Frustrating Things Enneagram Eights Do

[@brandonmshrock]

My mom is an 8... and oh boy is this all so true! It is so beautiful when an 8 opens up and lets you into their inner selves.

[@AbbeyHowe]

SO BEAUTIFUL!! ♥️

[@Adriana.Gabriela]

Omg, slow walkers are *the worst* , especially when they walk in groups or in the middle of the pavement, so you can't bypass them on either side

[@AbbeyHowe]

the absolute worst. especially for type 8 New Yorkers who venture into other places in the US 😂

[@martinap5860]

YES! Groups of them! I had to literally bulldoze through them yesterday. Such lack of respect! 😆

[@AlanaL3]

Wow…being a wing 9 makes me a lot less intense than this description.

[@rachelwoods5648]

I couldn’t stop laughing as this was so relatable. I’m an 8w9 so I may not go as extreme but the conflict one was so accurate 😂

[@AbbeyHowe]

🤣 thanks for commenting!

[@MarisaSueStalvey]

SAME!

[@StephanieJeanne]

This sounded like someone I used to know. I needed time to collect my thoughts in conflicts, but he wouldn't let me. The slow-walker thing was funny, but yes! He hated slow-walkers, too. Thanks, Abbey. Glad you're feeling better. I really appreciate your videos. 🌞✌️

[@AbbeyHowe]

thanks, Stephanie. your support is so encouraging to me. ♥️

[@marishaten7399]

Great video! I love anything about Enneagram 8s because they seem like such honest, authentic people. Also, I have a request. Would you consider doing skits about countertypes? Many of us have had trouble typing ourselves because we couldn't fit ourselves into any of the stereotypical types. In the end the countertypes helped us understand our Enneagram. I really believe the skits would help us relate to the types better. Thanks a lot for all the hard work you put into these videos.

[@AbbeyHowe]

yes! that would be super helpful. I will put it in my trello board. thanks, Marisha

[@marishaten7399]

@@AbbeyHowe ❤❤

[@87b775st]

@@AbbeyHowe seconding the request for countertypes! bonus if you can emphasize the difference between being a countertype, and simply not being that type at all

[@test-kf2zv]

I see you've met my boss. That said, this does help me better understand her. I would say she is an unhealthy eight who definitely doesn't understand that not everyone does well with her communication style.

[@stefanpanson1620]

I am the one who usually needs time before conflict- because I KNOW I'm not chill in the moment. Also, I'm actually a very trusting person- but when I have been vulnerable, I have been betrayed- which is why I don't like being vulnerable.

[@leonking9953]

I love being an 8. I love that we are like this. 8 superiority reins supreme. We are the bad guys tryna be good. We will take a bullet for others but will just as quickly kill and die for our loved ones. Anger is a gift. Winning is a lifestyle. Keep pushing yourselfs past barriers and running through brick walls my 8 comrades. I know you’ll win whatever challenges are in front of you

[@Avionne_Parris]

Gosh Abs, this made me laugh so hard! Hope you're doing well. Shoutout to Jon and Lemon Drop for their cameo performances :P Type 8 is my spirit animal, love their bluntness and fearless nature. As a 4w3, I appreciate the truth in a ripped band-aid sorta way (but maybe that's just me lolz). I get impatient with small talk and beating around the bush too. Be concise, salient points only; give it to me straight, no chaser. I live vicariously through my type 8 characters. They say things I wish I could say but I don't want to look bad or mean. I admire type 8s. More power to them :-)

[@AbbeyHowe]

Jon was the true hero here. Lemon was only in the skit because he wouldn't stop whining if I wasn't holding him 😂

[@Tiogar60]

I don't think 8's fear betrayal or expect the worst from people, especially those they care about. That's more a 6 trait. But they do keep people at a distance because letting others see their vulnerable side is incredibly scary.

[@nathanielbrown3104]

I am a 9 w 1 and I have long been cautious of the 8 because of their well challenging conflict stance. Within the last week or so I have seen more of my 8 with than I ever realized I had or showed and this video is another example of that...

[@AbbeyHowe]

everyone has access to both of their wings even if you more dominantly see the 1 come out. love that you're discovering new sides of yourself.

[@luciawara-goss3921]

Me me me me me. The only thing my dating coach ever told me was to go to church and get serenity and quit being angry. I'm enneagram 8! You just basically are saying to stop being me!

[@trinaq]

Thanks for your hilariously relatable video, Abbey! I've known plenty of Type 8s in my time, and this suits them to a tee!

[@AbbeyHowe]

You're so welcome! Thanks for watching and commenting, Trina!

[@francesca.pellegrino]

"No problem, I'll do it better than he did anyway." -- Me

[@minniepom6012]

#2 is interesting because it overlaps with the people-pleasing aspect of an Enneagram 9, which otherwise can be very different from an 8. As a 9w8, I could definitely see myself in that one.

[@myoldmanbaby]

I'm a 9w8, but have a pretty strong wing. I related to this more than the usual 9 stuff. Not number 2 though. My rest is a top priority. ;)

[@ItsKimOlson]

Roast me! "Don't tell me what to do." "Quick to anger," gets me in trouble. Had to learn how to "control" that, like The Hulk. I was always leader on group projects and PREFERED, REQUESTED to work alone. "Get to the point." **Shoving out of the way.** 🤣🤣🤣 Walking or driving. My job has me walking through grocery stores. You'll hear me coming and you better get out of the way. (I will politely say excuse me, but if you do not move...) Slow anything. Indecision. HURRY THE F*** UP! My phone is working slowly and I am QUICK TO ANGER! "I'm cool. I've never been colder!" While yelling. 🤣🤣🤣 I trust NO ONE.

[@M.j.7]

I could relate to all of these other than the needing to talk about things right then and there… depending on what it is, especially if it involves vulnerability… I sometimes need space to think or just don’t care enough (of course depending on what and who it is, I’m not a monster lolz). I have definitely said the talking in circles before though 🤣🤣🤣

[@AbbeyHowe]

totally get that! thanks for sharing your perspective, MJ!

[@LunaFreiheit]

My mom is an 8 and unfortunately it is the only type I can’t get along with 😅 I can’t handle with 8s bluntness in my life anymore - an 3w4

[@BombshElle_7]

I would think an 8 and a 3w4 would get along very well. Both are blunt, hard-working, and authentic.

[@87b775st]

@@BombshElle_7 most 3s i've known are not what i'd call blunt at all. even the aggressive finance 3s are usually quite diplomatic when you speak one-on-one with them, and they tend to care what others think of the, which is a contrast to 8s.

[@rachelwong3474]

This is honestly true😆😆 trying to grow and improve each day 😆😆

[@leonking9953]

Also you are the only enneagram teacher I trust. You know us 8s so well and you always get it right. Kudos to you

[@AbbeyHowe]

aw shucks 😊 hehe my mom is an 8! She says that 8s are the jerks of the Enneagram but she says it so proudly

[@leonking9953]

@@AbbeyHowe yup she’s absolutely correct. Being called a jerk for an 8 is such a compliment 😈

[@loganbyrd2024]

Have you ever done a video on the Positive Outlook/Reactive/Competency triads? I watched your other triads video, and I'm definitely withdrawn, but I'd like to learn about the other triad groupings, too.

[@AbbeyHowe]

Not yet! I have so many videos I want to do 😬 but will add that to the list 💕

[@loganbyrd2024]

@@AbbeyHowe I'm looking forward to it. You never fail to amaze me!

[@Noah-bp4gu]

Omg the one about taking on too many tasks! I'm an 8 and this is my biggest struggle right now. I somehow keep taking on too many tasks and I don't even stop to consider if it's bad for me. I just need things done and I know I can get them done properly haha

[@AbbeyHowe]

yes, this is exactly what I hear from other 8s! it's the knowledge that if you delegate, it won't get done right so you overload your plate.

[@Noah-bp4gu]

@Abbey Howe Exactly! I'm trying to live by the quote "Let other people make mistakes" but it's easier said than done 😅 But someday!

[@rhondabryanthistlethwaite5351]

I’m an 8 that worked herself out. I’m pretty much 100% in or 100% out. Right now I’m out!! ✌🏼

[@cmpicha2934]

@@AbbeyHowe just curious, is this one of the ways type 8 and type 1 are similar because we're both in the gut triad, or is it different for type 1s somehow? This is the part (in addition to not liking slow walkers) that had me wondering if I'm actually an 8 instead of a 1, in spite of my inner critic yelling at me and asking why I was questioning myself on this because I know I'm not an 8 for several reasons. I could see the differences in all the other points though, so in any case this was good for helping me see how we might share similar behaviors being in the same triad, while also showing the differences between our types. Great video!

[@northwind6199]

Great video as usual, but as an 8, your second example actually sounds much closer to Type 3 (picking up the slack and never resting in hopes of earning appreciation from others). And the first example Everything else is spot on tho :D

[@altheaarchives96]

Lolll 3:20 happens everytime in road, me and my mom always have different ways to deal with this. I'm impatient and honks a lot but my mom is a pacifist 😂

[@CassieRaeMcMurtry]

I am an 8 and I feel you have been watching my life. 😆😆😆

[@alexisrash]

ugg. I'm an Ennegram 8, and the conflict thing is SOOOO me! And slow walkers, oh my gosh, no! Not slow walkers! I can't stand them!

[@Andi-y8e]

My boyfriend is an 8w7 ❤

[@crystaldean7668]

SPOT on, I couldn't stop laughing!!

[@justiceforthemissing3690]

Spot on!

[@AbbeyHowe]

woohoo!

[@kornykorhorn]

Beautifully blunt, thank you. 🤗

[@kristinb5073]

There was not nearly enough Lemon in this video.

[@TheBlackAmericana]

I've burned all my bridges! But its very warm here! 😂

[@bobbafett7790]

oh gosh. this is me. i am sending this to my loved ones to forgive their type 8. Slow walkers are a huge pet peeve!!!!!!!

[@booksandcandles3367]

name me a more accurate video than this, i bet you can't.

[@madhatter393]

That's me thru and thru

[@EugenioFilippi]

Very good! Slow walkers are the worst!!!😂😂😂

[@gracie_5]

Your 6 example was actually a sp 8 one

[@nat1XP]

Lemon wont be fooled! My heart

[@sethm7761]

As an eight, you can buzz off with this heywho

[@sethm7761]

Good videos ;)

[@martasgreatlibrary]

As an 8 I confirm that slow walkers belong in jail

[@nasaksiripruksa2966]

Can you make videos about each enneagrams with their instinctual variants 😃?

[@AbbeyHowe]

its on the list!

[@robcorley7565]

Oh yeah I know some eights...yeah eights are interesting 🤔.

[@thatblondgirl21]

OH MY GODDDD WITH THE WALKING SLOW. I HATE THAT!

[@tyleremery7088]

Totally not watching this to help get into the mindset of my 8w9 d&d character...

[@izy2302]

🤣I feel like all of these were relatable for me except #6. I'm a 9

[@AbbeyHowe]

strong wing 8 you got there 😉

[@Marcus_W1x]

Well to be fair, you don't really give any of the types much nuance. I've had a couple of 8w9 friends that were rather cool, but you make them seem like two of my aunts, and most of the pathological narcissists I've known. Most 8s I've known have been bullies, not people that help everyone. Eight's aren't two's.

[@TheRealHelenaDeluca]

...accurate. 😂

[@SurvivalSpec]

U know us 😂

[@leftalone9881]

Slow walkers, what’s it like to not have anywhere you have to be?? I’d love to know