Fifty Shades of Grey - Movie Review

[@NealX]

Man, I really wish critics could finally agree on a movie for once. Jeremy Jahns called this movie dog shit, but Chris calls it _rat_ shit. I DON'T KNOW WHO TO BELIEVE.

[@thewarlock539]

looool XD

[@idawg7332]

+Neal X Both its a mixture of all kinds of shit

[@Stardweller1]

+Neal X It pretty much amounts to the same thing either way.

[@maximussaktish]

didnt jeremy called this movie nothing

[@umphreak9999]

+Neal X maybe the dog ate the rat shit and shitted it out?

[@casualfanatic4217]

The prize bag opening had more excitement than the movie

[@MrChaotic4]

It has been proven that a film about sexual discovery can be great. For example, Eyes Wide Shut.

[@STOCKHOLM07]

or Secretary, for that matter, which is a film about BDSM and not terrible.

[@thedanceparty7839]

Jacob Voronkov LMAO from that comment!😂😂😂😂

[@rickycollins7723]

"I Thought this was something else" (lip Balm) "Fifty shades of F*cking Sh*t" "I wish I had this (blindfold) during the movie" *Rips in half shirt and poster*

[@mintfreightage7670]

Yep.

[@Martin97311]

I feel like I laughed way too much when he looked at the contents of his raffle winning.

[@bookyreviewzola]

Me too I love his reviews

[@aryankaushik9346]

Especially when he said he though the lip balm was something else. (You do know what he meant right?)

[@LLawliet-tv9ig]

+Mine MLG Unfortunately, I do.......................I love Chris's review tho. This one is so funny.

[@HorrorFan-gg7bw]

Same!

[@leftertiberiuvlad]

Excellent video content! Excuse me for chiming in, I am interested in your initial thoughts. Have you heard the talk about - Mahorrla Mens Institution Method (Sure I saw it on Google)? It is a smashing one off product for finding the perfect man without the normal expense. Ive heard some unbelievable things about it and my old buddy Taylor after a lifetime of fighting got excellent success with it.

[@BlargeMan]

His face when he saw the blindfold: "I'm so fucking done."

[@Buzz-Mcfly]

I'm so stoked to see this tomorrow night! ........wait, nevermind, this isn't the Kingsman review.

[@Michael-fs1cw]

Maaaaannn. Kingsman fucking rules. I've seen it twice now. Enjoy!

[@ImTrollingRetards]

oh hey, i see you on all the mega64 videos. what a small world.

[@Melllllzy]

Michael Little it's excellent, right?!?!?! Knocked my socks.

[@InsideJacobsMind]

Michael Little Also seen it twice, love it.

[@abbreviateddisc]

Kingsman was kickass.

[@RocketHouse54]

"50 Shades of Total Fucking Shit" -Chris Stuckmann 2015

[@ginoames]

I laughed out loud at that line!

[@danielskelton8633]

Same.😂

[@gennagravely3006]

+RocketHouse54 Same that was good.

[@karo306]

I spit on my screen when he said that

[@Mf7d89]

You people don't get it, chris is ranting about one dimensional characters. No one is completely weak in every aspect of life and a complete badass in every aspect. Women in films are being made into 2 archetypes that are horrible for films and unrealistic in the real world. Its that simple.

[@DrFamine]

Thank you.

[@krboops26]

true

[@johnnyboy513]

Totally agree

[@ItsSomeDeadGuy]

THANK YOU

[@quietfolk3920]

I didn't think I'd find someone with sense here. Gracias!

[@fahadabdullahomer5172]

that nicolas cages laugh

[@enigmaskull3495]

That’s how I laugh when I watch a bad movie.

[@AstroKitty]

God I love Nicolas Cage

[@jmorel42]

r/onetruegod

[@AstroKitty]

The holy grail... Thankyou for showing me the way.

[@jarjarjacobs]

I can now die in peace, knowing that this exists.

[@enzoroman8164]

Wtf astro I'm binge watching Chris's videos and I see u here?

[@NitroSpidey]

"Not The Bees!!!" - Our Lord and saviour Nicholas Cage.

[@floriannarratio8062]

I wish the movie was starring Nicolas Cage, who would just run around in a bear costume and punch people in the face. Same value as a story, but so much more entertaining.

[@DrFamine]

Would the porn still be included?

[@cblake7462]

Fifty Shades of Cage?

[@jbwright14]

Caitlyn Blake I would absolutely go see that.

[@gilm0522]

"PADDINGTON SAID WE SHOULD MEET FACE TO FIST!!!"

[@cblake7462]

***** BDSM... with bear suits and bees. "Not the bees! Oh God yes, the bees!"

[@Yahiko25]

I cannot believe I am saying this but I finally found a romance story that is much worst than Twilight. I never thought that would be possible, but this movie and book did it.

[@eliroth9978]

Believe it

[@jlmillustration]

+Yahiko25 Jeremy Jahns actually says "Mark this day, I am going to make a comparison to Twilight as the POSITIVE. What have we come to as a society?" Watch his review. It's amazing.

[@GenderIsAConstruct]

+Yahiko25 only a fanfic based of twilight can be worse than twilight

[@lunad27]

I watched it. I just found a new critic to watch. :D

[@atticushowle2571]

I died when I saw the blindfold XD

[@Outlaw8908]

I died when I saw the ball gag looking lip balm

[@xiii0722]

+Atticus Howle me too XD

[@prestonswanson7160]

me 2

[@atticushowle2571]

+Outlaw8908 4:48 you can see his horror XD

[@Outlaw8908]

Atticus Howle lol

[@hd891011]

"We are seeing some really awful, weak ass female characters. What are you writers doing out there? Come on, give some better roles to women." Preach.

[@StayFractalesque]

I agree.. I wonder why women don't write more scripts and get movies made to represent themselves

[@HeySarahdactyl]

As a woman, I am pretty sick and tired of the whole weak ass female who needs a man character trope, and usually, seeing it in a movie just irritates me. But I have never, EVER felt more uncomfortable while watching a movie than with Fifty Shades of Grey. It was honestly sickening. It didn't come off as anything less than abuse in its purest form. I actually had a head ache from frowning so much after the movie was over.

[@jamiekagemori1299]

+Sarah June I looked at The BillBoard Poster for this movie and I was like "Really? It's just porn..." And then I saw it.....Worst movie. Ever. Weak ass female characters annoy me. Most girls and Older women I know know how to Handle themselves. This is Why Scarlet Johansen Is a great Actor! She plays roles where she Can handle herself and kick Ass, But also Want someone to love, but isn't reliant on him!

[@drummerhere]

I treat you like a woman. A nice dinner and I'd pay for the check.

[@umairfarooq4951]

I cannot feel what you are experiencing because I am a guy. But I feel sorry for you and all women out there. I have not seen the movie (but why would I?) However after seeing this review, I thought of all the disgusting objectification (if thats a word) and general negative attitudes towards women and just want to say how sorry I am because of the awful world we live in and I hope sexism stops for good someday.

[@HeySarahdactyl]

Umair Farooq Thank you! That's really wonderful of you to say and it means a lot to me! :)

[@umairfarooq4951]

+Sarah June You're welcome but its simply just the truth

[@Inbetweener]

Best review ever

[@Banksy793]

I was trying to contain my laughter. The rat-crap part cracked me up!

[@RustCohle072]

nic cage made it even better

[@ZiasPpPp]

***** one day, I'm gonna to a be a director and I'm gonna to film rat shit and called the movie "50 Shades of Grey". It will be better than the original one.

[@SilverSilverope]

i thought the lip balm was.. .......*cough* one of those *cough* vibrating eggs

[@jubilee285]

+Choo Choo Vrrrrrrmmmmmm

[@daddydangerous20]

You perv....:D

[@lunad27]

I thought it was a ball gag at first.

[@hellsing3062]

Dicky Collins ohh c'mon, a dildo that small? For whom? A cat in heat?

[@rafaelmarkos4489]

Hell Sing That's probably the only audience that would appreciate this movie, since they can't comprehend its awfulness.

[@sawyersabol2245]

this is one the funniest reviews I saw from his channel

[@fathaja179]

I feel bad for the curious T-shirt though xD~ I can use it as a substitute for my pj's it looks warm

[@2012thefreshprince]

it's actually his most unprofessional review todate...he really lost some points here

[@orestmarkheva7325]

Alon Bar like point of reviewing 50 shades of grey?

[@scoogsy]

Go what his hilariocity reviews. They are awesome!

[@koek1122]

Some lines of this movie.. just some random quotes: " I don't make love.. I f*ck. .. hard" " I'm. .50 Shades of f*ked up" just so you know the level or commitment to this movie.

[@emmatheresa6948]

I found that line about not making love hilarious, it jus sounded to stilted and unsexy.

[@jayjohnson6677]

Gregory mantonios Literal quotes from the book. I was like sooooooooo they not gonna change that a little or nope okay this is an audiobook

[@koek1122]

emma Theresa The 50+ moms and my girlfriend were mad that i was laughing at that scene :$

[@szkokee]

Gregory mantonios yeah and he is that big guy but when it comes to the sex contract he accept so fast what Anastasia dont want in it like i dunno xD oh yeah and the sex he does is a completely normal making love stuff, not even hard sex. main problem with this movie that lot of people sees it not a porn movie (becasue that makes them less worthy) but a true beatiful love story who everyone should dream about

[@kats938]

Gábor Oh my Goodness! People are actually taking this seriously and find this romantic all at the same time? Those poor bastards. When taken seriously, it's literally about a stalker and an idiot with absolutely no chemistry yet somehow become completely codependent of each other. How could anyone see that as romantic? That's why I choose to take this story lightly. It's less of an insult on my intelligence and my view on relationships. Those who think 50 Shades is a beautiful love story may have never encountered actual people in the course of their lives. EVER. Poor bastards.

[@sesame8010]

"50 shades of total fucking shit"

[@JeffSchmitz]

soft pron for soccer moms

[@mos_x_insan3110]

Fifty shades of gay.

[@ConnorLockhartYGO]

I think Jeremy Jahns came up with better. "Fifty Shades of Socially Acceptable Porn Your Girlfriend's Gonna Insist She's Allowed to Watch Even if She Just Made You Delete your Entire Digital Stash (I know, it's completely unfair. The hypocrisyyyy...)"

[@akebalucas6798]

Lol. Just happened to look at this comment as he said it

[@akebalucas6798]

Jeff Schmitz no...soccer moms would laugh at this shit too

[@cloedoso3724]

"What the hell?.... Oh it's lip balm..." I'M SCREAMING

[@nievesofficial]

Joey is it really you

[@cloedoso3724]

TheRobloxian09 Yes, it's me. How you doin?

[@nievesofficial]

Dr Drake Ramoray *Blushes*

[@llamalloyd3196]

@@nievesofficial so whats the relation between u two?

[@_mel_9953]

Llama Lloyd This whole comment thread is my favourite thing

[@soniap8573]

I laughed so hard when he opened the prize

[@themoisterme9212]

Me too

[@dekotaw12902]

Same😂😂😂

[@CaffeineDeprivation]

Same here XD . I even had tears in my eyes

[@thomastremblay3458]

Sonia P i laughes even more when he destroyed the poster and the t-shirt...

[@AlanWillsSEF]

yes! his look on his face was priceless! fuckin lip balm and a sleeping mask and a candle they got at the Dollar General store for $1. what the deuce! and a extra small T-shirt. I'd rip that up too. or give it to someone I hate lmbo.

[@shafiksayegh2966]

his reaction when he first saw the lip balm😂😂

[@many_lives4925]

Lol his eyes said "what the f***************k?"

[@many_lives4925]

@Season Season I'm pretty sure he thought it was a butt plug or something.

[@vikkipink1288]

THANK YOU FOR THE BIT ABOUT THE NEED FOR STRONG FEMALE CHARACTERS OMFG

[@reaper7684]

watch kill bill

[@MattDoesLife539]

My sister watches that movie everytime she broke up with her bf. Its funny to me.

[@reaper7684]

or lucy

[@reaper7684]

or hungers games

[@reaper7684]

i love chris but he is just talking nonsense about lack of strong female characters

[@AstraVex]

Didn't the author write the whole book on her Blackberry phone? Because if that's true, it fucking shows! xD *(nicolas cage laugh)*

[@captainjakemerica4579]

Yes agreed 50 Shades of Grey is an atrocity towards any medium it is a part of.

[@2012thefreshprince]

best selling book and huge success on the box office - that shows better!

[@AstraVex]

Alon Bar So was Twilight but that was big pile of shit too! xD

[@harvsthenerve1942]

@@2012thefreshprinceYou, my good Sir, need help.

[@VultureClone]

He has no idea how right he is about female characters being constantly written as weak, clingy and needing a man above all else. The women I know who like 50 shades are very needy and weak, but the women who hate 50 shades have other priorities other than getting a man, and the latter want to see movies where a female character's main goal is not to get some guy to fall in love with her. It would be nice if they did that.. I actually thought the woman in 'Edge of tomorrow' was a nice change until she went all soft and dewy-eyed over Tom Cruise's character.

[@mattiej2311]

VultureClone well then using that logic, i guess nearly all the male heroes are weak because their knees buckle and they fall in love with a woman?

[@VultureClone]

mattiej2311 I didn't say the man had to fall in love. I don't want anyone to fucking get all lovey dovey. Why can't the male and female just not fall in love for once? You know? It doesn't always have to be, "Oh well we have a man and woman here, so...I guess they're gonna have to fall madly in love with each other. There's nothing else we can do here."

[@mattiej2311]

VultureClone they can write their story however they want. if that's what they think will cause the best movie then so be it

[@VultureClone]

mattiej2311 I realise they can write whatever they want. The problem is that's all they write about and it's just getting a tad tiring. But that's just me.

[@jaredschumann3751]

One word: furiosa

[@samfraser767]

A+ use of Nicolas Cage

[@jupiter9099]

"Fifty Shades of Total Fucking Shit"

[@MegaMav101]

Fifty seconds of shit

[@somemysteriousguy7114]

+MegaMav101 more like 2 hours of shit

[@issacjones5440]

Fifty Shades of heaping garbage

[@AlexisSnyders]

Well if you're into that.

[@AlecGilmore]

- Chris Stuckmann, 2015 They need to fix the DVD cover immediately.

[@alternative_action]

The book is cheesy as hell.

[@ThierryRocksTV]

Isn't there a bit where he pulls out his dick and she shouts "holy cow!"

[@Rachel-96]

Demon Rantz Yes at the point I stopped reading the book, its a slap in the face to great authors

[@emilengen7825]

Demon Rantz what's your point??

[@madcircle7311]

What cheese

[@anaperez5442]

I found a copy in an used book store. Read the first 5 pages and nearly puked. When you have a heroine who's rolling her eyes every few paragraphs and whose dialogue is: OH, crap! Holy Crap! I mean nothing short of a flaming bag of dog 💩.

[@evancooper4968]

His reaction to the lip balm was HILARIOUS

[@Jackoosh1]

ayy lmao

[@evancooper4968]

Jak pls

[@Jackoosh1]

k

[@coltonray2078]

The Nic Cage clips made this review.

[@kevinkilbane2007]

Because its a shut review. Chris is a prick

[@nslater1388]

I just realized something. This...movie, if you want to call it that, and Jupiter Ascending, both have weak female leads with strong, dominate men doing pretty much everything for them. Now get this. BOTH of these were written by women(ish). There is a class of women who actually fantasize about having men overpower and rescue them all the time. This is a thing.

[@timekeeper2538]

That "class" of women is actually the vast majority.

[@BassbaitGG]

+N Slater what the hell is "women(ish)" supposed to mean?

[@nslater1388]

+TimeKeeper25 Tell that to all the other women praising characters like Furiosa because she is a strong character for not needing a man in her life.

[@stopmotionmaniac8237]

You forgot that they both have idiotic names...

[@sashaspiegel2733]

And Twilight too

[@tightlikeweed9735]

nic cage shoulda been in this movie

[@SharkAlien66]

The Nic Cage of the 90s and early 2000s maybe. Nic Cage now...

[@BrynjarReynisson]

+Harley Dirk It would have made it better.

[@lt0295]

Nic Cage makes every movie worth watching.

[@jakemitchell1132]

I just got a bad image of Nic Cage using a whip and now I'm disturbed.

[@fuckmeintheassandprankmesi7553]

Bill Cosby

[@Myvoetisseer]

Everyone bitching about the 'weak female' rant, but it's true! Why would I watch a sex scene if I feel the woman is not really into it? I wouldn't HAVE sex with a woman if I feel she's not into it. How would I relate to the main character when the main has no character? Never stands up for herself? I would just detach. Yes I know this was made for woman, but guess what! Chris is a MAN! And this is his review!

[@TheKeyser94]

You dont realize that Stuckman is married to a woman? And he have a mother? So dont come with that bullshit that he is a man, I think that he understand what is a very good movie not matter if for famales or for mens.

[@Myvoetisseer]

TheKeyser94 Wow, grammar dude. Also, yes I'm well aware of that, and? He judged the movie by itself and said it's a bad movie. But adds to why it's a bad movie, for the reasons I listed above. It's designed for women so they love it, by maybe for the wrong reasons. Men won't love it, because they don't connect with this sort of a character.

[@TheKeyser94]

Hugo Joubert If you really think that my grammar is bad now, imagine when I first began it was horrible. You dont only are generalizing, but you are insulting all the inteligent woman anywhere that hate this trash and see it as nothing more than PORN.

[@blackczer123]

TheKeyser94 I dont get why you two are fighting...all he said is that he agrees that their should be less twilight-like female roles?? Personally i dont see what wrong with that

[@vivianrfjblaw]

blackczer123 ikr its just his opinion

[@offic3rpatang153]

Your wish of strong females was granted by Rey and Furiousa

[@callumbrown5375]

Rey was such a great character

[@fabriziolorenzo2392]

Agreed.

[@offic3rpatang153]

Callum Brown best caracter of 2015 in my opinion cant way to see where she goes

[@hulkfan97]

+Avi Kid What about Rebeca Ferguson from Rogue Nation. Besides tom Cruise her Character kicked a whole lot of ass too. One of the strongest female roles of the year and don't forget it.

[@hulkfan97]

+Avi Kid Rebeca Ferguson was a kick ass female lead in Rogue Nation. She's one of the best parts of the movie. Her character was a total badass.

[@MrDirkAnger]

The relief on his face when he realized it was lip balm ... priceless. :-)

[@deadbars8755]

Good idea to tear those merchandises

[@orhungedik1983]

''Fifty Shades Of Total Fucking Shit'' im still laughing

[@baku5817]

Can't wait for YMS to rip this apart.

[@baku5817]

***** you never know.

[@hazardsigns]

I know he would have no reason to see it, but my fingers are crossed...the only problem is that this garbage lacks any sort of substance so the review would be really short. Unlike the awe inspiring 3 episode diatribe about After Earth, which collectively makes it into my top 5 KZbin videos of all time. Say what you will about that movie, but Will Smith was INVESTED, hiring all those 'experts' for ridiculous things like Future RunningTM, Future AccentTM etc ...no such time and effort went anywhere close to the production of 50 Shades

[@ellislamai]

I've seen the Schmoes and Chris rip this movie, your turn Jahns.

[@IMmephiles]

E Jones Then again the walking dead is lazy garbage too, and we got some great entertainment out of that.

[@hazardsigns]

De Pieter that's true. Though I still think more effort went in to TWD, at least initially, than has ever gone in to anything relayed to 50 Shades. This does not change the fact that I also really want him to shred what little of it there is into tiny tiny ribbons of rat crap :)

[@Timliu92]

Those Nic Cage clips from Bad Lieutenant: Port of Call New Orleans are GOLD.

[@battlion507]

Good News Everyone! 50 Shades of Grey "won" these razzies: Worst Picture 2015 Worst Actor 2015: Jamie Dornan Worst Actress 2015: Dakota Johnson Worst Screenplay 2015: 50 Shades of Grey (Kelly Marcel) Worst Screen Combo 2015: Jamie Dornan & Dakota Johnson

[@PhantomLantern2814]

It's an award winning film

[@bnaicole32]

I agree @Battlion 50

[@Alienhos]

The one thing I hate the most about books and movies in the lines of Twilight and 50 shades of grey, is that people are being influenced by these pieces of garbage. I know so many young adults(female) who are looking for their Edward or whatever, and actually BECOME the bad female characters you described here. Also, some people have injured(and killed!) themselves or their partner, while imitating badly described BDSM from the book....

[@mattiej2311]

Alienhos sounds like those women are weak themselves if they let a depiction of a fictional character influence their behavior.

[@TheHannahcast]

"What are you writers doing? Give some better roles to women!" * Mad Max: Fury Road & Star Wars: The Force Awakens comes out the same year* XD

[@whensomethingcriesagain]

+Christian Tyler Hannah Though in the latter case, my complaint becomes "give your female characters more character!"

[@thefilmwatcher1302]

Speaking for a larger demographic here, but your comment didn’t particularly age well in light of the more recent Star Wars sequels.

[@JLongbone]

I was with you until your "weak female character" rant. For one thing, why is it that no one rallies against weak *male* characters? I could point out one in particular in a movie similar to this. In The Notebook, Ryan Gosling's character falls in love with a girl for no reason other than the fact she's pretty, *he threatens to hurt himself* (emotionally manipulative behavior, btw) if she doesn't go out with him and later prostrates himself to her like a common lap dog. "I'll be whatever you want me to be," "You're dumb" "I can be that." And later on in the film his only character development past being in love with McAdams is him fighting in a war, which we never really see, and his father dying. From then on its just brooding over that same chick he can't get over. Why isn't he considered a weak *male character* or a weak character in general? The Notebook came out, people saw that scene and went "aww that's cute! what a grand romantic gesture! I wish someone would do that for me!" Then six years later, we get a movie where a girl attempts dangerous, life-threatening stunts just to see her ex-boyfriend. That movie was Twilight: New Moon And everyone jumped on it, saying "this is offensive to women/girls! this is toxic behavior! this is a weak female character! this is a bad influence for women/girls!" *Even though both scenes serve the same purpose for both characters, one is seen as "weak and offensive to women" while the other is "romantic, cute!* Explain this to me. Why is it when fictional female characters do anything other than shoot guns, act snarky, berate people, punch guys, they're considered weak? Why do weak male characters have the right to exist when these supposed "weak" female characters don't? Lets not forget Bella Swan (I can't believe i'm defending this character or Twilight in general. Grrr) risked her life on several occasions throughout all four movies to save others and yet she is *still* considered a "bad influence for women/girls" Don't get me wrong, her character is still garbage for *many* reasons, but i'll always be hesitant to call her "weak" I find it offensive that male characters are allowed to be weak (and its played off as either comedy or in this case cute and romantic) while female characters who are weak need to be banished off the face of the earth. Because our gender is obviously so flimsy we constantly need the same 1-dimensional, commonplace, sassy, bitchy, "I can topple 300lb men even though I have the body of a branch," characters to represent us. Anastasia's weak? Well, i'm sorry to say Chris, but you're dead wrong on this. Here's a list of things Anastasia did throughout the entire book series *SPOILERS AHEAD* - Stood up to Christian's rapist - Saved Christian's sister from a kidnapping single-handed, shot the kidnapper - Beat up a man who almost raped her - She knows self-defense - She owns a gun, knows how to use them - She was the boss of her own company by the end of the series - Was willing to leave Christian and become a single mother if he didn't accept her pregnancy Now, i'll give you a break considering you haven't read any of the books. Though, regardless, even if I didn't give you these examples, you would still be wrong. Anastasia is an intelligent, college graduate who knows exactly what career she wants to pursue and even if she wasn't with Christian, would've *still* gone on to do her own thing. But according to you, because she's a shy female who fell in love with a man, was curious (and horny) enough to try whatever he suggested, and wanted to be with him, that makes her weak? As a woman, and a person in general, this offends me. And things rarely ever offend me. When a male character is horny and curious and does whatever to be with the girl of his dreams, it's either played off as comedy or romance or "that's men for you! they always do stupid things for women! ha!" No one calls him weak or "offensive to the male gender" But then a woman does it and she's "weak," a "bad influence," "she makes all women look bad!" and my favorite "women need better representation than this!" Basically, all a female character's worth is tied up into how much she wants to be with a man and that my friend is sexist as all hell. This double standard has been pissing me off for the longest time and your rant brought it all to a head. I'm gonna leave you with a quote I love to give you some perspective "Screw writing “strong” women. Write interesting women. Write well-rounded women. Write complicated women. Write a woman who kicks ass, write a woman who cowers in a corner. Write a woman who’s desperate for a husband. Write a woman who doesn’t need a man. Write women who cry, women who rant, women who are shy, women who don’t take no shit, women who need validation and women who don’t care what anybody thinks. THEY ARE ALL OKAY, and all those things could exist in THE SAME WOMAN. Women shouldn’t be valued because we are strong, or kick-ass, but because we are people. So don’t focus on writing characters who are strong. Write characters who are people." -- Unknown

[@DoubleO88]

Thank you I hope Chris reads your post, it's even more powerful that this came from a woman as well.

[@JLongbone]

DoubleO88 I hope he reads it too. I'm tired of overly-"progressive" people. They end up sounding vastly more sexist and ignorant than what they're against. If the genders were reversed in this movie, there'd be no outrage over how "weak" the character is. I'm sick of this

[@DoubleO88]

Me too, it's the same with race as well, I'm a black man and I get just as pissed when SJW's clamour to make Johnny Storm black or for Miles Morales in the MCU instead of Peter Parker. And what's crazy is it's usually white people that want this more than the actual demographic they think they're helping out. It's so annoying and it feels like affirmative action.

[@JLongbone]

DoubleO88 Exactly! :)

[@HakoArm]

JLongbone The character isn't weak because she doesn't know how to fight. She is not weak physically. She is weak because she has no ambitions, no live before he meets this guy and he falls for him and he is now everything to her. Any idiot can hold a gun and shoot it, that doesn't make anyone strong. The Notebook was a stupid, cheese movie with stupid characters who do stupid shit noone would ever do. If you want strong both male and female characters you could watch Linklater's Before Trilogy. Both Jesse and Celine are grown up logical people who fall in love with each other and have ACTUAL problems and take logical decisions and comite mistakes like everyone else, they re people you can relate to and their dialogues aren't about how much they love each other or about their relationship, they're about everything and they're sooo interesting. They're characters you can relate to. This girl is just what (some) women want to be. Her live doesn't improve because she changes herself, her live improves because she meets a guy. And thats what most woman might think after this movie "Boy, I wish I had a guy that would turn my live upside down like Grey does."

[@LoveLikeWoe369]

yeah, anastasia is...meh, but christian grey.. good lord, he is easily one of the worst characters ever. i actually suffered through the first book (took me literally 6 months to finish because some of it was just so awful, i had to take a two month break), and i absolutely hate him! he's creepy and abusive and moody as hell. there were so many times in the book that he uses his "I was abused as a child" act to excuse his disgusting behavior and it's like ??? you were 4!!! i doubt you remember much, and even if you do, you're a grown ass man now. get your shit together. smh i just always see people complain about anastasia being weak, but honestly christian was the worst. even when she did try to get away from him, he shoved her into an alley, slammed her against the wall, and literally growled "you. are. mine." why anyone would find this series enjoyable is completely beyond me.

[@blazeticsboy]

Same here, I agree with everything you said.

[@Cha4k]

Awww, Waste of a shirt. Some 5 year old in china made that for you and you just tore it up.

[@RoyalDog214]

Cha4k Could have given it to homeless people or something.

[@nobel2920]

RoyalDog214 Even the homeless people wont accept that fifty shades of crap t-shirt

[@RoyalDog214]

NobeL Right because if you're homeless and have nothing else to wear, you would feel too proud to wear a t-shirt with one phrase.

[@anthonymessina8081]

RoyalDog214 Right because every homeless person wants a really thin t shirt in the middle of winter. im sure they'll be enthralled to receive that...

[@RoyalDog214]

Anthony Messina Right, I guess people should just end up destroying T-Shirt that they don't need or want then.

[@marikotrue3488]

I am catching up with older reviews and just came across this gem. Did not see the movie or read the "book" (note the quotation marks). I proudly state those facts in this venue. Showing that prize bag was a close 2nd in the hilarity scale. Obviously, clips of Mr. Cage take 1st place ;) Thank you Chris Stuckmann for going where no movie goer ever wants to go....

[@beccanicole7637]

I’m laughing so hard😂😂😂 “I thought this was something else”

[@joshmcdonald1510]

The Nic Cage laughing clips helped make this one of the best reviews on your channel lol 😂😂😂

[@alexiswilliams3095]

Really embarrassing that a woman wrote a book with a weak female character. Like she could of made the female chick strong but no.

[@whatsacowify]

The weak character is probably her just basing the character on herself. She does write Twilight fanfiction...

[@alexiswilliams3095]

The thing about fanfiction is that you control the story and can change the characters personality. I've some fanfiction that changes weak female.characters into strong characters.

[@SPL-6]

Why don't you run for dictatorship so you can mandate what people should and shouldn't like? Is being a strong woman who doesn't want to be dominated the only option now? I thought feminism was about choice, maybe I was wrong!

[@rogersgrafter8213]

SPL "It's people right to treat women like shit whenever and whomever they want to treat like shit because it's a choice"

[@SPL-6]

Baron Warden Nah, but it's your right to troll because of freedom of speech.

[@D.S.handle]

"Fifty Fucking Shades of Shit!" :D

[@Thegingerdrummer]

Lol

[@chickknightgreenleaf820]

let make this a hilarocity review. who with me?

[@dshvd2410]

Chickknight Greenleaf you forget. chris will have to rewatch it.

[@Ellievenn]

"But it's still rat shit." 😂😂😂

[@mi3helle707]

🤣

[@Krp006]

I laughed so damn much in the end..😂😂😂😂👏🏻

[@rhakeshg9406]

Laughed my ass off throughout this review😂😂

[@SergioKoolhaas]

Okay, since we hated Anastasia Steele for being a WEAK female character, here's my question to you, ladies and gentlemen. Who is your favorite STRONG female character in either a movie or videogame? Mine would be Mulan.

[@SpawnRevenge92]

+Sergio Koolhaas Ellen Ripley and Dolores Claiborne ex aequo.

[@mrboerger1620]

Samus aran before other m

[@fashizzlebadizzle6552]

The Bride.

[@SergioKoolhaas]

Fashizzle Badizzle from Kill Bill? Neat

[@umphreak9999]

+Sergio Koolhaas going deep for this one. Linda Fiorentino as Bridget Gregory in The Last Seduction. I saw that on HBO when I was like 15 and it still seems relatively fresh in my mind.

[@SkepticalChris]

5:06 . .. . priceless..........that expression..........absolutely priceless

[@MegaDragonslayer1997]

The Nick Cage clips had me dying. This whole review was hilarious!!!

[@grgmj1980]

Great review Chris, by the way.... You pissed off my daughter for the bad review. Keep up the good work.

[@jorafa6268]

That means he has done something right.

[@ellislamai]

Great parenting, mate!

[@henoch44]

Maybe his daughter is an adult?

[@beatboxbenton626]

Hey, your the one who clicked on the video, he gave his full honest opinion about the film so don't be all pissy with him

[@yeti112]

Dear Chris, your argument about weak female characters would have been something for the 70s. Ever since Alien we actually got strong female characters with a lot of development and interesting personalities other than just surving as princess Peach. It's good to continue writting such characters but not every single female character needs to be a strong personality, you can have weak ones, nothing wrong about it, just don't go back to the time were the only thing female characters did was to look pretty and crying for help. Keep it balanced between male and female characters, both can be strong, both can be weak. I know this doesn't change the fact this movie is crap and I'm not defending it. About the rest I mostly agree with your opinions, specially with your video about action movies.

[@isaacargesmith8217]

I think the main problem is the male to female ratio. I mean you never really see too many main lead submissive guys, well written or not, compared to female leads, like the horribly written main woman in this film or well written one in Tarzan. Same goes for strong female leads. More often it seems like the main action star of a big budget Hollywood movie is male than female. Sure there are great female leads that are very empowered but every Ellen Ripley there's a Rambo or Rocky.

[@malcolmalden]

His argument is not that there aren't any strong female characters, just too few in mainstream Hollywood.

[@mrhitisnumberone]

You missed the point. Just because female characters have improved since 1970 isn't implied here he is talking like the past five years with few good female characters. You took it way out of context bud.

[@yeti112]

mrhitisnumberone Sorry, I guess I missunderstoud. I also don't much experience with movies from the past 5 years, except from The Hunger Games which has a well written main lead.

[@isaacargesmith8217]

18807BB I would argue that the Laura Croft part has more to do with the fact that they're video game adaption movies. I mean Tomb Raider's not the only video game series with a bad movie tie in, just look at Mario, Resident Evil, Silent Hill, Street Fighter, Mortal Kombat, Wing Commander, and many others. And that's not including the bad T.V. show tie-ins. Don't get me STARTED on some of those train wrecks of television. What I don't get is why it's so hard for people who do try to write female characters. More often than not they're in a position story wise where they could just write the character and make it so that they just so happen to be female. As long as there's nothing gender specific about their character or the story there shouldn't be anything stopping the creators from switching their genders with ease. Heck, you could even go as far as also switch their love interest's gender too and if their gender doesn't affect the story or their character it shouldn't really be too hard either. You could even argue that what I said also applies to things such as race. I don't think any specific movie has to this though. There's also the fact that if everyone could write we probably would have more female leads than we do now, but most people can't write anything above bad fanfic levels of quality.

[@janetgray6220]

I'm just picturing the screaming faces of horrified fangirls if they saw that raffle prize being demolished. That's gonna keep me entertained for hours!

[@omnihealXIII]

gotta love Nicolas Cage

[@FrancoisDressler]

***** Those two are my favorite actors too

[@j.yossarian6852]

"Bruce Willis" "Actor" Pick one. He's long since cashed in.

[@abulzawabe3]

"I'M A VAMPIRE"

[@jasonchilado]

it's funny when Chris destroys everything in the package!

[@jasondicosmo9567]

I died laughing when he said Fifty Shades of total fucking shit 😂

[@lostchromatician1694]

same

[@gorrow1990]

Re-watching this fantastic review while waiting for Chris to upload his Fifty Shades Darker review. That gift bag part is still hilarious.

[@SickVidsNick]

The worst part about this movie is that it's gonna make all of it's money back. This is why we can't have nice things

[@meghanel-kadi6398]

She didn't just write Twilight fan fiction that made millions, she did it under the pen name Snowqueens Icedragon. Amazing.

[@britanniacreations]

Not gonna lie I kinda had the same reaction when he got the lip balm stuff

[@stefand6397]

A lot of people are bashing Chris for complaining that Ana is a weak female character, I think what really got him going is the fact that she's so similar to Bella that it literally is irritating as fuck, whether or not you like these books/film, it's true that Ana is basically Bella and they're both dog shit characters. Haters gonna hate.

[@haniputani]

I dont hate. What I do hate is this dogs shit of a movie though. Good review Chris

[@stefand6397]

haniputani Agreed !

[@mysteriousdyslexic5128]

Yes!

[@henrik6754]

A lot of my friends wants to go watch this movie instead of Kingsman this weekend because of all the sex scenes. That seems weird, right? A group of guys going to see this movie by themselves? I politely declined going with them.

[@InsideJacobsMind]

Please go see Kingsman

[@Maztuhmind]

Circle jerk ftw.

[@brasteen1]

Um they know the internet exists for that right?

[@AnimalStomper]

Your friends are not normal.

[@henrik6754]

Apparently it's to pick up chicks.

[@CyberLance26]

It feels to me like women are almost always supposed to be way better than the men at everything on most stuff nowadays so a few movies with women that are not supposed to be superior to the men feels very nice actually. There is a huge amount of girl power and feminism in the media nowadays and all female characters must be really strong both physically and mentally and they are not allowed to show any weaknesses or show a cute or more girly feminim side at all anymore. People really exaggerate the whole feminism and girl power stuff nowadays and makes it seem like all female characters must be cool badasses that does not need a man or anybody else to survive and she does not need any help at all from anybody. And it often feels like the women must be way better than the men at everything nowadays or else people will complain about it.

[@GiantButterKnife]

I believe this issue stems from the lack of major female rolls. When you have so few, every one becomes significant. The significance of each individual character can be diminish if there gets to be a number and variety of female rolls that rivals male rolls.

[@DownWithPlankers101]

Yeah I've been noticing that trend myself. It's a shame that some people think that any type of weakness in a female equals a 'bad' character. Or when a female has the audacity to turn towards a guy for help. I myself kind of see it as showing more of the characters human side, that they're not a complete badass robot, that never needs help from anyone, especially from a guy. And this is a girl saying this. :P

[@xScribbledDreaming]

portraying a woman who is emotionally, physically, economically and otherwise dependent on a man who abuses her is not good female representation, it's harmful and that's why people take an issue with it. women don't always have to be strong, gun-toting badasses, but they also don't have to be one-dimensional, weak characters like anastasia steele. and please don't act like we get so many strong female characters that it's actually something different to get a weak cardboard cutout of a woman like we do here. unfortunately, there are not that many interesting and three-dimensional female characters in hollywood yet, so we shouldn't accept weak shit like this.

[@knifeofdunwall]

Rubbish. Women are generally portrayed pretty badly in film - reduced to mere eye candy and insignificant roles. Also most films are led by men!

[@CyberLance26]

xScribbledDreaming I was thinking about the media in general and far from only this movie. Movies, TV shows, comics, cartoons and other stuff. They usually make the women way better than most of the men at everything.

[@renapeppers20]

This is one of the funniest reviews i've seen XD!

[@Olderaccount17]

4:21 gotta love it when Chris goes full Angry VideoGame Nerd

[@jeffbuckland1833]

Who came here after his review of Fifty Shades Freed?

[@jasonchilado]

Jeff Buckland me!

[@BryantBergemann]

You hit the nail on the head on why the actual bdsm community hates those books and movies! She doesn't want to be doing it and he just does whatever. It's the exact opposite of a real relationship.

[@vcabrera5396]

Your face at the lip balm was hilarious! 😂😂😂

[@SamLizS]

The movie was crap. The character that was presented to a person who has not read the book is that of a women who has little will or depth. Her character was lacking dimension or meaning. She just was blah. Chris is not saying Every Female Character has to be a badass. Just that they should have more depth to their character past the "I can't function with out a man" Routine . Chris watches a lot of movies and most movies type cast women into rolls of damsels in distress. You could see where after a while you would want to see a different character presented to you. Chris never once said that they don't make weak male characters. If you want an Idea of what I mean about a female character with depth and complexity look at Big Eyes, Not an action movie but still a complex female lead. en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Strong_female_character Just as a point of reference. Being a strong Character does not have to mean having to kick ass. Just has to mean well constructed, well thought out and well presented. You have to want to care about the person you are presented. If you don't have that then what do you have. A person who you watch for 90+minutes who at the end of the movie you don't care if they die.

[@MyTimelord11]

i love the fact that you really care about the fact that she was such a weak female character who needs a man! i completely agree that we need WAY more good female characters.

[@AaroNinjaJones195]

Can't wait for your kingsman review chris, I saw it last saturday and absolutely loved it.

[@J4CKM4N2266]

I cannot wait to see his review either.... oh, and also Jeremy's review (would be amazing if he uploaded his review tomorrow - he probably won't, but it would be awesome)

[@AaroNinjaJones195]

Jeremy's review was awesome, glad he loved it and yeah he really shouldn't have done Fifty Shades Of Grey first, fuck that movie and I haven't even seen it haha.

[@brunogonz86]

J4CKM4N2266 Jeremy's is already up!

[@johnnyboy513]

Sadly this 50 Shades of Grey is going overshadow it in the box office due to the controversy and media hype surrounding it.

[@2callofdutyman]

Johnny Boy like the interview?

[@davidjohnson6087]

Is that sonic on his shirt? Because I would love that.

[@Azulzinhokkk]

It's him! I wonder what Sonic games he plays.

[@exall6043]

David Johnson songeta sonic + vegeta

[@DonScarface]

"You writers need to make some good female characters!" Then out comes Mad Max with furiosa...

[@mattiej2311]

Umar Mardijono and women still tend to be the same.

[@sandpapersnail9615]

All these comments and not one about the movie but rather discussions about weak female characters. I guess the film is so bad people don't even want to talk about it.

[@Strawhat_Kal]

Yeah it is.

[@EvelynDayless]

Someone dared talk about women so naturally all the men have to come out of the woodwork and complain.

[@coastercritique]

I think it's safe to say that this is the worst movie of the year.

[@calidabrisadeverano]

Most people have a problem with the word "weak" in female leads. To me is simple: I don't care how weak, deppendant, stupid, smart, strong or whatever ANY character is as long as it's compelling and WELL WRITTEN. Please Hollywood, write me some female characters that I can buy, that I can believe they are like that for a reason, even if I identify with them or not. Not just characters that are a blank space the viewers can fill with their fantasies/personalities.

[@willdabeast8509]

“What the hell?...wait...oh, it’s LIP BALM! I thought it was something else.”

[@exnihilus1]

4:47 your reaction, I laughed so hard

[@mmmissmiss3356]

4:48 That disturbed look on your face and your "what the hell" had me laughing!!! :D I thought it was exactly what you thought to be as well until you opened it and it turned out to be lip balm hahahahah.

[@Lola-rn2jj]

The movie was absolutely horrible. I don't know what all the hype was about. It was boring, too long, and no interesting story line. Is Grey supposed to be some mysterious person who reveals himself slowly in the following movies? Is that what we're waiting for (to people who read the books)? If so, they have done a really crap job of keeping the audiences attention. I don't know if I want to even see the sequels. I literally had to force myself to watch the entire thing just to see if it was going to get better.

[@snakey973]

This review is dead on and I love you for it, thanks for exposing some very insidious rot- subbed!

[@DinaraTengri]

+snakey973 so cool to find you on a Stuckmann video :) I love your X-files videos.

[@snakey973]

+Daniella Olivaw hey! thankyou...He does awesome reviews!!

[@AshXXMayftw]

I get that people want strong women in movies and to an extent I agree, however I don't think depending on a male character is a negative. Even if they're strong they'll need support in some way shape or form. This kind of dependency however I do not. The kind I like to see are the ones like in Edge of Tomorrow where they learn and fight together and help each other out when they're in danger.

[@kitgames1174]

Depending on an abusive male character is a negative, and that's what we have here if Chris is any judge to go by.

[@isaacargesmith8217]

I think the main problem as a whole is the ratio of men to women characters, good and bad, when it comes to certain roles. I mean with submissive characters you generally do see women in those roles and with more dominant roles you do see more men in said roles, though nowadays woman are getting cast in those roles more often too. It's not really any movie's fault necessarily but more the industry.

[@AshXXMayftw]

Isaac Argesmith But my question is would it be wrong for a woman to depend on a man if she was in trouble or really needed someone's help?

[@isaacargesmith8217]

***** No, that's why I brought up Tarzan. The female lead in that Disney movie was a submissive character done very right. The problem I think isn't that women are in these submissive roles where they aren't the ones to take initiative, it's that there's an imbalance in the ratio between men vs women in these roles.

[@AshXXMayftw]

Isaac Argesmith Eh I guess. But my question is this. Is it wrong to have a strong woman character have to depend on a man due to her own faults? Like she does something stupid and get's capture and while she tries to escape he's out there trying to rescue her.

[@henryisthere]

I love his cheesy smile when Chris gets the poster and T shirt 👕🤣

[@BirdPeopleArentReal]

When I saw the lip balm I was like "oh shit" and I just heard Anastasia's voice in my head going "what are butt plugs?"

[@shawnfields266]

max ride If you have to ask, go find out for yourself!

[@BirdPeopleArentReal]

No, she said in the movie "what are butt plugs" lol

[@shawnfields266]

max ride No, i know that from watching Jeremy and Chris's reviews of this movie before. I was just joking. Sorry for not being clarifying that sooner. My bad, dude!

[@BirdPeopleArentReal]

Ha ha yeah I wasn't sure whether you were being sarcastic or not. I choose the answer that would make me look the least stupid to other people

[@shawnfields266]

max ride Well, good answer. I don't think you're stupid. I don't know you personally, so i can't confirm or deny, but so far, you seem okay. Have a great day/night, and as Caddy always says, remember to stay beautiful.

[@zombieboy3000]

Wow, It's depressing when you do a review and all the comments are all about your rant about "weak female characters", these shit heads just missed the point. Oh the humanity! Anyway always a great review Chris, keep it up.

[@Strawhat_Kal]

The movie fucking sucks.

[@gevoian]

red- x porn is 1000x better than this shit.

[@hemidas]

As soon as you mentioned "Twilight fanfiction", no further review was was required.

[@thequietknitter9107]

Come on, Chris! You got a free blindfold! My neighbors think I'm a loon for laughing so hard this early in the morning!

[@Valzahd]

Seriously? This was an altered Twilight fanfic? I was willing to just let 50 Shades be as something not for me and whatever. Now I'm actually pained the book got this much attention.

[@KaleLikesWaffles]

The soundtrack is decent at least

[@ivythetwisted6908]

If you want to watch this shit just torrent it. It's already awailable in full HD.

[@lilboi68168]

it's nt even worth the time watchin/downloading!!

[@StygianStyle]

Ivy The Twisted Now that's hate...lol

[@derekant1612]

It's not worth the storage space or the bandwidth

[@VNExperience]

Ivy The Twisted I did. I tried to watch it but gave up after 15-20 minutes. It really is _that bad_. I can't understand people who went to the cinema to see it.

[@GoldenCobraofficial]

Ivy The Twisted The movie sucked. I've seen it. It was a complete waste of my time.

[@supermanguy1214]

Chris this is one of the funniest videos you've ever made the parts with Nicolas Cage laughing are fucking epic LMAO

[@whatsittoya4959]

The use of Nick Cage in this review is flawless

[@SRFColonel]

We do need diversity but not FORCED diversity, I honestly hate it when a woman is made a strong badass just for the sake of diversity? Why is it when women act like men they are strong, empowered, and independent? Yet when men act like women we're weak, emotional and even gay. We should be celebrating the feminine and masculine traits, we are a sexually dimorphic species, changing that for the sake of diversity or political correctness is just plain stupid. Ex. Why not make movies about a woman who is smart, cunning, manipulative, who CAN handle say a gunfight, instead of a ridiculously over the top man-like woman who can just beat men to a pulp in a fist fight without any rhyme or reason? Forced diversity in movies, games, books, WHATEVER, is never the right way to go