entitled exes on AITA that had the AUDACITY - REACTION

[@itsjustme4848]

It’s not hard to explain to kids why they can’t go on a Disney cruise. “We can’t afford it.” I heard that a lot as a kid.

[@SoManyRandomRamblings]

Exactly. We never went either. Life isn't fair, if kids aren't taught that ...then later on down the road we get one of the many species of Karen out there.

[@OrontesRM]

This. I understood "costs too much" when I was a child. At least since primary school age. I understand you can't reason with the 3 y.o. but the other kids will get it. There isn't much to explain.

[@vanovasmith9586]

Same! And my dad and stepmom usually made up for it. A camping trip away from electronics, spending family time together, and getting to meet a lot of wild creatures was just as fun! Or we'd go out to a local park and have a picnic. Plus it also teaches them to be honest and open. And kids take "we can't afford it" a load better than a lot of other excuses parents make up.

[@StrangeFacinations]

I never had a vacation as a kid. One time we went to a church in a different town.

[@mlledj22]

Totally agree. Sometimes that "understanding" as a child makes you work harder to not be in that position as an adult, and neither will your future family.

[@Lovinia1]

First story is the definition of “don’t set yourself on fire to keep others warm.”

[@autumn1734]

Wow I love this!!!

[@cakeisavegatable]

Great saying

[@crystalerickson6962]

Never heard this one before but it definitely is appropriate.

[@gloriousmediocrity985]

The $50k left to the parents of the last story was 100% done to make that Will air-tight. I used to work for an attorney and he would ask his clients for a list of people who might have a claim on their money but they didn't want the people to get any of it. In the Will, the client would leave those people $1. They were mentioned in the Will so they had no basis to claim they were forgotten and $1 was a very decisive F-you to that person.

[@SoManyRandomRamblings]

Exactly

[@candicemorgan979]

😂😂😂 love the $1.... I would even be tempted to make it $0.01 😂😂😂 or $1 from Zimbabwe (which is worthless currency) 😂😂😂

[@LoveShackSarah88]

My shithead grandfather left $1 to my mother, my mother sent the $1 back to his child bride (she was 32 he was 85) with a note that said "since the 2nd wife blew through all of the property and assets my parents owned you need this $1 more than I do, cheers!" My grandfather and his 2nd wife murdered my grandmother, the second wife blew through all of their money and then she dropped dead, no we didn't attend his or her funerals either

[@figstick]

​​@@LoveShackSarah88so your mom felt entitled to Grandpa's money? And got mad she didn't get any? Sounds like Grandpa made the right choice

[@figstick]

​@@LoveShackSarah88child bride at 32? You are so bitter

[@melanies2000]

My parents looked after my great aunt for over a decade. They did everything they could to keep her out of a nursing home (her only wish). Got all her prescriptions, shopping, visited, sometimes with a pet as she loved animals. And near the end they even moved her into their house, with nurses coming in multiple times a day including early morning and late night. And when she passed and they got more than my aunt who did nothing for her, she accused us of manipulating and stealing her money. I suppose doing nice things must seem manipulative if you're a selfish horrible person 🙃

[@NurseKayP]

When you take on a responsibility like that you never know how long it will be for. My dad was the black sheep and his two sisters were the golden children in my grandfathers eyes. When my grandfather couldn’t take care of himself anymore due to dementia and I mean doing things like putting the car in drive instead of reverse and knocking the stairs off my dad moved in to take care of him. His daughters had little to nothing to do with him. My grandfather left my dad the house, but my dad ended up taking care of him for like 10 years because he lived into his 90s. My grandfather still looked at his daughters as if they were angels even though they did nothing, but my dad did get the house at least. The girls didn’t care because they didn’t want the responsibility anyway.

[@lilmamma2719]

Yep. Exactly this.

[@jeanams07]

Just to clarify for the story about the guy who has 5 kids and only makes $30k a year... He commented in the post that he did cheat with his current wife and got her pregnant, and that is why him and his ex divorced (for those of you that noticed that his youngest son with the ex is 10 years old and his oldest with the current wife is 9). That is why he thinks she is doing all of this to be "spiteful" 😂. He really just can't understand that she knows she is so much better off without him, and doesn’t give a crap about anything to do with him other than giving their two sons the best life she can provide for them.

[@margodphd]

He fd around and found out. I'm sorry for the new kids.

[@MadFretsy24]

Wow, shit just keeps piling up. His ex is soooooo much better off without him.

[@kindofyoung]

I knew it! Look at the consequences of his own actions.

[@gemmisco]

It’s been 10 years. Can someone be spiteful for 10 years?

[@aude94]

@@gemmisco People can be spiteful for generations so 10 years is nothing 😂

[@lottieew135]

I'm so happy the grandparents left such a huge amount of inheritance to OP! Definitely a "play stupid games, win stupid prizes" mood 🤣

[@PunguinYoga]

I agree. People can get really ugly and unreasonable when it comes to inheritance money. I have some relatives whose fighting over an estate was frightening. It made me ashamed to a be a human being. Taking care of the elderly has to be very difficult. She EARNED that twelve million!

[@katiecakesl4691]

Story 2: Notice the age of the kids. Youngest male is 10, oldest daughter is 9. A baby takes 9 months to make. OP was married a year later....either OP accidentally knocked up the first woman he met or more likely OP thinks the wife is 'Spiteful' because OP had an affair and now she is better without him in every way.

[@NanaGuedesI]

That's an interesting take. It does raise a few questions when I think about it. And my guy did nothing to increase his family budget, nor did his wife, and now he's mad his ex is doing pretty great and just living her best life.

[@esthermcafee5293]

Exactly what I was thinking! I wonder if OPs current wife thought she was getting a sugar daddy, but ended up with a Splenda sponsor instead?

[@Good.Morning.Petty.Potatoes]

​@@esthermcafee5293Splenda Sponsor 😂 I'm totally using that.

[@graciouslyloved10]

😂😂😂😂​@@esthermcafee5293

[@Joannapinka17]

Why is his wife a sahw when he makes $30k? 😂 like bro you don’t have the income for that ish. They make almost nothing and his wife is staying home? His bad financial judgement is not her problem

[@kenziehansen2424]

Johns ex wife is a literal angel/saint. Helping john out and taking care of his grandparents😢 she deserves every cent and more!!❤

[@00imstella00]

From a fellow 30-something non-driver, thank you for being so candid about it. Driving sucks! I can’t drive due to some type of undiagnosed learning disability (spent 14 years learning. Can’t process what’s going on fast enough to react accordingly), and I’m fed up of people treating me like a bum because of it. Some of us can’t, some of us just hate it. Both are perfectly fine 🤷‍♀️

[@complainer406]

Non-driver by choice here. Sold my car and been loving it. Rather than sit in traffic on my commute, I sit on the train and read a book

[@bangbangbaby1988]

I'm also in my mid-30s and can't drive! Started learning at 17 and failed 3 tests! Decided it wasn't for me. It's a much more environmentally friendly way to live and here in the UK you see wonderful views on trains! If people are treating you like a bum then it's the universe's way of telling you those people aren't worth your time hun 💅

[@GogiRegion]

To be fair, where I live, it’s insanely unsafe to do anything but drive. Sidewalks don’t connect, so you have to walk on roads with near highway speeds. I take medication that prevents me from driving, so I have to schedule my day around when I drive. If I had the option to not drive, I would, but I don’t.

[@fruzihorvath8230]

I got my license 3 months ago. I am 39 years of age. Nothing wrong with that. I was having the same issues as you with my little old manual car that I tried learning on for a full year. Then I tried driving an automatic and things just clicked. So got myself a new car that is automatic and pretty much do everything automatically, like turning on the lights, wipers etc with lots of sensors. It changed my whole driving experience! I am now driving alone. Being super careful and all and if I get overwhelmed I just stop and take a breather. But all good. Nothing wrong with not driving either! I don't mind taking the bus or train or whatever if it takes me where I need to go!

[@sailorsallyrockinrarity2130]

I drive and really love driving. But you know what I do when my car breaks down? I take the bus, rideshare, or carpool. I don't beg my friends and family for money. Not driving is a valid choice!

[@lilash6041]

20:06 the fact she continued to care for them when she didn't have to... speaks volume. She deserved what was given to her. And so does John.

[@thestablepirate]

Well she was the caretaker and John just visited frequently.

[@RKNancy]

She's incredibly nice if she married John even after she knew he was gay and gave up her entire life for the grandparents. The grandparents weren't stupid, they were only kept in the dark. They probably blamed John for divorcing her and blamed the parents for having a fall-out with the son. They knew she gave up the prime of her life just to help them out when their own family didn't, even when she got divorced and had no reason to look after them. I can see why they gave her all the money. I think it would have been a different case if they knew about John being gay though.

[@bridgetcasement6164]

I wonder if grandpa knew that his grandson was gay, and that is why he left the money to the granddaughter in-law. She was kind, and that she would probably share with the grandson. If he left everything to the grandson, it’s possible that he may have been manipulated by the parents to give a bunch of money up?

[@allietone20]

I feel as though they knew John was Gay, and saw how his parents didn't give a crap about them in their end, so they gave everything to OP, knowing she not only deserved it but would share it with their grandson, making it hard for his parents to have any access to the money.

[@pollockm3]

For the inheritance story, she is NTA. While the estate was worth no where near 12 M in my case, I have had this situation recently in my family. My grandma passed 2 months ago and her entire estate was left to her caregivers. Her kids, other grandkids, sister and myself all have no problems with this. The caregivers were nice enough to offer us whatever we would like before they liquidated everything but they had no legal obligation to do so. My grandma had Alzheimer's and would in a blink of an eye, turn nasty and verbally abusive so most of the family were not close to her in the end. Her caregivers took on that abuse and cared for her for 2 years while barely getting paid. They have the right to all the assets since my grandma set it up that way but for being there when family wasn't. That OP didn't have to share it with anyone. Clearly the grandparents loved her very much.

[@analea6531]

Right! She took care of them for free and apparently did a great job so it’s only fair. The fact that they left the mandatory $50K to them means that they knew exactly what they were doing. And at the end of the day that’s their money they are entitled to give it to whoever they judge worthy of it

[@davidvento5481]

Speaking to the description of the grandparents as being “fragickle” I remember my great aunt (probably their age) used that word occasionally so I smiled after not hearing it in many years. I deduced it’s a hybrid word combo of fragile & delicate (= fragikle) as she would describe her good china & porcelain “tchotchkes” as being “very fragickle.” I’ve never heard anyone else say that before so I wonder where (in the US?) they’re from, and if it’s a “regional” thing. She was really a hoot! *RIP Auntie Aggie* _...just sayin’_

[@cc1526]

I think the ONLY argument I can think of in the parents defense on the last story is it sounds like John’s parents paid for their schooling and living expenses while John was in medical school (which is a pretty long time to support a married couple) and because of that, OP was able to devote all her time to taking care of the grandparents. Without the parents money, OP probably would’ve needed a job to support their marriage while John was in school and thus wouldn’t have been able to be a full time caretaker for them. That means she wouldn’t have been a full time caretaker without john’s parents’ financial assistance, which is now being disregarded by the grandparents. Now, with that said, it’s incredibly generous of OP to dedicate her 20s to taking care of her husband’s grandparents when her marriage to their grandson wasn’t born from a romantic love. That takes some serious selflessness. So she definitely deserves the money she got for that. Although I can see how the parents might feel blind-sighted when it was their money that took care of OP and her husband for all those years. I don’t know - inheritance is tough.

[@pollockm3]

​@@cc1526 that can be an argument but really that argument is for Dr. John but OP is the one left with the inheritance. OP did split it with him later but that was her choice not the grandparents. Legally what the parents did was a gift to their son and unless they had a contract no judge would say Dr. John has an obligation to pay them back for that gift just because he is now disowned. After the divorce OP lived with the grandparents so they were supporting her in exchange for her care. I see them knowing she has no other education or skills and no other support system so they wanted to gift her with financial security.

[@cc1526]

@@pollockm3 omg I was wondering why I couldn’t find my comment anywhere.. I meant to make it it’s own comment. Lol I’m so dumb. Sorry about that 😅

[@sseonghwaa7076]

Second story: 30k a year is barely enough to support a single person let alone a family of five. OP needs to focus his energy on earning more money instead of being bitter that the ex-wife is better off without him. All but the youngest kid is school aged so the new wife should probably start looking to get a job if their finances are that bad. The youngest kid with the ex being 10 and the oldest with the new wife being 9 makes me think OP cheated on the ex. He's trash all around.

[@katharineeavan9705]

wouldn't be surprised if he's the type that likes to keep 'em preggo and unemployed for control reasons or projected fears about cheating. Bet the second wife is younger than him and didn't so much decide to be a stay at home mum as end up being one by default after being pregnant/having babies to look after for several years solid and he convinced her no one would hire her after the gap and/or childcare costs would make it pointless. It's jut a guess, but it would explain why she's still a SAHM when they apparently can barely afford heating - not many people would choose to stay a housewife while their family struggles that way as even if they were the selfish type, staying home all day in a heat-rationed house isn't fun

[@rachelmaddowswife8713]

Yeah, something really isn't adding up here. Presumably he would have mentioned if there was a reason for his low salary, like he recently became disabled and is working part time, or just lost a business or something. A 38 year old man shouldn't be working a 9-5 for minimum wage, by that time you could have moved up the ladder to earn $60k in nearly any field, even retail. If your plan is to be a father of five with a stay at home spouse (and you don't have a trust fund), you should plan ahead and build a career that's earning at least 6 figures by middle age. Sounds like the ex made a smart choice to drop this dead weight.

[@katharineeavan9705]

@@rachelmaddowswife8713 I mean, plenty of people can't escape minimum wage these days, but if that's the situation you're in then you straight up can't afford to support a stay-at-home partner, and the fact that he's upset that his ex is better off than this family when they're seemingly actively choosing to prioritise his wife staying at home over their family being financially stable speaks volumes. It's their choice to make, but this attitude over it is petty and ridiculous. Like, dude, just tell your kids you can't afford that stuff because you decided that having mummy at home to look after them was better for your family than having extra money. Either stick by your convictions on what's right for your family or admit that you need to re-evaluate.

[@rachelmaddowswife8713]

@@katharineeavan9705 Honest question though, what 38 year old man do you know, who has been in this country for over a decade and isn't disabled, has literally no choice but to work minimum wage? He couldn't have gone back to get a degree before starting his second family? He couldn't have worked hard to get promoted to shift manager? I know people who work low wage, no college degree required jobs, and if they show up on time, sober, and have any kind of people skills at all they get promoted. They might not be wealthy, but they're earning more than minimum wage. Edited to add: if you've been in the workforce for multiple decades and there's a legit reason you can't make a living wage, at some point you should get a vasectomy.

[@thamertanner5448]

@@rachelmaddowswife8713 I know SO MANY! Like almost every guy I know honestly. I don't know a single person with a good job male or female. I had an ex that made $22 an hour which was the max for his position (factory work) and that's the most I've ever seen anyone my age make. I'm 34 btw. I'm disabled and only get around $11k a year. Minimum wage is the only option for the majority of people. But no financial literacy and lack of education are huge factors in this that can't be overlooked. I had an ex who dropped out in 8th grade due to ADHD and dyscalculia and not having any support, mom "homeschooled" him instead. Unfortunately he never learned to take care of himself, can't function as an adult and can't hold down a job because he refuses to treat or manage any of his disorders and mental illnesses. He lost his last job cuz he kept forgetting to attend the mandatory training classes then failed the tests that they need to pass every 6 months to stay certified. A LOT of men are in similar positions. The mental health crisis in this country plays a big part.

[@MariaAlicia10298]

The last story reminds me of this one story where this waitress was the ONLY one who’d serve this very bitter & mean old man in a restaurant & did so for months & she was the only one who showed him kindness despite of his cruel words & poor attitude but when he died, he left everything to that waitress, & he was rich. The old man’s family was angry & tried taking it from her but I think she kept it all in the end. It’s so wild how that woman continued being nice to the old man after he was always so rude yet, he had left everything to her, a stranger but someone who showed him kindness after how he treated her. Crazy.

[@Elizabeth912-v6o]

That's a lie and never happens in real life!!!!!

[@MariaAlicia10298]

Ummm it actually did lol & it’s not the first time someone rich has done that. It’s called having shitty family lol. 8 billion people on this planet & you really think that never happens?🤣🤣🤣 OKAY.👌🏻

[@JoTracy]

​@@Elizabeth912-v6o it does My ex MIL inherited a huge house from her cranky old neighbour that she was kind to

[@dancingdark4527]

My dad has been waiting for ‘his’ inheritance for decades. I once told him my grandma will live to 100 just to spite him. She turned 101 in Oct and her time in a very fancy old folks home means there is no more money.

[@traceyvanklingeren7563]

good

[@raabbibi]

May she lives even longer in happiness and comfort 🙏🏾

[@ACEVERYLASTPART]

Good, seriously. People like this are disgusting. “Waiting” for his inheritance is a really nice way of saying waiting for his mother to die so he can have whatever she didn’t spend

[@KitKat10281]

​@ACEVERYLASTPART absolutely! My mom isn't rich, but is definitely well-off. I would rather she live in her currently-very-comfortable lifestyle until the day I die, then peacefully pass with nothing, than lose her anytime soon just to inherit any money that might come my way! I'll take more time with my mama any day over any kind of inheritance! I love my mom with all my heart though- something a lot of "gold diggers seem to be missing the plot on. ❤

[@Galworld761]

My parents assets are NOT my retirement plan. Stop banking on money you didn’t earn.

[@marilishr5978]

The editing… chef kiss 😅 Anderson Paak “this b*+ch” had me rolling 🤣🤣🤣

[@Thehouseoffail]

Honestly, just canceling the vacation was a pretty stand up thing to do. If he was the a-hole, he would have gone without her, or invited someone else, or agreed to pay but only if she pays for the next one. Instead, he just accepted that he might not get the vacation he wants because his wife is supporting her son and ex-husband. Which is a pretty solid thing to do.

[@Natori-r9d]

Yeah . If I were OP, I would be a bit mad at the wife that she had spent the money on her ex-husband, and that's why they can't go on vacation. Would been OK(ish) to help out the son, though, but not the exhusband. They need boundaries and couples therapy.

[@cbk7744]

Those parents were just waiting for the grandparents to croak, huh? The fact that they went ahead and made business plans for the inheritance they thought was coming their way is just disgusting... they're literal vultures!

[@delphinerwemalika5614]

Exactly what I was thinking... That's the part that disgust and shock me the most in that story

[@SylentTiger]

And they're stupid to boot. If you make plans, wait until you have the money in hand first.

[@lizzyblitz07]

​@@SylentTiger True. There's a difference in making plans and acting on plans. By the bitterness I'm guessing they've already acted

[@babyjane7109]

I love the last story. It is absolutely amazing how much respect the "couple" had for each other. That is true love. Good for John and OP. ❤

[@lorilancaster5917]

I hope OP reads all these comments from her and other posts and understands that she doesn’t owe the ex in-laws anything. They made their bed they can lie in it. Hope for the best for John and his bf. I hope for the best with OP moving forward.

[@jesclifford88]

I wonder how much money she gave to John, he did abandon them also and don’t believe she should’ve shared a lot with him. They’d have left him more if they’d wanted to

[@LoveK1]

@@jesclifford88that’s what I thought. Why would she give home anything? I would have kept it all and disappeared. He became a user in the end too.

[@smoothsailin9351]

yesss!!!

[@barneyDcaller]

​@@LoveK1agree, but op has a kind heart and she never expect that inheritance either, so she choose to split it with john which is somewhat her ex husband and a family member, and not to John's parents which are awful

[@lelandd.295]

Story 1: Do not cancel but go on the trip alone. Either it will make her realize you are serious about this and stop bailing out her adult kid and her ex, or this will be the end of your marriage.

[@TheBaumcm]

I think ex might be weaponizing guilt. They don’t really go into why ex is ex or why kid was with dad most of his life but many moms would feel guilty over that.

[@lemons2135]

She expects him to indirectly bail out her ex? Madness

[@alexissteele5274]

Send her pic of the solo vacation too!

[@minini5571]

No self-respecting man would ask his ex-wife for money. Period.

[@ZMich8]

2nd story, he is either shooting bullets or he cheated on his ex wife because the fact that his youngest to his first wife is 10 and the oldest to the second wife is 9, there was some overlapping and the fact that he married the second wife one year later….

[@2thick_2_B_a_slim_chick]

RIGHT!? I WAS THINKING THE SAME THING!!, And she bossed up and leveled up on his cheating butt.

[@izzy6455]

Yes... 'married late' (i think that was this story) what did that mean....? More to this story!

[@kirashields7383]

Definitely suspicious. Even if the 10 year old is nearly 11, and the 9 year old just turned 9, that would've meant he got Ex wife pregnant, and either cheated with Wife 2 during late pregnancy/baby was a newborn, or left Ex wife around the time of the birth, and immediately gotten Wife 2 pregnant. If the ages are closer together, like closer to a year apart, he's definitely cheated, because then there's overlap there. And then marrying Wife 2 a year after divorcing ex wife. If my maths is correct? 😆And now he is pissy that Ex wife is doing well for herself and also spending it on the sons as well as herself, whereas he's struggling to afford for him, Wife 2 and 3 girls. Either find a better job or wife 2 go back to work too, sucks but you gotta do what you gotta do. It's not wife 1's fault.

[@danigrl917]

​@@izzy6455I think he meant he married a year later. He just forgot the "r." It depends on when the kids' birthdays are. With my own siblings (same biological mother and father), one sister was born in January, and the other July the following year. They're 18 months apart, but for half of the year, their ages would only seem like one year apart. I'm not disputing that the OP does seem like he's the a**hole (it seems he's jealous of what his ex-wife has been able to accomplish), but the ages of the children don't necessarily mean he cheated.

[@Dhestroyer13]

You’re right. OP later commented admitting that he cheated on his first wife while she was pregnant with their youngest son and got the second wife pregnant. That was the cause of the divorce and why he assumes that she is being spiteful.

[@katmadison7607]

Quick rundown: My Dad was diagnosed with 2 types of terminal cancers. 4 months later, one of my sisters was diagnosed with terminal cancer. I took care of my Dad, 24/7, for 2 years. My mom moved to my sister's to take care of her. My other 2 sisters never even called and checked on them. My oldest sister thought she would be in charge of my sister's $2 million life insurance for her surviving 3 daughters and 4 granddaughters. My sister chose me and my mom. My dad shifted all inheritance to me. One sister came to say "goodbye" to my dying sister when Lofe Flight flew her back to our home to die. She walked right by my dad and told my mom to "f*ck off" when my mom informed her we were executors. My other sister flew in to say goodbye and when she found out she was out of the will, she called the cops and told them I was killing my Dad. I have had 4 people come out to investigate. My dad died 7 weeks after my sister. Neither of my surviving sisters even called my Mom. They just doubled down on calling cops to say I killed my dad and am abusing my mom. I will NEVER consider myself the a**hole when it comes to me blocking them, getting a restraining order on them, etc. I did fake that I "bought a new car with my inheritance" and posted the pics to Facebook, knowing they would see it. It felt good to crush them. 😊😊

[@PunguinYoga]

I'm not sure anything is uglier than the fights over inheritance money. It happened in my family and I was embarrassed by the sleazy tactics. Luckily I wasn't directly involved.

[@NatalyaCherry]

Condolences on so much loss in such a short time, as well as on the so-called sisters who are dead to you figuratively speaking.

[@freecountry3544]

Terrible.

[@mariamariafujoshiinurarea2524]

Omg what did I just read ?!! I am so sorry that you went through all of this , no words are enough to describe how much of a wonderful person you are ❤

[@justwonder1404]

Good God, that's rough. Can't imagine having such rats for siblings, I'm so sorry for your losses. Take care of yourself.

[@thesparkster]

Yep. The $50K is to help prevent a contested will, but it does not guarantee the parents won't try contesting it anyway. One other trick is to will someone an amount and add a caveat that if they were to contest the will, the amount they will receive would be reduced to just $1.

[@Alliemariedesigns]

Can we take a moment to appreciate Charlotte’s editor, please! These memes are always on point, and I know it’s not easy to find that perfect meme to go with a subject 😭🤣 I keep a meme folder for work and even then it’s always still growing haha

[@SylentTiger]

I don't care about grandparents' will. OP is amazing for taking care of them and caring enough to stay and service them after the divorce when she wasn't required. As she stated, because she knew they were fragile and she didn't want them to be affected negatively. I feel she has a big heart. I worry about OP having to deal with the loss of those people she cared for and loved.

[@julesfoster3289]

Ok but the last story I was expecting John to be mad that OP was keeping the money but no, OP split it with John and it's his homophobic parents who are upset. Good for OP and John, I hope they live happily ever after as besties.

[@PunguinYoga]

Seriously! I bet they do.

[@BeeWhistler]

Yeah, they were friends and knew the truth about each other. I’d expect them to communicate better than he would with parents who not only couldn’t accept him as he was but who also cared more about their parents’ money than their well-being. I’m not close with my mom but I also don’t expect some big windfall when she passes.

[@agent57]

I was also worried it was gonna be an issue between John and OP but I'm glad they've figured it all out. Sucks to have disowned your newly wealthy son for stupid reasons, huh? 😆

[@JutlandAngel]

It wouldn't surprise me if it was OP that asked John to marry her to cover for his ✨gayness✨

[@OrontesRM]

yeah me too, instead they split the inheritance. Childhood friends are better than siblings, sometimes.

[@jeanvignes]

My father's fourth wife cared for him in some pretty challenging ways (medical stuff I won't elaborate upon here) for a period of years. When he left her everything I thought, "Good. She earned every penny." I know other family members were hurt/upset but frankly if someone is prepared to be 24/7 caretaker to an elder with many health issues, then they deserve to be rewarded for those hundreds of hours of "free" labor. Paying round-the-clock nurses would have been very expensive, too. I know from other families that just hiring, supervising, covering for, etc. round-the-clock nurses is also very stressful and draining. Whoever is there for that kind of effort -- with the patience it requires, too -- deserves a large inheritance. Dropping by with some fruit now and then -- or sending the occasional card -- just isn't going to cut it.

[@SoManyRandomRamblings]

As someone who took care of their quadriplegic mother, i agree wholeheartedly. Sadly my brother feels that since he's a breeder he needs everything...sadly my father is very easily manipulated, so i know i will get close to nothing when he passes, but it doesn't change my desire to care for him properly. I am glad you viewed things reasonably. Wishing you all the best in all your endeavors.

[@ramachandra776]

The second OP is being ridiculous. I think he is jealous of her ex-wife's success after the divorce and feels somewhat entitled to some portion of her money . Probably like Britney Spears and kevin federline .

[@PAVLlNA]

Please tell me what does OP stand for?

[@bellabirdley]

it stands for "original poster"@@PAVLlNA

[@athena6227]

@@PAVLlNA it’s something like original poster, the original person who posts a story

[@patty-pat-pat]

the 2nd story is SO RIDICULOUS! He remarried within a year and knocked another woman up 3 more times (while saying 'mY eX StaYeD sIngLe'). Maybe if you didnt knock a woman up over & over & over you would be able to afford life bro. She went & made something of herself while the dude pushed his new wife & kids into poverty & struggles with his 30k per year paycheck.

[@noxteryn]

But if one parent makes significantly more money than the other, shouldn't they pay child support for the other parent? If one parent can afford extravagant holidays while the other can barely afford heating (which was literally OP's words), then how is that a fair situation for the child? It will create an undue burden on one parent, and the child will obviously start to show preference for the wealthier parent, since they will be cold in one home and warm in the other. It's not fair.

[@ritahortin6769]

Mom to the rescue... I knew a lady who had a son who always mooched off of his mom. She said, "I couldn't get my wallet out fast enough". After her son's divorce, her daughter-in-law totally blamed her, and she admitted that it was her fault because she always bailed him out.

[@BelievingIsSeeingSilenceSpeaks]

@15:12 my dad ended up having to do this while going through the entire custody battle between him and my biological mom, in fact it was so bad that he not only had a legit notebook full but a calendar of all her missed dates for visitation, all the times she kept us beyond her allowed time-frame, and so on. Keep track of EVERYTHING.

[@momcat2223]

Oof, that last one. The grandparents were elderly, not idiotic. It's _entirely_ possible they already knew John was a gay man because - news flash - homosexuality wasn't "invented" in the 20th century. When John's parents say the grandparents would have "gone ballistic" had they known, it sounds like projection [and attempted manipulation] to me. Sounds like OP was more 'family' to the grandparents than anyone else in this tale and she 'earned' the inheritance, much to the chagrin of the parents who counted their chickens afore they hatched, so to speak. Absolutely NTA.

[@SonjaElizabethTeal]

That first sentence!! Brava!!👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾 And yes indeed to the rest also!🎉❤🎉❤

[@LillianBartlesby]

Even if it had been "invented" in the 20th century, they would still be aware of it because they were alive for *most* of the 20th century. They were even young for it.

[@TheTsuryuu]

that whole story is made up for me, it's just basically the plot for knives out with a gay twist.

[@RobinJay1939]

​@@TheTsuryuuunfortunately, will disputes are not a thing of fiction. People get nasty once money's involved

[@TheTsuryuu]

​@@RobinJay1939 unfortunately, people that lie for attention on the internet aren't as well so... Do you know this people?

[@alira9990]

When my parents died my younger sister was the executer of the will. I had seen both my parents wills because I lived with them the last 4 years they were alive. Each kid (3 of us) was supposed to get equal amounts around $85000 each. My sister tried sending me a cheque for $7500 and my other sister $10000. We went to probate court where the younger sister lied about not having the paperwork any longer. The thing is the lawyer she used to try to cheat us was subpoena to the court hearing. He brought in all the paperwork my sister "lost". The judge looked at the amounts we all should have received and sided with my eldest sister and I. The thing is my younger sister already spent most of the money on a new house and car. The judge made her sell everything she had bought and give my other sister and I our money. It made the younger sister have to move into an apartment after owning her own home for more than 15 years because she sold it to move into the new place. She also lost thousands of dollars on selling her new house and the new car. When all the money was split like it was supposed to be, my eldest sister and I got our money and my younger sister ended up with less than $3000 in total. It's been a couple of years and my eldest sister and I no longer speak to our sister even though both my sisters work in the same office at the McCains head office. I kept $20000 for myself and put the rest into trust funds for my grandkids when they either go to university or buy their first home. By the time they are old enough to get the money it should be close to $60000 each.

[@neurospicyrainbow]

lol I laughed at the first story. at 23, I was living in section 8; holding down 3 jobs; and taking the bus/subway to and from the city. gotta do what you gotta do! you have inspired me to share my own AITA story.

[@bott3849]

Yeah any 23 year old who isnt working is a bum

[@manyharmons4308]

I'm 24 and not working. I help my family farm tho and have social disorders.

[@darcydevenus]

@@manyharmons4308 that isn't not working. You're working. I hope your parents pay you for your work.

[@ikkelimburg3552]

Story 2: absolutely the A! He didn’t waste any time knocking up another one after the divorce, in effect leaving a toddler and baby behind. Then, 3 kids on a 30K income, decides it’s a good idea to have two more children with the new wife (Willing to bet a large sum on ‘upgraded former side piece)who’s idea of a career is ‘stay at home mom’ and ‘taking care of the children’. In what universe would the ex wife even give a single F about their ‘feelings’, taking care of a baby and a toddler on her own (and two weekends a month ‘off duty’) AND providing for her kids and herself?!

[@esecretlangel9130]

Stories 2 & 3: Don’t have children, if you don’t know how to support them. Story 4: the parents expected the money, please tell me OP made an update where the parents decided to spend their lottery winnings before buying the ticket.

[@JubeiKibagamiFez]

That last segment reminded me of Knives Out. Rich grandparents with a couple of spoiled children. OP's ex John most likely only got 50K because he stopped visiting when the rest of the family disowned him. Elderly people take those types of things very seriously. At least OP was kind enough to share the inheritance with John.

[@PunguinYoga]

OP was very generous.

[@achildofgodsanchez9608]

Nonetheless 50k is still quite alot.. be happy you got $100.. no one owes anyone their money/assets.. think of it as a gift/blessing. When my parents die I don’t expect a dime because I didn’t work for it & i don’t care for them & the poor parenting I received..

[@PunguinYoga]

@@achildofgodsanchez9608 I was not especially close to my step-father. I was just happy my mother finally found a good man. When he died I was shocked and delighted he actually left me a little money. I really wasn't expecting any and hadn't even thought of the possibility!

[@JubeiKibagamiFez]

@@achildofgodsanchez9608 I understand that. I had the same upbringing, but I grew up poor, there is no liquid assets waiting for me. Now, the state usually takes possession of liquid assets if no inheritance is established or claimed and then the offspring have to fight the state and each other... And that could be a long battle. Most people establish a will just for that purpose.

[@Parenting_neurospicy]

Story 3: I believe the story said that the ex-husband also stopped visiting the grandparents and cut all contact with the family. So if that happened then the grandparents would have felt deserted. It makes sense that they left the money to their caretaker who is with them during the most intimate time of their lives.

[@valeriekhall]

Exactly! If he wasn't even calling (why?), & they hadn't been told he'd been disowned, he *did* abandon them, just to spare himself trying to work around his family. He didn't need to come out to them, but he DID owe them an explanation. OP said she chose to share the inheritance "bc of how his family had treated him," but honestly, how was that different than how he treated his grandparents in the end? Bless her for being generous. As long as she's happy. But she definitely deserved to keep the whole thing scott-free.

[@jeanams07]

​@@valeriekhall Completely agree!! Especially after she had dedicated almost a decade of her life to protecting him and he left her high and dry, and she didn't go after alimony. I really do understand why she didn't just honor the grandparent's wishes of only giving him the $50k. They did that for a reason, and I think they were right to do it.

[@valeriekhall]

@@jeanams07 I mean, I kind of get it; she felt that his awful family forced his hand. I still feel like he could have found a better way to at least let the grandparents know that he's trying not to cause strife over a private matter he doesn't want to get them drawn into by making them "choose sides," & isn't ghosting them. Surely they could have compromised by still enjoying calls/facetimes. But yes, the MOST important point here is that OP spent her *ENTIRE ADULT LIFE* being their caretaker, instead of starting a career. She & John got married at 22, & she's now 32(ish) with zero job history for her entire adult life. Grandparents were absolutely right to repay her for the lifetime career/earnings loss she willingly traded for caring for them. I truly hope she kept the bulk of it, as compensation for lost earnings for over a DECADE of above-&-beyond work. Especially since John is now a DOCTOR, & she is starting from scratch getting a FIRST JOB in her 30's. And she's the one who made all of that possible.

[@rachelsato7953]

I don’t know why John abandoned his grandparents either, it was so weird. And I don’t think he deserves his inheritance either. Like yes - being treated that way is horrible and despicable. And I think the way the justified him ghosting his grandparents was that they were already frail and the news of him being gay would have shocked them. And I guess if his parents are that homophobic, it’s very possible they were raised by homophobic people (ie the grandparents), so maybe he just didn’t want any of them in his life anymore. Which if that’s the case then I agree that John should cut his hateful family out of his life. But the story never said grandparents were homophonic, and she said they were sweet, so even if he didn’t want to shock them by coming out, couldn’t he have visited them still without his boyfriend/new husband and just not told them anything about his sex life? His ex wife worked hard for that money and gave up her life and potential career for them and making sure they were well taken care of, while it sounds like John and his family were perfectly fine having their drama with each other and not giving a damn about their parents/grandparents. So if the grandparents thought John only deserved 50k then no one can tell them what to do with their money, and it was very very generous of op to even share with John.

[@allietone20]

He may have avoided them because of his parents, if they cut him off and are waiting for his grandparents to croak, I do not put it past them to expose him to his grandparents probably resulting in them disowning him as well. So he rather they be mad at him for divorcing his saint of a wife, probably. Just speculating, giving him the benefit of the doubt.

[@HopeHendershot-Moskal]

If the husband really wanted to be an asshole, he could have just gone on vacation by himself and left the wife at home to think about what she's doing.

[@krussell-2000]

🙌🏻🙌🏻

[@jengsci8268]

@HopeSMoskal - Husband might have come home to all his stuff out on the lawn. Or sold.

[@All4MyMr]

​@@jengsci8268Now that is MY kind of PETTY! 😂

[@lorilancaster5917]

@@jengsci8268I was thinking more towards sold.

[@fdm2155]

Yup, that's what I thought too 😂

[@victoriasmith2813]

Story 2: I need to know what online business the ex-wife started that’s earning her 6 figures Also she’s definitely not the AH. That man’s insecure. Ex-wife’s lucky

[@lubaddytwoshoes982]

I just come to hear Charlotte say “Absolutely NOT”.

[@stischer47]

I'm sorry, but if my wife was sending money to support her ex-husband, she'd soon be my ex-wife.

[@klee_.fangirl]

Period

[@KEOSHAANEILIA]

Especially none court ordered and the offspring is an ADULT! wtf?! That’s crazy.

[@Dove96]

I would have issues with that also. Even a 23 year old I would have issues with. Getting the car out of impound? What? He can walk, ride a bike or take the bus.

[@andreear6444]

Then she can also send you money 🌝😂

[@lillybbe0613]

​@@andreear6444😹😹🤣

[@lorilancaster5917]

Story two: So OPs youngest with ex is 10 and oldest with new wife is 9? The math says OP cheated on ex while pregnant or just gave birth and new wife is the AP. If that’s the case, I further have no sympathy for OP.

[@kirashields7383]

Yeah, even if 10 year old was nearly 11, and 9 year old just turned 9, he must've either cheated first few months after ex gave birth, or left not long after birth and immediately got wife 2 pregnant. Or if they're 1 1/2 to 2 years apart, left or cheated on her when baby was a little older, then gotten wife 2 pregnant. Both shitty situations, but I don't feel too sorry for OP. He's complaining ex wife is doing well for herself and their sons, and also giving their sons a good life, sucks they're struggling, but doesn't sound like he's either trying to get a new better job or possibly wife 2 go back to work either, just complaining and sounding like they're jealous. 🫤

[@mandycaz5562]

What's AP?

[@lisamelroy2855]

​@@mandycaz5562I think it means Affair Partner.

[@lazerbehm8681]

Not necessarily, theres a 14 month period where he could have gotten divorced and met with the future wife, and had the other child after his son was born. They would still only be "1 year" apart.

[@lorilancaster5917]

@@mandycaz5562affair partner. Sorry I’ve seen that abbreviation around I forgot it isn’t as common as OP or others

[@alisashebiel8293]

Okay, so I was in a similar situation when I first started dating my, now husband. My son’s father would always hit me up for money, I would cave most of the time just to avoid the grown man temper tantrum and keep the peace. I was so glad when my husband put an end to that because I didn’t have to be the bad guy! Lol.

[@batswanamodipane7774]

I discovered this account a week ago after a terrible break up I've been doing odd things in the house to keep busy having this crazy redhead in my ear dragging people to filth and sometimes giving solid knowledge has really made me laugh a lot! So happy I SUBSCRIBED! ❤

[@althealee9375]

I don’t think I could stay with someone for so long if I didn’t love them, I would just feel like I’m lying to them everyday

[@valeriestory7678]

My mom always told me that if you marry someone just for their money, you'll be working for every penny for the rest of your life.

[@Dove96]

The last story, we just did our wills and yes leaving money to an estranged child was recommended so they could not successfully contest the will.

[@PunguinYoga]

It's a shame you have to do that. But it's smart!

[@aralornwolf3140]

Well... I had an uncle who didn't make a will... so when he died, his estranged daughter was given his entire estate. *Shakes his Head* Dying without a will was the best thing that abusive AH ever did for her, lol.

[@davidguidry657]

While I feel bad for what the ex-wife is experiencing in the third clip, it really isn’t OP’s responsibility to help her out. Especially since she is acting so horribly towards him (saying she should’ve cheated and admitting that she’s using him for money (which apparently isn’t enough for her))! As someone who had to pay the same amount of child support even when experiencing layoffs, medical/legal expenses, and other strains to my finances, I also don’t think that she should expect to have her child support reduced.

[@crIms0ngen]

That one feels partially made up/details altered. It just smells really suspicious that the guy is trying to make himself look like the golden one in the situation.

[@stevnated]

@@crIms0ngen I felt the same.... but who knows. He's probably still bitter (and rightfully so) about the circumstances of the divorce.

[@stevnated]

I don't understand why child support payments don't get adjusted when life circumstances change? I dated a guy once who was barely able to keep up the payments after losing his job and being unable to find another one with the same level of pay. Shouldn't it be re-evaluated from time to time?

[@markbernier8434]

Stayed with him for 3 years for support and tuition, smells like a 304 to me.

[@HeatherWho11.10]

I think it should change when finances do. My brother was ordered to pay $350 a week in child support, when he was making good money. He's been unemployed on and off now for a few years and has had multiple long stints in the hospital, making it impossible to keep up with it.

[@Michelle-oh5ws]

❤Thanks for mentioning that it is NOT shameful to ask for money if you’re struggling! It’s only shameful when you’re being a leech and not helping yourself out.

[@meumnomen]

A hand up is not the same as a hand out

[@christinapalafox]

First story: You gotta show your adult kids that you won't be able to be their safety net ASAP. I had that sort of codependent financial relationship with members of my family. I was a heroin addict. I didn't start taking responsibility for my addiction until my family member cut me off. A few tough years followed, including homelessness of my own making, but I eventually recovered and I'm clean now. If I'd had someone who protected me from the consequences of my actions I never would have gotten clean.

[@toivoa119]

09:20 It is the father being jealous of the income of his ex-wife and then projecting it onto his children.

[@selinesbeau]

Two grown men should be able to afford their expenses between the two of them.

[@sheryltaylor7181]

Being a retired in home caregiver for the elderly I can confirm it is both a physical and mentally challenging job. I loved my job and the people I helped but it left me with medical problems (total knee replacement, bad back) plus the after care one needs for themselves when your person passes (it was never just a job). She may need this money given to her for her own care as she ages and starts to deal with her own medical issues. I'm sure the grandparents could feel the love she had for them and all could see when she stayed to help them complete their lives journey. Not an ahole by any means.

[@smartaMartini]

The grandparents could have left John and his parents $1 each, and they would not have been able to dispute the will. They should be glad they got 50,000!

[@achildofgodsanchez9608]

Seriously!!! I replied something similar. I don’t get why children & grandchildren will fight over the money, house, bank account, expensive assets.. when NONE of it was their’s to begin with. They worked & built all of it. If they want to burn it or donate it, so what?? It was theirs. They did their part when raising you til you were grown enough to be on your own.

[@MichaelYoder1961]

Happy New Year, Charlotte (and Mike)! Looking forward to more content next year!

[@dinasilva9263]

Charlotte we need the Audacity merchandising. 💜 is now my favorite word. 😂 I wish you a happy new year, i really hope the next year brings you a lot of joy, success and love. Thank you for making us feel better and laugh so much through the years. You're the best. 👑

[@patientxero8853]

I second this.

[@lilys7431]

Absolutely

[@ClakyNotReversed]

I third this and I also want to add the "how are you not embarrassed!" merch too! 😂 Ps. is "I third this" the right way to say it in English? You know what I meant by that, right, guys?

[@erikarussell1142]

@@ClakyNotReversedlol yes. And in good ole American fashion, I 4th this. Lol

[@jenn8179]

My sister and I too! We say "Where do they find the audacity?? Audacities R Us??" 😂😂😂

[@c00mgoblin]

Second OP needs to bring this up gently to their sons and not the ex. He needs to explain to them that HE wants to hear about their vacations and wants to hear about their stuff, but maybe to spare the girls from hearing it out of courtesy. It’s not their mom’s responsibility to act poor for her ex. 🥴

[@Bean_dork]

This is my exact thought! Especially the littlest one who is three and has zero concept of money and might start to feel like her parents love her less than her older brothers mom loves him. I remember being around that age and a friend of my grandad was getting married, I really REALLY wanted to be flower girl, now, obviously, they had one. But I can remember thinking that if I asked my mum enough, maybe I'd get lucky and could be one. The fact that there was already one didn't even register with my little brain, or the fact that this was a planned event I wasn't part of, I was too little for any logic to really sink in and couldn't understand. I didn't throw a fit, or yell or cry, I just calmly kept asking my mom and was disappointed it didn't work 😂

[@aphelion4616]

There's a problem there: Dad doesn't want to hear about it either. It's very plain that he resents his ex for being able to move on without him and she has done it in spectacular fashion. Also, notice the ages of their youngest son and the age of his eldest daughter with his new wife. I bet dollars to donuts he was having an affair with his current wife. He's pissed she is better off without him and living her best life and taking care of her sons properly. He has no leg to stand on and he knows it.

[@Shasha-yg1mm]

​@@aphelion4616The eldest daughter could be a step daughter only OP accepts her as his child. I've heard many a step parent call their step children my son or my daughter without using the word step in front of it.

[@lingodelfo5415]

Agree, or, honestly, could also talk to the ex about the kids' behaviour, as it's important to teach them about inequality/what can be perceived as bragging / empathy and such things

[@LB-gz3ke]

I think OP and his ex should talk to the older kids. Teaching them to be sensitive doesn’t require anything but a little empathy. 10 and 12 is old enough to understand the basics of money and income.

[@loveli420]

LAST STORY: Oh you love to see karma in action! The daughter in law gave up over a decade of her life in selfless care of both protecting her best friend, and in taking care of an elderly couple. Now she is set for life and has a lifelong best friendship with John. She is a good person! ❤

[@sunrysesetter8647]

You can't blame people for existing, Check Yourself! 😂😂😂😂😂I absolutely ADORE you!!!! Keep going!!❤❤❤

[@ashleyt6840]

I remember the second story! Idk if this is from another story, but I thought I remembered he demanded for her to take his daughters to the cruise too.

[@katie17330]

8:41 Teaching the older kids to be considerate is a good approach, though I don't think they need to completely avoid talking it around the younger kids. Coming from a big family with lots of older siblings, it's normal for younger siblings to want to do the things older siblings get to do.

[@amytheorangutan]

I agree with this. While definitely not his ex’s problem that she makes more money and spend them on her kids and it’s his children’s right to talk about their privileges however and whenever they want to talk but it is also nice to teach kids to be considerate of others situation. The kids from his second marriage didn’t ask to be born to a poor family and have a rich step sibling that can flaunt their wealth. They are young and have a feeling of jealousy. The dad has a responsibility to teach his 3 kids that we cannot have everything other people have BUT it is also his ex’s responsibility to teach consideration and humility to the 2 kids. It is their right to brag but bragging in front of people who are less fortunate is not a great trait. Even if the dad cheated, lets not allow insensitivity and inconsideration to be handed down to his kids who didn’t do anything wrong. If this is done to strangers who are poor, the rich kids would have been called inconsiderate. You can enjoy your wealth without making people who are less fortunate than you feel awful. They can brag to their other rich kids friends all they want or talk to their dad when they are alone with him. Kids from both sides need life lessons.

[@ClakyNotReversed]

Hi, dear Charlotte! I have been your follower since 2020, since the days of the naked man (old followers like me know what I'm talking about 😂) . And I just wanted you to thank you so much for giving me so many smiles and laughs every day. Your videos in my country (Italy) always come at 6pm, so I watch them after a long day and they are my comfort and my safe space. These days it's been particularly rough for me, especially today... And yet, you are here, at 6pm sharp, to make me feel better and temporarily forget about the things that make me feel bad during the day. Thank you so much, Charlotte! I will always be your loyal follower, I love seeing your channel and your popularity grow and I love your smile and your laugh, they make me smile and laugh too 😊 thank you so much! Sending hugs, Claudia from Italy ❤

[@annahaasler1985]

Naked man!

[@CharlotteDobre]

Thank you so much for the kind words and for being a subscriber for so long! Btw my mom is also called Claudia and she is from Italy too!! Happy new year!

[@ClakyNotReversed]

​@@CharlotteDobreI remember you telling me this about your mother around 2 years ago, it is such a cool coincidence! And you're welcome, this is the minimum I could do to show you my support and love! Keep up the great work, I love seeing you becoming more and more successful, if there is someone who truly deserves it, that is you 😊 have a beautiful end of the year and an even more beautiful first of the year! Thanks again for everything, Charlotte! 😊❤

[@CharlotteDobre]

@@ClakyNotReversedhope you have a ton of success and joy in 2024!❤

[@Kreed4LiFe]

@@Sbarali777 See I can troll comment's too. Your account is only a week old. So, your a bot or a troll.

[@keirafurajie6128]

7:01 Charlote: When I used to work... somewhere else Charlotte's editor: that sounded naughty 🤣 I love the chaos of Charlotte's reaction, and her editor just adds to it. It's brilliant loll

[@christinawegford4245]

My stepson had 3 younger siblings (different dads). No one on either side was well off, but my MIL took him on several really nice vacations. We never heard anything about the other kids in that equation bc it is bonkers.

[@akitafinger1539]

OSO love the relationship ole babé kept w John and the fact she knew and he was comfy enough to tell her that he was fay and they mutually divorced after he gotten his med license was top tier 😊 and split that 12mil w him when she didn't have to that's why grandpa left it all to her cause they knew the honesty in her enough to trust her w their lives until they passed away and their finances in the afterlife she the shyt babé i fuccn love it ❤❤

[@subhajitdeysarkar9724]

Story 2 : if you cannot afford the heating bills for your house, maybe think before having 5 kids. Not your ex's fault that you cannot keep it zipped up. She is earning the money and can spend it on her children how ever she wants. Your daughters from the second marriage are not her responsibility

[@user-blob]

THIS 100%

[@davidvento5481]

As someone who had lost both parents by the age of 21 and was left alone to cope using my own devices in NYC I realized very quickly it was a “sink-or-swim” situation. I finished college and worked my way up to a director-level position in Manhattan’s corporate world. I realize every situation is different but from a family of independent-minded individuals I have little tolerance for people in their mid-to-late 20s (and above) who rely solely on their family to sustain them making no effort to become responsible adults themselves. Everyone needs to figure things out sooner or later and from experience I know that sooner is better.

[@TheBaumcm]

Not in the same boat at all but of the same mind. My older siblings have relied on my parents to bail them out from their bad decisions, which my parents did because there were kids involved (and there were a few force majeure like floods too). I have been independent pretty much as soon as I graduated also held jobs consistently through summers since my early teens. I don’t ask for what I don’t need, because in my family it comes with crazy amounts of strings, was the only one of my siblings (all lived in the same town or close by to my parents while I lived about a thousand miles away) to give up my life for two months while my dad was in treatment, and generally, figure I am left to my own devices since they can’t be counted on for anything.

[@davidvento5481]

@@TheBaumcm Being 💯independent is best. Nothing comes free, everything has strings or is conditional. 👍🏻

[@Mrjudsonjames]

My family/parents are poor but loving, the would provide love and emotional support and encouragement, but we’re never able to give financial assistance. Myself and all my siblings are independent, confident, self reliant and very successful people, because we got what was actually important from our parents. Love and encouragement to learn to stand on our own. I actually think it’s bad parenting to coddle your children financially.

[@davidguidry657]

Second video, I agree OP is the a-hole. The ex-wife bettered herself and her income which she is using for treating y’all’s kids to experiences. If you’re that worried about it, ask her how she did it or find a way to better yourself like she did.

[@dominamortis1111]

I agree he makes 30K and wife stays at home. Wife can get a part time job and he can do online courses and there are many things he can do to find a better paying job, there are ways out of the holes people dig themselves in. It DOES take time and work to fix and you have to be dedicated, but it can be fixed. His sons don't understand concepts like flaunting, so all that was needed there was to explain to them the financial situation and just not bring up stuff like that around the little sisters. And then work on some self improvement.

[@candicemorgan979]

@dominamortis1111 I imagine she stays home more bc childcare for 3 kids (plus 2 more part time) plus driving to/from childcare and work would cost the same, if not more than she would make 🤷🏼‍♀️ A lot of families who earn less realize that. They just need to get better at budgeting their money (and shouldn’t have had kids if they struggle that much, at least not 3 🤷🏼‍♀️). The dude needs to step it up. However, also the wife could pick up freelance work to supplement their family (eg when the older kids are at school and she just has the 3 yo and the 3 yo is down for a nap or something)- there are quite a few companies that look for parttime freelancers doing certain tasks and if you’re good at things like writing, always ppl looking for help editing things, or as some ppl do here, she could provide after school babysitting for other kids that go to her kids school or even in the evening or at night provide tutoring or something similar (or if she’s good at cooking or baking, selling pre-prepared meals to ppl- some housewives do that and make good amounts of money)... there are a lot of possibilities... hubby could also get a job on a cruise ship and probably make more than $30k (but be gone most of the time) plus discounted vacations for his family 🤷🏼‍♀️

[@NotoriousEKB]

Upload schedule: I find I'm always searching for something to watch on Mondays, Tuesdays, and Thursdays. Would love to see your vids pop up on those days! I genuinely look forward to your funny takes on the ridiculous. 😅❤

[@nikkiberns1365]

Second story: dude was totally cheating on his first wife. Two of his kids, one from each woman, barely a year apart? He remarried “a year later” after the divorce? And then only makes $30k 😅 He’s the spiteful one and is getting what he deserves.

[@katherinemcintosh7247]

Story 1. My folks “helped” my younger brother into his late 30’s. They did not “help” my sister and me in this way past our late teens. We learned to live our lives responsibly as young adults and he did not. He is now in his 50’s and this is still causing problems for him (although he had to grow up a lot when dealing with a messy divorce.) Story 2. We cannot know, as strangers, whether or not the ex is trying to flaunt wealth. What I do know, as a parent, is that sometimes we like to find ways to give our children “the best.” To people with less money, this can seem like flaunting. To a negatively minded person, someone making it known, however humbly, that they are taking a “fabulous vacation,” because it is exciting, this will ALWAYS seem like flaunting. This is a good time to start teach the half siblings about life choices and being happy for the fortune of others. We have taught our children not to discuss invitations to things in front of others who are not invited. We have pointed out things which we cannot afford, which our friends can because they have made different life choices. This is not done through a lens of envy, but as a matter of fact. If one has an infinite supply of money, one need not make choices on how to spend it. The rest of us have to make choices daily. We chose to have children. Friends of ours chose not to. They now have a lake house and a boat. We are all happy with the choices we have made, and continue to make for ourselves. That’s life.

[@lightningangel45]

Absolutely based take, dear commenter 💯

[@DarkEinherjar]

Last story: if the parents are willing to cut their son out of their lives because of his sexual orientation, I wouldn't be surprised if they completely neglected their own parents as well. They're horrible human beings. Even the $50k the mom received was way more than they deserved.

[@twylasmith31]

Right! And I bet they also removed him from their will, if they even had one. Or they won't be putting him in their wills when they make them. But then they can't keep that same energy when it happens to them.

[@TG-jp3tc]

The reality is if the parents _don't_ put John in the will, as their son and legal heir he can contest the will and would likely have a court offer him a portion of their inheritance. Unless they specifically place something of value as his inheritance possibly with an explanation for why they were only offering a certain item/amount, it could be argued in court that he was accidentally overlooked or overlooked from spite. Either will get an inheritance overturned and redistributed.

[@twylasmith31]

True. And his parents were in the will, they just got a small amount. I've seen other comments that that's probably why the grandparents did give them a small amount in their will; so they couldn't argue anything in court.

[@xen0bia]

@@twylasmith31 Yup, I also feel like the grandparents probably felt abandoned by their daughter and that's why she received a significantly smaller amount than the caregiver, but sufficient enough that she couldn't dispute the will. And the caregiver, can give whatever she wants to John that they have both agreed own. It's possible the grandparents had homophobic beliefs as well - the apple doesn't usually fall very far from the tree after all - but it's not entirely clear if they did or not, but in any case, John still visited them and they probably liked him very much even if they didn't know about his homosexuality, and he was still given 50k in inheritance. It's more karma for the parents for sure, as they had decided to pretty much disown the son, and he's going to get a lot more than them in the end. Good on the caregiver and John!

[@cierralynseventeen2298]

I think the one comment was right about having to give them something so they couldn't fight it. If that was the case, well played by the grandparents.

[@DarkEinherjar]

1st story: she basically treats OP like an ATM, rather than a husband. OP should've simply gone on vacation by himself.

[@She_real-4-real]

Story 1: it sounds like the son and ex are fully taking advantage of this woman, honestly.

[@darlenecosner2188]

Absolutely! Thank you Charlotte for being so honest.

[@tiffbecks1190]

Charlotte’s editors are 👌🏻 the Office and Better Call Saul memes they keep inserting are amazing 😂

[@gwillypdawg]

I imagine that woman sent a text back saying I am not trying to make you feel less than, you just are.

[@kaylademoura6165]

A good teaching moment for kids that you won’t always get what others have. Sometimes you have less than others and sometimes you have more than others. Do something else fun, my family was poor and when we couldn’t afford things my mom created fake tickets and gave us Pennies set up a table with tons of snacks and we pretended we were going to the movies and we couldn’t get everything as it costs a certain amount of Pennies and it allowed us to do some math and learn to pick what we wanted most. It was quite fun.

[@SoManyRandomRamblings]

And in the long run that quality time and those experiences have been beneficial to you.

[@Ianna80]

@18:22 As a caregiver, they're just🤬 bc they don't get the $$!! 99% of kids just stick their parents in homes & forget about them. They barely visit unless a b-day or anniversary & are annoyed when we call for more of something. It's actually rly sad to watch bc they're basically thrown away.

[@failedattemptdnd]

True. As long as they give something, a lawyer won’t touch any dispute made by the parents or anyone else making claim to the money

[@13gondolla37]

First lady needs a wake up call. Husband should call and say she passed away and left everything to him and see how fast her ex and son throw a hissy fit over money. I've seen it happen twice. They've turned a safety net into a support system.

[@evvieelmore]

to be fair, many suburbs in the US arent public transport friendly. still no excuse, ubered, biked, & walked to work myself too 👋🏼

[@shelliemathews1043]

That's like where I'm at...no public bus and live off a highway...have to be very careful on it. Whether by bike or foot...it's of highway 59 between Marshall and Jefferson Texas, not to mention not many lights on it either.

[@evvieelmore]

@shelliemathews1043 i lived on US40 of a suburb of indianapolis. work was 4 miles from my house. i only biked once or twice cause i had chronic pain, walking was easier for me. still did it, & i offered to pay my coworkers everytime they offered to drive me home. thankful for them, they helped a lot during that time 💓

[@shelliemathews1043]

@evvieelmore I work 5.4 miles away from my camper. It has "little" hills, it would probably make my Fibromyalgia scream and lay me up for days after if I biked...walking would be much easier as well. The rides I get, I also offer to pay. Some take it some don't. I, too, am so appreciative of each of them. Today, 1/13/25, I'm able to get a ride to work but most likely will have to walk home, which is ok. We do what we have to do to survive.

[@TheRoyalSpider]

As a child also caring for their aging parent in their early 20s and expecting a lot of nonsense from my older sister when he passes, that OP deserves every single penny!!! Caring for someone elderly is not easy. Let alone someone you love, and giving up your 20s when you should be trying to figure out life is a selfless act. I'm doing my best to remain strong in these years myself. I'm a mix of pride, love, resentment, and general exhaustion. But I do it because I love my parent and don't see anyone else in the family jumping in to do it either. She deserves everything the grandparents felt right to give her. Even if they had little to give and gave it all to her, she's still right. I hope she invests it well and gets to enjoy life again

[@SoManyRandomRamblings]

Same.....except 20s turned into 30s and now almost halfway through my 40s as well. Wishing you all the best. Caring for disabled and/or elderly loved ones is never easy, may you remain strong and healthy, and get the support you need as well.

[@intuitive_duck]

Story 4: Jackpot! Wow! John’s parents can buzz off. They aren’t entitled to anything if they didn’t show love & support especially in the grandparent’s time of need. I don’t feel great about John receiving a bunch of money when she sacrificed so much. Almost everything for John & his family, she’s a saint. She did the work, she deserves it all IMO. That’s why they gave her so much money.

[@ricardograna4353]

I don't feel great about John getting more money that OP either. At the end of the day, if the grandparents only left 50k to John (same as the mom) it's probably for a reason. May be he wasn't as caring of his grandparents either. And I agree, OP has already sacrificed so much for this John guy. She gave up her 20's, and put her self in a more difficult position to have a career and/or a family of her own, just to be johns coverup, and support him trough med school. She didn't really owned him the majority of the inheritance. It honestly sound like he has been low key taking advantage of her... I might be completely wrong thought, we don't get to know their in and outs of their relationship.

[@steve6631]

In Florida, if you lose your job or have other major change in circumstances, child support is adjusted according to the salary (new salary) of both the parents.

[@Lilbbycm]

I feel so good watching these, always agreeing with you, and always feeling like I’ll never be the AH.

[@ryanbashor7371]

I say it again and again, i love your freaking editor. She is so awesome at her job and so stinking funny 😂

[@Stormageddon81]

In the third story, they did decrease the ex-wife's child support payments. They did at the same time as adjusting the father to be main carer of the children.

[@mzdrea9468]

Op is clearly lying about something. Courts don’t give 50/50 then order child support. It would be pointless as you have the children equally.

[@evaniaendellion6173]

That final story about the will s such a Knives Out moment where everything is left to the carer 😂❤️❤️❤️ NTA keep the money you earned

[@deeh5126]

My ex legit thought I was going to sign away the option of child support when he wanted out of the marriage (4 kids). Lol- as it turned out, our state changed the law around child support and eliminated that as an option, though I never would have agreed to it. Also, full custody doesn't mean you don't have to deal with the ex- unless they relinquish rights- and even then that won't necessarily end child support.

[@dawn1355]

Yes, many states don't allow you to 'opt out' of support. Partly under the premise of give the child the best standard of living that both parents can afford, and so it can't be used as a reason to impact custody/ visitation.

[@solidshade81]

Hooray petty potatoes!

[@stevensawyer5924]

👀🥔😎

[@karolinap1901]

Last story: I'm guessing the parents didn't call/visit grandparents that much and maybe the grandparents had a feeling the parents were the greedy type. Also OP was THE person who looked after grandparents and after the divorce they felt bad for OP in their old worldview ("oh my poor OP, a woman after divorce and her ex is gay how will she recover??") or even a bit scared she'd leave them but she didn't and the grandparents were super thankful and caring. My guess is those are the main reasons why the grandparents left most of the money to OP.

[@stefany2024]

9:41 if he can't afford the basic to his current family, that's not the ex problem. And I can see how she got to be way better without him...

[@SoManyRandomRamblings]

Exactly...he was dead weight

[@Dhestroyer13]

@@SoManyRandomRamblings he was cheating dead weight at that.

[@PacificallyYours]

Hahahaha the Disney one and being jelly ex wife makes more 😂😂. Props to the mom for maintaining singlehood while being primary parent and exploding her online business. Phuckkk yea mama

[@autumnaviva-keshet2410]

Fun (?) fact, Charlotte, in Canada, child support is either paid until the child’s 19th birthday OR 24th birthday. If the child does not attend university, support is paid until 19. If the child is enrolled in post secondary, support must be paid until the child of the marriage is 24 years old. The reason for this is most children return home for summer breaks while in school, and parents often help their children financially while they are in university. Most people assume that support ends when children become legal adults but that is not the case.

[@jayschoenhaaar5369]

At 23, I was a junior in nursing school finishing my pediatric rotation. That was fun. I was also working as a paramedic during that time to support myself. Why is she helping them out? You have no reason to help the ex, and the son needs to get a job and grow up. Not the a-hole. In the third on prepare the boys and if you can record conversation and talk to your lawyer. I would sue for full custody.

[@lisamelroy2855]

Right? At 23, I had a full-time job. The son, and the father, need to get off their lazy butts and get jobs. And KEEP them!!

[@moniqueengleman873]

At. 23 I had my PhD I Clinical Science. My husband was in medical school. We traveled to Europe where I went to school. And I came back pregnant and then life got really exciting. My adult children have all graduated college and have great careers and spouses and beautiful children. Why can't other people work hard to accomplish their goals

[@baileyarnold2020]

Man there's lots of invites going out for all of these pity parties 🎉 Story 1: the ex husband is definitely making up excuses to get more money and I can guarantee you half of the sob stories aren't true. Story 2: The ex husband is honestly just showing signs of straight jealousy of his sons mother having money. I'm sure the Disney thing was true with the other kids wanting to go but, I feel like it's more the dad that is upset bc he's not making that amount of money with his new wife and sounds like he almost sounds entitled and throwing a tantrum just bc he and his new family are struggling

[@achildofgodsanchez9608]

The disney story is annoying. Its a situation where he can teach both sets of kids: the boys can be taught to be humble & show empathy & self control-as to not brag to the point where they hurt their step-siblings feelings. The other kids can be taught not to envy/be jealous of what others get and learn to be happy/content with what they have. The only way i could side with the dad is if the boys from the ex are acting like spoiled brats & bragging obnoxiously and intentionally trying to make their half siblings feel bad. However, from the info given sounds lukewarm dad is just jealous & angry he doesn’t have that kind of lifestyle..

[@carlybowers-smith8088]

My son is 22 is on disability but I very much bet that if he could work he would as he is very smart and responsible and luckily doesn't want anything to do with his Dad for good reasons. But I can see this guy's position. It's not his responsibility. She needs to put a stop to the ex and encourage her son to get a job and help himself. Her ex husband should not even be in the picture at all.

[@blerdofpeace5329]

The grandparents knew EVERYTHING.

[@DaliaGuillespie]

I REALLY love Charlotte's video editions. They are a hoot! 🤣

[@juliebiggerbear7300]

19:15 NTA and Never spend money *before* you have it!