FNAF: SB REWRITTEN - CH 13 (AO3 WRITTEN VERSION AVAILABLE!)

Link to written version: archiveofourown.org/works/454...

[@kiwiqueen138]

Gregory: *repairs three entire animatronics using only a manual and a 2nd grade education* The technicians who went to college for 5 years to be qualified enough just to ENTER the maintenance rooms: 👁👄👁 Link to next episode: kzbin.info/www/bejne/bGKqmYp6gsZol6M Link to previous episode: kzbin.info/www/bejne/d3q8eZetmdp_nJI Link to full playlist: kzbin.info/aero/PLKMzqZUiHWUjzZj0jfJym1CTORp4rdEDD LINK TO WRITTEN VERSION: archiveofourown.org/works/45445291?view_full_work=true

[@yolo55brandon5]

😅😊

[@ThienNguyen-in6gx]

A employee talking behind Jeremy Miller's back. Why did we have to get those qualifications I bet even a child could use this.

[@cyanide_crow7970]

Man if I was Gregory and saw what was possibly the dismembered body parts of my brother in a bunch of animatronics I'd literally just collapse and pass out for the rest of the night

[@wildwinter1971]

real

[@enderniffler628]

37:56- I think this is the first time we’ve heard Gregory come close to laughing? If so it’s a fun detail to show that Gregory is a little more trusting of the animatronics!

[@TheSansationalSans]

Spoilers Hm... Is it only me that thinks that these human parts may be from a certain missing child? The fact that they are new and Gregory's brother recently went missing... That is going to be a fun reveal if that is the case. I mean, it is possible that the kid is still alive; one can live without teeth, fingers, eyes and a tongue, but I am pretty sure given Afton's track record that he is dead.

[@squiddyflip3039]

ALRIGHTY EPISODE REVIEW! Oh golly this one was intense, I kind of thought that because this rewrite was going to be in book form, that it wasn't going to be that scary, and that the "Oh be quiet" scenes would be the worst of it. But BOY was I wrong- the white boxes and the scrap pit scene got me listening with my mouth gaping open. Aside from the scare factor, I love the little character developments and details. Monty and Roxie working out their own issues, kind of having a slightly comedic dynamic, Freddy becoming less naive, Chica getting to talk again, the puppet twins having a bit of care for one another, but surprisingly GREGORY'S character getting more brave! Honestly, going into this I thought I would have a side character as my favorite but I *love* what you did with Gregory. Also DJ Music Man is really wholesome.

[@cookieandme23]

I love how the picture changes throughout the episode with each new fix

[@Lizzy_Stories09]

I love sun freaking out it just made me more interested in the chapter

[@Dropsydrowsy]

I officially love Friday’s now

[@connieflorey4288]

REAL

[@PixelPower0615]

...I think this is where we are officially moving into the horror territory. I mean...SPOILER WARNING: having kids' body parts inside the animatronic's heads??? Holy fuck.

[@JoshuaA1307]

…. I don’t want to check DJ’s 😢😢

[@dweebystars1099]

I got genuinely spooked by this episode, great job. This has got to be your most horrifying episode yet.👍🏼

[@twist_ending7545]

Spoilers for the chapter Y'know I'm glad there were just teeth in Freddy's head, for a second I thought the clinking sound of Gregory grabbing them was a weird wet sound. I thought they were eyes for a sec. Imagine my surprise when Gregory instead found a pair of eyes in ROXY'S head instead

[@twist_ending7545]

I wonder if they could've used the hand from Roxy's broken arm if they brought it with them

[@Marshie_Gum]

I mean the wires were cut with Roxy's teeth so idk if it would've been usable

[@johnc._9822]

Oh my goodness, Musicman on the thumbnail looks so sad.

[@bloopstheduck]

44:19 Gregory what's uncomfortably,?!?!?! (turn on closed captions)

[@soap699]

How does youtube fuck this up

[@crimsonsilvermoon]

I know lol

[@CassetteTapestry]

Omg I love thisssss!! More questions for you! Also I love how you replaced chicas beak immediately after she gets it back as well as the change of roxy and freddys eye!!! So awesome! 1: what did moon/chica/roxy think/feel/react on the inside whilst Gregory was helping them? 2: Are some of the changes Gregory did temporary? Roxys eyes and chicas endoskeleton, for example? 3: Vanessa's new partner... is it an afton perchance? Or her brother? A resurrected father? 4: ...are the staff bots in the pit still functionable.... alive? 5: is subject one MMMMMUSIC MAN? 6: how is sun doing? 7: if/when both sun and moon are unconscious, are they able to talk to one another freely? Or is there a mind barrier of some sort? I'll add on if I think of any more! Loved the episode and I'm amazed at how much production goes into each video, even subtle changes like the background image! You are an amazing writer and creator!

[@kiwiqueen138]

I’ll answer as many as I can, but some of them, you just have to wait and see the answer in the future lol 1: they were all probably terrified, because a literal child was doing surgery on them Lmao 2: you’ll have to wait and see :) 3: you’ll have to wait and see :) 4: Pretty much 5 :) 6: sun is really disoriented right now, he has no idea what the hell is going on and still thinks that Moon is lying to him 7: This might be kind of difficult to explain, but I’ll try anyway - When sun is on the inside, he can either be talking with moon, or he can sleep. If moon was on the inside, he would also be able to either talk or sleep. So just because one of them is on the inside doesn’t mean they’re automatically unconscious. The only reason why sun is unconscious for the majority of this time is because he’s exhausted, it’s not just because moon is out right now. I don’t know if that actually answered your question, but I tried my best. And thanks for the compliments! :D

[@CassetteTapestry]

@@kiwiqueen138 thanks for the answers! And no problem! Loving the seriesssss

[@cycloneabsol9405]

Why. In the actual FUCK. Was there a *goddamn* ***SEVERED. TONGUE.*** Inside of Chica's Endo head?!?!?! Edit: And TEETH?! Actual, human TEETH inside Freddy?! And they could SEE THAT?!? KIWI YOU ARE A GENIUS AND I LOVE YOU AND I HATE YOU. Edit that if it isn't the end I will never sleep again: EYES. HUMAN, FLESHY EYES INSIDE ROXY. JUST.. WHY. Also, from a story perspective, why teeth for Freddy? The others it kinda makes sense, Roxy is associated with her eyes and Chica with her beak/mouth, but teeth? That's weirdly random. Edit 4: God damn it.

[@kiwiqueen138]

I can probably answer why it was teeth for Freddy, since it’s not a big secret or anything: In the eyes of Fazbear Entertainment, Freddy is the centerpiece of the cast of characters, and so he is always expected to smile :)

[@cycloneabsol9405]

@@kiwiqueen138 Ohhhhh. Nice touch!

[@squiddyflip3039]

OHH NOOO

[@gnarlyagent594]

another episode, another masterpiece. 10/10 hands down.

[@bon-bon8482]

*I should not have watched this in the middle of the night* I freaking love this series, and this white box stuff scared the hell out of me, I don't think I'll be falling asleep anytime soon.

[@duilena]

None of the episodes have actually scared me up until now. This was horrifying. I do feel like the eyes, and the comment that they're brown, should have been last.

[@swiftyoooo]

i feel like gregory's repairs are going to be temporary. hes just a kid, there aint no way he did it right, im thinking just enough to work for some time

[@sindraile5128]

Honestly, I agree. It would take a few attempts even with the appropriate education. And that would probably be with supervision from a mentor at least.

[@swiftyoooo]

OH GOD KIWI HEARTED IT WHY

[@blistineduh3088]

@@swiftyoooo you're just too smart

[@LIZZANIMA1]

Maybe you could do poppy playtime Rewritten? Just a idea

[@mythicaldrawer7072]

They actually kinda did their own animatic on it. So it could be possible, but it's mostly up to Kiwi if they want to do it or not.

[@cycloneabsol9405]

HOLY- HOLY- HOLY SHIT I WANT TO WATCH IT BUT IT IS *AN HOUR AND FORTY MINTUES* LONG KIWI YOU MADWOMAN!!!

[@Wee_Mewon]

Oh god it’s almost 2 hours Of course I’m immediately gonna watch it Edit: that was....... oh god...

[@jellywolf5141]

Me listening to the part about the dismembered body parts: “NO! NO NO NO NO NO!” *Several curses later* “…This is amazing!!!” 😅

[@whisper_ishere518]

I noticed that the body parts found inside the white boxes correspond to what animation if they are from. Freddy has teeth (Honestly don't know on that one, maybe a nightmare Fredbear reference?), Roxy has eyes, obvious similarity to the fact she has the ocular upgrade, Monty has fingers, a similarity to the claws he has, and Chica has the tongue, which is similar to the fact she can talk better. Were the white boxes what gave them the upgrades? (Also your Roxy design is fricking adorable!!)

[@kiwiqueen138]

No, the severed human parts were not what gave them the upgrades. Those were given for a purpose that can be inferred later on in the story, but they were not the cause of with the animatronic’s sentience or anything. (I’m only half-spoiling this because I don’t gain anything from the audience misunderstanding the real purpose of the white boxes, so I don’t want the lore to be more confusing than it needs to be haha) Also thanks for the compliment about Roxy :)

[@Thebluemamott]

Ngl, there was no way I could've even been anywhere near something like that, in Gregory or Freddy's situation.

[@denominator4663]

Dj music man looks so cute!

[@Agentpman1]

This has been the best episode yet. I love this series so much!

[@lexxblep-groundzero1369]

this is so cool just hearing gregory do this more detailed is so awesome! i never reallyu liked the fact that Gregory is repairing them the animatronics are so cool the game can't be as detailed but hearing him actually do the process and in a detailed and real manner it felt real and i really really loved it good job ^^

[@lexxblep-groundzero1369]

UGH VANESSA YOU SICK UGH these boxes are freaky EW EW EW EW

[@lexxblep-groundzero1369]

I adore the way the sound effects work and the picture changes as everyone is repaired its so cool and awesome AAAA I LOVE THIS!!

[@koopajuniorsavannah5170]

Wow this made my Friday better

[@cloudyz..editz_]

I can’t believe I have to wait to watch this chapter ahhh T^T It’ll be so worth it though omg

[@lavendertoastmoth]

Holy hell! This was genuinely upsetting, and that makes me so happy, this was GOOD

[@saiid99]

look at you now.. you are all full grown up.. i remember the old days when you made steven universe videos..

[@JoshuaA1307]

Gregory and the animatronics will have Therapy and FE will pay for it

[@cycloneabsol9405]

WHY IS VICTOR'S FIRST JOURNAL ENTRY REDACTED?!????

[@wildwinter1971]

I can imagine these in my mind too well...

[@koopajuniorsavannah5170]

I just noticed a figure behind Vannynis that a robot or a human?

[@swiftyoooo]

it looks like a rabbit tbh, with a muzzle. the ears seem pinned to the head and myabe stuck with the muzzle straps?

[@jaidendoesrandomstuff-4619]

It might be bonnie! If you look back at kiwis designs for the 4 you can see Bonnie has his ears down like the thing in the back

[@krohl]

@@jaidendoesrandomstuff-4619 I think spring trap is using Bonnie's 'spare parts' so to speak, I hope I'm wrong.

[@ermacmacro7136]

It took me this long to realize that you worked in all the animatronic upgrades that would normally be patched into Freddy Chica lost her beak and her voice Roxy had her eyes melted and chewed off one of her clawed arms Clever Kiwi. Very clever

[@spiritofchaos58]

Oh boy, looks like everyone gets to experience The Horrors. Getting thrown into what is essentially a pile of corpses must be horrifying. I appreciate that you didn't shy away from showing the animatronics' horror. On a lighter note, I bed Roxy was cursing Monty out to hell and back for paralyzing her like that. If not for the whole "getting distracted by a pile of corpses" thing, she probably would have kicked his butt lol.

[@cycloneabsol9405]

Hey, Kiwi, quick question (sorry if this is too spoiler-y) Will we ever see Jeremy in the main story, or will he just remain a character in the LOOORRREEE at the end?

[@Lizzy_Stories09]

51:52 for some moon and sun content

[@cycloneabsol9405]

14:32 Wait, chest *captivity*? That sounds like a typo, but Kiwi said it twice without correcting it, so...

[@kiwiqueen138]

Yeah, I spelled it correctly in the document but miss-spoke when recording, I only noticed after uploading the episode and kind of just hoped that nobody noticed lol whoops

[@cycloneabsol9405]

@@kiwiqueen138 lol. Just thought I'd check to make sure that calling is a "chest captivity" wasn't lore relevant

[@espressolattestudios]

I LOVE YOUR STORY!!!!!

[@Sageknot]

Shouldn't it be a chest cavity, not a chest capacitor? or am i dumb (when Gregory reads the manual for the first time)

[@Mr.encore]

Ok questions why is entry one March 13 all blank and 2 who ever the secound person is is that bonnie but got reprogrammed or is it jermey

[@RobloxKaren420]

YAY

[@ThienNguyen-in6gx]

Ok PBML those are the letters we have.

[@taniatokustar7737]

ITS PEPAW AFTON!!!!

[@CandyAkira]

If the script was released, I would definitely read it ❤

[@TheClodWhoEatsLogs]

Will you ever make SU content again?

[@cycloneabsol9405]

Hey, Kiwi, have you ever thought about uploading the transcripts of these chapters? I know you get migraines, so I'm not asking you to type them up or anything, but I can't imagine scanning your notebook would be **that** hard, and having something to read along with would do wonders for my ADHD brain to focus on the story

[@kiwiqueen138]

Only problem is, I’m not exactly sure how to do that efficiently? But if you have a method that I could use, that would be good :)

[@cycloneabsol9405]

@@kiwiqueen138 I don't know how to use a scanner, but I know from SU:F that you do, so I'll skip that part. Once you have the images on your computer, I would think you could just upload them to Google Drive and link them in the descriptions. Would that work?

[@amipk5292]

POSSIBLE SPOILER This episode high key gave me Magnus Archives vibes

[@oliverroystone2253]

I predict that the organs are from james and are what vanessa did as test 1

[@jaidendoesrandomstuff-4619]

YIPPEE Edit: DEAR GOD THAT GOT MORBID 😧

[@heavenlyNoomba]

There is no way that this is a coincidence Every single episode has the black screen and this one says KPLKO I think idk what it means

[@milesprower6641]

The comments are turned off on your Steven universe video. And as thus, the pinned comment is missing

[@jackusy3414]

If DJ had one that was just… the rest… oh god

[@squiddyflip3039]

51:04 okay hear me out.. he probably won't DIE because he's the protagonist, but he *could* come close.. is this foreshadowing?

[@squiddyflip3039]

52:08 ARHG MY HEARTSTRINGS

[@squiddyflip3039]

58:00 girl you did NOT just add that sound effect oh NOo

[@squiddyflip3039]

Scratch that ALL the white box sound effects were *disgusting* oh my GOSH you outdid yourself (Also sorry for the long chain of replies, I'm trying to do the timestamp thing but I'm not used to it (':)

[@squiddyflip3039]

Okay so 51:04 WAS kinda resolved

[@twist_ending7545]

Does this chapter not have a name?

[@kiwiqueen138]

Oh whoops, you just help me figure out that I didn’t put a thumbnail. Fixed it now, thanks :)

[@heavenlyNoomba]

Spoilers Why does Freddy Closes his eyes like he's looking at his own Kind getting ripped apart. It's Only repairs, is it because they see them selves like we see are selves

[@krohl]

Could be the "penny smell" Gregory described, blood has a coppery taste/smell in large quantities. The rusty copper smelling metal plus the uncanny Valley trait (things that feel human but not quite), might be triggering fight or flight similar to seeing injured humans. Thus having the same effect, Gregory sees them as human enough not to mention caring for them. = A not so good time for Greg boi :D

[@krohl]

Whoops thought you asked why Gregory was disturbed :>

[@mythicaldrawer7072]

Well, I imagine it is the same as a human watching another human getting surgery. Though some people managed to stomach it, Freddy and the gang haven't done it to each other; so it would make sense why they are squeamish with it.

[@ZikedY]

This a long one