Getting things done, avoiding comparison, knowing your limits

Mother of ten, blogger, author, and one of my real life friends, Abbie from M is for Mama, is back on the podcast chatting with me about being an intentional mother in an increasingly frantic culture. As mothers, there are so many negative messages coming at us from all directions highlighting the burdens of motherhood without offering us hope or direction. Abbie’s countercultural message of embracing motherhood as a gift and calling from God is a breath of fresh air. Join us as we highlight many of the mindset shifts that have given us freedom and joy in our own journeys as mothers of many.
In this episode, we cover:
- All about Abbie’s 45 day trip to Europe with her 10 kids
- Feeling less alone in motherhood and moving forward out of the difficult places
- Finding freedom from the shame of not being able to keep up with everything on your plate
- Shifting your mindset around being interrupted by kids when trying to get things done
- Adjusting your expectations about what your house should look like
- Taking appropriate responsibility in parenting without succumbing to fear and control
- Keeping perspective about your capacity in different seasons of motherhood
- Avoiding the trap of comparing yourself to what everyone else is doing
Thank you to our sponsors!
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ABOUT ABBIE
Abbie is a happy wife, homeschooling mama to ten rad kids, bestselling author, blogger, fitness instructor, and reigning family Nertz champion. But most importantly, she’s a Bible-believing Christian who desires to know God and make Him known. She lives by the motto “hard is not the same thing as bad” and loves encouraging women to dig deep in the everyday trials of motherhood for the treasures of joy and growth that are there in abundance if we’re only willing to look. She, her husband Shaun, and their double handful of children live in the Piney Woods of East Texas.
RESOURCES
M is for Mama by Abbie Halberstadt: misformama.net/book
Hard is Not the Same Thing as Bad by Abbie Halberstadt: misformama.net/hard-is-not-th...
M is for Mama Podcast: misformama.net/podcast-platforms
The Penny Reward System eBook: misformama.net/product/the-pe...
The Gentleness Challenge eBook: misformama.net/product/the-ge...
CONNECT
Abbie Halberstadt of M is for Mama
Website: misformama.net/
Podcast: misformama.net/podcast-platforms
Instagram: / m.is.for.mama
Facebook: / misformama
Pinterest: / _saved
Lisa Bass of Farmhouse on Boone
Blog: www.farmhouseonboone.com/
KZbin: / farmhouseonboone
Instagram: / farmhouseonboone
TikTok: / farmhouseonboone
Facebook: / farmhouseonboone
Pinterest: / _created
Join us in the Simple Farmhouse Life Facebook community: / 748012922264552
GET MORE FROM THIS EPISODE
Listen to this podcast episode: podcasters.spotify.com/pod/sh...
View full show notes on the blog: simplefarmhouselifepodcast.co...

[@mountaingirl8124]

Good stuff ladies! As a mama to 9 (including 9 month old twins) and running a 40-acre farm and homeschooling, I can honestly say that there is WAY TOO MUCH COMPARISON going on in cyber world and God has us all on different journeys. We have to stop ladies. I gave up milking my cow this past year after adopting our last three babies. I miss it, but it’s what I had to do for the EMOTIONAL health of myself and family. We believe the lie that we can “do it all” and we are killing our adrenals, amongst other things, thinking that we can and we can’t. To everything there is a season. ❤️ God bless you both in your ministries on these platforms.

[@meggo6673]

“Everywhere you go, you’re just a lot.”

[@NikkiSchumacherOfficial]

People treat us like a lot with 3. 😅

[@brookidy]

Agree! Same

[@lilyseestheworld7865]

Even one kid is too much for an egoist. It is however what our society is mainly made of.

[@NathalieVA56]

“ performance, based parenting is fear-based parenting…” WHOA!!! That hit me hard

[@vintagebeliever5023]

Thank you for introducing me to another wonderful woman. I am an empty-nester yet I glean what I can to encourage my two stay home mommy daughters. ❤

[@fourdayhomestead2839]

As a nana & great nana, this podcast will also help me to encourage my oldest. She's a momma of 12 (2 that are grown) homeschooled kids. She works from home & earned her collage degrees (3!) while doing it all.

[@rachellebrooke4614]

Such a great idea

[@Simplefarmhouselife]

Wonderful!

[@brittanykeith9561]

I really just feel like we need a Lisa Abbie podcast lol the world would he a better place 🤩😁

[@amandathode4540]

I gave up all the social media except you tube. I only listen to homestead/homemaking videos. I’ve improved In my housekeeping and I’m a lot more productive and calm and that’s working 8 hours outside the home.

[@Marianne.5683]

This is a breath of fresh air 🤍 I’m almost 30 with a 2 year old and a 4 month old and recently had to turn off the firehouse as you say. Abbie when you were speaking about experiencing postpartum rage after having Shiloh I felt that so personally- my daughters name is Shiloh. This stage is a challenge. So much grace and wisdom here!

[@dominikaestell2641]

Thanks so much for the encouragement! As a very pregnant mom of a 3yo and a 16mo, I’m in a very different season of life but this podcast helped me to realize I don’t have to do it all now and it’s ok.

[@mommy3950]

I only made it through 10 minutes. Planning a trip to Europe is not relatable for me. I’m just trying to survive and keep my kids fed

[@Alexa-qn6ke]

You can skip to around the 20 min mark

[@carleyprater2440]

I think people forget that some people have paper plates we carry things on, but others have ceramic plates. When some get too many opportunities on their paper plate, the plate starts to fold and the items start the fall and crumble and causes panic. Other with ceramic plates can easily carry multiple items, and even stack them! Both are okay, but recognizing the plate you have is the important aspect.

[@BellyBurly87]

I love this

[@The123missmary]

Wow! One of my favorite guests. SO encouraging. Great reminder to wipe bottoms for the glory of the Lord! 😅😂

[@anbrasuell]

20:26 is where they get on topic, skip there unless you wanna talk about europe ♡

[@kbkb3358]

I hear you on the travel!!!! We live in Australia and to get back to the USA for a visit our flights were 11hrs and then a layover and then 13.5/14hrs and then after that we had a 5hr drive to where we needed to go. After going through customs! It was completely exhausting! that trip is not for the faint of heart 😅

[@LindsayChinainSimpson]

I have been loving your podcast because it has helped me discover other women that I feel like I can relate and look up to! I absolutely LOVE Abbie’s mission of helping other women/moms relate without being coddled. I feel like that has been something I have been craving! I appreciate the people I have talked to who help me feel seen but I just want to roll my eyes when all I’m being told is “take it easy, just wing it, etc.” sometimes I just want to receive a kick in the bum and be told I can do this and I just need to woman up 😂 is it that weird? 😅

[@sarahbarnwell5296]

I have literally listened to this 3 times. Such RICH and helpful information in here. Thank you!

[@kingdomhealthwellness]

This was so so good wise. I loved the discussion. I found myself speaking out loud answering and agreeing. 😅 It was such a blessing hanging out with you amazing women.

[@Simplefarmhouselife]

Glad you enjoyed it!

[@Jenandpipsqueeks]

So so good - thoroughly enjoyed this episode ❤

[@ErikasHomeRefresh]

I love your podcasts so much, thank you!

[@annababcock3948]

This was an enjoyable podcast, thank you and so relatable. I appreciate you both addressing the comparison trap we can easily fall into. It is such a mind game. God help us get the victory in those moments!

[@mirandaventer6537]

Oh thank you só much, I needed to hear all of this. Such a blessing to me.

[@MrsWatters369]

Enjoyed listening to this podcast. I learned I am not in your demographic as a 54 yo Nana. But we can learn from each other no matter our ages or family situation. I found you through Cass the Clutterbug podcast. Way back in 1982-85 I had a sourdough starter and made bread regularly…life got busy and I let it go. Now Married for 36 years with 3 adult children, and 1 granddaughter and many years later …. Empty nesting made me want to revisit making sweets and bread. So I am following your instructions and now I have “Martha”, my new sourdough starter. During this podcast I finished baking your sourdough shortbread cookies. Delicious!!! Thank you for sharing your recipes with us and your farmhouse. Best wishes for success ❤

[@Simplefarmhouselife]

I love to hear it! Sourdough is a skill you have for life once you master it...glad to hear you are picking it up again.

[@jerisharpe906]

I really think these 2 women are down to earth & really great people.

[@brittanystanton4733]

All my friends and relatives believe that my house magazine ready, but it isn't. I just have this habit of cleaning as I go, and a daily routine to reset our most used spaces (kitchen, bathroom, bed) and weekly routine to care for floors, linens, and through cleaning. My husband is naturally messy and a bit sloppy, but he can clean of anything in the house, and I am a perfectionist and visual disorder stresses me. We don't have children yet, so I take the opportunity to build the habits that allows us to have a neat home that is not magazine ready to balance both of our personalities.

[@gramcracker1616]

Great podcast, ladies! A wonderfully biblical worldview is presented so graciously. TY

[@rebekahmccaul]

Excellent, one of my favourite episodes so far. Thank you. 💓💓

[@marieallgyer9194]

I enjoy your podcast it seems like I always learn something and I'm 51 have 2 teenagers 3 20yr olds still at home and 2 grands a daughter and son in law 30 hrs away

[@Sonyacita]

❤❤❤❤❤ I’m only halfway through and have to pause to say, THANK YOU. I have had such judgment of myself for not having an easier time and your discussion of the difference when everyone is 3 and under was extremely clarifying. I have 2, 1 and another coming soon and I feel pretty confused about how anyone has more than 3 kids! But I am in ways picturing you and your guests with 10 babies instead of a household of varying abilities. Getting the book!

[@kimc.3104]

This was goood!! A collaboration of great mothers; homemakers; entrepreneurs - and a thoughtful; honest; relatable reflection of these topics. Thank you! Yes Abbie you must spend time with your kids -- I see your dance routines with your son on IG - they are heart-melting.

[@annaantonenko2032]

Love love love this! You're doing God's work by sharing such quality content 🙌

[@kendratai]

I have M is for mama on my side table and I couldn't get a read on where the book was going and if I was going to like it. I knew nothing about the author and now I want to keep reading because this sounds exactly like what I was hoping for!!

[@sarahlandreth1748]

I have an 18 month old and a 3 month old and i tell myself several times a day that its just a season 😂

[@LemonLimeJuiceBarrell]

Thank you so much for this upload. I have been watching your content for a long time and honestly I look at you as something of a virtual mentor. I am pregnant with my second child now and my husband and I have chosen the path of biblical living/parenting as well. I don’t know many other moms personally who practice this life or who even understand why I do so it’s so nice to know that there are other women out there who have the same goals as I do for my family and who are willing to share their experiences and life advice. I have learned so much from you…I now bake sourdough every week and my family loves it.

[@Amgirl03]

Amein! Thank you both ❤

[@hannahjacksonayers7187]

I love your podcast and I loved the book M is for Momma. I’ve been reading it for two months… I’ve reread certain chapters bc they are so convicting and encouraging❤️

[@darlamercer4078]

The seasons in which you thrive are the ones you seek God's will first. You will look back and see God's hands in your life. Keep seeking God!

[@peggyon1]

My concern about these moms/dads is do they spend one-on-one time with their children? Raising children, IMO, is not only about 'logistics' or always being in a group. Each child needs to be seen individually.

[@Simplefarmhouselife]

When you stay home and lead this kind of life it is to have the opportunity to spend quality time with your children....our lives are built around it.

[@astorytoldhere]

This podcast was FIRE!! Great job, mommas!😊

[@Simplefarmhouselife]

Thank you!!

[@sues6847]

When our children are allowed to participate it also really helps children. Cooking in all forms is math and science in action. Trying a new recipe? Ask your child to read it to you if they are old enough to learn or can read all ready. This is a good time to teach the principal of measuring twice and cutting once. I have always worked outside the home and I can tell you that it's 100% true that a lot of parents do everything for their children then send them out into the world without basic skills like cooking, cleaning and doing laundry...you can also turn those activities into math and science lessons. My children attended public school however they also enjoyed home school without even knowing it. None of them took an interest in the garden as children but there are so many important lessons to learn there as well...math, science, chemistry along with work ethic, confidence and financial lessons. What some call interruptions, I call teaching moments. Looking back, I'm happy knowing that my children knew how to cook for and clean up after themselves and do their own laundry. If you include your child in your everyday chores you will never regret taking that extra few minutes the chore takes when you realize what a gift that is to them in the future when they have to do for themselves.

[@glennarichards2933]

Excellent

[@HannahElaineStudio]

Wow, did I need this. God spoke so powerfully through both of you. Thank you for equipping and cheering us moms on❤

[@Simplefarmhouselife]

So glad!

[@teagranola]

Thank you for this! I am 27, with 2 kids going on 3. 9:30 pm and I am mopping the house wondering if I'll ever figure out what works for keeping things going smoothly. This was great.

[@Simplefarmhouselife]

You will! It gets easier the longer you parent and keep your home.

[@chiaraferri5800]

Ciao, è molto interessante quello di cui parlate anche se non è facile seguire una conversazione così lunga in inglese... Comunque condivido la gentilezza in casa esattamente come fuori, grazie a entrambe

[@rachellebrooke4614]

Fantastic podcast

[@Simplefarmhouselife]

Thanks for listening

[@jerisharpe906]

Instead of knocking this couple for their expensive home, NOBODY gave them their home, they earned it & built it themselves. Be happy for them, they are living the life they want, they're not asking anyone to givec them anything. Why are you jealous for this family. They see the goal they want to achieve & are working hard to obtain their goals.

[@ahall003]

M is for money. Not enough that her husband is a software engineer. What a joke. Her property is worth more then 1 million with 14 bathrooms.

[@vintagebeliever5023]

I am sure they worked hard to get there. Jealousy does not look good on anyone. 😊

[@lizwright8613]

Frankly if they built a $1million house with their own hands that's pretty impressive.