Every Species Still Tells Stories About The Day Deathworlders Decided To Stop Being Nice | HFY

[@Vindicare172]

The idea of Jenkins just staring at the aliens while smacking his wrench on things was a mental image that made me burst out laughing. Just a dude staring you straight in the eyes not saying anything and hitting shit with a wrench, that broke me lol

[@kiwimac]

Neither is Dave replied shuffling

[@BrentRogers5]

"And they haven't revealed their final form yet, humans who had gotten enough sleep and were fully caffeinated!"

[@Dysan72]

That was good, But it was "Not with a bang, but a perfectly filed wimper" that broke me.

[@jernada6794]

"Oh we will still have coffee... But we are not sharing"... best line

[@m.jasondoty9062]

"A species that runs on caffeine and spite" was mine.

[@OrlaCarey]

I might need to figure out how to put this quote on a t-shirt "never underestimate a species that runs on caffeine thrives on spite and has elevated passive aggressive behavior to an art form"

[@orionstickguard790]

When you come out with the shirt please let me know, I'm buying 7 of them is XXL size.

[@katelynnkocur6245]

I want that shirt

[@deboraharmstrong3002]

Can I get mine in seven different colors? I HATE when people accuse me of wearing the same clothes every day!

[@dominiking69]

leaving this here for potential merch

[@kotypetersen9282]

Find a shop, sometimes they’re little kiosks in malls, or an online site that allows custom graphics. Some of them are decently priced.

[@r.kellycoker1981]

Actually, this is one of the better stories in a long time.

[@wolfgamerv2321]

12:41 The star didn't go supernova for fear of paperwork baahahah😂😂😂

[@ArgonianSkaleel]

aliens would be horrified about the many storied of various human bureaucratic departments sending letters to *graveyards* because the recipient couldn't be reached at their most recently filed address due to death.

[@wolfgamerv2321]

@@ArgonianSkaleel I'm sorry *WHAT?* They send letters to graveyards?

[@roepi]

@@wolfgamerv2321 Never underestimate bureaucrats... and their ability to stubbornly ignore reality in favor of rules and procedures.

[@AsobiMedio]

@@roepi Bureaucrats only follow the rules given to them dutifully. Blame the morons who wrote and refuse to revise the terrible rules.

[@HelghastDiver]

Even stellar bodies flinch at 3 million papers to request to just get permission to go supernova.

[@KurNorock]

This is like a mix between the bureaucrat aliens in hitchhikers guide to the galaxy, and the TVA from the Loki series.

[@paulyguitary7651]

This 100% went for that Hitchhikers Guide feel from the very beginning. It even felt like it was in the same universe. Even the choice of ai tts reflects this.

[@paulyguitary7651]

“Paperwork is not just my middle name.” -Dave Paperwork Jones probably

[@ccsorn]

"Brown crayon water"😂 This was a great way to start my morning.

[@TheBetterManInBlack]

Okay, this story is definitely a high water mark for the genre. And you made it almost 28 minutes before 'palpable' made its inevitable appearance.

[@darcreven5497]

Caffeine and spite😂. Sound's like what gets everyone to work on a Monday

[@rebeccaconlon9743]

As a homemaker and mother...Mondays are the worst... where the children have to change routine again etc... everyone hates mondays

[@Magpiebard]

Caffeine, spite and the desperate drive to remind ourselves that Friday is just a few more days away. I think only the understanding Monday comes once a week is something that likely keeps a lot of the human race from just mass jumping off bridges. Monday is dread. Friday is hope for reconstruction. And possibly the promise of sleeping in and a drink.

[@Iceburgh6901]

The author of this story should take a bow for how close they got to Douglas Adams' humor, but that'd require form 8742b filed in decadoduplicate.

[@susansnook9801]

And it has to be sent out, sent back, and digested by the ravenous Bugblatter beast of Traal....

[@Iceburgh6901]

@@susansnook9801 In triplicate.

[@timobrien2813]

A brilliant story and an apt critique of our times. Thank you very much. UKUK

[@RealEnerjak]

Malicious compliance. That's just evil.😂

[@jnorth3341]

But it is so much fun....

[@davidbeattie4294]

Silly good fun. Great story.

[@americanpatriot4227]

These are just hilarious! GREAT imagination ... funny as heck and just makes my day when I hear one of these. If you haven't listened to this yet - DO SO, make sure you have a cup of coffee...........🤣

[@JeremyM127]

This happens every time my company's superiors come up with a new and already tried and failed plan we just nod and do it as the said it fails and we return to normal.

[@matthewscottshea]

We need more of these comedic sci fi stories. Peak Hitchhikers Guide feel to this one.

[@JCDenton2012Modder]

If aliens think this is bad, they should try Earth's own DMV... [ominous thunder ripple]

[@The-Ent1ty]

Don't. Fucking. Say. It.

[@wirralnomad]

This is exactly what I have been looking for, I am so sick of the humans are perfect, humans are superior crap, I want more HFY Comedy!

[@boqndimitrov8693]

finally something original! 😂no shiny super dreadnoughts, no superman deathworlders from australia! good story, and lots of humor! hallelujah! 😅👍

[@SandraNelson063]

The universe NEEDS Daves. We're bleeped without them. And they don't have to be nice about it. 😊

[@raymondcarter1137]

Woohooo! A story about a admin! I have nothing but good will for admin because they helped me so much and they were so patient. I even got a follow up call to check if everything was in order. Without those people I would have been in deep poop.

[@DemonicKage]

Whoever wrote this, I want more. Definitely has Hitchhikers Guide vibes.

[@madjack7777]

This concept really leans on The Hitchikers Guide to the galaxy. The story of the two arks.

[@jeffwobrak5205]

When the stack of forms reached the size of a small moon, we all questioned our life choices. I and 50 other recruits learned this at MEPS on the Deathworld called Earth back in the 82nd year of their 20th century.

[@GrigoriZhukov]

Ha, that was the easy part. Then it got recursive space time at CIF. Because, well if you weren't at CIF.

[@hua_man]

Former Supply here. Your complaints mean nothing.

[@jeffwobrak5205]

@hua_man 😄😄😄 I salute your comment with chuckles in triplicate.

[@squirrelking4174]

This has serious “hitchhikers guide to the galaxy” vibes

[@destodelvita112]

This is gold! D

[@IH-ku3zf]

Myself, I work in administration. This video had me laughing so hard, I had tears in my eyes . Absolutely made my day. Thank you! ❤

[@madi4642]

Somehow human saying "hold my drink" is normal. And Human following the rules? The universe take a brake and the laws cower for they have to follow the rules!!!😂😂😂

[@N0M4OFFICIAL]

"Never underestimate a species that runs on caffeine and spite." sums up the military tbh XD

[@Warrior-Of-Virtue]

I have always believed that whoever invented coffee deserved to be immortalized in the finest marble.

[@karlrenaut5799]

lol. this feels very Douglas Adams. i love it.😂😂😂😂

[@catseye10000]

I fail to see how this makes humans look badass. it's just funny

[@TheSpacePyro]

Jenkins out there hitting machines with a wrench like the engineer from team fortress two

[@williamahrens5737]

Omg, it feels like I'm listening to a Terry Pratchett story

[@Team.WorldTour]

Only if Sir Pratchett was trying to copy Douglas Adams!

[@seankane8628]

A "Rule Book Slowdown " the ultimate revenge

[@target4all766]

One Cup of Coffee to rule them all! Another This is No Moon this is a Starbucks!

[@vanhasydan4754]

Here I am getting ready for work and trying not to laugh so hard I wake my neighbors.

[@jazzk4072]

Amazing. Worthy of sir Pratchett.

[@michelejones6785]

This is a good one!!

[@DumpsterBug]

I couldn't stop laughing at this one lol

[@Saradomusic6402]

ahhhhhh... it seems the turns have tabled....

[@toomanyjstoomanyrs1705]

Glad to know that Rickrolling is still a thing centuries from now.

[@OShackHennessy]

Man this one gave me a good laugh, very well done

[@MiguelPBlueFox]

"the truth is... the game was rigged from the start"

[@keithmays8076]

This is straight up a scene from Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy.😂😂😂

[@Joe-f3z3n]

After hearing that one I had to go double check my coffee maker and make sure I didn't have it programmed to make coffee on its own

[@MiguelVargassagraVleugiM]

The room conference in the closet gave me Stargate feels...

[@altorins]

Was not expecting a Rickroll in there.

[@auryc7]

Such a good story. I about died laughing. Amazingly good writing.

[@kyrenthang8633]

Very "Douglas Adams-esque" 😆.

[@turtlefive8392]

Hilarious live it!

[@madi4642]

Ohhh no they made the Humans follow the rules😂😂😂😂

[@kathleencandelaria4106]

Clerks rule the world we have always known this.

[@donnamlake6303]

Well enough done that I want to share it with my husband.

[@Team.WorldTour]

Is this from The Hitchhikers Guide? Does Doug know?

[@toddjm50]

Love it

[@giljensen1132]

Nice

[@konekillerking]

Rodriguez is here, waiting for form 47B. Interpretive dance present, really beginning to think that these stories are the result of some class assignment with certain common themes. Rick rolled again.

[@theeddorian]

A well-written story for once. The speech to text feature still struggles with simple things.

[@lairddougal3833]

Ah, Rodriguez appears again. She gets around.

[@lairddougal3833]

What exactly is the ‘noise a jello makes when having an existential crisis’?

[@ChristoFerrus]

HEY!!! our brains are small but has high density!

[@antsquirly7654]

Fardles, our methods have been found.

[@surferdude4487]

I have this dim recollection from Niven's Inferno about a circle of Hell where the paperwork had to all be filled out in quintuplicate, there was no carbon paper and even if there was, none of the blanks lined up. Did you take some inspiration from there?

[@Donvinox]

Whre the humans germans by chance, this burocrazy seems like their doing....

[@jernada6794]

Performance based pay, and 40 hours in an office with coffee and you will marble at the passive aggressive bureaucracy that can be made..

[@matthewsykes4814]

Now this is just not on..... I like coffee, it is quite tasty but I am unsettled by the lack of tea..... I demand Tea, Yorkshire Gold, 2 and a splash. I have submitted the relevant forms to all relevant universes. Still waiting..... getting thirsty....

[@Kentavritsa]

this is "Exactly" why PAT-ronizing is so wrong ..

[@mileslugo6430]

Is hitting things with a wrench considered as Engineering or Technical work.

[@GrayPenn-w1r]

This story is funny.

[@s1rm1k36]

Lol Rick Rolled

[@SavageShooter93]

So you are telling me AI can take a few descriptions and produce images but we cant figure out how to incorporate a spell check into that system?

[@catpapadopoulos4423]

Heeyyyy.... Head pays should be optional... I want de head pats

[@thominaduncanson7596]

Well done, indeed! Your certificate of Meritorious Compliance, along with your rank badge of Malicious Thorn Branch, First Class, and your Special Recognition Parking Pass, will be mailed to your domicile by this week’s end (sooner if the triple espresso machine is repaired).

[@rebeccaconlon9743]

Dont get them on energy drinks then... guava has caffeine

[@lacucaracha111111]

How to fight the Vogons

[@dorugu]

lool their worst nightmares has just come thro and they cant say or do anything bout it they made the ruls so :)

[@jingbot1071]

Okay, but dark matter deserves democracy

[@Zara-tt7rh]

This is ridiculous, just wait till Reddit shorts the intergalactic stock market. Is this a full series or set of books, or random stories only??? Help!!

[@reesofraft4166]

please - at least go over the automatically created subtitles and correct them, and USE punctuation! nice, that Ai reads and creates subtitles - but please correct all those mistakes and give us proper subtitles. who ever is not a native speaker gets subtitles that tell a completely different story.

[@SavageGinger78]

🤣🤣🤣❤

[@bassetHoynd]

This would make a funny youtube clip...

[@marcusmoreno1691]

If Canadians took over the earth

[@lacucaracha111111]

Coffeve

[@rebeccaconlon9743]

So evolved but still using paper?

[@mcgill9757]

🤣 👍