How to get people to say YES!

Learn the simple, secret word that makes people say yes to you more often! Find out the best ways to make polite requests of bosses, co-workers, friends, family, or strangers. First, we will look at the 3 levels of requests and what they are based on. Then you will practice how to adjust your language to different situations, problems, and people. This lesson will help you achieve more success in business and life!
Test your understanding with the quiz: www.engvid.com/how-to-get-peop...
TRANSCRIPT
Hi. I'm Rebecca from engVid, and this special lesson will help you get people to do things for you. How? In two different ways. By teaching you the language that you need to make requests, and the psychology that you need to make request, because the language will show you how to make a polite request, and the psychology will teach you how to make an effective request. In fact, if you keep listening, in the middle of this lesson, I'm going to share with you some research that was done by psychologists that show you one secret word, one keyword and technique that will help people to say "yes" to you when you ask for something. Okay? So keep watching and listening.
Now, when we start to talk about the language, you should know that there are three factors that determine what language we use to make a polite request. The first one is: What is the relationship of the person that you're asking? Okay? Is it a family member, is it a colleague, or is it a stranger? Okay? Because obviously, we speak differently to these different people. Right? Okay. Next: What is the difficulty-okay?-of the request? Are you asking for a lot of the person's time, or effort, or money, or something else? How hard is it for that person to do that for you? And third: What is the size of the request? Is it a small request, is it a kind of medium-sized request, or is it a huge request, are you asking a lot of that person? Why is this important? Because the size of the request will determine also the language that we use, and that's what we're going to look at next.
Okay, so let's start with a small request. "Can I go now?" Medium request: "Do you think I could leave now?" Big request: "I was wondering if it would be possible for me to leave early?" So, what were some of the characteristics of these three different kind of requests? Okay? The small one was a little bit more direct, informal, and short. The medium request was more polite, formal, and the standard size of a question. And the bigger request was very polite, very formal, and also very long. So what that means is that when you want to ask something more serious, you need to say more words, you need to make it longer. Okay? And I'll show you some of the expressions that you use in order to do that.
Let's take another example. Small request: "Got $5?" Medium request: "Could you please lend me $25?" Big request: "I hope you don't mind my asking, but could I please borrow $250?" Okay? So we went from 5 to 25 to 250; it became a little more serious. And because it was more serious, here, the sentence, the question was much longer. What kind of expressions did we use? "I was wondering if it would be possible", "I hope you don't mind my asking, but". You see how we have so many words before we actually get to the main part? But here, we have very few words before we get to the main part. Right? Because it's more informal, and this is more formal, and this is somewhere in between, so we had just a few extra words: "Do you think I could", "Could you please". Right? So these are the key phrases which you will find in the research, I'll tell you later where you can download this resource which has these expressions.
But now I'm going to tell you what I told you I was going to tell you, which is: What is that key that the psychologists found through their research that will help you to be more successful when you make a request? Well, it was this: When you ask somebody for something, if you tell them why, if you give them the reason or if you use the word "because" to give them the reason, it will help you to get a more positive reply. So, let's try that now and see how you feel when I ask you these questions, this time using a... Either the word "because", or giving you a reason. Okay?
"Can I go now? Because I have to pick up my kids." Okay? So it's a little bit different when I tell you that I need to go because I have to pick up my kids. Right? So that reason that I gave you might help you... Help you to decide that: Yes, it's okay for me to go. Okay? "Got $5? Because I need to buy lunch." Okay? All right.

[@delphineyara7259]

Thank you so much for this helpful lesson.❤

[@adrianillox1]

Thanks again!! You're the best!!

[@r9o2b0e2r1t7o]

Such a helpful lesson Rebecca, thank you so much! :))

[@marcogonzales4575]

Thanks to the videos I have to learn much better

[@msh4166]

Thank You So Much

[@ghitalah3218]

Thank you so much

[@mohaali8686]

Thank you very much teacher .

[@luoyong498]

thanks you teacher ！

[@berihuokbayokbay1879]

Thanks moer just what needed excellent videos thanks rebecca

[@disnakumudini3190]

thank you.

[@larijaskuskovnika3277]

Thank you

[@khadidjahassi1481]

thank u very much ^^

[@diegonayalazo]

Thanks

[@eugeniehiggins4323]

That helped me very much I spent ageesss looking for a video

[@benalexender3046]

peace and love from Egypt

[@kamleshsainiindia]

I liked this video very much.

[@syarfinsaragih9482]

Sure Done

[@saqibhussain6879]

Excellent

[@jnamri7545]

Thanks :]

[@richardbaron1626]

Im sorprise are you doing really good Job. I'm think I'm learning thanks for your help...

[@user-zw1kh1di9h]

Thanks, it's a cool lesson!

[@maricute5448]

I'm pleased with your lesson & thank you.

[@ronenr1405]

My very beloved video EVER

[@engvidRebecca]

Thank you so much, Ronen! So glad you found the lesson helpful.

[@catmuffin4953]

Thanks, I would really love a kitten, and my mum says she'll think about it!

[@renegarcia6566]

Just what I needed, excellent videos thanks Rebecca

[@yousufali7315]

Thank you very much🌹

[@jeffersonhenrique1643]

Greetings from brazil!

[@mtrghiu44]

Dont do it! Violence is spreading and getting worse and worse everyday.

[@eddiegumisad2776]

Cool

[@rupeshluhar9529]

Thanks Rebecca for uploading these awesome videos, you are not even earning from these videos, as we can't see any advertisement before the video starts. Thanks again.

[@pedrofigueiredo1077]

Thanks a lot, Rebecca! This lesson is wonderful. (Azores Islands, 14Jan2023);

[@iron8162]

Powder that makes you say "Yes"

[@grmartinez7]

Thanks a lot Rebeca. I enjoy your classes.

[@carlosdellepiagge]

Thank you very much. Excellent video

[@sabarehmanqureshi8492]

Thanks for the lesson . It was great.

[@edgarcrisostomo7062]

Thank you for help me you are a great teacher

[@MohammedMansor32]

Thank you, this is easy and useful :)

[@igorklimov9481]

thank you very much, it's a most helpful lesson

[@mohanadalwadth1752]

Thanks for your great information.

[@variantcourt9013]

I needed this to ask my sis for her laptop

[@jennykim3246]

I like this video! Thank you~^^

[@adamisakadam7116]

Thanks so much this is a great lesson i got many important ideas

[@avatarLT]

great video, thanks ;)

[@sarettayap5727]

*YES OR YES*

[@yiridium]

i just wanted to learn how to say yes

[@omandari1469]

you are a great teacher I love it your lesson and I hope to be teacher like you after 4 years because now I am studying in collage and my major is English language

[@benhassenayadi4514]

salut je suis débitant je veux maîtriser l'anglais aidez moi merci

[@mathunnyjose4467]

Some People are smarter by making excuse to say no.. Some even ask same back to us their need is much worse.

[@natouchecabelony7239]

i think that i understand the lesson a little because i have 8/10 for the quiz.Thank you Rebecca

[@mohammedelsahli664]

I get a iPhone thank you

[@mameend]

I found two caption mistakes.

[@engvidRebecca]

+mameend Please report them!

[@mameend]

+Learn English with Rebecca [engVid RebeccaESL] 　"when you ask (them) for something."

[@mikeymcallister5342]

Did not work

[@iiasminsita]

Thanks so much for the video, Rebecca. I just have a question What's the difference between lend and borrow? Why did you say "lend me 5 and borrow 250?" Is not the same if I say lend me 5 and lend me 250? Or borrow 5 and borrow 250? Hope you can help me with that :)

[@maurosup4321]

I am not sure. But I think that, borrow is used for who received the loan (money in this case)." I... Borrow". And lend is used for who made the loan (who gives the money.). "You lend me". In spanish Borrow : Pedir prestado. lend: Prestar.

[@tsts7036]

we can say: would you lend me $5 OR Can I borrow $5 from you hope this clears the idea

[@EDMRIPPER]

I need someone to practice my english ,anyone?

[@user-zn8iz1xi9i]

let go. what do you exactly need?

[@RwandaVoiceTv]

Do you need somebody ? By visual, auditory,

[@thevlogkids2223]

I'm just watching this so that I can see my best friend that I never got to say goodbye to. I need to see her lol

[@Alphawolf-pk5bi]

I'mma dislike if it doesn't work

[@ghaidaalhaj2829]

Thanks

[@msh4166]

Thank You So Much

[@RwandaVoiceTv]

Thx ma'am Rebecca from Kigali Rwanda Africa

[@RakibHasan-rp8he]

Thanks