The great Female Custodes freakout | a Warhammer 40k story

Art Credz!
Thumbnail Panicking Custodes by Moots of ‪@astartesanonymous‬ fame! Check them out on
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Thumbnail Princess Custodian by Sarah (@mixuen_chan). Sarah is imo one of the best artists and funniest posters in the community so pls give her a follow!
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Muscle Mommy by Hà My Đinh (mydinh), who also drew some fabulous renditions of female Custodians a few years ago. DID SHE PREDICT THE FUTURE??? Probably.
40k.gallery/ar...
Captain Oblivius of the Adeptus Custodes has made a startling discovery; his trusted second-in-command, Custodian Girlicus, turned out to be a GIRL. WHO COULD HAVE PREDICTED THIS??? Certainly not the good Captain, who must embark on a quest of subterfuge and discovery if he wants to get to the bottom of this retcon of cosmic proportions.
STARRING:
Carole Carolemeyer of the Carole Clan as Custodian Girlicus (everybody say thank you to Carole Carolemeyer of the Carole Clan)
Anna as Patron No. 1 AND Sister Executa (everybody say thank you to Anna)
DreadAnon as everyone else
Honk.mp3 as Goosius
#warhammer40k #adeptuscustodes #spacemarines

[@thanh5703]

"Captain, I am a woman" "A Roman?" "No no. woman"

[@MercurialStatic]

Can we get a 40k comedy ala Life of Brian?

[@BIng-g3d]

*slap* AAAEEH

[@Chikicus]

YES, WE ARE INDIVIDUALS!

[@MeeesterBond17]

"Stwike him most woughly, centuwion!"

[@WackadoodL]

"Captain I'm a woman" *"A roman?"* "No no. woman" *"I'm a man"* "Yes I know, I'm saying I'm a woman" *"What? You're not a moorman?"*

[@bartudundar3193]

A Custodian going "We are the sons of the gooners you could not ban" hit me like a train and I don't feel like I can recover.

[@Flesh_Wizard]

The goon platoon, if you will

[@egillskallagrimson5879]

Is this a dark reference to the goons of the something awful den?

[@AndrewRyan-zv7zb]

@@egillskallagrimson5879 it's referring to losers who just want more tits in their media and don't care how they get there because they aren't playing Warhammer, they're beating off.

[@kyosokutai]

Entirely unrelated. Its new slang for chronic self touchers.

[@zetasann]

@@Flesh_Wizardcream team and the goon platoon

[@emetanti]

The Sisters of Silence can´t even scream about getting sidelined for this.

[@azamonra]

The SoS have been getting side lined since day one. Remember when they had their own Codex and were considered a force in their own right? Then they got rolled into being the Custodies backup bitches. And the Custodies themselves are kind of an afterthought as well. But that's 40K, if you aren't a Space Marines GTFO.

[@nicoruppert4207]

Kinda the reason why they got sidelined

[@Appropriatenamenumbervalid]

they should speak up more then

[@ALookIntoTheEulenspiegel]

They will always have a place as the "over specialized weaker tagalongs that carry items for the real units who are too expensive and valuable to do so". Though truly, their prestige as the Custodes' Robins has been tainted beyond repair, now. After all, what do they have going for them, other than being girls, amirite? /s

[@scarocci7333]

No one cared about the Sister of Silence

[@PanzerLord]

“We’ve all gained a few unsightly pounds and ounces over Sanguinala!” I’m pretty sure it’s just the Shield Captains

[@grunhold]

GW adds Femstodes GW heavily nerfs Custodes in tabletop What did James Workshop mean by this?

[@ThisExists-nr3xz]

Admech was also heavily nerfed, and so were the Dark Angels. It's nothing special.

[@mikd157]

@@ThisExists-nr3xzno but I think that the custodes are literally the worst army right now

[@UncleAsmos2005]

@@ThisExists-nr3xz Wait, the Dark Angels also got hit with nerfs? Seriously, why is everyone focusing so much on this shit drama when we have the Beastmen being gored, and these random ass nerfs?

[@dalekrenegade2596]

​@@UncleAsmos2005 Goobers desperate to resurrect Gamergate.

[@siwygameplay]

It's ez content for boring idpol youtubers​@@UncleAsmos2005

[@kittensofdeath4904]

"look out pornadiktus. you dropped your collection of giantess muscle girl fetish pornography" I'm fuckin dead 🤣

[@carlosfred8673]

He’s just like me fr fr

[@Dispencerhere]

Pornadiktos-the best name in the universe

[@magnusthered3692]

​@@carlosfred8673 same 😢😢😢

[@Miniperfectcell]

WHY IS HE KINDA LIKE ME! I HATE IT!

[@aya61109]

Custodies Pornadiktos sounds like dreadanon doing his impression of John grammaticis

[@sneedclavehere8918]

The plot thickens...

[@DreadAnon]

I was going for Muscle Man from Regular Show 😭

[@kdelfino1767]

I thought it was supposed to be an imitation of Muscle Man from Regular Show.

[@Machiax16]

​@@DreadAnon You know who else goons to tau r34?

[@Dogmelter42]

​@@Machiax16John Grammaticus?

[@avocadotoast6369]

i like that there's absolutely zero hesitation from the captain to call the inquisition when he suspects one of his men to be an unsanctioned mutant.

[@SomeWeirdNinjaToon]

The jokes about the Sisters of Silence are absent in this video, just like their lore XD Genius XD

[@hellenicboi14]

WE ARE THE SONS OF THE GOONERS YOU COULD NOT BAN!

[@TheWarmachine375]

If GW reveal that the Two Missing Primarchs were women, that would mean their brother Leman Russ had wiped them out during the Great Crusade.

[@misanthropicservitorofmars2116]

Sounds like Furry Patriarchy to me

[@lumburgapalooza]

@@misanthropicservitorofmars2116Just an Alpha Dog culling the herd, like a true Bull. _Checkmate._

[@magnusmaximus1415]

Gahahahahahahahaha, you don't know how that joke is true right ?

[@exudeku]

No wonder Malcador is angry at Horus on bringing it up, Daddy Malcador is gay and doesn't want women on his all male family

[@Athetos_Admech]

It would also make one of the primarch's conversations about if he and the other primarchs would get along better if they had been born the emperor's daughters instead of his sons very strange. It doesn't make sense for that to be a question if they have two sisters to compare themselves to.

[@TheNemesis432]

GW: I feel like I'm forgetting something. Femstodes: If you forgot then it wasn't important. Sisters of Silence sit abandanoded under rain alongside Sisters of Battle.

[@UGNAvalon]

_Depressed snaps & claps_ “You said it, Sister…”

[@haventakalou6530]

Just watched tithes, thank goodness this aged poorly.

[@evagineer9165]

@@haventakalou6530all three good representation and retained their badass energies?

[@trevordavis6830]

@@haventakalou6530 Now lets keep our fingers crossed for a Sisters of Silence model refresh/expansion in 11th edition.

[@DreamTraveller1]

@@evagineer9165 SoBs aren't there, don't know if they will be, but the SoSes are, and they have a strong showing.

[@cherrypopscile3385]

"Ill sue you" I have never wanted anything more than to see a court battle between the most heretical looking man in the universe and an actual custodies.

[@paradoxop1660]

The edict of Nikea all over again

[@captaintitus4637]

Ok not gonna lie that would be kinda cool

[@koolunit]

I hope it will be done like all high level proceedings Custodes attend.. With a kickass stringstorm beat and in song 'Greetings, Fabricator General...'

[@sifthead7720]

Uriah olathere vs the emperor

[@MalevolentCherry]

However the entire court will only have custodies as the Judge and the Jury since Heretics don’t get representation in Imperial law

[@lonekirin905]

Oblivius: I don't like you and you don't like me Girlicus: I like you :) Me: Aww

[@SilasKeon]

It's adorable, really.

[@Youaresmall666]

Could be a Futurama reference 😂

[@midgetydeath]

Yeah and that’s why the Emperor didn’t make female Custodes. To prevent that!

[@EllipticalReasoning]

@@UnhingedJessie If you think people are being nice to you to make your life harder, I fear they are not the insufferable ones.

[@ignacioponceladiaz4885]

@@Youaresmall666 No, it's a The Simpsons reference

[@migarsormrapophis2755]

"I'm a female Custodian." "Ha, a likely story." *rips off helmet* "I knew it! Bloody Alpha Legionaires!" "Ah, and I would've gotten away with it too, if it weren't for you meddling caretakers!"

[@Irmarinen]

What's this? A hilarious and new joke in 40k? Here, take my like!

[@jamessalvatore7054]

Perfect

[@justinyu5892]

Captain Oblivius: "So what is your real name? It can't truly be Girlicus." Alpha Legion: "I AM ALPHARIUS"

[@LecherousLizard]

@@justinyu5892 "No, *I* am Alpharius!"

[@ZetsubouGintama]

Kitten: WE HAVE WOMAN CUSTODES!? Fabulous Custodes: WE HAVE A WOMAN IN OUR RANKS!?

[@KossolaxtheForesworn]

"pose with me woman, let us flex our impressive muscles!"

[@PointingFinger]

​@@EcardEcardian Kitten: "But then if you didn't create them my lord, who did?" Big E: "Probably that fuckhead Tzeench who fucked with time again. Did you know that Eldar-human hybrids are a thing?" Kitten: "No my lord, I did not!" Big E: "Exactly. That asshole octopus took away my only chances of having a grandson." Kitten: "I'm... not sure I follow." Big E: "There is a reason I want you to unplug Guilliman's life support. Tzeench showed me the future like the cruel fuckshit he is."

[@veltere5124]

​@@EcardEcardianI can hear this comment.

[@Black.Templar_002]

@@EcardEcardian exactly what i thought of when the news broke

[@rigel9228]

Tbf, there is already a female Custodes in TTS, one of the shadowkeeper terminators has a female voice actor...

[@kevlonk]

Meanwhile, on Ophelia VII... "Hey, anyone notice anything...odd about Sister Brothericus?" "I don't follow." "It's just...I don't know...her deeper voice, her broader build, the facial hair...it seems pretty odd." "I don't see anything odd. Probably your imagination." "Yea, I guess you're right, Sister Oblivia."

[@nathanstruble2177]

I mean, the SoB's have always had some male models in their army, Crusaders, Priests of some number, Death-Cult Assassins, Arco-Flagellants. But yeah, the horizon probably does bring Caiphus Cain as a Battle Sister. All part of his cunnin plan of course

[@ObakeOnna]

Canoness Inquisitia: So, Sister Boyica. If you are this so-called "man", how come you have breasts? Sister Boyica: They are not breasts, they are implanted gel-based shock absorbers. CI: Uh-huh. And these are sanctified by the ecclesiarchy? SM: Of course. Sister Flatchestia has them too. CI: So it proves nothing. And the reason you have no facial hair? SM: I shave every day, of course. CI: Hah. So do I. SM: Wait, you do? CI: Uh, we will not dwell on that. I still see no reason to believe that you are a "man". SM: Well, I do have a dong. CI: You have a dong? SM: Yes. CI: MAY I SEE IT?!

[@marhonic]

lol nah, Wokism doesn’t want equality, They never demand men in media they are under represented, Pure female armies are empowering etc etc

[@flyboymb]

"She does give great massages though. And always volunteers for the purity inspections after the communal bath."

[@aprinnyonbreak1290]

Uh. You'z evuh nowtice dat warboss gurlbaws lookz a bit funny? Eeeh. Now 'dat ya menshun it... acktul-- QUIT MUKKIN ABOUT YA GITZ, IT'Z TIME FER WAAAAAGGHH!

[@quintenbuswell42]

0:41 it’s also “TURNING THE FRIGIN FROGS GAY”

[@VictorIV0310]

Balam Industries sponsored field trip to Terra.

[@DreadAnon]

WALTER LIED CORAL DIED

[@HolyKnight-kh1im]

As sponsored by G1 Michigan

[@dieselmech7340]

I tried so hard to get Balam to win. They just don’t get a good ending the poor sods

[@CrustyCheapster]

AC6 Mentioned. Saying “based:” Effective immediately. Based.

[@acceptablecasualty5319]

​@@DreadAnonHe didn't even lie, he was just paranoid

[@TheBigMkuma]

The fuckin hamster wheel😂

[@Voltamatum]

Where

[@coleabraham4350]

All according to the PLAN YES-YES!

[@srdodojedi3749]

​@@Voltamatum 2:06

[@Availant]

my favorite part

[@VPX-711]

"YOU'RE A WOMAN?!?!???!????!!!!!!!!!"

[@Dude-vq3oe]

3:56 “…What’s a Nazi?” Also, am I only one who thinks Custodian Pornadiktos kinda sounds like Muscle Man from Regular Show?

[@Random15738]

Muscle man would never

[@markhirsch6301]

"You know who else is a female custodes? MY MOM!!!"

[@stoops187]

“Run Eisenhorn! I just gave that heretic $6!!!”

[@lavellelee5734]

I could see that being lore accurate 😂​@@markhirsch6301

[@lost_pmc_3927]

Now I hear it

[@ataraxia7439]

He’s not even a demonic bird just a straigh up goose lmao

[@ThisExists-nr3xz]

*HONK!*

[@MNM-lq9te]

Just as tzeetch planned, a fun scheme!

[@pikadragon2783]

The most demonic of birds, really.

[@Idontevenwanachannel]

You know nothing of geese

[@Sgt_ioiwsl]

“he’s not even a goose, just a straight up goose”

[@dank_smirk2ndchannel200]

"Say, do you think Gooseius' pact with Tzeentch changed anything else about the universe?" Skaven: "Huh, I wonder where-where this Gnawhole leads-takes us…"

[@slagncrag]

oohh if only

[@gayanudugampola8973]

Oh Emperor Oh fuck! Why the fuck are there mutant rats in the hive city?!

[@toastle8005]

YES! FINALLY! EVER SINCE THE FIRST OF THE RULEBOOKS, THERE HAVE *ALWAYS* BEEN SKAVEN IN WARHAMMER 40k

[@chumaktv5386]

That would be universally approved

[@noonenowhere877]

The Skaven already exist in 40K though, they’re called the Imperium of Man and I’m not just saying that cause one of the sanctioned abhuman species are rats. I’m saying that thematically they’re literally the same civilisation.

[@HenriqueLSilva]

"I don't have female custodes" "you have female custodes! It came free with your primaris marines"

[@elliotthaupts8934]

TECH AND MEK CAMEO LETS GOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!

[@Warlord_Gruktak_Rukrak]

Can't wait for their new adventure

[@misanthropicservitorofmars2116]

The fandom has fallen, billions must coom.

[@nananamamana3591]

From the darkest pits of the Warp, Dodge Vandire *laughs*

[@Arnor2207]

The fandom has fallen, billions must print

[@Gloomshimmer]

you mean femdom

[@someneet145]

Unironically.

[@misanthropicservitorofmars2116]

@@someneet145unironically BlackRock gaining majority shares in GW is a good thing! Now we get all these great, naturally included lore changes! Does BlackRock have a DEI agenda? Probably not, best not to think about the policy of a multi national conglomerate. I’m sure they’re doing this with the best intentions 😊

[@LaputanMachad]

What this debacle has really taught me is that Jamethy J Workshop would rather spark another fanbase civil war than write a single additional paragraph of lore for the Sisters of Silence.

[@kittensofdeath4904]

geedubs really does regard the sisters as the redheaded step children of 40k factions

[@XealotCoils]

It's only really a civil war because people are stupid.

[@orfanclub6288]

Them crazies nevah create, only corrupt, starts with female custodes, ends with the emperor being replaced and shit like friendly tyrannyds. If it come to that hopefully you guys archive the lore.

[@XealotCoils]

@@orfanclub6288 please tell me you're being satirical.

[@nobody5333]

They’re making damn sure those sisters stay silent

[@TheLostPrimarch2nd]

Grey Knight: So...... Adeptus Custodes: Shut up. GK: You sure you don't want to talk about it? AC: OH, you silver-plated jackass, shut it. GK: Eh, it's allright. You got infiltrated by Tzeencht shape-changing demons. It can happen to anyone. AC: That's not even the worse part! We had to deal with those..... Those....! GK:......Foot-fetish obsessed.... ? AC: Yes..... The Foot-fetish muscle mummies obsessed porn-addicts. GK: Well, I'm sorry you had a bad week. AC: Thanks.... Think they will do the same to your Chapter? GK: OH, no. If they tried that, Lord Draigo would exit the warp on the wrong side of their intestines.

[@mikecampos1193]

No female Grey Knights it is forbidden.

[@nananamamana3591]

GK: AHHAAAAHAHAHAHA-Ha! HA! Haaahfter that thing with the Sisters of Battle and the blood?! Di-Did you really think-? AHHHHHHHAHAHAHAHAHA! Hah... haaa... No, no not a chance, mate.

[@slkjvlkfsvnlsdfhgdght5447]

is there a "right" side of their intestine?

[@thatplaneguy944]

Have you ever tried a tangerine? Would you like to?

[@TheLostPrimarch2nd]

@@slkjvlkfsvnlsdfhgdght5447 Look, I don't know, and I am too afraid to ask Lord Draigo now. He is eating tangerines. INTENSELY.

[@dank_smirk2ndchannel200]

I'm stealing the term "Venusian Homunculus".

[@LegaLImmigrnt]

"Did you do this for reasons of perversion?" "Honks twice" "Double yes, guilty"

[@eagle10799]

Thank you Carole Carolemeyer of the Carole Clan and Anna for being a golden banana girl and the funny little space girl respectively

[@mahanonbr8002]

Horus tried to warn us, Horus tried to save us... Horus was right all along. Edit:This is the first time a comment of mine gets this much likes. Thank you, Horus!

[@memesofwarhemmer7076]

Horus was the hero we needed but that we didn’t deserve 😢

[@dantereinhardt6911]

THE IMPERIUM HAS GONE WOKE FATHER!

[@noppy8894]

​@@dantereinhardt6911THE RUINOUS POWERS HAVE GIVEN ME A VISION OF THE TERRIFYING FUTURE, ONE THAT SPURRED ME ON TO REBEL

[@jameshailerthepostmaster4389]

I think it's time to say "Praise Erebus"

[@mikhaelgribkov4117]

@@jameshailerthepostmaster4389 no, screw Erebus. No matter what side you're on, Erebus is ass.

[@enraikow6109]

bro had to be neck deep in that colaws literature in order to scribe such an intense and powerful scene with Pornadiktos.

[@oththakom9327]

I would like to nominate the Sisters of Battle for "Chopped Liver of the Year" reward.

[@MrKoffeeKup]

Seriously I though we established the lore already. They just retconned 42 thousand years.

[@Britzoo32]

​@MrKoffeeKup yeah, idk why the custodes have armor, they should be oiled up glistening peak MEN who wear no shirts. Not this golden armored retcon TRASH

[@mycure0498]

@@MrKoffeeKup It’s not really surprising, they did it with Necrons.

[@AmazingAutist]

It would make sense for the daughters of sister of battle to be the female custodians and space marines.

[@woaddragon]

​@@MrKoffeeKup 42,000...instead of 12,000 Right

[@Hivefleet776]

My KZbin crashed as soon as she said she was a woman. I have not watched the rest of the video, but nothing will be as funny as that. I'm sorry Dread. I was almost immediately wrong. The goose got me.

[@Ye-Hu]

It was the machine spirit, bless the Omnissiah.

[@PineapplePinesol]

The goose lives in all of us

[@julianpedersen9167]

Aha, so you're saying that the goose got your goose, then?

[@dandare9055]

"I still don't like You" "Awww :( " I I chocked .

[@MasterChef1957]

5:31 Tzeentch who is behind all of this: "GET THE LAUGH TRACK READY YES!!! YESSS!!! THIS IS S TIER GASLIGHTING!!!"

[@lordsteambath8069]

"YOU MADE IT POLITICAL, FAAAATHEEEER"

[@adarshkamoda9183]

Female Custodians when Custodian Oblivious doubts their existence: "I sleep." Female Custodians when Custodian Pornadiktos mentions them: "Listen, we are not affiliated with that guy."

[@HankHillbrecht]

Silly James Twerkshop, not even knowing their demographic. Dont they know that woman play xenos? If I had a nickel for every woman at my local gameshop who played a xenos army, I'd have enough to buy the custodes battle force box.

[@beauaadams153]

Right same with my locals for 40k and for AoS most play either Orruks or Maggotkin of Nurgle.

[@sebastianprimomija8375]

Women are not the ones agitating for these kinds of changes its pastel colored women.

[@kevlonk]

Quoted for truth. All the girl gamers I know play T'au, Eldar, Chaos Knights, Grey Knights, Tyranids, AdMech, and one also wants to play Necrons. None of them play Sisters.

[@jonthanechols6410]

I made an Imperial Guard kill team for my girlfriend and she didn't want to use it and instead gravitated towards Tyranids lol. I think the most hilarious part about this is that in the very same codex the Custodes are dogshit on the tabletop now, so those prospects of trying to get new people into Custodes isn't gonna work out because just demographically Nids and Orks seem to be the most popular factions for female players. and the fact no one wants to play Custodes in 10th due to how awfully written the codex is lmao. It wouldn't be a day ending with "y" if gw suits aren't incredibly out of touch and in general kinda...stupid.

[@AliceBowie]

Women play nids.

[@mechanicalmariachi1572]

it's the fault of that techpriest and ork in the background i just know it

[@DreadAnon]

🤫

[@cipsahoy9639]

“Come now, Pornadictus” got me hard

[@Valiant1977]

He "got you hard"? 😂😂

[@Lightscribe225]

I remember a post that describes it perfectly: "GW messed up the introduction of Primaris, so they had a very low bar to clear to make Femstodes work. Somehow they tripped on the bar."

[@GhostfireXXV]

Exactly. We are somehow observing GW falling down the same hill twice, it is as much amusing as it is sad

[@jonniedoe8658]

Idk I feel like if primaris had been introduced with 'space marines have always been this tall, btw cawl made a new mark of armor' it would have gone over a lot better.

[@internetzenmaster8952]

Fair assessment. Were people going to be pissed about it because of the needless change [to adapt or die]/Sisters of Silence getting ignored? Yeah. But the fact GW managed to make the Primaris change to the lore look competent by comparison is mind-boggling (seriously, where are the damn models GW?)

[@kittensofdeath4904]

pretty much. James workshop could've appeased everyone by just giving the SoS some much needed attention instead. maybe give the sisters some new models and make them a more active part of the custodes. the bar was so low it was on the floor of satan's wine cellar and james still tripped up.

[@woaddragon]

We might disagree on some things, but I had to admit that a good post.

[@yamato9753]

Damm, Slaanesh really did the impossible... Corrupting a custodian. Pornadiktos really would make a strong demon.

[@Sanguinor_Energy]

many such cases

[@inductivegrunt94]

I like how the Shield-Captain Oblivious was the only one who never knew Girlicus was a girl. His name sure was accurate. His reaction to the revelation was just perfect. And all the banana imagery for the Custodes was great.

[@ajh3461]

Considering that Custodes get longer and longer names after each important deed, I wonder what Oblivicus and Girlicus did to get those as their first names.

[@KantFromEC]

This honestly reminded me so much of ‘If The Emperor Had Text To Speech’ I smiled all the way through it. Thank you.

[@snakething87]

“I KNOW ALL YOU WOMEN WEREN’T HERE YESTERDAY!!!” - Me losing my mind on Twitter

[@Doktor_CC]

I love all these Custodian names. Where's Custodian forgetticus.

[@AndrewRyan-zv7zb]

I forgot

[@DoctorKrain]

Who?

[@Doktor_CC]

@@DoctorKrain I forgot

[@Kohl293]

Sorry what were we talking about?

[@DoctorKrain]

@@Kohl293 Oh were talking about the Squats! Now I remember!

[@tarkatantapir7287]

Terra has been keeping the Sister Custodes hidden so that the Grey Knights don't try to "Anoint their Armor" like they always do

[@redman7775]

With a single sentence, you have given both a better explanation for and more thought into this than GW

[@oscarlove4394]

"where have you been peeing this whole time?" "in my armour, like the rest of us"

[@TheWarmachine375]

Games Workshop must have thought that if Female Stormcast Eternals are okay in Warhammer Age of Sigmar, then it would be neat for them to add Female Custodes in Warhammer 40k.

[@ChillAssTurtle]

You let 1 thing slide in, theyll start fillin your ass with their own shit.

[@DreadAnon]

all them golden folk look the same to me 👴

[@ChillAssTurtle]

I dont like seeing any stormcast without their helmets It makes me uneasy that such a legendary hero would make themselves vulnerable to getting 1 shot

[@Nobody11944]

​@@ChillAssTurtle I mean... Can you say the same thing for space marines. But to be fair, a stormcast dont have that much plot armor.....that and I like them more than the evil indoctrinated child soldier.

[@logangrimnar3800]

No. They did this for reasons other than the lore and sales. It was to appease the DEI religion. Which is not about inclusion, it's about making sure there are no spaces without The Message.

[@TheWarmachine375]

Female Custodes: *exist* Sisters of Silence and Battle: "Are we a joke to you?"

[@stardust4609]

Sisters of Battle and Sisters of Silence are far from fem custodes/space marines though. They're completely different groups with different purposes.

[@ConnorLonergan]

Me: don't know why you think that when I am buying your models as well

[@banks3388]

@@stardust4609 r/wooosh

[@constrainedanacronysm1370]

​@@stardust4609It does take away the spotlight from the Sisters of Silence as being the pre-eminent women in gold in the palace. And like you know it would have nice if instead of taking away an unique aspect of a faction they gave them more lore about how they were expanding and growing as an organization. The Sisters of Silence are kind of desperately trying to recover from being purged from Terra and developing that story line more would have been cool.

[@CasualREDACTED]

​@@stardust4609sweet summer child.

[@TheBigExclusive]

I feel bad for the Sisters of Battle.

[@Silas_Ames]

They'll be the siblings of battle soon

[@Commander_Boreale]

misters of battle

[@yeeyee5057]

Brothers of Confrontation

[@VluggeJapie59]

What do sisters of battle have to do with this?

[@NXTangl]

​@@Silas_AmesThe rules only say no men. Nonstandard genders were never excluded.

[@atpsoldat6108]

OK, but where are the Brothers of Silence? Male and female blanks are a thing, but apparently the male ones become a Culexus?

[@bardssinisterstories2607]

Male Silents would honestly go hard

[@harmonlanager2670]

I’d honestly be okay with Brothers of Silence cause there’s literally no reason to limit it to women.

[@Lorgar64]

​@harmonlanager2670 Because it's nice to have something just-women, like how it's nice to have something all-men. Lends it a bit of character, makes it stand out. Also makes mixed factions like Eldar stand out in their own way. Not everything has to be the same, homogeneous slop.

[@jasperzanovich2504]

Well, most pr9bably die in tge attempt of turning them into culexus, woops.

[@NeonSwaglordChen]

​@@Lorgar64nothing is allowed to stand out, these parasites will change what you love until it's the safest most bland and digestable grey goo and move on

[@Lucat27]

I don't know why the "...you're a what?" after the woman reveal had me rofl, but it did.

[@megablazeiken8977]

bro had never heard of a woman period XD

[@grigoriyremez8851]

Bro knew he was being fucked with

[@jumapl9706]

a what now ?

[@Kawalajin]

I don't think they won any customers with this stunt tho. People are not mad just because there are female Custodes, people are mad because they are afraid that Warhammer may be ruined just like everything else that gone down this path before.

[@BrBetim]

Cmon, DreadAnon, give us Tek and Mek 😔

[@DreadAnon]

"Say the line, Dread!" "...It'll be out when it's out." "YAAAAAAAAAAAAY!"

[@teeth716]

@@DreadAnonyayyyyyyyyyy

[@SilasKeon]

​@@DreadAnonyyyyaaaaaaaayyy!!

[@86pp73]

​@@DreadAnon "...And we like that, we like that a lot."

[@Mortrexable]

yyaaayyyyyyyy

[@daveroe4961]

Suddenly the idea of the Custodians staying out of galactic affairs in order to oil each others' abs actually makes sense.

[@fixitfeilix5051]

missed a great opportunity to replace the handicap sign in the bathroom with a dreadnought

[@nakenmil]

Retcon about the necrons and C'tan: Sleep. Retcon about the 13th Crusade: Sleep Retcon about the Squats and Votann: Sleep Retcon about the Horus Heresy: Sleep Retcon about a woman: WAAAAAAAAAAAGH!!!

[@Sha_Bingus]

All those retcons were shit, if you weren't a mindless consooomer

[@MrViki60]

@@Sha_Bingus cattles can't stop slurping goychow

[@lokhaxz803]

Nice strawman argument, buddy. You make it yourself?

[@nakenmil]

@@lokhaxz803 It's not a strawman if it accurately captures the outrage tourists who only knows warhammer through youtube videos and haven't cracked open a physical codex in their goddamn life and don't have a single army on their shelf.

[@onionhat745]

My favorite Warhammer character is Squidward. There is no canon.

[@Flesh_Wizard]

erm... what the sigma⁉️⁉️

[@misanthropicservitorofmars2116]

Mine is Handsome Squidward.

[@rodsquad5764]

Praise be to Squigmar!

[@thisismyname3928]

[@ForTehNguyen]

There have always been Squidward Custodes

[@OneAndOnlyDave117]

Emperor himself gave us dommy mommies in golden armor and people are rejecting this gift

[@legionxfretensis1010]

Ok Pornadikos

[@kabbablabba4073]

-🤓

[@SheWhoThirstTraps]

I'm autistically obsessed with lore in sci fi fandoms so I wasn't super on board.....but then they made that animation for The Tithes annnnd OH NO SHE'S HOT.

[@khaylis8933]

Everyone remember the birdbrain alert if you need it, we may all need the birdbrain alert in these trying times. (also legitimately one of the few funny jokes/skits/masterworks I have seen about this debacle.)

[@judeblack4360]

The birdbrain alert shall be our Astronomican in this dark new world. When all seems lost, listen closely for the soft "caw caw" that will guide you to safety.

[@malomalovids]

Gaslighting? That isn't real. It's never been real. You're crazy,

[@emetanti]

I know im crazy, but that doesnt mean this isnt crazy either!

[@ondururagittandeska2004]

Crazy? I was Crazy once

[@shroomer3867]

@@ondururagittandeska2004 They locked me in a room, a rubber room

[@Dlpo30]

the fact that this is so good without even understanding probably half of the references, good job

[@HappyNoob17YT]

i love the idea of the Custodes not knowing there were women in their ranks because they rarely remove their armor and barely talk.

[@thewerdna]

Counter point, the lore used to canonically have some running around naked (presumably oiled up like in TTS) Which means we could have oiled up naked buff women too. This is a blessing people, think of the possibilities!

[@captaintitus4637]

Honestly that would make sense considering they did nothing but stand still in the imperial palace for ten thousand years

[@jonthanechols6410]

@@thewerdna Coomer spotted.

[@PodreyJenkin138]

​@@thewerdnacoomer go away come again another day! Preferably far far and stay!

[@thewerdna]

@@PodreyJenkin138 this is the most cringe thing I have heard in at least a week. Especially when it was replying to what was obviously a joke. But I forgot chuds lack humor

[@AshCreeper]

I see Tek and Mek in the bar. A welcome surprise!

[@SupremeMetalOverlord]

Just saw a female as a Custodian. The Imperium of Man has fallen. Millions must be receive the Emperor’s judgement!

[@MNM-lq9te]

Millions? You mean trillions?

[@conorflinn600]

No millions games workshop is bad at numbers and heavily low ball them constantly

[@MNM-lq9te]

@@conorflinn600 well in the imperium of man there are trilions of people or are you talking about a minor part of the imperium?

[@oilimenoruega7836]

As a wise prisoner with a wired colander on his head once said to a radioactive mouse: "No! I told you it's about the money! It's always about the fucking money!"

[@Silas_Ames]

They'll lose more male customers than gain female ones with this stunt, yes it is about the money but not the money DreadAnon insists on. ESG (and likely Amazon) money is way more than an inane increase in female buyerbase could ever make them.

[@thebaron2277]

Chud Horus warned us

[@ocel6037]

3:55 he sounds like a muscle man.

[@reyis_here945]

And then he's just starts calling them CHUDS😂

[@Wesleym134]

My first reaction to this whole thing was basically, "Did GW honestly forget about the Sisters of Silence and the Sisters of Battle again?".

[@vrcommandoata5403]

I still maintain the idea that the female Custodes was just a Sister of Silence pulling a prank.

[@sunrisejackdaw1779]

4:53 are we all skipping over how the good captain is apparently the most butch woman in existence funnier would be that she's the OG and simply didn't comprehend what women actually were

[@AB-bg7os]

The Sisters of Silence are so forgettable that our beloved DreadAnon didnt even include them in the video

[@nathanhernandez8905]

lol the space marine at the end had the footsteps of a cyberman from the 2006 doctor who seasons

[@vashishmanohar4542]

Now i want more adventures with captain oblivious and custodian girlicus. Top 10 meme friendships.

[@EpicDoggo-q7v]

1:18 dude just made a pickleball reference

[@jakedouglas6904]

Custodian Pornadiktos sounds like Muscle Man from Regular Show 😂 🤣 🤣

[@Yormolch]

THIS is the best take on this whole thing so far. Thank you for creating this Dreadanon and you made it pretty wholesome too. :3

[@Yormolch]

@@UnhingedJessie ... No? You don't ignore it, you discuss it. Lore changes are bound to happen in every franchise, because surprise, it's not some magical story brought down from the heavens by a god, but rather written fiction by humans. And as all humans, they are fallible and can create lore, that doesn't sound quite right in hindsight. For instance creating an all male cadre of handcrafted genetic supersoldiers. Why shouldn't there be women in the Adeptus Custodes? In hindsight it is a valid question to ask and it is valid to change the lore around it. There are much larger hiccups with much larger impact in the lore of Warhammer. This whole thing has been blown completely out of proportion, just like Dreadanon said.

[@DreadAnon]

@@UnhingedJessie maybe you should like better things

[@grigoriyremez8851]

@@DreadAnon The list of better things is continually getting shorter these days, in part due to such a mentality

[@Yormolch]

@@grigoriyremez8851 "better" is subjective. While GoT got removed from my "good things" list a while back, the Dune movies filled that hole very nicely. In addition, I have rediscovered my love for MtG Commander and reading Terry Pratchett books. Keep looking, you will find an ever expanding list of good media out there.

[@megadesu69]

@@Yormolch The onus is on you to give a single good reason as to why there *should* be female Custodes. As far as I can tell, there is literally no good reason. The decision was almost certainly taken for ideological reasons and/or to appease a certain loud minority. The fact that it garnered an extreme negative response is actually a good thing when you consider the current climate and the direction that so many franchises have taken in recent years. If people don't staunchly gatekeep the hobby, there is nothing standing in the way of GW execs ruining it completely.

[@ItsRyanHello]

Is pornadiktos a reddit moderator

[@elichhea4355]

Custodian Girlicus rebutting with "I like you" really got me laughing

[@filipzietek5146]

Pornodiktos stance is totally understandable, there are females in 40k but no muscle mommies so it's an important addition

[@ThickToxicSludge]

Brother there ARE muscle mommies in 40k, they are in the guard and are called catachan jungle fighters. The femstodes only took away the little to no spotlight of the Sisters of Silence, who were suposed to be the female counter part of the Custodes

[@filipzietek5146]

@@ThickToxicSludge Catachans are not big enough, imagine if custodette sits on your face and since she is so big that your head accidently slides into her ass, i mean accidently ok? it would be super weired otherwise hahaha

[@lokhaxz803]

God I fucking hate coomers

[@adarshkamoda9183]

Custodian Pornadiktos has historical artefacts I wish to investigate.

[@FiveTen007]

"You know who else is a female?" - Custodian Pornadiktos

[@shigurekago103]

You nailed me with the giant girl muscle fetish! 😂😂😂

[@sigma2586]

Sister of silence:hand* GW where are our brothers then?

[@Francesco-gf1sv]

That would be cool aswell ngl

[@rexalley8397]

Misters of silence

[@varietywiarrior]

​@@Francesco-gf1svIt really wouldn't.

[@kamirikuo8945]

​@@varietywiarrior Why wouldn't it be?

[@hang_kentang6709]

@@rexalley8397 Tacet Bellator Custodia sounds really cool though.

[@BlueGoblin1]

I am prepared to fund an army of Princess custodes for the 3d printers. Frilly dresses, school girl skirts, purses, heels, est. Finally the models will truely reflect the people that adore the faction so much.

[@TheUltimegaMan]

Games Workshop is single-handedly making my stock in 3D printers go up, very cool.

[@TheStargateNerd]

A Custodian would care about gender as much as a Night Lord cares about civilians. They're Custodes, first and only.

[@yungmalaria]

I can only imagine how the TTS pillarmen custodes would react to finding out another custodes was a woman during their group oil sessions.

[@EricT01]

Maybe they are the reason we don't see any.

[@light-wolfred741]

Haha freaking perfect skit 🤣 Now we just need the Brothers of Battle lol

[@jasperzanovich2504]

Wrong equivalent, still.

[@hang_kentang6709]

You mean the Spacemarines?

[@Th0rn5555]

You mean the Astartes?

[@taxllax2104]

It is both funny and sad that in times of turmoil the silly meme man can present the events and opinions of the community better and more subjectively than the actual lore channels. Well done m8

[@aguywithalotofopinions412]

“Goosey conviction” made me chuckle

[@S-G-zm3uu]

Dang i didnt know muscleman became a Custodes

[@beefyblom]

​@louisnall3102MY MOM!!

[@dannyvonwulffen4402]

Why does Pornadiktos sound like a ten-foot, genetically-altered, grimdark version of Muscle Man? Because I just cannot approve it enough.

[@knightinpijamas3166]

this channel is going to explode. love this content

[@dalekwarrior6515]

she was sisters of silence before now she a custodian

[@pablosoleramaeso4561]

My thoughts exactly.

[@AlvorReal]

Fucking tourists.

[@CopeSeethorntin]

I dont know as there was so many different writing avenues GW could have taken but decided to just cop out hard. Though we don't know there creation process we do know there creation is gender neutral and that Fem Custdodes can exist. But we also know quite a bit about how the Custdodes are structured and what makes there ranks to know there has never in the history of there ordor there ever being Fem Custdodes. It isn't vague or unkown as its pretty basic information even within universe or at least basic info between the higher up Custdodes and sisters of Silence. And speaking of the Sister's why doesn't GW Retcon the Sister's from just being normal human women who are blanks to them actually also just like the Custdes Bio engeenred by the Emperor's going through a similar creation process? Why don't we make them Fem Custdodes not just in comparisons but also in creation? And GW could justify this Minore Retcon of the Sister's delebritly having there Null abilities enhanced by being augmented like the Custodes, as the Sister's essentialy being the Emperor's final design/back up plan if mankind's psychic evolution either fails or the warp nearly destroys humanity. Because you gotta remember the Custdodes were created by being the blue print for what the Emperor wanted humanity to become but being supported by there psychic potential. But what if that doesn't work out? What if Humanity is nearly destroyed by either there psychic potential or the warp getting more hungrier and seeking to consume humanity what than? Simple instead of trying to conquer and tame the warp Humanity can simply cut themselves of completely. Even better allow humanity to be able to use the warp but having there souls being inverted in to Nulls to keep there souls safe. Have the Sister's not just be a back up augmented Custdode plan but a literal finale design the Emperor was thinking of utilizing to save humanity from the Warp just incase everything goes A wall for him? Literally making the Sister's more important than them simply just being a bunch of uber eats truck driver's who only exist to keep Big E fed by feeding him little psycher kids. There was so much potential and so many writing opportunities that GW could have done, but decided to up and throw away and ignore because gotta meet that quota from our Twitter lords somehow.

[@Doktor_CC]

Promotion with the option to break the vow of silence!

[@Jfunkey]

Bro just just lit a bondfire bright enough to call for aid from Gondor.