Do the men clean? - Ask Laura

Time to answer some more of your questions!
00:00 A Valentine's day anecdote
01:02 Can you chose your own career? If so, how do you make sure you have someone to do every job there is? Do you think certain jobs are for male or female, for instance, can a man be responsible for cleaning? And can a student live on the Bruderhof while studying or do they go to live on campus?
04:24 I notice that you don’t have any carpets or comfy armchairs or couches. Is that by choice to avoid the temptation to laze around on the couch doing nothing or is there another reason?
05:15 Do you go on vacation? How long? Does it feel weird? Do you miss your community?
07:19 I would like to know if anyone stays in one place, or is it necessary to move around from community to community? Who decides who moves and where and why? What if someone balks at moving?
*****
About Me
I'm a young mom living in an intentional community called the Bruderhof, and vlogging about what that's like.
If you want to know more, subscribe and ring the bell so you don't miss any new videos:
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I used to vlog on the Bruderhof channel. See all my old videos in this playlist:
→ • Meet My Mom - Laura fr...
*****
What is the Bruderhof?
The Bruderhof is an intentional Christian community of people living in radical discipleship in the spirit of the first church in Jerusalem. We gladly renounce private property and share everything in common. Our vocation is a life of service to God, each other, and you. Learn more at the Bruderhof KZbin channel: ► kzbin.info...
More info is at:
► Website: www.bruderhof.com
► Instagram: www.bruderhof.com/instagram
► Twitter: www.bruderhof.com/twitter
► Facebook: www.bruderhof.com/facebook

[@jesussaves6625]

I love the fact that there are youth counselors who keep the high school students engaged when school is out! Such a wonderful idea.

[@praxistheodicy3442]

Thank you for doing another "Ask Laura" video. As someone who is thinking of the potentiality of joining the Bruderhof some day, I find these videos the most helpful.

[@LaurafromtheBruderhof]

You are so welcome!

[@juliejacobs9424]

I love the colour palette your wearing. Just right for a winter's day. ❤️

[@LaurafromtheBruderhof]

I love it!

[@meletcl]

I watched this again and this time I was able to hear your response re do men clean included, "..the bar is high." Getting on my soapbox, there is nothing that congenitally excludes males from rising to that challenge. I think raising boys to be good husbands includes having them do chores such as cleaning, along with any sisters, so as to instill respect for what is historically viewed as "women's work" and appreciation of what it takes to maintain a home. I think there might be fewer divorces if men helped around the home, particularly if both parents work outside the home. Perhaps the organizational needs of a community differs somewhat from those of a nuclear family living as a singular unit outside of a communal setup. Getting off my soapbox, your laughter at that juncture of the video says it all to my mind. It seems that your community does adhere to essentially a balanced allocation of responsibilities - to a degree. Personally we are and generally life is, always a work in progress. As always thoroughly enjoy your videos and happy St. Valentines to you and your dear ones. Now I have to look up who exactly St. Valentine was or if he is simply a myth.! 😊

[@LaurafromtheBruderhof]

Yes we're definitely a work in progress! I also get on a soapbox from time to time 😂

[@yazzabanana]

I love your seat! Never put two thoughts together that Chris would have made it for some reason, but mid century modern is beautiful so my hat is off to him!!

[@Asterion67]

Laura, you are awesome! Thank you for your joy and laughter! Greetings and blessings from Italy!

[@LaurafromtheBruderhof]

Thank you! You too!

[@jacksoldano5752]

Dear Laura, this to me was one of finest presentations on community life and the love you all feel to one another manifested by meeting the needs of the community. I thank thee Laura.

[@LaurafromtheBruderhof]

Thanks Jack!

[@bbeige54]

In just a few if your vlogs you’ve answered most of my questions. Thank you. I look forward to planning a visit.

[@diddl03]

Thank you Laura! Your videos are so interesting! 🤗💛

[@CharCanuck14]

Another great video Laura.....especially the ending with fun in the snow!

[@LaurafromtheBruderhof]

Thanks so much!

[@oriahsdollhouse7954]

Love your videos! Much love❤❤

[@davidjamieson59]

Loved seeing the youth having fun sledging :)

[@rasputinara6477]

Blessings to you Laura! You do great work

[@LaurafromtheBruderhof]

Thank you so much!

[@lunashynesparkles8913]

Awesome..thank you. ✌️🙌.

[@professorg000]

You are a wonderful spokes woman for Bruderhof and exhibit the great vitality found in living the life of a Christian touched by the hand of the Creator. Unconditional surrender to the Lord is the path to peace. You reveal that...your parents must be proud. It pleases me to think your path will eventually cross with my 27 children and grandchildren....who are being raised well also by their mothers and grandmother. Best Wishes

[@alexandraa5424]

FYI.... as someone with an accounting degree, I can attest that it IS boring! That’s why I use it for white collar crime consulting - more fun to catch the bad guys!

[@renagodfrey2138]

I love to Watch you, your laugh makes my day, every time!

[@zappawench6048]

The floral painting behind you is beautiful - is it one of your creations, Laura?

[@may.theresia975]

I have a feeling it is and that there actually is a video of Laura painting this...

[@LaurafromtheBruderhof]

Yes, it is!

[@eirika2001]

@@LaurafromtheBruderhof it is truly lovely.

[@josefmartinchrist508]

I always loved your videos and admire your religious views and form of living! Thank you for sharing these awesome videos! May God bless you all!

[@swampophelia2098]

Yay you answered my question about chairs haha thank you Laura xx

[@LaurafromtheBruderhof]

Of course!!

[@torrie5882]

I love that style couch Chris made. I like that it doesn’t encourage lazing around and is simple and easy to clean.

[@gigijordan8960]

Today, at work, a hydraulic lift needed to be repaired. Then, I heard a voice which was atypical...a lovely young lady was part of the mechanical team. I hope the same equality exist in your world. I felt pretty awesome that all the struggle for fairness and equality from the "past". Just a thought and thank you for your wonderful broadcast. Happy 💓 day to your family.

[@kathleentaylor8840]

Moving can be very much an adventure akin to the sensation of a vacation. The work appears to be low-key as well and providing opportunities for leisure.

[@NSchoonman]

You ansered my questions, thank you so much! When I saw the title of this video I got all exited. I love your anser on the cleaning question, I mostly are also not content with the result, if my boyfriend does the cleaning. :’D

[@SavvyArtz]

I love how joyful and cheerful you are in your videos! One can really see Jesus moving in your words and actions.

[@reasonerenlightened2456]

I wonder if the head of the church has an airplane?

[@christineconroy6409]

You can always armchair Travel Laura. I love your simple life, you must feel so loved and secure.

[@joetrester3139]

Laura, how refreshing to hear that there are people in this world who actually consider sacrifice in a positive light. To imitate Jesus, one has to be filled with sacrificial love and, obviously, your community understands that. I am so appreciative of your authentic and unashamed ability to articulate your faith. I think you should tell Chris that he has to clean on Valentine’s Day! I hope you have a blessed weekend!

[@LaurafromtheBruderhof]

Chris is actually a very tidy person.

[@joetrester3139]

@@LaurafromtheBruderhof Then he must at least get you a box of chocolates!!

[@simondavey7787]

I love your Q and As. Do you and Chris have any Valentine's traditions? I have attended a few Foundations of Faith Zoom calls with Peter and Emily in Pennsylvania. I am feeling lifted by their mentorship and discussion.

[@LaurafromtheBruderhof]

We just try and be nicer than usual to each other 😂🤣 So glad you're joining the zoom calls.

[@lifechoices7869]

I ADORE your laugh😊

[@traceylouisebooth1810]

YOUR SMILE IS CONTAGIOUS THANKYOU ❤️ AND WHAT SORT OF JOB COULD I DO WITH BEING SEVERLY SIGHT IMPARED /BLIND.?

[@teaandcrochet]

Very nice answers!

[@LaurafromtheBruderhof]

Glad you think so!

[@istvansipos6395]

Love yah Laura ... 😘😷

[@frankclarke6651]

Kia ora-Greetings Laura. Most men who work outside like Labour or laborious jobs don't like helping out with household chores after doing their work responsibilities at work, but not so at home.

[@nikki27ish]

A family requires everyone pitch in working outside the home doesn't excuse anyone male or female from helping with keeping their own home in order.

[@ChristinaOurWoodHome]

Laura, have you already talked about mental health in the Bruderhof? I wonder if there are some people who experience stress, anxiety, or depression and would benefit from professional help or medication. If that is the case, is there a stigma associated with mental health struggles?

[@LaurafromtheBruderhof]

I may have talked about it once. I might ask one of our health care providers to give some insights. There's no stigma attached to mental illness. Some folks have heavier burdens to carry than others and need all our support.

[@Hanna-yn5ou]

@@LaurafromtheBruderhof Agree that this would be an interesting topic. Physical health interests me as well. What about people who simply aren't 100% all of the time. For example if somebody got long term Covid or some condition that simply meant they had to take it slowly every now and then. I get the impression that Bruderhof is very much for those adults who can work at full capacity every day. That is certainly what I would want to do, if I was a member. Nobody wants to be regarded as a freeloader, right?

[@tcl5853]

Nicely done!

[@LaurafromtheBruderhof]

Thanks!

[@rebeccarichardson6761]

Your life here fascinates me and its definitely something I'd love to be a part of if I was on my own.

[@Hanna-yn5ou]

Hi Laura! Thanks for your videos! I was wondering if you could address the following, at some point: Some examples of people that were excluded from the community (anonymous, of course!). There must be situations when things go wrong, so it would be interesting to know what they are. What the community's perspective was, how you felt about it and why it wasn't possible to solve the situation.

[@ruthlaurie-hopper3489]

Enjoy the snow.

[@meletcl]

Your laughter is infectious but because of it I am still wondering if men do any cleaning? Your giggles obscured your reply at least they did for my ears. Inquiring minds want to know if they also mop the floors, clean the bathrooms, vacuum etc? Love a man who cleans...😂😂 equality reigns. Enjoy your snow frolics today. ⛄

[@eirika2001]

Books Laura....can a person have a personal library? I know you don’t have possessions but books are so precious how are they handled? Is there a communal (large and various collection) library? If a person comes to the community with books may they keep some or all of them in their home if they are willing to share?

[@suzannepeck5610]

Laura, I KNEW we were soul sisters! My day job is chief technology officer, and I think the most boring job ever invented was accountant, god love them!

[@LaurafromtheBruderhof]

lol

[@brandib2714]

I love watching your videos. I have a couple of questions about the vacation answer. I get that you guys don't go on a "vacation" like as a family or anything like that, but what about to see family that is not apart of the Bruderhoff. Do people who have family that are not apart of the community able to go see their families from time to time? Or can their families come see them at the community?

[@LaurafromtheBruderhof]

Both of those things happen. Visits to and from family members

[@Sidian]

I'd love to hear more about relationships on the Bruderhof. What percentage of people would you say are in a married relationship? As you guys are more traditional, would you say the average age of marriage and having kids is super young compared to the outside world? As a result of this, if someone were to join the community in their late 20s or 30s would they have 'missed the boat' and most likely be single for the rest of their life?

[@snowwhite2709]

I don't know how and where you get your questions from, so I want to know what a typical day in your life looks like. I also want to know are your typical days 7 days a week or do you get Sat and Sun off, or 5 days on, 2 days off, or 7 days a week etc etc. Thanks

[@emmib1388]

there is a video where she explains her day in a life :-)

[@dariusrad8058]

"we are not nomad" was very funny.

[@goldielocks8231]

So sweet you are great

[@LaurafromtheBruderhof]

Thank you so much 😀

[@MandiPlaysBeatSaber]

I have a question and if it's already been answered in another video, please direct me to it. I understand that y'all try to live exactly how the early church did which is why everything is communal which is awesome. My question is how do you spread the gospel to the world if for the most part, everyone works and stays in the community? Do you do outreaches or go on mission trips?

[@LaurafromtheBruderhof]

Great question. I'll try and answer in an upcoming video but shortly we have quite a few people out on the road meeting people reaching out in whatever ways they can.

[@jesussaves6625]

Would you be able to, say, visit another bruderhof community, work and participate there, just as a way to see another part of the country/ world?

[@melfros7100]

I believe Laura answered the question: You go where the community sends you in accordance with the needs of the community . The vow of obedience is required of all members. See Foundations of our faith and calling for a more detailed description of membership.

[@mollycole1581]

Hi Laura, I'm wondering whether people who join the community from elsewhere can bring possessions such as books with them, as long as they are willing to donate them to the community library, i.e. can people bring posessions if they relinquish their ownership and are willing to share them?

[@LaurafromtheBruderhof]

Yes absolutely

[@azraeljo6862]

If you are into architecture/design - furniture design is a sought after position within the community.

[@SomeoneBeginingWithI]

How does the communal property work for students who are living on campus? Do they take some Bruderhof clothes in their size to uni with them? What about things like bedding and plates and pots and other things students are usually expected to bring with them when they move to uni?

[@LaurafromtheBruderhof]

The community helps them get set up with what they need.

[@SomeoneBeginingWithI]

@@LaurafromtheBruderhof Do they wear the Bruderhof plain dress while at uni? Do they have the option to try wearing different kinds of clothing?

[@LaurafromtheBruderhof]

If they choose to leave of course they wear whatever they want but if they're still part of the Bruderhof they wear what we all wear.

[@BMoll87]

In the scientific institute where I was working before COVID made us telework, most of the cleaners were men. I would say 70:30 ratio. But in my personal life, most couples I know have the women clean the majority of the house. I can only think of 2 couples where it's the guy that's more tidy than the woman. In my relationship I take care of most of the home, while my partner cooks and tidies the kitchen. We also have a help with cleaning once a week, as we both work full time.

[@LaurafromtheBruderhof]

I think it's only fair to split the housework 50/50

[@BMoll87]

@@LaurafromtheBruderhof 100% agreed. It's pretty rare though, I think. Especially when partners have different needs for cleanliness..

[@imogenkeen3817]

If you were to move communities are you allowed to come back and visit your old one? (especially if youve left family behind?)

[@LaurafromtheBruderhof]

Oh sure we do a lot of visiting

[@LetsWatchTheSunset]

I'm really interested to know if you were moved away from family (parents, grandparents etc) say to a different country - would you get to visit them? If you aren't able to travel does that just mean accepting never seeing family again?

[@LaurafromtheBruderhof]

We visit each other often

[@emzadia]

I've always been intrigued by the ring on your right hand. Some say it's from your vows. Is that like a marriage to the Lamb thing? That would be cool. And how in the world do you sled in a skirt??? Love your videos!

[@LaurafromtheBruderhof]

Yes! I'll talk about the ring in on of my next videos and give you a closer look.

[@emzadia]

@@LaurafromtheBruderhof Thanks!

[@kihwa230]

How do you deal with conflicts within the community?

[@melfros7100]

That is a very interesting question. It is relevant in a church community where they believe that the spirit speaks with one voice. I hope Laura finds the time to tackle this question forthrightly.

[@H3arme3r0ar]

This may be in one of your videos but if not ... what are your views on head coverings for womens hair ? Are there rules about women's or men's hair and men's facial hair ?

[@ahoward3819]

How is crime handled in community? Minor crimes vs major crimes? Are things handled by community leaders or by the local authorities of the state in which you live? I am sure crime rates are low but they have to exist, even in the Bruderhof?

[@LaurafromtheBruderhof]

Good questions. Will answer in a vid.

[@glorianelson6663]

Do older folks come to the Bruderhof?

[@AnneS508]

I M wondering if You could talk a little bit more about being asked to move. As a psychogist, I am aware that some people might find it too incredibly stressful to move, to make such a change, to move away from family and close friends. It isn't simply a matter of attitude but of anxiety, stability, relationships that ground one. Can one say no or is there recognition that a move may simply not be good for some people's mental health?

[@LaurafromtheBruderhof]

Good point. I'll try and talk about it in a future vid.

[@eirika2001]

When things are safe again will you encourage interested visitors to see how the life works?

[@emmib1388]

yes ! she has been encouraging people all along and mentions that , until that time, you can do it partially virtual!

[@eirika2001]

@@emmib1388 lovely, thank you 🙂

[@chazchillings3019]

Has the bruderhof made a mission in Texas? Good economy and large land.

[@LaurafromtheBruderhof]

Not yet!

[@chazchillings3019]

@@LaurafromtheBruderhof it’s fine. Summers are hot.

[@michaiahbowers1282]

Hey 😊 So I have a question. If someone is already baptized and wants to join your community, do they have to get rebaptized?

[@LaurafromtheBruderhof]

If they've had believers baptism they don't have to get rebaptized.

[@michaiahbowers1282]

@@LaurafromtheBruderhof So they don't have to be baptized by someone in your group then?

[@LaurafromtheBruderhof]

No

[@bridgwll]

Just found your Channel. I am in Australia. You could move here.

[@rachelcookie321]

What would happen if someone wasn’t pulling their weight in the community and wasn’t contributing? Would they be asked to leave? I assume this probably hasn’t happened because people sign up knowing they need to work hard for the community but i’m sure the Bruderhof isn’t immune to people taking advantage of the community’s generosity.

[@RowanBlake]

are visits on hold due to covid? I look forward to visiting one day

[@LaurafromtheBruderhof]

It's a bit limited now but there are virtual visits :) www.bruderhof.com/en/visit-us/zoom

[@billdale2828]

Question, you say community, the word Church a few times, exactly what church is it? Incorporated that way? thanks for the videos Oh, PS. if you look at how you move your eyes, side to side, you are probably an audio person that is think, learn in verbal format best, compared to visual or hands on

[@GK-gj3iu]

As a Christian group, I'm assuming someone who is part of the LGBTQ+ community would not be able to join? What are your thoughts on the LGBTQ+ community?

[@Storjunkare]

The question has been beaten to death. She’s addressed this in previous videos and comment sections. People who identify as gay, lesbian, transgender, etc can live in the community, but cannot marry. They are expected to be celibate.

[@GK-gj3iu]

@@Storjunkare Ah thank you. I was not aware.

[@GreaterGood2024]

Hello dear, how are you? Blessed holy greetings from Malaysia 🇲🇾

[@LaurafromtheBruderhof]

Hello 😊

[@GreaterGood2024]

@@LaurafromtheBruderhof how are things at the Bruderhof community currently in terms of day to day life during the Covid-19 Scamdemic? Has life changed much during Covid? Or has it affected the Bruderhof only minimally? Would be interesting to know. Thanks

[@lillyskyscraper6]

Is that girls in trousers? =O I thought you were not allowed to wear them. Although makes sense if its that cold.

[@SomeoneBeginingWithI]

Laura has said before that women and girls usually don't wear trousers, but they can for physical activity where trousers are more practical. The example she gave was if you're going jogging, you would wear tracksuit bottoms. It looks like in the video they are wearing ski trousers because they are sledging in the snow.

[@karynb7781]

My daughter and I like to step into the snow barefoot. If it isn't icy, it's exhilarating! I bet Jesus NEVER did that? Lol. He'd know better. Maybe God would say, 'don't embarrass Us doing that!' ? IDK? I think Jesus was a fun guy though. He'd definitely make that hiking/camping trip with the boys. He had A LOT of surprises up his sleeve in his time! I hope He had a lot of smiles to share every day...

[@petagayekrug5204]

Where can I find your skirts Ms Laura,I would love to buy some.

[@alittlecat8356]

Wow beautiful skirt Laura😍♥️

[@villemokellin]

That was what i was thinking :)

[@leebennett1821]

Yes men do Clean just not Obsessively

[@emmib1388]

yes men can clean... but do you really want (most) of the to do it ? LOL

[@acgraphics1139]

@@emmib1388 it should be equal

[@emmib1388]

@@acgraphics1139 it should be whatever the couple decides -- each has different gifts God gave them and are better at certain activities while it is best for the family they stay away from other things.

[@alicezvacek6086]

I was wondering, who watches your boys while you work?

[@emmib1388]

they have people who watch the children -- just like when people drop their children off at daycare.

[@swampophelia2098]

You say it’s more important that you spend time serving others than travelling etc, but you are all just serving each other within the church......do you do any community outreach

[@emmib1388]

yes - -they do community outreach in their local community like the food bank and others (don't remember what other examples she gave)

[@christinakhorasani3315]

Hello Laura, Do you have a private email I can use? Thanks very much Christina

[@LaurafromtheBruderhof]

Hi Christina if you email [e-mail] they can give you my email address

[@tanagiberson4770]

can you cut ✂️your hair