Dave Gorman's Modern Life is Goodish - Series 5, Episode 5 | Full Episode

[@lefrinj]

My impression of Dave is summed up in the early email 'I know he might be tempted to do it anyway'... sounds about right!

[@GneasYTC]

That BOING! at 30:20 (ish) caught Dave totally off guard. I'd bet good money that Mr Timpani did not do that in rehearsal! 🤣 This is definitely one of the best MLIG episodes. A masterclass in constructing comedy.

[@KatyLawson]

I think this is my favourite MLiG episode of the lot just for how he links back together everything. Explaining how he made the lawyers happy in the first half, explaining how he made the accountants happy in the second, and combining together strip clubs & human statues to pay for the cost of a taxi & mannequin for the Edmonds portion is just hilarious. I adore this episode. Also one of the best Found Poems of the entire series.

[@Abdullah-london]

@Ross Bourne haha!

[@andybarry5315]

Brilliant episode, everything was on point.

[@honkynel]

Totally agree. He did a great job of tying all the loose ends together. I reckon he might have bought the taxi and mannequinne (is that spelling right?) first and then went another way with it. Whatever, it's still one of the best I've seen.

[@petebyrdie4799]

Funniest found poem of the series.

[@minifluffk]

BONG

[@phelineS]

@@minifluffk CHIME?

[@joskimengstrom2853]

@@phelineS BOING?

[@t.c.6920]

Who else really wants to know what the “wall of eggs” is or was

[@eatmywords]

it was probably just a bad yolk

[@burrytellam]

@Ross Bourne Nothing to do with the double-yolk-ers?

[@joe-jones]

I believe he wanted to put up an egg-shellf

[@TheIndulged1]

It's actually funnier not knowing trust me I'm a gynecologist

[@serhii_himself_98]

The whole point of the joke is that it sounds intriguing. If we knew what it was, it wouldn't be funny

[@rewrose2838]

This was my favourite of the bunch! I will now think better of Dave's stories about cab driving

[@martinmaguire-music6692]

When I was a pretentious third year philosophy student, I went to a strip club, didn't order a drink, and wrote a poem. But one of the strippers feigned interest in the poem so I was flattered enough to pay for a £30 dance.

[@SeventhEve]

I hope you learned a very important lesson that day: just because they take their clothes off for a living doesn't mean they're idiots. She had your number.

[@JonnyMack33]

@martinmaguire-music6692 .. hopefully the -strippers- _exotic dancers_ learned that not 100% of patrons to Gentleman's Clubs, are lecherous, vapid, creepy, weird sad bastards either..... only 99.99999r

[@PantheonLincoln]

I still want to know about the wall of eggs.

[@TheHoldenmcgroin]

We ALL want to know about the Eggs... ;)

[@cellardwellersdiscos]

Dave , that had to be one of your best ever episodes!

[@piranhapianoschannel8840]

Cheers for putting these here!

[@brandonmartin-moore5302]

I was in the audience for a run through if this, very good.

[@RFC-3514]

8:05 - This is peak Gorman. If ever a standing ovation was justified...

[@klaythoring1326]

I’ve only just come across this content & I can’t believe I didn’t know it existed 😆 This kind of mischief is right up my alley! Thanks from 🇨🇦

[@JonnyMack33]

It's only a snippet at the start but to the people I was in jury duty with in 2017... I FKN TOLD YOU THAT ANPR CAMERAS ONLY SEE THE PLATE AND NOT THE ENTIRE CAR LET ALONE WHO MIGHT BE SAT IN IT AT ANY GIVEN TIME!! 🤬🤬..... **SIGHH** ...... thank you for that Dave.

[@1969Kismet]

The found poem was a real belter!

[@bujin1977]

"Imagine cheerfully wishing deafness on a person because you don't want to hurt the feelings of a clock!" Welcome to 2020.

[@monomakes]

So good! The Found Poem this episode is great! Starts out strong :)

[@lukeriely4468]

I loved when this was on TV via Dave. Dave was a top channel back then. At least in the age of streaming, i can still watch them ❤

[@OneEyedMonkey9000]

I'd missed all of these shows the first time around. Thanks for posting these on KZbin.

[@DarkOmega150]

I was just looking for this episode last night. One of my favourites!

[@martybartfast1]

Amazing. Made me smile after a hard week.

[@WukongTheMonkeyKing]

Probably my favorite Found Poem to date.

[@aihtdikh]

That was a magnificent found poem.

[@Turtletovey]

This episode is truly wonderful

[@YtheTie]

He actually didn't explain the 'Wall of Eggs'. Drives me crazy!

[@mr.skeleton7780]

The foumd poem made me laugh so mush that i cried

[@skorpio999]

Dave Gorman you are a legend hahaha

[@marlonius05]

Sorry, I know you can't say, but things like this get in my head, I run away with things.. what the hell is the wall of eggs!!

[@noka79]

This is one of the funniest found poems

[@sebastiansimon7557]

12:23 - Did the lawyers prevent this from being “Lubed hole”?

[@kezkai]

I've seen many human statues that were actually just plain old statues. I don't know if I'm thick or if they're genius but it's definitely hard to tell the difference..

[@frozenjune83]

aww. The poor girl and dad must have been dead worried about the wellbeing of the actor.

[@black_platypus]

Thank you very much, Dave! :)

[@LeeAnneGuerin]

How is this series 5 and I've only just discovered it?? At least I've found it now 🇦🇺😊

[@willlister9825]

I miss MLIG!!! Dave Gorman is a genius!

[@Diggnuts]

Not using a self-service check out for me is about one thing. If I have to do more work for the same amount of stuff to buy, I want a discount.

[@casanovafunkenstein5090]

Just run everything through as potatoes and make sure the scanner never sees the bar codes 😉

[@berniebasset9465]

It's quicker than waiting for a person... May be more work but less time spent in a supermarket is good.

[@thechannelofultimatedestiny]

I worked in customer service so I want to be paid if I have to talk to a person.

[@abelovedsonofGodinwhomHeis35-6]

Good show, clever working up to it.

[@NewyJimmy]

We need more shows!!!

[@Plons0Nard]

22:27 That is dark 😎 but solid 👍🤝🇳🇱

[@JamesSmith-pp5vp]

I dropped a like for "unexpected item in the bragging area.'

[@KrisAdamsTV]

The only issue I have with Dave uploading these for us is that I always give it an automatic thumbs up (I trust Dave) as it starts... But by the end of the episode, I am disappointed I can't give it another thumbs up.

[@EleanorPeterson]

Kris, you're a total hero! :-) How about this: give it a Thumbs Down... then tap the button again and take away the Thumbs Down. Ooh, that feels so satisfying. It's like cleaning an injustice from the sticky face of the world with the moistened wipe of righteous approval. Or something.

[@KrisAdamsTV]

@@EleanorPeterson You think outside of the box, and I like that 😂

[@jamesdean6660]

That family who watched the statue for hours, that was just the Dad playing around with the kids. Cheap half hour! Mom couldn't be arsed with it.

[@notsonominal]

The fake mannequin at the end, priceless!

[@benjamin-jp93]

Did anyone else look at the thumbnail with Gormhub and the cab and thought some fake taxi shit was going on?

[@ImplodedAtom]

That little girl probably left feeling bewildered and not a little upset.

[@Alphoric]

I’m pretty sure there’s a London taxi test where you have to learn pretty much the whole of London

[@keithpanton7486]

"The Knowledge" - yes, you're tested, and have to essentially tell the examiner the entire route from one landmark to another, with road names, the lefts and rights, and other info. Which is why taxis maybe are more expensive than minicabs running off google maps. But, if you're pretending to be a taxi, you don't have to :)

[@wheedler]

I'm impressed that the unter-uber joke got that big a laugh, assuming it wasn't edited.

[@gemmascotland899]

Just realised last week that self service checkouts are the worst! Was shopping with my gran and she decides to wait at what looked like a very long queue for a real till. I saw the self service was fairly empty. So i said "ill meet you at the car" and went to the self service, thinking id be quicker. I wasn't! She'd already been served and had sauntered past me laughing before the woman in front of me was done with her shopping. Then, as i was buying a bottle of wine, it took me a few minutes to get the attention of the ONE person managing all 8 self service tills! My gran was waiting for me for nearly 10 minutes! 😂😂😂😂

[@ItzNotMe]

Until you go to a till with an old woman who does everything at x0.25 speed, and wish you chose self service

[@Lord_Skeptic]

41:28 that reminds me of hot fuzz

[@Widdekuu91]

I hope the club pays the girls in advance though. Imagine standing there all evening, in your underwear and the only 4 visitors just stare and leave.

[@bobpieczarka4357]

Anyone else take a hit everytime he says "BONG"‽

[@Albrett]

The amount of porny bot accounts in this comment section is worrying..

[@deadalive3288]

Loving how one of them is a Doctor, I wander what they got their doctorate in?

[@Albrett]

@@deadalive3288 it is quite funny to see some of the videos on some of the linked accounts though 😂

[@yourleftnostril835]

That could make for an interesting episode

[@jamesgenn3694]

Would be good for a found poem though ;)

[@gubjorggisladottir3525]

I have been twice to London. Took a cap (TAXI) to the airport when leaving (both times). They both used a Sat. nav.

[@watfordjc]

I imagine its because sat navs are more advanced than they used to be. In the old days they just did directions and some of them couldn't recalculate a route ("do a U-turn"). Now some of them can do live traffic conditions, accidents, road closures, fast route re-calculations, journey time estimates, postcodes, house numbers... I'm not a cabbie but I have a large chunk of England downloaded for offline use in both Google Maps and osmand+ on my phone, which covers a much larger area than The Knowledge does, so a sat nav isn't much of a surprise given 67% of London's airports aren't even in London. Taxi drivers only have to agree to journeys in a certain radius, but if you hail enough cabbies you'll probably find one willing to drive to Glasgow or Paris. This taxi driver said in 2009 "We need all 3: Internet, sat nav, and The Knowledge." kzbin.info/www/bejne/Y3-2iH-lqb2fibc

[@cubworx7397]

Was it a traditional 'black' cab though?

[@juliepoppy1021]

You will never know about the wall of eggs.🤣🤣

[@KeithWWatson]

Maby the bots are the clubs trying to get there own back lol

[@hedgehog1965uk]

I think the clubs might have stopped paying cabbies because of that stunt, so it is the cabbies that are pissed off.

[@garrett2439]

@@hedgehog1965uk Talk about kicking an industry when it is down sheesh

[@scragar]

"Maby" is a girl's name, "maybe" is positing a possibility. "There" is indicating a location, "their" is about ownership. I get you're an idiot, but it doesn't take much effort to type things correctly, if you're unsure just look up the words to confirm.

[@sachimourya1431]

The bouncers watching his show 👁👄👁

[@horarywheat8028]

Wünderbare What a legend!

[@ElectriKong-]

BONG!

[@confusedwhale]

Was the strip club thing the reason why the show isn't on the air anymore? Because that was amazing and scary at the same time.

[@ElectriKong-]

The show isn't on air anymore because it was labour intensive for Dave Gorman.

[@DavieCalifornia]

@@ElectriKong- thanks for clarifying it was labour intensive for Dave the Gorman, not Dave the Channel :)

[@RickRubinesque]

I felt really bad for the little kid and the dad. That was cold blooded, Dave.

[@DoctorWhoIsBeast]

The mannequin only did as well as it did because of the expectation that it was a human statue. This likely wouldn't work on a larger and longer scale

[@gorkemgulan]

Yeeeeeeey a day early

[@subinmdr]

WHAT IS THE WALL OF EGGS?

[@patrickhannon4217]

I don't know if this'll ever get seen, was there a reason Dave occasionally mispronounced the odd word here and there? I noticed it a few times, I'm just wandering if it was an in-joke I'm missing

[@notme222]

I'm not sure which you mean. Dave sometimes does it as a reference to a different joke in the show, but you'd have spotted that. What I see him to consistently is change acronyms to something sillier less offensive. (Thus getting a laugh and avoiding censorship issues.)

[@patrickhannon4217]

@@notme222 To be honest mate, 6 months ago I made the comment, I don't know what I meant either 😅🤣

[@cannygrowabeard]

8:07, an incredibly well crafted joke

[@shifttheshaman]

Damn. Dave is so elegant.

[@TheNerdestOfOne]

29:44

[@LunaC...]

Is Eric named after Morecambe?

[@JonnyMack33]

She laughed because you said 'per head'... not "pony"

[@loodlebop]

I bet the sales of black cabs shot up after this

[@leonlaird_]

It's mind numbing hearing people complain about people being out of a job due to automation such as with the self-service checkout and not levying that critique against capitalism which necessitates meaningless work.

[@Ashs-mini-vlogs]

So funny 😂😂😆😂😂

[@BenjaminConway]

Brilliant.

[@ATubeWithMeInIt]

BOING?

[@HunterKiss]

Here in the Netherlands the self-checkouts work fine. At least in my experience. No hassle with elderly customers that cannot find their pin card, remember the code or pay with loose change. No waiting on the customer in front of you that is having a shitty conversation with the checkout person. Noone raping you from behind with the shopping cart etc.

[@LoneKharnivore]

11:00 No, dude, cos the customer then buys overpriced drinks and lap/private dances.

[@myoysteristhisworld728]

35min

[@chrisis1993]

BONG

[@chrism4841]

Shouldn't take a lot of work to get the statue pretending to be a man pretending to be a statue to actually start acting like a robot (sometimes). You could make an army of them for pretty cheap (few servo pulleys and a microcontroller) and drop them off around big tourist locations each day. You might have just ruined the human statue industry.

[@tytoalba605]

Gotta say I'm more observant but I would love to meet human statues

[@TheHutchy01]

I think we can safely say, Dave hasn't managed to go anywhere in a cab he didn't own since this.

[@joshuaprescott2930]

Legit thought this was a fake taxi video on KZbin

[@chrisb9345]

You did not include the insurance for the taxi, or fuel. So you are ignoring costs just like Bargain Hunt does, Ackshually.

[@Apudurangdinya]

dear editors, when we watch some stand up or performance we didn't really stand up and look at the audience for some reaction

[@Apudurangdinya]

@alphadawn2015 lennon they do some cutaway to audience from time to time, but i just learned they no longer produce the show so it was useless to poimt out i guess

[@davimurph]

You can also use cutaways to cover edits if, for example, the show needs to be cut for time or to hide a flubbed line.

[@noka79]

Jesus wept

[@chrisskully1228]

Lettice is crunchy until it wilts

[@ezekielthrockmorton7700]

context?

[@chrisskully1228]

@@ezekielthrockmorton7700 Just stating facts

[@shymike]

What's lettice?

[@michaelkelly8226]

P

[@myoysteristhisworld728]

john did the least

[@snooksy1982]

Is this guy a comedian?

[@shymike]

Nothing gets past you

[@danielch6662]

Dave, are you pregnant? ;-)

[@ThatCoalSoul]

10th.

[@mikemcdonald8952]

14th :)

[@myoysteristhisworld728]

669 likes

[@michaelbrules]

s

[@theknile]

Is this what a good TED talk would be if it was actually really shit?

[@thumbsdownbandit]

Thumbsdown thumbsed down first again.

[@nealjroberts4050]

You forgot to self thumbsdown again. Slacking!

[@KeithWWatson]

Bravo, what a amazing achievement

[@Ooffoop]

He’s back

[@hedgehog1965uk]

I missed you x

[@NekoAiray]

I use the self-service checkout because it limits human interaction and makes me more at ease.

[@RichardWatt]

Although it becomes a pain in the arse if you want to buy aspirins, flu remedies or booze as those are age restricted. Oh, and also DVDs.

[@jayl9110]

@@zigzagtoes You mad, fascinating, mad human being. I would love to see a biopic of your misanthropic adventures.

[@helenwood8482]

That's why I do it too and I work in a shop!

[@rebmcr]

30:23

[@mikewalker4513]

BONG