Drinker's Chasers - Indiana Jones 5: It Still Looks Rubbish

[@callumwells]

Honestly, at what point do shareholders and stakeholders look at the poor performance of Lucasfilm since Disney acquired it? This is one of the most mishandled acquisitions in history.

[@DarthMatusHolocron]

Its not mishandled if they are using it to launder money

[@atrane365]

Blackrock. Unlikely the people putting money in know what the company is doing

[@SamtheBravesFan]

The bigger question is what can be done about it.

[@darthbane2669]

That's easy fan simply stop supporting them with your wallet thats what Satan needs to work apoarently.

[@THEremiXFACTOR]

Unfortunately I think they were able to dine out on the box office of The Force Awakens for a long time. That film broke a lot of records, so out of the gate Kennedy and co were smelling of roses. Then Rogue One and The Last Jedi made over a billion, so the money men were able to turn a blind eye and think about the money. Since Episode 9 came out it's all been streaming shows and of course it's much harder to determine the success of those. The thing is (as we know) the sequel trilogy could've been absolutely huge financially and culturally if it had been well made.

[@ty194]

The Indiana Jones saga is a trilogy.

[@zimmy4868]

Absolutely

[@dougrobinson8602]

So is Star Wars, in my opinion.

[@beauwalker9820]

​@@dougrobinson8602 Star Wars is only 6 movies to me.

[@dashx1103]

@@beauwalker9820 Three for me.

[@JayG724]

What’s wrong with crystal skull?

[@kaczan3]

Remember when in Indy 4, Mutt made fun of Indy being old, but then Indy continued to upstage Mutt in every scene, showing us he still has it. Now that we have a chick, she has to upstage him because chicks only identlify themselves my how many guys they step on.

[@JuiKuen]

And not just any chick, but a smug, full on feminist piece of s*** who has no relevance to anyone in the world other than the out of touch elites (and their dipshit followers).

[@Viothon]

I am getting so sick of this stupid horse shit! The only hope we have is that women reject this ideology and start to take to this group.

[@axiss5840]

Imagine making a show where a woman learns something by struggling.

[@Paulafan5]

@@axiss5840 Yeah, it's called Aliens. Ripley has to learn how to use a Pulse Rifle from Hicks. The first time she uses it in battled she struggles with the kickback.

[@redaethel4619]

I mean… this is legitimately old and frail Harrison Ford, it takes no suspension of disbelief to imagine she is more physically capable than he is.

[@ronbarnabei8226]

She’s not just an empowered woman, she perfect in every way and can do amazing things with zero training. I’m so sick of this crap. I miss old school female heroes like Ripley and Sarah Conner.

[@paideia97]

Watch Arcane if you haven't yet, it's a great example of that. It also has a bunch of fantastic characters (male and female) and great writing overall. But yea, I sympathize with you..

[@guntertorfs6486]

Indeed. This is just another occasion for the wise cracking female to mock the supposedly borderline moronic(older) male.What else is new in the media and entertainment world for the last 25 years ?

[@Mquinn8893]

“You stole it. Then you stole it. Then I stole it” reminds me of “They fly now. They fly now. They fly now” crap line.

[@vilefly]

"People die at the fair." 😁

[@JamesRDavenport]

Brought to you by Queen Kaykay and her flea fair of Feminism

[@Chicken_Little_Syndrome]

Who would want to watch an eighty-year old Indiana Jones in a film not written, produced, and directed by Lucas and Spielberg? Why would Disney spend more than $100 million on this terrible idea?

[@enzannometsuke8812]

Try $300m plus $150m for marketing

[@srb2591]

Because they have their marching orders and their government stipend to make this trash

[@Sulaco99]

Because Donald Trump and white men probably

[@derpherp7432]

They must have thought there was a market for it. Which means out of touch Boomer execs in control.

[@SamtheBravesFan]

Laundering money is the only explanation I can think of.

[@seriouslyrelax]

Lucasfilm is so confident of the success of this movie, that they bravely disabled the dislike button.

[@marinawolf]

Before the Crystal Skull, Indy had Short Round. This franchise already had an adventurous, likable, established character, full of wit, humor and guts, who could carry Indy's legacy forward. Ignoring him was a massive mistake.

[@thatonea-hole]

I 100% agree with you. If Indy needed to be replaced, Short Round definitely should continue his legacy!

[@rudegarami6738]

@@thatonea-hole They need to strike while the iron is hot now that he won the Oscar.

[@jaritime1406]

He lived in India and Indiana Jones only had him aound a very short time which is why his not in Radiers or Last Crusaide Mutt tho his SON Mutt?? Short round was in a Prequal

[@connerell8993]

I have the same feeling, he is already established in the films and the character is very likable.

[@danielvandersall6756]

He just won an Oscar. Maybe Disney could give him a call at least.

[@RM_VFX]

Indy saved the world multiple times. What mistakes is she talking about, and what the hell has she done for the world?

[@bartsullivan4866]

Drink coffee and spout "white man bad!!!" "white man bad!!" I can do it better because I am female without any training or experience in the field.

[@alwaysangry2232]

being a woman....thats how KK logic world

[@CreatureOutOfTime]

The only mistake Indiana Jones made is not talking nazis into opening The Ark in Berlin

[@PriestlyBlock67]

The capitalism line alone tells everything about this movie There was a chase scene leaked from the Disney event, phoebe waller bridge essentially leads indy into things, she's flawless and constantly berates him

[@spitfiremark1a768]

Hello. I agree. I cannot watch this trailer and then associate it with Raiders. I cannot make the connection.

[@tomgu2285]

Wait poor people like you who get abused by their authority chef seriously supports capitalism? Damn. Like unironically?

[@CloneSpartan1998]

The Nazis’ were pure Evil and Power driven that didn’t care who they stole from or what they stole as they left nothing behind but ruin and death. Indy stealing an artifact from a literal Nazi is saving a piece of history, and the one woman with the British accent that stole from Indiana Jones, protector of rare antiquities really wants to use the Capitalism argument really!? I still wish it could have been the “Spear of Destiny” with his son, the new shows and movies with terrible stories kill the franchises.

[@The_Mighty_Fiction]

That line doesn't even work. "It's called archaeology" would've still been a shitty line but it at least would've made sense.

[@ReinoldFZ]

I hate that because I cannot relate to somebody flawless. I do mistakes and I would see such a perfect protagonist humiliating me to feel herself better.

[@grandmufftwerkin9037]

They're going to turn the franchise into Lesbiana Jones and the Temple of Poon.

[@leewright1]

Noice.😂

[@ty194]

😂😂😂

[@bruce9742]

That actually sounds interesting

[@popeyeandthejeep7459]

O'h what the hell! I'd watch it. You know, take one for the team?

[@6581punk]

They'll get to every site where there's some treasure and one of the characters will say "you can't appropriate that, that's someone's culture" followed by "The End".

[@warrengouldthorpe5091]

I have a feeling that Indiana Jones 5 will make the fourth film look like a masterpiece

[@mattverish]

Not sure how you came to that conclusion

[@RabbitShirak]

What fourth film?

[@pure-blood17]

@@RabbitShirak …The Crystal Skull

[@AmericanImperium2112]

I actually I don’t think the fourth film is that bad.

[@SamtheBravesFan]

And some insist people should watch it again. Once was enough for me.

[@shadimmir]

They will realize she was the treasure he'd been looking for all along. Oh my god, I'm crying it's so beautiful.

[@Ladykyra101]

Truly. 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@stormryder4305]

You mean a goddaughter?

[@miketruck9197]

😂😂😂😂😂

[@nopenahman7380]

I mean, ffs, the Nazis? AGAIN? You literally can't think of ANYONE ELSE to make the bad guy, besides secret Nazis? Its almost like this movie series, about a Jewish actor playing a Christian archeologist, fighting Nazis from 1936 to 1969, with Jewish hands ALL OVER writing and directing, is perhaps doing some propaganda work alongside shilling pulp trash to nostalgic gentiles.

[@JustTooDamnHonest]

Yeah and that treasure contains a big pile of horseshit.

[@twofacetoo75]

Y'know what the worst thing is? Considering Indy's retirement and his age are clearly going to be big parts of the story, plus the time-travel element... I just bet the message of the story is going to be about why it's important to let go of the past, and move on from the things you used to know, and to stop being a grumpy old man who demands the world stay still for him, because we're young and new and it's our world, etc... ...in the FIFTH film from a series that began in the 1980s.

[@wildmikefilms]

"let the past die. Kill it if you have too" -Some emo dude

[@ourpetsheadsarefallingoff6654]

Yup they tried the same with Star Wars

[@crazyrabbits]

I'm willing to bet that the whole time-travel arc is motivated in the first place by Indy being killed in the modern day, which motivates his goddaughter's quest to go back and "set right what went wrong" by trying to change history. The old version is nowhere to be seen in the flashbacks.

[@brittscott4673]

Yeah I definitely think Indy will want to use the dial to fix or set something right from his past that at the end gives him peace of mind and he can enjoy his old age or something.

[@silk1435]

And the early 80s at that (1981)

[@jp5394]

Crystal Skull isn't a good film at all, but it did have two things I liked: Shia Labouf playing Indy's son as a 50s biker, and the ending, which essentially had Indy "walk into the sunset" but remains himself and serves as a good conclusion to the series.

[@BadgerOff32]

Indiana Jane and The Temple of Womb is such an underrated joke that flies completely under everyones radar

[@kin2955]

You mean themple of womb 😂😂

[@SicketMog]

@@kin2955 Femple...

[@PeakDennisReynolds]

Indiana Jones and the Dial Of A Dementia Diagnosis. Ford used to be a legend but if your already insanely rich and your earning a massive paycheck to star in a 300 million action movie that won't earn it's budget back at 80 fuckin years old and the vast majority of the stuff your character does is gonna be CGI green screen fakery you can fuck right off tbh. Raiders Of The Lost Ark is the greatest action film ever and a big part of that was because he actually did the majority of the stunt work and there is basically no CGI. This looks fuckin diabolical judging from the trailers it's basically a marvel movie.

[@josephdrummond4376]

I giggled and had to rewind and hear it again. It is so good. 😂

[@edgarjacksby1402]

Cause it wasnt good and completely mean spirited.

[@cmd31220]

It's very fitting that the lyrics to Sympathy for the Devil start when Phoebe Waller Bridge's character first appears. Even their own trailer says she's literally Satan

[@dashx1103]

Satan is at least complex and interesting. I don't think PWB could pull off playing Satan.

[@nhmooytis7058]

@@dashx1103 good point 😂

[@pontiusporcius8430]

Underrated comment.

[@abominablesnowman3494]

@@dashx1103 Satan just takes whatever form he needs to. If he only has to fool a complete idiot he doesn't need to be subtle :)

[@grandmufftwerkin9037]

The final Indiana Jones film was The Last Crusade. Last, as in the end.

[@DanCooper404]

And it ended perfectly with them riding off into the sunset. Anything after that is a drunken hallucination.

[@mstevens94]

@@DanCooper404 Or a hellish nightmare.

[@davidcox3076]

We watched the first three movies with the family because the kids hadn't seen them. For some reason I think we'll move on to a different franchise next movie night. I'm not subjecting them to cinematic child abuse.

[@PeakDennisReynolds]

Didn't even like that one tbh. Raiders and Temple are the only good Indiana Jones movies.

[@edgarjacksby1402]

And you still have them. No one's forcing you to watch past that.

[@kyleorr533]

I like the part where Indiana drops the Chalice of Chauvinism and she turns to him, grabs his shoulder and says, ‘Let it go, Indie…’

[@AntiSCO]

Something about the way that music just starts to melt and fall off at the end of that logo bit at the end of the trailer, it just captures the mood perfectly. It's the musical equivalent of "ughhh".

[@grandmufftwerkin9037]

Indiana Jones and the Dialysis of Destiny.

[@RetroRespawn]

Underrated comment

[@Сайтамен]

Of Density

[@varsityathlete9927]

Karenana Jones and Dialing up the Manager.

[@Joisey11]

Or Indiana Jones and the Nursing Home of Infinite Regrets

[@whaguitars]

The prn parody will be Di_l-do of destiny.

[@awfulolaf]

If they wanted to made the Yahtzees the villains again, they could have went the 'they escaped to South America' route and had them looking for some macguffin there to create another reich with a finale being in New Swabia, Antarctica and UFO's and possibly tie it back into Indy 4 . They did the time travel story to 1) be lazy since it worked in Endgame and 2) rewrite PWB as Indy.

[@Jadty]

They can’t do that story because then people would be asking questions about Operation Highjump. They want people to forget that, how in 1946 a whole battalion got their ass kicked by “unknown ships from unknown origin”.

[@kathleenhensley5951]

Absolutely, I'd actually be interested in it some. It's nearly a modern Myth that the Nazis had a secret base in Antarctica ...Add Atlantis to the mix and they might have actually had a decent plot basis.

[@TimPortantno]

"Indiana Jones and the Lost Realm of Agartha"

[@memememe609]

Eh, I don't think Indy would even work again. Ignoring both Temple & Kingdom, which ranged from mediocre to god-awful, the two proper Indy films followed a very specific pattern which replicating a third time would get dull. Also, aliens do NOT work with Indy. Neither do other religions. The whole base of Indiana Jones' good adventures are Christian-based artifacts from either proper sources or extensions such as Arthurian Legend.

[@HomeboyUnholy]

Indiana Jones and the Supreme case of communist enablement

[@marvinthemartian6788]

Honestly, this kind of made me sad. Disney only knows how to destroy anymore. Indy 3 should have been the last one. Knowing when to stop seems a lost art

[@eternalhalloween1]

I don't even want to bother with it. We've had enough icons ruined. Indy has already been degraded in the trailer. I say we just be happy with ROTLA, TOD, and TLC.

[@marvinthemartian6788]

@@eternalhalloween1 I absolutely agree. I bought Indy 4 on dvd and watched it once.

[@Viothon]

@@marvinthemartian6788 Indy 4 came with the blu ray set so that is the only reason I have it.

[@rudegarami6738]

@@eternalhalloween1 I never even bothered with the fourth one and I won’t bother with this one either. The Indy movies were products of the 80s that should be left as such.

[@eternalhalloween1]

@@marvinthemartian6788 Yea. Not to get too much into theology, but C.S. Lewis said that evil is essentially ruined goodness. And we have a concrete example with how Kathleen Kennedy is using Flea Bag to degrade Indy. It's more than upsetting. It's malignant.

[@ironmindvideopodcast9309]

"Indiana Jane and the femple of womb" I genuinely chuckled at that one. Don't think it got the reception it deserved.

[@spod32827]

Yeah it was a goodun

[@edgarjacksby1402]

you're right. it should've gotten less

[@SeanHunterMusic]

This makes me appreciate the Young Indiana Jones chronicles even more. And although Lucas erased the ‘Old’ Indy segments from that show, I’d rather see him as an old cranky guy wearing an eye patch, telling young kids his adventure stories, than have to watch what mess will be.

[@BlackHawk4698]

I just can't believe how bereft of inspirational figures modern US culture is that media companies have to drag out 80 year old men to reprise roles they did 40 years ago in order to attract an audience.

[@TypeLproductions]

It’s crazy how the past decade has had almost no iconic characters spawn out of movies, hell there hasn’t even been any successful franchises at all! The 60’s had Bond, Trek, Planet of the Apes, the 70’s had Star Wars, Rocky, Superman, Halloween, Alien, the 80’s had Indiana Jones, Ghostbusters, Terminator, Rambo, Predator, the 90’s had Jurassic park, Matrix, Men in Black, Scream. Hell even decades before the 60’s they had Godzilla and Kong. Literally ALL of those franchises have been milked to this modern day somehow and it’s crazy. Now Hollywood has run out of stuff to bring back so they’re reaching into the only decade they have left which is the 2000’s and they made a shit Lord of the Rings show and now they’re gonna do the same with Harry Potter immediately after. Not to mentions Fast and the Furious is a 20+ year old series they still continue to bring out even though it’s meme’d to death. Maybe we’ll get some original franchises come soon because we haven’t had any for a LONG time. What did we get in the 2010’s? John Wick? Huger games? C’mon. Sorry for the rant lol

[@Usernumber777]

@@TypeLproductions the world ended in 1999, Welcome matrix

[@rubbishopinions6468]

Yep culture ended in the year 2000. Its the same with music, sure young people will listen to the new stuff in social settings but eventually they discover they like older bands better when on their own.

[@RoberttAvro]

They bring them out again, so they can tear them down and replace them. Come on, it ain't that difficult to see. Look at Luke's final appearances as an example.

[@sidwhiting665]

@@TypeLproductions I blame a lot of it on the advances in CGI. While certainly there have been some amazing moment with CGI (LOTR trilogy as just one example), this has been seen as the "fix all" for mediocre films from around 2000 - 2012... but then movies became so bloated with special effects that the audience was like, "Oh look, here comes another massive CGI army to be destroyed..." So what else have they got now that they forgot how to write and the visual effects no longer "wow" us like they used to? Nothing... so they go back and milk the old stuff.

[@rollandingo760]

Makes me think of that line that Mutt has in Crystal Skull where he asks Indy, "What are you, like, 80?" At the time, it was a funny over exaggeration. Now it's just a fact.

[@jcore0981]

As much as I don't like Crystal Skull, I do really like Shia LaBeouf's character. He was cocky, hot-headed. A little full of himself. But he was also brave, capable, and adventurous. He actually had to go on an arc. And was not upstaging Indiana at basically any point. If he did continue the Indiana Jones legacy, I probably wouldn't have minded that much. This chick just feels like another Rey.

[@whaguitars]

I didn't mind Shia at all. And he's a great actor. Disturbia, The Peanut Butter Falcon those are great performances.

[@marckfabyancic4287]

LeBeouf was playing himself.

[@jcore0981]

@@marckfabyancic4287How so?

[@alexmelling5261]

It was better than him not upstaging Indy, it was Indy upstaging him most times which made light of Mutt's admonishing him for being old and supposedly no longer capable.

[@edgarjacksby1402]

Rey is just as much of a "Mary Sue", as Indy was as much of a flawless character in Raiders. You can't just have that double standard just because she's a different gender.

[@pdzombie1906]

I loved the part when Waller-Bridge breaks the fourth wall and says she's using the dial of destiny to go back and sleep with young Harrison Ford...

[@Steelstriker]

Indiana Jones is special to me. I remember watching the movies with my grandparents when I was 7, always on the edge of my seat and excitedly waiting to see what treasure he was seeking again. When Indy was on, it was always an adventure for the greatest objects known to history. Which is why the dial of Destiny just sounds like a dumb item to go after. Why not have him go after The hammer of Thor or Excaliber whilst fighting cults or even better, young blood archeologists? That would be a better time than some random dial of diarrhea

[@ReinoldFZ]

I cannot avoid to think some troll inserted it in the title, it is so ridiculous xP I will check with the fax of fatality, or something.

[@natie3322]

It would have been nice if we’d seen he had trained a Team of his most talented students of different ages and we’d seen him respected and mentoring them for their Adventures. They could have thrown him a party at his sons house….

[@ericjohnson7234]

that i would pay twice to see

[@johngavin3180]

There is one problem with that premise. It sounds too good and too well written. Most movies today have to have a plot that is held together by rubber bands, office staples, and elmers glue.

[@sallydiver9143]

Very Maverick vibe. That I would of watched

[@johntabler349]

Then send them out for the Spear of Longinus

[@EvilDoresh]

Finally merging indie's two jobs (professor & adventurer)? Sounds too good to happen

[@vjbd2757]

How the hell did this movie cost $300 million?

[@doberski6855]

All the CGI work to make Harrison Ford look younger, and Phoebe Waller-Bridge has secret bank accounts. 🤣

[@chaospacemarine8330]

Bro you seen how much Harrison Ford asks on his checks ?

[@ptonpc]

Lots and lots of reshoots, Script changes etc. Add in the costs of bringing back expensive actors, redoing CGI etc. The general rule of thumb is that marketing costs the same again. So you could be looking at $600 million it needs to make back, so the actual box office numbers have to be even higher.

[@salinium]

Supposedly PWB got 6 million dollars from Amazon to keep her on retainer, not to actually film anything, just to keep her around in case they wanted to make a show with her. I look at that kind of idiotic spending and can easily see where 300 mill went...

[@matthewmorin7016]

Reshoots.

[@didinx8417]

Mads Mikkelsen is a wonderful actor. But he is wasted in these big budget movies. He is at his best in indie movies. I feel sorry for him in these movies. He deserves better. He should have been Oscar nominated for 'Another Round' too and 'The Hunt'.

[@williet.3058]

I've actually seen some of these smaller films, and he was great

[@b.chaline4394]

He should stick to his home country of Denmark, he’s always great in every Danish film he’s in (Drunk, A Royal Affair, The Hunt…) but he’s wasted in Hollywood.

[@james5995]

Hollywood pays best, we know Madds is a talented actor, it's a win win situation.

[@marckfabyancic4287]

Yeah, he's unhappy too, crying all the way to bank where he cashes his checks.

[@kaminsod4077]

​@@marckfabyancic4287 yeah any comment about feeling sorry for actors is so amusing. Almost without exception they're empty headed, egotistical cretins who would step over you if you were dying in front of them.

[@chrislyne377]

That CGI of them falling out of the plane instantly reminded me of Ace Rimmer in Red Dwarf chasing a Nazi out of a plane while surfing an alligator 😂😂

[@interestedobserver587]

Smoke me a kipper

[@brettpierotte2954]

Indiana Jones ended with Henry Sr., Junior, Sallah, and Marcus riding into the sunset. Everything since then has been a nightmare. A horrible, terrible nightmare.

[@The_Burning_Sensation]

I want that early leak about Waller-Bridge's character going back in time and essentially erasing Indiana Jones from existence, and putting herself at the center of all his iconic scenes, to be true so bad. It'd be the perfect summary of Kathleen Kennedy's run as head of Lucasfilm.

[@juniorjames7076]

Waller-Bridge is KK's avatar and muse, thats pretty obvious.

[@silverbackag9790]

It’s fairly apparent that it was true. Enough credible reports and then massive reshoots after test screenings.

[@hope-cat4894]

The narcissism of writing a film like that. She's going kamakaze on these franchises.

[@fattiger6957]

@@juniorjames7076 KK really likes those bland English brunettes.

[@The_Burning_Sensation]

@@fattiger6957 Right? I mean there's undeniably a "type" she keeps inserting as leads, and it's starting to look like something for a psychologist to address.

[@RetroRespawn]

14:00 Jonathan Rhys Davies turning up in this is like what Ned Flanders says to Bart near the end of the Simpsons Movie: "it's good to see you but it's terrible that you're here"

[@thebrewingsailor9172]

Forbes reported about a month ago that the filings from Disney's UK production company for this movie listed the initial production budget at 244.1 M GBP. Forbes then multiplied that by the current exchange rate of 1.2 USD to GBP and came up with a figure of 292 M USD. However, when the money was actually spent in 2021 - early 2022 during principal photography, the exchange rate was much higher. 1.4 USD to GBP. Meaning the actual production budget was 341 M USD. That's before the extensive reshoots and the Global Pints and Ads budget. Add in those and by the time this movie sees a movie screen, they will have spent well north of 500 M USD! We know that the Domestic (US/Canada) box office returns about 52% on average to the studio. International box office about 42%. So, depending on the domestic/foreign split, this movie needs about a Billion dollars just to break even. Indiana Jones and the Knob of Failure.

[@ScouserLegend]

By the time it’s all done and dusted it would need well over a billion to break even

[@thebrewingsailor9172]

@@ScouserLegend Probably, but that's just guessing at what they've spent on reshoots. Based on confirmed numbers that I have available, a Billion is the number.

[@thebrewingsailor9172]

@Donald Donald I concur.

[@martinnevey7258]

What makes me wonder is who is paying for all these "agenda" driven films that hemorrhage money ??......someone is...

[@Ammoniumbicarbonat]

You can't convince me half these Hollywood movies aren't simply money laundering. Making a profit is only a bonus, I reckon.

[@pontiusporcius8430]

The moore bond chase scene razor is talking about is Octopussy, its glorious.

[@blueplanet9917]

Indiana Jones is a GREAT trilogy.

[@Alondro77]

This is why franchises need to be allowed to end. The longer you drag them out, the worse they become. ESPECIALLY today with the woke running Hollowweird.

[@JohnS-il1dr]

Im glad Back to the Future hasnt been r*ped yet. It stopped on the 3rd and should stay that away

[@dougrobinson8602]

Either that, or sell the IP to someone who cares about it and the fan base.

[@fattiger6957]

RIP Terminator, Alien, Highlander, Robocop, every 1980s slasher franchise

[@Vaporvice84]

Stallone making a "do-over" of Rocky 5 with Rocky 6 (and to a lesser extent, the "Creed" movies) might be the only example of a franchise *saving itself* froma bad ending by having a long delayed sequel where the character is too old but proves they've still got it.

[@mrconroy4672]

@@fattiger6957 I am thankful that Friday the 13th ended with the 2009 reboot. Anything nowadays of that would be so godawful woke.

[@stephencartledge7067]

“This scene has been shot 9 times, and once by your father.”

[@1dwkjr]

I think it's really weird how the '80s sci-fi fictional future with neon lights synthwave and cyberpunk has become the actual way the '80s is remembered in pop culture.

[@Vaporvice84]

Nostalgia for a time period that never actually existed lol. Though jokes aside, there was A LOT of neon prominently featured in almost every episode of Miami Vice. So I can see where the root stemmed from.

[@dragonknightleader1]

True. The 80s looked more like Terminator where women had big hair, men had mullets, and there was trash everywhere.

[@kri249]

When in reality it was the opposite. Everything still maintained the remnants of the 70s and TV was mostly re-runs of old shows and movies from even later, sometimes in black and white. And adults were nostalgic for the 50s.

[@renatoe9648]

the actual future turned up to be kinda disapointing

[@no3scap3117]

True, when I think of the 80s I think of wood panel walls, ugly sofas, and ashtrays

[@SirEtrigan]

There was an interview from a couple of years ago with Shia LaBeouf where he explained the terms of his contract with Crystal Skull and any further productions was that he was the new 50s Indy going forwards, but then Kennedy and her Wrecking Krew of feminizes came in and said *absolutely not the next Indy will be a stronk in-powered wamons* and he wished he would have sued for breach but was told no one would help him to do that within the industry against Kennedy's iron fist rule. It's definitely since been memory holed, can't even find a scrap of it on any streaming services.

[@thehunzz]

Desantis is an attorney.

[@apollolux]

Every time I watch a video of peeps reviewing the trailer, when Helena says the line "Take chances, make mistakes" I half expect Miss Frizzle from The Magic School Bus to finish with "Get messy!" XD

[@nicholastotoro7721]

I absolutely love the contrast between the methods of TLP and Razor. TLP is completely pragmatic and lays out his view eloquently, Razor is total nuclear strike… 🤣

[@globesurfer122]

Razor awkwardly criticizing the civil rights movement to prove that the 60s were worse than the 30s was so cringe

[@berendharmsen]

Was Razor the discount Critical Drinker 'look I have sunglasses too' wannabe, but without any of the depth, wit or, indeed, eloquence?

[@stimpy_thecat]

Razor is waaay overrated. A two-bit opinion-shouter who uses his angry schtick to hide the fact he really doesn't say anything that isn't pedestrian af.

[@Powermad-bu4em]

@@berendharmsen Razor has been wearing the shades looong before Drinker.

[@doublep1980]

@@berendharmsen Yes, he's the guy who thinks that Aliens is ''not a great movie'' and that Eli Roth's crappy remake of ''Death Wish'', starring a sleepwalking Bruce Willis and that NOBODY watched or remembered, is a ''better action flick'' than John Wick. He also thinks that Stryper, the cringey 80's christian metal band is one of the greatest metal bands eva and that The Witcher is a rip-off of Elric, because both characters have white long hair, carrying a sword and wandering around in a dark fantasy world. He's an edgelord, try-hard imbecile.

[@M-S_4321]

As someone born in the late 60s, as a small child I was learning how•to•think and growing older observing the 'free love' teenagers around me caused me to hate them.

[@phonepunk7888]

Nowadays it should be extremely clear that the 60s free love movement was mostly a media creation. Just like BLM and the gay stuff today. Don't forget all the Harvard professors running around spreading drugs telling kids to "drop out" of society. A lot of the stuff we are dealing with now was started in the 60s.

[@rickjohnson9558]

Born in 1963 in the Bay Area and I truly loathed long-hairs. Dirty smelly mean people. And I still do!

[@ANobodyatall]

Now, the ex-hippies run the show. Look how that turned out!

[@ajsouza3720]

As someone born in the 90s, I got to inherit the dystopia that the free love retards created

[@harbl99]

"The hippy generation were all anti-war until they personally aged out of the draft. As soon as that happened, they never found a war they didn't like." -- Gen X army friend

[@TheWarmachine375]

Indiana Jones franchise should have ended at 3rd film. Change my mind.

[@Chicken_Little_Syndrome]

Back in the late 1980s or so Lucas had a Young Indiana Jones TV show. This would have been the way to go. They could have saved a ton of money while creating a new Disney+ series.

[@universiTy_YT_]

@VinceLumontad no, I don't think I will

[@generalgk]

That’s literally the safest opinion in the history of opinions

[@stevenjackson3906]

Indiana Jones and Star Wars both. Should have just made the original trilogies and everything that came before or after should've either be left to the imagination or depicted in a comic book series.

[@kirgan1000]

There was a 4rd film that was never done Fate of Atlantis.

[@brad3139]

more excited for your guys' reviews for this than the actual movie.

[@ElementsUnknown]

Octopussy is the Bond film RF is thinking of. Great flick with a legendary title.

[@TheGodOfGravy]

Remember when the last one had a decent scene about Indy being older and lamenting that fact because his friends and family were gone because he had outlived them all? Remember when there was that one insulting person who mentioned Indy’s age in the last one? Remember who it was actually justified as something the film needed to acknowledge so they had the immature character make a flippant comment? Remember when they cared about respecting the established character by having the insults coming from the insulting characters rather than directly from the director and producers?

[@kaczan3]

And then Indy proceeded to upstage Mutt to show us that yes, he still has it.

[@TheGodOfGravy]

@@kaczan3 Exactly. That movie was crappy because the plot was terrible, there was too many characters and A FUCKING ALIEN?! but it actually treated Indy himself pretty well, all things considered.

[@Linkman247]

​@@TheGodOfGravy for the time period crystal skull was set in and the background of the actual crystal skull? The premise wasn't that bad. I do think there was an over reliance on CGI but I would say the CGI was better than the marvel stuff we get today

[@TheGodOfGravy]

@@Linkman247 Too much CGI was definitely a problem. Unnecessary too because a lot of it looks fine but is pointless. The prairie dogs is a perfect example. Why are they in the movie? The central premise is… a choice. Aliens is always going to be difficult for an Indy film but it could’ve been accepted if the rest of the film was excellent. However, everything else feels undercooked. Too many characters, to the point where a lot of them just stand around. Not enough grittiness which isn’t helped by the overuse of CGI. There’s maybe only 5 onscreen deaths and they’re all CGI related. Yes, they are horrible ways to die but you usually save the spectacle death till the end as the most horrific of them so that it really hits as a shocking death. It’s like the film just goes through the motions and never really really treats the acknowledgment of life on other planets as a big deal when really it should be the biggest discovery of all time.

[@archstanton9073]

@@TheGodOfGravy The aliens were from a different dimension not another planet.

[@derekmcmanus8615]

Some say there are only 3 Indiana Jones movies 🤔

[@MrPGC137]

There are. There's the 3 movies...and then there's the free coaster that comes with the DVD set, that you set your coffee-mug on.

[@6581punk]

There's two, 1 and 3.

[@grandmufftwerkin9037]

It ended at The Last Crusade. Last, as in the end.

[@darthkek1953]

2 was boss with Thuggee villains

[@Alondro77]

WELL THOSE PEOPLE ARE CLEARLY RACISYSTS AND ISTOPHOBIC TRANSPHOBES WHO ARE INSURRRRRRRECTIONISTS REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!! (So salty.....) 😁

[@RSG_TheMonster]

The capitalism line (possibly) ruined any hope I had on this movie!

[@grandmufftwerkin9037]

What? You don't like it when multi-million dollar movies, made by multi-billion dollar corporations, and featuring millionaire actors, tell you that capitalism baaaad? 🙃

[@dragonforks93]

Corporate hollywood refuses to let beloved franchise die to squeeze every last drop of nostalgia money from it. "Capitalism is bad m'kay"

[@Сайтамен]

​@@dragonforks93 "See, that's why our movies suck - to prove the point!"

[@Leeds71]

Fits quite well in with the pseudo marxist ideology they spout - capitalism is bad 'well for you plebs it is' but we love it and will embrace it. Roughly translated more for us, less for you and be happy - idiots.

[@manoz6194]

Capitalism and Communism are both sides of the same coin, same tribe behind Communism controls Hollywood and pretty much every major institution.

[@whiskeycorridor90]

Shia Lebouf as Indy Jr. sounds pretty good right now tbh.

[@baddecision4229]

RIP Indiana Jones franchise, It was fun while it lasted

[@planetbob6703]

It honestly feels like KK is intentionally trying to undo her predecessors work. Considering the rumors of her input being ignored when the movies were made it's probably along the lines of: "Your stuff sucks! I'm now going to make it the way it always should have been!" And when there's backlash from fans it hurts her pride, causing her to double down.

[@Vaporvice84]

Some years ago, Mike from Red Letter Media made a passing joke about how KK is getting revenge fro all the years she had to get Speilberg his coffee lol.

[@mrconroy4672]

Wonder where KK will go next after she's done with this. My guess is that she will likely ruin other hollywood properties.

[@crazyrabbits]

@@mrconroy4672 If it's anything like Tom Rothman, they'll give her a cushy job at another production house, and she can continue her "legacy" unabated.

[@purefoldnz3070]

from Harrisons age it should be set in 1979. Would have got to see Indy in the Disco era.

[@mstevens94]

With capable and not agenda-driven executives and writers, that could be an Indiana Jones film, where Indy has retired from teaching but still has that itch to go on that one last adventure. Maybe bring along Mutt, his biological son, who has learned the ropes of doing his own thing with experiences by the time of the setting, making him a competent heir to continue Indy's work, where he actually earns the hat Indy wears and his respect, like Indy had to do with his father in Last Crusade. But ultimately, this series ended with the Last Crusade. I would take this kind of story over Phoebe Waller-Bridge's self-insert, trying to upstage an 80+-year-old Indy in his own film, good job, you upstage a man far from his prime and probably riddled with arthritis, probably senile, if not more tired, to push Indiana Jane to replace him; so inspiring, so brave. Clearly, the writers at LucasFilm thought this through. 😏😂

[@whaguitars]

Yeah will a scene from the Naked Gun where OJ has that giant afro and Frank has huge side burns kzbin.info/www/bejne/f6G9fJVtiNqZetk

[@archstanton9073]

@@mstevens94 Harrison Ford is still with it. Check out Shrinking. He's actually good in that.

[@Kendro311]

I miss the days when you had to be attractive, talented or charismatic before they'd point a camera at you. I could look at my big toe and then at Waller-Bridge and feel the same. Although I'd miss my big toe if it wasn't there.

[@hv3115]

Yeah i don't know why Hollywood keeps trying to make Phoebe Waller-Bridge a thing. Especially on- screen. She has the face of an English pudding.

[@andystegall7407]

She has the correct politics and she will bludgeon you over the head with them as hard as she can. That's why she gets work

[@frankspeakmore7104]

@@hv3115 And the jaw line of a horse.

[@jwt-nu3ei]

She wrote a play (Fleabag) which became a TV show which resonated with a particular crowd of upper middle class, Russell Group metropolitan types (predominantly women), who are largely over represented in media circles. Cue silly amounts of hype.

[@nhmooytis7058]

@@frankspeakmore7104 Maybe Indy’s her godfather but she looks like her real father was MR ED.

[@cuff2860]

I actually got in an argument over returning artifacts to cultures once. The library of Alexandria was a hub of knowledge and fact in the ancient world and when it burned, we lost thousands of years of history. The same thing occurred in large parts with WW1 and 2 when hundreds of museums, libraries and architecture were destroyed. By consolidating history in one single area, you risk the destruction of that culture should the worst happen (whether natural or man-made). Such consolidation also limits next generations from experiencing it in person vs seeing a picture in a textbook. There is more benefit to sharing in museums than harboring treasures where only the locals and tourists can see it.

[@Sorain1]

Same applies to concentrating too much of one culture/era in any one geographic location. Too many eggs in a single basket. Spread them around, rotate them around, more to see and experience, lower damage when something happens. (Because given sufficient time, something will happen.)

[@JamesRDavenport]

Except that the Library of Alexandria one is kind of a myth. When one uses that term, which library are we talking about? There was more than one, even in ancient Ptolemaic times. And all the knowledge of the ancient world was never stored in just one place. Whatever scrolls were found on ships coming into port, they made copies of and those copies were returned to the ship while the originals were retained in Alexandria, the information wasn't lost. Even the famous Museum of Alexandria wasn't really a cache of artifacts it was more like a think tank. The fire oft cited as evil Christian bigots destroying all knowledge of the ancient world in Alexandria is highly exaggerated. It's debatable if they had any scrolls at all by then, or if it was just a waning pagan shrine. Not that any deaths in that incident are justified, just that it's morphed into a kind of neo-atheist myth, perpetuated by agenda films like Agora. Bottomline, preservation of knowledge isn't a bad thing. Western civilization is right to do so.

[@pcal2901]

Indy 5 is out in cinemas this week...."Marion don't look at it!!! Shut your eyes Marion. Don't look at it, no matter what happens!!" 😂

[@grandmufftwerkin9037]

Critical Drinker! MauLer! RazorFist! The Little Platoon! Critical Doggo! By their powers combined, we are an entertained audience!

[@CAP198462]

Their mirrored sunglasses are tooo strong, we cannot resist.

[@sergiogonzalesYT]

LOL

[@GeoffryGifari]

".... if it weren't for you meddling kids and your drunken dog!"

[@Furiafelina]

💪👏👍

[@felchthesmegcomedy278]

More Razorfist!

[@GIBBO4182]

Like The Marvels, this film has had so many reshoots and postponements I’m guessing it’s going to be a train wreck

[@DavidRexGlenn]

Good to see the Critical Doggo joining in on the discussion

[@onethdasanayake3689]

Him sleeping through it makes it much better

[@Akm72]

Critical Doggo has made sure his butt is in the centre to show what he thinks. 😄

[@edgarjacksby1402]

That dog is probably smarter then every person in that video. They could not look more like a dudebro incel.

[@Daniel145D]

I will say James Mangold has a stellar repertoire. Walk the line, 3:10 to Yuma, Logan, Ford V Ferrari.. I have hope it’ll at least be competently made, regardless of the agendas

[@RM_VFX]

My wife actually wants to go see this as our first post-covid film, because "it's Indiana Jones!" and I keep telling her "no, it's not."

[@Jabber-ig3iw]

Post covid? Jeez did you sleep in?

[@RM_VFX]

@@Jabber-ig3iw We just haven't gone to a theater at all in 3 years, not much reason to anyway.

[@AMARTmtz]

@@RM_VFX go see the new John wick asap

[@Eternaldarkness3166]

It's just some guy doing a bad cosplay 😂

[@VespoLiveGaming]

Can't wait for the sequel- Indiana Jones and the search for the Irish Spring.

[@phonepunk7888]

He is older than Joe Biden. Would anyone go to watch an action movie starring Joe Biden?

[@archstanton9073]

@@phonepunk7888 If it features him falling down or up stairs for 90 minutes, I'm there in the theater on release day.

[@deadartist8827]

Indian Jones and the quest for the remote

[@PeakDennisReynolds]

Indiana Jones and the Dial Of A Dementia Diagnosis. Harrison Ford is a bellend for doing a 300 million action film at 80 years of age I don't care how many people think he's a legend.

[@kingofthegrill]

Remember that era where Disney made like, Little Mermaid 2 and Lion King 1 1/2? Remember how parents pretty much ignored these movies and just kept showing their kids the classics while ignoring the cash-in junk of the same franchise? That's gonna be this era. Everyone will remember this time as the era of beloved movies getting garbage sequels 20 years later.

[@hv3115]

Yeah, i remember those awful straight-to-video sequels to Disney's animated classics like Aladdin, Beauty and the Beast and The Lion King. Disney nearly tarnished their legacy with that awful decision but then they came to their senses and put a stop in it. In this case, it isnt that simple. They refuse to accept that most people don't want anti-male, fem inist, SJW crap in their movies. Despite fan backlash and ample evidence of "Go woke, go broke," The Message is too important and MUST be forced down our throats.. whether we like it or not.

[@Crunch630]

Lion King 1 and a half was great though... It was animated and authentic. Fun to relive events from the first movie in a different perspective.

[@DepravedCoTApologist]

​@Crunch630 That movie will forever be goated for the ending with the silhouettes of all the different Disney characters showing up to watch the movie, and the payoff of Pumba's crowds joke

[@Crunch630]

@@DepravedCoTApologist oh Yeah! Thank you for reminding me about that. That was fun.

[@stev3548]

hey 1-1/2 was good, i'll die on that hill.

[@Leppymusic]

It took me a while to realize why critical doggo was so quiet and why he doesn't have his own channel (yet). 🤦🏻‍♂️

[@underthepale]

11:15 There's a nice cross section of why *I love Little Platoon.* Glad to know the insight and dry wit can be summoned on command.

[@MGP2210]

13:41 John Rhys-Davies' character, Sallah, was deceased at the time of the previous movie. What is he doing here?

[@Cptkl]

You're thinking of his dad and Marcus Brody, Sallah was never mentioned to have passed away

[@MGP2210]

​@@Cptkl Ah okay. Just watched a clip to see what I misremembered. Thought Indy said, "Dad and Sallah." 👍👍

[@Cptkl]

@@MGP2210 yeah I figured that was the mixup, definitely an easy mistake to make especially after 15 years since the last one lol

[@richardspanner5923]

_"Indiana Jones and the frame of Dr Zimmer.."_ _Perhaps the reason why Indy says 'God-daughter' is so that the bartender is left in no doubt whatsoever that he just has very poor luck when it comes to extended family members, rather than him having excruciatingly poor taste in women._

[@alanmitchell1132]

Indiana Jones and the hip replacement of destiny.

[@alphamike87]

Dial of Destiny has an Egg Timer of Dinner feeling lol

[@nhmooytis7058]

😂

[@amcconnell6730]

2:35 "Why would you say that to a bartender..." Well, if I were 80, and a regular, and buying a drink for a 30-something - I'd say that to avoid the "sad old man hitting on someone" vibe.

[@mightybluespider]

😂"sad"

[@TapCat]

But if you were a regular, you probably wouldn't call him "bartender" because you'd know his name.

[@scottclark3139]

I remember watching Raiders as an 8 year old thinking, what this story is missing is an image of Indy asleep in front of the tellie.

[@RBKeown]

Remember at the end of Last Crusade when Indy rode off into the sunset? I liked that. That was a great ending to a great series.

[@fredo1070]

Old Indiana Jones in the 1960s will meet a CGI James Bond and say 'dad!'

[@pattycakesinc]

Indy 5 is gonna make Crystal Skull look like Raiders of the Lost Ark

[@flamesintheattic]

I like the meme that Short Round should have taken the reigns as the next Indy type character. Would have been awesome!

[@Zebiekistis]

Hell, I'd watch Indiana Jones in his 30s whipping hippies for an hour, bring it on!

[@kaczan3]

Drinking gabe for Indy 5: Whenever the goddaughter says anything, you say "Shut up, Meg" and take a shot.

[@diemes5463]

That's not a game, that's suicide

[@Nobleheart111]

Equally valid option upon experiencing this movie…

[@edgarjacksby1402]

the world could use less incels... drink up

[@garym6315]

They didn't even need to waste that amount on the budget. All you need is Harrison, a desert and a good story. Usual Lucasfilm mismanagement where they don't know what they're doing at the outset so have to throw huge amounts of money at it for reshoots and alterations.

[@Arthur_King_of_the_Britons]

Harrison Ford is a legend who made a great series of films, female cultural vandals get their feet under the table and have nothing to contribute but to steal his legacy and tear chunks off him for being an 'old white man'

[@HumbleGarfield]

jesse what the fuck are you talking about

[@ouchiegiverjr]

Honestly the 4th had a cool message of how knowledge was the true treasure

[@powwowken2760]

It's legitimately incredible how much is wrong with just that one 'god-daughter' line. - Number one, no human being would ever say that in the first place. - Second, the fact that he does say it is incredibly insulting to both characters since if he actually considered her his god-daughter then he'd just call her his daughter, which would also give the director a chance to have the girl correct him in a way that gives some insight into their relationship while adding exposition naturally. - Third, they put it in the TRAILER! They're so nervous about this new female character that they need to shove her relationship to Indy down your throat before you even go to the movie. Typical modern writing where a female character couldn't possibly be allowed to stand on her own merits and needs to be forcefully tied to an existing character that they can use as a stepping stone.

[@Donnerbalken28]

It's honestly a bit sad how insecure these writers seem to feel about themselves, to think that they absolutely need to be related to some big guy to have success.

[@brundelfly1]

"Same for the character exposition..." Embarrassing that this level of scripting is now just accepted.

[@snakedogman]

10:55 oh absolutely. "It belongs in a museum" would be an absolutely impossible line to put in the movie now. Museums are places celebrating imperialism and colonialism and the artifacts need to be returned to whichever place they came from (even if the country currently occupying that space didn't even exist then). The whole idea of Indiana Jones as a "treasure hunter", even if it's to uncover artifacts to put in museums, is completely against everything current year. Really the new Indiana Jones (f) should be a burglar, breaking into museums to take out the artifacts and return them. It would really be more of a heist movie.

[@hope-cat4894]

Yep, take them back to countries that have political instability and will probably be destroyed by militias, bombs, or raiders who will steal it and sell it on the black market where no will be allowed to see it ever again. 🙄

[@RetroRespawn]

Madds Mikkelsen as the villain. How original.

[@didinx8417]

I know, its because he is now generic Western European actor for hire for all your bad guy needs. He is so much better than that.

[@williet.3058]

Still gonna watch the movie for him alone

[@dcmastermindfirst9418]

Americans just love making foreigners the bad buy. Usually it's Germans but Madds is close enough.

[@james5995]

@@didinx8417 True, watch Another Round, Madds' dancing is something to behold.

[@lesigh1749]

@@didinx8417 He really is lowering himself lately. From Grindelwald stand in to whatever the hell this is, he can do much better.

[@gozorak]

"Fortunate Son" is the most overused popular song in all of media for anything vietnam war era related

[@benjaminperez7328]

Buffalo Springfield’s “For what it’s worth.”

[@derek96720]

Jimi Hendrix "All Along The Watchtowers"

[@Zebiekistis]

Harrison Ford once said in an interview that he does not want Indiana Jones to be recast. Once he (Ford) dies, the character dies with him. So much for that....

[@warren286]

The best use of Sympathy for the Devil I know of was at the end of Interview with the Vampire.

[@rado3880]

Facts

[@namelesswon]

So overly used

[@garym6315]

This whole time I was pissed off at the idea of her being the daughter of Marcus Brody, but I am happy that she is the daughter of Toby Jones, who is a new character. At least they're not messing with Marcus's legacy.

[@b.chaline4394]

Brace yourself though, I wouldn’t be surprised if there was a line in there implying that Marcus was gay, since Denholm Elliott was bisexual in real life (and died of AIDS).

[@dashx1103]

I wanted her to be the daughter of Martin Brody, .. and I wanted the son of Jaws to swallow her whole.

[@fredo1070]

Indiana Jones the Godfather Part IV has all the excitement of Terminator Dark Fate.

[@blueskies5588]

Bait and switch is the only thing KK has in her quiver of sorrow

[@davebaconusa1062]

"You belong in a museum," is inevitable-- kudos.

[@strahinjagov]

Critical Doggo continues to provide the best takes. 🐶

[@6581punk]

You just know the trailers are very selectively edited to make it look like a normal Indiana Jones film. But watch it and there will lots of messaging.

[@phonepunk7888]

The trailer is mostly a rich British woman scolding Indy. If this was selectively edited then she must spend 100% the runtime belittling him.

[@paulconway384]

@@phonepunk7888 Didn't she woke Bond as well? 😂

[@flexaspriklepem1689]

Can´t we get like an Indiana Jones and Marvels crossover? With a bit of Ezra Miller and Amber Turd?

[@kaczan3]

Insuring beds costs too much.

[@arktv213]

The dream team of Hollywood's worst.

[@beauwalker9820]

Miller might body slam Amber though... Actually, then again people would pay to see that.

[@flexaspriklepem1689]

@@beauwalker9820 Imagine the court battle of AH vs EM

[@Vilfy]

@beauwalker9820 actually that would be the best thing in that entire movie.

[@theharshtruth8563]

This should be called Indiana Jones & the Prolapsed Anus Walls of Recycling Deja Vu Movie Plots with a Hemorrhoid Mary-Sue hero lead character.

[@Werewolf.with.Internet.Access]

“Indiana Jane and The Femple of Womb” It’s illegal to make me laugh that hard, sir, I’ll see you in court

[@Bubbleskittymaster]

i swear film makers just have a list of songs to put in movies and nothing else,