Life lessons from my PAINFUL teen years (cringe)

Life lessons from my painful teenage years! Learn from my mistakes so you don't have to make them yourself.
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[@Staplegun]

Top r/hardcore moderator.

[@LilCigarillo]

Nah top r/hardcore G

[@s3lfFish]

My advice to my younger self would be : - Try to find a meaningful job that you like while doing your art cuz you don't come from a wealthy family, stick to your dream and with that steady job get yourself a flat or whatever you can afford to have a roof over your head. - Try to stick with that girl you like. - Get therapy cuz you went through hard shit and you need to sort it out before committing with someone. - Be careful with your health, you think you're invincible but you're not, do that swimming that you liked and do it as much as you can. - Family and friends are important. - Read a lot and when you can. - learn some new skills - help others, everyone's trying to figure it out. Find the people that will help you too and avoid toxic people and environment. - Also gently fight the system that creates these toxicity. create something good instead.

[@futuristic.handgun]

I love your list! Mine would be pretty similar. Hope you're doing well in life friend. 💓

[@s3lfFish]

​@@futuristic.handgun Thanks a lot :) I'm glad to hear it. Hope you're doing well too ! I hope some young(er) people will read these. It's simple advices, we've all heard it at some point of our lives, I remember hearing similar things but thinking I was above it and invincible. But sometimes simple doesn't mean its not true ;)

[@jrocmorgan1913]

When Uncle Finn says “Here’s the thing” you better listen 😂

[@hunterlawless6160]

One thing I’ve learned as an 18 year old is it’s not really good to strive for the job that is fun. You just have to accept as an adult that your job might not be fun and you just have to deal with it. That’s why I’m a masonry worker with my father’s company, it pays well and I get to work in the family, but man it’s not fun. But in a way that makes me appreciate life more because I work hard for what I get. In some ways I prefer having a job that I don’t exactly “enjoy”

[@FinnMckentyPRMBA]

Facts

[@worksofein6449]

Can confirm this is solid advice. I started following Finns advice in 2010 when i was at rock bottom. I turned my life around and now I'm stable and happy, and get to do the thing I love as my job.

[@raphaellee7273]

Thanks, Finn. I'm at that transitional phase of my life - it's tough seeing the light at the end of the tunnel sometimes but I know it can be done - and hearing you talk about your experiences really reinforced that

[@HashiTomi]

It's good to reflect on who we use to be. It really helps you appreciate where you ended up.

[@endcensorship874]

You don't know where you're going if you don't know where you've been.

[@rebekahcarter8120]

You are so right. We may not ALWAYS be able to do everything we set our minds to but we have to believe we can or otherwise we absolutely won't be able to achieve our goals. But a lot of people don't want to hear this bc it makes them feel bad about their own issues.

[@Rubysvideos]

From what you told us about your story, you didn't have the guidance needed at that age to get your shit toghether right away on your own. Its a blessing you were able to do it on your own at any age, some people live like teenagers well into their 40's and beyond because they never had anyone show them what a grown up is supposed to look like. Keep grinding, keep learning, keep growing. Thanks for your advice!

[@tryhardtrynot]

As a psychology major, I really appreciate you incorporating psychological principles in your videos 👏well done Finn

[@socoamarettojustine]

finn thank you for posting this. it's not easy to look back on our mistakes and talk about them. good on you man.

[@RiteanDan]

People talk about this a lot. I guess maybe I was lucky. My teens were my favourite times of my life and I never had to go through much cope. I’m about to be 56-years old and still feel like I’m 20. I know just younger people don’t get that, but I’m telling you it’s true. Aside from some “adult responsibilities”, nothing will much change from that time. I’d say the only things that might change for you is you might be open to more kinds of music, not just hardcore and metal (although still favs!), and health woes. I’m literally writing this right now from a hospital bed after a heart attack. This is the shit that really will make you aware of your real age. Peace people! Love ❤️

[@FinnMckentyPRMBA]

Best wishes for a speedy recovery!

[@Aliens11011]

This is so true jeez man I look like a dork to and then when i see a photo of myself I’m like oh my fucking gosh what the hell I am a dork

[@thebreakdownbarber]

Turbo virgin needs to be a band name asap

[@TannerMxer182]

I 100% subscribe to your mantra of believing in yourself and setting goals, like the make a list and don’t back down. I took this approach with a salary number when I switched from a business analyst in software development to a user experience design role. I got laid off and said, alright, 3 months to make the career switch and go after it. 2.5 months later, landed a six-figure job as a designer with verizon… and let me tell ya, those big names on a resume can CARRY your career.

[@FinnMckentyPRMBA]

Big names are worth a TON. Nice work!

[@Goodmorningyouall]

Great video. I regret sitting home alone all the time. Never had friends or fun at shows

[@RobertHastings12]

Man, I'm old enough to remember when you were "the internet's cool older brother" during the SYWH days. Now you're "the internet's father!" Time flies! Lol.

[@spfadden082711]

I think I would tell myself to settle down earlier. I always had a decent job but never really settled. Had my first child at 37. I didn’t know what I was missing. Wish I had her at 27.

[@The_Bass_Stunters]

I feel ya bro! Ran like a maniac all the way up to my mid 30s. Fortunately I got away from that particular friend group and reassessed my priorities been gravy ever since. Be careful who you surround yourself with.

[@lucaslouzada44]

Some people only wake up to the sad reality of life in their forties - most of them had too many plans, which they had no intention to carry out. Twenty five is pretty OK in comparison…

[@FatLikeKessel]

You’re the man Finn

[@kollinrose]

I like the advice tidbits Thank you Finn🔥

[@TheCivildecay]

I went to shows, smoked weed, and played WoW from the age 18 to 25... now i'm 41 and finally feel like I'm at the place where I should have been at age 31if I had a plan/goal in my life.

[@visualdarkness]

As a 35 year who is currently studying, and failing, with not that much to fall back on I agree.

[@Tyler-iq9zn]

Maybe it’s not about the stays at the halfway house that mattered most, but the substance dependencies we picked up along the way. 😮‍💨

[@TheAndostro]

well i'm 25 now and i wanna say my scientific background is better than job i have (ok it's in big company but low salary) and i sometimes wonder if it wasn't better if i focused on getting job expiriance since being 18 and study in weekend school but now it's to late i'm going strongly maybe one day i'll get what i work for

[@sollamander2206]

Working hard doesn't guarantee success, but not working hard guarantees failure.

[@koolklem7889]

Well, that was the 90's. You'd get the F-word if you had shorts over your knees.

[@juliancantdrum]

wow Charles Bronson thats some crazy stuff

[@Destroyer.no.XV.after-Rome]

I have no regrets. I could have had a better youth, without drug/alcohol abuse and without an unstable mother. However, with the butterfly effect, we don't know. I might already be dead today or be drunk right now (sober for several years and no need for pills) if not for the past experience and with the onset of madness in society from 2020. Sane people around me now on the medication Zoloft, Xanax 😂

[@cityshadeswoodworkin]

So I hung out with a lot of aging punks in the early 2010s and saw the good and bad of that scene. On one hand their shows were great, you could act outside the bounds a lot with slam dancing, mosh pits, throwing beer cans, etc. On the other hand the scene could be like a high school cafeteria with the alpha popular punks, wannabes and lovers. Many were very self conscious about what was and wasn't "punk" and acceptable in terms of style, behavior and what someone did for a living. There was a do it yourself ethos and also a kind of reluctance to live or work in any kind of way that seemed exploitative. I don't think this was necessarily a bad thing tho. I felt like skateboarding guys were sometimes the cool jocks, punks with desk jobs were normies and gutter/crust punks were the burnouts. It's not a bad scene and I think a lot of what they stand or stood for has become accepted and mainstream but it does have its own annoying gatekeepers and snobs, dirtbags, cool kids and losers, keeping up with jonesea and a lot of what misfits might think they are running away from.

[@cityshadeswoodworkin]

I had a discussion with a punk about it and he took an attitude like "yeah I get it" regarding the gatekeeping but it's also necessary because this is a scene for misfits and others who don't fit in mainstream society. He went on it's unfortunate but people in the scene have to police it somewhat to make sure d-bags or others who might be seen as undesirable don't dilute what it is. So in this way it starts to replicate the high school cafeteria and become self conscious and exhausting. It is what it is but I still had some of the best times of my life at punk shows

[@jrocmorgan1913]

Your neighborhood “Here’s the thing” addict here! 😂 where is it??

[@j____b______3171]

Another famous tier list?!.

[@Gemmyfire757]

Hey Finn, would you be interested in talking to Jimena Fosado? She was on Jared Dines' Musician Mansion, and she tours with all sorts of pop artists - she's currently on tour with Drake Bell. I have her contact info and EPK if you're interested

[@claythomas7506]

All dork jokes aside, that’s what the majority of white dudes looked/dressed like in the late 90’s. Myself included. People of all ages look back at their teenage years and cringe a little.

[@rockerpirate]

Finn the Powerviolence god!

[@Skylarlateef_guitar]

I’m 19 rn currently on foundation year access course to degree level marine biology but next year I am planning on switching to music performance and recording, I have been playing guitar for 11 years and went to music college, is this the right thing to do. Or should i stay with marine biology have it as a backup degree for when I then go down the route of working in the music industry.

[@FinnMckentyPRMBA]

Nooooo do not go to school for music!

[@HarryToeface]

The shame is relatable bro 😅

[@midnighttrain7844]

your wore eye glasses before？

[@jasonkeely7269]

Work ethic, knowing the right people (LinkedIn is great), practice talking to people (dont be afraid to put yourself out there) , I make almost 200k a year as a Project Manager and I literally just run my mouth for a living.

[@endcensorship874]

Be your own advocate, your own cheerleader. Others won't do it for you.

[@jasonkeely7269]

@@endcensorship874 completely agree, noone is going to do it for you and sprinkle in a little fake it til you make it

[@SportsMetalBizkit]

alternative video title: "How to: The american dream"

[@BurnYourFriends]

I started going to shows when I was 18. I got a job at 21, at a hospital and then started to go to shows. I was going to 20 shows at the time, I did get 6 increases at the time. I quit my job because we were moving to a trailer park, and I didn't think I would have a job. I got a new job at the amway grand plaza, at 27 and worked for a year, then the pandemic hit and closed down. Then I got a job at uchello's, and work there for 2 years, I did get a raise there. Then I got let go after 2 years, because it was too slow. I now have a job at cracker barrell and worked there for 3 months. I'm 33, and still live with my mom, but also by the end of the year I can get a apartment.

[@Contrabann_]

Finn Mommy

[@derrickblodgett5782]

I started cooking in a restaurant at 21, I stayed there for 13 years and people who used to work there would come in and ask me, “Why do you still work here?” In a pretty mocking manner. I bought my own restaurant the 1st of this year and now I’m taking those same people’s money and they’re now asking me “how did you do this?” I did it because I worked my @$$ off for 13 years, learned everything I could, and didn’t let there negative comments deter me from my goal.

[@spfadden082711]

You win in the end. This is like my best friend. He never moved out of his parents. We made fun of him relentlessly. However by 30 he had saved up 100k and bought a house. Meanwhile we were all still living in crappy apartments paycheck to paycheck. He was thinking ahead.. we were not. Sounds like you were too

[@tokeypokey]

Its a dead end industry. Put that same effort into almost anything else and make double or triple and work actual good hours

[@derrickblodgett5782]

@@tokeypokey you’re giving me the same “advice” I ignored. I get to make pizza, interact with my community, help the schools. I get to spend time with my family and coworkers. I get to see my daughters smile when she’s here helping and enjoying herself. My bills are paid and I get to set my own hours. Please tell me what you spend your days doing and accomplishing?

[@Greendayboy01]

Hell yeah bro tell him. Your dream is all that matters ​@@derrickblodgett5782

[@tsivils1987]

​@@derrickblodgett5782Plus, people will always need food. And as long as you're offering good food and making a good living, I don't see how it could ever be considered "dead end". Good job bro keep winning.

[@lyudmilstefanov1677]

I stumbled upon a dude I knew from punk shows back in 2007, and he roasted me because I was on my way to work drinking coffee early in the morning. He said to me, "So you've sold out to 'The Man' and you drink capitalist drinks" (while he was holding a Heineken bottle at 8 am). So yeah, the scene may hold you back in life a lot. I can relate to working jobs where people are 10 years younger than you or studying in university with those people. It definitely feels bad. So, respect for this video, Finn. A lot of young people from the scene need to hear this.

[@s3lfFish]

ok there are some caricatures, but there are some actual thoughts behind it (also no one is perfect and no one will ever be). but if he said :"don't work for this uber capitalist oppressive corporations that destroy the living and even the workers in a toxic environment, and try to find something you like that doesn't harm others and maybe even help others and makes you feel great." - I'd say its a legit careful thought. Its not holding back. I myself, tried to find a work that I would be proud of, I was helping create museums;, but then it wasn't paid enough, so I tried corporate shit, and destroyed my physical and mental health. Now I'm back on tracks and I try to avoid toxic environments, while also trying to stay conscious of what those clients are doing in the world. And sometimes if I can't do any other way, I do accept to work for evil companies cuz we all need to survive in this stupid oppressive world that could be way more gentle. But I'm trying to find the right balance and be mindful and I try to do my best. no one's perfect but I guess we are all trying to have meaningfull lives in the end and that's what it should be about.

[@endcensorship874]

#Respect. Come for the fun talk on music, stay for the life lessons we all need to hear.

[@carmendotnet6805]

That was truly cringe of him. Wow.

[@BudLightBeerOfStarCommand]

Punks and hardcore kids hate success, unless success means wallowing in your self-inflicted victimhood and pointing the finger at everyone but yourself

[@s3lfFish]

@@BudLightBeerOfStarCommand its funny, cuz here I thought that its the rich that use the word "self-inflicted victimhood" on wounds the rich creates on the poor. And of course a victim should never blame the agressor. Or else he or she will be blamed for being a "self-inflicted victim"

[@WavesNGames]

"It's only hopeless if you give up hope."

[@WavesNGames]

@@noisepollution6761 something that keeps my hope alive is another quote I heard once: "Everything will work out in the end. If it hasn't worked out, it's not the end." Keep working to be where you want.

[@wolfsguitarden740]

​@@WavesNGames...oh god..🤮...🤣

[@midnighttrain7844]

word

[@jasonfromguitarcenter]

⁠​⁠@@WavesNGames”If It Hasn’t Worked Out, It’s Not The End” Bills: “You Gon Learn Today”

[@noisepollution6761]

You can take the boy out of Seattle but you can't take the Seattle out of the boy 😂

[@LilCigarillo]

The 2 skater girls story better come up.

[@untitled568]

Spin the bottle diaorhea story better come up..

[@Danny.Smitty]

Farting is the ultimate rizz

[@PigglyWigglyDeluxe]

Also… respect your body. I’m a 32 year old mechanic and I love my job but god damn my knees hurt my back hurts my hands are scarred and scratched and scabbed up, my hearing sucks, I’m always tired and smell like fuel… If you’re gonna pick a physically demanding job, prepare your body for the abuse. I shouldn’t be in this much pain at my age.

[@endcensorship874]

That is great advice. You can get away with abusing your body when you're young. Someone told me a great saying: do stuff today that your future self will thank you for. Taking care of yourself is one of those things you can do today.

[@lyzzardking]

Is not about who says no, but about who says yes. That's some of the best advice I've heard in years.

[@davidgd55yt72]

Papa Finn dropping bangers lately

[@v00doozz82]

A tip that worked for me as well is to take pride in your job and give it your all even if it’s not something you plan on staying with. My only plan when I was in high school was to go into the military. I thought it’s what I wanted to do for life so I did the delayed entry and all, but after about a year of being in I realized this ain’t it lol. So I did my 4 and got out and was going to do accounting. Had a part time job at a grocery store while doing school and once covid hit decided to go full time to get some more money because classes were all online anyway. My boss at the time asked if I wanted to move up and decided “why not? I’m full time already anyway” and then just eventually decided to go up the chain at the grocery store instead of school and now I’m making six figures as a store manager. You never know what opportunities can arise so just give a shit at the job you do have. I’ve noticed just giving effort is appreciated A LOT in today’s job market when a ton of people give little to none.

[@endcensorship874]

That's a great story. Keep it up, my guy. Remember: You didn't come this far to just come this far.

[@Chill-mm4pn]

Thanks for serving. Fam said "this ain't it" 😂

[@greasybumpkin1661]

Yeah but keep encouraging others to quiet quit and annoy their bosses with socialist talking points, so that you continue to stand out as "one of the good ones" and get the promo 💪

[@v00doozz82]

@@greasybumpkin1661 if someone actually buys into that nonsense that’s on them

[@greasybumpkin1661]

@@v00doozz82 When I was a lil punk I believed I could get others woke to the big truths in life. I later realised that whether you're right or wrong it doesn't matter, people believe whatever they want to believe, why not just encourage them on whatever path they choose to be on.

[@jonsaxby7683]

While I absolutely get the whole "you can't just be a person who goes to gigs all your life and expect to be a success" idea I think their is also alot to be said for working out what your idea of success is as it doesn't have to just be earning alot of money, I know too many people who work in careers they absolutely hate because of how much it pays and while they might drive a nice car to work every day and be able to go on a couple of nice holidays a year they spend the majority of their time stressed and miserable so my advice would be to remember that it's ok to pursue a level of happiness rather than a salary target

[@EPICLIGIT]

Half a plan now is better than no plan when things hit the fan

[@JawncoreIL]

6:37 DUDE this hits home. Some of the guys I used to hang with would actually get mad when I’d talk about being excited to get to the workforce, starting creative endeavors, etc, so I gradually stopped hanging with them. Little did I know at the time these guys were battling their own demons and are now in therapy; which is what possessed them to react with such animosity. We don’t hang anymore; these days I want to surround myself with people who put themselves in life situations I want to be in, but it feels good to at least understand now why they were that way, and that I wasn’t just going crazy thinking these guys were supposed to have my best interest in mind.

[@FIDEL_CASHFLOW_]

Something my dad used to tell me was " usually you need to get a little bit lucky to be successful, but luck is just the word for when hard work meets opportunity".

[@jonathanw1106]

Also, luck favors the prepared. The harder you work the more likely you are to be in a position to get some of that luck. (Within reason of course, working super hard at digging drainage ditches is not going to magically gift you an executive position, you do need to be realistic and strategic about where you put your effort)

[@evelynnveleni]

Damn im goin to get that as a tramp stamp. Amen.

[@jonathanw1106]

@@evelynnveleni gonna be tramp postcard

[@TomBaddley]

Almost 60 years and multiple careers under my belt and let me tell you, this is super solid advice right here! I could have used this pep talk when I was 18. I hope the next generation is listening. Excellent video, Finn!

[@joesmith8725]

No. You werent a dork. lol That was the typical '90s/'00s style! Lot of us dressed like that back then at shows. lol

[@vin_fm2354]

Hardcore girls today go crazy for that guy in the photo

[@dakotakoll-is3rg]

I'm 34, been a line cook and been playing in bands/playing open mics my entire adult life. I want more in life but I've been coasting for so long that i don't know how to do it. Don't waste your time y'all

[@rebd00mer93]

Same. Whenever I was asked what I wanted to be when I grow up, I could never think of an answer. I'm 35 and I STILL couldn't answer that. It sucks because I can't figure out what I would excel at and the things I'm interested in wouldn't equal a job and the things that I WOULD be good at I can't do because I have a felony for drug possession 17 years ago.

[@ddanford1]

You’re ‘locus of control’ take is pretty refreshing. People tend to take that to one of the extremes. A lot of people spend their whole lives being down and out because of the situations out of their control, while others rant about how “EVERYTHING THAT HAPPENS TO YOU IS A RESULT OF YOUR OWN ACTIONS” which is just fundamentally not true. Ultimately, there are plenty of things that are out of your control but you will be significantly happier and more fulfilled if you focus on what is within your control.

[@Itsjustc]

“Grant me the power to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.” I am not religious in the slightest, but that prayer has done a lot for me and it’s right on the fucking money.

[@endcensorship874]

The thing is, the concept dates back to the Greek and Roman Stoics of old. Another concept I rely from the Stoics is this: *You are only in control of two things; your attitude and your effort*. That's it. You can't control people, their emotions or their actions. Don't even try. Also, *you can't control what happens to you but you can control how you respond to what happens to you.*

[@abelkeinz7028]

Last year in bus there were three teens. One guy and two girls, probably 16-17 years old. They were sitting on front of me talking about typical highschool stuff. Than he started to talk about how awesome is song Goorgio by Moroder - Daft Punk. “Yeah its cool. I ll send you that tune”. 10 minutes after he again : “that song is cool you should check it out”. Amazing song etcetcetc. I shaked my head thinking “Bro you are about to enter very dark corners of life. You dont want to go there”. Reminded on me during teen days. I talked once on my way back to home after school with girl from my class about Beastie Boys. How cool they are and stuff like that. She was very polite and at same time she didnt give zero fuck about my music knowledge. I guess being that music-know-it- all guy was just my way of trying to be cool and be accepted in society. Truth is that nobody gives a shit about what kind of music you listen. So if someone younger is reading: dont become that annoying music geek. You only became subject of laughing and people will label you as weird one.

[@FinnMckentyPRMBA]

“Music knowitall” is one of the absolute worst people you could be

[@abelkeinz7028]

@@FinnMckentyPRMBA there is video even Henry Rollins is talking about this “if you ask girl high fidelity stuff top 5 movies, books, bands - you are not going to laid”. Signs of deep insecurities that anyone can sense.

[@JawncoreIL]

“You are who you hang out with.” quote from my Dad. Reigns true especially as I get older.

[@TheMushroomTrap]

You are not somebody else.

[@rebd00mer93]

My dad said the same thing. He also had another saying that "Nothing good happens after Midnight." Which means normal people are at home sleeping. Only people getting into trouble are out and about after midnight which is 100% true.

[@brandonhilby7027]

You and I have a lot in common. I went to school at 25 and now I'm in my 40s and doing well. I was always in bands and crashed on floors and whatever. One thing I would add is that being confident enough to get on a stage in front of people and play original music, to book shows, to book tours, design merch, make zines, record music, etc. These are all amazing skills that easily transfer to the work and academic world and people that are playing shows to 25 people on Friday nights actually have solid skills that will impress people if they are willing to get out of their comfort zone a bit and hang out with "normies."

[@whatistau]

20-30 years ago many of aspirations and dreams felt so out of reach. Most adults didnt help either, by dicouraging to take on a creative career paths. My parents basically told me: do what you like, just be good at it and i went to art school. But back then it was lonely path so many mistakes were made. Today you have a blueprint to anything in your hands, posibilities are limited only to your discipline really.

[@FinnMckentyPRMBA]

Last sentence is the truth!

[@peaches65835]

When 18 to 22 I happily balanced Uni and going to shows. The best shows in our area were at the Uni bar anyway. I now have great memories and a degree. I recommend making sure your homework and assignments are finished, printed and in your backpack before you head out to the show.

[@kalebseiler8577]

Just curious were there many other kids at your Uni that were also into punk and alternative music?

[@johanericsson7309]

I don't know how going to shows would counteract doing well at uni, unless you're out drinking every night. If you're passing all your courses and taking care of your physical and mental health, you definitely have time for at least a show each week, let alone a show each month (which is usually where I end up).

[@Chill-mm4pn]

In my 20s I was working and being a Dad, relationship didn't work out but I've always been tight with my son since he made his appearance during my ex gfs c section. College dropout, happily married, got a house, decent 9to5 actually making good money but I remember being practically homeless just staying with a friend while trying to join the military years ago. Advice to my younger self: don't go to college, just work and get used to being independent and paying bills, also don't feel pressured to just go to school. Research that for profit college.

[@mircobiscioni3740]

I like every single video of you, but these "let me help you help you" - videos are just THE BESt thing ever! Thank you for these words, they let me know I'm still on the right path out of my long-lived misery from the past. Cheers and thanks, papa finn ❤

[@TheKalaxis]

If only there had of been someone dropping these truth bombs on me 20 years ago 😔

[@endcensorship874]

There's a saying: "The best time to plant a cherry tree is 20 years ago. The second best time is today." You got the information now, use it to improve yourself. It's gonna be rough, but you can do it. Remember ... *the difficult we do immediately, the impossible takes a little longer.*

[@blueshattrick]

This may come across as Boomer advice, but absolutely NOTHING wrong w/ being a nerd or a dork, Fin.. most people feel that way at some point! As you get older you realize what *really* matters is how you treat people (including yourself)

[@Frederick0220]

One more comment here. The brute force mentality is so key and really resonates with me, esp being someone in tech sales who literally does hundreds of cold calls a week. Also, I think this brute force mentality can be applied to dating. Sadly, with the advent of online dating and social media, socializing in real life and confidence are at an all-time low. Celibacy among Gen Z has skyrocketed. However, one can still cold approach women (in a tasteful manner) to get dates that they otherwise wouldn’t get. It really brightens a woman’s day. I’ve gotten hundreds of dates and even girlfriends this way. Some find it weird but it’s literally what our fathers did to meet our moms. There is no greater skill than having the confidence to politely cold approach a woman. OK, I know. Totally off topic. But it’s what came to mind when Finn mentioned having a high action brute force mentality.

[@muenchhausenmusic]

Funnily enough all this going to hardcore shows in a way could be described as college for your KZbin success. The whole hardcore and punk and alternative stuff is the foundation for your content. Not like this would be an example to follow bc few people could probably replicate what you did. But still, in a way, your wasted Ohio years maybe weren't so wasted after all? Same for the making zines, which you probably benefitted from during your graphic design years. At least you did something, got proactive with that passion. Not everybody does that!

[@FinnMckentyPRMBA]

I made it work, but it was a waaaaay harder path than just choosing the conventional path

[@FLINTmitten810]

I’m 34 and just now pulling it together within the last 2-3 years… it’s hard to do, but no giving up!

[@olivevideogames]

Finn, you look like you left your wife and two small children at home to attend that show in 1997

[@MilitantMe]

These are always my favorite videos. The advice is always appreciated.

[@johnkotchkowski7966]

I’m turning 28 in May with $1000 in my bank account as I’m watching this and saying “Maybe I could have $3000 in the bank at 34, and only want to die then as much as I already do now, maybe there’s ’hope’ for me too! :D”

[@MrSpeoples1]

Here's the thing...the 20's are a pivotal decade. Choose your trade. If a tool belt is in the picture, get on it in the 20's. If college is an option, take it. Bedframes, marriage and kids are not for everyone, if you don't feel it, don't do it. Your life will be about making others, mostly in their 50's, happy so choose the life that best reps your expectations for it. In your 20's it's about proving dependability before anything else so deal with it, 30's and 40's it'll be about the sacrifice. If what you consistently do, for whatever reasoning, is above the jobs expectations and the 50's... well, they are a mix of still can do but for other, now more important areas in your life. Some, a life full of family or bed frames and others, the higher quality of boobs and beer only responsible choices of your 20's can make happen.

[@jdcastellanosk]

Nah man. I went to shows, was in college, had a job, collected vinyl and tapes and had girlfriends. You can do it all

[@86thrasher]

Im not from the Punk scene but I’m from the metal scene which has a similar mentality mentality to what you described. I remember seeing a picture of Wagner from the Brazilian black metal band Sarcafago on social media and there was a lot of laugh reactions because it was a picture him in a suit and tie with short hair because apparently he’s now a college professor. I’m thinking to myself “What’s funny? Is it because it’s not “metal!” that he chose to better himself?”. I’m someone who spent his 20’s screwing around by going to metal shows, and trying to have a band. But then again even during my 20’s I was proactively thinking about what I wanted to do with my life, went back to college at 29 going to be 34 at the end of April and should be getting my bachelors in December this year. I’m in the Liberal Arts field which I know is tough area to land a career in but I’m confident enough to know that I’m just going to be fine since I’m actually working in my field of study. Honestly, I’m kind glad I went to college “late” because from what I’ve noticed is that a lot people who conformed to the idea that you have to go to college right out of high school ended up in careers they hate, or they get their degree and don’t get a career because they ended up not liking the career path that they took so they’re in debt for nothing and still working their server/bartender job. So again, I’m glad I went to school “late”because I avoided that pitfall a lot of my peers fell into.

[@9502937]

Good advice. I also learned this the hard way. Dropped out after a quarter of college and went back when I was 22 after looking around at the 30-year-old dudes at the same shows and bars as me and realizing I didn’t want to be them when I was 30. I’m now a junior associate at a law firm where my colleagues the same age as me are partners almost ten years into their careers. I will say, though, I am probably a more kind and humble person than I might otherwise have been…

[@TaxinGigs]

14:21 - 14:31 This in my opinion is the best advice. Surround yourself with positive people.

[@thomasanthony5021]

Blah blah blah life advice blah blah blah… I’m just here for the screamo.

[@slingster]

Not everyone can live like Motorhead. Worth a try though.

[@btothep1589]

The toughest thing for me is that feeling of being a fake corporate shill. I still struggle with it and I've been gaming the system for 30 years.

[@adamperez254]

I got in the medical field. Materials Management OR supplies. Moved up from there. Went to Texas A&M and hated it. 2001 to 2002. College is not for everyone. I went to shows constantly. Still do. I have been at my hospital 20 years. Have a great retirement. My wife works at the same hospital. Is a Senior Administrative Manager. Has her MBA. Just push yourself.

[@jaymesgrundmann1545]

My whole 20’s was an endless cycle of self destructive, druggy, criminal bullshit followed by wallowing in shame, envy and self pity. Things only changed when I broke the trauma cycle and sought gratitude,regardless of how shit things were…Now I’m happily married with a 2nd kid on the way. The most empowering thing you can do is accept that you aren’t a victim and nobody owes you shit.

[@rinehardt6837]

Finn I am 55 and I admire what you're trying to do with this video seriously. But it's also one of the hardest things to get people to understand until they've walked down that road. My grandmother left me like $12,000 when she passed away in 1987 could use that money to buy really nice car but no I got an old beater and use the other $8000 to buy clothes and shoes and go to concerts. Thank God I wise up and meeting my wife and getting married helped. But when I talk to my 13-year-old granddaughter today and try to tell her to get good grades be smart go to college yet a career she gives me that looked like this old man doesn't know what he's talking about. 😅😅😅

[@endcensorship874]

Keep telling her, she's gonna realize at a point your advice was real. My son, at 13, was arrested twice and had the worst friend group. Now? College grad, great job doing computer security. But, me thinks you know this since you're a granpa...

[@endcensorship874]

George Bernard Shaw: “Youth is the most precious thing in life; it is too bad it has to be wasted on young folks.”.@dutchplanderlinde8883

[@Aircooledcorey]

Love these videos Finn does. I grew up without a dad and had to figure it out on my own. I coach my kids sports team, I’m a scout leader, etc and the amount of kids with no positive role models in life is so bizarre. Gotta keep pushing through. Also, let’s go Braves! WS bound

[@rinehardt6837]

@@endcensorship874 Awesome

[@endcensorship874]

Great comment... except for the Braves part. Mostly because I could care less about Baseball. Look, my mom and dad were abusive and I could not wait to get out of the house. But I don't dwell on my trauma, I sought healing. I wanted to be a better dad for my kids than my dad was for me, I wanted to break an abusive cycle my dad passed on down to me. And I think I did a good job with that. We all need people to guide us thru this journey, ain't no one getting thru this on his or her own natural ability. That's not how it works.@@Aircooledcorey

[@Bigpapahaze]

Hey papa fin, how's your day going?

[@volkatz96]

I would also add : focus on one thing at a time whether it's a career you want to pursue or a new hobbie. You can't learn and do every job at the same time, like you can't train and play all sports at the same time. Pick one thing and stick to it, even if it means putting some things you are interested in aside for a moment.

[@FinnMckentyPRMBA]

Yes! Focus is everything. One thing at a time

[@kylevetsch4181]

Truest advice. Don't be like me; 33 years old who spent all their time trying to level up to 100 in Diablo 2 and being a pretentious music snob. Not a single person I've met over the years has given one shit about what screamo black metal shoegaze artist I find the best. They care about if I'm honest, motivated, and okay. Hobbies can be great, but don't make them the only thing you have in life or your thirties and beyond is going to be rough as fuck and you're going to end up depressed every day wondering how you're going to get out of the quicksand.

[@xxtradubz]

One vid you got your ish together @ 25. One vid you said you were a drunk and a loser in your 30s. What’s your story dude?

[@FinnMckentyPRMBA]

Career and personal life are different things

[@Henry14arsenal2007]

Dude you looked dope and up to par with the style of those days, theres nothing to worry about that.

[@ryansharp4691]

YOU HAD A BABY?!?! THATS FUCKING MIRACULOUS!!!!

[@evilandproud]

These stories are interesting. I'm almost 40, and after 3 different career paths I still don't know what THE PLAN is... I just keep moving😂

[@bruceismyhero]

Hatebreed song lyrics

[@rabiesgirl101]

I’m starting my career as a makeup artist and the actual start is so tough. This gave me hope tho thanks :)

[@endcensorship874]

If it was easy, everyone would do it. The Navy SEALS say to *Embrace the Suck.* So, embrace the challenge because the reward is worth it. Also, we all need to "choose our pain." Is it the pain of learning what's new, or will it be the pain of regret that you didn't do it? I know which one will hurt more in the long run.

[@Frederick0220]

Finn, love this content! I know it's not totally music-related but it's great hearing life advice like this

[@oldsmobilethompson1658]

Wait. Ok. There was a band called Charles Bronson?

[@ProductionsFromBeyon]

I still don’t have a bed frame and a dresser and I’m in my 30s lol

[@CompleteProducer84]

I didn’t acquire a bed frame until I was 35. And the only reason I got one is because I helped a family move something (took a half hour). In exchange they gave me a nearly brand new Queen sized bed. Still would only have a mattress if that didn’t happen, just turned 40😅

[@MetalGildarts]

Me, who is almost 31 and binges 4 hrs of music daily waiting to go to 7 shows and working a meager job at a grocery store….😢😢

[@LiveSilence3]

You are The Pope Of rockers/metalheads/alternative people! We Will listen to Your lessons! 😊 Everyone goes through shit! I went through Serious addiction And i am Now Turning things around For The better. And so Can Everyone! It takes Hard work but we Will all Get There 👍