Enneagram Types 6 and 9 in a Relationship Explained

[@breakingthesinglemomstigma5339]

Man, I’d love to get a more nuanced video about counterphobic 6s in relationships and life. I feel like most people do brief overviews and mention it, but being a counterphobic 6 has often left me feeling a bit lost. If ever you feel like doing a deep dive, I’m here for it! Thanks for producing all these videos!

[@YouveGotaType]

I could do a few hours on the intricacies of 6ness for sure. Someday ;)

[@jenhiltyjones]

I’m a self pres 9x1 and my husband is a counter phobic 6 (not sure about his wings or instinct) and so much of this video felt true. He definitely tries to get a reaction out of me and when we blow up it’s big. I thought it was interesting that the 6 typically puts more effort into the relationship because it’s the opposite with us. A 9 and a 6 can be kind of a rollercoaster.

[@hollyniemand3645]

I really appreciate your ability to explain things in a very clear and structured way! I think that’s a very good analysis! I probably am a 9 and was raised by a 6. Usually I really like 6s and feel understood by them, because they also tend to think a lot and consider others, before making decisions. And they also like to keep things peaceful, so they usually confront you in a considerate way, when there is a problem.

[@YouveGotaType]

Thanks for the kind words! And for sharing your personal experience of the 9/6 type combo

[@mariahmier9313]

Your videos have been insanely helpful for me. I’ve been writing a book series for the past few years and after feeling a bit stuck I figured out the enneagram types for my cast of characters. To my delight, my cast has a really even spread across all types and this tool is really helping me add consistency and believability to their personalities over the series. The relationship series here is really helping me flesh out a love triangle where a 3 and a 6 are in love with the same 9. I was afraid that I had mistyped my characters but your videos have made me confident that I actually did use the enneagram correctly. I can’t wait to watch the rest of this relationship series! Keep up the good work! You’re saving me from my writer’s block, dude!

[@silverfox3195]

I can’t wait for more sixes and other types! This channel is by far the best Enneagram-related one I’ve seen. If anyone recommends others let me know!

[@sofiagabler8325]

What a wealth of information! Thank you.

[@YouveGotaType]

My pleasure!

[@nceleste63]

Love this channel! Has helped me understand personality dynamics immensely! Thank you so much!

[@YouveGotaType]

So glad to hear it!

[@CuddleClaw.]

6 and 9 are in my Tri-type so this was fun to listen to because I can relate to both. I can’t wait for you to do 4 with 4 in relationship!!! And 4 and 5 is another I like, but is far more challenging.

[@YouveGotaType]

Glad you enjoyed it! I'm actually skipping the dual type relationships though, as I did the Relationship Overview series (5 things to know) and that pretty much covers what a dual type relationship can expect. But the 4-5 combo will be coming up in just a few months! Stay tuned :)

[@CuddleClaw.]

@@YouveGotaType thank you!

[@aridmcb]

Great video - lots of insights and tangible advice

[@YouveGotaType]

Thanks so much!

[@sinanunel5489]

Great video and very helpful. I wish there were also a 3 and 6 relationship analysis.

[@YouveGotaType]

Thanks! And the 3-6 combo is coming soon so stay tuned!

[@Doopydoopydoo]

I’m a so9 and my husband is a sx6. I’m almost too agreeable and it’s brought a lot of frustration on his end. Your point of “the 6 will try to get a reaction out of the 9” is spot on. I’ll have a neutral face to show that I’m absorbing information and he will see it as me not caring 🫠 We don’t fight often, but when we do it can be really bad. That Reactive-Positivity Triad blend is frustrating, but I’m glad we share the Attachment Triad. Of all triads to share, this one is pretty great. We’ve both had to work to bring up concerns instead of stewing on them and it has made us feel safer in our relationship. I liked your advice a lot! Thanks for the always helpful and well constructed videos! 😊

[@YouveGotaType]

Thanks so much for sharing your personal experience of this enneagram combo! Always great to hear the specifics of what stands out. And so glad to hear it was a helpful/enjoyable watch :)

[@jerrysstories711]

Well, who do 9's NOT get along with well? That's kind of what they do, get along with others. What's the worst pairing for them?

[@YouveGotaType]

It's not so much about 9s not getting along with another type, but moreso other types being more prone to enable the 9s less healthy traits based on their ego fixation.

[@elainetang8504]

Hey just wanted to say that it’s really helpful

[@YouveGotaType]

Glad to hear it :)

[@GabrielKerr]

This is 100% my parents. They are separated now, but this makes an incredible amount of sense as to why. Helps me process it better.

[@YouveGotaType]

Glad it helps, definitely a tough couple to separate so it must've been tough.

[@pointerdogmarketing2197]

Ok, I'm probably a self-preservation 9, but I also relate a lot to the self-preservation 6.

[@quiptheip]

My partner is a solid 6 and I’m trying to figure out what I am. I think I’m a 9 as I embody so many traits of other numbers, but this video does explain aspects of my relationship very well!!

[@YouveGotaType]

Worth diving into this video if you're still on the fence about being a 9 or not! Complete Guide to Type 9: kzbin.info/www/bejne/mpy8g2mYlM2Ig7M

[@jerrysstories711]

I remember you said you were going to do all 36 combinations in this series. But that's all the types paired with some other type. Are you going to talk about when each type pairs with it's own? Are those pairs rare? Or doomed? I'm curious which types get along best/worse with their own type.

[@YouveGotaType]

I'm skipping the dual type episodes because I already did the "5 Things to Know" relationship overviews which basically covers what two of the same types will need to navigate. Also, there is no "best/worst" ranking for enneagram type relationships, but I will mention in each episode how common or uncommon the pairing is if they are a rare or super frequent pairing. I'm a believer that two healthy individuals can make it work no matter their enneagram type, MBTI, etc. etc. they identify with (aka no pair is doomed ;)

[@haleybenefield473]

Look, I didn't come here to be attacked... Jokes aside, this was really insightful. Seemed to hit the nail right on the head.

[@YouveGotaType]

Haha glad to hear it ;)

[@cool1234881]

I'm probably a nine and I think from video my boss's probably a six. In a nutshell, the guy really needs a beer and I really need some coffee.

[@AshleyChing-c3o]

6 and 9 most common!

[@smitakdhar5040]

What if I am confused between this two types

[@YouveGotaType]

Watch these: Type 6 Complete Guide: kzbin.info/www/bejne/oJTNhItqpq2Vb7s Type 9 Complete Guide: kzbin.info/www/bejne/mpy8g2mYlM2Ig7M

[@yay29823]

I can't wait until we get to the 8 and 2 relationship. The dad and the mom lol

[@YouveGotaType]

It's coming up shortly!

[@flamango4660]

Nice

[@yessumify]

So cool, I just figured my husband is a 6 and I'm a 9. At least I think he is a 6. I'm still figuring it out.

[@damoncarr4931]

You say something about you thinking that the 6 benefiting more from the relationship but I think it’s the other way around lol. The 6 does a lot of the heavy lifting in a 6 & 9 relationship and the 9 is not too healthy they can just be a passenger Princess in life with a 6 that has to take care of everything for them. Other than that I think they can have a beautiful relationship.

[@ragestarshine5735]

Not me being a 9 and you calling out my blood type 😂😂😂

[@YouveGotaType]

haha 🎯