DRAGON AGE II (Zero Punctuation)

[@15oClock]

"Hawke's elderly mother has the same size bosom as a table dancer, Freud, Freud!" Love that line.

[@JustinCage56]

"For the record, I ended up hooking up with the gay mage fellow" AND THE FANGIRLS GO WILD!!!

[@thedarknesscallingme]

"took it up the arse...like a champ" i was crying with laughter

[@KristianKumpula]

I've probably watched this video about 5 or so times and I got that joke just now.

[@HarryBillyBobGeorge]

That "someone telling stories while they put the play together" analogy is perfect, and I love DA2.

[@tcironbear21]

I am surprised you did not bring up how useless your choices are. This is how I remember this game. 1) My sister is a mage so I decide my character is sympathetic to mages 2) I encounter a mage with a problem who is complaining about how unfair the world. 3) I solve the mage's problem or offer credible solution to mage's problem 4) Mage still whines about how unfair the world is and turns himself into a crazed demon. 5) I kill insane demon to protect the world that now seems justified about its bigotry 6) Return to step 2 until all the mages within 50 miles are dead.

[@ENCHANTMEN_]

The problem with the whole mages vs Chantry conflict is that they can both go fuck themselves. If my character from Origins was there to watch Mr. Crawling-in-my-skin blew up the chantry, they'd probably get out some popcorn and enjoy the fireworks.

[@ATomicAstronaut]

"Mr. Crawling-in-my-skin" I'm dead lol

[@stalker-je2on]

But it's not like the templars ever stop pressuring mages in the story and they still get abused and discriminated in the circles so yeah the world was still unfair for mages.

[@ZoomingOut402]

Man I was thinking the same thing. In the end all fucking mages turn to blood magic, justifying the absolute genocide. I dont know what the fuck they were thinking

[@b3rz3rk3r9]

Sad thing is the same thing happened to me, and I WAS A GODDAMN MAGE!

[@fentanyl-induced-coma]

"Dragon Age: Intermission" well, that was close huh

[@JoshSweetvale]

I caught that one too.

[@The_Fat_Turtle]

I came here to say something similar, someone on the development team must be a ZP fan.

[@nathanmelon5215]

+The Fat Turtle or have a time machine

[@HarryBillyBobGeorge]

Well the whole Inquisition thing was heavily hinted at beforehand and I think the title was confirmed not long after DA2.

[@freedantheeternal]

DavidtheWavid That's because a lot of the plot of Inquisition was supposed to be in the Awakening sized DLC for Dragon Age 2, the Exalted March. Fact is the DLC was cancelled because the game bombed. It's a harsh but important lesson as to why you don't release a game without an ending and without much of plot anyway.

[@bjarkiorleifsson6100]

"There's only like 3 dragons in the whole game, they should have called it Racism Age"

[@Daniel_C_Griffin]

Just to be that guy. It's named Dragon Age because it's the century of the Dragon. Centuries are named after certain events in said century, for example the Exalted age which had several Exalted Marches. Dragon is named because it was thought they were made extinct by the Nevarran Dragon Hunters (Cassandra's family) and it turns out some survived, bred and repopulated.

[@urge-avatar6022]

@@Daniel_C_Griffin was that in the codex of dragon age origins? cause I never read those :/

[@roadjcat]

@@urge-avatar6022 I remember seeing the definition of the ages in one of the loading screens. May have been Origins. Pretty sure the naming was established before Inquisition so it was either in Origins or 2.

[@nahuelleandroarroyo]

It's called because one High Dragon burned the f*ck out of Orlais when they were supposed to be extinct. Years are tabulated on 100 "Age" gaps, this games mostly happening arround 9(Dragon).30-40

[@veinmire]

@Dan Griffin The way they handled that was fucking cheap. I really REALLY try not harp on about how games are made to appeal to disinterested casuals but it was so blatant that they reintroduced dragons purely for marketing appeal. The dragons were very fun to kill, but in my opinion, reintroduced only for that. They seemed to spit in the face of the game lore for this reason alone. I could even forgive that if they took some more time to explain and expand on how they came back, but not only do they not do that in Inquisition killing off this highly endangered species garners no consequences or even any disapproval from companions. It's very clearly explained that these are vastly misunderstood creatures and yet killing them is just shrugged off as a sport/past time? Cheap.

[@MrDeath1458]

For the few people who don't get why he said the Deep Roads expedition was pointless, its because as he said earlier in the video he traveled with Anders. If you take Anders with you to the Deep Roads then your sister lives.

[@Retbullgivesyouwings]

MrDeath1458 Or you can leave her behind and she also lives.

[@MrDeath1458]

That too.

[@Drowninginantimatter]

4:24 'Without a hitch' both Varric and Hawke lose a sibling because of that expedition.

[@starkiller23610]

So spoiler warnings aren't your strong suite

[@Drowninginantimatter]

Bruh, it's over 5 years old

[@elizabethstevenson9707]

Dragon Age 2... Anyone noticed how the main theme of the game is family? Your family escapes Ferelden and end up all dying or something. Varric and Bartrand's family relationship was torn apart by greed (and... Drug use?). The mages are like a family (maybe...) and they do anything to stick together... Fenris and his sister... Merrill and her clan... There's probably more...

[@neosaneo2]

DA2 always felt like they were making the game one act at a time, and had an outline for each part just in case EA was an asshole and they needed the game out quickly. what i'm saying is that the beginning was okay, the middle was great, and the end felt rushed.

[@XavierXonora]

so like ME3

[@neosaneo2]

Anthony Paull yeah, except DA2's ending was just unremarkably mediocre.

[@DogOfHades]

neosaneo2 so like ME3

[@neosaneo2]

DogOfHades XD

[@neosaneo2]

***** well, EA has a big name to get people to buy the games, so i understand why they'd want to get bought.

[@jackskellingtonsora]

"It's someone being kicked out on stage and nervously telling stalling anecdotes while they frantically put the play together." That is probably the most accurate description of this game ever. In terms of its relationship to Inquisition.

[@leftyfourguns]

I honestly do not understand what the hell happened with Bioware on this one. Maybe their development office had a gas leak or something when this was being made?

[@Fearfulcrawdog]

Arcralf EA where get developers go to get suck into the mainstream idea of "we need more action fuck the story fuck the game play just throw in a bunch of baddy's and throw the main character in" and on the off chance that a fan boy of EA see's this FUCK YOU AND FUCK EA

[@Fearfulcrawdog]

Fearfulcrawdog Good* opps before the spelling nazis can strike

[@himynameisbaloghdani]

well... that one's rather easy. EA. 'nuff said.

[@DastardlyDistaste]

Fearfulcrawdog Oops*

[@Fearfulcrawdog]

Dastardly Distaste Fuck off

[@Tounushi]

"So my interpretation of the character was that he took it up the ass like a champ" LOL Sounds a lot like my mages in every combat situation...

[@enkephalin07]

There are already enough games that meet Epic Fantasy expectations, with the overarching existential threat embodied by one guy, the Big Bad, and the struggle between unambiguously right and unambiguously wrong. I would like to see more titles experiment with speculative fiction tropes on a fantasy backdrop; they couldn't do worse than this one.

[@IsaVarg]

*Spoilers below.* Personally loved the game. The copy-of-a-copy dungeons didn't bother me at all, since my focus was mostly on the story, the characters, or the combat. All three of which I was delighted with in the game. Barely used tactics, but to the extent that I did, it worked nicely enough. I always got the sense that there was a plot, to be honest. Perhaps because Anders spoke about Knight-Commander Meredith very early on, and the Qunari had been clearly established by Act 2, at which point I felt most things made sense and were set up nicely. I like a story that makes me look back at the wholeness rather than know how it all works out from the beginning. I knew I'd have to kill Meredith, get rid of the Arishok, and choose sides. Those three things were all clear to me very early on. Seeing the plot develop slowly through the narration and interactions with characters made it all feel thoroughly thought-through to me. It felt realistic in a way fantasy never has for me. It's always felt manufactured. As much as I love LOTR, it's always felt imaginary. DA2 manages to feel like a fantasy game and still feel painfully real to me. Perhaps I'm just a romantic.

[@LordBloodraven]

It was okay, but Origins was far better despite lacking a fully voiced main character. The main failing was that the final villain had not directly wronged our character in the early game, so while Hawke was considered the Champion of Kirkwall, this was an aimless character who only got things done that immediately affected the Hawke family and friends. Thus, the majority of Hawke's achievements were reactions.

[@keasy666]

Merril... all day... everyday.

[@sir.mannington]

Ya know I was Merril all the way until she witnessed the consequences of her actions but seemed unable to accept them. That kinda ruined things for me.

[@Fiery891]

What annoyed me most about Dragon Age 2 was that the end hinted at a greater battle to come. So I thought: Right, didn't enjoy this game but atleast they now have a good set up for the sequel. Then they resolve that conflict in a novel and Dragon Age Inquisition's plot: Demon invasion! I prefer stories with grey areas, people have to do something horrible for a good outcome later on. Or maybe a horrible person that is the best candidate for what he is doing because the others are indecisive. Demons, they're pretty much always evil and their only motivation is they want to wreck our stuff for lolz.

[@danniruthvan3265]

It's better if you look at it as a romance sim with some fighty bits. :P

[@lexslate2476]

I rented a room from a dude who worked at Bioware while this was being made. It was absolutely a rushed-out mess of massive asset recycling. Nice if you like revisiting the same fucking cave for every fucking mission.

[@batmenace15]

If he went with the gay mage I have to ask, what exactly did he do with him once he... well... made a church go kablooey? Me? I brought him... to justice.

[@deathrooster14]

YEEEEAAAHHHHHH!!!!! "Cue The Who"

[@Hwyadylaw]

I enjoyed it. Mostly because of the references to events and characters in Origins and the fact that everyone seems to hate it (lower expectation -> lower disappointment). It's nowhere near as good as Origins, but it's still an ok game

[@andyb2977]

This game was the beginning of the end for Bioware.

[@teeny733]

"...universally identical bodies that leave Hawke's elderly mother with the same massive curvaceous bosoms as a table dancer. FREUD! FREUD!" I died laughing, oh my God. XD It's so damn true, though. I didn't mind this game as much as some (okay, the lather-rinse-repeat cycle of dungeons, houses, and caves looking EXACTLY FREAKING SIMILAR got on my nerves really quick, I'll admit) but yea, definitely a valid point there.

[@chandler9107]

Yahtzee's voice helps me get through science. Whenever I have to read from the book I imagine it in his voice and it becomes mildly interesting!

[@hall9111]

1:11 I love that. It's a very rare bit of hesitation that I like to think implies for once, he was straining for a joke, but had to think a bit before coming up with one. It cracks me up every time (though not quite for the reason he wanted it to.)

[@14DANESSJ]

I wouldn't say Hawke is completely monotone and boring, depending on the dialogue choices he's actually one of the most charismatic RPG characters I've ever played. Heck in DAI he comes back as a side character and completely stands up on his own. He is definitely alot better then say other Role-playing protagonist's such as Commander Shepard from Mass Effect who is practically an emotionless robot, or Geralt from The Witcher series who is just sounds so dull and disinterested in everything he's doing.

[@14DANESSJ]

+Jack Barrett My apologies good sir, there fixed.

[@jackbarrett9884]

+14DANESSJ Good! Good!

[@gabrielgroenendaal3007]

+14DANESSJ I agree with Yahtzee in that every single one of Hawke's "charismatic" responses made me want to bludgeon him/her. Maybe it was just the line delivery but honestly, shut up Hawke. You actually made me miss my silent protagonist in DA:O.

[@14DANESSJ]

+Gabriel Groenendaal I disagree, at least he felt like an actual character instead of an empty shell most of the time.

[@gabrielgroenendaal3007]

I felt like my DA:O protagonists were more of actual characters. They had more than 3 pre-determined responses in every conversation and their lack of voice acting let me fill in the blanks regarding their delivery or intentions. But that's just me. I'm an imaginative bloke, and appreciated the room DA:O gave me to roleplay.

[@RarestDragon]

I have a cousin that named his character "Mike Hawke" after seeing someone mention it on the internet.

[@pavester4]

Loved both games but everything he said in this review was pretty much spot on my thoughts exactly. That being said I am ball-numbingly excited for Dragon Age Inquisition

[@arbiteras]

i don't think that DA;I is going to be a good game,i've a feeling that it will be mediocre at best

[@hawkeyegough9090]

arbiteras knowing the developer somewhat they seem to do the first was balltickling second was a bit too rough with your pubes and the third went back to tickling your balls but in a new way

[@MrAlexanderLang]

arbiteras for fanboys and fangals it will be really awesome however to those of us with brain Dragon Age is dead since second game has released, no more Baldur's Gate sort of games i suppose everything has to be another CoD.

[@neverlandhunter6988]

***** Ooh someone has his "high and mighty my opinion is better than yours" hat on. For those of us, and when I say us I mean me because I'm not in a position of power where I speak for other people, that actually take the time to weigh the pros and cons of DA2 they can see it is not a bad game just vastly inferior to its predecessor. And DAO is a nice slice of fantasy lovers heaven. In my opinion. Opinion. We all have them. We should respect others and not act like a know it all.

[@fortkavanagh]

I like both games ..... (they were okay) but everything he said in this review was pretty much spot on my thoughts exactly. That being said & done I am not ball-numbingly excited for Dragon Age Inquisition (I think Bioware is going to fuck it up just like they did with Mass Effect 3)

[@littlea53]

It has been done I have finally seen every ZeroPunctuation video on KZbin.

[@Halvos12]

I threw Hawke at the gaint spider thing in the next game and then stopped playing. honestly how could it get better?

[@ChristophBrinkmann]

Gotta love the diehard fans of this game. "Oh COME ON it's not bad! Just because it reuses the exact same dungeon map over and over and over and over again doesn't mean it keeps reusing the same map! Just because your choices don't affect the game in any way doesn't mean your choices don't affect the game at all! Just because the camera never does what you need it to and doesn't show you what it's supposed to doesn't mean there's camera problems! And just because the story is rushed and disappointing doesn't mean it's disappointing and rushed!" (I am of course exaggerating BUT NOT BY MUCH.) First and third games, with all their flaws, are worth your time. This one? Yeah not so much.

[@heatherholme5248]

100%. I can understand people enjoying the game even though it’s bad, but to argue it’s somehow objectively good? Incomprehensible.

[@sk4p3g04t]

at 1:11 you can hear the realization in his voice that he used burgerking kids club twice in a short span of time. you can almost feel the eloquent part of his brain vomit in disgust

[@Pjaully]

O my god! I have listened to this guy for so long I am starting to think with HIS VOICE every time I am thinking about criticism for something.

[@instantstupor]

Wait...0:45...Yahtzee is actually arguing FOR based titles? I'm unsure what to make of this revelation.

[@SWProductions100]

Regarding Yahtzee's comments on Dragon Age 2's overarching plot: the plot probably could have some tightening, but for me, I actually think that the lack a big bad main villain was actually part of the point - a lot of the characters are jerks, but they all have their own believable motivations and reasons for what they do (mind you though, that probably won't stop you from feeling a strong urge to mortally strange people like Sister Petrice).

[@ENCHANTMEN_]

My main problem with this game is that it is supposed to be a sequel to Origins. It doesn't expand the plot at all, it just takes some loose ends from Origins and mucks about with those with no real payoff or central story. It also introduces a new character with a fixed backstory and race, entirely removing one of the best aspects of Origins. It would work much better as a spin-off game if some sort, with the main series working off of Origins and the Warden. What's the point of having us import a save file if it doesn't let us use the same character?

[@TheBrclear66]

if I remember correctly DA2 was originally going to be the last DLC for origins, setting up the sequel. But then EA told them it should be the new game, so they had to rush it shit out of it

[@ENCHANTMEN_]

+TheBrclear66 That'd explain a lot :) If DA2 was the first game in the franchise, and was the main character in every game thereafter, I'd probably be a huge fan. Either give us Elder Scrolls style character customization for the protagonist or give us a Mass Effect style semi-preset protagonist. Waffling back and forth just makes it harder to get attached to the main character and the NPCs when they are constantly being tossed away and replaced. Fuck DA2's cast, I want to see how characters I know interact with things!

[@Semyas]

It seems more like a prequel to Inquisition, which helps a little. What I found helps a lot is if you just take into account the fact that Varric is telling the tale. Literally: to him, it was a cave. All caves look the same to Varric. Therefore, this cave looks the same as that other cave etc. Still not a fan of DA2, but it at least makes it playable.

[@ENCHANTMEN_]

Semyas I'm mostly just annoyed that they seem to be throwing away the characters I've known each game (including the player character). It starts to feel a little bit odd that every single major adventurer in this universe seems to share appearance (excluding race), gender, personality, skills, and political ideology...

[@smaug2981]

There was one witty dialogue choice that I enjoyed. Aveline: Stop acting like a child Hawke. Hawke (whining): I'm not acting!

[@Murkrust]

Jumping spiders: the game

[@licensedbreaddealer9748]

Hanging out for 2 things this November, Dragon Age Inquisition, and Yahtzee's review of Dragon Age Inquisition.

[@AngryNerdBird]

Some elements of DA2 were actually really good. Character interactions were absolutely fantastic, and the revamped combat system was more fun. Granted, the actual encounter design was dogshit, and having enemies spawn in waves was a horrible idea, but the fighting itself was WAY more than than Origins which kinda plodded awkwardly in every way. All the other major complaints, especially the overused environments, can be chalked up to the game being made in LESS THAN A YEAR. Like, by the time they were doing WItch Hunt they were already basically mostly done wit hDA2 because EA wanted it out before they had proper time tos pend on it. It's ridiculous, really. But what we got in that timeframe was still a pretty solid game,

[@heckalit8818]

Saying that a game was pushed out in a year doesn't make it a valid excuse for it being walrus spunk

[@AngryNerdBird]

Cousin Skeeter Uh, yeah it does? Bioware is just a game studio, not a miracle factory. How many AAA games can you mention that are better quality, that were pushed out that fast?

[@heckalit8818]

Assassins Creed Black Flag

[@AngryNerdBird]

***** To be honest, I found Inquisition really dull. For the first time in an adventure game that lets me play a rogue, I didn't want to play one. (warning, long post ahead) There was never a point where it felt consistently fun to me. I always felt like I was waiting for the awkward MMO-feeling of the game to go away. But, in between the crafting system, along with the massively cluttered inventory system which was a huge step backwards from DA2, along with really monotonous combat centered around an autoattack trigger that you had to hold down at all times (which we really didn't need), that feeling never really went away. In addition to having to manually follow your targets around instead of just clicking on them, and the same goes for looting things as well. I guess they decided they wanted the player to run around more manually just.. because? I remember really enjoying in DA2 how, when I'd click on a target with my rogue Hawke, he'd fucking LEAP at them and shove his daggers in the target's face/back. It was satisfying to watch and felt relevant. Manually walking up to a target and then holding down the autoattack button, only for the target to run out of melee range, forcing me to let go of the attack trigger, manually run after them, then resume holding the trigger, over and over, every single fight? Yeah no, I gave up on that pretty early and rerolled mage. I mean, I HATED the wave encounter design in DA2. Having more guys just show up was super annoying. But, after a while, it stopped being a big deal, and I found that the actual combat system was really fun even if the enemy encounters weren't well designed. Inquisition combat straight-up never became really fun, ever. There were fights that were exciting because they were really important, but the combat itself was never really the strength of it. It was more monotonous and dull than DA:O, honestly. Story wise, though? Inquisition was AMAZING. But game-play wise it was not nearly as fun as DA2.

[@Just4Fun-Zocker]

Goatmon So I'm not the only one who felt that way. Also story progression in DA:I was painfully slow. 20 hours into the game and the story didn't even begin to start.

[@gerikhighwind668]

My biggest issue is how it's supposed to be a fight between Templar and Mages, but your Mage sister starts out loving you, and your Templar brother starts out with a Rivaly, so either way, helping mages is the best way to get both to 100% of their respective starting friendship.

[@jamesvbconnolly]

I love this game. So much fun. I just can't argue with any of that. Guess I just liked the handsome friend.

[@rootsruutu4587]

I'm amazed that some people here actually are defending this shit and enjoyed it. I was so bored playing this, I could not finish it, felt like a chore to me.

[@gronndar]

Justin Farr Amen. I don't want to touch this game, but I guess I must play it once, before starting DA I

[@ATomicAstronaut]

Not everyone is like you. I for one enjoy the game, for what it is at least.

[@XavierXonora]

How to make Dragon Age 2 Enjoyable 1. Play as Female Mage on Casual Difficulty. 2. Get mods to fix shitty hair (And other textures) 3. There's a mod that removes most useless side quest's that just repeat dungeons, and wraps the rewards into the main storyline. the game is alot more enjoyable when you just play the main quest line.

[@DILFDylF]

Is there a mod that lets me have sex with horses?

[@scarocci7333]

or play male hawke and take only snarky answers

[@XavierXonora]

Mr. Big Snake probably

[@XavierXonora]

Xaveric Jr Nah bioware always does female protgonists better

[@gronndar]

Anthony Paull Whats the mod which removes side quests? I'm almost done Awakening and about to move into DA2, but I have no interest. Just wanna play it as quickly as possible and go to DA I.

[@KingSarathos]

:P I really enjoyed DA2. It felt more organic in the sense that the major conflicts seemed to be appearing out of necessity rather than being introduced at the beginning (Skyrim) or having a villain you wouldn't care about at all had the NPC not been courteous enough to remind you of his existence every few seconds (Kingdoms of Amalur). :) That said, I'm freaking excited for Dragon Age: Inquisition.

[@STRING3R]

So it's like Mass Effect 2. Awesome.

[@DeadlyAntenna]

However what really pissed me off was how the game became fussy if you tried to use a health potion more than once within a short time frame, so you'd have to either run away from enemies in pointless circles until you're allowed to drink more health potion, or if it's a teammate that's dying and you're too busy fighting off monsters yourself to switch to them, you can only hope they miraculously avoid taking damage for a few minutes until they can drink health potion again.

[@AccasTheGreat]

This is one of my favourite games ever. I honestly do not know everyone's problem with it.

[@Guanchen]

I like the game, the combat system is smooth itself, sure the enemies now pop out of nowhere but you can't complain about the skill and combat itself too much because it's obviously improved. And game doesn't have to have a single overwriting purpose the entire way though. This is a tale of a person's struggle through life and how he/she raise to the top of the social chain from the bottom.

[@Karagianis]

I get the feeling this game was the a crackdown from EA when they realised one of their developers had managed to slip an original IP game that was actually half decent through under their radar without letting them screw it up enough first.

[@Kenegos1]

@btl2014 I think they were actually just setting the stage for mage vs templar with DA2. The new DA book says that templars have really locked down on mages since Kirkwall, and there's Orlesians breaking into civil war, so it was really just a "this is how all of this happened." sort of game. On the other hand, DA2 focused more on family than saving the world. So unless you got a feel for family and friends in the game, it was a little "...wtf" I guess xD Sorry if this was pointless xD

[@mrs.hopwinkle6034]

I always thought DA2 was about relationships. Family, friends, lovers. That's why it's my favourite of the three.

[@vanyadolly]

Same. There's just something more personable and immersive about a regular guy (with the worst luck ever) who just wants to take care of his family and hang out with his friends and make some gold on the side as opposed to an all-powerful hero out to save the world. Origins is a better game but DA2 is my favourite.

[@darkartsdabbler2407]

+vanyadolly that does not sound like an engaging story... maybe join a pick up basketball game or something, make some real friends

[@philiplindecker6628]

After my first playthrough of Origins I was convinced that it was my favorite game of all time, I've played it through I think 16 times now and it's still my favorite game of all time. Eventually I decided that I'd give Dragon Age 2 a go, and I almost instantly hated it. To be fair, I played it through 3 times, and made some radically different choices, but none of that really seems to matter because pretty much the same thing happens every time with only some minor differences here and there. I think DA2's biggest problem is that BioWare/EA like to pretend it's a sequel, but it isn't. It's a standalone story... maybe a prequel to Inquisition, but even the relationship there is weak at best. I don't even think Origins needed a sequel, it had a perfect ending, and all the characters were nicely wrapped up and given a proper seeing off. If anything I think that Awakening should have been the real DA2, just make it longer, throw in some decent side quests, expand on the story line, give it some romance options, and it would have been even better than Origins. My point is that the only reason DA2 exists was to wring some more money out of franchise for BioWare and EA. I might like it better if some of the choices you made actually had some impact, or if it had a decent villain, or a coherent plot, or if Hawke wasn't so bland. Or especially if it wasn't called Dragon Age 2, call it something else, like Dragon Age: Kirkwall, or Rise of Hawke, or really anything else. One final rant from is how DA2 actually punishes you if you're a fan of Origins like me. Take Merrill for example. Sure, she wasn't a main character in Origins, in fact she was barely in the game in the at all, and only appeared if you played a Dalish. But in Origins she had a stern personality, followed every word the Keeper said, right down to the letter, and was generally concerned with the well being of her clan and all its members. However, in DA2 she is a complete ditz, only concerned with one thing... restoring her mirror. Even if she does romance Hawke, she pretty much just uses him/her as a means to an end and doesn't listen a single word you say... And don't even get me started on Anders! Having said all that, after playing that abomination known as Dragon Age: Inquisition, I now feel that DA2 wasn't really all that bad. But what I really want is another Grey Warden game. And don't any of you dare say that's not really possible! Yes, the story of The Warden is over, like I said, it was nicely wrapped up with Origins and Awakening (not so much Witch Hunt). But does that mean that there could never be another game centered around the Grey Wardens? Hell no! There have been five blights! Make a game where we get to play as Gharahel (I probably misspelled that), or one of the original Wardens during the first blight. I would kill to play one of those games!

[@Briggie]

After this and Mass Effect 3, I am a cautiously optimistic for Inquisition. Can we just pretend Dragon Age 2 never happened?

[@The_Crimson_Fucker]

Nope. As Inquisition is a direct sequel, they'll probably make sure to remind you, in game.

[@Damalycus]

Criomorph I've skipped DA2 after trying it for 10 minutes, and I will never ever play any game from that franchise. They can go fuck themselves. This cannot be redeemed.

[@himynameisbaloghdani]

Criomorph don't worry, Bioware is desperately trying to forget this game EA made them blob together in 5 minutes as well, and the inevitable shitstorm that occurred on their forum after it released.

[@The_Crimson_Fucker]

Personally...I don't really get it. It's not a fantastic game...but it's not a bad one either. Either way, I find it entertaining enough, personally. It's no where near my favorites list but...I don't exactly despise it.

[@himynameisbaloghdani]

Criomorph yeah, and I think everyone could agree that it's a mediocre game, not a terrible one... it's not that it's a bad, but it's that it's bad compared to Origins. Like really bad. And an obvious cash grab. They sold a game half the size of Origins for the same price just for a cash in. And they changed most of what was good about it to "appeal to a wider audience". That's why it's hated. If that's what you meant by "I don't get it"

[@modelmajorpita]

"read the daily mail" well played Yahtzee.

[@shadowthetwisted]

I liked the combat, granted all I used was magic, while my team tanked the enemies with their bodies. Oh, I forgot to mention, I played a female character, and curiosity got the best of me, so I took off all her armor. My God, the amount of time they must have put into her body, I mean, shes fucking perfect as far as her body goes.

[@grendelee]

"Not so much a Heroes journey, as so much as Hero piddles around for a while, gobbing off his handsome friend!" I think they added that to the back of the box! Way to go Yahtzee!

[@insloanwetrust]

It gets pulled of without a hitch? Your sister dies in the cave and it's where you find the magic item that corrupts that bitch who goes power mad and it leads to the shit hitting the fan. Know the damn game man.

[@EliteRocketBear]

Relax man, go back to being a butcher and stop interfering with your daughter's love life.

[@narutorasbat]

She (or he if you choose a mage) lives if you bring Anders along, you could also simply leave them behind on Kirkwall, it's one of the few actual choices with consequences in DA2.

[@insloanwetrust]

Either way the magical item is the whole point of it. You get it in the cave and that's what leads to the corruption and the war.

[@EliteRocketBear]

Craig Sloan Generally Bioware doesn't really diverge to much from it's main storyline. But kind of consistently branches out and converges again, giving the illusion of choice and multiple possibilities, when in reality, there is one main story line, which only at the very end splits off or splits off based on some arbitrary morality meter. That's nothing compared to the Witcher series, which all just keep branching out, barely, if ever, converging back to one point.

[@MannyNamiro]

Craig Sloan Oh, I'm sorry. It's just that I took your comment as a lighthearted remark and not as a legit bitching on a critic for not getting his facts straight. You don't have to flip out about it and be so defensive.

[@KoinzellGaming]

You can always use a lens to look at the details.

[@adampoole948]

I still think this game is far better then DA Origins and DA Awakening... better combat, better graphics, a world that doesn't take a week to travel to your goal, an actual voice for your character and an interesting story.. i got bored really fast with DA Origins and DA Awakening.. but I was hooked on DA 2 and never found it not fun.

[@iDivinity117]

Really? I couldn't stand the game. I feel like it was a decent game and I may have liked it more if it weren't a sequel to one of my favorite games, DAO. At every turn I kept comparing it to Origins and how Origins was better in every way and a lot more fun. And the reason it doens't take a while to get to your goal is because it's just one city. ONE CITY. How did they go from an entire country to a city... It's beyond me.

[@thunderbug8640]

I agree with Red, DA2 was a far worse game, the story was disjointed and had no real threat, DA-O has darkspawn, Oblivion has the Deadric Prince, KOTOR has the Sith, DA2 has. eeerrmmm. well nothing i guess, a crazy templar and a pissed of Qunari do not constitute an Entire game, they should be side quests in another better game. A voice for hawke yes, a voice that dosnt make him sound like a colossal moron no. A single city and one dungeon reused so much i felt like throwing up, and horde or wave combat which is the laziest form of design ever, want to use your tanks to protect your mage well tough shit cos some dudes are gonna just happen to jump down from a wall behind you but its ok cos now the combat is so easy and your mages dance around the staff so it dosnt matter that people with swords are stabbing them Graphics were about the same overall slightly better in some areas but then they should be they only had 1/20th of the environment to make look good but the exploding dudes during combat is an unforgivable sin. DA-O play through 7, DA2 play through 1.

[@himynameisbaloghdani]

well, goody for you. Then you're the type of person EA thinks everyone customer of theirs is. Who thinks thinking shouldn't be part of the combat system, constant button mashing is fun, jumping 2 miles high and hitting your enemy with 2 mile long sword in under 2 second from a 2 miles distance is not ridiculous, and is dumb enough to swallow an obvious cash-grab happily. I'm not trying to be confrontational, or to offend... after all everyone has their preferences, but if a game that was in development for only 1,5 years and subsequently had much less content, dumber combat system, less meta-game.. a game where every ring was called 'ring' and every sword was called 'sword', and every dungeon looked the same, because it was the same... where the environment and texture detail was as basic as it can be, where there was dlc's were purposefully cut out of the game so that EA could swim in a larger pool of cash, where the story serves no purpose other than setting up a sequel,... if all that doesn't offend your intelligence, then you have something lacking in that department. And I say that with no intended insult.

[@luna-csquared480]

Daniel Cofour Or maybe he just likes a game where there's more than just combat going on....what an incredible concept (Oh my!); and I'm certainly not trying to offend. De gustibus non est disputandum.

[@mitchlmitten5874]

0:31 Yup, that's pretty much my thoughts on the entire entertainment industry.

[@Snowflash38]

This is personally my fave game of all time

[@mulza]

Your opinion is wrong.

[@Phe0niz]

mulza You know you fucked up when you somehow have a wrong opinion.

[@DILFDylF]

Eye orlso enjor thart gaim.

[@AngryChamois]

Yahtzee already made a whole bunch of games and still continues to do so. His latest opus came out as recent as March this year.

[@pitch_blaccck]

So does that mean Half-Life 2 was nothing but a cash grab then?

[@jacybrooks8566]

Why do you think people make video games to be nice people, why do you think you work at a job or took a crappy job as a teenager for money!

[@pitch_blaccck]

Jacy Brooks I, don't know if I should even give you a response, but I was just kidding dude.

[@KHMDarkness]

With everything Dragon Age 2 did wrong, there is at least one thing that it did right; the quests. Not where the quests are, but their stories, and how much attention they got. For example, except for the secondary quests (I believe), every quest had a conversation to it, where you actually talk to the person, be it the father of the three sons that went into the Deep Roads, or finding out who killed a husband's wife, or at least try to. The characters act and move, and your party members react (at certain things and times, to be fair). In DA:I, as much as I love that game, most of the questing isn't like that at all. All that happens is the camera zooms in and the two characters just stands there. Even when a companion comments or helps you convince someone of something, the camera doesn't really focus on anything. Because of that, DA:I feels a lot less alive than DA2 does. That, and I prefer the combat in DA2, mainly because we could heal with spells (although with only Hawke, if you play as a mage, or Anders, because apparently the healing spells are picky about who uses them), and because you can actually set how your characters react in certain circumstances. Like you cannot have it set where Iron Bull turns off his Ring of Pain if there are no enemies around anymore, making him waste his stamina, or for a mage character to use the Barrier spell where your allies are in a cluster, and not have it hit only one companion character far off. Other than that, the AI in the game, companion wise, is pretty good at least.

[@amarantine1323]

Hawke isn't suppose to be a hero though. The Hero of Ferelden was meant to be played as a Hero's journey. Hawke was just a survivor of the blight and her/his story plays out more along the lines of "shit happens" from the perspective of a survivor.

[@darkartsdabbler2407]

That doesn't make for a good story

[@kefkaFollower]

"the dungeons start to open franchises" brillant!

[@kombuchas4684]

Still had better companions than Dragon Age Inquisition though. Even got the added benefit of not dying every time you leave them be for one minute because the AI is actually competent. .

[@vanyadolly]

DAI's idiotic AI might not have been such a big deal if they hadn't botched up tactics and the tactical camera, but they did. One of the most frustrating follower combat systems I've ever had the misfortune of experiencing.

[@Malnort]

I'm from Norwich! Omygoodness! I DO MEAN SOMETHING!

[@KeikaStrife]

For once Yahtzee was much nicer to a game than I would have been. Laziest god damned cash grab I've ever seen Bioware shit out...

[@gronndar]

Keika Strife Well said. Still, have to play this once, before going to DAI. I was pleasantly surprised when I saw that Gamefaqs board for DA2 was dead.

[@Mrdaimion]

feel free to hate this game, but it is NOT lazy- given the fact that it only had a year of development time, it's probably the least lazy game that bioware's ever made

[@herofromthedark]

On a different note, I really hope that developers realize that while Dragon Age 2 has some good stuff, there were A LOT of things that need to be improved on. To put this in perspective, consider Ninja Gaiden 3. It sucked. And everyone knows it. So then the guys who made it said "we're sorry," and came out with a slightly less crappy version with several new bells and whistles (Ninja Gaiden 3: Razor's Edge). Just the same, I really hope that Bioware gives us a better version of DA2. I hope.

[@missbexiee]

DA:2 is honestly one of my favorite DA games (with DLCs included and all). Because Anders. :)

[@Retbullgivesyouwings]

missbexiee Fuck Anders.

[@jackforrest3500]

Retbullgivesyouwings A great many people did.

[@Retbullgivesyouwings]

Jack Forrest I meant by stabbing him.

[@jackforrest3500]

Retbullgivesyouwings A great many people did that to. You can kill him after he blows up the church.

[@Retbullgivesyouwings]

Jack Forrest That's what I did.

[@mullent169]

The funny thing is everything he just said in the past five minutes were incredibly accurate.

[@Westheimer836]

After playing this game I felt like I was raped in the dark alley.

[@CaptainBill22]

There needs to be a support group for bad games that make you feel as if you raped in a dark alley.

[@insloanwetrust]

Yeah it was good :)

[@philpyung4831]

Sigvulcanas Call of Duty: Ghosts No matter how much I shower I can't feel clean. And my ass hurts.

[@Robja1982]

Sigvulcanas Oh god who would go to that support group!?

[@Westheimer836]

It's quite an old comment, but I'm gonna fix something... I didn't feel as if I was raped in a dark alley, I felt like I was raped in a copy-paste dungeon.

[@MrMaradok]

If there is one thing I can say for DA2, it's that it's better with the PC (or Mac) version. On the console, you have to chose between six abilities, passive or activated, and thats it. On the Computer version you have numbers 1 through 0 AND some extra empty places that somehow exist that give you around ten or more skills at any given moment. I had nearly EVERY skill I would ever want and still had room for the dog! (came with the download) Not sure if relevant, but I felt it important.

[@UnintellegentDesigns]

DA2 has the problem of being a game you have to play like three times to catch all the bits of used dental floss that make it 'one' game instead of 'three' and most of them revolve around the same people being around for all three. But then DA:I uses the plot of a DLC from DA2 as its ENTIER JUMPING OFF POINT and then makes sure to slap you in the face about it, so... Good thing everyone knows bioware games are really dating sims anyway

[@pratikh]

That last image was beautiful.

[@yesofcoursefriend9763]

I bought this game and the combat was so awful that I had to take three day breaks in-between sessions. Hands-down worst fighting system I've ever seen tied with Ride to Hell: Retribution

[@XsupadumbassX]

Alliteration is not very hard to do, but i'm sure he'll find that flattering none the less.

[@xxNightxTrainxx]

fun fac! there was a working title during development, known then as Dragon Age Exodus, which is fitting cause in one way or another all your companions and yourself are exiles

[@RarestDragon]

It might be that. But since we were talking about puns and funny names I just thought I'd share one of mine. Although, it's already been mentioned in the comments and that's where my cousin got it from.

[@ItsRetroPlanet]

Love how people automatically downvote my comment above. Idiots. But anyway, He's still human. He can enjoy something if he wants. If he thinks high of it, who are we to deny him of his opinion? I listen to both of these guys, Saved alot of money. A LOT.

[@b3rz3rk3r9]

Dragon Age II was enjoyable, and I did enjoy the personal story involved (try going as a mage to feel more involved.) Thing is I agree with Yahtzee about the villain, as DA2 had two main villains with weird setups: One was set up for most of the game, really well-setup, but ended up falling flat in the necessities of caring as he feels like an uninvoled threat; and the villain that appears as the big payoff towards the tension between the mages and Templars, but she ends up feing a little rushed. True that there were hints you'd have to fight her in the end, but she feels so forced in, even when teh fight between you and her makes sense and was set up from the get-go.

[@Neptunequeen42]

This one is actually pretty accurate. However it shouldn't be overlooked that it does set the stage for some interesting ideological stuffs if they ever make a 3.

[@deibee]

the problem with DA 2's story is that you couldn't see where the plot was going. in retrospect, playing DA: I after DA 2 makes all of the seemingly aimless plotthreads come together. I feel DA: Origins was more self contained; if it hadn't gotten a sequel, it would still be a satisfying story. the way DA 2 was written was more along the lines of "let's pray to whoever is listening this goes gangbusters, otherwise I got a big barrel of plot that's going to go bad."

[@recjr7685]

I played as a female mage Hawke, always chose to diplomatic/helpful dialogue options and hooked up with Fenris. Got any jokes for that?

[@BanditDragoon]

i have dragon age II now and oh my word the bugs, mostly in the sense that not one character has all their pieces together. you'll find some of the hell spawn with a face or their arms and even the NPC characters will have pieces missing from time to time. what's more this appears to be completely random. I have a GTX 660 so i doubt is any lack of processing power.

[@UndeadEvilMuffin]

"Freud Freud" gets me everytime XD

[@TheBlu4ever]

I literally laughed out loud at the final spoken sentence.

[@Drowninginantimatter]

2:54 "like they needed to throw in 50% more combat at the last minute." which is exactly why they reused the harvester from the golems of amgarrack dlc for the bs fight with orsino in the end regardless of whether or not he actually had motivation to fight hawke.

[@djlqwerty1]

if yahtzee ever made a video game as in he designed EVERYTHING which is very unlikely it would be... PERFECT

[@ShadowWolfRising]

Sweet Home had a pretty good story (which considering it was a NES Horror RPG based on a Movie, is nothing short of amazing)

[@dankusmemeus7093]

“I have a great sense of dramatic timing.... and good hair.”

[@Placid_Cat]

great review, insightful and entertaining

[@TXFDA]

I know this is a small note in the video, but I gotta say, I actually prefer when a game doesn't have a subtitle. It's a sequel, what's wrong just calling it a sequel? Dragon Age 2, is the 2nd Dragon Age game. That's all that's needed. It makes ordering the games 10x easier, and less of a fuss later on when they make 30 more in the series and start removing the numbers altogether.

[@cergic]

I agree. That's how you describe the game for everyone and yourself anyway. "It's the 2nd/3rd/4th" and so on.

[@HeadStrate]

Dragon Age 2 delivers some of the best character-driven story in an RPG. And the Sarcastic dialogue choice. That button fills Hawke with character, instead of the bland Warden character.

[@DaLatinKnight]

+HeadStrate The Warden character is what YOU make it though

[@HeadStrate]

DaLatinKnight Thanks for replying ;) I think that this approach is good for isometric old school RPGs where all characters are represented without voice acting and a single image as a portrait. Great that you enjoyed DAO, I did too, but I found the mute generic protagonist kinda boring. Great that you get to see your background though, you really see where you're coming from (unlike DAI, btw).

[@DaLatinKnight]

***** Totally agree, it's amazing how Origins can accomplish this without a voice actor

[@HeadStrate]

DaLatinKnight Both really good games, DAI is great too. Looking forward to kicking ass in Tevinter in DA4!

[@DaLatinKnight]

HeadStrate I have not played Trespasser or seen any news, what suggests Tevinter is a new enemy?

[@OomitchTheMop]

I can name way more then three that he's given a positive review for

[@Ously6]

@Dave5 his job is as a critic. His job is finding faults in games. He is under contract to do it. AND he happens to like half-life Assassins creed and the portal series. Watch his review on portal. He literally had nothing bad to say about it.

[@Dumbledoresarmy13]

I feel like Dragon Age II was just an excuse to show off all the pretty re-designs of the different races, which all look really cool. But if someone combined the new designs of Dragon Age II with everything else about Dragon Age Origins, I'd buy that in a heartbeat.