Ep. 161 | 2 Bears, 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

[@RaDicAL808]

When Nadav starts googling anything on the shows. Tom turns into the dad who asks you to hold the flashlight while he fixes a car, just a downhill spiral. Lol

[@neighborbruce]

That's the perfect analogy lol

[@Kynect2Hymn]

It's funny to a point, but damn Tom can be fucking mean and impatient sometimes

[@joshguillen8530]

@@Kynect2Hymn i think he puts on for the show they love native

[@Kynect2Hymn]

@@joshguillen8530 if it's for the show he's pretty convincing lol

[@grantagz3394]

Tom needs to remember when he was a fat poor. I hate when he talks to nadaav like that.

[@drivehard2395]

Bert: "I'm not going to have an ice cream cone... I'm not a child" Also Burt: "I drink so much Kool-aid."

[@nicksimmons3824]

Bert: “I can’t do stuff with girls my daughters age” Also Bart: “BACK TO BAD BHABIE”

[@jayjorgensen2024]

Took the laughter right out of my gut. lol

[@sspacegghost]

Berts a TGK. A TGK is a three-girl-kids kind of guy (yes i know hes got two, bear with me). You all know that guy. Tried for three kids, got three girls - no boys. Hes the alpha in the house of four women - those TGK guys are totally different. always have immaculate haircuts and beards. Are a little preachy and bossy. really hard on the outside but buttercream soft just under the surface wouldnt last 10secs on the street. Add Berts a raging addict from his college years, hes still on that run, dont want to miss out on any fun! Add he trades on his big dick energy. So everyone gets swept along and pays him to go harder ! you can see Rogans over Burts shit. Can you imagine Bert, when his kids leave home, hes a TGK what will Bert be like ... when all the females who adore, leave, and move on. it leaves a big hole for three-girl-kids guys, TGKs. Sometimes they turn into monsters.

[@shannonm7449]

BHAD BHARBIE

[@jakemoser1068]

@@shannonm7449 literally 10 times he made that mistake lol love barf

[@Algorythmfpv]

And his first reaction to her bra is "ew what are you old? are you a mom?" when he previously said he only likes milf and old lady porn LMAOOO

[@odr0psh0tzottv70]

I feel like Tom is the master of patience when it comes to Brent Crystals

[@joshferguson529]

You spelled Nadav wrong 😂

[@odr0psh0tzottv70]

@@joshferguson529 no I was implying his patience for Bart is far greater than for Nadav

[@TrickyBoa]

Lmao when he’s going crazy that tyga has a reg sized 🍆 and toms like ok

[@bradford710]

I thought his name was Bart Kerschel

[@Kwestdaroc4]

Lol Brent… its Bruce.

[@andrewpeters93]

Being able to hear Enny saying "Ohhhh myyyy gooood" over Nadavs laughter when Bart asks Tim who's better Bhad Bhabie or Mac Miller was the best moment of this episode for me.

[@18cboyer]

I love when Bert hears about someone for the first time and assumes no one else has ever heard of them either 😂😂

[@faintsignalx]

lmao he's talking about Tyga saying no one's heard of him and they get more views then him and the song they played literally has over a billion views

[@MrAwEsOmE145770]

Dog he was driving me crazy, as if Travis Scott isn’t one of the biggest rappers😂 and Bert’s favorite band is Wilco, idk if you’ve ever listened to Wilco but they’re horrible.

[@spiritfire3941]

​@@MrAwEsOmE145770 Wilco is a band making art on a completely different higher level than any main stream rapper/artist today. I don't know any music from those 2 rappers; sad thing is I know they got popular from being in the kardashian club.

[@p1sa13]

Burnt Columbus

[@teagueshoup]

@@spiritfire3941 literally dead wrong you out of touch geezer lmao. Both of them were insanely famous before the Kardashians.

[@hjmarcellus]

I’m thankful for such a cultural episode. Bert really uplifts the hip-hop community.

[@MadVillain23]

This comment is rich in Irony. It could be mined for irony

[@hjmarcellus]

@@MadVillain23 Elon Musk’s family actually owned an apartheid irony mine.

[@stunksmahoney4606]

Anyone who thinks this fact is somehow negative belongs in those mines

[@matrixkt8673]

These Two are such horn dogs. They cheat on their wives as Bert would say 💯

[@Bherbz]

That video having 1.3B views and he's acting like it's a million 🤣

[@charlesrichter2594]

Yesterday i went to go see Tom perform at the Hardrock and sat behind Charo and his sisters lol. Made me turn into a telescope.

[@psyifinotic]

you saw the simple jack cut in prime form. well done chomo

[@charlesrichter2594]

@@psyifinotic it was actually even worse than tim explained

[@Rosskles]

@@charlesrichter2594 You never go full Simple Jack.

[@toastedtoast]

When he goes "my mom's dead too" and everyone laughed ...... Fucking hilarious. Lol

[@charlesrichter2594]

@@toastedtoast lmao she did not laugh

[@gavinfrey7344]

It never ceases to amaze me how Bert can absolutely butcher words in a language he has spoken for well over 40 years

[@joewaun894]

50 years now. lmao

[@RedBeard_1911]

I feel like Tom's patience with Nadav is almost non-existent, lol.

[@YizzERR]

No one has time for his J behavior

[@anthun88]

Nadav still has a job so i feel like Tom is one of the most patient men in the world to be honest.

[@greggosling2807]

as it should be

[@leftytwoguns572]

Yeah he was getting visibly mad. It’s really not a hard job if we’re being honest.

[@cindylok9584]

" Going going gone..... I dialed 911 a long time ago " - Public Enemy

[@clevermissfox]

The amount of times that Bart asks "how is she[adriana] doing?" And Tim says " I don't know man" is really a good representation of this show.

[@warspyder7406]

This made me laugh way too hard.

[@trentm.364]

The best part of this episode is hearing Enny at 41:16 saying "Oh my God." multiple times in the background after Bert asked if Bhad Bhabie or Mac Miller was a better rapper haha.

[@cassierussell6281]

So cringe to hear such a dumb question 😶

[@satanmitdengeilenbarthaaren]

Poor Ennie 😅

[@jdog5270]

The fact Bert can do an entire episode and not say an artists name correctly once is honestly a talent at this point. He called lil durk 4 different names in two minutes

[@jacobiwilson3887]

Well thank God none of those "artists" are actually good.

[@ghagzor]

They do numbers way bigger than bert

[@kskull5764]

@@jacobiwilson3887 the same way bert isn't actually funny

[@TheDohped]

no its the cold way that off cam you can hear tom giggle then when they cut to him he's just deciding what order to dispose of the bodies

[@Aaronlovesmusic970]

It's cuz those artists aren't very rememberable lol All that 15 minutes of fame rappers these days

[@Benw3790]

The best part was Tom joking about Bert only making $4,300 at the end of the year. Lmao

[@wobbletime8397]

Lmao Bart really had nadav googling dwarf covid and Tom still finds a way to get frustrated with him😂

[@jordanm5149]

Bert summoning Ralphie May to impersonate Leanne 😂

[@thestraydog]

Damn... Miss the big man, he's in that big all-you-can-eat buffet in the sky 😢

[@luishuicochea1513]

Just finished his memoir

[@yew2oob954]

May he rest in pizza.

[@christiananderson6761]

Doctors said his last fat cell was finally announced dead yesterday

[@DursunX]

yes yes. spot on 😆

[@chasearnold7367]

Hearing Enny saying “oh my god” in the booth when Bret asks who’s better between Mac and her is the best

[@teagueshoup]

I really wish someone would correct him when he says dumb fucking shit like that

[@kailenethecat7054]

Came to the comment section for this one

[@jacobiwilson3887]

I don't really care for Enny, but I'd save him over Nadav.

[@codymendoza9343]

I can’t even believe he compared them I have to believe he’s joking.. please tell me he’s joking

[@MichaelC1998x]

I got cancer when bert said that .....

[@Daleetid]

Going from Tarantino to Bert is like watching Reservoir Dogs then turning on SpongeBob

[@jarnold1789]

That’s why Tom is grumpy

[@tjjeune7820]

Someone please rewatch this and take a shot every time Bert accidentally says “Bhad Barbie” 😂

[@higglybiggly1174]

Do you want someone to die? He said her name right 0 times unless corrected lmfao

[@TransformXRED]

I love when Tom gets mad at Nadav for his search "skills" lol

[@WKRP187]

And Nadav takes it off the screen so Tom doesn't get even more irritated just by seeing him trying to find what he told him to search for .. 💀🪦💀

[@Bubbles99718]

He shows real anger a little to often. Cristina folds to it. Not a fan of that, as a real thing or as a tactic.

[@LebaneseJesus]

@@Bubbles99718 touch my camera through the fence chomo

[@TransformXRED]

@@Bubbles99718 ? That's exactly why this is good because it's genuine. Real human emotions. It IS making the whole podcast more interesting when people are themselves. It's totally fine. People are not perfect dolls. You are assuming "real anger" about people you don't know, from 5 secs videos here and there extracted from weeks of their daily lives, without any context 🤷. On top of the fact that these podcasts are recorded for hours and hours. All these different personalities is what makes it entertaining.

[@Eddie_Munster]

@@TransformXRED disagree

[@WelcomeToTheBackLogs]

I like how 20 mins after praising Mac Miller Bert says he would be the first rapper to rap about Kool-Aid.

[@tbdsere]

🎯

[@paytenrice7312]

I was searching for this comment

[@just1frosty516]

A man of culture I see

[@WelcomeToTheBackLogs]

@@just1frosty516 Just an (almost) old guy who reached the "age where you stopped listening to new shit." a few years ago.

[@jasongillum5763]

did mac miller rap about kool-aid???

[@LoudmouthBlonde]

The extremely loud background laugh everytime Bert says something ridiculous is amazing 🤣

[@ghostmarriages]

This is like watching someone's Dad hanging out in a dorm.

[@presleyflowers1840]

The tyga story from both ends is hilarious. Bert: “who is tyga” Tom: “oh he was my neighbor” 😂 31:43

[@evfields24]

Bert’s impression of Leeann sounds more and more like Shannon Sharpe every time 😂😂😂

[@jacobiwilson3887]

I thought he was impersonating that tennis player Venus

[@dwest501]

I can't stop laughing when Tom genuinely goes full dad mode on Nadav googling things 🤣

[@thisisjixxi]

after watching this podcast for over a year the wild shit bert says still blows me away, makes the show amazing tbh

[@matthewsears4044]

The dude in the back that laughs harder than everyone deserves a raise

[@druetz1188]

the google master

[@Kas3-]

Blueban!

[@Takdashark]

Literally came here to make a similar comment!

[@lulukalilanji8416]

Bert & Tom mistaking a Billion for a Million cracked me up😂

[@TheOutdoorDude]

Tom: You know she has neck damage from pile drivers? Bert: 😯 Is this a bit? 💀💀💀

[@EpochEthereal]

This is so damn funny 😂😂 Bert learning about Tyga and Travis Scott

[@Menkii]

Bert really said they get more views than Tyga, the video they showed literally had 1.3 billion views

[@dr_-df7is]

Brent needs his glasses Tyga had over a billion views on that video

[@danielocean3699]

Which one I must’ve missed that part sorry

[@mheardc19]

@@danielocean3699 taste by Tyga has a billion views and beet was saying they get more views

[@lyds710]

Bert’s impression of Leann is THE GREATEST.

[@Xaer_]

She turned into a black male quick.

[@TheOutdoorDude]

When Bert asked "Who's better, bad baby or Mac Miller?" You can hear Enny off mic over Nadavs cackling saying "NOPE" 🤣😂🤣

[@jacobiwilson3887]

HATE NADAV! Isn't Mac Miller dead?

[@nickmeyer238]

@@jacobiwilson3887 yeah he OD'd

[@jacobiwilson3887]

@@nickmeyer238 super sad, I have/had friends who partied with him back in the day

[@Algorythmfpv]

Adriana's injury was worse than anyone thought at first, it was released a while later that she was newly pregnant and had to have it terminated to operate on her back. She's going through PT and doing better, but along with forcing her to give up a child and life changing injury to her back that she may never recover from she's definitely doing the best someone in that position can. She's back to streaming on twitch.

[@dolan979]

I hope she sues the SHIT out of Twitch. 1 foot of foam pads on top of concrete is ridiculously dangerous. She's not even the only person to get hurt

[@Bubbles99718]

Yikes. That's horrible

[@Grayswandiir]

@@funnieman007 you realize that the announcers were actively encouraging people to jump in and have fun, right? There was gross negligence involved on twitch's part, that's not an argument.

[@millardfilmore1403]

@@funnieman007 lmaooo we found the Twitch representative!! Cuck behavior

[@workstudy8118]

Holy fuck

[@kristiepuffinpenguin4522]

Friday night drinking game: watch this and take a shot/drink/rip every time Bert says Bad Barbie 😂😂😂😂😂

[@kimr2352]

This has turned into my favorite segment ever. Showing Bert rappers he doesn’t know 😂 So good. Please do this more. love you Bert.

[@shanezeller9833]

Bert learning about Travis Scott was a great segment 😂

[@xSmokey95]

Monday mornings blow but getting the notification for this pod always helps making it better, especially paired with some coffee

[@772lance]

Sitting at work dying in the first two mins cuz his leanne impression was so fire

[@TeaGF]

" nu-uh not in my cooter " 😂

[@FloridaWeed]

@@TeaGF i knew a dude named cooter growing up. I bet you can guess where i grew up aswell 💀

[@daegiovanni5864]

"you got the wrong gal!!"

[@772lance]

@@daegiovanni5864 the “you out of yo mind shieeeettt” took me out 😂

[@thestraydog]

@@FloridaWeed I'm putting money down on Florida

[@brianjirka7340]

Bart is somehow getting dumber every day and it makes him so much funnier

[@mrdilgames6546]

So amazingly deep into denial with almost everything going on in his life. I love it.

[@Aussiematee]

It’s amazing to see toms fitness journey while watching Bert’s continuing descent into alcoholism

[@NeonPanda64]

Barney is so detached from reality in this episode lmao

[@Ethera918]

i like when Nadav and Ennie both use their mic buttons just to shake their heads silently

[@thesheriff18]

Bert thinking the Tyga video has 1.3 million views instead of 1.3 Billion views is amazing

[@tylermelnyk]

😂😂😂 I had to do a double take when I was listening cuz I thought there was no chance Taste only had 1 million views

[@millardfilmore1403]

Killed me that no one corrected him either lol. Like I’m not a tyga fan really but you can’t say he was an unsuccessful rapper by ANY means. Not to mention he’s a product of young money!

[@ryancarter23]

His top 5 most viewed songs have over 500m 😂

[@thacoolbean]

“Who’s Tyguhh”- Bert😦

[@iainh]

56:55 - "Did I tell you my theory about little people not getting covid?" Tom's reaction is priceless, like a dog being told they are going for a walk, he just can't wait to hear what is going to come spewed from Bert's mouth.

[@zacclark9554]

Tom just giving the “researcher guy” the death stare is AMAZING

[@busfahrer09]

hey newbie jeans welcome, hang in here high and tight.

[@HeWhoGoons]

Dude Tom getting mad at nadov googling shit is the most aggressive shit ever😂😂💀

[@jbleibtrey]

"somebody saying wanna get a drink?" Best line this episode. 55:00

[@norb4152]

Bert: "Now I'm at a length (hair) that I'm comfortable with." Seemingly does not dare to take off his hat

[@Joe-oj4rh]

Tim is such a great guy for carrying Bertha's career at this point

[@18Callahan]

Facts 😂

[@codymendoza9343]

BIG FACTS

[@llabronco]

Dear god they really aged themselves in this episode.

[@StudioMod]

Why because they don't like Onlyfans and have a modicum of intelligence?

[@brynt8830]

It's so sad

[@StudioMod]

@@brynt8830 No it's not. What's sad is the new generation not realizing they're too cringe too even give the time of day.

[@xanderkbruh582]

@@StudioMod bro he said “Bad Barbie” like 60 times and you’re calling the new generation cringe?

[@blakan1478]

Did you think they were spring chickens before this episode? lol Don´t expect anyone over the age of 15 to keep up to date with only fans models (hoes)

[@Noname30000]

“Google the breakdown of her earnings…..than get back to us next Thursday” That joke shouldn’t of gone unnoticed lmao

[@molonym2]

Listening to Bert talk about rap is hysterical

[@jordanlyngle6235]

Toms energy is so grumpy this episode 😂😂😂😂

[@prundonmcavoy7155]

The constant yawning 😄

[@vergaerd]

I bet Burnt Chrysler is tiresome af to hang out with. Yet, its probably worth it somehow. Sometimes I wonder how long will take until Tim breaks.

[@jordanlyngle6235]

@@vergaerd today was one of those days that I feel like I understand their relationship. Barth was keeping things light and keeping Tom moving after he got frustrated.

[@Ben-fn8wm]

Brent is hard to deal with, period. Makes horrible assumptions and is very ignorant.

[@johanvanderpants9363]

They were in full bank mode on this one. Probably the third one of the day. Adriana broke her back like a month ago. They've taken about their recording schedule.

[@anthonyyyy2858]

Bert hates being called Bart or Brett but literally mispronounces everyone's name

[@jacobiwilson3887]

He only mispronounces unimportant people

[@SoftNom]

@@jacobiwilson3887 ben affleck

[@jarnold1789]

@@SoftNom Bena Fleck

[@mitchmulvehill1424]

Tom and Christina definently make fun of Bart before they go to sleep

[@holdonasecondamigo599]

That blackccent segment was real reminiscent of those old school "Tom or Black" segments on YMH. Beautiful stuff 🤌

[@markstevenson6011]

I felt like I was listening to a broken record . STAY ON POINT BERT

[@g58167]

Bert: I can’t do anything young anymore because my kids are that age Also Bert: Can you log into the Catch Me Outside girl’s Onlyfans?! Let’s see what she’s got!

[@andrewburns1912]

I have a daughter at 17 and to think he's perving on girls just a few years older is creepy af he's secretly a pervert 100

[@impossiblegems]

That is true narcissism because in his head he thinks THEY are the same age not his daughters and her - the ego is an amazing thing

[@GamingForNow]

They literally ignore the fact that she’s a public train wreck it’s crazy one of the crew didn’t say anything about how she basically had a mental breakdown on tv and has been exploited since

[@yaboykam962]

@@GamingForNow bruh it’s a podcast hosted by comics it’s funny not serious relax

[@yaboykam962]

@@impossiblegems yo they are comics they make jokes and do bits it’s funny not serious

[@KushDid7-11]

Bert: omg she broke her back in two places?? Also brent: can we get her on the phone? Hey guys can we get her on the phone?

[@arthurrfagundes16]

That was retarded. Also he thought she was poor lol

[@Indomakio]

That moment with Bert talking about small penis and the abrupt cut to ads was great, but the fact that one of the first sentences in the ad was "minimalistic approach" had me dying

[@Et91640]

“We’ve done research on only fans” really got to me

[@amandabolling7058]

Bert: "What if we did a co one where we just did gay shit together " Tom: "what?" 👀🤨 Bert: "nothing"

[@jacobiwilson3887]

I'd forever hate them for ruining life lol

[@thursty3858]

😂😂😂😂

[@leeward6762]

😆 How many times did Tom correct Bert saying "Bad Barbie" ?

[@clevermissfox]

And get asked if Adriana is okay

[@yungchilibowl9494]

Brunt’s impression of his wife just gets better every time, it sounds just like her it’s amazing idk how he does it.

[@jpierce2l33t]

Your laugh never gets old, Nadav. Don't *ever* stop doing it. I find myself cracking up even more so when I hear you laughing too 🤣

[@Mix-oq3ex]

I can watch a Podcast of just Bert listening to new music 100% lmao.

[@chandler9870]

Tim and Bert need to find a “new rapper” and judge them every week lol that was gold

[@kennethbandera3195]

I love that Travis Scott was an immediate yes for Bert, with them being scared about copyright it was dope to hear the songs on this pod 😂

[@th4d4rkd3v1l83]

56:57 best part of podcast. Nadav’s laugh makes me laugh so hard.

[@evanwhite5627]

31:44 that video they watched literally had 1.3b views 😂😂😂 i love bert

[@martinglaviano2232]

i would love a shirt that says stfu bert let tom talk! love both the bears uuuuuuuuuuuhh 100 percent

[@lamberson47]

I love googling things at the same time as nadav and finding things immediately

[@JungleVods]

A music review section is an amazing segment

[@hobojimmy3500]

56:56 I have NEVER seen a harder turn in a podcast before in my life!

[@tengocharlie2024]

Coincidentally Mac Miller raps about Kool-Aid in one of his earliest hits

[@flying_nimbus7852]

Bert: "I dont wanna look like a creeper" Also Bert: "I look at their OnlyFans all the time"

[@brianspearman6213]

I love when Bert makes Tom laugh like Ray Charles

[@GameReaper740]

Tom I just saw you live in Monterey and I laughed the entire time!! Thank you for such a fun night, what an end to im sure an amazing US tour! Congrats and thank you for the memories!! 💕

[@9176michael]

when Brent went for the bugger I yelled "but Tarantino sat there!!"

[@i3elieve]

26:52 he first said it normal but then realized he's speaking to Bert and added 'ER'😂

[@Woozychu]

Bert: I can’t watch teen porn anymore Also Bert: Show me Bhadbabie & Sami Sheens Onlyfans 👀

[@barrybadrinath42069]

Starting off Monday with a pot of hot koolaid and 2Bears1Cave.

[@SparkonRust]

i'll be surprised if anyone understands this

[@AirWindFire]

@@SparkonRust Burnt starting his day with a 64 ounce koolaid and Toms response appears on nearly every “best of” compilation of these guys, so even those that didn’t see that episode will get the ref.

[@christiandietrich8171]

@@AirWindFire I think they're referencing a video by Julian Smith from like 15 years ago. "I MADE THIS FOR YOU!"

[@AirWindFire]

@@christiandietrich8171 I stand fully corrected! I couldn’t watch the whole thing, but now get the reference and why someone would think that’s obscure! Thanks for keeping it high and tight!

[@ryfalraptor10]

I love 2 bears, just two hours of Bert saying the most outrageous shit and Tom bullying him for it

[@devinsilva2102]

At 42:15 woah Vicky sounds like an illiterate bobby booshae from the movie water boy with Adam Sandler 😂

[@swiftystix9418]

If Bert heard Pete & Bas he would lose his mind 😂

[@IlIlIlIlIlIlIlIlIlIlIlIlI]

Berts black impersonation of his wife had me dying laughing 🤣

[@jacobiwilson3887]

I was so confused I was like, "When did Leanne get hood?"

[@neighborbruce]

Bert on Travis Scott: "I know there's a bunch of people in the Astrodome he got in trouble with".

[@christinaanamaria]

“Let me see some of her pile drive videos.” Tom: “Uh okay.” *Tom smile sweetly* Look at how much his face lit up. 😂

[@jmreck]

I loved that part too! His smile said “wait until he sees this shit!” 😂

[@sentientcardboarddumpster7900]

I don't even know what that means, I'm gonna check it out later haha

[@shaunrizzolo6175]

“I’m into hip hop” oh yes Bert you seem very plugged in

[@darincarter7098]

I love hearing everyone in the sound booth dying laughing. Yall are so damn funny.

[@BigGuyBiggerTruck]

i never laugh harder than seeing Tom's reaction to things like "did i tell you about my theroy about little people not getting covid?"

[@foureyez22]

Imagine woah Vicky trying to talk to Wanda Sykes

[@alexshort121]

Why is Tom so impatient with the guys in the booth? 😂 57:48

[@voolproov]

It's tradition

[@jimjohnson8999]

he's a whiner

[@jjakfamily]

Tom's patience was tested 😂

[@markmccormack-reamer7591]

Lmao I love how Tom is just like “Bert come on, only fans is way different than patreon” and Bert’s like I’m just helping support business 😆

[@davidgarza3860]

"CHANGED MAN , LOOK AT THE RANGE MAN!" ...LMFAO!!❤

[@just1frosty516]

I’ve never been more uncomfortable then Bert saying bhad bhabie

[@matplot6170]

How is argot/language of bhad bhabie called?

[@charlesgaron8131]

@@matplot6170 what the english is that

[@countrycity]

He kept caller her Bad Barbie instead. 💀