Every Dad Ever

[@joannafoster3423]

Oh my gosh, my dad used almost all of these phrases, but you missed one. "Builds character, puts hair on your chest." -said to his DAUGHTERS!

[@tinaperez7393]

Mine too!!! It's what my dad told my sister and I when we were little when he said we couldn't have coffee! 😂🤣😂 Now with my nephews, I had to change that to "you'll get a uni brow" (couldn't think of something better) cuz I'm guessing hair on chest wasn't the same threat as for girls! 😂🤣😂

[@Bears_editz]

Very stereotypical lol and true

[@redhead7087]

Hahaha. My uncle would say " eat your carrots, it puts hair on your chest" when we were at their house. For year I wouldn't eat carrots there...anywhere else but not at my Uncle and Aunt's house. I was convinced their carrots were poison.

[@joannafoster3423]

@@redhead7087 hilarious!

[@SigningWithTheByrds]

yes!! 😂😂😂😂

[@musiciandeborah1854]

"I'm not sleeping, just resting my eyes." Wow, 100% word perfect. Love it!

[@diamondly6250]

nah my dad would just yell shut up im sleeping 🤣

[@ellianachavez6596]

100% my dad

[@richardredhead]

"I was watching the inside of my eyelids."

[@sunnydaysalltheway]

missed one: "dad Im hungry" "hi hungry, im dad!" ICONIC

[@letitgrow1846]

We can't let the great cycle of fatherly wisdom passed down through the generations end with us. It must be poured forth on our unsuspecting families.

[@nicolemcneely385]

Where would we be without our dads? I thank God every day I have a father who loves me like God loves us. I know your kids feel the same way, Penn.

[@tinaperez7393]

The ridiculous enthusiasm Penn put into these stereotypical, rather almost tired even, "dad" moments made this video fresh and original. What can I say, the guy knows how to sell his part. Had to watch twice, laughed so hard! 😂🤣😂 Whatever the Holderni take on they make gold.

[@ROBERT-hu1wj]

Hello 👋 how are you doing today??

[@busymama7903]

Loved this and many of them made me say ‘Dad, is that you?’ 😂 Missing from this list: “Money doesn’t grow on trees you know!” “Were you born in a barn?” ( if I left a cupboard door open) “Eat it, it will put hair on your chest!” (said to me, his daughter, and my sister!) “Think of the starving kids in Africa!” (when I didn’t want to eat something) “The early bird gets the worm”

[@tgeee]

"Do you think we own stock in the electric company?!" (whenever a light or the t.v. was left on)

[@Costanza-yc9ow]

The starving kids is my dads fav

[@emilyhatfield05]

@Busy Mama Wow, my Dad has literally said every single one of those while I was growing up. All dads really are the same. 😂

[@annachristinanotyet4678]

Now it would be nice to know how many of them hadn't had "as much money as Kid" as they've had as they lived in their own families? Because I think one one hand it's inherited sayings from prior generations but for many it might also be a later historically station...

[@cooperminion825]

Don't forget the hungry joke Kid: I'm hungry Dad: Hi Hungry! I'm Dad

[@canadagirl408]

He just needs to sit in the car waiting for his family to come out and say "we're burning daylight, guys" and he's completely 100% DAD

[@diamondstuddedpunchingbag4718]

My dad passed away in Jan.2021....i miss him so so much...these were some of his favorite sayings... "Your mom wasn't a window maker, move." "Close the door, you're letting out all the bought air!"

[@AG-is8rk]

My Dad would say you weren’t made in a window factory!

[@rubymack4914]

I'm so sorry your loss..💕 Sending love

[@diamondly6250]

my dad died to in 2021 he cracked his spin found out it was because he had a rare cancer thats why it cracked, it made it weak, then he stared to have a vary hard time breathing, then he died this happened with in 5 days im scared for life ~ rest in peace dad😭

[@diamondstuddedpunchingbag4718]

@@diamondly6250 The pain of losing a parent is so hard. You're very strong...you have his legacy to pass on...❤️

[@patriciadurham643]

OMG!!! My husband says every one of those statements!!! It’s not just dads though, it’s every man ever!!! Lol ❤️

[@geniereiman1089]

Love these! When the kids were little if they asked us to open up their bag of chips or candy, we'd always say, "Parent Tax!" and take one. I hear my kids saying it to my grandkids, now.

[@missnaomi613]

Could this be a regional expression? I always called it "my commission." 🤔

[@CG_Hali]

In both Ontario and Quebec, we have no such concept. Never heard anyone use it. When I heard parents do that to their kids Halloween candy I couldn't get it cause parents can buy them anytime, kids can't. We'd be happy to share with parents though cause they enjoyed the candies we didn't as much.

[@SugarandSarcasm]

That happened at Halloween

[@CihaPet]

To this day, any time my wife makes a sandwich for any of us, there will be this mysterious bite taken out of it.

[@sarah-phillips]

This just basically confirms that I’M the one turning into my father. However, it’s been proven that humming the Tetris music when you load up a car ensures everything will fit perfectly.

[@juanitaglenn9042]

Bahaha, I was going to say the same thing! 😉

[@Bears_editz]

Lol

[@maggiepanning356]

Or when putting away groceries after a Costco run.

[@maryo.paddock8093]

In our family it's the MOM (or one of our sons if they're traveling with us) who "play Tetris" with the luggage. My husband has announced on numerous occasions that "It won't all fit" only to have one of us take it as a challenge.

[@sarah-phillips]

@@maggiepanning356 YES. The fridge is the other place in which "it won't fit" makes me say "challenge accepted."

[@Harrisonskywalker]

I wish there was a way I could have wrapped this up and given it to my husband for Father’s Day.

[@katyroberson7725]

Haha love it! Penn you are the quintessential dad! Everytime after my husband ratchets something down he uses that same line "that's not going anywhere"...it's become a huge joke in our family and often he gives me the honors of saying it.

[@SigningWithTheByrds]

LOL 🤣! My husband did this recently and I was convinced I saw it slip in the side mirror. He pulled over in a huff, walked around the truck grabbing the wonky placed chair, saying "It's ratcheted down! it's not going nowhere!" 😂😂😂😂😂

[@elizabethquan4702]

The bit about calculating how far away the storm is? My teenage son is doing that already. 🤗

[@ROBERT-hu1wj]

Hello 👋 how are you doing today??

[@yaelfeder9042]

Lol saying “They’re coming for us” when the sirens come on is definitely a dad joke. My dad said that.

[@Octoberfurst]

When I was a kid, riding in the car with my dad, if we heard a police siren he would always say "Oh no! They're coming to get you!"

[@yaelfeder9042]

@@Octoberfurst 🤣

[@madles47]

My dad LITERALLY said "it's not heavy, its awkward" to me yesterday!!! This is too funny!

[@smo05d]

Tax is a thing in my family too! My grandfather started it when my aunts would bake cookies. My father was thrilled to carry on the tradition and expand it to all food lol

[@judithmitchell4667]

So very true, my friend. I will admit to most of them myself and I'm a mom. Thank you for making me smile. Blessings - Judith 🎭

[@ROBERT-hu1wj]

Hello 👋 how are you doing today?

[@kevinkeller6898]

Really close to home. On almost every point. As far as I'm concerned, you validate me as a father. Thank you!

[@Alnpaint]

Oh my gosh seeing your "NEIGHBOR" out of character was awesome because we have no idea what her actual personality is like😂

[@tinaperez7393]

I enjoyed that too! I would like to see her as more characters! A goth or Emo teen would be interesting! 😂😁

[@AutumnK]

To me it was the most shocking to hear her without the thick midwestern accent.

[@heidiwalker7123]

My dad would always say you make a better door then a window when I was a kid ! Thank you for bringing me down memory lane !

[@hollishan]

My spouse always says "You make a better door than a window!" And of course, the Tetris'd trunk of the car. 😁 As always, thanks for the great video!

[@holdernessfamilylaughs]

Thanks for watching 😄

[@hahas71]

My husband has two main sayings: 1. "I can build that" which he says when I want to buy any new item for the house. The man cannot build shelf to save his life! 2. "Is it free." Which he say everytime a waiter or customer service asks him if he wants to upgrade to something bigger or better. They of course say "no" and he says "then why would I want pay more for something I don't want?" Used to embarrass the heck out of me but now, after 14 years, I just laugh it off. He is who he is.

[@honolulublues5548]

That was my dad, but he also had this one... If the wait staff at a restaurant came to the table and said something to the effect of, "Is there anything else I can get you?", He'd inevitably say "A bundle of twenties"! My mom grew tired of it and one of the last times he said this she said, "you've been saying that for 30 years, it's time to change it to at least fifties"!

[@markukesalot3082]

“Are you trying to cool the whole neighborhood?” When front door left open more than 4 seconds.

[@mhedstrom]

Watched this with my husband and both of us were ON THE FLOOR because he says 90% of these. Will show it to son when he gets home. The one you forgot which I've heard husband and multiple other dads use, "How am I? I'm livin' the dream!" Favorites were the packing one, and definitely the "plate is clear and saying 'send it back.'" I do the GPS one though more than he does. :)

[@razz4taz]

Oh my stars! This is how I was brought up. (Widowed father) I'm a 45 yr old woman and do almost every single one of these. 😊

[@Takara8tt]

Was literally packing my car trunk today with my dad, and he was humming the Tetris theme just like Penn 😂

[@michellebiggerstaff6841]

"Your dad wasn't a glass maker." That's what we heard. The hubby will leave that last bite of the cone, especially if it has the chocolate in it, and see if I want it.

[@kellymhanson]

My dad always left that last bite of cone for our dog (now passed away). This was the only human food our dog was allowed to have and it was an infrequent treat. Our dog would sit stock still at his side, not moving a muscle the entire time Dad was eating the cone, trying to be such a good boy. Except he was drooling all over the floor.

[@yvonnepalmquist8676]

As the mom my boys often heard "Momma didn't make you out of glass." I'm pretty sure though, my dad did use the door/window reference.

[@justsomenobody889]

"It's not heavy, it's just awkward" is my husband's most predictable line 😄

[@denisefallin8042]

Y'all crack me up. I love his cackle after a "dad pronouncement". 🤣 Thanks for another great video

[@odysseyflyer]

The packing and the thunderstorm are so true for my Dad. When he packs the car for vacations, we just let him do his thing because he has the packing down to a science.

[@pawspaper7878]

The gas station....yes! My husband drives me crazy with that one. 🤔😂

[@garlandajoyce1980]

Hahaha fully admit I do some of these things & my husband does none 😂 I always tell my kids I am gonna make them pay the light bill, they leave the lights on ALL the time.

[@monicalee82]

Same here!! 😂

[@MAILLADY2010]

I still look over my shoulder when I touch the thermostat ... I was alive too see the landing on the moon 🤪

[@tracyjordan4477]

Lots of moms too! LOL!

[@matt5415]

I’m using that “could you send it back” joke. It will drive my wife and teen daughter nuts.

[@austinhannemann2615]

Lol I also like the time honored tradition of talking to your kids friends funny/weird questions like “so what’s happening in this shin dig?” And then act so surprised when your kids say your embarrassing them

[@kynn23]

I'm not a dad, but I am excellent at car Tetris. I love that Penn sang the song while doing it.

[@WeLuvWDW]

My dad is 93 so in addition to those phrases you used (which, by the way, both my parents combined used all of them) Dad would say he liked bananas because they had appeal (get it? a peel? Yeah, he'd say that afterward each time).

[@ROBERT-hu1wj]

Hello 👋 how are you doing today??

[@ByakkøGAMING777]

0:08 The feels

[@azureshade2958]

"you make a better door than a window" lol my dad would always say "You're drinking muddy water!" seriously though, this was 95% my dad 😂

[@hemaccabe4292]

Thanks Penn for getting our day started with a smile. Cape (Cake?) Buffalo rides again!

[@katherinew1538]

This is actually the perfect hybrid of both my mom and my dad. 😂

[@ROBERT-hu1wj]

Hello 👋 how are you doing today??

[@DrgnflyDrmz]

😆 most of this is ME! 🙋🏻‍♀️ And I’m not a dad! 😂

[@brandontomblin8406]

I actually enjoy sitting out on a covered porch and listening to the rain. It's relaxing.

[@gustavosuarez3096]

🤣😂🤣😂 I've done all of that so I guess I've been in the dad club for some time now

[@DaveGled]

“Daddy Tax” 🤣 Hadn’t heard that one before…. 🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@libbykat3958]

Haha more of these are me than my husband! The "don't tell your mum" message (but inferred, not spoken) and repacking the car are mainly him - he is the BEST at packing the car!

[@ellatentindo7911]

Not the dad wheez and laugh

[@sydney3569]

“I am not asleep I am resting my eyes” -My dad every night

[@shaunah.creations9233]

My husband has said the rain part lol. My toddler son now does it too 😂

[@jefflangdon4621]

Haha, I sing the Tetris theme when packing the car.

[@madmommy]

My dad ALWAYS said our ice cream was dripping. He also NEVER ordered his own cone. Loved Penn singing the Tetris tune!

[@pxljedi999]

OMG! This IS my hubby. Everything Penn said is what my hubby says too.

[@gypsybelle4757]

😂 I’ve heard so many of these! Perfection!❤️❤️❤️

[@yvonnepalmquist8676]

He missed one. "Are you writing a book? Well, leave that chapter out of it."

[@kelseyredford219]

I do so many of these things. I love when he was packing the car and singing the Tetris theme.

[@BlueViper8907]

Who doesn't finish an ice cream cone?!

[@Scrapqueen65]

🤣🤣🤣. The gas station joke was right on!! It all was, but my hubby will drive two towns over for the cheapest gas! I just roll my eyes! Gotta love him!

[@MsAubrey]

Just to save $.50 on a tank. XD

[@chocolateandbooks]

Many of these are more me than my husband. Made it doubly great that we both can laugh at it

[@nicoleb4077]

Most accurate Dad video EVER 😄😄😄

[@Mrs.Laird1234]

This is spot on! My husband just recently introduced our kids to the "daddy tax."

[@jorlowsky469]

“Everything thing come out okay”? Lmao I used to hear that a lot. I still use it on my friends lol

[@steelsheen]

totally understand the blooper about the fries 😅 thats also what i order regularly at the McD's even if i dont care for much of anything else to go with it.🍟🍟🍟

[@soxkoglunibaba6306]

The gal in the back seat is so very funny. Glad your neighbors participate. Makes it crazier!!

[@triciadukes9201]

Watching the rain. Every Southern Dad EVER!

[@johncaswell2648]

Yes especially to the tetris theme while packing boxes/suitcases/whatever into a small space!

[@laurad3497]

My dad used to say “I didn’t get a haircut, I got my ears lowered”

[@lunava5489]

Seriously these dad phrases are UNIVERSAL!

[@tinaperez7393]

2:08 - the first time I ever saw the 90's hip hop lyrics FRAMED and hanging IN THEIR HOUSE!!! 😂🤣😂 Let me guess: those are either Penn's idea or somebody's (Kim's?) gift to him. HILARIOUS!!

[@kynn23]

I grinned at the sight of those!

[@ashleyfriedrich9856]

“Everything come out okay?” I almost spit out my drink

[@lizh6420]

This is like every dad joke ever - and it's so true, lol

[@keiyangoshin3650]

“I’m not sleeping. Just resting my eyes.” - Every day. Twice. 😂

[@positivemindset30]

Love when dads finish your food. Especially at weddings, the adults give so much, you can't finish it, so when u full side the plate over to dad.

[@elizabethhoyle9155]

My mom would always say, "I could make that myself," when we shopped for clothes.

[@mikemeyerphotopro]

YES!!! I love sitting on my porch and watching the rain. I wish I lived somewhere it rained more. Northern VA can be kinda dry in the summer :( Ketchikan Alaska is nice and rainy :)

[@YouWillRecycle]

Now Kim needs to make a Mom version. It's only fair since I'm a Dad and guilty of everything in the video.

[@DeliahAyala.2.14.91.]

The bottom part/handle of the cone is the best part who would throw that away 😮

[@annadefeo8652]

I rolled my eyes at so many of these and laughed. Was that cowfish sushi burger bar I saw?

[@ROBERT-hu1wj]

Hello 👋 how are you doing today??

[@laceym314]

As a single mom, I know Ice said every single one of those at least once. I must be part dad.

[@jennifershook9879]

I just taught my 9 year old the “you make a better door than a window” saying! Too funny!

[@michellemunn7959]

Omg the door than a window line. Is definitely the one I heard from my dad

[@charlesjonestherednecknerd]

At this time, I can neither confirm nor deny the allegations set before me. Next question please? Great video as always guys!

[@richardmahn7589]

3:15 Get your kids involved! LOL

[@Lord_Dillinger]

OMG! Yas! You nailed it, im crying!!! Laughing my literal butt off!

[@KindredSpirit1010]

I actually always finished my dad's food. He would order a giant steak seafood platter with salad bar and eat half the steak, half the crab and a couple of bites of a baked potato, one bite of salad if that. 🙄 Then he would eat a giant fudge sundae and insist on getting me my own so he didn't have to share it. He would ask me what I wanted when we ordered entrees and I would just say, "I can just finish your food." Kinda like when moms with small children don't actually eat lunch they just eat the peanut butter jelly crusts and leftover baby carrots, etc. as they are loading the dish washer. Lol.

[@tinaperez7393]

Too funny! 😮😂 This makes me think of Patton Oswalt's skit on eating at restaurants with huge portions. "And our corn chowder....served in a canoe!" (or something like that). I'm sure the audio version of that skit is on KZbin. You might want to look it up, It's hilarious! I just looked it up - it's under Patton oswalt Black Angus Steakhouse. I gave to warm though he's made cleaner versions. This one's funny as heck but definitely has the bluer language. 😮🤨🤔

[@ronwaters478]

Thanks for the laugh on this cold, wet day ! One more: "I know the GPS says take 'this road', but I'm *sure* going this other way is faster". Then cut to shot of a three mile long traffic jam. 🙂

[@jad9479]

Right on. Done most of that👍

[@thatweirdgirl1977]

I've just discovered that I'm actually every dad ever 😂

[@Brad_Myers]

Now checking Amazon for Readers with Lights built in. Thanks Penn.

[@Fox-Mann-Fam]

Yep. This is my dad and now my husband... though to be fair, I'm the one who makes all the puns and dad jokes.

[@spaceghost5026]

Oh man. This is more like me than I'm comfortable admitting!

[@DavidPlass]

Own it! I say many of those things too.

[@avaheggie5698]

These phrases are my dad too! I love you guys. The videos that you guys do are hilarious 😂.

[@haleyanne86]

🤔 some of these apply to my dad, but not all of them. Mostly, the ones where he'll say "I'm not sleeping, just resting my eyes" and the Home Depot/Lowe's where he says "I don't need help. I know this place like the back of my hand." 🤣

[@richardagnew4959]

FRIGHTENINGLY accurate! 😵‍💫

[@britter21bb]

“Just resting my eyes!” Totally my husband!!! And my father!!! Is there a common Dad phrases book that they secretly get when they become dads???🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@Grim_Sister]

My dad used to say “Hey, here’s your class!” When we passed herds of sheep 🤣

[@NinerK]

0:52-1:15 this is me on every road trip. The great thing about having 5 kids is that you get it all….admiration, adoration, disgust and sympathy from the various ages of your kids.

[@Lashlove16]

Dad trying to get containers on the car roof - my husband who ruins everything trying to do one thing Cheap gas guy -my dad Sleepy dad - my mom Organizer trunk dad - me This video is soooooo relatable loool

[@thetaxladies5615]

“Do it in 18!” OMGOSH! Sooo true