How To Stop Chasing A Guy And Why Guys Stop Chasing (VERY IMPORTANT IN DEPTH)

[@jessiewilson4993]

If he's not chasing just let him go

[@teanna4569]

I dont want a man chasing me, he should be showing interest in me, there a difference, everything is not black and white and every man treats every woman differently and will date her differently, you can't go by every single thing these dating coaches say, you should only use some of this stuff to your advantage, the rest depends on that individual and experience..I hear alot in these videos and comments a man should be calling all you all the time everyday all day, thats negative you gotta give a man enough time to miss you, otherwise your gonna burn out especially after the honeymoon stage when things change..if a guy goes from 0- 100 and stay at 100 he gonna drive you nuts, the average person will come back down to 60-70 just to keep their sanity, but a women would think he is not interested, ppl do have lives, and I've been involved with bug- a - boo men its annoying asf, nothing worse than a 5 stage clinger, I just want you to show interest, and let's see how long you stick around...that doesn't mean blow my phone up, cause then iam block yo ass...

[@michelleperez4274]

Dating other people is the way to stop chasing, in my opinion.

[@legdaytacos62]

Michelle Perez yes ! Plural dating is the secret

[@lisah8438]

How the hell are you going to date other people if you can't ask a guy out. That is a contradictory statement.

[@mademoiselleannarose9623]

You would date other people until he proposes to you or until marriage?

[@ArtsyMegz_On_Etsy]

I was thinkin' about it, lol! Even if I chatted online with another guy for a while, just to think about someone else. But if I end up liking the guy, and then the other guy I like asks me out, I don't know if I could choose between them. And I don't want to go through the pain and guilt of ditching a guy after leading them on for weeks or months on end. BUT, if I come to find that thos fella is just wanting to play me, and ditches and picks me up whenever he pleases,vi will make a promise to everyone here that I will start talking to other guys and keep and open mind about dating someone 😉.

[@MissSarahGM]

Ladies, it is all true, we need to stop entertaining them when they don't meet our needs for safety and commitment. After the "free access period" to us, when we show them what we have to bring to a relationship, be it 6/8 weeks or more, do not give them free access to your feminine energy without them giving you what you need. The dating scene nowadays makes it too easy for men to have their cake and eat it too. While we experience the anxiety and heartbreak. Let us collectively pull back and punish their inconsistency and uncertainty with our unavailability.

[@mujerbella66]

EXACTLY !!!

[@ak-47intelligence75]

Agree

[@mustbeMajour]

Amen! I think all heterosexual women need to be on a strike and or just what you said punish for the inconsistency. The dating world is so crazy these days with all the options on social media etc

[@MissSarahGM]

The dating scene is creating new connection patterns and women are the big losers. It takes a few dating experiences to realize that we don't get what we were looking for (connection, love, commitment), while they try us for a while by misleading us, they get the validation and sex. Then they start to express doubts, backpedal, and most women are too weak to walk away at this point. When we have poor boundaries and low standards, craving for love, we enable those boys not to grow and keep using us. If we all came to this realization, and stop entertaining the flaky, confused men that have nothing to offer to us, then they will have to look inside and start to grow and become real men.

[@MissSarahGM]

@Cindy Lou Yep! And also setting boundaries and standards as soon as something bothers you. Many guys will then pull away but the ones who will stay are the rare ones who value you.

[@solidcatink]

because we woman fall in love. we love him and only him. that's how we roll.

[@nofybn7794]

YES, IT IS A MISTAKE.

[@macngeez3786]

false. usually you woman fall in love with multiple guys at once and just leave us all crushed.

[@faith_9677]

It's giving the goodies away that is the mistake because thats power.

[@Texaslady199]

That's exactly how I roll.

[@jamiereneemilligan]

Mac N' Geez not true at all. We fall hard for one guy and he wants many women.

[@joannam2472]

I gave my ultimatum he thought I was bluffing and ignored me. A week later he was calling, still doesn’t want to commit but wants to see me. Told him I made myself really clear and he told me to block him instead 🤣

[@Poison_Ivy22]

Been in a relationship for nearly 6 years now and I feel so bad for both men and women in our generation today bc dating has turned into a joke 😞.. dating went from finding your soulmate to just hooking up and keeping your options open now. I don’t miss the single life.

[@michelles7060]

I appreciate your sympathy. It’s miserable out here. Men have unlimited options. I consider myself lucky to have options, but they are not bf material.

[@user-oi1mb5sq1r]

Who wants a boyfriend? A boyfriend is NOT A HUSBAND. Women need husbands.

[@shutit4024]

Amira Nasir yeah but still

[@valerieb8814]

Michelle ugh 6 years in a relationship ?..tbh even in a relationship it seems all like a game no matter what. like they can be into u but not be in love with u to where they see a future with u but they stay with u anyway and it’s just all a waste of time like why r u even with me that long if we aren’t planning kids together or buying a house together..been there done that

[@Poison_Ivy22]

Valerie B it obviously depends on the relationship bc every relationship is different but relationship is simply about 2 people wanting to be together, it doesn’t last only if one of them or both parties agreed to end it. People forget now that relationships are not always going to be sunshine and rainbows and that there will be problems along the way. You have to be patient and understanding. People walk out too easily now once it stops being convenient for them. That’s why a lot of relationships fail so easily now for people. Now if the relationship is abusive and toxic and cheating then yes it’s best to walk away if there is no hope.

[@IAmAwesomeSoAreYou]

Men are just puppies. They should be the ones chasing. If you’re the one chasing that puppy, it’s a bad puppy. Get a new one 😂. Also, ladies, learn to have options and backups. Not that it’s a problem for us. It’s a lot easier for us than men actually.

[@patriciaearley4177]

Yes I agree! Most men have some kind of list of women they can contact if one falls through. Women should have that same mindset keep options open until it's a mutual thing🙏👌✌🍀

[@patriciaearley4177]

@Chuck oh ok,well a lot of women most likely believe that about men, that they're playing the field if he's a popular/ attractive/ smooth talker on top of it,it's automatically assumed in that case.I believe honesty is needed from both otherwise I don't see the point quite frankly.I personally don't play these dumb games and if I see that from a guy I'm out plain and simple 👋✌

[@patriciaearley4177]

@Chuck LOL

[@nofybn7794]

@Chuck You still haven't listened to me, RESPECT WOMEN!!

[@nofybn7794]

@@patriciaearley4177 PREACH!

[@hazielcarrasco264]

Yes we do give in, but once we’re done we are DONE we don’t look back!!

[@Nina-jc3be]

I never look back and I cut them off pretty early on, like 3 weeks or 2 weeks. Hopefully I am doing the right thing.

[@karenphelan6107]

I think the problem happens when he 'hooks' you in. Then as a woman you like him. Then he pulls back and plays cool. And a woman then starts to wonder was it all BS and doubt herself. So what just be cool and pretend him being cool doesn't bother you? Start dating other guys? Even though you like the one that's 'hooked' you in.

[@sansadrake4133]

Yeh start dating others

[@FM-zg5hz]

Yes. If he’s not investing time, money, effort into you, then it’s time to move on and start dating other guys.

[@nikstar1313]

Yeah!

[@reikoortega6278]

I listened to your advice on building attraction in the early stages of dating and not worrying about the outcome or having the "what are we" talk with my guy. The other day he casually called me his girlfriend :)

[@ElliotScottDating]

boom!!!

[@reikoortega6278]

Elliot Scott “If you don’t reveal your cards he’s gonna have to” ♥

[@nicoletteobrien3574]

How did you build attraction?

[@rachelshank6307]

@@nicoletteobrien3574 right 😂

[@diouranke]

The chasing part is often chasing sex honestly , if he isn't showing interest or putting in effort at all that's a whole other issue.

[@nini-oi7mk]

I feel like having all this at the back of your mind all the time when you are into somebody is just like playing games but then the video is a reality too ...it's exhausting and sad tbh😔

[@laleezy77]

Exactly..cut em off! A guy will cut us off if a woman isn't what they want in a heartbeat!

[@susanbates9649]

Not texting this guy until he text me if he doesn't then I have my answer

[@cozettem8226]

That's because we get emotionally involved which makes it impossible not to go crazy when they pull away and withdraw the attention and affection we are used to. It's very hard to cut a man off when a guy I'm this actually attracted to and gives me the feels only comes around once every 20 years. And when he's shown up as everything I've ever wanted of course it's hard to let go. And so we keep hoping he will eventually fall in love and stop chasing others and will only want me. If there were more options of attractive men with great personalities then it's easy to get rid of a guy that wont treat me the way I want.

[@obstantiadiscindo]

Cozette M Amen, sister. I know exactly what you mean. So frustrating that we can't just turn the feelings off for him, and turn them on to a guy that's good for us!

[@dannettekaiser2951]

Back in the dating game after many years and all this advice is gold. Even at 50+ they still behave this way. Trying to learn what I can. Thanks for keeping it real .

[@jesssims975]

Hey I just wanted to say thank you Something finally clicked, I've had a fwb for almost 6 months and I talk to other guys, to me he was the main priority. Anyway I feel like I always go out of my way for him even though I've got guys asking to be the rebound or them actually knowing im going to see my #1 and still asking to hang out hours before When he texted last night where am I and I was so quick to give my reply I realized I was too hook on a guy that didn't want to change his lifestyle to include me in it and I should move on before I really get hurt.

[@ak-47intelligence75]

You lose power because you gave up the PP too easy. Thats how you get emotion, that's how you give in to his advances, that's when you start seeking validation. Women dont just " simply give in ". Lust is very hard to break. They give in because the shame of sleeping with him is eating at them. So now, they just GOTTA have him. Keep your power. Close your legs. Harness your super power. Also, you cannot be elusive and mysterious if you've slept with him. Theres nothing to chase anymore.

[@Poison_Ivy22]

I like this! 😊

[@Mamamia90210]

So true! Everything changed for me when we slept together. I felt like I was constantly trying to prove my worth after that. And that I was good enough. I felt soo insecure

[@Tluv_1955]

PREACH 💯💯💯

[@enarcmcfly]

Yeah. That sounds like gaslighting. Not my fault men hold no objective value for women in general outside of getting the poosay. I don't want that guy anyways. I'm not here to raise little boys. Why do men get to fuck when they want to and we have to deny ourselves. Rather be single than deal with that cultural madness.

[@luckybeauty2193]

so what about when you sleep with him lol play it cool and he keeps chasing and then withdraws because you are not allowing yourself to be hooked and he clearly is used to girls chasing him and you refuse to.

[@sourgummiez]

I love your theory because I’ve felt this way about so many guys and had such a hard time telling them because I’d talk way too much instead of simply telling them just because I like you, doesn’t mean I want a RELATIONSHIP with you. Two totally different things!! I can also really respect guys I connect with in a different way now as well due to you giving this clarity. I can respect when I’m not their ideal match for a long term mate, when I was younger I didn’t see the bigger picture like that and I’d take it personally. Thanks Elliot ❤️

[@23sinnocent]

Here's my question: I am a strong, free~spirited, independent, kick assholes to the curb, creative feminist ...why does it feel like no one is looking for me? In 25 years of dating experience, no one is trying to "court" me ...even on dating apps no one is trying to reach out. What is up with that? Immature guys? Are 90% ~ 95% not ready/too immature?

[@hollyj2925]

This is great information. I agree with everything you said. I'm 53 and thinking of dating again soon. I have no problem walking away. I know my worth. 🥰🥰🥰

[@hollyj2925]

@Chuck thanks for letting me know.

[@Blurbbox]

@@hollyj2925 HAHAHAHA!!! Chuck is worth every penny we pay him. Keep slaying, Queen !!!

[@hollyj2925]

@@Blurbbox LoL I know right!

[@FM-zg5hz]

Chuck Why are you even in the comments of these videos? If the videos don’t interest you, why are you here? Find something better to do with your time lol. Weirdo.

[@hollyj2925]

@@FM-zg5hz I agree exactly!

[@katherinehendrix5325]

Ty, it's Wednesday and I haven't heard from my bf since the weekend when I was at his house. I used your tactic of ignoring him. He literally just texted me. Also going to wait to text him back. Ha ha!!!!

[@Dabupa1185]

You are just so helpful, Elliot. I know you aren't excusing men, you're just giving us the real. You've helped me so much in my dating life. THANK U

[@gzta5355]

After I experienced heartbreak I trained myself the art of manipulation. Unfortunately dating is a game you lose or win. Men play games what women don't realize is that women hold more power. Observe his body language, find his weakness and as we all know men value their egos. Think logically not with your emotions, men are logical. I know it's easier said than done train yourself read books, watch videos and I'm telling you from experience you will have men chasing you

[@beac8238]

What books do you recommend?

[@21972012145525]

I love the addition of the slides! Thank you Elliot!

[@Yumyumhoneybun]

Me too

[@purple_panda4551]

You know, I feel like I’ve slowly but surely have implemented the tips you’re giving on my own, but watching this I believe will hell me more. So thanks

[@BA-hb9hh]

HIGHLY RECOMMEND THIS VIDEO

[@claudiaclaudia8599]

I love this slide style of teaching ,thank you for your help and hard work🙏❤️

[@ges3061]

Damn it I messed up Elliot been talking to this guy for about a month now. We slept together and now I caught feelings.

[@natashamnisi9074]

Same boat

[@yf8350]

Lmao we’re all in that boat

[@terukiato]

I really like the format of the video with bullets to explain what you're saying. I watched several of your videos, and since you tend to sometimes begin a sentence and then stop to begin another one, since English isn't my primary language, I tend to space out and loose the string of conversation (video). It wouldn't be bad to see your face while you make a point you could show as a PPoint, I even think that mixing up both styles would be beneficial for your channel. My opinion ;) Keep up the good work!

[@catherineadams5051]

Nothing but real truth here.

[@elizabethseiden1867]

Honestly, men date and hook up with as many women they possibly can without getting attached. It’s a game changer for women to be emotionally detached while dating multiple men without sex, just maybe a light kiss.😻🍿🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥

[@acostew5287]

I think a good way to say it is, giving ladies the tools to use best appropriate for their situation.

[@acostew5287]

Thanks Elliott! I was married 10 yrs and before that was 5 yrs. Marriage was a very hard, manipulative marriage. Im 36 yrs old and after 15 yrs of commitment and more therapy hours/$$ than I care to know or total. Im back in the game. Learning and doing things very differently. Your insight has been priceless. Love ya' and cant Thank you enough. Your a solid and sound voice of clarity when things get confusing. Learning how to walk and knowing my value is what you have done for me. Thank you.

[@elizabethseiden1867]

Players are tools with a mindset that he can get a woman hooked without investing.

[@bglorified4069]

dopest one yet!!!!

[@soniagil7453]

I swear you’re the best coach ever !!!!🙌🏼❤️

[@mujerbella66]

I don't know I did the opposite of outcome dependent and I'm still single.

[@francisrivas9497]

Maybe they just weren't for you and that's okay. At least now you dont have to waste your time

[@mujerbella66]

@@francisrivas9497 dam skippy

[@savvydavvy3463]

Alot of men feel threatened by non-outcome dependent women.

[@sevivel4888]

Thank you very much! I found everything you said very useful! Can you give me clarity about what kind of ultimatum you mentioned about? Best wishes :)

[@jenniferheath5398]

😂🤣his goofy ass....I love it. Keep being as real as you are always love.

[@connienamutebi9451]

thank you soooo muuchhh Elliot for these awesome videos...they always come at the right time

[@nadiaoloui3909]

I love your face and your content. Congrats on being a great youtuber!

[@melissakeplerlvsmrt]

This is your best video yet!!

[@astraeaelune6668]

What about when you get the commitment, but then he suddenly pulls away saying he's "not ready for a relationship?" Met someone else or commitment phobe?

[@ElliotScottDating]

prob commitment problem.

[@MissSarahGM]

@@ElliotScottDating Do you think the commitment idea and exclusivity talk should come from the man?

[@ElliotScottDating]

@@MissSarahGM it should but it wont

[@MissSarahGM]

@@ElliotScottDating So how should we play it in order to be sure he wants it?

[@IAMTangiere]

Sarah M He’s already told you and showed you that he doesn’t want it. It’s best to accept his word for it and move on.

[@tonyasmith8502]

I love this video, love your videos!!! I will be listening again 😚😁

[@chilloften]

I love that slide, screenshoted that, as I'm always tricked. You are great help to me Elliot, and FUN and handsome gentleman. 🌹🔥

[@mollykam8294]

I am still watching this video…I love what you taught…I did follow all you said … heheheheheh~~

[@allanawright206]

Loved this one... I loved how you broke the understanding of it all down 💖👌👌👌🙏 thankyou xx

[@elizamonique9196]

Your videos are so sobering! Thank you

[@geigernelly17]

Thank U, very focused, helpful and precise video 💙🙏🏻☺️

[@AudreyLuerding]

So true! Thx for the video❤️

[@fellymae2864]

I love the brutal honestly man, really appreciate that 🙏🏻

[@rameeztyson]

Thankkkkkk youuu and love you .superb video.

[@flu943]

This is almost perfect! Explains the whole process perfectly. Good job!

[@tulinbeyduz920]

I slept with my friend of ten years . .. fell for him . Now he’s gone all quiet . I even wished him a happy birthday and he didn’t even reply .. :(...... what did I do ? He was coming onto me it wasn’t just me .. now I wish we just kept our friendship . :(...

[@jaykaykissesfalife]

Gosh this is so true. Why are we like this ?

[@lilethm.alvarez7330]

Right on time 👌🏼

[@maia594]

GOLDEN INFORMATION!

[@lilethm.alvarez7330]

Guess who has notifications turned on

[@gorgeouslymade1754]

Spot on! Thank you!

[@terrymoore2]

This’s soooooo true , thanks 😊

[@mollykam8294]

Wonderful advices

[@isabellairaca1669]

Great video, thanks!!

[@entitled7665]

I been watching shit loads of videos to empower myself~~~I must be a pro at this ish,,,🧐I no longer tolerate foolishness 🥴from any man!

[@TeshaWheel]

Thank you for your work in this video! Any chance you'll be adding this to your course library?

[@ElliotScottDating]

I can add a more in-depth version of it if you like

[@TeshaWheel]

@@ElliotScottDating Oooo Even better! Look forward to that! This will be a great compliment to the modules you have in the library, and great to have easy reference! Have really loved and enjoyed your unique and unorthodox perspectives on male behavior and insights in your course. Really valuable! Going to listen to the moules often as the material is difficult to digest, being completely different from what culture has taught us, its so counterintuitive, and new social norms with male behavior also at play. Thanks for being willing to shed new light, helps to understand fundamentals of male behavior and get to understanding the root of it. Would be helpful if we could get a detailed section on strategies in weeding out those problem guys right out of the gate and shifting to identifying quality in the "investigative" stage" whilst trying to be fun and not make 'mistakes'...so much pressure... How to not spook the cat on the hot tin roof while finding out his deal... its hard for women to do this work and have to wait 6 or more weeks, almost like feeling around in the dark, only to find out they were wasting time and got lost in someone not worth it. Thanks again!

[@chucalissa9231]

This video has open !! My EYES."" Dang --- 👀🙆

[@Valentinovixen]

No expectations !!!

[@emilymann4056]

Eliott i stopped chasing guy when he lost interest. And now he has interest and chasing me because he most lily noticed i stopped chasing FIRST is this how it works?

[@leeannajohnson1008]

Emily Mann yes

[@Libra8410]

I love Elliott's ramblings lol

[@Yumyumhoneybun]

Me too

[@whiteliner2253]

Hey Elliot! My dude I’m first 👍🏽

[@Yumyumhoneybun]

I needed this!

[@aliciaa5723]

Hi Elliot! Aren't there any men who look for a more serious/mature kind of woman who is more consistent and strong-willed? I feel that when I'm playful and funny on dates, but elusive and flaky in texts (because I find texting super boring), men distrust me, and they would rather be with someone who gives them more stability and consistency.

[@terrischofield4671]

Great analogy.

[@laurenrichards212]

I love this amazing video

[@AngieParfaite]

Love you Elliot Scott my favourite dating coach 😘 🔔 ✔️ now ❤️ me 4️⃣ ever! 😘

[@creatureofstyle]

I'm outcome dependent and if a guy shows me I'm not going to get that outcome from him then I leave and find a guy who will give me that outcome 🤷‍♀️

[@sunflowerslily]

I love this !! 😁😁😁

[@elameenabey3795]

Peace. Elliot you speak the truth...

[@Kryestoral]

Thanks for this.

[@realgoddess92]

Hello, Can you speak about this same subject but in terms of long distance relationships?

[@daniellekenyon4045]

Elliot, as an intelligent older woman, what you discuss makes a lot of sense. As a woman when it comes to men I believe there are too many in the world to put up, chase, beg for. If they don't want to be with me then leave...However losing my husband, my love, and being older I'm enjoying time with someone who is comfortable an do we have great sex. But I put up with shit, ghosting and waiting for sex...is it cause I'm of my age?

[@mrsmabrya]

Love your vids & sense of humor--common sense given where needed. Thanks Elliott

[@Aja.S]

man ! only truthful I love you too

[@taylortiffany81]

Thank you! I needed this ❤️

[@daphnen5296]

Great 👍

[@tulinbeyduz920]

What happens if you wish a guy happy birthday, she hope he as a great day .. ect 🎂 and it’s been 2 days and no reply ..

[@Hellowhatup98]

dude u r amazing

[@beatrizfonseca6059]

In my case he never chased hard but he is consistant. So I'm very confused. I asked him and he said he wants a relashionship.

[@brownsugarglamour]

“Just watching my video” 😭😂😂💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀

[@elizabethseiden1867]

I made a mistake by catching feelings for a guy. I blocked him on Tinder.

[@sunnyg.6606]

Does anyone know if the “stop chasing” can be implemented at 4 months of dating? Or is it too late??

[@Mamamia90210]

Claudia S. G. You can always turn it around at any point

[@musicalacting]

pretty good video

[@allisona9490]

How do you phrase this ultimatum?

[@SaltationIgnite]

What kind of ultimatum after 6 dates?

[@rachelrussell3141]

8:26 The thing is if it’s a guy who not ready to be lock down this would happened.. so ladies make sure and let the guy know this is what I am looking for and observe and make your decision.. the thing is we always wait and leave what we want to them and allow games to begin and be hurt by the out come because we didn’t stand up for ourselves and call him out on shyt!! Period. We have to stop make guys a study… let them make study videos about US!!

[@jenmeyers2539]

What do I do if I got a little text crazy and now the guy is hesitant to hook up ? How can I show him I won’t be a headache

[@Nina-jc3be]

So, am I getting this right - if we behave like they do, this will make them want us more and give us more value?

[@lorettawilson9160]

EXACTLY ELLIOT HAVE THAT YOU DONT GIVE A DAM ATTITUDE.

[@christinaclaydon4822]

I love you, you are just awesome

[@gracelepri-valitutti2633]

What if you work for him? He knows l like him but he told me he doesn't want a relationship with me. But he is very attracted to me. How can l walk away because l work for him. I did give him a choice, l really don't know what to do.

[@susanbates9649]

Overtexting is chasing and bombarding. I've done it and he knows I get that way but one day it wasn't ok.. last Wednesday he was like stop please and when I said ya I bombed you and at work all I got was a thumbs ups, we've been dating over a year.. now hes silent, ?? Now what