Divorce Update / Answering Your Questions

As most of you know, me and my wife have decided to get divorced. We've been sharing our love story with you from the beginning, so a lot of you had questions about what we are going through. In today's video I will answer some of your questions and give you an update about the divorce and this new phase in our lives. Thank you again for all your love and support.
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🩷Have a lovely day!!! And thank you so much for your love and support! 😊

[@emma.mcnairy]

I've been through this. I have to say, that you will find being friends is not helpful, at least not for a while. The more distance, the better you will be able to see the situation even more clearly. Think about what kind of people you want in your life for friendship.

[@hotline_gaia]

this!

[@usmc_sunscreenqueen]

Ex's are ex's for a reason.

[@YTDBD00]

@@usmc_sunscreenqueenyet ex’s can still be friends

[@SukieDevereux]

​@@usmc_sunscreenqueen if it's about cheating, friendship is suitable .. so not always 😊

[@KatsuyuhTV]

me and the father of my daugther became friends only years after our break ups... so take distance is the best

[@minacoda]

i left a comment in your tiktok video recently where i told you i've been watching you for the past 9 years, you liking it made my whole day

[@brittanyware3217]

I hope u the best in ur life Julia

[@bernadettemader9147]

The truth is that love is not always enough. There are toxic issues that love cannot fix. It's the best thing for you. Once you come to the otherside a little you are going to feel so much healthier. I am not trashing her at all. It is just the way it is.

[@lizzi7128]

100% 100%

[@brendaleelydon-carpenter1554]

Realizing love was not enough was the hardest thing for me. I love my ex to this day & miss their family (been divorced over 15 years now), but it just wasn't working & we couldn't do the work to fix it. 😢

[@guppyriella]

I personally think this was for the best. You got this Julia ❤

[@pinkpotatowarrior]

I wouldn't be hard on yourself for being in limbo for so long. When you're in an abusive relationship for so long, especially an emotionally and financially abusive one, it's hard to really see how bad the situation is when you're the one in the situation. It's so hard to leave

[@MiyaviTheKing]

Was it abusive?😢

[@pinkpotatowarrior]

​@@MiyaviTheKingyes

[@xxcookiemonster4xx895]

​@@MiyaviTheKing no it wasnt

[@missycitty9478]

​​@@xxcookiemonster4xx895Yes. It was. Sadly. Eileen even admitted so. She owned up to being abusive.

[@nonbinaryvoid]

You already look like you have more hope and light in your eyes and body language compared to the previous divorce announcement video. Im happy for you.

[@kendrapennington8057]

When you guys got married, I was going through my divorce. It was really hard, but I’m happier now. Things will get better. Life is too short to have doubts. You know what you’re doing, and I believe in you.

[@brittanychase9885]

I’m so happy for you Julia. You can walk away from this chapter in your life knowing that you gave this relationship your all. It’s time to move on with your life and embrace the future. ❤🎉

[@user-zy4kb7uc7w]

Julia I'm so pleased you've made this move. It's been clear for so long that you could never thrive in that marriage, and as you have said, it has nothing to do with age gaps, and everything to do with behaviour. Although you're in a lot of pain the relief is plain to see. You knew what you needed to do, but it takes great strength to do it. Deep down you knew your worth and you have made the first steps. You're brave and strong, and I'm so proud of you. You deserved better, and your life will go from strength to strength in time. Well done xx

[@Unfilteredmummymakeup]

Sending lots of love darling. So sorry to see you go through heart break and upset. Thinking of u and hope u can be happy real soon ❤

[@mellel5594]

You uploaded this right when I started watching your previous videos explaining some of what has been happening in your marriage. You are a beautiful person. We all have flaws, but honestly, you deserve someone who will truly cherish you and properly respect you. ✌🏾

[@sarahcox215]

Do what’s right for you Julia❤

[@hhlentz]

My husband of ten years unexpectedly left me and our toddler son six weeks ago. I have not done well. Really, that’s an understatement. I cry all the time. And having to see him or speak to him is unbearably painful. Obviously, it’s a different situation from yours but it’s admirable that you both do still care for one another. I hope it’s not too difficult seeing Eileen. Also, I live right outside Atlanta. You’re welcome to contact me if you have questions or need advice about where to stay, eat, etc. 🙂

[@Swiss_Girl]

So sad!! Check out Adrienne Everheart. She is an angel and all about female energy☀️🙏🏻🥰

[@RoughStoneRollingLapidary]

I'm at 2 years and am still in the same spot as you. It hasn't gotten easier. I hope it isn't the same for you.

[@teijaflink2226]

I hope he at least tells why (such a coward thing to just leave without saying anything) or that he comes back (perhaps he's going through a mental health issues). But you just don't abandon a child, you can divorce a partner but not your own child, so I really hope he comes back at least to be part in his sons life even if he feels your relationship is over.

[@andjela7847]

i hope you and your wonderful kiddo heal as fast as possible, if no one has told you this today - i love you and you're doing amazing :)

[@katcabana-ih7rd]

Someone who also battles and struggles with depression has faced a similar situation. My ex was married to a guy, and they had an open marriage. I was with them but fell for him, and they ended up separated and I stayed with him. Alot of it after I realized was more like an emotional codependency because I was young and vulnerable and he felt safe to me. We tried to be together for a few years but things got toxic and stressful. At first when we broke up I felt myself slip into psychosis because we had known each other and seen each other for 8 years, but unmedicated I get myself back up in life, started working a job again started to see other people. Life moves on and goes on to what's genuinely your purpose and you learn lessons from people. Take things always has a blessing and never for resentment or hate. Things happen for a reason. And you are not alone!❤ your young and beautiful with a very caring heart. You'll be okay.

[@talizorah6072]

The polyamourous period was more than just a ditch effort. It helped you discover something new about yourself. That is a beautiful thing and should be looked at as something gained.

[@sydney02403]

Every video of yours feels like talking to an old friend. Hope you feel the same❤

[@tristatowles3405]

Im happy for you, i think you are truly becoming free

[@mshmt2001]

Julia, I’m sending you lots of love during this time! Please continue to take care of yourself and keep seeing that light ❤

[@kiranightlee7291]

I applaud you for being so open, honest and vulnerable in this...not that you owe your audience anything, but I think people resonate so much more with the raw kind of authenticity here than the very much curated "day in my fabulous life" videos.

[@Tm___]

Best wishes in your fresh start! You can do it ❤

[@Meganking95xo]

Oh Julia baby everything’s gunna be ok 🤗 you’re gunna get through this and we’re all here to help support you through it. We love you 💗💗💗

[@0BV1AOLIV1A]

Ily julia, im so sorry that your going through this but its for the best. I wish you all the best in life xx❤

[@jessicahainsworth7994]

Ive supported you for years and will continue to do so as a loyal subscriber- i have always valued and appreciated your transparency , if you ever need anything from us like more support, kinder comments please let us know- thank you for sharing this with us xx

[@MakenzieHallie]

Just want you to be happy Julia! 🖤🖤❤❤ I think space and a chance to be separate and really reflect on what's happened is important, before a friendship is attempted. But you know your heart and relationship with her best. Keep following your heart.

[@rachelkirkland7889]

Julia I have been a fan of you for so long and I have always loved and supported you and always will. Your happiness is all that matters. You are so beautiful on the inside and out!💞

[@Jennaonthemilkcarton]

I’m glad you’re making a decision that benefits your future. Completely

[@Kittenlover222]

Thank you for sharing Julia. Wishing you peace ❤️

[@stephe93anie]

You got this Julia! I’m loving seeing your adventures in TN (I grew up in Nashville) as always, thank you for opening up and sharing with us 💓

[@zoooejenkins]

I’m glad you are finally free. A lot of people stay in relationships because they’re afraid to be alone. But unlike them, you have a great deal of strength and self-respect. Deep down, you know that you did the best you could. You went above and beyond to make this marriage the best it could be. But you’re wise enough to know that you deserve better. And now you’re creating the space to receive it. I’m proud of you girl.

[@alejandramarquez6804]

May I ask how old are you?

[@trailmixer-ix3wn]

Life is a journey. Some people are meant to be in your life for a season. Others are a lesson. Some may even be a soulmate. Not every moment of life will be perfect, but never give up. We are all perfectly imperfect ❤. You never know what life will bring you next but I hope it is wonderful.

[@AboutSomethingYou]

Sweetheart…you can‘t just switch to being friends or even family.❌ That’s just not going to work out. You need to say goodbye - you need to. If you don‘t, the burden and the unhealthy interactions will still linger. Maybe disguised and with a new „face“, but they will come back like zombies. Existing after death. Think about the „co-parenting“ the pets. Think again. This might be necessary with kids, but not with pets. Neither dogs nor cats cope easily with changing home every week or so. It‘s simply not good for them, and we’ll egoistic. One of you should keep the pets. No one benefits from a „co-pet keeping“ situation. Let go of each other, wish each other well, and move on.

[@nicanonymus2491]

I think you’re right, especially with the co parenting. It will come naturally, Julia is often in the US and Brazil. IMHO it’s better the pets stay with her wife. 🤷🏻‍♀️

[@f.sense888]

You don't need to give people explanations, your own personal feelings are yours and yours only! I love a man who is 68, 21 years older than me. We have the most beautiful, intense, precious connection, he's my Soul mate...but...love is not enough, seems an excuse I know, but it's true. We are in separation. I believe in destiny, so, maybe will be together one day, before ending...💗 meanwhile I live my life doing the best I can , in Gratitude. Stay strong ♾

[@JloveLatina]

Yeess Julia never have to worry about being in debt, her taking credit cards left and right

[@jacliveshere]

That makes a lot of sense that your mental health improved so you felt more equipped to make changes and not fall apart. I've dealt with a lot of mental health struggles too. Thanks for sharing all that. We're happy you're doing better Julia. You'll get through this!! 💖💙💖

[@awesomeadamfrom2099]

Sorry to hear about Julia I m here for you

[@gabrielaarwen6476]

We love you Julia, ❤and want you happy

[@judithmoore1545]

From my personal perspective I don’t think it’s possible to take some time to figure out who/where you are when that involved no time alone with yourself. Already being in a relationship with another person; traveling to the States; going to Brazil to be with family for at least a month…where is the inward untangling of who she is, how she got to where she is, a seemingly quickly seeking out another person with whom to have a relationship. Where is Julia on her own? I’m not criticizing, I’m voicing my personal observation. There was an immediate leap from her previous partner into a relationship of quickly moving in with Eliene. Hard to find yourself when there seems to be much attention to not being alone with yourself for a time. However it is you navigate these waters I wish you well.

[@FF-iz4su]

IMO, she needs spiritual guidance, like acknowledging where she is going to be when her time comes and also acknowledging God, the creator of everything and accept his Son, Jesus Christ because he can truly save her and make her open her eyes to life and give her hope and blessing by faith

[@vanessacrystalconsciousnes7156]

Good for you babe 👏👏👏👏 I can speak from experience, trying to love someone who doesn't whole heartedly love themselves doesn't work because they take their trauma out on you and resent you because you make them feel not enough ( because of themselves, nothing you do) just by being you.

[@pastapropaganda8103]

I love you Julia you’re a ray of sunshine ☀️ ❤

[@lovebeyondthestuffing05]

I hope your life gets better from here. As much as I wanted your relationship to work out I've realized that was me being be selfish... I wish you all the love and joy you deserve 💓

[@emma-louisedollyhorwood335]

Thank you so much for sharing, I have been going through similar things to you and it's been tough. Things will get better eventually though. Stay strong x

[@HolisticMara]

I absolutely love the honesty and transparency. I wish you guys all the best xo

[@FemmiGirlz]

I feel relieved for you. I stopped watching for awhile because I could tell the relationship wasn’t working several years ago and nothing was being done about it. I’m so glad that you’re finally getting out and taking control of your life and being free again please remember all those red flags and how to do things differently going forward with your new person, I wish you all the best

[@weisslr22]

Sending you hugs! You have so much love and support

[@CandyCoated7779]

as someone who had parents divorce ages ago it is hard but i think this guy you are with can help you heal and navigate through this since he is kind of on the inside of it and aware .i think you will be ok and over time it will get easier and you will move forward.

[@becs7715]

It's refreshing how honest you have been with each other, that will help your forever friendship. Very sad, but also a n opportunity for both of you to live full lives. Never say never, but you can always say no 💛

[@Tasneem_ino]

Julia, you are an angel 💕💕 please keep your chin up!! 😔😔💕

[@tammylopez3503]

You’re such a beautiful person. I really thought you guys would last , but you just never know what’s going on behind closed doors!!! I. So sorry you’re going through this. You do look a lot happier, so it’s what needed to be done , but I’m sad for you both, for the ending of a relationship that could’ve been so beautiful. My heart and prayers are with you and Eileen!!! Much love and many blessings to you both!!!❤❤❤

[@etheraldee111]

I'm so proud of you for opening up about this. As somone who's been watching you for years and a fan for years I can see you grow and I'm proud of you.

[@Cami-hu6pe]

ABOOOUUUT TIMEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[@geoffthomson1686]

It's great to see you so positive Julia. Good luck with your future ventures.

[@chenli9062]

I've followed you for a long time. Seeing you mature and grow. As sad as this is, it is also beautiful to see your growth. Sending you best wishes on your journey. 🤍

[@yourspookygay]

Dont co parent and keep her in your life! Get rid of her completely. It's not healthy and she will continue to use you in other ways

[@AsandaMahlangu]

it'll probably be too hard to get eileen to part with the pets

[@yourspookygay]

@@AsandaMahlangu that's part of her consequence

[@empressbryanna3673]

I remember them saying that the dog was more so Julia's and the cat's Eileen. But they do intend on being friends for some reason so 🤷🏾‍♀️ Idk y ppl that break up horribly think a friendship will mend things, if they weren't a friend in the romantic relationship then what's the difference with a platonic one.

[@aaron-go9]

​@@empressbryanna3673 Boundaries and expectations maybe?

[@googliebear8]

I wouldn’t co parent pets. Cut it off and move on other wise people will linger and you will never fully heal. Gift her a new dog or cat anything to cut ties. And don’t agree to things to be nice or because you are a nice person. You should keep the animals or one gets one. Animals aren’t worth keep someone around. And don’t be friends just move on.

[@lusppr]

The face you make to answer the troll question always cracks me up 😂😂😂😂

[@Teenywing]

I am so sorry. I definitely saw your wife starting to full with rage so I hope this helps. I hope you distance for your own sanity ❤❤

[@HeatherExplores19]

Wishing you happiness and healing! You made the right decision

[@EmileeBreeana19]

I think the only people who are “upset” by this are 12 year olds. Us actual adults have been waiting for this. This relationship was bad for so long and you should’ve never been married. I 100% support this.

[@Anonyma80]

This marriage was a joke 😂

[@FF-iz4su]

Those 12 year olds don’t know any better and should not be watching content like this

[@destiny8967]

I'm very proud of you trying your best to make this marriage work. But I am also proud that you saw when nothing was going to work anymore. You got this Julia and I'm so happy you are doing what is best for you now and thinking of your own happiness, not living for others.

[@thezennoodle1457]

You’ve been so sad and depressed for so long. This is definitely the right choice for you. I wish you all the luck and happiness. I started watching actually when you and Eileen came out with your first video. And I’ll still be watching 💕💖

[@Oamanda6]

I’m so so glad you’ve made the decision. I feel she wore you down and dulled your sparkle. You will get there. Chin up ❤❤

[@aliceright1]

Thank you for sharing! ❤

[@erinnicole477]

Kudos to you chicky!!! You deserve so much better.

[@MichelleMC6067]

I wish you both the BEST !! ❤

[@LP-km7gj]

I hope happiness for you both! ❤

[@tinahatfield8077]

Thank You, Julia. God Bless You

[@Kittianna-Guadalupita420]

Huh

[@angelav4568]

Please look after your physical health as we'll as your mental health through this period. Going through something this difficult can take a toll on both and being mindful of your overall health will really help you move forward.

[@lauradukes6828]

Sending Love to you Julia, hope you are ok ♥️💕

[@missmosvegankitchen8238]

I'm best friends with my ex still, 15 years after breaking up. She's in a very happy and healthy relationship for over a decade and her gf and I are great friends too. We're amazing people but we weren't amazing together anymore so breaking up made the most sense. We love each other like family so I understood you saying that in the previous video.

[@anacarrera5102]

Good luck Julia best wishes to you I'm sure something positive will come out 🙂

[@honeythefemaleamazonparrot6636]

I just hope you aren't numbing yourself with that man before you know who he really is and who you are

[@karenjocelynn]

Im sad too hear this ive been watching you for for years and you guys are my favorite couple. I support youre Decisions And i wish you guys the best i love you❤❤❤

[@elle1612]

Sending love to you Julia 💞

[@wingbat]

So happy for you Julia!! 💕 Question for future video - Are you still open/poly? Like will you still date women/other people while you're dating your current partner, or will you be monogamous with him? Just curious!

[@asarecharity8201]

You didn’t give her problems but she did,she knew right from the beginning who she was

[@KaitlanV]

You’ve got this ❤

[@angelamacakelly7706]

Hi beautiful lass. I've not been on for a while so I'm saddened to hear that you are going your separate ways, however, I'm not completely shocked either. Sometimes experiences in life are sent to us for a reason, mostly to learn and grow from, therefore alot of relationships aren't always necessarily for life. The way my dad described relationships to me when I was a child was, that you gave 2 human beings coming together who have lived completely different life's, even if you are the same age or living in the same area, you both grew up in different households with separate values, opinions, beliefs, morals, religions, senses of humour etc...... He said to me it was easy to fall in love but maintaining that love whilst embracing and/or tolerating our differences is a different thing entirely. Took a while, but as I matured I understood that the struggle is real. Knowing how much you are willing to accept someone you love for life depends entirely on individual tolerance levels and never usually anything to do with not loving them. Hope that makes sense. Love to you from Scotland xx❤

[@vandaborges953]

Finally pfff we have been waiting for this. I am proud of you

[@BeautybyRonja101]

Completely off topic, but you look STUNNING in this video! 🩷✨

[@isthatyoursandwich]

You deserve to be happy Julia. ❤

[@MollieMRowlands]

Love you Julia xx

[@hystericmysteric]

I’ve watched you for a long time! I’m a lesbian who will be 30 this summer and I’m always attracted to women 20+ years older than me. Everyone has always thought I was weird but it’s just me and I can’t help it 🤷🏼‍♀️ Sending you lots of love always! I’m hoping this part of your journey will be so healing 💝

[@missy1296]

The sadness in your eyes breaks my heart. You are so strong I wish you the best ❤️

[@kellyandkidsx1546]

You’re about to be so happy and have so much more money! It might take time to get over but I promise you, it’ll get so much better!

[@samslife8891]

Love you Julia ❤ always here for you

[@jenniicaroline1218]

just hoping for good things for you Julia, in your life and with your depression and well being. im so happy to hear you found a medication that is actually helping!! if you felt comfortable enough im sure many ppl would benefit from that as a video. im still struggling myself to find the right meds to get my life back together.

[@Dave_Burgundy]

What did y’all think was gonna happen? It was a fucked relationship for a while

[@miraclemilton8334]

Julia was the one that moved in with Eileen after two months of being together. On top of that, Julia was the one that got on one knee and asked Eileen to marry her a couple of months later. As far as I’m concerned, julia brought this on herself. This whole money thing about Eileen, julia should’ve thought about that before she moved in her and married.

[@saraily3]

Julia at the end of the day you do what is best for you & eileen. If you want to coparent coparent, if you want to be friends be friends. Whatever makes u happy❤😊

[@Toucan11]

It’s about time you got rid of her. Everyone knows you can do way better than her

[@goodhunter6433]

I also stayed with my last ex for way too long, hoping it'd get better. Our relationship was super toxic and there was no way the situation would've turned around, but I'm very loyal and I'd rather fight than give up. We've been together for many years and he gaslighted me into thinking I'd never find a better fit than him. But once we separated, I felt a sense of freedom and relief I've never experienced. It was the best decision I could've made. In that sense, I'm very happy for you, even tho it's a bittersweet feeling. I've been here from the very beginning and it's so good to see you get better.

[@karlaperez_nau384]

We’re here for you girl ❤

[@heatheralice89]

I am glad you are co-parenting the pets 😺🐕

[@lolasbeih7021]

She’s such a beautiful person inside and out she deserves the world

[@purpledragonfly4]

Go home to Brazil for a while, let your mama take care of you, feed your soul with the familiar. ❤

[@watchthisheadspace]

Plsase take time to heal. You cant be friends straight away if ever. It hurts but it's true. How can you heal and move on whilst still being in contact like before

[@anamariacorneanu6834]

Hi Julia I have a question what would you do with your tattoos that you did with your ex wife do you erase them? I love you

[@dallyhernandez687]

I’m so happy for you! Btw you would be a great mommy ! Hugs.

[@italianmommaotts3185]

I've been a big fan of both of your's since the beginning and so I feel I must say Julia when u brought someone else into your bedroom that was the beginning of the end. We all seen u falling out of love. I don't even know how Eileen could've felt other than falling deeper into her depression. I hope u both just find peace and happiness again. The love u two shared was beautiful ❤️❤️❤️

[@Brittoxo]

Julia is literally so beautiful 😻 ❤ 🌈 everything is going to be okay love don’t worry I know it’s not right now but you will be okay soon 😊

[@Kerri-AnnLoves2Craft]

I’ve been watching your channel for years now and I feel that you made the right choice for yourself. I adore Elien and no negativity towards her. And the end of the day YOU need to be happy that’s it that’s all ❤❤❤

[@bluejay7777]

I’ve been married almost 11 years and one thing I realized was that my perception of marriage was way off. Every year a part of me died . It took a lot of therapy for my husband and I come to terms with our red flags and work through them. Having kids made it easier because we had to fight harder but if we didn’t have kids I think we would have called it quits a long time ago. Much love 🙏