Girl on Girl Crime: How to Spot a Hating Frenemy!!!

[@HorizonSun100]

A frenemy will insult you to your face and then tell you they're just playing.

[@Shineldove]

Also be careful who you marry. Your husband can be your frenemy 👀

[@vfree4579]

Already experienced that 13 years women must be careful to know the signs of a jealous man especially in an intimate relationship they will slowly and under minded leg chip at your self-esteem as well as your femininity. My ex-husband told me I was masculine and I was really feeling it but then I became confused I'm back to myself now.

[@christielove9000]

Yes Ma'am, Most definitely. I Agree with you wholeheartedly. I've had that unfortunate experience. It is not a good feeling at all. I never want to be with anyone but feel so alone at the same time Ever again.

[@christielove9000]

@Christina Masemo Yes,Yes. Them too. I've had that Experience also. Can make you feel like the Enemy. They were unwelcoming. Never got a good Connection at all. Honestly, don't think they wanted to establish a relationship

[@shawneegirl1980]

Wow....

[@stellabellafontay9366]

Dang! 🤯

[@questionresearch8721]

What I find funny about the fenemies, they act like people can't see what they are really about.

[@CiaobellaAmour]

Question & Research exactly ‼️

[@mwright0428]

Facts! We can see right through you, which is why we deal with you in doses and watch who we tell our business to.

[@cherylmcleod6088]

They normally believe they're better and smarter than everyone else...so in turn they have convinced their selves that no one can see through their schemes and plots

[@cherylmcleod6088]

@@AmaLoveGoddessTV exactly

[@questionresearch8721]

@Pamelafountain60 jones so true!

[@Adollnamed_Catharine]

The main reason I have no friends now, 😂don’t have time for the imaginary competition

[@aminah761]

Kat Doll me too

[@curli-lettey4319]

The unnecessary competition. when you pay that irrelevant stuff dust,they seem to get mad like they WANT to go up against you!

[@wilmatouw4397]

yes imaginary!, they think you see them as a rival as well, when it has never crossed your mind since you are friends.

[@ka8155]

Same here

[@stephrose5410]

Success attracts frenemies

[@jenkinscourtney11gmailcom]

They don't want you to progress in life, relationships or on the job.

[@stephrose5410]

@@jenkinscourtney11gmailcom and that's a shame only on them and not you, so win anyways ;)

[@lexyred6289]

had a frenemy who called me bougie for having a certain taste, another time when i was giving her a ride and was parking I was using my backup camera and she told me I was showing off, then i got into a masters program and soon after she dissapeared. I should have known from the beginning she was a hater

[@lovejonez7286]

Girllll I lost all my friends once I started my business

[@tmiller7755]

As soon as i met my boyfriend my frenemys started showing face. When i was with my dusty ex everything was great but when i met a man who cashed out on me frequently, takes me on trips and provides, everything started going south. I knew it was a real issue when one day he called me on my much break and told me to go to a nail salon where he had already had my services paid for, and then when i got back to my desk there were roses and other cute little gifts. When i told my “friends” their response was, “that’s it”.... meanwhile all they’re receiving from these n words is dick and a headache. I’ve learned that you just need to keep your eyes open and don’t be afraid to illuminate ppl no matter how many years you’ve had with them. If my happiness and wellbeing is an insult to you, then i don’t need you in my life. I shouldn’t feel like my friends are plotting on my downfall.

[@loveinautumn3978]

Lol@ dick and headache 🤣🤣

[@lamaridechambao2105]

Damn it exactly what's happening to me

[@tercial]

Also Frenemies hate when you stand up to them when they insult you through back hand compliments or make a joke trying to make you feel bad.

[@carolellamuch9571]

It's so sad that women are competitive when it comes to men I think that's where you really see the frenemies

[@SagRising19]

Indeed! They're competitive with you..even with the "perception" of you having a man lol. These women are dangerous.

[@bonvivant3704]

Lauren CW yep😩

[@elizabethowens8548]

@@laurencw731 or lose or gain weight. Start taking care of yourself. Make pretty your environment set boundaries foster hobbies ect. They can't stand observing the void were they are not the center. My white community is riddled with these bitchy beckys.

[@elizabethowens8548]

@@laurencw731 totally true. One thing i knew that my frienemy cannot know where I work

[@estheradao]

True thar

[@ceemac304]

I have a masters in spotting a frienenemy. I dropped most. Took me some time. I am getting there.

[@elizabethowens8548]

I always tried to give them the benefit of the doubt. No more. I think these people can be more damaging than a dusty

[@avgonyma1]

Same

[@gh2543]

@cee mac couldn't agree with you more! It's so sad though! Women can't truly support other women success without being malicious, and envious. In my opinion, i think people who become frenemies have low self-esteem themselves. So, they try to sabotage other people's lives to feel better about themselves.

[@khaliahferguson3532]

cee mac just realized today that I have about 4 that needs distance.

[@user-mw6wp6ce4p]

I need to get this masters. I always learn too late.

[@vanessaharris6341]

I sent this to my 24 year old daughter. She's sweet, smart and beautiful. She's working on her masters and I'm a proud mama for sure. She's told me a few slick things that her one of her friends and female coworkers have said. The hate is real ladies!!!

[@samiawilliams151]

What did they say?

[@SweetestGyrl]

24 with her masters 🥳

[@tya4662]

Sometimes your frenemies can be family

[@sheissuchalady9782]

I keep all Women and so called friends at arm length when I was in my 20s an older woman said to me if you get one true friend in life your blessed most people are not rooting for you especially if they believe you’re doing better than them 🤷🏾‍♀️

[@taghazoutmoon5031]

That's why my only real friend is more successful than me. I admire her, but I noticed my frenemies that are losers envy me for my financial stability. Even though I'm suffering emotionally from a bad breakup. They always encouraged me to break up with him and when I did, I was alone. Only my successful friend stopped by.

[@estheradao]

My mum always says to me: “In this life, real friends are rare. And even if you have friends, stop telling them all your business. I learned this when I was in a restaurant one year ago and my “friend” was gossiping about me and my disease to her cousin and her friends...I learned also that as a BW, non BW will not have the decency to consider you when they’ll win in life, they love you only for help, like a half ass friendship.”

[@MaiMai-ys4yg]

I lost sooooo many “friends” and my life has been better. I think a lot of people wanted me to stay being the drunk,loud, crazy , promiscuous friends. Always in need of advice. But since I got myself together a lot of people left my life and it’s great. I have a beautiful home, in the suburbs, in shape, married with a kid. Great credit, savings and a full fridge. Traveling. Date nights . And a lot are stuck doing what they did 10 years ago…still. The less “friends” the better. I don’t even have social media

[@43cassy]

🎉🙌🏿

[@LillyVibes]

Hahahahaha and a full fridge

[@LevelUP84]

I got my eyebrows microbladed, my colleague friend wouldn’t stop bringing it up in front of people and bringing up how what an expensive waste of money it was and wanted people to side with her and chastise me. I just smiled, laughed and said yes, I’m expensive and my upkeep and good looks are worth investing in.

[@athenaquispe]

❤ 😔

[@vlee7217]

I cut off my friends. Currently in the process of rebuilding my social circle. It's not easy but worth it

[@iloveplatano]

First frenemy I've ever had was my mother. She used to treat me like her competition lol.

[@boldandcourageous4176]

That makes my heart sad.

[@daniellegriffin988]

Same girl, its sad because I can’t even tell her my achievements because I know she’ll be jealous when all I want is for her to be proud.

[@Lovelyelizabeth12]

yariiyaritza My mother too. Smdh

[@amberc2839]

I feel your pain Sis. That is my story as well. I hope that you were able to take that energy and fuel it for a healthy life

[@pangeleta1967]

yariiyaritza Mine too🤷🏽‍♀️

[@newladyleaf9810]

I wish there was a safe space for women who are leveling up. I realized yesterday that I can’t talk to any of my family members, who are my closest friends. There should be a private group on LSA or something.

[@NaturallyVintage]

NewLady Leaf from my experience... and trust me I’ve tried everything for the from talking to my best friends & family to finding other girls who are supposedly on the same path to leveling up.... you have to level up alone. Yes even other women who are “leveling up” will be greener than emeralds at YOUR glow and become distracted instead of focusing on their own come up. I am hopeful that once i reach the level I want to be ill find like minded women -already- there but I’m not holding my breath. Just trying to hold my coins.

[@kitsontuli2713]

Buy a diary, cause such does not exist. There's a group of ladies who started a ladies club in my hometown, but I still see alot of cracks within such social clubs.

[@NaturallyVintage]

Kitso Ntuli right. When i was sugaring...i I hung out with other sugar babies who provided receipts of their success so there was no doubt in my mind that they were about the glow up. They all cliqued up as it seems women can’t help but to do and shortly started becoming frenemies.

[@celenesanchez6239]

Read books, articles, listen to pods cast and people like who give advice like Chloe. Be careful who you share your energy, and listen to your intuition. If you share something about the feminine energy, and they become uncomfortable and passive aggressive don’t share anymore. They aren’t really open to those ideas. I learn a lot listening to Chlore, and a redhead lady in KZbin, plus Louis Haye. Sometimes we have to walk alone in our transformation. It gives us a chance to see who is there for us and who isn’t.

[@morningsunshine0216]

NewLady Leaf I agree. I’m leveling up and don’t really have anyone to talk to.

[@k.e.5886]

I’ve had to learn to enjoy my own company. The old folks used to say “You don’t have no friends” now I know what they meant

[@vt-yp7yq]

Yes! Being boujee keeps those who don't have your best interest at heart away.

[@ChangedandChosen]

Absolutely!

[@curtistinemiller4646]

Don't fear the Enemy who attacks you,fear the friend who hugs you....

[@ZawadiBirya]

I didn't know that the glow up was going to expose frenemies but the exodus has began. Some are super surprising because I think they're so much prettier but oh well...

[@ebony_momlife]

i laugh at frenimies because they can hide with their words but their body language usually reveals them. They are happy for you and in the same breath try to insult your progress in the form of a joke. and ladies be careful what you tell them as well.

[@t-town9790]

The worse kind is the one who is secretly competitive with you. They listen to all that you do, get insight, then copy it behind your back...all the while pretending not to be interested in what you are doing. Meanwhile they are mimicking your life....CLIP!

[@thatgirl6472]

So true it's irritating

[@beans9019]

literally happened to me. I told 2 coworkers that I was friends with (they were closer) about how I wanted to start a bakery… 2 weeks later one of them started one online. Never again will I be friends with a coworker

[@Lozie82]

@@beans9019those are the worst.

[@LateshaRenee]

Leveling up in life will expose all of your frenemys!

[@Berlanciamyrtil]

Yes.

[@GP-gt4bo]

🎯

[@marciasantelli-jones1557]

Frenemies are clearly insecure, and the biggest Red Flag is they can not be happy for you. You can tell when you’re rocking your career, your appearance, goals bc you’ll see their snippy attitude. Do not tell them anything negative or personal, bc they will use that same info to undermine your character, and or stir the pot.

[@Thelawbossfirm]

There are persons who will never extend a congratulatory word but will be the first to ask how you got xyz opportunity when they see you in person. Sometimes even if they're seemingly doing better they'll still be a competitive vibe. It was hard for me to graple with this at first.

[@shawneegirl1980]

Or there are those who give a congrats....and act happy for u...but they really aren't...gotta watch those too

[@payt_the_princess5820]

Frenemies are major projectors as well. They will be doing all 1-10 things but accuse you of doing these things because they cannot own up to their toxicity and have to make it about you. Frenemies are just meant to be left alone.

[@Monaedeezy]

Payt_The_Princess accurate

[@janellerivera4953]

Well said

[@callalilly4743]

They can be family members too.

[@The_torero]

They are actually worse.

[@AboveRubiesTV]

Pamelafountain60 jones And/or because they’re supposed to be your support system and help against people like that smh

[@aminah761]

preppy vamp yes

[@audrablue515]

Frenemies are the worst. I avoid them by being friendly with all women but close friends with none. I don't compete with other women for anything, especially men. If a man wants me he will make his interest known and concentrate on me, he won't be swayed or have his head turned by some other woman. And if that does happen, I just walk away from him and he doesn't get a second chance. I have high self worth and high self esteem and it took me a lot of work to get to this point. I'm proud of my progress and success in reconnecting with my feminine self. That has solved a lot of relationship issues that I had for years. Now I'm happy and stable and just do my own thing but I say nothing to anyone. I'm close with my sister and we are best friends and we trust each other and we're both happy with that.

[@nextstar5833]

They never invite you anywhere. They usually dont want to come over and see you have a bettet home than theirs

[@ambitiousblackgirl3013]

Frenemies can definitely be men also. I just listened to this and couldn’t help but think of my ex who at the time I thought was my best friend.

[@The1change]

Same

[@hb7580]

YESSS!!

[@lexyred6289]

my old roommate legit had told me my ex was jealous of me and it took me a min and noticed that if you're with a DUSTY then he will be jealous of you

[@rokia3929]

Me too

[@ej1722]

Yes, it's like sleeping with the Enemy ‼️

[@mrsmoore-zo1gw]

I felt the frenemy vibes from my female in-laws very early on, because my husband proposed quickly, we bought a house and were traveling pretty often.Then i had a couple miscarriages, gained a lot of weight... it felt like the shade subsided. But lemme tell you, after we finally had our babies back-to-back, and my husband asked me to be a stay at home mom - they got Mad Mad lol. Plus Ive lost a lot of weight and one of them done started spreading lies about me lol and they all going along with it. Havent spoken to any of them in a minute but they on group-chats daily talking about scripture and family smh lol. The hypocrisy lmao! You just gotta keep laughing and keep winning

[@lynnmorris8659]

Having a frenemy type of situation with a certain individual at my job. The sad part is, I really liked this girl, and I thought we were honestly cool. Turns out that I was wrong again. 🤦🏾‍♀️

[@kymjoy206]

Funny how I'm Goin through the exact thing except for the one who is jealous of me is almost 10 years younger😝😂 it's not always the older one jealous😪

[@davise26]

@@Giggles50 yes gurl. They're always try to ask about ur life and get mad when you don't want to talk to them.

[@lynnmorris8659]

All very true statements ladies.

[@davise26]

@@dimediamond u know it's always the basic heifa. That just gotta compare her life 😂

[@kynathomas4809]

Do a slow fade away. Slowly ease out of conversing with her, eat lunch while reading on your phone/ laptop, don't answer when she calls just make an excuse if she says why didn't you answer. She will get the picture and buzz off.

[@erikaessindo1916]

I'm a 17 years old black girl living in germany and I'm so happy to be learning all this while still young. I love being feminine and I know that others notice my feminine energy. What I've also noticed that some of the girls in my grade try to bring down my femininity I guess because they're jealous. Thank goodness that I have always been a very confident person and I just let those girls do what they do. Real confidence is quiet. 🤫❤️

[@gaia2195]

A so called friend recently burnt a hole in my dress even though I didn’t ask her to iron it and it didn’t need ironing... this was five minutes before I was about to wear it.... shady AF

[@bonvivant3704]

Black Empress I’m glad you peeped the bullshit

[@vinyasa748]

Lmaoooo

[@mercedesharrison5550]

Four years later I am pissed for you

[@SandraSalomeAngolorctr]

I didn't know I had a frenemy until she started telling me things like "I don't even know why men like you, you are not even that pretty!", "Why can't I have a man like yours?" She even once tried to ask me to cheat on my man. She didn't like my other friends. I didn't know who she was until she lived with me.

[@vinyasa748]

Wow she’s bold lmao wtf

[@lexo1189]

I can relate to this I had a “ frenemy” ask in front of the whole class “ do boys even like you ?then proceed to get upset when someone she felt was out of my league pursue me” I had so many encounters with mean ruthless people like that in my early life that I don’t bother with them anymore I like colleagues and acquaintances better

[@elizabethowens8548]

I've been waiting for this. I don't want to be one and I don't want them around me

[@bonvivant3704]

Elizabeth Owens 💯

[@CiaobellaAmour]

Elizabeth Owens periodt

[@missskinndeepunapologetically]

Frenemy exist more and more! The list 1-10 was very interesting. I've learned throughout my 42 years that our truest friend is SELF. I never understood that until I watched friends of 20 years fall off. Reasonings vary. And these frenemies are never available unless they are benefiting in some way. Their friendship comes with conditions. Closing them off is best because they are as poisonous as a venomous snake.

[@missskinndeepunapologetically]

@vea..... Hey beauty.. You already know luv. Our black is beautiful. 43 in January 😘

[@missskinndeepunapologetically]

@karen... I can relate

[@bj77755]

You're absolutely right, trust NO one but yourself. It doesn't get any better.

[@cshell2001]

Well said love this 😀👏🙌 💥

[@ohmygoddess492]

I had frenemies and haters throughout my life. I was the type that was too loyal or nice. Now I can spot a frenemy early and cut them off with a quickness. For now I'm my own best friend until I meet someone that matches my loyalty.

[@soulfulkisses8046]

Yes Yes and Yes... This is so true! They will try to copy the way you dress ... The way you talk... And this is very small but you will catch them staring at you with a evil look... Thanks for sharing Chloe!😘

[@NaomiMordi]

There is nothing small about that evil look. Lol.

[@brianabellissima1264]

So true. It’s really creepy when you think about the malevolent presence that comes to presenting itself as a “friend”.

[@The_torero]

I had a "cousin" behave in this exact manner. Even one of my friends caught her giving me the evil eye. I cut the bitch off quick. I don't bother with her at ALL.

[@prettyloubey8411]

@@NaomiMordiright👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾

[@Lex.xoxoxo]

These women will shade the hell out of you and then turn around and come to work with your same hairstyle.

[@elizabethowens8548]

I had to ghost a frienemy. No contact with narcissists also you become who are with. My frienemie is third marriage with a dusty and she's jealous i have a provider man. Thank you Chloe our friendships are extremely important. I have had my fill of low vibration women.

[@myriamwilliams]

I ❤️That you ghosted her . You seriously rock

[@kgs2280]

Yeah, my “best frenemy” discovered that I had started dating a guy who was about five levels higher than the usual (or so I thought), so she slept with him. So that took care of both of them in one swoop. Turned out that even though he had looks and money, he wasn’t really a nice guy (besides sleeping with my best “friend”), so I guess she did me a favor by exposing his real self to me. It hurt, but I was saved a lot of further hurt in the future.

[@Maxymiliaa]

NOTE: just because they do not exhibit all the behaviors mentioned, does not mean they are not a frenemy.

[@Chevonne8]

I’ve also learned that these types of women can have way more than you and still talk down to you and act as if they are better than you. You eventually see the emotional damage they cause later on. And they don’t really care because they move on with their lives.

[@chrisd9248]

This person that I work with that I thought was my friend, made fun of me for losing weight. She keeps telling me I look like a crack head. It's heartbreaking because as a black woman I always found it difficult to make friends with other black woman. I thought I had finally found a real friend but I guess not.

[@vfree4579]

When she makes a statement like that again and she will you have to smile and come back with a humorous come back very loud non-abrasive that will make her shut up.

[@myriamwilliams]

Ladies and gentlemen one of the worse things a person can do is mistaken a co worker for a friend , no matter how cool they seem to be . Remember a job is just a job . Your personal life and work should not MIX under any circumstances. !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[@izzysal5152]

P T I love this comment!

[@Missms1338]

Some Black people/culture is just dead weight in general.. even mothers .. it’s crazy..

[@bj77755]

She's not your friend, she is Jealous, continue to be kind, but move on, she is dangerous. God bless.

[@sonyacollins6685]

One good way to spot a frenemy is by just paying close attention to their actions! Example: notice how sometimes when you tell them something that makes you sad, angry, or you mention how someone did you wrong or things are not going right for you and they look you in the face and smile or laugh. So remember ladies always watch these women's action's towards you. One more thing notice how some speak to you in a snappy tone like they are mad at you but yet and still you never did them wrong.

[@FeminineVibez]

I had a friend that was jealous because I went away to college....

[@PortraitofAsha]

Same!

[@sonyab2u974]

Same! Lost who I thought was my best friend at that time....i was growing and she apparently felt like she wasn't

[@stacey-annrobinson9557]

I had a frenemy who I cut off 10 years ago. I wish her no ill will, but still after 10 years she will ask people about what I'm doing, who I'm dating and belittle me and my character so that people will think badly of me. I find it sad and I feel pity for her, that after 10 years of not speaking she is still invested in my character assassination.

[@anareid1222]

@@kayshera8872 lol

[@shantereamartin5819]

She obsessed

[@vfree4579]

That's really scary and remember the words says that jealousy is as cruel as the grave. These people can literally murder you because of their dysfunctional feelings.

[@samiawilliams151]

How did you find out she was talking about you?

[@stacey-annrobinson9557]

@Samia William you see what happens in the dark must come to light

[@cheryle1]

I had a friend in high school that was a frenemy but I didn't realize it at the time. She went to the prom with the boy I liked. When I met my husband in college, she tried to charm him too but it didn't work. We fell out of touch. I ran into her years later and invited her to lunch. I was a happy, stay at home mom. The sight of me living my best life broke something in her. Never saw her since....🤷‍♀️ This is a great video. Thanks Chloe. 😘😘

[@NekeishaWise]

These kind of women harbor the Jezebel Spirit which is y they are so wicked. A frenemy will take yo life! #IKnowFromExperience

[@NekeishaWise]

@Nubian Goddess I am sorry to hear that! My frenemy went as far as to put voodoo me! I did die but was brought back n I removed it and TIL this day she still jealous of me too n that happened 10 years ago smh. She looks a hot mess now.

[@NekeishaWise]

@@laurencw731 Omg true! She was laughing her ass off! Meanwhile she looks like she's a walking zombie. I thought to myself: keep that same energy when u r getting dragged to the pits of hell

[@NekeishaWise]

@Christina Masemo Girl Yes! She was THAT angry. I never in my days thought about doing nobody like that.. including her! She has demonS in her tho. She is severely messed up.

[@NekeishaWise]

@Christina Masemo It's Dangerous to fool with people that are jealous hearted

[@NekeishaWise]

But like Lauren said I am laughing now 😊

[@kimberlyyoung4843]

Ok Chloe, I'm going to fess up. I've been a Frenemy; with one person specifically. And yes it was(is) because I was competing directly with that person for men. In retrospect, this person was way more feminine than me. Instead of creating this negative energy I've begun to focus on my own femininity, and people have noticed I might add. I started telling people about your channel and how it has helped change my mindset but everyone was not ready to receive this information. Now I have my own frenemies, lol.

[@raymeester7883]

Good for you, Kimberly.

[@TinaKai25]

Keep your level up journey to yourself

[@bonvivant3704]

I stan!

[@acomment5991]

Good for you for leveling up and changing things! Wishing you continued success

[@shawneegirl1980]

wow....I love this. It takes a MATURE woman to be able to admit this. My hat is off to you ma'am

[@lexyred6289]

had a frenemy who called me bougie for having a certain taste, another time when i was giving her a ride and was parking I was using my backup camera and she told me I was showing off, then i got into a masters program and soon after she dissapeared. I should have known from the beginning she was a hater

[@XxMercuriiXx]

Seems like it’s better to have acquaintances vs friends the older you get

[@narcfreekeekee9168]

These are all signs of a toxic person,or a covert narcissist.Learn about cluster b personality disorders ladies.

[@SaharaAP]

Yes covert narcissist they are cowards. Don’t mind them they wish they were you. They love clingy on to strong minded go getter. Watch once they find out they can’t be you. They’ll try their hardest to destroy you. Their Envious nature eats them up!

[@narcfreekeekee9168]

Sahara AP that’s it in a nutshell sis I thank you

[@PortiaMonique]

I’ve dealt with jealous people my entire life... I’ve learned to be self sustained and maintained.

[@megan7767]

Also, if you ask a frenemy to do you a favor they will go above and beyond because they have so much to prove to you. Gestures are not always genuine, do not get this confused.

[@akishapeters]

How is someone going above and beyond a secret enemy. If anything they won’t do you a favor at all

[@almondmilksoda]

@@akishapetersSo they can use the "favor" they did for you, against you. They use it as leverage to get what they want out of you, or to control your behavior.

[@akishapeters]

@@almondmilksoda they might do one favor but ain’t no secret enemy going above and beyond for you

[@ummzahra9196]

Sit with people who match your vibrations sit with people who match your energy

[@Tiffanytramaine]

I learned this late in life. Women of all ages fall victim to this. I know I wasted years on women in my life who ultimately were contributing to creating the pit of what I called my life. Now that I am at one with myself and more aware of world around me I am in a better place mentally, spiritually & physically. But that’s the goal right? Leveling up above the herd.

[@lalamega1146]

#1 hit home!!! Some of My bridesmaid started acting funny, not returning calls, not hanging out, not coming to see me any longer and eventually abandoning our relationship once I got married!!!! They acted Like we didn’t have history, like we didn’t grow up together!!! I later realized they stopped playing for my team. Oh well, still doing well with my provider husband!!!!

[@TiggysTC]

Yesss!!! I have had frenemies in my family and in my inner circle and I didn't even know it😢. So sad! For me, you don't want to believe you have these frenemies because it's the ones who you least expect it to be!! I've had a few in my life but didn't even realize it because they caught me off guard. They thought higher of me than I thought of myself!!🤷🏾‍♀️Watch out for the "friends" who only come around during hard times but don't come around to celebrate you during good times 🤔

[@anonymousbap3406]

Im experiencing this in my workplace now. I have already started leaving for an errand during lunch breaks to avoid these women. The love is so fake but the hate is so real. It’s like they’re obsessed with the details of my life but secretly despise me, try to throw shade and always trying to be critical. It’s very easy to spot and avoid!

[@myriamwilliams]

Co workers should be just that . Making friends with co worker is one of the most self sabotaging things one can do . That’s a place of business. We have to leave our private lives at home .

[@vanessaroper3028]

S williams true

[@samiawilliams151]

Tell more

[@missc9186]

Yes I had a Frenemy that ghosted me after she saw I was doing good. I felt the energy was off with her from the beginning and it’s an uneasy creepy feeling. I pray for her 🙏🏽

[@Italiza587]

Sounds like a narcissist

[@raymeester7883]

Most are. But the narcissist is probably the worst kind.

[@genevawelch9865]

Raymeester No...they are all narcissists those frenemies. The worst kinds are the ones who are low key psychopaths/sociopaths wearing the fake mask of being a caring friend while secretly destroying you. They only get close to you so they can destroy you.

[@raymeester7883]

@@genevawelch9865 Like I said, not all. Some are co-dependants or histronics. Some can't help themselves and are as much as victim as they are violators. Bottomline: Stay aware and stay safe. Keep healthy boundaries. I agree with Chloe_ most of the times.

[@RemyandOpie]

Hate when a friend is jealous when you succeed in something.

[@user-nq8nl4wh9w]

Great video. I have had these situations all my life. My best friend who ive known almost all my life showed her true colors a few years ago when i went natural. She told me natural hair was unprofessional. Even though it hurt my feelings now guess who is natural now because my hair is almost touching my butt. Then i thought since i been experiencing hate from the women that are on a equal playing field ill upgrade my friends. Don’t be fooled ladies. The ones that have more than you can hate as well. I figured this out when my friend at the time who I admired gave me career advice. When i came back to thank her she made a comment that id never forget. She said I never thought you would actually take my advice. So in essence she didn’t think i could catch her. So ladies be careful remember the number one emotion that gets people killed is jealousy so back away from these types of people quietly and slowly and learn to be your own best friend.

[@ClaireHaire]

I lost several "friends" when I got engaged, I literally had a friend who texted me " I can't be in your wedding bc my love life isn't going how I want it". I had to respect the honesty but, with women it's hard for me to be friends with and it's bc of my appearance. I'm 5'10"(if you don't believe me I have a youtube) & I have modeled before, it's tough to get women to see past that and that I'm genuine. The few friends I do have are confident and that's the only way it works bc, I've had a frenemies in the past who stopped invited me out bc I would get the lion's share of attention.

[@BriaBarrows]

This is common.

[@thatchickdeesha7026]

Ladies your emerging Hypergamy will cause your frenemies to itch. Step aside and let them scratch.💙

[@AnnafromHungarylvNW]

My sister is a frenemy 😢 It's hard when they themselves don't realize that they don't have your best interest in mind.

[@maureen_momo]

That self-sabotage part... wheeeww! Lord! I felt that in my spirit!

[@missskinndeepunapologetically]

And why is it, when they find a glow up or level up, they almost never include you in their celebration?? @chloe_

[@bj77755]

Oh my, so true..

[@imaginedlife-style7026]

I'm 29. I had a friend who told me how I didn't achieve a lot in life because I don't have a child yet and not yet married at my age! She said a lot of negative things about me, aggressively! I realized that she is a very jealous person and not a good friend who always talk about how tiny my body is for a 29 year old. I'm very intelligent, self-employed as a fashion designer and a chef (I have a mobile kitchen), I have a relationship with Jesus Christ, I recently started dating this amazing guy who's a doctor (we were old friends), I've been waiting for my type! So this girl let's the devil use her to try to suck strength and energy out of me. GUESS WHAT SIS? I'm a bad ass who knows who she is, what she wants, who prays and I'm fuckin hot you guys!!! Monsters are not in the woods, they're right next to you! watch out. Edit: my late dad told me to stay away from friends. I see what he meant now.

[@TiondaRae]

Wow, she was jealous and a pick-me.

[@toni_60505]

Oh my goodness! I'm surrounded by women at my job who are like this. Theres this one female that acts like she is a supportive friend only to get information about yr business or other ppls business. She is soooooo fake and it makes my skin crawl. The only time she says anything to me is when either she needs some advice from me about her relationship or wants to know whats going on in mine. I knew her first and then my boyfriend became friends with her. After I told her what he did to me, cheated, she acted like she was gonna tell him about himself on my behalf for whatever reason. I look up and they're over there laughing and talking. She didn't know I seen her and when she came back to me she acted as if she had gave him the business!!!!! I didnt say anything but I knew what she was all about in that moment to see and hear the hurt and pain in my voice and to be so unaffected by it feeling ok enough to laugh and joke with him was enough for me. That made me feel like secretly inside of herself she was loving what was going on between him and I. Just crazy!!! I said all of that to say be careful who you allow in yr presence on a daily basis.

[@acomment5991]

Tonavishoup Sessoms take it from someone who has been married for 15 years and in her 40’s. Don’t let your friends speak for you in your relationship. They cause more trouble and usually don’t keep it to themselves as they think that is now their business too because they are part of it.

[@toni_60505]

Exactly!! That's exactly how she acted, as if were here business, because she felt like she was involved. Its something to see especially when you see how that person was undermining me right in my face. It's just crazy!!

[@chellyvino]

Why are people like this? I’ll never understand this. There’s enough room for all of us. I’ve learned that I’ll never change people.

[@NaomiMordi]

This speaks to my soul. It's awful.

[@Lovely_Diva]

Wow I now realized that I've had plenty frenemies in the past. I cut them all of quick.Thats why I barely have any female friends. I tend to get along better with men and married women. I have a friend now who I have decided to cut off. I've been there for her through alot but she has demonstrated practically everything that was mentioned in the video. So I'm done with her!!! People like that are dangerous. Luckily I've never told her any of my personal business or secrets. I've always been a private person since childhood!!!!!

[@Lovely_Diva]

@@Giggles50 That's so true. You cant trust females these days...smh. I'm so sorry for the experience that you went through. She was jealous of tour marriage..smh. But she didnt win in the end...you are the winner!!!

[@ingridg6141]

Lovely Lady Damn, that’s a great idea! I’ll probably have better luck (& actually have had better luck now that I think about it) with women who are married and don’t have time for bs. 🙌🏽💕 there’s hope! Lol

[@Lovely_Diva]

@@ingridg6141 Exactly they make the best friends. I have two female friends who married and they are so warm caring and genuine. No games ot nothing. There is hope you will find better friends who are on your level❤❤

[@ImabelleRegine]

Man this is so true. Its crazy because you can have good times with a frenenemy. The whole time they are so jealous of you. Glad I cut it all off

[@queenofhearts1138]

When I lost the 60lbs, I know it was hard for them. It was hard for them bc I was the short plump girl in the shadows. I was the one overlooked for the most part not getting any shine. Now, my glow is undeniable. Now, I am unapologetically feeling myself. One is asking me to send her my old clothes. No, I won't. You see, I was the kid who would always cover my paper. I would never let someone cheat off my exam. Its kind of the same... Why should you don my style? I crafted and curated my taste. I know what works for me. I know what suits my frame. I've perfected my style and personna. Spend some time with yourself and develop your own.

[@i.l.746]

Chloe is asking you to DECLUTTER. Take heed 💁🏾‍♀️

[@jaybae7315]

I have the best friends EVER and for life - Me, Myself and I. And we all go hard in the paint for each other.

[@lorriekelly964]

And they can be Men Too .

[@The_torero]

Yep, and to be honest I think black men are the worst for it. When they see a woman has a lot going for her, they will try to destroy her, especially if she wants nothing to do with him romantically.

[@djackson1812]

Unfortunately, I have sisters I believe that fall into this category and when attempting to confront them and speak on it, they avoid me at all costs. Till this day, I have no clue what I did to them but seen all the red flags. The thing with me is I always try to find the best in people, which causes me to overlook the toxicity in folks. Unfortunately, it ends up all bad for me in the end.

[@billiebillie678]

I had to let all my female "friends" go this year. Really, I didn't have the courage to let them go but the Universe removed them from my life one by one in the most amazing ways. I have been very alone and lonely for months now but I'm learning to be my own best friend. At this stage of my life, I no longer have the strength to invest in female friendships like that. I'm only going to find like-minded people who I can go to events with and that's it. Anything deep that I have to discuss will be with a trusted therapist. SMH

[@The_torero]

You are 100% spot on with your analysis of the "frenemy". The majority of my frenemies are actually relatives. I have an aunt who is a prolific frenemy because she has tried her bullshit with not only me and my mother, but other family members aswell. She has a habit of getting close to other women, lulling them into a false sense of security by gaining their trust (I never trusted her, thankfully), digging for any "dirt" on them, then using it against them by gossiping about them behind their back. She is morbidly jealous of practically every female around her because she has made foolish decisions in her youth that have now left her life in a complete mess. Always listen to your gut about people like this because your instincts are always right. The ONLY way to deal with them is to cut them out of your life completely and let them rot in their own misery.

[@egersis8]

I have an aunt like this too. I speak to her once or twice a year tops. I also have a friend like this who I saw only today. For YEARS my intuition has been telling me not to trust her but I override it by feeling I’m being too harsh on her. Now I have to accept my intuition is telling me this for a reason.

[@The_torero]

@@egersis8 ..Yes, always listen to your gut. It will never let you down in situations like this.

[@EmilyGiuffre]

Wow. It sounds like we have the same aunt.

[@The_torero]

@@EmilyGiuffre ...Lol..looks like there are many aunts like this.

[@ph4239]

" Give your gut a nagging feeling" Thank you for putting that into words for me. I'm so lost in this world. I actually thought women were to stick together. I actually cared so deeply for all of my friends. So stupid of me. I'll be watching out for number one from now on.

[@biggieshorty]

I definitely have had a frenemy. My success has distanced her. She is miserable, self loathing, & stagnant. You are correct, she did not have a car, probably cannot get a license and was using me for that! LOL I only hang around leveled up women with high self esteem, positive attitudes and outlooks now.

[@xchoc86x]

Having a good child will piss a frenemy off too

[@shebeeglam]

Many years ago, an associate of mines invited me to attend her celebration. She and I took pictures...she post one of our pictures and I received more comments than she did. Because I received more comments than her, she replied back to one comment of a mutual acquaintance and said, "This isn't about She, it's about me and my day!" She cropped me out of the picture and re-posted it!!! Of course, I did see the original picture but didn't see her comment. Til this day, I haven't spoken to her about this and I never will. I truly thought with over 20 years of friendship she and I were solid....smh.

[@ebrixox]

I was just thinking abt this. It’s sad really. I envy the relationships men are able to have. I’m my own best friend but l miss having that close relationship with a friend.

[@wildangel4452]

Me too. It's sad

[@shawneegirl1980]

I do too...I miss having a friend 😔

[@Koda-ys1lg]

The involvement of men and the presence of men have been the greatest catalysts for exposing frenemies. I’ve noticed this common denominator in every situation where I’ve dealt with frenemies. Aside from the mere insecurity of a woman.

[@norapeace6526]

So a frienemy is basically a narcissist 😂

[@TayBleezy]

Nora Peace Exactly!! Envious, secret competitions and no empathy

[@missj5564]

I had one of those, she would talk about me behind my back, saying negative things to others about me. She was also a user, she thought I was her personal assistant. She would say backhanded things and laugh and say it is a joke. She would put others down (especially wonen that were smaller than her) to feel good about herself. I eventually cut her and her toxic behavior off.

[@humbleheart2650]

The silent treatment never fails me in general in life! Game changer for my peace of mind.

[@IndigoCosmic]

I see how many comments are under this video and that tells me how serious these topics are. As much as I enjoy female friendship I'm very protective of myself when it comes to making friends because outside of when I was a little girl, I've only had bad experiences with female friendship except for maybe one and I met her through a spiritual practice. Besides that I've found women to always end up acting jealous and reveling in my pain, especially pain with men so I just stay away from women all together now.

[@AHintOfAshelyLife]

.... I see some of these qualities in my Sister who for a long time we were super close. But over the years I’ve notice she has been silently competing with me, and i have ALWAYS supported her in her growth in life and have always been loyal to her right,wrong or indifferent. But I have back off her, it hurts because it’s my blood and i love her & would doing anything for her. 😔 smh but i have to let it go n move on for my peace of mind.

[@lhoward76]

Whewww Chloe, spot on as usual! I've lost so many so called friends over the years due to constant passive aggressiveness. Claiming they were happy for me but I always could feel the jealous vibes. Im older now and can care less about keeping the company just to say I have a friend..

[@Nketsi_kets]

This is true. I only hang out with queens and it has helped me a lot even with men. My man started spoiling me now that I am hanging with better quality women, perhaps I am showing up differently . I don’t know if it makes sense but… thank you

[@arabellerose6242]

Ladies, while everything Chloe said is very true and helpful, don’t deceive yourself into thinking that men have better relationships amongst themselves because they really don’t. They may have less of the competition for the opposite sex that we have but they have deeper issues in their friendships it’s actually sad.

[@lindagithaiga1974]

What say it louder 🔊

[@Serene.goddess]

This was kind of difficult for me to watch because it brought up an awful memory of a frenemy I once had...she was most definitely emotionally abusive and always found a way to sneak dis...the biggest mistake I made was trusting her enough to tell her about some problems I was having with my husbands family...this woman went behind me and had a whole conversation with my husband about everything I told her. My husband approached me about it. I was so irritated. She never told me she had that convo with my husband so one day I decided to approach her about it...imagine this woman telling me ‘she forgot to tell me about it’. I cut her off right then and there. That was the last straw for me.

[@thatgirl6472]

So wrong on so many levels smh glad u cut her off.

[@lilouliving]

That same thing happened to me. That is so fake