New Subscriber Admission Exam ASMR

[@millenniumtraveller8626]

Rift: “it seems you’re in a bit of a…” Me: “Pickle, Pickle, Pickle, Pickle.” Rift:”predicament” Me: “DAMMIT”

[@LuckyArceus]

He’s pickle riiiift! Wubalubadubdub!

[@sidey3412]

lol same

[@1ogo]

@@LuckyArceus lets hope he doesnt get charged with domestic abuse

[@YouShallNotPassHaha]

@@1ogowhat!

[@nysreme7]

@@YouShallNotPassHahajustin roiland

[@solidskullz5736]

Welcome new subscribers. I hope you’re ready for some of the most mind blogging yet relaxing videos of all time

[@DanielBielecki2013]

I hope this comment get alot likes!

[@ayeCABRONE]

​@@DanielBielecki2013commenting here so it does 😁

[@stormhunter2627]

*mind boggling absolutely agree! never try to make sense of a nonsensical multiverse, and all that, but the way Uncle E has gotten me to sleep for the past ~8 years is impressive

[@SarumanOrthanc]

Well, Seymour, I made it despite your directions.

[@persephone9084]

The mixture of lore and relaxation is just perfect

[@lastmanstanding80]

Being confused and relaxed simultaneously is an odd feeling the mind and body cannot explain.

[@espy9244]

Too calm to comprehend the horrors, come back another time Cthulu

[@someone_246]

rift and marno are the only asmrtisrs that can pull it off

[@Karizmatyc]

You must be new here

[@gweniequinn]

We literally held this guy at gunpoint a few weeks ago and he’s still giving us top tier asmr. He’s so cool.

[@Tarking434]

😂

[@Lucas-cz5to]

Why were we soo mad at him? We even held a green gun, the most dangerous weapon

[@Sasqe]

few weeks != multiple months

[@noahjones9366]

​@@Sasqethe concept of time in the ER universe is incomprehensible. During his multiple choice questionnaire, he asked us about videos that don't exist yet 🤔

[@galaksina]

Putting this into the pile of "Things that should be alarm, but makes sense for Uncle E's comment section"

[@rplenkers9240]

Yknow uncle rift I had a sudden realization recently. I have been falling asleep to your videos since i was 14 and im 21 now. Youve been here helping me sleep during the worst and best parts of my life. You have, to put it simply, been the one person I could always count on. So thank you, thank you for sharing your amazing ideas and and art for the all of us to enjoy. Youre amazing!

[@MaxieWolfe]

Amen

[@camvalence]

crazy, me as well. he truly has been a blessing to us growing up

[@jay_animates571]

Tnhj 32:31 to uuht 32:36 my o😊yit tot m uyht hyty my yy h 😮 uh hmy huh my😅 hey 33:19 u😅 33:22 in h u uh y hi hl😢 33:55 hhuit😅😅u 34:15 y h h by

[@jayy8364]

Same here! From 21 to now 28. Been a great ASMR ride

[@JesusChrist-pd9py]

This guy could make a video of him just saying "button" for an hour and I'd listen to it every night

[@gudkush420]

You cant tell me that E didnt immediately write that idea on a sticky note after liking this comment.

[@JesusChrist-pd9py]

I really hope he did, it would really make my second coming a lot more rewarding

[@punyr]

Don't give him any ideas😭

[@accountaccount7762]

Real

[@N51totallynotprivatemilitary]

@@punyr why not

[@ChillaxWithZac]

Kind of unbelievable how every single one of us got the same magic button. You’d think at least one of us would’ve hit it off with Cynthia, Clyde, or Margaret.

[@MightyGachiman]

I am willing to share, but i need it back by next wednesday!

[@ChillaxWithZac]

@@MightyGachiman Deal!!

[@etherealhawk]

Mum says it's my turn with the button

[@galaksina]

Whenever or not you pass this exam, we hope you enjoy the process dear would-be subscriber. Remember to leave a bodypart in the tip jar on the way out. We thank you for kindly

[@sickna-sty3244]

I have left my right sclera. The one that has the Declaration of Independence tattooed on it!

[@gfdx3214]

Im leaving my right carunkle

[@thevexingwitch330]

I was going to donate my heart but Dr Corvus already took that 🤣 i guess i could just donate my body to SCP 049 and hope he can just leave my skull as a tip 😂

[@Plum_scum]

​@@sickna-sty3244love the reference😭

[@dreamiblu]

Odd. It appears the little gremlin that sits atop the door holding the tip jar decided not to come in to work today.

[@Perryishappy1527]

Your hair is so mystical dude, you look like a wise wizard

[@ralphisxamida8533]

ER the white ❤️

[@06sub27]

Er the white?

[@ralphisxamida8533]

@@06sub27 Lord of the rings reference, from the wizards the white one is the most powerful.

[@repws7076]

@@ralphisxamida8533and brown is the weakest 💀

[@xoomster9595]

If you are new around here don't get too attached. .

[@arattux]

I love these intros where he's gonna say "good now", but stops and switches side. I don't know why but it's just so tingly xd

[@gee_dubya]

Edging our tingles

[@arattux]

@@gee_dubya exactly!😂

[@squirraffe3252]

it’s not even tingly for me it just gives me anxiety until he says it

[@arattux]

@@squirraffe3252 haha ye😂

[@el_walser]

@@squirraffe3252 Yeah, unfortunately, me as well, I can't watch these videos when I'm trying to sleep, whenever he does that the tension is just killing my relaxation. Still great videos, though.

[@victorsalazar1273]

It’s always a good day when ER uploads

[@DanielBielecki2013]

I hope this comment get alot likes

[@ethanhampton2265]

I gotta agree

[@ethanhampton2265]

As a subscriber I’ll get 110% on the exam, Just You See!

[@DanielBielecki2013]

I hope this comment get alot likes

[@harveyashley1895]

​@@DanielBielecki2013I hope this comment on this comment gets alot of likes

[@miklashovej7836]

I hope 🎉

[@juuzou4074]

⁠@@harveyashley1895I hope this comment on the comment of the comment that’s being commented on gets alot of likes…wait what🤔

[@weirdshitfinderman4181]

Too bad the pass mark will be 727% knowing how ER does his questionnaires lol

[@CrowAtNight]

I missed this exam when I first subscribed, so I'm glad I'm getting around to it now

[@RobinBraccini]

Got so many tingles with the anticipation for “good now”

[@startaster806]

my sense of time is warped but i remember the hair video like it was yesterday,,, i can’t believe how quickly it all grew back!!

[@Motherlesstripod]

I think with longform asmr dropping down in popularity, this channel has still kept onto its original charm that it had in 2017. ER is truly here for the community not the money or views. You are a genuine artist man, keep up the good work. Ps: the alternate universe videos were some of my favorite modern videos youve ever made, super creative and really well done.

[@nickwillard4471]

Idk how you grow hair so fast. You've grown more hair in the last few months than I have in my entire life

[@slavic_bumpkin624]

0:10 me after walking up the stairs too fast

[@FrankSinatraTheSecond]

What

[@irishcrackhead69]

Bruh you too smart😂😂

[@slavic_bumpkin624]

@@FrankSinatraTheSecondI’m breathing really hard cause I walked up the stairs too fast

[@uCruz_]

Stop flexing that you can breath, some us can't and this is really mean. 0:01

[@brandonbryant7854]

Lmao lets make this top comment 😂

[@Reveliojelly]

This comment made me not breathe laughing

[@ReliefASMR]

As a 10 year veteran, I should hopefully pass. Wish me luck. As long as I don't fall asleep during the exam!

[@corymackenzie-gray1359]

@ciaranjamiesonfamily-frien5144 the alternate universe

[@yosher]

@ciaranjamiesonfamily-frien5144Innsmouth

[@frogmaster3010]

@ciaranjamiesonfamily-frien5144 he means that he’s been watching for ten years

[@ultspark]

The Ephemeral Rift Army

[@Rosweld76]

@@ultspark The good old ERA!

[@Redmartian2000]

Hey Paul, I wanna say thank you for making these top tier ASMR (and even just videos in general) for such a long time now. Having watched your art and creativity since I was 15 back in 2015 until now in 2023 with over a million followers. It truly makes me feel special to have found someone that has been a therapist and great teacher and friend and see their well earned success through the years. I look forward to seeing you every video and you really hold a special, special place within me. Thank you for being such revolutionary in ASMR and KZbin creators. Always and forever a listener of yours :))

[@inferno_0730]

0:32 Relief after the edging intro

[@Ejercitodesalvacioncristiana]

I'm not an english native speaker so I barely can understand what he's saying but is so relaxing...thanks for sharing

[@Jaksonranger]

I can only imagine how baffled that those who subscribed since the last video feel seeing this get uploaded

[@DanielBielecki2013]

I hope this comment gets alot likes

[@NoOne-be7xw]

You know it's gonna be a good asmr video when you get tingles within the first 2 minutes

[@ssnake3461]

Will be awaiting my results in the mail. I’ll make sure to take two weeks off so I won’t miss it.

[@Smellyninja11]

Rift, I have been watching you for years. Thank you for always bringing interesting topics, ideas and calm comfort to my mind. You are my best night time friend and I am inspired by your mindset and creativity. I will be here for the long run and I wish you and your family well!

[@harrisdizdarevic5797]

Don't ever stop making content man. You are the best at this 👍🏻

[@iRoseus]

It’s been awhile! Happy to see you’re around still and happy to see you didn’t let everything stop you. You’ve helped me with so so much since I was a teenager (I’m 26 now) I’m thankful for you. Happy holidays!

[@softia42]

I read the title of the video and it made me genuinely laugh 😂 Maybe because I thought you are one of those who can take an ordinary subject and turn it to interesting video It is currently very early morning but I wish it was early evening to watch your video and have a restful sleep 💤💤💤

[@merkvry_3055]

Hey man, not sure if you will read this but i just want to say, Thank You. I'm on a Bad Period of my Life and you and your channel really help me when i just need to rest and relax, you are a good person.

[@TheConsuI]

Another creative upload from Ephemeral Rift, always great to listen to.

[@fireflyfi]

47:40 A thought that popped into my mind for a moment; wouldn't it be interesting if there was another Sanitarium, other than Arkham? Obviously I don't mean any alternate-universe versions, like branches of Arkham that exist in liquid universes and such; I mean, what if there's another sanitarium that is rivals with Arkham, or maybe they're like a knockoff that wants to be as good as the original? Could be an interesting concept to explore

[@EphemeralRift]

I like the way you think…

[@theonewhoslumbers]

As a years long veteran I shall examin this exam for proper examination qualities in this mulitverse. Other multiverses are out of my jurisdiction

[@the_protectorof_smols3563]

Who examines the examiners *Indeed*

[@Z0mb13ta11ahase]

To any new subscribers... This man has years of lore to indulge in! My recommendations are the candy man Corvus clemmons Tin foil hat society The repairman Oh how I envy you new subscibers, to experience it all...anew!

[@COSmicFingers]

What about:getting Buried in Margaret's garten ?

[@JuliaMaguire-x3b]

Every time I watch I think of how good you and my dad would hit it off lmao appreciate the work, love the channel

[@DavidFlynn-gx2pd]

I have a feeling I'm part of this video and it's for me because I literally am a new subscriber due to transferring to a new phone and loosing my old KZbin account. And had to use this one. Now that I have been following uncle E for 14 years and I finally had the chance to subscribe again. Is always a nice feeling. I love my button gift!!

[@multicosmos333]

Thanks brotha. As always, Much Love, and keep on being You. Infinitely grateful.

[@aaronbrogan1869]

As soon as I clicked the video, I went ahead and liked it. I know I won’t be awake to see the end, but that’s why most of us are here! Thank you Uncle E, you and Dr. Dimitri have helped me for 8+ years!

[@WhimsicalLittledawg]

I literally just finished losing the game of sleep video This one's for NEW PEOPLE.

[@greasey8695]

ER's voice softness varies a lot from video to video, I'm glad to come back to something like this that's very intense and crisp.

[@haydee19]

Been seeing this channel from time to time on home page and watched the Dr. Strange video way back, just started to watch more videos this week, the most recent I've seen and become my favorite by far is the Native American style flute video. Just realized with this video when it was recommended in my home page and I clicked on it that I was not subscribed yet I quickly amended that lol

[@losingmymind611]

I follow like 25 asmrtists and they upload frequently but man I will always put ER first and foremost.

[@alperbatuhan8872]

The new 'good now' intro is so good that i got tingles from the build up 😂

[@joeycubed5888]

I've watched this 4 different times, and have yet to make it to the actual questions awake. Great job!

[@ComradeDucky7]

As a past subscriber i am ready to be admissed as a new one.

[@ramsiethegremlin4310]

I loved the button section 😍 the sounds were so nice along with button being said! Amazing!

[@ASMRCollectNPlay]

Thank god I’m already subscribed, I’m terrible at taking exams 😩

[@LuckyArceus]

Well the descriptions says it’s for judging if you can subscribe AND for if you can REMAIN subscribed.

[@spitgorge2021]

Woah! Haven't even gotten the notification for this one. Now that's early.

[@User47533]

Thank you for helping me sleep! I always love your videos so much!

[@Pieza_De_Queso]

How could we not love this insane man?! It's impossible. This level of insanity REQUIRES love - it's mandatory.

[@chrisruss_]

this guy gives me serious vibes of my 6th grade science teacher (really cool teacher, perfect mix of having a brain and being a teacher, it seems like he genuinely enjoys being a teacher)

[@Kamomilla]

Finally an asmrartist who is willing to remove my brain from my skull for the sake of my relaxation

[@operatorfedge4306]

Good thing I’m already a subscriber, I’ve got too many exams as it is already

[@XanSplainYT]

I already had tingles in the beginning

[@gavinanimates6739]

As an old subscriber, we too have had this admission in many galaxies and dimensions.

[@monellin8274]

Is this a bad time to admit that i didn't study? :D Lovely as always! ♥

[@randomthings-qo4my]

I hope you have someone to give you cheats

[@MaliciousCat]

Another great video by Uncle Rift!

[@tonyamedsker213]

Me taking an “empty” capsule… full of hopes & dreams from a man I hardly know… says A LOT about his abilities!! I’m like OKAY… let’s do this!! ❤️

[@semisemicoloncolon]

YES THANK YOU I’ve been getting tired of watching the same check up and measurement videos recently this is JUST WHAT I NEEDED

[@fros-t1435]

I love that your only merch is krill your shelf and master obliger t-shirts

[@The97lilshow]

Love the anticipatory triggers at the start 😌

[@hannahhester8376]

Omg!! 1 million! When did that happen? That's awesome!

[@misterp0451]

I check in to the channel every few months or so and it’s like slowly watching a regular guy turn into gandalf

[@emperorjeff6382]

Common ER W💯‼️

[@DanielBielecki2013]

I hope this comment get alot likes

[@underconfident_asmr]

To the left of the Rift you entered to watch this video, know you are always welcome to partake from the bowl of spacebars or the bowl of fresh-cut lawn. Have as much as your appetite demands, He's a gracious host.

[@collector6457]

Excellent content as always ephemeral rift 👌

[@esmereldalillian5107]

I have to wait 7 hours to watch this because ER is so good if I watch this at work I'm gonna fall asleep 😢 I'm counting down the minutes!

[@Nova_furry]

hey Rift. I just wanna promise you something, because you truly helped me a lot, and im not gonna let you down. i will never do it again. never.

[@weirdmanheim]

no comments yet wow!!! i love ur videos uncle E 🤞🏽🤞🏽 subscribed since 4th grade!!! creativity never stops

[@stickman20233]

Wow i forgot i wasint subscribes to your channel. Ngl tho your voice is just as calming a jigglypuffs song AND the virtual haircut video COMBINED!

[@torywalker4768]

Role playing as a new subscriber here 👋🥰

[@water..8320]

Good thing these fake glasses let me pass as a new subscriber so i could get the welcome gift a second time haha!

[@R25-c6n]

Bruh I use to watch this dude as a kid like 9 years ago this is crazy I’m 21 now 😂 glad I found him again

[@Dark0thicc]

I have such a hard time sleeping but I swear anytime I listen to one of ur videos I'm out In minutes thanks man for all the tingles

[@mickeywilcox4336]

This is the third night I’ve listened to this while I sleep because I’m curious what the video will be, but I keep falling asleep and I miss everything!

[@VaporBlitz]

I'm a longtime subscriber but I'm still gonna take the exam! Also welcome new subscribers. I wish you all the best and I hope you enjoy your stay wherever you are!

[@Goldstar990]

ER: "speaking of card games, would you like to see a magic trick? Me: "YEEESSSS" ER "so would I" I'm dying don't do this to me

[@masonbruner1239]

The universe will experience heat death before this man runs out of ideas

[@yvngbek]

LAST 2 VIDS HAVE BEEN TOTAL BANGERS. KEEP COOKING U HAVEN'T MISSED YET 💤💤💤💤💤🔥

[@idkwhattoputhere4415]

3 more days and I've subbed to this channel for 1 year

[@TheSixthDoctor]

Uncle E's hair has gotten to the point where you are constantly living in fear that the next time he uploads, he'll have shaved it all of again.

[@TiffyJiffy0110]

Yes! I've been waiting 3.65 centuries to take this!

[@BrainlessGirl123]

10+ years down the line and he still hasn't run out of video ideas or scripts (and never will).

[@justforyou8790]

u were really gentle with that potato. the other vegetables sure must be jealous.

[@spyr3x738]

Rift ive been a subscriber for a year and a half and i enjoy all your vids including this one 😊

[@bertsteinich]

Yet another great video

[@lulungameena8817]

As always, love your stuff! But I got a good laugh when you got to the brain and talking about bloodflow while pointing to the spinal cord. The nearest major blood vessels there would be the Vertebral Arteries, which join to become the Basilar Artery, which then has several branches but mainly becomes part of the Circle of Willis. Which, if you're of a certain age, would immediately lead to thinking "What'chu talkin' about Willis?" (ok, I make the "What'chu talkin' about Circle of Willis?" joke almost weekly) Hence, the laugh. Back to your regularly scheduled relaxation. Thank you so much for your amazing work!!! 🧠♥🩸

[@eluvianii]

I almost wish I wasn't subscribed yet. Imagine being able to say you're subscribed because you passed the test

[@cnicoj]

I have been successfully examined Mr. Rift !

[@TMCZerker]

Thank you for putting out videos. They really help me. What are the odds of another candy man video? Those are my favorite.

[@silvatouch]

Best way to end my midnight KZbin binge😁

[@Erkaneil]

Watching Rift’s videos out of order is kinda crazy, he always changes his hair length like it is nothing.

[@N51totallynotprivatemilitary]

his barber is a GTA NPC

[@bluchismoon]

I freaked out a bit when you called may name. I hadn't been paying attention and then I thought you were talking to me.

[@Saol.Alainn]

Thank you for making sure Nothing won't hurt us while we're here ❤

[@callumbutler05]

This is probably the funniest asmr video I’ve ever seen. 😂😂

[@oriarowan]

I have been watching you for like a year and a half, and I have just realised I am not subscribed the whole time thanks to this video

[@EphemeralRift]

I should perma ban you then.

[@lordwhoopi9132]

Bro, get out while you can. This ship is sinking hard.

[@clxqc2912]

Great role play, looking forward to my subscriber annual check up to make sure I remain within the qualifications!

[@worstvegan]

less than 10 seconds in and i already got tingles 😂😆

[@domakkeiss2271]

(Superb tingles. Thank you! 💜🙏)