Firas Zahabi is WRONG

[@FreestyleMartialArtist]

I just can’t imagine the cognitive dissonance it takes to be a jiu jitsu coach, understand it’s effectiveness, particularly for a smaller person versus a bigger person…and then not believing women should roll with men.

[@MenkIsAMubtadiiDeobandi]

brother it has to do with preventing unecessary contact, as it leads to immoralities. In Islam a man must marry a woman for that, as he has to provide and talk with her father and pay a dowry, which can be whatever she wants. The alternative as you can see is shameful men deceiving women and using them as tools. I hope you understand this perspective.

[@langying]

Or, it's because they sexualize every little thing involving women

[@FreestyleMartialArtist]

@@MenkIsAMubtadiiDeobandi I understand it. Doesn’t mean I agree with it, particularly when you’re someone with as large a platform as Firas.

[@metrolinamartialarts]

Cognitive dissonance is the perfect word for this.

[@MenkIsAMubtadiiDeobandi]

@@FreestyleMartialArtist There is no compulsion in Islam, so no one can force others. Thank you for your understanding

[@KnightJiuJitsu]

I think Firas is on to something...Because I never forbid Anya from training with other dudes, now she knows that there are guys better at Jiu-Jitsu than I am...I messed up.

[@metrolinamartialarts]

🤣🤣🤣

[@TheVeganeater]

His traditions revolving around primitive peoples mythology keeps him locked into the mentality that his wife can touch other men.

[@christophervelez1561]

Proof that you can be a good coach and not good in other things.

[@metrolinamartialarts]

Agreed!!

[@martinmadsen7955]

Eddie Bravo proved a while ago that you can be extremely good at Jiu Jitsu while literally having no brain.

[@metrolinamartialarts]

@@martinmadsen7955 no brain only conspiracies

[@christophervelez1561]

@@metrolinamartialarts LOOK INTO IT BRO!

[@Broken_Orbital]

"how ridiculous? you see your wife/girlfriend as a human and allow her to train with other male humans?" I think it shows true cowardice and insecurity if you can't trust your significant other around other people or other people around your significant other.

[@metrolinamartialarts]

This. 100% this.

[@hibernopithecus7500]

Exactly

[@moonknight4053]

Is that why he’s saying that or is it cuz a guy should be training with a man? Or because he thinks the wife will fall for the other guy?

[@Broken_Orbital]

@@moonknight4053 either one sounds pretty insecure.. If you're a capable human, you should be able to train with someone of the opposite gender, or just a lesser experienced partner, and aid in their progress rather than just seeing it as a ridiculous endeavor.

[@darkhorse75be]

Tom Brady has entered the chat 😉

[@davidyoung745]

You were respectful, while firmly stating why you think it’s important to have a welcoming space for everyone who wants to train to do so. Couldn’t agree with you more! And as an Ohio boy watching from Hokkaido Japan I was VERY pleasantly surprised to hear such good Japanese coming from such an unexpected source. Onihongo ga totemo jouzu desu ne! Bikurishita! Zehi, ganbatte kudasai!

[@metrolinamartialarts]

ありがとー‼️ご覧にいただいてありがとうございます！ It's a delicate line - I tried my best.

[@metrolinamartialarts]

@Nick Roy Fit I was respectful when it comes to his religion but not towards his view of the zeitgeist of Jiu-jitsu. Wrong again bud.

[@reyleal1509]

Imagine thinking BJJ is a life-changing sport that gives you confidence and makes you resilient - and could even help you survive an attack from a larger opponent - but then keep your family, the people you care for and love the most, from practicing it.

[@metrolinamartialarts]

Wild disassociation

[@mikhailvasiliev6275]

This one needs more likes. Here.

[@FranzStFleur]

I love the way Coach Zahabi coaches. But his opinion on rolling doesn't matter to me as it comes from his belief system. To me, his beliefs (and their contemporary religions are myths and fantasies from old comic books from a time we as humans didn't know better.

[@metrolinamartialarts]

Definitely!!

[@aswad7368]

You guys are so enlightened and have discovered life's mystery and truth! Great for you I hope that I can reach your level of enlightenment one day!

[@okarowarrior]

@@aswad7368 u welcome

[@someguy2249]

​@@aswad7368 it's really not that enlightened to see religious beliefs as fantasies, and it's good to call them that, especially when they are harmful.

[@Static_artist90]

Learning to defend yourself when someone is mounting you or between your legs is an essential tool for women as there’s a very serious traumatic event that fits that scenario. It’s also crucial for women to train with bigger stronger men in a safe environment. I know ladies who may not overpower a man but through technique and using their physical attributes to their advantage (relatively longer legs than a men equal in height) can routinely sweep and submit larger men

[@metrolinamartialarts]

Exactly!! That's my point 100% we'll said

[@BlackMartialArtsSociety]

But she can do with her husband

[@BlackMartialArtsSociety]

Also Guns exist and are way more effective

[@Ventus_the_Heathen]

@@BlackMartialArtsSociety what if she's gay, what if she's single, what if she's a teenager, what if it ends up being her husband that is the attempted abuser. People need to learn to defend themselves BEFORE getting attacked not by waiting until their married.

[@hibernopithecus7500]

@@BlackMartialArtsSociety What if her husband is the one she needs to defend herself from? I mean, let’s be honest here, there are some cultures who honestly believe it’s the wife’s job to provide for her husband’s sexual needs, whether she’s willing or not.

[@jeff2545mp]

You have been the most mellow youtube martial artist that I have come across, which is why you blowing your stack a little bit was both amusing and impactful.

[@metrolinamartialarts]

Thanks - I am pretty passionate about this. So, I'm glad it was conveyed the right way.

[@andrewanastasovski1609]

He's afraid of women and homosexuals? This Zahabi sounds like the real coward. So weak.

[@metrolinamartialarts]

He's definitely projecting something

[@maxhensley1685]

Honestly, I think Zahabi isn't just wrong, he's the one who's being cowardly here. To be afraid to let your partner roll with members of the opposite sex, because you're afraid they'll be tempted, or they're somehow losing value by being touched by someone else, is a mark of insecurity. Everyone has their own insecurities to grapple with, but to be convinced that this prospect is so scary that you can't accept other men could legitimately be comfortable with it, that strikes me as cowardly.

[@metrolinamartialarts]

You got it.

[@ronmka8931]

these insecurities are well justified since that's how many affairs start

[@cahallo5964]

You want your woman to be touched by someone else? Lmao

[@maxhensley1685]

@@ronmka8931 Affairs start in all sorts of ways, but you could prevent them pretty decisively by keeping your partner locked in a basement. But preventing affairs by controlling your partner and isolating them from anyone who might tempt them away from you seems pretty clearly cowardly when compared to not controlling your partner and being an appealing enough partner that they're not tempted. If you don't trust your partner with that sort of freedom, it suggests you either think very little of them (you don't trust their honesty or restraint,) or very little of yourself (you know your partner could do better, and will realize that by associating with other people.) But being that controlling isn't a great quality in a partner; most women could do better than a man who treats them like that.

[@ronmka8931]

@@maxhensley1685 seems like you are straw-manning here, never said this was how societies should be run nor did this actually happen (with some rare exceptions of course). and with the issue of affairs, again its not 'cowardly' to fear your wife may be unfaithful because if these fears came out to be true then the entire family crumble, and families had to be cohesive for a successful society which was why it was punished by death in almost all cases. an affair can start simply off of emotions, as it usually happens during a downtime of marriage (and marriage isn't supposed to be 100% happy there will be times were there will be at least some form of anger) and the woman (or man) may decide to have an affair with someone they see as more attractive (love is a very powerful emotion) that they would often see and be 'friends' with. now you may say love is more important than a built-up family with many kids and frankly in my opinion, divorce is selfish because they absolutely ruin the lives of the children for their own self-interest. now back to the point, had the woman or man (though with a man its harder to get caught because no pregnancy) not formed any relationship no matter how non-sexual it is, there wouldve been a stronger family, and the fact that married people are often a target for people to hook up with especially with men as women would see it as something 'unobtainable' which is why some pickup-artists (god i hate that word) wear fake wedding rings.

[@lupin9548]

"How dare you let your wife get on the mat and roll with another man ?" Well because in addition to what Ed explained and what some very true comments pointed out, dear sir, you DO NOT get to decide what your wife can or can't do as a hobby.

[@metrolinamartialarts]

Exactly

[@ishrakalvi4446]

@lupin9548 thats why guys like you gets cheated 😂

[@ragnarbirgisson394]

I agree with your general line of argument, but you stop short of calling Zahabi out by implying that it's okay for him to oppress his own wife and children cus it's his house. Or it's okay for him to preach misogynistic values as long as it's inside "his community"? I know you're just trying not to stir things up too much, but let's not forget that women are people too.

[@metrolinamartialarts]

Yeah I wanted to not call out the religion as a whole - but also practice what I preach with not wanting people to tell me what to do "in my house". So yeah I stopped short on purpose.

[@ToxicCatMC]

Look i don’t think letting your wife train is a “disgrace” like he says but to pretend like you can’t see where he’s coming from makes you actually look just as if not more ignorant, when you’re in a relationship it’s probably not a good idea to put yourself in situations where temptation could take you over, if you think this makes me insecure you’ve probably been cheated on in almost every relationship you’ve been in. It’s especially bad in bjj there’s literally a stereotype for coaches falling inside the the new girl when they walk in. A good equivalent would be if the man in a relationship was training beach wrestling with 20 women every day, I would seriously doubt that that his partner would be 100% okay with that

[@metrolinamartialarts]

Strawman argument

[@ToxicCatMC]

@@metrolinamartialarts elaborate then, the analogy at the end was to demonstrate what the proportionate amount of temptation would be on the male end, let me ask you a hypothetical, if your wife was training with ufc champions every day, and if shes good looking they’ll be hitting on her, do you honestly have THAT much faith in your partner, especially when hypergamy is literally proven to be apart of evolution

[@metrolinamartialarts]

@@ToxicCatMC yup

[@ToxicCatMC]

@@metrolinamartialarts ok bro 😂😂😂

[@metrolinamartialarts]

@@ToxicCatMC bro. As someone who currently trains in the same room as ufc athletes, I'm not worried. 😅 Just because you're projecting insecurities onto me don't make them a reality.

[@uktenatsila9168]

I remember a dude whose kid (like himself) had troubles in school and on the street. I had offered to have the kid come in and train. After a few times offering the opportunity, the father exclaimed "I don't want him to be able to beat me in a fight". I told him that was a weak ass excuse and that he was chicken shit! This dude you are calling out is fragile mentally and emotionally. Thank you for the video.

[@ghengiskhan9308]

Firss is Muslim he has to find anyway to justify his beliefs

[@rjj54321]

unfortunately it has everything to do with islam.

[@lady_draguliana784]

this post is TL:DR... I'm sure I've mentioned before that I'm a navy and NSA vet of the Iraq war, necessitating a de facto scholarship in the realm of social sciences for the purpose of predicting threat vectors. which is fancy talk for being taught how and why people are awful so we can follow the bad apples... There is NO WAY for you to address this topic at all, without touching those topics you're trying to tap-dance around. In modern terms, major sects of conservative religions and cultures near and far are Cases in Point of what happens when insecure man-child incels get into power. These men (not all are men, but the proportion is overwhelming) don't give a crap about anything they espouse except insofar as it can bolster their own vices. From Colonel Custer to Jefferson Davis, to Joseph Smith to most Popes to Henry the VIII to Emperor Nero to Ayatollah Khomeini to Putin to Pol Pot to DeMarco to Xi to Kim Jong and on and on and on it's the same old song and dance with the same motivations. They'll say it's providence, gods' wills, the natural order, birthright, duty, "just plain right" or just "the Law". whatever they have to say or do to have it their way, they will. Cravenness and Greed are not uncommon traits. As you note with his projection, the first clue that a man is weak is that he's quick to call others weak. He assumes men are rapists because he's (at least mentally) a rapist (active or repressed) (Note: In parts of the middle east there is a virulent "rape culture" but it is not unique to middle eastern cultures, by any means: I'm looking at you evangelicals etc. that claim spousal rape isn't a thing...). "Real Men" don't have to talk about being "Real Men" all the damn time. speaking of anecdotal evidence, I tend to assume that any man that speaks that way is either a repressed homosexual themself, or packing a 10 second tic-tac... or both...

[@metrolinamartialarts]

I think you summed it up quite well.

[@mistersonnen848]

Firas is very intelligent and charismatic, but more and more is becoming a religious dogmatic while hiding behind his philosophical knowledge and using that as a crotch

[@metrolinamartialarts]

Yuuuup

[@TheNahidali91]

If a lady doesn’t want to roll with a man, it’s fine. Likewise, the opposite should also be fine. Be consistent

[@metrolinamartialarts]

You see, I said that in the video. My problem lies with him projecting his beliefs on to me then insulting me and my coaches by calling us cowards. Also, speaking of consistency, if it's sexual to roll with a woman, it is also sexual to roll with a man. So.... yeah

[@TheNahidali91]

@@metrolinamartialarts brother, you must appreciate there is no global consensus on culture. Muslims have a particular belief about physical contact between genders. I don’t know if that trainer imposed his belief on you, but personally, I’m not comfortable rolling with the opposite gender. I don’t make a fuss about it.

[@metrolinamartialarts]

@TheNahidali91 if you don't want to, cool. You're not insulting me. But for Faras Zahabi, It's hypocrisy no? A Muslim criticizing non-muslims with insults when, as you said, there's no consensus on global culture.

[@TheNahidali91]

@@metrolinamartialarts you know what, I respect you for stating your opinion without being insulting/aggressive, quite a rare thing over the internet!

[@metrolinamartialarts]

@TheNahidali91 I have Muslim friends and I respect the culture and ideas. My issue was with his wording, tone, and ambiguous intent. You didn't insult me or "yell" at me so no need for insults. Just dialog between people. 🤜💥🤛

[@Jagunco]

This is interesting as I did actually leave a group purely because there were a few people (enough to make it awkward) that I didn't enjoy training with. It wasn't the only reason I left. Not going into the reasons behind it, because a lot of it was probably my low tolerance for human intercourse, but it never once occurred to me that I could refuse to train with someone. I do recall waaaaay back in the 90's that a woman from a karate club I attended was thrown out because she refused to train with a particular man. You'll immediately think he was a sex pest or perv or something but he was one of the nicest and lest offensive people you've met, but had sever confidence and possibly mild learning difficulties which made him an easy target. And she refused by pushing him away and shouting 'I don't want him touching me' or something like that, I wasn't there. It sticks in my mind though because the joke of an instructor rather than confront her about it got me to put a letter through her door telling her not to come back. I was young and easily pushed into horrible jobs... sue me. And she had started trouble with no less than three other people in the group including offering up fist fights to people, so I think it was more just a convenient excuse to get shot of her. But I have to admit I've never understood the Muslim approach to women, or a lot of other things when I think about it. I don't class myself as a christian anymore (and I find it interesting that the spell check correct the capital letter for Muslim but not christian) but still a lot of christian rules still challenge me and make me think about my beliefs, but a lot of Muslim ones just confuse me.

[@metrolinamartialarts]

Wow! Interesting story. Sometimes people are toxic - it sucks. Plus being an introvert with a social battery- this can be very draining. Thanks so much for watching!

[@Jagunco]

@@metrolinamartialarts Thanks mate I got 100 tales from over the years. Helped by the fact that I've not always been luck in my choice of training venues. Its a wonder I still both lol.

[@schermanism]

I respect zahabi's opinions on mma and bjja, but when he starts talking about women, gender and social issues, it gets embarrassing

[@metrolinamartialarts]

Definitely agree

[@unmessable12]

In a kung fu movie or some shounen anime when someone says "we don't allow women to train here" we immediately roll our eyes at what must be a cliche bad guy, meant to represent the worst of the archaic traditions in martial arts culture that died out long ago....are we going backwards?

[@metrolinamartialarts]

Some would like that

[@notoriousquinnb]

Loving the Kick Start intro, and your viewpoint on this

[@metrolinamartialarts]

Thanks much!!

[@KickyFut]

I am *by far* NOT an expert on Islam. What very little I know is solely from meeting Muslims and interacting with them. But does the Quran not say: The Prophet (peace be upon him) said, “Seeking knowledge is an obligation upon every Muslim.” [Sunan Ibn Mājah 224] Women in Islam are not discouraged nor deprived from education, but rather encouraged to seek it. If you're a coach, fine you can be choosy. But if you run a *school,* and are refusing women to learn, you're going against your own religious teachings.

[@metrolinamartialarts]

Ooooh interesting

[@Haefaciel]

I just joined a dojo and began practicing Japanese Jujitsu and I joined BECAUSE the head instructor wants young girls and women to learn to defend themselves. At my last class, he was surprised but happy to see a class with more women than men which he said doesn’t happen often in his dojo. It’s up to responsible, empathetic men to HELP and TRAIN women to defend themselves and provide a safe environment to train. Oh and grappling is absolutely not sexy. Wtf. I’m getting put into uncomfortable positions that I have to get out of. The last thing on my mind is being aroused by the physical contact. I have massive respect for men that are welcoming of training women in this art/sport dominated by men. The skills are highly useful for women.

[@metrolinamartialarts]

That's awesome to hear!!!

[@deadmeatgames2]

Many people aren't mature enough to roll with the opposite sex. There are reasons I can see on both sides. Part of protecting your family is giving them the tools to protect themselves. But also making sure it's a safe place with the right people for your family to learn with. Just my opinion, Thanks. (Ps. Loved the rant!)

[@metrolinamartialarts]

Thanks for watching!!

[@hibernopithecus7500]

And how do you think they’ll develop the maturity to roll with the opposite sex, if not under the watchful eye of a mature teacher in a controlled environment? Let’s be honest here, what you meant was many men are not mature enough to roll with women. Nothing wrong with that, I’d say it was a statement of natural fact. But then those men should be given the opportunity to develop maturity in that area. The women shouldn’t be excluded simply because some men just aren’t there yet. Maturity comes from experience. It’s not just something that automatically happens when you age.

[@jakemorgan4938]

No excuse, Zahabi is scared of being told no. Totally support the right to say no to any situation that makes someone uncomfortable, for reasons religious or otherwise, but that doesn't mean you get to suppress the right of others to say no and defend themselves. Plain and simple.

[@metrolinamartialarts]

Definitely

[@benmoore6327]

Just a comment for support. Thoroughly and passionately said.

[@metrolinamartialarts]

Thanks so much!!

[@dobo9150]

So, one of the things I keep coming back to about the nature of self-defense especially, as distinct from but intersecting with what we may call "a martial art" or "martial arts," is the importance to self-defense of making people feel safe. To do "self-defense" on "da streetz," or in the home or other meant-to-be-safe places where immediate violence sadly occurs, or anywhere else, safety in relationships (or lack thereof) seems to consistently be a really big factor. Like, that kind of violence functions as a means to resolve feelings that would be better-resolved by therapy or supportive friendship than by throwing hands and applying submissions. Duh, right? So it makes me feel sad, too, to see moments where opportunities to train *that* are not merely missed but made a subject for hostilities from a teacher, coach or anyone else who sets out to be "on our side" in our journeys to feel safe by growing more capable. It works against the point completely. Now, like a fair question to my winging here would be, "Who is this guy trying to help feel safe with this kind of stance?" The clear answer is, "People who feel they have to be like this guy is saying, because they feel themselves held hostage by whatever social forces." Fine, then. No disrespect to people doing what they must to live will come from me. But it makes me feel sad, to see a coach encourage someone who is bullied to keep being bullied, without a word of toward discerning how to take up their side of that relationship on their own terms. Stopping now because I really do have a sermon/rant in me about it which could go on forever.

[@metrolinamartialarts]

It is discouraging

[@Emanuel_carey]

How dare you let your wife leave the house

[@metrolinamartialarts]

She shouldn't leave the kitchen!! (/sarcasm)

[@randomtvninja]

The issue is that he doesn't have a say in the Muslim community there's a difference between the cultural aspect and the religious aspect of Islam. And a lot of these opinions that he voices simply stems from the cultural aspect more than the religious aspect and that's what makes it such a huge negative It isn't necessarily the religion causing the issue more than it is this man's cultural belief of how he perceives his religion. I don't care what level of a coach he is he'll never earn my respect or any real practitioners respect in or outside of the Muslim community. And people that believe are follow his guidelines just because they're Muslim are again betraying their religion for their cultural bullshit.

[@metrolinamartialarts]

This might be the best comment on this. Thank you!

[@randomtvninja]

@@metrolinamartialarts I had a much more immature comment to post, but I waited till I watched the entire video and came with a more respectful one. I'm happy you saw it I look up to you in many ways I'm glad I discovered your account last year. Keep up the great work.

[@zohaib6021]

100% religion has to do with it. I am shocked that the uploader has 0 knowledge of it. What a ridiculous comment. Islam discourages male and females intermingling. This is to protect the MAN and WOMEN. You guys let your wife roll with other men. But for the majority we are fine where we are. You forget women DONT want to roll with men. Disappointed with the level of knowledge this channel is redundant of.

[@randomtvninja]

@@zohaib6021 cultural issue vs religious. Don't conflate one to be a fact of the other.

[@zohaib6021]

@@randomtvninja which fact are you stating? So far your comment has 0 basis of cultural or religious understanding.

[@jashue4757]

Its really unfortunate. I have competed in both boxing and kickboxing. I am slowly getting more into MMA. Theres a lot of nice people in the community. However.. those conservative views hold dominate based on my experiences from training and competing. I was raised in a religious background too but I am at this point in life to live and let live so as long as nobody tells me how I should live my own life. What bothers me in the martial arts community as well. Is that mystical view that most of us are wise and have sage like knowledge of the world. Never was the case. We are all just trying to figure things out like everyone else. It really sucks that close minded view really turns some people off who are just getting into fitness or even martial arts and we all get lumped into a stereotype of some meatheaded reactionary. We are not a monolith. Sorry for the rant. But good video brother keep it up!

[@MenkIsAMubtadiiDeobandi]

Sorry this is what happened because of Firas said. Please understand that for muslims the role model is prophet muhammad pbuh, and that bad manners have no place in Islam.

[@metrolinamartialarts]

Thanks so much Jashue!

[@ElDrHouse2010]

@@MenkIsAMubtadiiDeobandi Lies. Iran says otherwise. Idk if you are a Shia or a Sunni Muslim but if you follow that book to the letter the truth is that even tho it breeds moral people (in some aspects) it also breeds innmoral people in other aspects, they respect human self-agency less, especially the self-agency of the female. In the martial arts commuity & humanity at large you have fathers of daughters that care about them, maybe some Muslims see that care of the female as less important (I notice a lot don't care) but I do. Convert to Christianity. The Christians already had that reformation that was so needed, a religion that is unwilling to learn from their mistakes with no room for growth isn't a true religion, religions must seek to transcend our flaws, mainly behavioral to perfect us into our best moral versions so we can be worthy of a heaven.

[@MenkIsAMubtadiiDeobandi]

@@ElDrHouse2010 I am from sunnah and jamaah (Sunni), any other sect is deviant. I think on the contrary it promotes taking care of women and respecting them. In Islam when parents die its the duty of the brother to take care of his sister,, the husband has to provide the needs of his wife and pay for her expenses, she doesnt have to spend anything. Also our prophet pbuh said the best of muslims are those best to their wives. Please note forcing women to wear hijab, not allowing them to study are not part of Islam and this behavior is not appropriate. I also agree, this is a test to see if we deserve heaven or not. But Islam comes affirming that jesus is the messiah and the son of mary and correcting what happened with christianity. Jesus also said in the bible that no one knows the hour except the father, that is why we love him as a prophet, but understand that the only one worthy of worship is Allah. I have an older training partner who converted to Islam from christianity, and its evident its the right way to go if you love jesus, as Islam will never forsake him.

[@dmfaccount1272]

Firas losing his time in the limelight, no gap to promote him anymore.

[@dmfaccount1272]

Gsp. Not that firas is not a good coach, but I wonder if he's making controversial statements to get more attention because he doesn't have any big fighters anymore.

[@metrolinamartialarts]

@@dmfaccount1272 I think you may be on to something there.

[@foxlawrence7139]

Martial arts is for everyone. Period.

[@metrolinamartialarts]

Absolutely 💯

[@ianbrewster8934]

No sir you are 100% correct... If you don't feel comfortable rolling with somebody that is your choice. But don't tell everyone else who they should or shouldn't be rolling with or training with. As you said..." projection is showing".....

[@metrolinamartialarts]

Thanks so much for watching

[@shadowfighter6445]

I've never been in a relationship before but if I'm ever on my first date I'm going to bring her to a jiujitsu class, that way she can be safer for future dates 😄. Thank you for sharing ☺️.

[@metrolinamartialarts]

Thanks for watching!!!

[@yeout4386]

My sensei is a woman and she is a amazing martial artists and person

[@metrolinamartialarts]

That's awesome!

[@jeaniemcalpine8821]

Hey Ed, I’m a female that loves martial arts, really enjoy your content. Just wanted to say thanks for this video. It’s usually hard enough to enter a room where you’re often the only girl, but having someone as respected as yourself publicly trying to make it a more welcoming environment and standing up for everyone enjoying the arts together and having each other’s backs makes a difference. Thanks Ed, keep up the great work! ❤

[@metrolinamartialarts]

Thank you so much for the kind words 🙏 Here's hoping we continue boosting the numbers and make a fun welcoming environment for everyone!

[@AI_Ralph]

Martial arts is for EVERYONE. Firas has and always will be an idiot.

[@adriangarciasantiesteban8227]

Totally agree, everyone should be able to choose what to do with their lives as long as they don't harm others. Bjj as a sport or self defense is a pleasure that should be enjoyed by men and women alike. Great video I love the soundtrack.

[@metrolinamartialarts]

Thanks so much

[@fredeuhrbrand3789]

I don't know where this "your house, your rules comes from" - but where I live in Scandinavia I would consider reporting somebody for talking about controlling once wife to the degree referred to here. I don't know the English legal term - but that's 'social dominance' or manipulation or whatever. If partners have a conversation where they agree that one person should not... Do bjj, do bondage, eat cabbage... What ever... Thats fine,; great even. I love consensual decisions. Hell - I do MA I love consensual violence :-D But talking about what you 'let your wife do, and being a coward for not enforcing rules on her, is borderline illigal here. Maybe something gets lost in translation but.. Is that normal way to think about it in the states? In Canada? Is there a consensus that the man of the house can make decisions on behalf of a wife once...? Moved in? Married? Because I know Firas represent a religious groups opinion as well - but the way you talk about it... "THATS FINE"... Is it? Or are you just being diplomatic... It seems so weird to me.. :s Sorry if my language makes this too confrontational or incomprehensible. Cheers

[@metrolinamartialarts]

It's very weird and thank you for your comment!

[@fredeuhrbrand3789]

@@metrolinamartialarts that's actually a comfort :-) and you're welcome - i only resently discovered you from from some very good collaborations :-) . This is an admirable effort to keep the MA legit ethically as well. Important debate. Good day

[@jason3000ize]

Does he train his wife or daughter if he has any or does he think he's always going to be around to protect them? Jiu jitsu doesn't have to do with being sexual or does he think he's too weak to not make it sexual with a female student?

[@metrolinamartialarts]

Great questions

[@overtyrantfear]

My partner is a 6'2 lady from Denmark who boxes and works in the trades, covered in Nordic tattoo's. I'm not 'letting' her do shit lol. Big sweeping statements like that are so annoying. Where he lives(Quebec) though has some pretty strong laws around being public about your faith though for whatever that's worth and he faced some pretty extreme racism himself in the last year.

[@hibernopithecus7500]

Racism in what way?

[@metrolinamartialarts]

Oh interesting I didn't know that

[@Enthymene]

Agreed, it's super hard to say "female" without sounding like a county sheriff or a Ferengi. Thankfully it's almost never strictly necessary. 😆

[@metrolinamartialarts]

Lol 😂 I know

[@uke_mike]

Blew my mind when you started talking Japanese…awesome dude!! Great video, we covered it in a podcast as well, i agree with you 100%

[@metrolinamartialarts]

Thanks man!! Big fan of you guys and the podcast! 🤜💥🤛 Talk Jitsu is a weekly listen.

[@uke_mike]

@@metrolinamartialarts thank you for listening!! We appreciate it!

[@uke_mike]

@@metrolinamartialarts we need to get Nikki on the podcast sometime too, get a woman’s perspective on bjj, rolling with creeps, big guys etc..

[@metrolinamartialarts]

@@uke_mike that'd be great!

[@justacontrarian]

There are points made by Zahabi which may have merit. Maybe you guys can have a dialog on either of your platforms to iron out the differences? Similarly, when Armchair Violence brought up the topic a few years ago -- but it's about men not feeling comfortable rolling with women -- I agreed with those men. He addressed the fact that it's very unlikely that women would come into any given gym to intentionally cause trouble, but because of certain hashtag movements (among other things), it only takes one accusation to destroy a man's life. It just isn't worth it to roll with someone, so they feel "included." Now if (and only if) the dude brought it on himself, then so be it. In any case, now that I sometimes teach others, I definitely see your point -- and it's well made. I hope we can occasionally disagree with others without being completely disagreeable, and without losing subs just because people don't always agree with us.

[@metrolinamartialarts]

I don't mind disagreements, but the projecting that I'll be adulterous is, as Firas said, preposterous

[@BMO_Creative]

At first I thought Firas was saying Boyfriends and Husbands need to learn BJJ with women and they are cowards for not trying... Hmm ... guess I was wrong... LOL

[@metrolinamartialarts]

Lol oops

[@BMO_Creative]

​@@metrolinamartialarts LOL... Ya

[@mozolejos]

Was that Southern Japanese towards the end? 😂

[@metrolinamartialarts]

It was lol

[@mozolejos]

@@metrolinamartialarts perfect

[@abdulmahmood8592]

I get it in Islam were not allowed to touch women who were not married too I'm a Muslim and train BJJ/MMA When I roll with women I take it easy on them And I'm not married So all good If I train with a women who is married or whatever all good I only see it as training nothing more Been doing this since I was 14 This my 3rd tour Now I'm 29 years

[@pieguymcduck8600]

I wanna hear em say party on like I’m gettin welcomed into a hibachi place

[@metrolinamartialarts]

パーティーON♪

[@thestranger8937]

The sad part is that what he said actually happened to me. I know it was incredibly unlikely, but I guess it was just the way things went for me. I do muay thai, but my girlfriend of two years preferred something with less hard contact, so I recommended she try a Jiu Jitsu place in our area. Long story short, a couple months later she tells me herself that she's been cheating on me. It was definitely not just rolling that caused the situation but I can't deny that physical flirting would have been part of it. I know it was more of a case that I just wasn't good enough, but it's kind of put me off from relationships in general.

[@metrolinamartialarts]

I'm sorry that happened brother

[@thestranger8937]

@@metrolinamartialarts It sucks but it happens I guess. I doubt this has happened to Firas Zahabi though.

[@MachineAcademy]

Be never told anyone how to run their schools, he just said it how he sees it.

[@metrolinamartialarts]

And he sees it wrong

[@jmiahTNT]

Yeah I can honestly say that I dont agree with Zahabi on that point. At my Academy we encourage everyone to train with everyone within their comfort level but I wouldn't tell a woman not to train KB or jiujitsu in fact I encourage them even more! I try to make sure that they get rounds with a higher belt to know that they are in good hands. I'll also add that anyone who wants to roll with me, to roll with me, doesn't matter that I'm a Black Belt, like come pick my brain, ask questions, because my job is to help you get to your goals. Plus holding pads for my GF is a great bonding experience. Great video as always Ed, I know I feel weird saying females too, Tate kinda soured that word lol

[@metrolinamartialarts]

Thanks brother! I'm glad you are doing good things at your academy.

[@jmiahTNT]

@@metrolinamartialarts definitely. If you ever in Texas you and your students are always welcome 🙏

[@CarlosMendoza-mb3di]

Just to play Devil's advocate he didn't say all women . He was speaking of married women . I believe there is a point to be made for it . I've watched UFC fights among men and thought some positions they were in looked kind of erotic or in positions I may have been with a woman . Also TB 12's ex wife has been linked to her " Kids " ju jitsu instructor . There is a certain level of comfort another man shouldn't have with someone else's spouse. Whether that is personal space or touching certain parts of her body . Also with the fact that 70% to 80% of divorce are initiated by women with the excuses ranging from he cheated on me , he's not masculine enough , he's not paying me enough attention , he's never home , etc . The incidents you mentioned were incidents of unwanted contact . Like I said just play devil's advocate .

[@metrolinamartialarts]

My wife just said Jiu-jitsu in and of itself is a bit sus so..... yeah lol

[@jaden_shah]

this is such a brilliantly articulated, nuanced take, much respect brother!

[@jaden_shah]

Also pretty much every martial arts gym Ive ever been to also offers women only grappling classes, for the purpose of making sure everybody feels safe and welcome like wtf

[@metrolinamartialarts]

Thanks so much!!

[@josepioful]

I can only assume that no women train at his gym. Or is he ok rolling with another woman outside of his own wife/gf...? Does he not train any women in TriStar?

[@metrolinamartialarts]

I think he only let's them train striking.

[@michaelenns8872]

Yeah, that Zahabi dude should definitely shut up about women.

[@KCstark.]

well said dude everything on point.

[@metrolinamartialarts]

Thanks much!

[@josepioful]

I'll add that I have had the privilege of training under a savate, kickboxing champion that has trained alongside Paulson, Goodridge... and he trains his daughters in the art. Why? Because it works and protects them. I guess if your pride is more important than your families safety- Firaz is on to something. I guess he's shown he is a phenomenonal trainer for a certain set of ppl. Not that he gives a flying f--k what I say. Interesting to see what GSP et al. has to say about this.

[@metrolinamartialarts]

Me too.

[@zujostix]

As someone who is looking to get back into martial arts and considering BJJ this is rather nonsensical from Firas and you make very good points. To be completely honest, I'd be very of rolling with some people, but that is more connected to me being a rather uncoordinated oaf, severely overweight and used to using more strength than is probably necessary. But that is connected to concerns about injuring people and is nothing that cannot be remedied by a good coach (and getting in a better, healthier shape)

[@metrolinamartialarts]

That's different and 100% within your right

[@lukecockburn1140]

If your worried about potential violence/harm from a man to a women I don’t think it’s absurd to be worried about sexuality atleast from a fist person perspective That doesn’t necessarily justify not interacting with women like that but it is not a absurd concern I essentially see them as two sides of the same type of thing

[@amandawhitlock7899]

I have so many things to say but I'm just going to go with, good video, Ed!

[@metrolinamartialarts]

Thank you!!!

[@Ventus_the_Heathen]

The southern accent Japanese was so wrong but so right

[@metrolinamartialarts]

I call it Billy-Japanese lol

[@Ventus_the_Heathen]

That's the best name ever. Love your stuff man.

[@HUNKSTER99]

The problem is that this is not only what they believe in and their choice, but they try to impose their nonsense on others indirectly

[@metrolinamartialarts]

Exactly!! You get it

[@IamFree2]

"nonsense" funny

[@HUNKSTER99]

@@IamFree2 will, follow guy who assume ride donkey to the skies to tell us bunch of repetitive old unnecessary stuff with extra bullshit, I call it nonsense

[@IamFree2]

@@HUNKSTER99 احا.. دانت طلعت بلدياتي.. طب متروح يا عرص قولة كده في وشة فاي لايڤ استريم وشوف هيرد عليك بايه I assumed from the name that you know Arabic

[@_Wraith247]

I like pissed off Ed! I want to see pissed off Ed Spar Gabriel Vargas. :) I think you were on point with your comments. If you don't want to roll with someone, then don't. But don't try to prevent others from rolling with them. It's that simple.

[@metrolinamartialarts]

I definitely agree! Pissed off Ed vs normal Varga would be the same 🤣

[@ElDrHouse2010]

@@metrolinamartialarts Gabriel Varga is also a great moral man just like you. I like his wise commentary on issues that affect women as well, he did one recently related to Dana White about the video where he hits her. What a terrible husband & what a lack of integrity & honor from him.

[@arbogast4950]

I'm going to keep my comments on this channel light-hearted. I respect you too much to start debating the morality of accepting cultural differences. That being said, I see some shared traits among men who do or don't "let their wives" do things.....

[@metrolinamartialarts]

For sure

[@zakschrader9716]

This is why I hate cults.

[@00mrmoose]

I have a lot of respect for Firas Zahabi, but I couldn't disagree with this stance more.

[@metrolinamartialarts]

Same

[@Tibosan2]

Fortunately, I never seeked for Firas Zahabi conjugal advices! 🤷😂

[@metrolinamartialarts]

That's good, I think lol

[@BlackMartialArtsSociety]

Firas does have a point…. Why can’t she roll with her husband? If it’s self defense …. Get a gun.

[@metrolinamartialarts]

A gun is very helpful but not for other countries

[@lordsneed9418]

re: projecting and telling people how to live their lives. He was asked what he thinks of men who let their wives train jiujitsu with men and he answered honestly. everyone has a sense of right and wrong. it's not like we all stay quiet about what we think is right and wrong 24/7 incase someone with a different sense of right and wrong disagrees. Firas believes that men who aren't protective of their women are bad for society. if you thought something was bad for society , you;d sometimes say so too. you wouldn't say "live and let live. I'm not going to project" if you saw someone doing something unjust or wrong in a way that you believed harmed society.

[@metrolinamartialarts]

I mean, it's bad for society to let women live their lives?

[@lordsneed9418]

@@metrolinamartialarts Thank you for the responses. It depends, traditional people believe personal freedom needs to be limited for the greater good sometimes, e.g. public nudity, but in a wider range of situations than modern people do. I thought the best point you made is that if he's going to call all men who let their wives train with men cowards, then he should say that exact same thing directly to the faces of the mma fighters and coaches he knows who let their wives train with men, or else he's the one being a coward. That's going to be very difficult for him to deal with. it was very merciful of you to save that to the end of the video where the fewest people will see it rather than leading with that point at the beginning of the video. perhaps too merciful. if you had made that point at the beginning of the video then the video would have been a lot more hard hitting, attention grabbing, spread a lot more and he would have felt more pressured to respond, and other people with more clout whose wives and gfs train would have made the same point to him. "hey are you going to call me a coward? come and do it" , especially mma fighters since they'd be like "you're calling other men cowards when you've never stepped up as a pro and only ever did coaching?" If I were you and I wanted this to get more traction, I'd upload a youtube short video and tiktok of just firas saying "they're cowards those men who let their wives roll with men" together with that point you made of "are you going to call john danaher and gordon ryan cowards ?"

[@lordsneed9418]

The best point you made is that if he's going to call all men who let their wives train with men cowards, then he should say that exact same thing directly to the faces of the mma fighters and coaches he knows who let their wives train with men, or else he's the one being a coward. That's going to be very difficult for him to deal with. it was very merciful of you to save that to the end of the video where the fewest people will see it rather than leading with that point at the beginning of the video. perhaps too merciful. if you had made that point at the beginning of the video then the video would have been a lot more hard hitting, attention grabbing, spread a lot more and he would have felt more pressured to respond, and other people with more clout whose wives and gfs train would have made the same point to him. "hey are you going to call me a coward? come and do it" , especially mma fighters since they'd be like "you're calling other men cowards when you've never stepped up as a pro and only ever did coaching?" If I were you and I wanted this to get more traction, I'd upload a youtube short video and tiktok of just firas saying "they're cowards those men who let their wives roll with men" together with that clip of you making the point about will he call gordon ryan and john danaher and mma fighters cowards?

[@metrolinamartialarts]

I like that short idea. I'll do it

[@lordsneed9418]

@@metrolinamartialarts nice one

[@blankly01]

Not the usual vibe I see from your videos but then again, not the usual thing you react to. You got good points with regards to online etiquette and may be his statements should've been worded to be beneficial to all. Or just plainly be his opinion. And probably he has some other coaches under him that rolls with other genders for his gym. I dunno really. Anyway well said to your points :)

[@metrolinamartialarts]

Thanks for watching! Definitely wanted to try and step out of my usual vids for the challenge

[@oozieligus]

The video is about as nuanced as its title.

[@metrolinamartialarts]

Ah so it's incredibly nuanced.

[@zZTraCe]

He just doesn’t Have control of him self. It’s not tht big a deal. Just roll.

[@metrolinamartialarts]

I agree 👍

[@lordsneed9418]

you don't understand Firas and other people with a traditional mindset. They aren't worried their wives will start an affair because they sparred with a man from jiu jitsu class. The issue is that it's dishonorable and improper to let a man roll on top of your wife and grab her body like that, especially just for recreational purposes . It's similar to them to if you let your daughter or wife walk out the house in an extremely revealing top. It's also not a matter of not trusting your wife, but not trusting the men at the gym. A gym might have a hundred regular male customers, believing that every single one of them is going to be a saint is delusional. That doesn;'t make you insecure, rather if you believe that every single male customer at a gym is a saint then you're naive and delusional. So it's reasonable not to want your wife rolling with a few men who are going to take gratification from pressing weight from their hips or chest on her or staring at her chest up close or holding onto her body. Traditionally speaking, it;s honorable if a man is possessive of his woman and doesn't want other men to experience her , even if that experience doesn;'t lead to pregnancy or coitus or sexual contact. e.g. possessive of his woman not and wanting other men to see her naked. possessive of his woman and not wanting other men to grab her hips in north-south. etc.

[@metrolinamartialarts]

Honorable or not - I'm not "letting" my wife do anything or not. She's her own person. That's something these traditional ways tend to forget.

[@lordsneed9418]

@@metrolinamartialarts I understand. I was trying to help you understand their thinking better even if you don't agree with it.

[@MrSpiralling]

In my opinion this doesn't really matter, He can believe whatever he wants to believe ( free speech remember) this doesn't make him a bad coach

[@MrThonyfst]

That doesn't really hold up. If a belief interferes with your coaching, then it's a problem. Free speech doesn't mean you can say whatever you want and no one is allowed to say anything back. You say dumb shit, you get called out.

[@Ventus_the_Heathen]

It does make him a bad coach though, because he's creating a gym culture where men won't roll with women meaning his female students aren't getting meaningful self defense practice.

[@metrolinamartialarts]

Fair enough, but I think it does matter and makes it such that he's not a good coach if that's what he believes

[@MrSpiralling]

@@metrolinamartialarts he isn't forcing his male student not to roll with a woman, and his beliefs don't make him a bad coach

[@MenkIsAMubtadiiDeobandi]

@@MrThonyfst But you have the choice of training with him or not. I understand this is a bit strange, but there is a reason why there are classes for females separetly in many gyms. Firas follows Islam and as brothers of the same faith that are practicing we try to stick to the rules, even if we do many mistakes. Im sorry if he came across as a bit rude , the role model is prophet muhammad pbuh.

[@RadicalTrivia]

I'm fairly certain that Rickson himself features his own wife in many of his videos. End of story.

[@metrolinamartialarts]

Yuuuuuup

[@johnkoven3019]

The ending caught me off guard hahaha

[@metrolinamartialarts]

😅🤣

[@ismailf3661]

It’s simple. Islamically, after puberty age where appropriateness is a stronger factor, women can train grappling arts with women. Or with their own husband, or brother, or father, etc. Same goes the other way for the man. Point is training can be done, but we always keep our values in mind first.

[@metrolinamartialarts]

Yes, that's fine. But for you or other's to subjugate those not of your faith to the values of your faith - then mock, ridicule, and criticize them publicly is where I'm upset. That's where he is wrong.

[@haydenrogers2915]

Good video

[@metrolinamartialarts]

Thank you!!

[@Lionheart_Kickboxing]

Firas is a great trainer, but this is just silly. Women should be training because there isn’t always a protector. It’s ok if you don’t want to roll with women that is you it’s fine. I don’t roll with women to often when I do because I am a very big person. I also don’t roll with men who are too small for me. I can only pull my strength back so much. I still roll with smaller people and moderate the size difference but there is a limit. And that’s not in them that on my inability for finer control

[@metrolinamartialarts]

Definitely agree

[@IsaIbrahim-n8f]

He said he won’t let his wife roll with another man, not train jujitsu in general. He said in another interview that it should be a requirement for you to make your daughter & wife AT LEAST reach a blue belt in jujitsu. Don’t take stuff out on context. His wife has a blue belt by the way

[@metrolinamartialarts]

I didn't take it out of context. It's his words. Find the podcast. But who does his wife and daughter roll with? He can't let them roll with other men. Can HE even roll with them? Or is it haram?

[@Rasmusfreepalestine]

​​@@metrolinamartialarts he can roll with his wife because she is he's wife (even if he gets a boner or whatever he can have sex with her because it's not haram ) he can roll with his daughter because they are family ( it is not haram to roll with your wife or daughter)

[@FranzStFleur]

6:49 True

[@Kottenification]

Great work, Ed. I really enjoyed this content (and I don't even do BJJ) :-) You are so wise.

[@metrolinamartialarts]

Thanks so much!

[@miguelkubrusly]

thanks 4 this video. Zahabi is totally outdated. and i want more people like u, advocating how insane he is. the one thing is good about what he says, is that we actually listen and debate his fallacies

[@ghengiskhan9308]

Firas and many Muslim from why experience have to find some king of way to justify their beliefs beliefs if they don't agree with them

[@hichammout4866]

He was invited by ahmed subbor, and by checking his content it's clearly dedicated to Muslims, so the message is clear to Muslim Community, so nobody is projecting his believes on nobody.

[@metrolinamartialarts]

Not projecting his beliefs - his thoughts on men who "let" their wives Train with men. It's fine if he doesn't, that's his prerogative. But it projection

[@SA-dl1lm]

I don’t wanna say it but Firas has a point. Some people shaming him for not rolling with women so he shame them back.

[@metrolinamartialarts]

He's projecting. I said it in the video - it's his choice. But he can't call me a coward for "letting" my wife roll.

[@kazituhin7119]

​@@metrolinamartialartsYou are coward because you can't offer protection to your wife so she has to learn it from other man to protect herself. And the last thing that happens is that man is having an affair with your wife.😂

[@metrolinamartialarts]

@@kazituhin7119 you're obviously not paying attention. 🙄

[@joshuaowens3611]

Damn, Ed don't mince words, tell us how you really feel. Lol.

[@metrolinamartialarts]

Hahaha I tried not to!

[@cahallo5964]

I am not gonna say anything other than all my experiencies rolling with women have been bad, always whiny and you have to go 10% because they are like those wimps that say "you are too strong man" but instead of saying it to you they'll publicly complain. Purely anecdotal, I know, I am glad you have had different experiences tho, cool. I ain't rolling with women anymore tho

[@metrolinamartialarts]

You're free to make that choice. I always tend to think that I try to use speed and technique when working with ladies because I have a size and strength advantage.

[@cahallo5964]

@@metrolinamartialarts that only works if the female in question isn't trying to frame you for something because she thinks you don't like her. I've met nice women in Karate tho it seems that it's just bjj attracts strange people because it's still very niche where I live.

[@akintomartialarts3647]

Absolutely based

[@jashardwallington]

He aslo said you shouldn't train in weapons which dumb 😂😂😂 of course you should train in weapons

[@metrolinamartialarts]

Wow

[@Dawood4]

They have women only classes near me. Many women aren't comfortable training with strange men either. I trust my wife, just not other men. I also won't roll with women because I have to think too much about where not to grab/push from and really go like 70% as I'm a bigger dude.

[@metrolinamartialarts]

That's fair and within your right - but you're not a coach or school-owner.

[@the_guitarcade]

Is KZbin deleting my comments?

[@metrolinamartialarts]

I see this one

[@the_guitarcade]

If it's KZbin doing it, searching for Lloyd de Jongh explains why the subject of this video said what he did in his Playlist on Ìşłªmıĉ jurisprudence.

[@the_guitarcade]

@@metrolinamartialarts I think the problem was that one or two of the words I was using are things that are automatically flagged by KZbin as hate speech, even though the way I was using them could not be rationally interpreted as such.

[@amir650]

Bad look for Firaz. Zealot.

[@metrolinamartialarts]

Agreed

[@ishrakalvi4446]

If a woman teaches a woman, thats not a problem.

[@metrolinamartialarts]

How does the first woman learn?!

[@ishrakalvi4446]

​@@metrolinamartialartsThe way the first man learned.

[@metrolinamartialarts]

@ishrakalvi4446 so because she's a woman, she's not gotta be century's behind? Makes no sense man

[@ishrakalvi4446]

​@@metrolinamartialartsGym trainer sexually assaulting a female trainee that makes sense to you😂 Gym trainer and married female trainee having an affair makes sense to you😂 No wonder why you guys are so degenerate! Don't you understand that when you literally come in touch with a woman's body certain hormones in your body as a man starts skyrocketing and vice versa. It's a common biological fact about male female attraction.But guess what, that won’t make sense to you because you are a non sense😂

[@metrolinamartialarts]

You completely missed the point then accused me of misconduct? Bruh, you've probably never touched a woman.

[@BlackMartialArtsSociety]

As a coach When getting my certification i learned that coaches wield a certain power that makes it easy to be attractive to women…. So yeah men rolling with married women……not necessary for any thing

[@metrolinamartialarts]

It's just sparring - that's what I was getting at

[@phx4closureman]

9:39 😆😆😆😆😆

[@metrolinamartialarts]

I was mad

[@phx4closureman]

​@@metrolinamartialartsI feel ya, and I agreed with EVERYTHING you said.

[@metrolinamartialarts]

@@phx4closureman thanks so much!

[@ronmka8931]

well here's the issue, these insecurities are well justified since that's how plenty of affairs start (though most likely not common in bjj, just making a wild guess), this stems from the idea of having a strong security system but being uncomfortable when anyone tries to break in even though they would most likely fail, (you wouldn't exactly be comfortable with leaving a secure car in a bad neighborhood). this has been the reason why in history married women wouldn't form (non-sexual) relationships with other men as it was seen as a sign of infidelity, though with bjj to me i dont see it as a problem though i only roll with ugly women

[@metrolinamartialarts]

That last line 🤣 But you don't think that before women wouldn't form those relationships was because they didn't have autonomy?

[@ronmka8931]

@@metrolinamartialarts no not really, most cultures didnt keep their women inside all the time (with some exceptions of course), instead, it was a widespread cultural idea that married women would be seen as someone you shouldn't try to form any sort of relationship to as a man because remember most of society historically lived in tight communities, and so when you have an affair with a married woman, expect a gang of men to come to your house and murder you. infidelity is very bad for communities because it would threaten the family unit (the husband would kill both the wife and the man as revenge or just kick her out) leaving plenty of kids without a mother or father, and most of the time spells doom for the family, and so culturally adultery would be seen as something to avoid at all costs (remember there used to be laws for executing adulters around the world). and so the next logical conclusion is to minimize any threat of adultery on the woman's side and so it becomes culturally unacceptable to spend time with people of the opposite sex as friends. this then ties back to bjj and rolling with women, a man wont be comfortable with his wife rolling with other men for what ive described above, there is always a chance that his wife after an argument would be more inclined to start an affair (it does surprisingly happen and usually they regret it). imo i think married men and women shouldnt roll with the opposite sex.

[@metrolinamartialarts]

@@ronmka8931 to each their own, but I think it's an archaic way of thinking

[@ronmka8931]

@@metrolinamartialarts not exactly, because this is somewhat of a cycle of sexual promiscuity, such as during the times of the Romans where the women stopped wearing the veil and started to become more promiscuous which is then followed by a harsh reversion to sexual repression as a reaction of this sexual promiscuity. men and women free interacting and forming sexual relationships isnt exactly a new thing. i mean the world didnt just suddenly change from idiots to masterminds in the 20th century

[@metrolinamartialarts]

@@ronmka8931 you're talking about ancient Rome and not being archaic? Ok

[@ArmchairViolence]

Letting your wife train BJJ is cowardly, but getting butthurt about her having the same martial arts resources as you is courageous? No idea what Zahabi's logic is here.

[@metrolinamartialarts]

It's definitely lost

[@cjsher90]

Holy shit! Ed can get mad!

[@metrolinamartialarts]

Oh I can lol