Funny Tweets About Married Life That Perfectly Sum Up Marriage | Memes Time

[@R.Oates7902]

Funniest one yet. Soo true! The Kit-kat one made me lol!😄

[@jonathanwalker8730]

My ex's most exasperating habit was to wake me from deep sleep (and I love my sleep) by repeatedly shaking me and calling, "Jon? Jon? Jon? Are you awake?"

[@deewaters8994]

Been married 43 years so I'm crying with laughter here.

[@insertnamehere9558]

Before watching: **happy single** 🙂 Watching: **scared to be married** After watching: **running away screaming for my life**

[@manojarora2373]

I'm just a teen watching this for comedy in 2020. Anybody else ?

[@delamovies]

What a stupid comment

[@FrostyErica]

If you think this is funny now...wait until you're married. LOL

[@manojarora2373]

@@FrostyErica it is of course I mean haven't you read the title?

[@tylerl4768]

Well I’m a teen watching this for comedy in 2021 HA

[@audreyhogan8285]

Ye

[@adrijagoswami7802]

HOW TO SURVIVE MARRIAGE When you are wrong and your wife is correct admit your mistake When you are correct and your wife is wrong SHUT UP FOR GOD'S SAKE!!!! This is my dad's advice for my elder brothers.. .......

[@dew__drops7844]

Good advice lol

[@you-know-whoofficials9932]

😂😂😂

[@BitterJoyXx]

No, if your wife is wrong, *CALMY* explain to her. People usually start arguments to show they're right, yall just gotta calm and relax and simply talk it out. Balance and equality.

[@adrijagoswami7802]

@@BitterJoyXx I know that is what matured people usually do but my fathers advice was for my moronic brothers who hardly have common sense and would not survive any relationship without stepping on their significant other's toes and pissing them off constantly they have a short temper so........ I personally hope that people talk and sort out their problems without yelling profanities at each other It seems to work on me and my bf as well as my parents and quite a few people around me so hope is still there .

[@sharylhobbs998]

Thank you! Thank you! Needed those laughs today (1/7/21) more than ever today. I haven’t been married or partnered for a very long time, but they were still so relevant to my experiences. Marriage is wonderful (ly funny) when you’re lucky enough to find the right people, and there’s nothing like sharing a good laugh to help secure the partnership. 😂😂

[@lillianramberg9088]

Haha I loved the gummy bear one

[@sherrycanon7582]

😂 very cute. Life is like a bag of Kit Kats. You never know if someone is going to catch you eating them!🤣 No failure to please when talking chocolate.

[@beautifulrecovery2337]

You really pulled some of this evidence from 2012 true married fashion 👏👏👏

[@antm64]

I burst out laughing at every one of these screen shots!! Love the coffee analogy...spot on! Were I not married, complete with 2 kids, I might not have understood the reality of each and every posting. This is the most entertaining video I've seen on KZbin!! Thank you!

[@darylcheshire1618]

glad I never married - that one about the wrong way to put the milk in the fridge struck a chord.

[@BitterJoyXx]

They probably put it on the top shelf like a weirdo

[@sallygomez8799]

"I'll take 9 tacos"...😂😂😂😂😂😂

[@michaeltowler2632]

I know this not a tweet but I've always liked Russel Crowe's quote from in a film, " marriage is buying a house with someone you hate"

[@BitterJoyXx]

Than don't marry them if you hate them

[@uaher6841]

That tent one is a fantastic idea! Lol 😂

[@beth8775]

Or Ikea furniture

[@uaher6841]

@@beth8775 lmao oh so true!

[@haneen2073]

4:50 If my dad woke my mom up for that reason he wouldn’t be here today

[@dancingghostgirl2291]

Kitties are worth it though

[@tedjaromin2421]

Golden rule of marriage is husband needs permission to be correct

[@tedjaromin2421]

Just make sure you start every sentence with the words I'm sorry and end it with the words yes dear

[@MessianicMermaid]

There are actually some women out there who believe in traditional submission, showing respect to their husbands, and raising respectful and polite children. We're few and far between, but we do still exist. Don't lose hope. :)

[@unknown9901]

@@MessianicMermaid You can still have *mutual* respect in a relationship and raise good natured children, who are actually allowed to have their own opinions and still have a brain to think for yourself none of what you talked about is submission it’s just common decency that you show respect to *eachother* in a healthy relationship. Don’t let your children be jerks or crappy people, though respect or polite doesn’t mean mindless they should still be able to discuss things and have their own opinions which they support and aren’t not labeled disrespectful for defending them. The only traditional submission is sexism that one sex is lower than another. I repeat none of what u said is submission it’s just common decency. You’re an embarrassment to females.

[@MessianicMermaid]

@@unknown9901 🙄 For you to be able to comprehend what true submission is, you would have to actually pick up the texts that cover it (i.e. the Bible) and read it in its proper context and in its entirety. You can't just read a few verses that you pulled out of the middle and make generalizations and assumptions. Until you have studied the texts as thoroughly as I have, don't insult my intelligence. Nowhere in the Bible does it say that women are worth less than men or that they are not allowed to make their thoughts and opinions known. It says that both sexes are of equal inherent value to God and that each sex has an important job/role in life. Just because men and women have different traditional roles doesn't mean that one sex is lower than another nor does it mean that the traditional role is to be the woman's ONLY role. To give one Biblical example of such, Esther was a traditional woman who fulfilled her role to be submissive to God and husband and to raise a godly family, but she was also the queen and ruler of her land alongside King Xerxes and risked her own life to save the lives of her people. Next time, you might want to read something before attempting to insult me, but I'm not really insulted, anyway. If a modern-day, "anything you can do, I can do better" feminist (most of whom seem to have no problem aborting a child for the sake of having a career) tells me I am an embarrassment to females, I must be doing something right. ;)

[@MessianicMermaid]

@Parvika Singh Thank you! That is very much appreciated. :)

[@priscillamoore5736]

The "fancy socks & night shirt with no food stains" for seducing her husband literally had me laughing out loud. The baby poop one was cute, too.

[@guessimintoblondeandsaltybrats]

There was actually a kid crying in the background when I read that kid crying in the street one lmao 😂😂😂

[@carolali4503]

Hilarious! Just love this stuff!!!

[@ruthadams9911]

Laughing until I was crying!!!🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@melissawalker5723]

2:27 is funny. 😆

[@tinaolagun4056]

Why do Twitter have the funniest posts? Where Facebook and Instagram? 🤔

[@HopeUnquenchable]

Laughed so hard @2:43😂

[@billnye69]

I've been with my wife for 16yrs and can relate to only 2 things on the list......we live in separate countries though.

[@kidsscheid5310]

There’s a wrong way to put milk back in the fridge?!

[@seleneyue]

The handle facing in

[@fostermomjudy6962]

@@seleneyue what sort of psychopath would do such a thing?!? 🤣😂😉

[@TamaraScott-t9s]

The handle facing out

[@nqobilesibisi3544]

don't you die on me 😂😂😂

[@sloppygangsta4538]

To all the wives: 🤜🤛 -- damn we are GOOD

[@1toshi32]

2:09 Seems fair 4:31 I can totally relate 9:18 Is that him or her

[@Eat_Zzz_Play]

Glad people have marriages like these 😬

[@sakshisrivastava7586]

That was so funny 😂😂😍😍😍

[@TheCat72850]

So funny....and Grant Imahara (sp?) has some on here. What a loss!

[@quintinstephens2573]

Right fair bit of man-bashing in this one...

[@jazzrat2000]

My wife and I are nearly 70. Kit Kat's always take preference.

[@kittykaos3725]

Love this!!😂

[@fairenough7984]

7:50 🤣🤣🤣

[@karenharris3808]

you actually mean there a wrong way to put milk in the fridge? ha that is new.

[@18sixty45]

Always funny 😃

[@Not_Sure-2020]

Kit Kat or playing with yourself...sorry but at this point I think you're gonna have to share something! ;)

[@enakshiparua836]

0:35 😂😂😂😆😆😆

[@lilliyroseomonuwa4416]

Oh my godd

[@enakshiparua836]

2:18 😂😂😂😂

[@dffulmer1]

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@665Kattt]

Never marry!!!

[@richardbossman9875]

Perfectly sums up toxic wives is a more accurate title.

[@chriskirsten8221]

Marriage is all about the wife being always right and he husband being bashed constanty for being dumb and doing - literally everything - wrong

[@mylist0song]

Well...

[@cardinalfanable]

Amen

[@Intelwinsbigly]

It is such a shame other men can't just become gay and escape this.

[@Teddy31976]

You copied this whole video!!!

[@MS6870]

wait what?

[@mgrootemaat]

Really sad if you feel the need to share stuff with people you don't know, at 3 am....seriously...

[@sagbrady8414]

Maybe there was a time difference...but then again its 5:00 somewhere

[@alaskachick7315]

Some of us have weird schedules. I work for a 24-7-365 business and I work all three shifts every week. Unfortunately, we can't all live in your beautiful world where 3 a.m. is off limits for posting comments. Oh, and when you have children, you'll change your tune. I used to stare at a painting on our wall while doing the 2 a.m. feedings but that was before the internet. Dollars to donuts you'll be online watching youtube videos when your wife insists that it's your turn to feed the baby in the middle of the night. And you might feel the need to share your opinion.

[@cliffordbodine5834]

All about women trying to appear dominant and weak men being obsequious.

[@Xiallaci]

I know right? Cringes.

[@mylist0song]

So you recognized yourself then.

[@cliffordbodine5834]

@@mylist0song No, I'm a woman.

[@dabi-6686]

8th lol

[@Bambammbi]

We wife will always right. You got no right to argue when u just leave all the work to us. House chore . You don’t play by the rule well, so why not follow us??? Stop making a damn mess when I already clean it. Husband: ahh sorry I won’t do this again For next 24 hours Wife:IM GONNA KICK YOU OUt RIGHT THIS MOMENT!PUT THAT SOCK IN THAT BASKET RIGHT NOW. This is the 10x I’ve said this. When I hit 11x, you gonna leave this place Husband:Chill Wife: OH YEAH? CHILL? GET THE FR OUT HUSBAND scarred for life and promised to not do that again. But 2 days later: Wife: the damn jean! I’m gonna set it on fire!

[@mrunali3306]

3:17?

[@ananya2445]

The good news is that they just got a penguin

[@mrunali3306]

@@ananya2445 thanks for explaining