later, he was that way w/ every girl he knew, even trying to demand one girl--a (now-former) friend of mine from college--'take off her top' and show him her boobs to 'thank him' for him driving her home from college. There was also an issue where he bragged about rooming w/ a pair of lesbian girls that they were 'hot' and would 'let him join them in time'. They found out and kicked him out. Worst yet? Guy claims he got his certifications and all for bartending so I dread what could happen to any woman who he makes a drink for. Hopefully, if he tries anything, someone gets him arrested for being a garbage human.

[@MarthJakotsu]

I went out with a "nice guy"! I went out with him out of pity, he did the whole. "NoOne wNts to date meh! I'm oogly n girls dont find me attractive". It was not a date, but going out with friends. We went to watch Black Swan, i laughed out loud during the sex(?) Scene in the movie theater. Also bought my own ticket and food, i told him before we went out to see the movie, that it wasn't serious, which he agreed to this statement. He bought me a red rose that sat on his passenger seat, even tried to hold my hand during the movie. Went to panda express, bought my own food, because I don't like people lording shit over my head. I even invited him to my birthday to hang out with my friends, which some are also his friends. A week later when he asked me if I would consider dating him now and I told him honestly, that there was no interest to start with, i had been upfront and real about this going out thng. He wasn't my type and there was already someone else I had in mind. But! I guess im a user and lead him on from the start. I wish I had the old phone i was using that has the text messages. It was like an old nokia phone, or something. I remembered showing the people that asked if it was true, my best friend who is now my gf and life partner. (I love this woman❤.) Even stuck up for me, I've known her since mid-second year of highschool. We found out he dated a woman who has a lesbian chat room account. Nothing wrong with that, but i heard they had a rocky relationship. Idk if they're even still together. 😕

[@yogogames1821]

Was he short ?

[@whizkeysh0t]

@@yogogames1821 short tempered, sure!

[@SKOLAH]

I had a 'partner' who used sleep deprivation to coerce me into sex. I didn't want it. But I needed sleep. He was verbally, financially and emotionally abusive too. Another one would molest me in my sleep then deny it. I felt disgusting. He too was verbally, finanially and emotionally abusive. Another one was on top of my having sex with me while I was crying. I COULD go on. And on. But I won't. Nearly 10 years single and I don't think I'll ever change that, no matter how much I want to love a decent man. And I do want to. Very much. But the abuse risks are just too high. 😞💔 They all claimed to be 'nice guys'. A man keeps saying 'I'm a nice guy'? RUN. And do not look back. Truly nice men don't need to say it. It's obvious in their actions. Every 'nice guy' I've been in a relationship with turned out to be verbally, emotionally or/and sexually abusive. Hence I've chosen to be single for nearly 10 years. The males who say 'Women don't want nice guys' are usually saying women don't want THEM, because they're usually NOT that nice. And by saying that about women, you just KNOW they are not nice. Which makes women avoid them more, which they blame us for their failures without acknowledging how toxic they are.

[@minttulatte]

The guy I dumped last October was also a Nice Guy. We were luckily in a long distance relationship only but it was still pure hell. He was always comparing me to other women, usually blondes cuz he was into them, and demanded sexual things from me I found to be disgusting af. He also cheated on me with an ex on New Year's 2019 and said it was an ok thing to do 6 weeks afterwards and I was so angry at him for months cuz he didn't see how big of a deal it was. I was eventually so drained out because of all his bs (he was downright evil to me most of the time) that I needed to cut him from my life permanently so I did a week before Halloween because he had already ruined by birthday in September and I was pissed at him for it and didn't want him to ruin my Halloween too. He threatened to kill himself when I dumped him literally guilt tripped me into trying to be friends with him but I couldn't do it and blocked his ass on social media. He harassed me for a month through emails because I hadn't thought he'd try that but he did so I blocked his address. It was creepy af. I had to change my username/profile picture on facebook, twitter, instagram and youtube to make sure he won't find me again with a different account.

[@magicalwatermelon5147]

Wow that passed from Nice Guy Territory to straight up abusive. I hope you are doing all right now and are safe.

[@minttulatte]

@@magicalwatermelon5147 Yeah, it went fucking crazy af like within a year after I got together with him in early 2017. I realized how abusive he was only after I had ended the relationship. I'm doing better now that's not a part of my life anymore and am finding myself again, too. Luckily me and him live in different countries so there's no way he can suddenly pop up on my door step so I'm safe from all that crap now and forever. Just gonna enjoy my single life for a while. :)

[@magicalwatermelon5147]

@@minttulatte wow, so glad you got out of there

[@Axqu7227]

I called a safety check on a “nice guy” who was mopey and “suicidal” because I was dating someone else. The cops practically beating down his door at 3AM made him call me screaming about how I “overreacted” and “caused a scene.” I told him I’m totally fine with him hating me as long as he was safe. We’re no longer friends.

[@tidepodpadthai2633]

It's crazy how in these nice guy videos there's so many guys in these comments doing mental gymnastics to try and blame the girl Cognitive dissonance and just not being self aware at its finest.

[@tidepodpadthai2633]

@Daniel Rumbacher found the niceguy

[@Yusa_Beach]

I mean there's no one to really blame honestly.

[@christiaanjansevanvuuren9445]

Im a nice guy , and i understand that some woman are afraid of a 'nice guy' relationship becoming an abusive relationship

[@CEAsfg]

No matter if you are a male or a female, no matter if you are gay or straight or even bisexual, no one owes you any sexual favors just because they were nice to you. They’re nice to you because they are polite and respectful human beings, not because they want to have your babies. You’ll know if someone is interested in you if they tell you or if you ask. If you get rejected, don’t argue with it and move on with your life. That’s probably a sign that you need to work on yourself for a bit and stay positive.

[@Ya-oc2qz]

Gave the “nice guy” a go because I was pressured by coworkers even though he gave me weird vibes. Everything was good at first until I started picking up extra shifts at work- he thought I was seeing someone or was avoiding him even if I showed him proof I was at work. I got tired of being accused and told him to leave me alone. That’s when he began to stalk me and of course it’s easy for him to do so because he works at a sheriffs office...

[@nugget5009]

Unfortunately I can relate. I didn't even want to date him but he bought me expensive things and started calling me his girlfriend out of nowhere. Also had pressure from friends and ptsd from a past relationship so I didn't know how to say no. It was gross and I'm glad I ended up being able to end it but I had to block him on multiple forms of social media from multiple accounts. He was a misogynistic creep.

[@boogiebear3095]

What kind of sister guilts them like that?

[@ADMICKEY]

Probably many, especially in the medevil era

[@user-qx1om2wj1h]

The "nice girl" sister.

[@user-jd1cp1nk1p]

@@user-qx1om2wj1h A.k.a "pick me .... or pick my sister, so I can be friends with you without it being awkward and pretend that I am 'one of the boys'". I bet this guy was into her sister before and her sister just didn't wanna end the friendship. Instead she had the 'genius' idea to just set him up with her sister smh.

[@prosperity144]

In the first case, her sister was in wrong

[@shopece8807]

I mean there were no situations in this video where the guy was in the right but yeah the one with the sister trying to push the guy on her sister was pretty bad.

[@despinasgarden.4100]

@@shopece8807 the sister probably liked the guy and wanted use her sister to get closer to him.

[@ADMICKEY]

@@despinasgarden.4100 so some medevil type squiz eh?

[@hutao7917]

As a guy... I can’t comprehend how guys can act like this and still expect to get in someone’s pants. Why do guys do this.

[@damien678]

the answer is deadass just... A Fuckton Of Misogyny. im not even joking here

[@Yusa_Beach]

So it's all about getting into someones pants? Not advocating every guy whose claimed as a mice guy. But the people who are called those labels are the ones who have been constantly getting rejected, then trying to find a reason why they got rejected in the first place and then ending up somewhere you would most likely call them a creep for ending up that way the way they are. Having a distrust in women, or having a certain view about them which is mysgonistic, it really isn't their fault even if they do the things that they do. And I mean no one else really seems to care anyway since they "deserved" to be rejected even though we spout all the time that "everyone deserves happiness and lOve". (Hypocrites) it's also that people don't know the why they are like that to even see it from their view on why they do the things they do (Which happens to be you) We all know rejection is personal, even though we say we should be okay with being rejected. (Imagine getting rejected every single time, because of the reason of not looking "good" enough or not being "enough" even though you crossed mountains for them (figure of speech). Yet they only went with the dude or person that cared about them the least. And it isn't always about expecting, it's about wanting. The main difference between though what people call nice guys and bad boys are. Nice: people who place a lot of value on the one the they desire, but are unattractive, bitter with their rejected experiences (because they cared a lot), confused since it doesn't make since for someone to be with someone else if they didn't care for them, loneliness, regret, unresolved sexual needs. Mean while the bad boys: Attractive, don't place too much value on getting a partner, aren't really in it for love, but for comfort and pleasure, have massive egos because they're able to get things where most guys aren't (dates and sex). There's more to it and sometimes they can be interchanged depending on the person's experiences. But that's a reason why they are the way they are.

[@natayapenzellna]

I relate to some of these stories. I didn’t give that guy a chance tho even when everyone wanted me to 🙄🙄🙄🙄 still don’t regret it

[@amethysting3389]

Having use to being friends with one is draining enough I can't imagine dating one.

[@greilus4535]

I ALMOST dated a nice guy. Almost because I felt like something was wrong with him. Turned out I was right. Really dodged a bullet there and I’m really happy for it now.

[@amandaarlt4948]

Wow this video really made me realize that a past friendship/relationship I had was similar to this. For years I kinda guilted myself thinking it was my fault but I don’t think it was really and now I kinda feel better now that I know I’m not the only one who’s had this experience

[@ouiouid6985]

I dated a “nice guy” because I kinda liked him. I had almost every class w/ him, his # and all his social media’s yet he almost never talked to me and was an ass. Always stalled when I talked abt going on a date, would put me on the ceiling when we FaceTimed. I broke up with him after a month because my mental health was so bad and didn’t wanna drag him down w/ me. Did it in person and let him down as gently as I could and got death threats ❤️

[@12XxXHandlesAreStupidXxX123]

"That sounds like my boy" ok, so you need to learn to be a parent wtf. If I knew my kid was harassing women I wouldn't just giggle it off... what a terrible mom 🤦‍♂️

[@Aztesticals]

Sister dated a guy like this, he started sexually abusing her after awhile and she wouldn't leave him. I bought a bunch of primatine at walgreens, extracted out the ephedrine and nearly killed him by dosing his pre-workout with it. No regrets, now he has lifelong heart damage and vascular damage

[@xyzabc-nu3vd]

You did the right thing kudos. You're really amazing for not being too ignorant of such stuff! I hope she's doing fine now?💕

[@Aztesticals]

@@xyzabc-nu3vd He can't get hard anymore and she eventually left him because he wouldn't give up drugs and was lying to her. He wasn't on drugs intentionally and wasn't lying but she will never know

[@sherrycook4311]

He date raped me- convinced me my mom would believe him- (“she did”) over me I got pregnant, forced marriage. Finally got on my feet- I worked he didn’t. Divorced raised my child alone. Stressed relationships with my mom, & family. She blamed everything on me. And family was stuck in middle. 20 years later was told mom & ex- had hooked up. Very hurt but not really surprised. And all this is just a small part.

[@bee65]

Nearly anyone that asks you on a date/to be in a relationship right after a breakup (especially from a long-term relationship) is likely a selfish significant other. They value themselves and their happiness over respecting giving you the space and time you need to heal/process a breakup. Definitely not *always* the case, but there’s enough for it to be a decently large red flag.

[@princessmarlena1359]

He stalked me for over a year. I was wise enough to gather evidence, and I found out where he lived so I was able to serve him with a TRO.

[@shopece8807]

It was a nightmare of 3 yrs and didn't realize he was a "nice guy" until finally ending it for good.

[@smiley6080]

I kind of have a story to add. So my ex and I talked about 2 years before we go together. He kept asking me to send nudes and told me I was the one and so on. When I didn’t he told me I was a slut and all that. After 2 years we talked again and he told me he changed and broke up with his girl of 1 year and all that. We ended up dating for 2 years and he turned out to be a controlling, manipulating and abusive person. I am currently in therapy for ptsd after all the trauma he gave me.

[@stevenholt585]

You know what the difference between Reddit "nice guys" and real nice guys? If he compliments an attractive lady, received no feedback or thank you, and he immedietly calls that woman a derogatory term the second they are away from earshot. Real nice guys will just go on with their days.

[@Yusa_Beach]

No such thing as a real nice guy or "nice guy", people just lable people as good or bad for them based off of their own standards, interests, and actions that the other takes. You can't ever be sure of someone who is good or not, you either take the chance and have the risk of having a bad relationship or don't. It's that simple.

[@outstretchedwings]

Moral of this story: don't bully your friends into dating the weird guy who has a crush on you. Also, don't be friends with the Nice Guy

[@mordirit8727]

Wasn't gonna share but the post had none so I will: Bi here, and I managed to run into a gay nice guy, a nice gay if you will, which took me by quite the surprise. I had recently broken up with a girlfriend and was feeling very down so a friend of mine decided we would go partying and that I was supposed to "drink and have fun until you say otherwise". I honestly felt like saying "otherwise" right at the invitation but he was one of the very few friends I had left after the breakup so I went with him. He brought other friends to a night club. I'm not that much of a dancer but after a few shots of tequila even a damn rock thinks it can dance so I threw myself on the floor and I honestly started enjoying myself, dancing, singing, making out with random people who came close, it was fun. I hardly have any memories of this part but apparently Nice Gay was on the lineup of people I either threw myself at or didn't mind throwing themselves at me that night. When sunrise was near we left and the four of us jammed into a car, a girl from our college, my friend, me and the nice gay, though at that point he was still "a friend of my friend from highschool". We headed to the girl's house since she was the only one of us who had her own, and her apartment building had a pool and someone had said something about "foot in water" and drunk us instantly thought the best thing in the world right now would be to put our feet in the pool and chill by it. I was over the moon, having had the first legit fun night in around two months. We get to the pool, girl from college goes upstairs to get us all water (the kind without chlorine in it) and us 3 guys stay by the pool. Nice Gay starts making moves at me, asking about my life, my job, it's all going well until he blurts out that my friend had told me my ex had broken up with me and that I shouldn't feel sorry for losing such a cunt. I flat out tell him he had it wrong, because I had broken up with her, mainly because I felt I didn't love her anymore but still respected her and asked him not to refer to her like that. All of which is true, by the way. He gets a bit pissy but water arrives and we change the subject. I was a tad annoying with Nice Gay's comment so I mainly chatted with college girl; back then we were still on the 1 mandatory semester of Latin and I was one of 3 students who actually enjoyed the class, so I was trying my best teacher rhetoric to get her to understand the basics of declensions (prolly did a shit job given the tequilas, sorry). Friend is just texting his boyfriend on the phone and Nice Gay is doing something silent, nowadays I always imagine him staring at us with contempt. While later my body finally realizes I had taken in a lot of tequila, water and was standing nearby sounds of splashing water so obviously I had to pee. As I leave the pool's bathroom, Nice Gay is waiting for me. Accusing me of having lead him on, telling me I shouldn't go for college girl, that she was a cunt who would hurt me like my ex, telling me I was clearly gay and not bi and I should be with him instead. He then tries to kiss me. Not a great idea mate. I leave push him to his ass and just storm off. When I told college girl and friend what he had said and done, college girl takes lead and tells friend to call him and Nice Gay a cab, and invites me to stay overnight so I don't have to either go home, take a cab alone at a dangerous hour or leave with Nice Gay in tow. For the next few months he kept pestering my friend over having being mislead. The craziest part for me on his rants is how he always says I couldn't have kissed him like I did if I didn't love him, which I find crazy only because the best compliment a kiss from me has ever gotten is the backhanded compliment that it was "charmingly awkward". And no, in case you are reading this and realizing it is about you, me and college girl didn't get together that night. Or ever. She was just a nice and kind hearted friend, instead of a jackass trying to take advantage of someone who is drunk and depressed, you fuck. TL;DR: while depressed and crazy drunk I made out with a guy, after that he tried to convince me so hard I was gay that he put me off from dating guys for quite a long while.

[@im0ez]

fun fact: my dad is a nice guy ended up abusing my mom such a great space to grow up in! lol

[@ADMICKEY]

I'm supprised you exist and the mom not leaving the guy

[@im0ez]

​@@ADMICKEY My mom ended up divorcing him! My dad really likes me so he wasn't abusive to me other than when he occasionally manipulated me For me, the bad part was mostly living in a home where my parents fighting 24/7 was normal My mom also had anger issues because she was super young when she has me (there is a 10-year difference between her and my dad) so she wasn't ready for twins I still hold her accountable, I just know that she wasn't in the best situation.

[@ADMICKEY]

@@im0ez I see

[@ivettegutierreztorres4272]

I went on a date with a nice guy, as he put his arm around my shoulders, his hand next to my face, smelled like pee 🤢, now we're just friends

[@youneverseeanoldmaneatinga7416]

You can find better friends.

[@damien678]

surprised he took that ""friendzone"" tbh. these guys normally talk about it like its a living hell on earth 🙄 oh nooo i have a friend. woe is me. bonus irony points if they like mlp:fim

[@jadelynn1703]

I was forced into moving in with him and told he didnt want me paying rent. I told him that was silly so I paid rent. Then he kicked me out saying things were going too fast, after forcing me to get rid of my cat. It was stupid and I should have known to never date him after I had said no a bunch of times to a date.

[@damien678]

oh god, and him forcing you to get rid of ur cat too... im so sorry, thats horrendous

[@heatherrose9437]

What makes guys act like this? This is such a pervasive problem, it is just about everywhere. Where does this problem start in childhood and is there no way to start a more constructive way to deal with this social problem, without being labeled a feminist nazi.

[@Dinitroflurbenzol]

not being told way, just being ostracised

[@magicalwatermelon5147]

I think it comes from (for one thing) a repeated narrative in the media that if a girl says no, you have to keep trying. No one ever told them that “showing up at her house every day with gifts and asking her out until she says yes” is not romantic, it’s called stalking. And you know those scenes in shows and movies where a guy tries to make out with or initiate sex with a girl and she tries to push him away until she finally give in? Yeah, well that’s called sexual assault. I think these guys see these tropes in the media when they are too young to know that it isn’t an accurate portrayal of real life, so they imitate these behaviors when they are older, and are then surprised when girls reject them. They may think, “well I am doing what I am supposed to, because this is what the guys do on tv, so if the problem isn’t with me, it must be with girls”.

[@ForeverFornever37]

It was creepy asf basically wanted kids a home the whole nine yards with me on not even a first date we were just hanging out ugh

[@muymuy9578]

Wow. Has he left you alone now?

[@ForeverFornever37]

@@muymuy9578 oh yea most definitely i blocked everything and I wish a mf would try and stalk me they getting stabbed, shot, or idgaf I dont like that mess its fucked

[@muymuy9578]

@@ForeverFornever37 Great to hear you put that creep in their place

[@retromom6568]

Dated a nice guy, ended up pregnant at 17 by a almost 22 yr old, and a domestic violence survivor 😃

[@nicholassingh1476]

Exposed…

[@winter333]

I can’t even finish watching this bc I befriended a nice guy and he assaulted me multiple times, told everyone at our college we were dating and said gross things about me resulting in rumors, and he stalked me. Still is my stalker.

[@magicalwatermelon5147]

I’m so sorry. That’s awful. Please try to save as much evidence as possible of the stalking and tell other people in case you ever have to pursue legal action and try to avoid sharing your location on social media. I really hope you are doing alright and that it never escalates into more violence. No one should ever have to go through this shit. victimsofcrime.org/stalking-resource-center/

[@ivettegutierreztorres4272]

Hope you can get out of that

[@winter333]

@@magicalwatermelon5147 thank you I appreciate that, the police don’t care unfortunately. I’m okay with not getting justice I just want to be left alone at this point.

[@magicalwatermelon5147]

@@winter333 Of course they don’t 🙄 because why should we expect the police to DO THEIR JOBS. I hope that creep leaves you alone.

[@damien678]

for legal reasons im not seriously suggesting this, but, i mean, "home-aloning" him might do something? maybe also a dog, if that's within your means. im genuinely so sorry the police arent taking this seriously, its absolutely not ok

[@jungletheme2094]

yeah nice until you disagree with them or say the word "feminism" hahahahahaha

[@lilyoliver5520]

A bit silly but a lot of "nice guys" talk about how it's not fair the target of their affections sleeps with someone else and not them. Who do they know that sleeps with literally everyone in the world?

[@rogue5759]

I've had a couple of "nice guy" friends and my family always pressured me into dating them and I never did. I always had this gut feeling there was something wrong with them and I was always right. One of them used to smell his girlfriend sister's underwear, and the other one later on molested one of my best friends. ALWAYS listen to your intuition.

[@LaviPuppy]

Not so much of a nice guy moment, but when I was in secondary school a guy had a crush on me, and when he asked me out I told him I wasn't interested. I had been friendly, sure, but I hadn't thought I was leading him on or anything. And it turns out I wasn't, it was my friends who lead him on, telling him I was in love with him and was too shy to ask him out. Safe to say they weren't my friends after that. And the guy kept asking me out every year until I finally moved out of town. He then started dating girls who looked exactly like me. Then he somehow heard that my ex and I broke up and dumped his girlfriend, asking to go on a date with me, then complained at me when I said no and told me he had broken up with his girlfriend for me and that he deserved a chance. I have been telling him I am not interested in him for years. I have no idea how to get through to him unless I hit him with a sign that says 'no', and even then I don't think it'll work o.o

[@spicysalad3013]

11:12 this hit hard, almost the exact words a temporary online fling used when I refused to send him any more nudes. Fr I should've trusted my instincts when they said he was sus for going through like 6 "girlfriends" a year lmao

[@thine.]

"saying no is disrespectful" you don't owe anyone respect, it is earned and they clearly didn't earn it.

[@unocarb]

These nice guys seem to have stopped all emotional development at 13 years old. Impulsive, immature and worse of all "grown up"!

[@theycallmet3061]

Not exactly dating,but someone who I used to hang out with quite a lot. So I (17F at the time,about to turn 18. Now 22) So I was going to meet up with two of my friends for a cosplay con,I got dressed up as a Gijinka version of Kid Buu from DBZ,so I was wearing white harem pants,a matching crop top that was connected to a choker around my neck,his forearm and leg armor and a pink wig with pigtails. My two "Friends" were in the same cosplay group as me. Dragon Ball cosplay groups always have people with a big age gap,and that often leads to weird situations,like this one. Enter stage left,the cast of characters! Me: Me Lmao My crush = I'll call him G The nice guy in question = M So all three of us meet up at the con and we decide to walk around with me squished between them. I'm a very affectionate person so I was just happy to be able to hold both's hands. I had a thing for G since I first met him,but since he was way over 18 (26) I never confessed until years later. But I still wanted to spend time with him because y'know,I'll take what I can get! M on the other hand had a thing for me,not the "Clingy" type of thing,the "Kockoff Yuno Gasai" type of thing. He was a very weird guy,he gave some real "I'm totally not a child molester" vibes and was waaay to touchy feely with a 17yo girl,but I just ignored all the red flags because I just loooooved my friend so much. Ew. Let's compare the two: G was hyperactive,loud,extroverted and pretty much cared about his cosplay,but not about his dignity as he liked to run around and scream a lot. I'm apparently only romantically attracted to fucking idiots,but at least he was never creepy towards me unlike M. Also we both loved Dragon Ball to death so we'd just reenact random scenes,and do some sparring. A match made in the mental ward. Of course as DBZ fan dummies we hated shoujo anime,so our friendly interactions towards each other always ended up sounding like an exaggerated parody of the Tsundere trope. The "Fuck you!! It's not like I love spending time with you or anything!!" Thing. Word by word. Plus he was like a big brother to me,to the point of him threatening to throw hands with some people who bullied me in the past. They left me alone whenever he was there. M was the opposite. Introverted to the point of seeming almost antisocial,very narcissistic,and who absolutely hated loud social events,I'm pretty sure he attended cons just to have shirtless photos of him taken. He also had a few (A lot) of incel traits,but 17yo me just saw him as "OwO that's so cool!! Polar opposite of me!!" and nothing more. A friend. He also was very adamant on telling me *True* personal details when I asked. He changed his answers every time,to the point of me getting annoyed and trying to laugh it off by cooing an "Okay,Stranger!!" Everytime. After a few whiny "Strangeeeeer,Straaaaaaaaaaangeeeeeeeeer..." sounds coming from me he ended up confessing that G and him were the same age. "You're 18 right? I'm a bit older than you too,like G." So I was trying to spend time with both of them,but I was mostly focused on gawking at G,completely unaware of M's advances towards me. And M took that personally. How dare this teenage *FOID* not fall to his feet...Or absolutely not get the hint that he was hitting on her and not just being friendly. So G left for a few minutes to pick up some things from his car,leaving me and M alone beside each other. I was still looking like an enamoured schoolgirl. I let my tongue slip and said "You know M,I've had a crush on G since the first day I met him. I'm head over heels. If only I was 5 years older. But heh,at least I told someone." Suddenly I felt like my lower waist (That part between the waist and the hip) was being squeezed. I jumped back and realized that M was the one who has squeezed me. Me: "Why did you do that?" M: "Do what? I was just hugging you. Are you ticklish?" Me: "Don't squeeze me out of nowhere,it's weird." M: "Are you upset?" Me: "Well yeah,my mom is here,I don't think she'd like seeing you squeeze my hips like this." M: "Gotcha!" I looked down and saw some faint scratches on me where he had placed his hand. Very faint,but they were definitely there. Me: "Did you just scratch me?" M: "Did I do something wrong?" Me: "You left scratches on me." M: "Oh! My bad!! I Didn't mean to!!" Me: "Oookay...Leave my hips alone." So we waited until G returned,and spent the rest of the day taking pictures with the other cosplayers,going at the con concert and eating Asian snacks. G pointed out the scratches and said "Did you get into a fight with a cat or something?" To which M replied "It was me,she's so pale I did that with a simple hug." My mom didn't notice the scratches on me as thet were very faint but I just chalked it up at M's extremely awkward *ThatGuy* -ism showing as usual and forgot about it. So a few days later I asked my mom what did scratching a girl's waist or hips meant. She explained to me that it was some sort of sexual gesture used to mark your partners,kinda like "The hickeys you see on people at your school all the time,but on your hips." (Thanks mom LoL) and I spent the whole week with "EW GROSS!!" As my default mood. The scratches were already gone though. Good riddance. Did you think the creepy fucking shit was over? No Sir! I later found out that M was "A little bit older than me" alright. If that "Little Bit" meant a 22 year age gap. Since there was no visible proof of him doing that my first impulse was the immense desire to kick him in the dick ten times...And then my second impulse was rushing over to the bathroom and taking an hour long shower. TLDR: Creepy 40yo incel tries to call Dibs on 17yo me by trying to "mark" me by squeezing my sides like a socially awkward high school student over his own jealousy fit.

[@Phoebe5448]

Oh god this legit sounds like my parent's relationship. Good job I'm ace! LOL 😆

[@kurapikakurta1997]

Ace gang ✨

[@jungletheme2094]

lol ofcourse there is one " im not a girl but I'm the nice guy " lol

[@PoptartParasol]

I always question those stories. It's possible that they seriously downplay how bad they were

[@repentorperish1386]

@@PoptartParasol atleast they admit it though. I use to tell girls i try to be a nice guy, but im also kind of a dick. Not mean just i dont like beating around the bush and i tell the truth way too much according to some people. Then again im being tested for autism as an adult so that kinda makes sense now lol

[@lv3223]

@@repentorperish1386 Same dude. I’m not saying I’m a nice guy, but I always question if I am and try to be better. People tend to call me a nice guy, but if I don’t have the energy to be their punching bag then I’m a dick. I got the diagnosis of a high functioning autistic too. But I really don’t know how I’m supposed to be anymore. It’s often a lose lose situation with me.

[@repentorperish1386]

@@lv3223 how has your diagnosis been? Are you getting amy therapy or anything?

[@lv3223]

@@repentorperish1386 It made certain things clearer, but I wouldn’t say it’s been easier. I talk to a psychologist. It’s given me a word for how I think and an understanding of scenarios where I don’t quite understand people. But the fact I’m high functioning makes it hard for people to understand me. You can’t tell by looking at me, but I get extremely tired of trying to understand social cues and just generally being around people. I’ve been getting better at understanding people, but it gets very exhausting. Most people don’t tell you how they feel and you have to figure it out yourself. I’ve learned that people can’t always handle honesty or directness, so I try to be as honest as I can while also restrict it to not be taken offensive. Sometimes people don’t want honesty even when they ask for it, they want compliments and reassurance. I do get some helpful advice, but most of the time you have consider others and not yourself. You have to ask people general questions even if you don’t really want too or need too know. It’s a society thing that you have to ask general question to be polite. Telling people about your diagnosis can help, but a lot of people also doesn’t quite know what being autistic means. Which can make a lot of people ignorant and/or oblivious to scenarios which are hard for you.

[@mercedesmarie2162]

I dated , had 2 babies with and married a “nice guy” and I found out the hard way that he cheated on me with my baby sister and several other women 🤡 all while treating me like garbage 🗑 Ladies please learn from my mistakes

[@sweetriver9063]

He trapped me with guilt for 4 years. Cheated on me, tried to blame it on his cousins and grandmas death... good riddance

[@yazzytime5632]

this has happened a couple times but one of the worse times was this dude lets call him L. L was a nice kid we were in 8th grade together and i knew he had a couple issues but so did i and im like yea whatever hes a ncie kid. Then this dude said he liked me and i was at first like no i dont really like you like that bc i just broke up w/ my ex a couple weeks prior and had a lot of shit going on. He kept looking so sad, barely talking to me saying how bad he felt and i felt guilty so i said yea sure we can date. at first it was fine but then it became me bending over backwards to make sure he was ok. He was a compulsive liar, threw a tantrum if something small didn't go his way, was controlling, toxic, blamed everything that went wrong in his life on me, saying i wasn't doing enough and anytime i tried to talk abt any of my issues he would make it into me taking care of him and how he felt. he was emotionally abusive and used my fear of him killing myself if i left him as a way to keep me w/ him. At the time of us dating in middle school i was severely depressed, getting sexually harassed, bullied as well as cyber bullied, dealing with very strict toxic parents, struggling w/ going to a new school soon, extreme anxiety, and suicidal thoughts. Then when we went to highschool it just go worse he kept pushing and using what "happened" to him as justification for his emotionally abusive actions towards me. He tried to kill himself because i didnt text him enough while i was in school and was unhappy w/ the relationship. he texted me and all of our friends from middle school while we were all in different high schools. After that i think a week later i fell asleep on the train from being dead tired from him my emotions and he was yelling at me over text and i finally broke it off. Then i found out later from his mom that all the stuff he said happened to him happened to his brother. i wasted 8 months with him ugh

[@evoLTenshi]

I once chatted with this guy who told me how his ex-wife had emotionally and psychologically abused him. How now he tried to make a better life for him and his son. We talked about how he's dated since, and how he's been disappointed by other women. The one time he showed up at his long distance gf's home, right after they broke up, unannounced. Clearly this was a "nice guy". After I called him out on it, he lost his sh#!, telling me that I didn't understand his motives and true self. Then a year later, he sends me an email despite we stopped talking. He still recalls my accusation apparently, and said "I shouldn't mess with a pisces." A long rant on the subject of my cold heart, and how he reproaches me. 🤣🤣🤣 I didn't replied. That would be messing with crazy.

[@TheArtisanTarotTBMoon]

As a person who dated a nice guy and settled into a long relationship that ended up just holding me back…. If your going to date a nice guy just make sure you don’t settle because of anyone else’s reasons other than your own. When your truly ready to end it then end it.