AMY (Zero Punctuation)

[@lehelisbored]

5:07 "Fortunately, he will never breed." Hah hah hahah, if only past Yahtzee knew that future Yahtzee will be a loving dad within only a few years or making this video.

[@0_dearghealach_083]

He does?? Huh. Well, if the kid ever asks about video games, he'd gonna have a lottttt of information!!

[@TheNwahDango]

@@0_dearghealach_083 He's got two

[@iamaunicorn1232]

That Benny Hill glitch needed to be caught on camera. It sounds amazing.

[@Ward1706]

_"Fortunately, he will never breed."_ Um, yeah: about that... EDIT: _"Unfortunately, he has bred."_ From his Dreams review.

[@rufusconnolly8489]

Came here looking for this lol

[@sebastienvondoom8615]

@@leahl5007 Yup

[@mauriciomagalhaes181]

@@sebastienvondoom8615 its a boy or a girl

[@lehelisbored]

@@mauriciomagalhaes181 It's a girl, I think. She might be about two years old by now.

[@mauriciomagalhaes181]

@@lehelisbored oh thank you

[@IVEGOTPEEINMYEYE]

I've spent the last couple days looking for that "bloody and viscous" piss metaphor. Thanks Yahtzee, you memorable fuck.

[@TARINunit9]

Technically it's a simile hashtag-nitpicking

[@theyoutubecommentepidemic5528]

***** If we're nitpicking here, I just have to say, using hashtags makes you look less than credible.

[@TARINunit9]

theyoutubecommentepidemic Which is exactly why I spelled out the word "hashtag"

[@theyoutubecommentepidemic5528]

***** You still represented it in some form though.

[@TARINunit9]

theyoutubecommentepidemic Right, I was mocking it

[@i_just_got_here]

Hi there from the future, Yahtzee just named Amy his 2nd Worst Game of the Decade

[@georgesedov7973]

Also, he breeded

[@ActionPackedJack]

Where is his list? I can only find b/w/b of 2019 and most significant games of the decade.

[@i_just_got_here]

@@ActionPackedJack He lists them at the end of his Games of the Decade video

[@juliantapia1407]

Hi there from the further future! Yahtzee has now Bred after all! All (a little belatedly) welcome new baby Croshaw!!

[@Twinrehz]

@@juliantapia1407 I for one welcome our new Croshaw overlords

[@natej7035]

This will always be my favorite Zero Punctuation episode.

[@CranberryLeGoot]

Same!

[@BaileyCallis]

That Jason joke was fucking gold.

[@Darek_B52]

emphasis on "Fucking"

[@marcelodamm]

4:44 You'd just predicted Getting over it with Bennett Foddy. Congrats!

[@ubervisor9326]

"making your way down a corridor dragging a large steel safe chained to a metal ring around your throat simulator 2014" coming soon

[@eviltigz]

I played it, its fucking amazing. Graphics are a bit dire though...

[@theJOYSofANALpenetration]

Evil Tigz A lot of indie titles like Making Your Way Down a Corridor Dragging a Large Steel Safe Chained to a Metal Ring Around Your Throat Simulator 2014 have shit graphics. I think it's due to money constraints.

[@eviltigz]

The joys of Anal Rape lol Indeed, I hear there is a movie deal to. Can't wait!!!

[@kristkos]

IGN: 10/10 Like Skyrim with steel safes

[@user-zg4gx9zq9b]

From the makers of "Making Your Way Down a Corridor Dragging a Large Steel Safe Chained to a Metal Ring Around Your Throat Simulator 2014" comes a new twist on XBLA games. "Smashing Your Head Into A Septic Tank Until Blood and Shit Runs Down Your Face Into Your Screaming Mouth and Down Your Throat Until You Choke and Puke and it All Comes Out Your Nostrils Simulator 2015." Coming Q2 or Q3 or QWhatever 2015.

[@DissolvedGirl]

"The frame-rate starts chugging like a cottage cheese margarita the second it has to render anything stressful, like *one* zombie in an *empty* corridor." XD

[@ubervisor9326]

1:31 so Lana has to cross the Danger Zone?

[@FischerFilmStudio]

From Top Gun?!?!?

[@IrishJohn101]

+Ubervisor nicely done.

[@ubervisor9326]

+Irish John. thanks, I knew I had something for this.

[@theoneandonlymichaelmccormick]

DANGER ZONE!

[@LostOneOmega]

Nailed it

[@50Calabyte]

I don't think survival horror games should get a pass for terrible controls. Tension in a horror game should come from the atmosphere, not awful controls. If a character isn't doing what I want them to then I'm not going to get scarred I'm going to get annoyed.

[@NickersonGeneral]

Frankly I find myself being forced to be a lot more careful when I'm hampered. Always dreading when I need to switch to melee combat with my ammo dwindling, finally just instead choosing to run away from the monsters rather than fight it head on. It's a personal thing for me, but given a situation when I turn around and a monster is coming after me, it's incredibly less scary when I have a submachine gun with plenty of ammo to take care of it, regardless of what kind of atmosphere is being set up (which is why games I've never found Dead Space or The Suffering really that scary, despite both doing a good job atmosphere wise)

[@suwatsaksri7191]

It works when you can avoid combat and making the enemies just as slow and clunky

[@zyad48]

50Calabyte I agree completely and thats what immersion needs since if you're being hampered you dont feel like you're in the game, you feel like you're playing a game, hell amnesia got it right(with the exception of the sanity meter but I still found that to make me even more scared since other scary things would happen the lower the sanity metter got)

[@happybunnyishappy]

50Calabyte I agree. That's the reason why I couldn't get into Silent Hill.

[@woodlefoof2]

50Calabyte well, it really depends. i mean if i randomly go left when i hit right, thats bad controls, but slightly less responsive controls to the point that it adds to my tension, will actually give it points in my book, however that is a small window and on the other side is a simple annoyance, i mean if you have a foot in it then that is where the pass comes into play,

[@CastledCard]

If Yahtzee tells you that the game is bad, then its bad. If he makes fun of certain aspects of a game, that means its good

[@itsCh4rl1e]

5 years later and its his 2nd worst game of the decade

[@kashawn105]

In his own words he's a "praiser by exception"

[@catiseith]

Ok. This new KZbin comments engine has made the management of old comments as useless as Amy.

[@VanguardFencer]

"Its like Ico with zombies and its brilliant" -IGN Me: Are you fucking high?

[@CoolCatInATopHat]

You know what they say: You can't spell ignorant without IGN.

[@VanguardFencer]

CoolCatInATopHat I still don't get why people trust em. Then again, they are ass kissers of CoD and quite a lot of popular franchises.

[@EcstaticArthur]

VanguardFencer Am I missing something? The game has a 2/10 on IGN.

[@VanguardFencer]

www.ign.com/articles/2011/06/09/e3-2011-amy-is-ico-with-zombies-and-its-totally-brilliant

[@oljo0527]

EcstaticArthur It's the general IGN thing where they do the "10/10: it's ok" thing but in reverse.

[@zyad48]

"if these guys made crysis you'd only be able to play it on the starship enterprise" XDDDDDDDDD

[@Pfisiar22]

the problem with combining action and horror is this: either one side or the other is going to suffer. If you slow the game down for good horror pacing, the action side is going to get dull and boring. If you emphasize the action, then the horror becomes impotent. Action-Horror is a combo that just can't go anywhere.

[@zyad48]

Pfisiar22 to quote who i think is one of the most inconsistent youtubers, EGOraptor "put em in a room together they dont mix!" which really works here, Action-Horror doesnt seem to work at all

[@SpiderandMosquito]

Pfisiar22 Condemned criminal origins would like to say otherwise. It's a game that's horror is Reliant heavily on old-fashioned atmosphere and violence. It's impossible not to have some combat when you're being ganged up by Maniacs which is kind of sort of what happens a lot. It's notable for being a first person action game that is not a shooter yeah they're shooting in it but it actually relies more on melee combat and it is quite empowering without ever undermining the horror elements. It can be slow for the horror and fast for the action but they flow in and out of each other so naturally that it never really interferes with one or the other and since you play as a detective another huge part of the game is investigation there's an ongoing collectathon side quest important for unraveling the story and all in all in famously does keep its player at the edge of their seat even if the game never makes you feel weak or insignificant. My point is it is possible to make an action horror game just very difficult because both genres conflict with each other too much that it's so easy to do exactly what you said.

[@misterbadguy7325]

Resident Evil 4's also a good example - there is action, and there is horror, but it works because the action is made to feel tense and dangerous. It treats you like a very skilled person in a dire situation, where sure, you can mow down an entire village, but you're going to blow through all your ammo in the process and if you make even one mistake you're probably going to get a chainsaw to the jugular.

[@demonintellect9834]

I'd say dead space 1 did pretty well. It had jump scares sure, but the noises and the small corridors made it pretty unnerving.

[@thod8820]

Why doesn't Amy just heal the zombies as they attack her and not have to have a teen soccer mom protecting her.

[@SergioSergio12345]

I remember when I had 5$ on PSN, and I wanted to buy a game So i found this game, and said "Hey this costs 2$, I can buy it" But then I thought "Wait, isn't 2$ a bit too low?" And then I thought, if the game has such a low price, it must have had low sells, and if it had low sells, it could be bad. So I decided to buy Infamous: Festival of Blood instead, which costed 5$ Good thing I was right Because after seeing this review the game seems like a piece of shit Good thing I didn't buy it

[@SergioSergio12345]

***** I know I really fucking know

[@SylarW0lf]

+sergiocast345 You should never use these reviews as a buying point. But for this game? You should definitely use this review as a buying point.

[@SergioSergio12345]

+Dubwolfer Official (Sylar Enderpaws) yeah I check multiple reviews (except IGN, fuck IGN) before I decide to buy

[@SergioSergio12345]

Btw, how ironic, it is my birthday

[@BleedingClear]

+sergiocast345 Happy birthday!

[@CranberryLeGoot]

I watched the ign review and then watched this one, and honestly, this one is more informative.

[@VRArt1]

I broke out laughing at the part when he pushed Amy with the broom and said Kill

[@catiseith]

The saddest thing is that it was designed by Paul Cuisset, the designer of Flashback and Shaq Fu. In second thought, that kinda explains it all.

[@awelcruiz]

*********** **BOOM** ***********

[@zyad48]

ahhhhh! the particle effects!

[@exerberus2316]

OH MY GOD,THAT IS SOME AWESOME EFFECTS

[@gumbiman3350]

I guess Yahtzee also knew about "Bitch, Dumpster".

[@joelb9665]

elisabeth from bioshock infinite is the only useful escort

[@randominternetsurfersurfin7595]

The last of us would like to have a word with you

[@bently13]

Mostafa Shahin Ashley would also like to have a word, once she gets out of hiding that is.

[@blogtoast]

I don't know the "escort" on the street corner was pretty useful

[@someonenow1]

Joel B Amen to that. The line that appears on the screen as you enter the turnstile at the beach “You don't need to protect Elizabeth in combat. She can take care of herself.” I want to take Capcom's, Ubisoft's and Konami's developers and rub their noses in that line, like a dog on the living room carpet.

[@shouryanaik2622]

You might find 'The walking dead' knocking on you door.

[@MrLego3160]

So you can't exit combat, but yahtzee got to the penultimate level by partly running from combat

[@ChaoticHeroGames]

Ha! I knew I wasn't the only one bothered by the heels.

[@SixHod]

It's because the companion cube never complained, it helped you pass many of the puzzles, and in the end you grew to love it because it seemed to be the only thing in an abandoned world that loved you. Your opinion of it grows even more so when you are forced to kill it, bringing about a martyr image that you respect.

[@cybercop0083]

As one of the developers of Amy, I found this review hilarious!!!

[@pokemonmanic3595]

Question: what the hell happened during development that it ended up like this?!

[@Gboy86ify]

5:06 Well that turned out to be a fucking lie.

[@edm240b9]

LANAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!! What!?!?!?!?! ...danger zone...

[@afflatusmiseries]

I once watched a stream of this game in which the game got glitched so that when a certain button was pushed it didn't register and the game was stuck in an infinite loop of "Press the button, Amy!"

[@ryanchurchill5081]

They did do a box with legs as an escort sort of. Portal

[@HappyNBoy]

This is one of the funniest ZP videos. Never played the game, don't plan to, just love so many of the jokes.

[@lupusprobitas]

Congrats on your first spawn, hopefully many more to come :-) (because that's the kind of sadist I am)

[@jasondemonfoot7865]

honestly I hope that this series never dies till I do because if videogame companies actually watched this then they might learn something useful

[@Rycluse]

I'm here to remind myself why Yahtzee hated this game so much, too

[@TheCreepyLantern]

i think this is the video any new viewer should have to start at, it just never lets up on amazing lines and jokes holy shit

[@InvadersMustDie2CR]

Chugging a Cottage cheese margherita does sounds bad.

[@Nickallsopp92]

"At one point during my hubris I got wandered too close to bathroom stall and got stuck in the door now that would've been a cruel twist of fate if I was busting for a piss now wouldn't it?" Hands down the funniest thing i ever heard Ben Yahtzee say. ROFL!!!

[@goodwithastain]

I am now giong to pish in a bottem

[@MrHaloxp3]

I didn't read that in his accent untill i saw "Yahtzee's accent".... that was a week ago... and now EVERYTHING is in his voice!

[@spartandumpster1158]

Hmm, Yahtzee gave me an idea that could either fly to Hawaii or crash and burn! What if a horror game made it so that you don't have 100% control over the character? For example, if you're being stealthy and you aim your gun at a monster but you don't always shoot when you press the shoot button, the main character is scared and only presses on the trigger without squeezing it to shoot! And when you fuck up your stealth, having the gun aimed at a monster could cause the character to panic and shoot even if you wanted to save ammo by getting a headshot instead of a gutshot! Probably would want to upgrade to get rid of that, bit by bit though, take down the percentage of it happening! At least this would be the first time a horror game makes you scared of what won't happen instead of what could happen! Maybe it could do a Metal Gear Solid and you can take pills to calm your nerves, steady your aim, and not fuck up by not shooting! This idea would need to focus on delivery because it'd be easy for this to crash and burn, you need some precise piloting to get this to Hawaii!

[@f1s53r]

That kind of sounds like a game called lifeline, a horror game made by Konami that involved the player telling the main protagonist what to do through voice control. It got mixed reception from what I heard.

[@Sousabird]

Its something that sounds lovely on paper, but it could also become one of the most obnoxious games ever.

[@spartandumpster1158]

Sousabird You could say that about a lot of games! MGS3 Was pretty good with eating but I found the Psyche stuff annoying in MGS4 where I just made snake sit down and look at a playboy for 10 minutes to replenish it!

[@hisho_isa]

No a game that screws you over regardless of how good you are is a BAD idea. No offense

[@spartandumpster1158]

Jonathan Turner Well I thnk it would be like This War of Mine where you need to be observan/

[@Manglet762]

4:32-4:37 I loved that animation.

[@E1craZ4life]

5:06 But there, as it happens, he was wrong.

[@ClawedReaperII]

No words can describe how awesome this review was.

[@adampoole948]

hmmm... based on this review, i've gotten the impression that this game is really, really, really, really bad and that Yahtzee doesn't like it.. am I right? :D

[@FinalStarman95]

It;s fucking fucking fucking fucking bad bad bad bad. Don't Don't Don't Don't play it.

[@adampoole948]

FinalStarman95 sadly i already did buy it and play it when the price dropped to $2 on psn.. it was morbid curiosity

[@zyad48]

Adam Poole "morbid curiosity" like getting sonic 06's DLC, yes believe it or not that shit got DLC, dont bother with it

[@cgunugc]

Your point is a guess. It loftily stands, but jumps at any nearby slight breezes or floating feathers that could knock it down.

[@thod8820]

So it's kinda like RE4 except shite

[@sickweirdo]

The reason the background is always yellow is because this is pure comedic gold. Even games I love to death (not this one trust me) he talks about and I love the video.

[@DeathMessenger1988]

Imagining Yahtzee running back and forth in front of a corpse(that looks suspiciously like the Nostalgia Critic) trying to escape from zombies(that look suspiciously like Uwe Boll and Night Shymalan) does tickle the funny bone! XD

[@dealwitit6563]

At least once every few episodes there's an amazing quote in the video.

[@adampoole948]

amy is crap and i highly recommend everyone tries one of the worst games of the decade.. it's only $3 on PSN now, so why not try it like i did, to see just how legendarily shitty it was..

[@77madman]

Yes, everyone pay money for this terrible game then the makers can see all the money it made and make a squel

[@Vekette]

You obviously haven't heard of The Slaughtering Grounds

[@77madman]

Why do I feel glad that I haven't?

[@adampoole948]

because the game makes Amy look good by comparison lol

[@Vekette]

77madman Because it was an awful mess of a game and then tried to lead a crusade against Jim Fucking Sterling Son because he said mean words about his game and tried to censor all mean words about his game.

[@AndyMcCy]

I never denied that he was trying to make that point. I'm saying he expanded on it and explained his reasons in a constructive and comical way.

[@Y00bi]

Honestly, Ashley from RE4 wasn't actually that bad either. Most of the time you could just hide her somewhere and deal with the baddies, and she didn't get killed instantly, you had a chance to get her back most of the time (If you let a mutated Ganado get to her that was your fault)

[@kellsfreeman8008]

I swear I heard a sound like he got a message on his laptop while recording. One of those "Bwuap!" sounds. Might be going crazy

[@MrBojengles824]

It is the companion everyone dreams of. Silent, moves clearly when you desire it to, and must be destroyed when you're done with it.

[@timebomb4562]

Yahtzee: did that come across it isn't very good me: nope sounded like you were saying it was the best game ever made :D

[@AwesomeSauce1000]

I've had at least 10 of my friends, and 5 of their friends play it. They all were legitimately fearing turning around ever, cause that feeling that "i know he's behind me....but...I gotta turn..."

[@johnnybuttsecks6630]

It never has any annoying dialogue, it never rushes ahead and gets killed, it only moves if you want it to, it never bugs out or glitches, and it's not stapled to you throughout the rest of the game

[@therobotfromirobot]

Yeesh dude, how many thumbnails with a bloody character face do we need?!

[@novantha1]

At least you're not like me, with a seemingly fresh-boiled cup of tea every time a zero punctuation video pops up in my recommended videos list.

[@thatturkey1]

And because you also have direct control of what the companion cube does for you.

[@DankSquid]

iv'e watched so many of his videos that i now think in his voice

[@EPR89]

I knew that game had a purpose in the end. I mean, imagine game reviews if there were no games that could produce something as majestic as this.

[@Thesynapze]

It was with unending horror that I learned recently that Amy's lead developer was the same guy who gave us Flashback... ...and Shaq Fu.

[@IndyStry]

"If these guys made Crysis it would only be playable on Starship Enterprise." XD Epic.

[@zibbitybibbitybop]

Well, that was the hardest I've seen Yahtzee tear a game a new one in a fair while. Good show!

[@HellbirdIV]

Occam's Razor. The simplest explanation is the most likely one - the Companion Cube is just a regular cube with a heart painted on the side, meant to test the test subject's ability to connect to an inanimate object. And there's no joke in there. The Companion Cube test chamber really isn't an escort mission.

[@ICantThinkOfANameB]

Oh Yatzee, I love you and your brutal honesty

[@Dojom1023]

I tip my hat to you, sir, for this fine exchange of opinions.

[@mikigirl18]

XD I watched part of a playthrough of Amy today. I caught where the subtitles often don't match the spoken dialogue and there was one strange instance where Amy was jittering up and down creepily while standing still, and it didn't make things less creepy when she started to spin and jitter.

[@bugsFester]

It kinda makes sense in portal's setting. Look that how aperture science treats science like, it was just like magic. I would not be surprised that they can make cubes out of dead bodies.

[@Walkingfenix]

This is one of my favorite reviews

[@MarkoJoannou]

practise: perform (an activity) or exercise (a skill) repeatedly or regularly in order to acquire, improve or maintain proficiency in it: - Oxford Dictionary The whole "you lost me at..." was about how I couldn't take him seriously after that not about getting confused.

[@Vilverna]

cannot stop doing this now

[@almightyloaf3886]

He is, about as fun as a fortnight in a lake cabin sharing a bunk with a Farseer, a Chaos Lord and a Big Mek.

[@bugsFester]

not only that, Alyx is quite a lovable character, unlike most people Ive seen in video games.

[@Electric0eye]

2:14 among us

[@ChillblaineFilms]

Anyone notice the toilet theme of this episode?

[@DynoStretch]

Ratchet and Clank 1. There's a beach level where a resort worker escorts you to the end and you're the one that needs to survive the monsters while he guides you there. He also can't be killed.

[@Omaru1982]

Companion cube is the best escort, protects you from a particle beam and at the end you get to throw her in the waste recepticle.

[@winnfrazin4069]

***** Just like the hooker I was with last week

[@Mr-Bop]

Well he has a fondness in his heart for horror games and doesn't get scared very easily.

[@AwesomeSauce1000]

It's the fact that you know he's around. The idea he's following you. You KNOW he's there, so it should be fine. But You don't know when he's gonna do something.

[@unorthodoxJ]

I love the current strategy on PSN for Amy right now. They keep fluctuating the price every so often from about $2-3. This combined with the title starting with an A always makes it the first choice available whenever someone looks at the weekly sales going on.

[@MrRaznov]

you're right, that came out wrong. what i meant to say is that in a list of honourable squad-based/AI-based combat star wars:republic commando deserves a mention, as it is in my opinion nearly flawless (in the squad-design and AI). i think it is quite hard to topple the near-perfect balancing of your squad in star wars:republic commando, so i think it could be equal to or better then HL:2 in this aspect

[@640509Hitman]

I think Beyond Good & Evil did it pretty well too. You needed the AI companions to solve puzzles, but they were also competent and helpful in combat.

[@Sir_Kibble]

how could he not sound like Yahtzee? HE'S WATCHING A VIDEO OF YAHTZEE!!! of course he's going to pick up on his way of talking with that lovely delicious voice going off in your ear when you're trying to type...

[@Ashtonyss]

He said his thoughts on the game on Twitter. "Had a look at the Slender alpha. Effective scare, character looked a bit dumb. Not sure how it would work beyond a proof of concept." And furthermore: "Also everyone knows Slenderman is a big old poser and the Tall Man is where it's at, yo"

[@Mafia200100]

This person speaks a great truth. And this makes me sad. Why, oh why, has everyone seemingly just sort of forgotten about Timesplitters? :(

[@shawn576]

This one still makes me laugh my balls off. What a great review.

[@Silenttalker22]

Leaping coat hanger is best frame in this.

[@AgeofAganor]

Because the Companion Cube loves you unconditionally.

[@sparkie1j]

no thats just him reading things to you he stands behind you whispering into your ear and is invisible

[@catiseith]

I wonder why one of the most fun escort missions in a videogame has been the Companion Cube test chamber in Portal.

[@travisretriever7473]

From the future as well, Bioshock infinite is probably the only game that's ever done escort gameplay right. Make them helpful, not essential, but also able to take care of themselves.

[@b4byj3susm4n]

That’s not even escort, considering that there’s no fail state for “losing” Elizabeth and she cannot die in combat.

[@ProblmSolvd]

Ashley was good to... as Yahtzee said "At least she will hide in a bin for half the game" I usually left her in the bin... unless she was wearing a suit of armour, then I could giggle as everyone fell over when trying to pick her up.

[@Dryftburn]

Haha I know, Sands of Time is my favourite game and the fact that he rates it as one of his top ten makes me sooo happy.

[@mchangalot]

As every person should do when playing a game or watching a movie and what yahtzee does is compare what they are playing or viewing with other things they have played or viewed that are as similar to what they are currently doing to form an opinion of it. Preferably you would be comparing to something good or at least like. I trust Yahtzee not because he is always right, but because he has played games that i simply haven't. His ray of comparison is much wider than mine, i haven't played most of the games he has reviewed. But i have played games that he has recommended and i have nit picks of my own with those games. But i still liked them, they were better than most games i just went and got on xbla or steam or flash. There is a reason critics are usually synical. it is because they have had to weigh throw more bullshit than the rest of us and have come to understand the medium better because they have a broad range of exposure to that medium. Their opinion is far more tempered than most, including yahtzee, who has a background of not just playing games but making them, and i'm sure he has consulted on other games. if nothing else he is fun to listen to.

[@seanxprt]

Ah,the only reason i am subscribed The Escapist :D