Can INFPs find love?

[@nawfalourimech8974]

I gave up and just reached the state of mind where minding your own garden feels great and satisfying :)

[@karistone1297]

That’s so true Matt. I heard someone once say instead of the question ‘Yes but can I live with them?’, it should be ‘Can I live without them?’. Overly dramatic perhaps, but you get the point. Wonderfully positive video, and very helpful, thanks!

[@GeekPsychology]

That’s exactly the question. I often remind myself of the lyrics, “don’t it always seem to go that you don’t know what you’ve got till it’s done”

[@tg_5565]

I almost didn’t watch this because I felt like it didn’t apply to me because I’m happily married, but I’m so glad I did. Awesome explanations and information to apply to many situations in life. This also made me think about how I used to operate in the past and gave me some cool insight. Thank you!

[@GeekPsychology]

I'm so glad you took a chance on it! I’d love to know more about the insights you got. If you’re not comfortable sharing here, [e-mail] or on Discord would be cool ^^

[@tg_5565]

@@GeekPsychology Firstly, I really like the format you used…easy to follow and digest. The biggest and most important takeaway that I got was that the “commitment hack” can be applied to all areas of life. I have been struggling with my commitment to my art practice, and this clarified some things regarding my work and my relationship with it. Can I live without art? No. So I need to use the very same principles that I use in nurturing human relationships and apply them to my work. I hope I’m being clear, lol. Also, it really struck me that I have been in an Fi-Si loop for a very long time and it has been sapping my energy and strength. I’ve been keeping myself “safe” and not letting myself explore and that is a soul-killing, to be perfectly honest. Thank you for asking 💗 I hope this helps!😊

[@etherealdreamerart]

If INFP Matt-kun can find his soulmate, any INFP I believe can. 😊🥰✨️

[@GeekPsychology]

lol I agree!

[@etherealdreamerart]

@@GeekPsychology 😂😋

[@Haku_na8]

He seems like a faaar healthier INFP so I'm not sure about that lol

[@raincrowley9917]

Thank you, Matt, you are making the world a better place for us INFPs. I didn't think I would ever settle down with one person, one reason was that I didn't think anyone would love me once they truly knew me. I wanted children, so I started looking at men from a different perspective. I came to the realization that few of the ones I was attracted to had the emotional maturity to be a good father' Which got me thinking about what I needed to do about myself to become a good mother. I decided to travel to Greece, a country where I didn't speak the language, in a sort of 'sink or swim' approach. I needed to know if I could take charge, organize myself, face up to challenging social situations without support, and find my inner strength (I was also fascinated by Greece and its history). Long story short, I found my love while I was working on myself rather than looking for romance. We were close friends while I was saving up for my trip and got together a week after I got back from overseas, a more mature, more confident me (I was only away 3 months). Six weeks later got engaged, then married seven months after that. Been together 30 years now :) Yes fellow INFPs, if a relationship is what you really want, you can do it and be good at it. Maybe not in the stereotypical sense that many judge by, our house is rarely tidy, there are art supplies all over the place, we have far too many dogs and horses, and the property is a mass of unfinished projects. But my husband is a hard worker and our bills get paid because direct debit is awesome. I may forget to do the shopping, but I'm great at creating a meal out of not much, until I can get to it.

[@ebnest123]

I always say no, but now I realize as a INFP 1) we are not alone and 2) we can find love

[@tasnimhasan2704]

Thank you.This video is truly both inspiring and practical..

[@ll_Scholastica_ll]

Thanks for sharing lol. Informative. 🙏🏻 👍🏻

[@GeekPsychology]

Happy to hear that ^^

[@aknightofcamelot]

After being in a relationship with a covert narcissist I no longer believe in a soulmate.

[@GeekPsychology]

Sorry to hear that :( But there are 7.541 billion people out there… don’t let a few be generalized as everyone. Now, you’re more aware of what kind of people to avoid (and the signs of them). I dated a girl who tricked me into dating her, lied constantly about some really horrible things in order to keep me attached, and tried to ruin several friendships. Wild stuff.

[@aknightofcamelot]

@@GeekPsychology Sounds familiar. INFPs have a sacred inner world, and these types of people desecrate it because of their lies; it takes time to recover.

[@GeekPsychology]

@aknightofcamelot :( come to think of it, I didn’t start dating my wife until about 7 years later.

[@aknightofcamelot]

@@GeekPsychology I hope she's a saint!

[@peachesandpoets]

I still stupidly believed after a covert but then fell right into the jaws of a malignant. Two years later and I'm still healing what took like 6 months to break. (I figured out what narcissism is by then, and got away strategically). I'm sooo just focusing on me now. Luckily as an INFP I'm all good in isolation 😂

[@Adhdorwhatever22]

So do we lack empathy because we think of ourselves and not the person?

[@VenaSerion]

Man Sherman geek i love you brother but sometimes your fool of it bro, stop, your married, you had the right environment bro, so stop, some of us don't have that.

[@GeekPsychology]

I wasn’t married before I got married. :D I also moved across the world. I also intentionally pushed myself to leave my house several times a week so I could learn to talk to people. For many years, as I said (I think I kept it in the video), I thought I was poison and that anyone foolish enough to date me was going to be hurt. Which lead to a lot of bad thoughts about having no choice but to be single for the rest of my life and suicidal thoughts. Didn’t think I’d make it past 30. Never intended to. There are many factors. But it is possible for all. I 100% believe it.

[@mitthrawnuruodo1730]

So he found love but he shouldn’t talk about how to find love? What’s the point of this comment?

[@VenaSerion]

@@mitthrawnuruodo1730 the point is, he clearly had better chances and a better environment, he doesn't understand that, some of us, have harsher environment that he had never been experienced. where people are just cruel and don't care what's so ever, about another person, he has no idea what that's like. So what he should do is be honest with us about the difference of environments. Then proceeds, he shouldn't give people false hope. Cause he is setting them up on a path of heartbreak and major disappointment. I'm an infp who is now unhealthy, because of such and ignorance we'll, so be careful and beware the waters are dangerous. 😕

[@mitthrawnuruodo1730]

@@VenaSerion I’m an infp who was in a bad environment. Dad was an alcoholic drug user and I grew up in a poor area. Know what I did? I got out. Don’t use your environment as an excuse, and don’t discredit someone else because “they have it better than me.” This is just a way to keep feeling sorry for yourself and do something to improve your self and your environment. Don’t blame him because you are an unhealthy infp. Don’t get mad at him because he doesn’t address EVERYTHING. His info is still applicable

[@GeekPsychology]

@VenaSerion look up Sean Stephenson and tell be about all of the advantages he had. Yes, he’s only one person. But he did it. And there are countless others. Yes I had some advantages. And I also busted my ass to improve myself. For 12 years before I let my wife I studied, practiced, and spent a lot of money (definitely $10,000+) trying to figure out how to talk to people. So many awkward situations. Because I wanted it that badly. So, I hope some of those lessons in the video help you too ^^