When Should I Leave a Relationship? | Dr. Lenne’ Hunt

[@desormais22]

This was really helpful even though I’ve already decided earlier this year to end things. Still in process though. I stopped asking these kinds of questions when I came to a place of accepting reality, then asked myself do I want any more of this? Finally said no. Before I came up with all kinds of “excuses” or fears I had for leaving. But I finally came to a place where I truly value myself more than I ever have, and I decided I want no more of this, this is no way to live and thrive in the abundant life God promised for me. And I finally realized He doesn’t hate me or think less of me; the covenant was broken long ago when the other person decided to keep going and even said he’s not gonna change.

[@crystalhamptonhines]

"... but in the moment where your needs are inconvenient for them, in the moment where you share the hurt you feel from their behavior - they stop showing up well." ... that hits hard.

[@drdavidbhawkins]

Yes, thanks for your honesty and for sharing

[@ElleRT19]

This got me hard as well 😢 it’s so heartbreaking to have a good day or two and think ‘ok, maybe they do care and are ready to be here for me now’ and then I try to get my needs met or say how I feel about something that happened only to be turned on in a instant in the most painful way.

[@teresalee9997]

I have to thank you. I dealt with a lot of guilt when I divorced my ex-husband because I couldn't take it. Thank you for explaining what I could not explain to myself. This was very uplifting and I will share it. Many thanks again for this validating video

[@drdavidbhawkins]

Glad you found it helpful and we hope that you have found healing for your heart.

[@teresalee9997]

Yes I did finally find some healing. I got away from the negative influences so I could heal. Society as well as churches have different rules for men and women. I enjoy this channel it has helped me help other women. You guys are awesome. Keep up the good work.

[@SaltLake180]

Everyone who is here, needed to hear this sympathetic, eye opening lecture. It cleared the remaining confusion I had about my 27 year old relationship with the covert narc that I am stuck with. Thank you very much Dr. Hunt

[@drdavidbhawkins]

So glad you found it helpful, thanks for your feedback

[@ESumner]

Mine is at MRC and he has used the mens group to become an even more severe manipulator. His polarity is even more severe and he has shown absolutely no remorse or accountability… aside from what’s being said during the love bombing phase… it just makes the let down and abuse so much worse. He has proven a seared conscience and reprobate mind sadly. It has shattered my heart and I’ve chosen to divorce him and I’m doing everything to forget him now. He is not able to really be rehabilitated. He is sadistic and enjoys harming me, and will do it as often and in as many ways as he can. He is his false self in therapy, though pretending to be humble or forthcoming, he isn’t able to apply what he’s learned to real life. He is a compulsive liar, and lives in denial. He lacks all compassionate and emotional empathy, though very adept at cognitive empathy, making him one of the best salesman you’ll meet. He is a wolf in sheeps clothing. I am so thankful that God delivered me from evil. I would love to be a part of the womens recovery but due to the circumstances I’ve been left in, I cannot afford it at this time. Your channel and all of David’s books are incredibly validating and comforting. Please do make a video about faith and divorce. I struggled with that for years… until now.

[@drdavidbhawkins]

Thank you for sharing your story and glad to hear you are in a better place. It's not that people are not able to be rehabilitated but rather do not wish to be rehabilitated. We pray you get the support and resources you need to heal your heart.

[@elizabethdismukes7614]

I have had the exact experience with my husband. I feel like you wrote exactly what I’ve lived. I would really like to connect with you! Please!!!

[@mosha09]

Sending you hugs! I am glad God delivered you from evil 💖🙏🏼 I feel trapped in my marriage, we are trying to work it out but I feel hopeless and most of the time I just want out. I have always guilt thoughts because we have a baby boy of just 21 months. You are brave and strong, you will get better since you are now in a healthy place!

[@gabriellaneacsukatz8517]

@@elizabethdismukes7614 My exact story No empathy, no change. My husband has turned into a worse person since he started MRC. Uses any opportunity to harm me. So heartless! Accuses me for not fighting for our marriage. Continues to blame me for everything. I had such high hopes that the Mens Core Group would be the answer to my suffering and we can return to a healthy relationship together. He's fuming with anger towards me because I refuse to continue to live in abuse.

[@gabriellaneacsukatz8517]

@@mosha09 for the sake of your peace of mind get out! It's not healthy for your baby to witness such misery. I know it's tough. I don't have any kids with my current husband but there's the attachment that still exists and the hope that maybe??? He might choose to change. Hopeless hope.

[@khrissy255]

Thanks so much Dr Hunt!! I have felt this emotional abuse for a year and a half and waited it out thinking he would change but this is a daily thing and I don’t feel crazy anymore, I don’t feel like I’m the problem like he’s made it out to be anymore. God told me to pack my bags and leave him.. I got as close as packing my bags a year and a half ago but he talked me out of it. I know now this isn’t going to change and I just need to set myself free. I trust in God to lead me in the right direction. Thank you for providing this confirmation🙏🏽

[@drdavidbhawkins]

Glad you are seeking guidance. Truth will lead to clarity which will lead to the courage to act.

[@buckshot0801]

Omg. Nailed it. I struggle with giving up. I need to always remember their data.

[@drdavidbhawkins]

Hope you found this helpful, thanks for your comment

[@grettamaeB]

Thank you so much for this. I appreciate the client centered approach and the thought provoking, neutral questioning technique. It really helped me to be open to the questions and gave me a sense of power in being able to know when to say 'adios' on my own. The back and forth of 'stay--go' within myself and externally in the relationship is wearing me down and making it clear I need some change now.. well ealier than now but asap is next best. It is complicated and I appreciate your gentleness and compassion in your delivery. Also using data to help find "the truth" really got me pumped up and feeling empowered. Great content so grateful to have free and open access 🌄🙏 bless you all and the work you do.

[@katceeee]

Thank you for this validating video. Perfect timing. Sadly, enough is enough.

[@drdavidbhawkins]

Glad you found it helpful and hope you are getting the help and support you need to heal and recover. Please reach out if you would like more info on how we can help. marriagerecoverycenter.com/contact-us/

[@ashleyschuyler1746]

After 7 years of abuse and lying, I just can’t take it anymore. He also has untreated mental illness and substance abuse issues. We have a 6 month old and I have run out of energy for him. I told him that this was it. I wanted a divorce. Now he wants to do marriage counseling and has miraculous changes overnight. He says he’s a different person now. He has seen the light. I don’t know what to think or do.

[@gabriellaneacsukatz8517]

Very tough decision. My husband attends MRC without any change. He's becoming more angry and abusive to me. Absolutely no change. He took his wedding band off three weeks ago as a sign of fighting for our marriage. I have waited three years for him to show up differently. He refuses to change.

[@lizwilson51]

OMG! That's super scary! We are about to sign up for the initial 3 session assessment package and now I'm worried we should back out. I can't find any sites with a large number of reviews, just Yelp with 1 star (3 people) and Google 1 star from 1 person, so I'm worried this center isn't going to be the positive change we need.

[@dorap3087]

36 years and I just can’t do it anymore😢

[@wiebeelisa]

Its indeed a very tough decision, I have given so many chances.

[@drdavidbhawkins]

As Dr. Hunt would say, look at the data to help you make an informed decision

[@Caligirl.8630]

Thank you for articulating what I couldn't in such an eloquent and gentle way. Thank you thank you. This video has abundantly helped me!

[@DARKhorses73]

Wow this gave me some clear understanding. Ill never be priority for my husband. We've used 3 professional counselors and a church. It's time to move on, unfortunately.

[@sakreger1]

This is really good. Thank you for all the questions and ways to evaluate a marriage…very well put!

[@drdavidbhawkins]

Glad you found it helpful. For more related content, subscribe to our channel or sign up for our newsletter to get helpful tips and advice delivered directly to your Inbox: marriagerecoverycenter.com/mailing-list/

[@ImpulsoCreativo9322]

U made it very clear. Thanks so much. Sad but true.

[@cjmils89]

So good. Saved for later as I’m sure I’ll need to revisit. 🙏🏾 Thank you

[@drdavidbhawkins]

Glad you found it helpful. For more related content, subscribe to our channel or sign up for our newsletter to get helpful tips and advice delivered directly to your Inbox: marriagerecoverycenter.com/mailing-list/

[@kristentt]

Such a horrible situation...especially whrn you love them so much, but see that there isn't any willingness to make changes

[@loribaker2036]

❤so very helpful.

[@Andrea-kw3vo]

Thank you. I really needed this understanding of how to process what has been going on. Today he came home from work like nothing ever happened. Yet this morning I had called my doctor’s phone line and spoke with a nurse requesting an increase in my antidepressants (which I have to hide from my Christian husband who didn’t want me on them. I just couldn’t cope anymore, literally crying and crying out to God for help on a daily basis). I’m on constant eggshells because his mood towards me will shift in a blink of an eye and when I least expect it. I have noticed the past couple weeks I am almost constantly in fear now like his anger became more frequent. My mom calls it Dr. Jekyl Mr. Hyde. I learned about love bombing the other day but even in the midst of thinking things were getting better, that he may be changing, when we went out for Valentines Day he took me to a park but wouldn’t allow me to use their restroom so I was uneasy the whole time there and when we went to a movie it was a newly built theater and I whispered how nice the seating looks during the commercial time, not even previews, and he snapped at me in front of other people. So humiliating I wanted to cry.

[@Caligirl.8630]

You need to leave, you are in an emotionally, verbal, and physically abusive relationship. Yes making you hold your pee is physically abusive. That man does not care about you. He sees you as thing to own and not a person.

[@Hebrews111]

This is so painful. It's pretty clear. But I'm a decade from retirement with below poverty income on my own. He's diagnosed in complete kidney failure as I stand for his miracle and freedom of mind. Did i stay in this for all of these years being a servant as Jesus was, putting up with more than most, constantly forgiving, just to lose everything?😭 My needs have never been met or acknowledged - just like how i grew up so i thought that was normal. I'm gentle and always see the best in people. I forgive! God is my witness! Won't He change my spouse's heart for me - his covenant child? 🙏🔥

[@Naan795]

Deep transformation requires a lot, it can be possible but takes work and getting to the right places to her the right tools.

[@drdavidbhawkins]

Agreed! Thanks for your comment

[@purely7762]

Mixed data. Difficult, painful subject. So appreciate Dr. Hunt!

[@janicewills778]

Sadly, I have deliberated these questions for decades and esp the last 10 yrs. Kids are healthy. It’s time for me to be healthy. He came to set the prisoners free. God has been holding open the door and I have remained inside.

[@marieball1772]

It is a big step to make changes after the abuse has gone on for so many years. Abnormal becomes the new normal if we continue without change. Just as the video said damage can be happening to your soil and heart. I hope ypu can begin the journey with Jesus to your own health and healing. May God give you strength as you find renewed peace and hope.

[@ImpulsoCreativo9322]

Its sad, maddening, hurtful. Wasted so many precious years . . .

[@ayinwaafrimpong6131]

What do you do when there kids involved.

[@sissysp8924]

I’m 51 my husband of almost 23 years together is 40. We have 2 kids together daughter 19 son 10. 3 years now Spiritual I waited to say anything to see if he would have his didn’t happen. So I said something I was wrong about everything. It’s always been this way nothing we can do to change it. So stopped trying to tell him anything cause I’m crazy or Bible thumper. Man wrote the Bible his words. He thinks sex and money is everything in life. I’m in menopause now so my sex drive isn’t the same but he is at his peak in life. I asked him so I’m just supposed to turn it on when it’s not there. He says I’m supposed to just turn it off. I said I understand but it has 2 sides. Now he says he doesn’t want pity sex so I’m lost with him. Yes I am cause I never do enough for him or right. I feel like I’m walking on eggshells with him do I do enough or not. I love him but he says just love isn’t enough. In my eyes love is everything. Unconditional love I give but conditional love is what I get from him. Narcissist I believe he is. Thank you for sharing and caring ❤to all

[@hagar3842]

How can I talk with you guys. I live in Australia

[@drdavidbhawkins]

Please reach out to our Client Care Team at [e-mail] and they can give you info on how to set up a free Zoom call with them. Or, click here to schedule your call now and they will call you: bit.ly/3I0dntB

[@Irisgomesjmjfaith]

It's been just one year.😅 Feels like a life time. He lives in his own fantasy world. No concern for anyone other than himself, unfortunately.

[@sanamoyeshnazarova4527]

If Husband is Narssis any hope to this marriage you married two man one side ok one side horrible please help me

[@rebekahjette6304]

❤️

[@liliesofthefield7922]

❤

[@garygerman2685]

Why does everyone always frame the questions as "He"? Can I trust HIM. Is HE safe or not. This is what my Wife uses against me. How can I even finish listening to you when you frame rthe questions in the way she points out that everyone does because its always MY fault? You know, because I'M a man. And thats how men are.

[@suthrnangel218]

I have spent the past 6 years of my life pleasing him only to be trampled on. We have been together 6 years and we have never been out to a restaurant , a movie nor anything else. I did love him but he was living on dating sites. I caught him and he would say he stopped but then, he was right back on them and on other dating sites. His phone is velcroed to him. If I touch it he goes nuts. My husband died 7 years ago and he tells me my husband hated me, he cheated on me and that's why I found him dead in our front yard. He hates my deceased husband. I don’t speak of him, I put Ll his pictures away and nothing satisfies him. My house is on his property. He told me he would sell me this small piece of land but laughed after my house was set up here. My smiles are gone. I am not a person I recognize. I haven't gotten dressed nor went anywhere in 29 days. I have went to counseling and he blames everything on me. We're are not married and never will be. I survived spinal cord cancer and so much more just to meet this devil who uses me for sex and then emotionally and mentally abuses me. He laughs because my daughter won't speak to me and what's left of my family does not have anything to do with me. I grew up with my daddy as my main caretaker and he was my hero. He was an alcoholic but he didn't throw me away. My momma took my brother and sister. They were in perfect health....I was born wirh my heart partially out of my body. The narcissist loves to tell me that I wasn’t wanted when I was born. I don't believe that. I had health problems but I feel my daddy loved me and he took care if me. This narcissist has me in a depression like I never dreamt possible. He calls me filthy names, tells me how stupid I am ,(I was a straightA studentin school) his gaslighting has me questioning myself so I write dowm everything, including birthays and family members names. I have tried to get help but I am not "abused". There are no bruises nor cuts, visible. He is so sweet to everyone but when no one is around, his eyes are coal nlacl, his soul is lack and e en his face takes on a contorted shape. It's all scary. Ask other narcissistic abuse victims and see if they notice physical changes. Most do. I want to run. My double wide house is here, on his land and everything I need and own is in it. I am 61 years old and am on alot of medication due to my heart and cancer but I was doing pretty goog, before him. I have to take my nitroglycerin around him because the chest pains get so severe. One night, an ambulance and hot me because he screamed at me and cursed at me so much that I crawled across the floor and grabbed the phone to call 911. He refused to give me my nitroglycerin. I Pray and pray to just get away with my little puppy. I pray to God constantly to help me. I used to laugh and smile but I haven't laughed nor smiled in 6 years. I am screamed at and questioned if I even look happy.....I just pray for the day to leave because, enough is enough....I've had enough... Thank you for a shoulder....

[@drdavidbhawkins]

Thanks for sharing your story. We hope you find healing and freedom from the abuse. Keep seeking truth and healing. Here are a couple videos on healing that we hope you will find helpful: Hope for Victims of Emotional Abuse kzbin.info/www/bejne/q2q7nISrfbF4gLs Break Free of Emotional Abuse and Heal: kzbin.info/www/bejne/q2q7nISrfbF4gLs